Shining Bright
by Jack Trader
Summary: Once upon a time a dashing N7 Commander ran into a dark and scary alley to rescue a young Quarian girl who just happened to have really valuable information he needed. He had no idea who he was about to meet, and what impact she would have on the rest of his life. A comic romance which spans all three games and beyond.
1. Chapter 1 - A Meeting

Starts my story, Shining Bright  
Hope you'll find the style alright,  
As I pick up pen and write,  
On this cold and winter's night.

Commander John Michael Shepherd slammed through the doors of Chora's Den after adding his own special brand of interior decoration to the lounge. The new decor consisted of blood stains, corpses riddled with bullets, holes in the floors, scorch marks from tastefully thrown grenades, and screaming women of both human and Asari breed who were entirely under-dressed for the occasion.

"Oh well," he thought as he dashed to the right and ran past the lighted sign which contained the silhouette of the Asari dancer seated upon an invisible lounge chair. He did not care for gentleman's clubs. Oh of course back when he was a military brat going from station to station with his parents he had the typical adolescent illusions about such places, back when sexual feelings were new, and oh so intense. But after a forged id and a brief flirtation with one of the dancers who no doubt suspected his under-aged vulnerability he couldn't help feeling that there was far less to it than was proclaimed by all his older and more 'mature' friends. The bodies were gorgeous of course, but was that all?

It was a foreshadow of things to come, but he was entirely clueless as to this hint from the author at the time.

That had not been his only foray into the love affairs with the opposite sex. He had always been energetic and athletic; never running the fasted, but always running fast; never jumping the highest but always jumping high. He never was quarterback at the big games but he was half back often enough. He a good balance of strength, constitution, and agility, coupled with a keen eye and swift thinking, which enabled him to be both a good soldier and good leader. Adding the rusty brown hair, deep emerald green eyes, and a firm chin he had always been attractive to most of the girls at the bases. And so he had often dated, and that taught him one of the hard lessons of life, that being that pretty and superficial almost always meant exactly the same thing when found in the opposite sex. Sooner or later you get tired of kissing and want to talk about something other than someone else's girl or boyfriend.

So to suggest there was a slight grin on his face as he blew up Chora's Den trying to get to the owner named Fist, and blew it up some more as he dashed out trying to stop another murder or worse in an alleyway nearby would not be entirely untruthful.

Turning left down the elevated walkway and then a sharp right into an open foyer which contained more doors to other shops and stairs to an upper level he paused and quickly scanned for the nearest entrance to a back 'alley'.

"That's the door there!" shouted Garrus, the tall blue grey Turian on Shepard's five. He was in C-sec on the Citadel

The Citadel was the great space station which hovered near the inner edge of the Goldilocks zone of the Galaxy. It was supposed to have been built fifty thousand years prior by a race known as the Protheans, of which little was known, and it was maintained by a collection of big green bugs who were known simply as keepers. There were none of them any where else in the galaxy, save the Mass Effect Conduits, and no one could explain how they got there, or how they had maintained the place after the extinction of the Protheans. Efforts, both foul and fair to examine them had turned out exactly the same, the creatures died and quickly transformed into a brackish smelling goo which stained the floor until another keeper came along and cleaned it up. No one even knew how they reproduced or where or even if they wanted to.

C-sec was the abbreviation of Citadel Security and it made perfect sense for Garrius to know where the door to the nearby alley was, where the rough, dark, cruel, and not particularly polite affair was about to be done. As a member of C-sec, he knew his precinct of the ward like the back of his crested two fingered one thumb hand, and that meant more than a passing familiarity with all the back-ways and dark alleys of the dirty deeds done dirt cheap variety. He was tall and vaguely humanoid in that he had two legs, two arms, a torso and a head. But his legs were placed more on the side of his lower torso which enabled Turians to run for a far longer time than humans with less fatigue. Which of course was one of the reasons why he had pointed out the door after a running firefight and race against time without so much as a brief pause to pant, let alone catch his breath. Covering his body were various chitin plates which were under standard issue security armor for the most part but likewise formed mandibles on his cheeks and crests upon his scalp. There were not enough toes on the feet, by human standards anyway. And to top it off, there was something vaguely leonine in the Turians in spite of appearances. Even though they looked nothing like cats, you thought cat when you saw them.

So Shepherd and his team dashed through the door into an alley lit with a reddish tinge as if to say, 'here's the perfect venue for subterfuge and betrayals and murder most foul.' If Shepherd had not been busy trying to save a young Quarian's life, who was just twenty five meters in front of him next to a Turian and security robots, he might have made some comment about feeling like he was in some dramatic police vid or - god forbid - computer game.

The young Quarian was named Tali'Zorah Nar Rayya. Like all other Quarians she was encased entirely in a suit with a helmet and large visor. The Quarian immune system had suffered severe deterioration over the past 300 years, since they had been driven from their home world and colonies by the Geth, a race of androids who had initially be created by the Quarians for service in their galactic territories. As a consequence, only a handful of Asari and Krogans could remember what Quarians looked like before they had been forced to wear those protective suits. There were of course, illustrations in ancient books on xenobiology which could have been found in some of the more ancient Asari monasteries, but those were for the most part inaccessible and for non-Asari, fraught with perils unanticipated by ordinary humans. But fortunately for you gentle reader, your author was not one of those ordinary humans and he knew exactly what Quarians looked like, and in particular Tali whom he will now describe.

Quarians resembled humans in many ways, more so than Turians, but not as much as Asari who were almost entirely identical save for the head crests and blue gently scaled skin. Quarians were just a bit more alien. Tali, like any human female, possessed a mouth, nose, cheeks and chin, a pair of eyes and a head of hair. Her torso likewise resembled woman save that her waist was a bit more narrow than ordinary women and her hips were a bit wider. Her arms and thighs were likewise similar, but unlike humans, she had two fingers and a thumb on each hand. Each leg had two knees, one in front and one in back, for they were similar to a gazelle, deer, or antelope. Her feet were very much like those of climbing mammal, and indeed they were initially designed for that purpose. There were two toes, one on each side of the foot pad which formed a narrow triangle from the ankle to the front and were narrow. And then a prehensile thumb set further back. Had the toenails not been trimmed, they eventually would have curved and narrowed to form a rather tough claw. Tali's ancient ancestors had be able to easily climb the trees of Rannoch, the ancient home world, to gather the fruits, flowers, eggs from the nests, and small edible mammals which nested in such trees; run from predators, and leap from large branch to large branch or from rock outcropping to rock outcropping. It would have reminded an ancient observer of a pretty monkey.

Her front teeth were small and similar to a dog's front teeth, rounded in the center with two small points on each side and the canines just a fraction longer before one came to the molars. Since they were smaller, there were two more of them between the canines than those of a human, but when she smiled, it lent a certain delicate quality to the smile. There were ears behind the jaw in the same place as found on humans, but there was no edge to them, no cup of cartilage and skin like that of a human or other earth animal. Rather, a small hole enclosed by the slightest hint of ridge. Consequently, Qurians could not hear as well as humans, though the differences were slight. The next variation was the hair on the head. It was not a single strand like humans, but reminded one of the ends of ostridge feathers, light and soft. Under a microscope, each hair strand would have looked like a close up of a rat's tail, only prettier, or squirrel tail, only less bushy, or a cat's tail, only less hairy. The hair did not rest flat on the head, for it's natural bush thickness caused it to billow out, encasing the face in a thick soft frame. Tali's hair was black, so black as to seem to have a blue sapphire shimmer to it. Her skin was pink. Slightly pinker than the European English skin tones but her entire body was covered in that thin black feathery hair. Outside of the scalp, the hair was so thin and short that one would only know it was there when one looked closely with a magnifying glass. The only evidence that the casual observer would have of it was the faint purple or blue cast of the skin, save for a collection of black V whorls which worked their way down the neck and torso and the arms and legs where the hair was a bit thicker. The overall effect was that the skin was incredibly soft to the touch, reminding humans of kashmir wool. Had a human painter or sculptor tried to paint or carve a classical image of a Quarian, they would have promptly drawn inspiration from the ancient greek renditions of mythological satyrs, fauns, and nymphs, though Quairans had no horns and their hair was not so thick upon the legs as that.

The hair of the Quarian race had served a very essential service to the Rannoch ecosystem. For there were no insects upon Rannoch and cross pollination was performed by the birds and mammals of the planet. The Quarian hair was perfect for catching grains of pollen and small seeds and carrying them for a distance before air movement or vibrations shook them loose to fall or drift to a new flower or spot of moist soil. The tangible result was that when they had been on Rannoch, they had often smelled of flowers and young trees. While Quarians assumed that the absence of perfume on the Migrant Fleet was due to the need to save all resources for survival and not frippery, the real reason was that the Quarians had never needed it and consequently there was no cultural catalyst for it's invention.

It was the eyes of the Quarian which caught the attention of most however. Unlike the eyes of any of the other races which possessed obvious visual appendages, the Quarian eyes were a single surface packed with optic nerves which surrounded the protein crystalline rods which caught and reflected the light. This not only gave the Quarians exceptional night vision, but the ability to see detail to almost a microscopic level. This impressive visual talent was offset by the fact that unlike the human eye, Quarian eyes were set. They could not move their eyes to focus on subjects on the edge of their field of vision. The Quarian had to directly face what they were seeking to observe. From the observer's perspective, the eyes seemed to glow, especially in the dark. It was the precision eyesight of the Quarians which was one of the chief reasons why they were so skilled at technology. When you can see the micro of the micro-circuitry so well, you know how to repair a lot of things other races would be forced to just remove and re-cycle the components of. They also had the potential to being the greatest jewelers gem cutters of the galaxy, but the reality of the Migrant Fleet precluded that from happening. And it would be a few more years before the galaxy discovered just how deadly Quarian snipers could be.

None of this was known to John or his team. They burst in just as Tali knocked aside the hand of the Turian who had been caressing her head and said, "The deal's off." The Turian had pulled his gun, the security androids had likewise produced weapons, Tali had gracefully leaped behind a box which seemed to be in the ideal position to have a gun fight behind. In fact, like some cheesy butch vid, there were more than a few crates and boxes perfectly placed about and every one got something to hide behind as the shooting began in earnest.

John swore silently to himself. This was not the place to have such a fight, only Kaiden knew his code talk for combat, Ashley had just joined the team on Eden Prime and the fighting there had not been sufficient to train her well. Wrex, the Krogan and Garrus the Turian were both entirely new to him, and already Wrex had shown himself in need of training given that Fist had been shot by him after Fist had not only surrendered, but had answered truthfully about the Quarian. Had Fist not cooperated, they would not be here now and that Quarian would already be dead. Not a good way to start a camaraderie, that Krogan. Garrus was, however, clearly used to fighting with out backup and by keeping an idea of who he was targeting, Shepherd knew where to support and where to move independently. Almost immediately he knew what had to be done, for Wrex charged the Turian bellowing, almost oblivious to the bullets breaking down his shield's resistances. If the commander didn't do something quickly, he would save the Quarian but loose the Krogan.

"Blue!" shouted Shepherd over the comm. "Lift your one!"

Kaiden, the only team member of Shepherd's who had been with him since prior to Eden Prime, knew immediately what Shepherd wanted. He applied his biotic lift power on the box just slightly to his front and right from where the Turian was shooting. The Turian, suddenly bereft of cover, found himself the repository of more than a dozen Krogan bullets followed by a head butt. He was pretty much dead by the time his body decided to fly backwards from the head slam.

"Raugh," observed Wrex. His too wide to be real mouth grinned and he hopped a bit from one foot to the other, a sort of "I killed everyone think I get to dance now" thing.

Shepherd walked over to the Krogan.

"Wrex, what the hell were you thinking doing that charge!" he snapped. "You were that close to death you know that?"

Wrex grinned.

"Shepherd you have never fought with a real warrior before so I'll let it slide," he said.

"I didn't know catching bullets with one's body was the mark of a warrior," mused Ashley, "I was trained to duck them myself."

"There's a time to charge and a time to wait!" insisted Shepherd to the Krogan. "I pride myself in the number of former friendly corpses I don't pile up. Got it?"

Wrex nodded and shouldered his assault rifle. He might not understand objections to a charge, but he did understand wanting to preserve the lives of fellow soldiers.

Garrus in the meantime, had walked over to the crate, now somewhat riddled with bullet holes, from where the Quarian had been shooting.

"Well well," he said reaching out his hand to help her up. "Looks like I get to save a second woman from death today. No need to thank me of course. I'm just that good a cop."

The Quarian pointed her pistol at his face.

Garrus wasn't a fool. He knew the stresses of victims, especially those who had just narrowly escaped death, if not rape as a prologue to execution. You didn't get to be that good a cop not knowing that sort of issue and how to handle it.

"Now you hurt me to the core," he said nodding his face to the side and shouldering his sniper rifle all the while directly facing the Quarian. "How you could confuse a handsome and suave hero of the citadel with that scum over there presently showing off his personal bullet collection escapes me." Garrus gestured to the dead Turian who had just threatened the Quarian prior. She turned her face in the direction of the gesture, only briefly, and then turned to look back at Garrus.

Once again Garrus proffered his hand. The Quarian took it and was helped up. As soon as she was up, Garrus let go of her hand and she withdrew it. She looked around, adjusting her feet if necessary to see each of the five members of Commander Shepard's team.

"Humans," she thought. "Three of them. I hope they've taken showers because I've heard humans are really dirty and my filters need replacing."

John walked over to where Garrus was standing and looked at the Quarian, who was now looking directly at him. He noted that all he could see through her visor was the very faint outline of her nose and two pale white glowing eyes.

"The name's Commander Shepherd," he began. "This is Garrus, of C-sec. That is Wrex, this is Kaiden, and that is Ashley. I understand you have information on the Geth which includes evidence against Saren."

As each name was mentioned, Tali looked over the faces, her head facing each one. Garrus and Wrex's expressions seemed non-committal, Kaiden and John's faces seemed to express curiosity, but Ashley's face seemed hard and distant.

"She doesn't like me," thought Tali.

"I am Tali'Zorah nar Rayya," she said. "And yes, I am trying to trade information I have. I was supposed to meet with the Shadow Broker here, but that Turan didn't seem to act as if he was going to show up."

Shepherd found that her voice had a chirping quality to it, which he concluded must have been the consequences of the filter translation system she was speaking through. He wondered what her voice sounded like without the filters.

"He wasn't," said Garus. "You were being set up. While Borla Von still works for the Shadow Broker, Fist betrayed him and set you up for a hit. If we hadn't beaten the truth out of Fist, you would already be dead."

"I knew I couldn't trust him," said Tali. She then muttered something under her breath which was too faint for the translator in her filter system to catch and broadcast.

"From what Von told us," added Shepherd. "The Shadow Broker never is seen publicly. He always works through agents. Even if you had been given a right contact, you never would have met him directly, only his agent."

Tali bowed her head and her shoulders drooped a bit. Then she looked back up at Garrus. Garrus, tilted his head towards Shepherd. She turned to face Shepherd. "I need to make a deal with this information," she said. "I'm on my pilgrimagh and I was hoping this would fetch a sufficient price that I might be able to get a gift for my people and return to the fleet. Some food would be nice to."

"Pilgrimage?" queried Shepherd. He wanted to make sure since she had not ended the word with the jeh sound but rather had ended it with a guh. It might have been her accent, but he was not sure. "We humans have pilgrimages too. I went on one. I walked to Santiago de Compostela when I was eighteen. It was before I joined the N7 forces. It helped me make the decision."

Tali tilted her head.

"Did you find a suitable gift?" she asked.

"Gift?" asked Shepherd. His jaw hung slightly loose and he just looked at Tali's visor. "I suppose the insight that I should join the N7 was a gift, but I was pretty much already go on that so I don't see how it really . . ."

"You got a gift?" asked Tali. "I have to find a gift."

"Ah!" replied Ashley. "Two different pilgrimages we're talking about. We take pilgrimages to gain spiritual insights . . . Or at least I guess we do. I've never done one. I probably should . . . someday."

"It's different for Quarians," answered Tali. "In order to prove my use to my people, I have to leave the fleet, find something to help the fleet, and then return with it and present it to a ship's captain. If the gift is good enough, he will take me as a crew member."

"That," said Shepherd. "Is what we call a quest."

Tali looked at Shepherd for a moment. Her eyes seemed to glimmer.

"I'm sorry," she said. "My translator does not understand this word . . . Quest."

"To seek a great treasure," suggested Ashley. "To find the holy grail."

Then she smiled ever so slightly and said, "Arise, go forth, and conquer."

"Tennyson?" queried Kaiden.

"Yeah," replied Ashley.

"I had a hard time with Tennyson," admitted Shepherd. "I like Tolkien."

"Meddle not in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger," he quoted.

"I thought it was 'Meddle not in the affairs of dragons for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup,'" offered Kaiden with a slight grin.

"No," suggested Ashley crossing her arms and shifting her weight to her left foot, her facial features suggesting they wanted to express an opinion by making a loud hooting snorting sound.

Tali's head was shifting from Shepherd to Kaiden to Ashley as each one spoke. She noted that Kaiden and Ashley both had the same color hair, black. She also noted that Kaiden seemed to be a happier sort. Ashley had scars on the inside

"Duck," thought Shepherd to himself with a slight smile. "She makes me think of the ducks on the pond behind my grandmother's house."

"We need some place safe for this," suggested Tali. "I've been shot at twice now and the last time was too close to call."

Shepherd and Garrus looked at each other. They both knew the medical center where the Tali's first wound had been treated. It had been the first gun fight of the day and the first women saved from certain death as well, a french accented nurse who's name escaped Shepherd though he could have sworn she should have been named Lelianna for some obscure reason or other.

"Ambassador Udina will need to hear this evidence," suggested Garrus.

"Good call, Garrus," answered John. "We need to get there now."

It was a short walk down the alley to a open area where a public transport auto taxi site was found. It took two vehicles to get all six of the team members and Wrex took up the whole back seat so Kaiden and Ashley sat in the front of his sky-car while Shepherd, Garrus, and Tali, who sat in the back, took the other. And then it was a five minute fly to the embassies and the Ambassadorial office was up a flight of stairs and down a hallway to an open balcony office.

Ambassador Udina was one of those older men who had made the mistake of pursuing power for it's own sake back when he was young and energetic and as a result, thirty years later, he was old, wrinkled, and bitter. He wore white which matched his hair color but the rest of him was a hoary angry in cast.

"What are you doing to me, Shepherd!" he snapped as the team walked in. "Shoot outs in Chora's Den, bullets flying in the medical centers, hysterical nurses, and angry Asari ambassadors!"

"Making your day Ambassador," replied Shepherd smiling. "We found evidence which links Saren to the Geth attacks on Eden Prime."

"You had better explain yourself now," retorted Udina. "And likewise how does this Turian, Krogan, and Quarian come into it?"

"Tali?" asked Shepherd looking at her.

"You're on girl," encouraged Garrus.

"The Geth have stayed behind the Perseus Veil for hundreds of years so when I heard they were moving beyond it, I thought if I was able to gain some information on how they had changhed since we had been driven into exile, this would give us an egh in any effort to retake our home world. So I tracked down a patrol of Geth, followed them until one of them became separated from the rest of the unit. I disabled it and extracted it's memory core," said Tali.

"Wait a moment!" said Captain Anderson, who was Commander Shepherd's direct superior and commander of the Normandy, the ship they had come from Eden Prime on, "When the Geth die, I thought they wipe their memory core so that nothing can be extracted?"

"My people created the Geth," replied Tali. "If you are careful, fast, and lucky, you can save something.

Shepherd whistled.

"Smart girl," he said to himself.

Tali might have heard him, she seemed to tilt her head towards him, but she faced Captain Anderson and continued.

"Here is the important data from the Geth's memory," she said as she turned on her Omni-tool. A recording played from the Omni-tool.

"The beacon on Eden Prime was a major victory," said Saren. "The information has put us one step closer to the Conduit."

"That's it!" cried Captain Anderson joyfully.

"The council will need to hear this!" Agreed Udina.

"But there's more," added Tali.

Both men stopped their brief happy dance and turned back to Tali.

"And one step closer to the return of the Reapers," added a woman's voice from the Omni-tool.

"Who is that?" asked Captain Anderson.

"What are the Reapers?" demanded Udina.

"According to the Geth's memory core," explained Tali. "The Reapers where a machine race which wagged a war of extermination against the Protheans 50,000 years ago and when they had won, they disappeared. The Geth worship them as Gods and are working to bring them back."

"Yes!" cried Shepherd. "It is starting to make sense somewhat. My vision of the beacon on Eden Prime told of the Reapers."

Tali's head was moving from Anderson, to Udina, and then to Shepherd trying to make sense of what they were talking about. It was clear that there was more to this than her data. She had no knowledge of any beacon's and visions. She wanted to learn more.

"I will contact the council, there will be a new meeting," stated Udina. "But it will be at least 24 hours. Commander? Give yourself and your team shore leave until I contact you. Rest, relax, and get ready. Anderson? We have plans to make! Damn this day! We have too many possibilities threatening!"

"I knew you would be happy," said Shepherd with just the faintest whispered hint of "you are such a turkey" in the tone.

Udina was too busy cursing his good luck to notice.

Shepherd and the other five walked out of the office and stood in the hall.

"Twenty-four hours of shore leave," grinned Kaiden. "Par-Tee Time."

"There's a really nice sushi place in the Silversun Ward," suggested Ashley. "Or at least the Galaxy Tour E-Mag says so."

Tali suddenly hopped.

"Can we even afford that?" asked Garrus. "And by the way, we haven't exactly formulated things here. Are we actually a team now? Or do we have a few beers, tell a lot of stories of our adventures; your's mostly made up of course, which I pretend to believe so you won't feel so insignificant, and then we all head our separate ways? Or is this the start of something a little more serious?"

The shift from egotistical jocularity to sudden sternness required Shepherd a full two seconds to assimilate before he answered.

"Kaiden and I were assigned. Ashley? You're the perfect wing-girl for the flank, you kept your head on Eden Prime and remembered what you were best at, so yeah, you're on the team. Wrex? Scarey Krogan is always nice to have on point. But you charge when I say charge; not before. Show yourself capable like that and I want you bad. Garrus, you're smart, calm, and keep a cool head under fire and take initiative. You're in with spades. Tali? A hacker geek is always an asset, especially since it looks like we're getting to play against team Geth. Not only are you smart enough to beat the death wipe, but I saw that leap of yours. You'll be best on my six."

"Six?" asked Garrus, Tali, and Wrex, almost simultaniously.

"And here comes boot camp," groaned Ashley.

Kaiden laughed. "Gonna see your pretty little butchy ass in the mud are we?" he suggested to Ashley.

"Only after I shove a grenade up yours!"

"He'll just fart louder then," groaned Shepherd.

"Feel the love," crooned Kaiden.

"Okay team, I like the idea of a meal. Where?"

"The Sushi place is a bit pricy," reiterated Garrus. "Though the French waiters are very stylish. And you need reservations about a week in advance on most nights. But Silversun is not a bad idea. There is this steak house just up the walkway from Ryuusei's Sushi which serves not only human, but Turian food as well, and that means Tali can eat with us since both Quarians and Turians can eat the same things."

"Steak? If there's beer I'm in," said Kaiden.

"If it struggles before you stab it, I'm in," said Wrex.

"French waiters?" asked Ashley. "Sushi is Japanese cuisine. Why French waiters?"

"It was started by an American firm," finished Garrus.

That explained everything.

Once more there were three to the taxi. But at Garrus' suggestion, they stopped a few hundred feet before the steakhouse, named Bullrush, to walk along the way passing Ryuusei's Sushi.

"They have windows filled with fish," he explained.

John loved aquariums. He had tried to start several when he was younger, even developing a friendship with the various pet store sales clerks as he went from base to base. Most of his fish had died however. He kept forgetting to feed them when he was younger and as he got older, his ideal aquariums were always bigger than his pocket change. He paused and watched the fish for a good three minutes.

He then turned and noticed Tali was looking at the fish too. Or was she? No, she was looking through the aquarium into the inside of the restaurant, watching the line of people in front of the maitre de. She seemed to do this intently for an extended pause. There was what he thought a brief sigh. Then she tossed her head, and turned and sashayed right by him.

"Tali?" he asked, baffled.

"What?" she replied looking at him.

Bullrush Steakhouse possessed a dark wood exterior and tinted windows which obscured all but the lights inside. The silhouettes of people were but brief flickers. Walking in it had the sounds of any restaurant but there were the additional twangs of steel guitars and the voices of young women singing of motherless boyfriends in prison for drunkenness while their pickup trucks rusted in the rain outside by the railroad tracks.

Ashely listened to the music for a moment and sighed while John whispered to himself, "Lord Jesus? Please, kill me now."

"Commander!" snapped Ashley, who had apparently heard John's under the breath prayers. "This is music about real life."

Shepherd groaned.

"Sorry Ash," he said. "I just can't get into it."

"Tell me about this music, Ashley?" queried Tali.

"Why do you want to know?" replied Ashley. Her tone of voice suggested a curious struggle between the attraction of mutual interest and suspicion.

Shepherd moved to the head waiter and signaled table for six, the man looked at the Krogan and led them to a table for eight.

"Ah!" Bellowed Wrex when he saw the table. "Arm room!" He slammed his fists upon the table which responded with a clattering of silverware, the falling of three glasses which rolled across the table before being rescued from certain death by team members and the groans of wood beams and linings suffering a bit more stress than they were designed for.

"Tell me about . . . these pickup trucks she's singing about," continued Tali to Ash.

"Well . . ." began Ash who had never been required to explain her love of country western. "It's a two seated vehicle with a flat bed in the back supported by four tires which is used . . ."

"She's an interesting girl don't you think?" queried Garrus to Shepherd, leaning in.

"You like her?" asked Shepherd to Garrus.

"Yeah Waiter? I'd like the New York Strip, medium, and what are your lagers? Ah, I'll take this one, Wisconsin Snowfall, on draft? Great!" said Kaiden.

"And your order sir?" Said the waiter to the Krogan.

"Um, yeah, I'll have four of the twenty ounce filet mignion with a pinch of basil and cayenne pepper rubbed into the texture. Drizzle just a bit of worchester sauce on it upon searing. Now just sear the outside with the skillet, a good 900 degrees, but don't let it cook in. Keep it rare on the inside. And if you have ryncol? No? Hmmm . . . I'll have the Pinot Noir, year 34, two whole bottles if you would," said Wrex to the waiter.

He paused. Everyone was staring at him open mouthed except Tali who's mouth was unseen (though it too was open).

"What?" he said, part as a query and more as a challenge.

"And what would you like?" asked the waiter looking at Tali.

Tali was looking at the menu.

"Keelah!" she said. "I can't order any of these, they are so expensive."

"It's on me," said Garrus, John, and Kaiden simultaneously.

"What am I?" fumed Ashley. "Chopped liver?"

"Liver Pate," suggested Kaiden who ducked as Ash threw a balled up napkin at him.

"No I can't possibly . . ." began Tali, her eyes behind her visor seeming to show a slight shade of pink.

"You are Such A WEENIE!" bellowed Wrex facing Tali. Several nearby tables paused in their dining, looked at Wrex, and scanned for exits.

"NOW HEAR ME LITTLE QUARIAN!" He continued waving a clenched stoney fist right in front of Tali's visor. "YOU WILL ORDER THE BEST DISH ON THIS MENU. YOU WILL EAT IT! YOU WILL ENJOY IT! YOU WILL ORDER A GOOD DRINK TO GO WITH IT. I WILL PAY FOR IT AND IF YOU DON'T DO THIS I WILL SLAM THAT LITTLE BUCKET HEAD OF YOUR'S SO HARD YOUR GLOWY EYES WILL BE SPITTING SPARKS FOR THE NEXT WEEK!"

"Okay," said Tali in a tiny voice as she seemed to scrunch as low into the chair as possible.

Shepherd was trying very hard to hid the chuckles he was suffering from behind his hand as he looked at Garrus who seemed to remain calm and sedate except for his mandibles which were twitching spasmodically. Kaiden was resting his forehead upon his right hand's fingers and seeming to have intense visual interest in the plate on the table in front of him. Then his shoulders jerked.

"I'll have . . ." began Tali in a quiet meek voice. Then she paused and stared intently at the menu for a moment. Ashley began to fidget.

The waiter, like all the waiters on the Silversun ward, was skilled in reading customers. He now interjected.

"If I may suggest ma'am," he said, "The blue round. It is supposed to be seasoned like the ancient recipes on Rannoch and is very popular with the ship captains and admirals of the fleet when they make stops on the citadel."

"Are you sure it won't be a bother?" began Tali as Wrex turned to face her and raised his fist.

"I'll have that," she decided trying to sound as if the threat of her bucket being rattled until the sparks began to fly had nothing to do with her decision. "With your sugyestion of wine."

"Very good ma'am," he said and finished with the other orders. After he left the table, Ashley sighed as she looked at Kaiden, Garrus, and John looking very amused and Tali trying to both hide from embarrassment as well as contain her excitement at the thought that she was going to get a fancy dinner at a nice restaurant on the Silversun strip.

Everyone looked at each other for an other moment. Wrex sat with his elbows on the table grinning a very toothy grin.

"So about this V-8 enghine," began Tali once again facing Ashley.

Slowly conversation started to pick up again. Wrex and Kaiden began talking about good drinking games and war stories while Ashley struggled to explain the technological principles of V-8 engines on pickup trucks and diesel engines on rail road trains to Tali, who's questions were extremely exacting and showed a quick grasp of the workings of machinery.

Garrus leaned back over to Shepherd.

"I was asking you about Tali earlier and I believe you were asking me if I like her?"

"Yes I was," answered Shepherd.

"I would have to say that while I find her very . . . Um . . . Cute?" He wavered for a moment trying to balance invisible weightless intangible lawn gnomes upon his open palms looking for a way to say it. "I find myself attracted to her like I would my little sister. She's obviously very smart and capable, but even so, she tends to bring out the 'protect me' gene in all of us."

"We did all offer to pay for her dinner," mused John. "And even Ash has picked up on it."

"Yes she did," agreed Garrus. "You can see Ashley struggling with wanting to explain country western music technology to Tali there as a kindred soul while at the same time her hands are twitching like she wants to strangle the poor girl."

Commander Shepherd looked over at Ash. He noted that she was applying more torc to the hand napkin than was considered normal.

"I think she will regard Tali as a rival," suggested Garrus in a low whisper.

"Regulations prohibit fraternization with fellow soldiers," replied Shepherd. "It's not smart even in the best of circumstances."

"True enough," agreed Garrus. "But Commander, you may not have thought out just what is going to happen tomorrow if the council agrees with our evidence. The only person who can take down a Specter is another Specter. You won't be a soldier any more, you will be a Specter and there are no regulations which bind you."

"There is no guarantee that I will be made a Specter tomorrow," answered Shepherd.

"Nor is there any guarantee that you won't. And if there were a pool I know here I'd put my 100 credits."

"Even so, Garrus. I don't see me and Tali. She's not my species. My Church regards marriage as an institution which is open to life for life. We can't have kids, so there would be no marriage."

"There's adoption," answered Garrus.

"It isn't going to happen Garrus," answered Shepherd. He had to admit that adoption, or a willingness to adopt would probably satisfy the Church.

"Kaiden perhaps. He's been talking tech with her too now that Ash has run out of illustrations. Notice how he's smiling?" finished Shepherd.

Garrus looked at Kaiden's efforts to explain the piston process in both steam and internal combustion engines to Tali who was following his hand gestures and trying to imitate the noise either engine made.

This could have proven to be yet another bit of amusement since Tali seemed to have a professional interest in being able to not only understand the noise which the engines made but duplicate it with her voice. But just then the food arrived and everyone discovered just how starved they really were.

Both John and Ashley crossed themselves before tucking in while Kaiden just tucked in. Wrex looked at the fillets upon his plate and then picked up the knife and fork.

"Stupid pokey things wouldn't hurt a pyjak," he said and tossed the silverware over his back. He picked up one of the fillets with his fingers, popped it into his mouth and began to chew contentedly. Ashley's eyes were wide open watching this. She realized that an entire fillet, a nicely cut piece of tender beef, required cutting into fifteen to twenty bite size pieces for a human to consume.

Tali just looked at her plate for a moment. Her meal had been processed into a set of tubes which fit into her mask. The tubes were obviously well made, and embellished with silver. They had been set into a plate which had indentations to hold the tubes in a circular pattern. The entire meal was arranged in such a fashion as to suggest that it's placement was as much a demand of proper cuisine as any other meal laid out upon the plates.

Wrex chose to forgo the wine glass. When the waiter had proffered the cork to him to smell, he simply had popped that into his mouth and chewed it up and eaten it.

"Perfect bouquet," he had said. Now he simply poured the bottle into his mouth.

Tali reached for the first tube of meat, inserted it into her visor's receptacle, and began to chew as it slowly emptied. The white points that marked her eyes blinked out for a moment. The tube emptied. She looked at her plate, and selected a vegetable tube. She inserted that and it too was quickly emptied.

Shepherd looked down back at his steak and potatoes and ate for a moment when he heard a sudden 'whift whift whift whift' and a meeping sound coming from Tali.

He looked up. Garrus was looking. Kaiden was looking. Ash was trying to ignore her and keep eating.

"You okay little Tali?" asked Wrex.

"You are all . . . So . . . sweet to me . . . This is the best meal I've had since I left the fleet," she said. Her shoulders twitched, she bowed her head for a moment making a few more little meeping noises, and once again there was the 'whift whift whift whift' sound which Shepherd realized was some automatic visor cleaner removing something from the interior of her visor plate.

He concluded she must be crying.

"Damn," he thought. "Either she is the sweetest girl I've met in ages or she's refined the manipulation of men tactic to masterwork quality."

Tali took one of her four her wine tubes and drained it.

"I'll be okay (whift whift whift), no really. Thanks (whift whift whift). Just give me a sec- (whift whift whift) -ond to get myself in shape here (whift whift whift).

Ashley commenced to apply such pressure cutting her steak that there was a faint scratching of the knife upon the porcelain. Kaiden later swore that he saw dust flying from where the knife cut into the plate.

"This is really so gooood," Tali continued. She reached for another vegetable tube, finished it off, grabbed another wine tube, drained that.

Shepherd and Kaiden exchanged glances as if to say, "there she goes." They pretended to eat for a moment, trying to enjoy the flavors of the meal while keeping at eye on Tali.

Tali however, apparently oblivious to her peril asked new questions.

"Just what happened before you rescued me?" she asked. "I've heard about visions and Eden Prime but I'm not sure just what the history is back here."

"Well," began Kaiden in a smooth tone. Shepherd decided to let him do all the talking since Tali already seemed to be responsive to him.

"We were assigned to the Normandy a week ago back on Earth per Captain Anderson's orders. The Normandy is a new Alliance ship, cutting edge technology. You'll get to see it since you are part of the team I hope."

"A new ship?" chirped Tali. She was busy working on her next meat tube. It was vanishing faster than the first one.

"Brand new," enthused Kaiden. "I've never been on one that new. I mean even the sleeping tubes don't have that sweaty stink you find on every other ship."

"Way to go, Kaiden," joked Ashley. She was noticing Tali's interest in Kaiden and was starting to lighten up. "That's the way to make a girl feel right at home."

"Hey!" retorted Kaiden. "I'd think any girl would be thrilled to know her sleeping pod wasn't going to smell like drunken sailor sweat and vomit when she climbed into it the first time."

"So what happened then?" asked Tali, who had put a new wine tube into her visor and was sipping the contents with her eyes half closed.

"We were sent on the shakedown cruise to Eden Prime," continued Kaiden. "Me, Jenkins, and Shepherd." He paused and grinned facing Garrus. "And a specter named Nilhus. He was a Turian like you Garrus, only more ugly and scary."

"Hey what do you expect?" answered Garrus. "We Turians work hard on the ugly and scary thing, it's what made us so great in the galaxy."

"I really like this wine," cooed Tali. "And the steak."

"It is a good side of meat isn't it, Tali?" answered Garrus.

Shepherd didn't know if Garrus was smiling. It was hard to tell with Turians.

"Our mission, which we did not get to decide to accept, was to go to this Prothean dig site where a Prothean beacon had been found and ship it back to some egghead institution for study since it was found intact. Nilhus was there to evaluate Shepherd who had been put forth as the first human specter candidate."

Tali looked at Shepherd. Her wine tube was half empty and seemed to just hang there under her visor. He noticed her eyes were focused directly on him.

"So we get into the briefing room as we approach Eden Prime," continued Kaiden. "And Joker, our pilot and all around really cool jerk, throws this message at us about how the dig sight of this Prothean ruin is being overrun with Geth. We get distress warnings from the 212 . . ."

"That was my team," said Ashley quietly.

"Had you ever fought Geth before?" asked Tali. She was sucking down the wine in her tube now quite rapidly. It was emptied and she pulled the last vegetable tube from her dish and nearly inhaled it in a single gulp.

"No," said Kaiden. He paused. "Jenkins never knew what hit him."

Tali reached out and gave Kaiden's hand a brief squeeze.

Shepherd, for just a brief moment, felt a twinge of jealousy. He frowned and shook his head to clear it.

"Then it was just me and Shepherd," continued Kaiden. "Until we see Ashley running like the devil himself were after her."

"I was conducting a tactical retreat!" insisted Ashley.

"You were running like your cute little tush was on fire, girl!" insisted Kaiden.

"I am a MARINE!" snapped Ashley. "I DON'T have a CUTE tush. And I DON'T RUN like it's on FIRE!"

"All Marines run like that," said Kaiden with his eyes a twinkle. "Everyone in the ARMY knows that."

Tali was busy finishing her last meat tube, then set about working on her third wine tube. And noticing that she had a fourth wine tube available, decided she would have that one as well.

"All the while Nilhus is busy ahead of us giving us recon and letting us know his 20," continued Kaiden lifting his hands to express himself better. "Then we get nothing from him and we don't know what happened until we get to the docks and find him dead with a single bullet hole in his head."

"Ouch," muttered Garrus.

"Saren had shot him in the back of the head," stated Shepherd. "There was a single dockworker who had seen it all."

"So knowing that Saren has already got a march on us we double time it to the location of the beacon, getting shot at most of the time and trying to disarm four, count 'em, four nuclear bombs which were set to go off."

"Did you disarm them all Kaiden?" asked Tali, who was clearly interested for she had just drained her last wine tube without even seeming to notice it.

"Well I . . ." Kaiden blushed a bit and shrugged while holding his hands palms up.

"Kaiden and Ashley both provided me with cover fire so I could disarm the bombs," interjected Shepherd. "Without Kaiden on my six I would not have been able to do it. We would have all been dead along with thousands of Eden Prime civilians."

"And missing out on this really good steak dinner," added Kaiden who was lifting his stein of beer and draining the last inch of it.

Suddenly Tali turned and focused entirely on Shepherd.

"You disarmed them? That was so (hic) brave of you," suggested Tali. Her head seemed to go slightly loose on her neck for a moment before she straightened it.

He hated to admit it, but he kind of liked her looking at him like that. Once again Shepherd cleared his head and tried to focus on Kaiden's storytelling skills.

"And then we reached the beacon after killing all the Geth," interjected Kaiden "And that's when . . . it happened."

"What?" asked Tali, leaning forward. She placed her hands upon the table to support herself, but they seemed to suffer from a lack of friction and she started to slid forward and down. She hiccuped again, a light chirping sort of hiccup which Shepherd had to confess struck him as rather cute. She worked her arms back up the table and stuffed them under her chest so she wouldn't lay down on the table itself.

"Ash walked up the beacon and it seemed to catch hold of her and lift it up, and then Shepherd leapt across the way and threw her away from it and then it caught him. And that's when he saw that vision," finished Kaiden.

"So that's three women this team has saved from horrible fates so far," mused Garrus. "One of them twice in a single day. Keep this up and I'm going to accuse the author of over using a trope."

Tali hiccuped again.

"Hey little bucket head," said Wrex grinning. "You cleaned up your plate. There's nothing left. I knew you would eat it if you were made to."

"Sooooo good (hics)," she agreed.

"Heh," grinned Wrex. "You were starving girl. Glad I could put some meat on those skinny bones of yours!" He gave her a friendly punch which nearly knocked her off the chair.

"Now Wreeeeeexxxx," drawled Tali trying to grab the table to hold herself up and missing. "Don be so rough on a girl . . . We're delicate floooooeeerrrrs (hic).

"Heh," said Wrex who put his arm around Tali to hold her up.

"Looks like I got the girl in this chapter," he continued grinning as Tali's head rested upon his shoulder. "Krogan's rule, humans drool."

"Wait!" stammered Kaiden. "What just happened?" He grinned helplessly.

"My heart is broken . . . shattered . . . irretrievably," deadpanned Shepherd.

Ashley was smiling.

"Ahh Commander (hics). I'm sorry I broke ye (hics) your heart."

"Somewhere . . . there's a sun . . . shining. I shall find it . . . someday . . . If I can make it through the overcast skies," continued Shepherd remaining as unemotional as he could. Garrus' mandibles were twitching again.

"When you walk, through a storm, hold your head up high," sang Kaiden with a smooth whiskey tenor looking sweetly at Shepherd. "And don't be afraid of the dark."

"At the edge of the storm is a golden beam," joined Ashley. "And the sweet silver song of the Laaaaaark!"

"Walk on through the rain,  
Walk on through the storm.  
Though your dreams may be tossed and blooooooooown!  
Walk On Walk On, Walk On Walk On,  
And you'll never walk alooooooooooooooooone!"

Shepherd looked nobly into the distance and placed his hand over his heart. Kaiden, Ashley, and Garrus all were now laughing. Wrex simply grinned and Tali giggled.

The meal finished, Shepherd signaled for the check and paid for it all much to the protests of Kaiden, Wrex, and Garrus.

"On me tonight," he insisted. "We don't know when we'll have another time to unwind. Things are moving in the shadows behind the thrones. I suspect this is our last night for a long time."

There was a brief period of silence as each of the team members considered his words for a moment, save Tali who was quietly, delicately, and demurely snoring on Wrex's shoulder.

They left the restaurant and took the taxies back to the docking bay where the Normandy was waiting.

Decades later in his life, Shepherd would remember this night and muse, "Had I only known. But then he always likes surprises."


	2. Chapter 2 - N7 Drill

Tali was tossing and turning in her sleeping pod. The ship was quiet. Silent. The only sound she could hear was her own gentle breathing.

"What is wrong?" she thought.

She was exhausted. She should be falling asleep. After all she had been through.

She barely remembered her first night on the Normandy. She was told this was her sleeping pod, but she was too dizzy to pay that much attention to it's details. Wrex had lifted her up and half laid half dropped half tossed her into it. There had been the hiss as the lid had closed, a muffled drunken flirty, "But Wrex, don't we get to cuddle?" from her followed by a "She's got the hots for you Wrex you ol' smoothie you," from Kaiden followed by a "Heh," from Wrex and then she was waking up six hours later to a pounding headache and a struggle to get her suit to administer hangover remedies.

It had been five minutes of agony in the brain and a watery in the eyes before she was able to muster the strength and courage to get out of the pod. She had staggered to breakfast still coming to grips with her consciousness (not to be confused with conscious) and had sat down at the breakfast table across from Wrex and Joker who was getting his morning coffee for the pilot's chair ready.

"Um Wrex," she had tentatively said. "About last night."

"You were drunk, heh," Said Wrex.

"And cute." He continued.

"And you're a nice bucket head and all," he finished up. "But last night was just letting off steam. We needed that real bad, and you needed to feel like you were part of this, I could tell. So, don't worry about it. Just all in good fun. Glad you enjoyed your meal. But next time if Shepherd takes the tab I'm gonna make his eyes rattle. Hogging all the nicey nicey like that."

Tali had looked around for a tube of nutrient paste.

"Um sorry," began Joker. "Tali? It's Tali, right?"

Tali nodded.

"We only have human food today, last night was the first we heard about you and Garrus joining the team. We've got an order for a six month supply for the two of you. Naturally of course supply is running late. They can't deliver a warehouse load of food without two warehouse loads of paper work and they're only half way through the fifteen billion signatures last time I checked. Paste I'm afraid, but at least it won't be MRE's."

"Taste too dry and they are gummy and chewy," Wrex had grumbled.

"It helps if you add water and heat them in the oven first," suggested Joker.

"Takes too long to do that," Wrex had complained.

"But at least open the bag then?"

"You open the bag?" queried Wrex. "I thought that was it's skin."

"Of course if you have a taste for plastic, who am I to judge? I mean my Arizona cousins eat rattlesnake," concluded Joker.

"What's a rattlesnake?" Tali asked. She found Joker a curious human. He walked very slowly with his legs wide apart, sat down carefully, and this was the first time she had not seen him in his pilot's chair. Unlike Shepherd and Kaiden however, he had that human thick stemmed grassy hair on the lower part of his face. Kaiden and Shepherd seemed to cut theirs off though she didn't know why they bothered since it was clear it was growing back six hours after they had run that little mower over their skin. Joker's hair covered up a lot of the myriad holes which were in the human skin which Tali was having a hard time getting used to. Of course his eyes had that nice faceted colored ring about that little black spot. She noticed that even though Joker and Shepherd had nearly the same color, the two irises were still very much different in the way the colors shifted their hues. For some reason she could not put her finger on, she concluded that Shepherd's eyes were more pleasing.

"Well it's a type of what we call a lizard," began Joker. "Only it has no legs. It slithers on it's belly and is cold blooded. It's just like a politician and found under almost as many rocks. They are polite however in that they tell you they are there so you have a chance to freeze in your tracks and sweat ice cubes. And that makes the rattlesnake happy because it doesn't have to work hard at hitting a moving target with it's inch long fangs and burning acid venom."

"You mean there is something on Earth that actually can kill you while you're trying to eat it?" Wrex was animated. "That is MY kind of planet!"

Tali had absolutely no interest in trying to eat something that was trying to kill her. She would be quite happy with tubes of nutrient paste, thank you. But even so, she couldn't help feeling that Wrex was a nice guy in a 'stomp your fragile face into the cold steel surface of the ship's deck' sort of way.

But her stomach was growling and there was nothing on the ship she could eat without barfing it up in a matter of moments or dying from it. It wouldn't be the first time she had gone without a meal . . . or six.

"I hope the supplies come soon," she thought. "Or simple survival will force me to leave this ship and all these nice people."

Joker took a sip of his coffee and muttered something about there being not enough caffein in it.

"Okay team, listen up!" came Shepherd's voice over the intercom.

Tali had sat up straight and was thankful that the headache from the wine the night before was gone.

"The Captain just informed me that there will be a new council meeting at 0945. All members of my fire team are to suit and arm up and report for duty outside the ship's lock at 0925. We will then move straight to the council chambers where the evidence against Saren will be reviewed and we will wait for orders. Be ready for anything. Shepherd out."

"That's us, bucket buddy!" said Wrex at an animated volume to Tali. "If we're lucky Saren will have a whole ship load of assassins ready to ambush us on the way."

Tali did not hope that there would be anything of the sort, but she was glad Wrex would be there if there was. She clipped on her pistol and headed for the air locker when the ship's quartermaster, Levin, interrupted her.

"Commander's orders," he said as he gave her a nice brand new oiled up shotgun.

"This is too nice a gift I can't possibly . . ." she began.

"Not a gift ma'am," he said. "Standard issue for self defense. Mess it up or abuse it and I have to fix it and I will not hesitate to do something unmentionable to your face. Lose it and your skin will be hanging off my rack to dry and then be sewn into a set of matching lampshades. Do I make myself perfectly clear?"

"Sir, yes sir!" she snapped mimicking Ash's responses to some of Shepherd's orders the day before. She hoped that was what she was supposed to do.

"And I am not your commander. I am your fellow soldier who has ass chewing rights on all weaponry. You do not call me 'sir yes sir,' you say 'thank you' and 'please' and 'I will lovingly treasure the weapons you have given me and will die to protect them from all scratches.'"

"Okay," she said.

"Carry on soldier," he said, saluting her.

She tried to salute him back but she didn't have four fingers to press against each other to produce that finger plane. As a result her two fingers sort of crossed and didn't look at all professional. She was glad she had a visor because she was certain her eyes had gone bright pink from embarrassment.

And that was just the beginning of that first morning. They had gone to the council and Shepherd had been made the first human specter after a brief ceremony. Her heart was pounding during it, she wasn't sure if it was because she felt Shepherd deserved this, or she was a part of it and the fleet would be proud of her. She stood a little straighter afterwards and stopped the little hopping on the balls of her feet thing which she normally reserved for long elevator rides. After all, there were all sorts of people watching the ceremony from the balconies which surrounded the council dais and there were cameras recording the historical event. Some time soon, this recording would reach the fleet and her younger friends not yet going on their pilgrimages would be watching her, and so would her father.

Udina showed absolutely no happiness about the turn of events, which surprised no one. He merely told Anderson that Anderson was now his paper boy and Shepherd was to be given command of the Normandy. Ashley had said something along the lines of "Captain, oh my Captain," which Kaiden grinned about and they returned to the Normandy where the cook informed both her and Garrus that the food had arrived.

Shepherd gave everyone an hour of down time to eat and Tali and Garrus both strode purposefully to the galley where they helped themselves to the myriad tubes of food. There were brown tubes which tasted like old stale meat, green tubes which tasted like old stale vegetables, and white tubes which tasted like old stale tubers. And there was flat water tubes to wash it down with or colored water tubes which pretended to possess some fruit juice additives for flavoring. Tali didn't care, she was starving. Garrus muttered something about already missing the annoying qualities of C-sec paper work because at least there were grocery stores where fresh food could be purchased and the paper work was perfect for wrapping up the leftover fish from last night's meal before throwing them into the waste bins.

Shepherd had apparently spent the hour conferring with Anderson and Udina outside the ship. According to Kaiden, later that evening, Shepherd had protested Anderson's sack but Anderson insisted that it was for the best. It was now Shepherd's job to do right where Anderson had done wrong back when he had been in the running for the first human specter. Shepherd needed the Normandy now, it was the best the Alliance Fleet had, and the best would be needed to track down Saren.

Then Shepherd made a general announcement to the crew. They were going to hunt down Saren, but it would not be easy. But this was humanity's chance to prove to the galaxy that humanity was ready for such responsibility. And the first job they would have would be to deal with Saren's chief associate, the Asari Matriarch Benenzia. She was supposed to have a daughter somewhere in the Artimus Tau cluster. They would be searching there first. Then came the next announcement, the fire team would report to the open area between the sleeping pods and galley for team training. Everyone was to be in full armor with an unloaded pistol and longarm for drill.

Tali picked up her emptied tubes and walked over to the galley and began to wash them.

"My job ma'am," said the cook, who, with sufficient force, removed them from her hands in a manner insistent enough that Tali realized it would be futile to protest.

Kaiden showed up at that point and as Garrus was busy emptying his sniper rifle and checking his sidearm pistol, she walked over the Kaiden who smiled as she approached.

"What is this about drill?" she asked.

"Well you remember that part yesterday about Ashley's butchy ass in the mud?"

"A little," she answered.

"Well your's is going to be joining hers. It's a hard steel floor. But by the time Shepherd is done with you all, you're going to feel like it was mud you were in."

"What about you?" asked Tali.

"Been there, done that, got the t-shirt ripped up from the fans," answered Kaiden. "But if I know Shepherd, he'll be using me as the training dummy."

The words and phrases 'mud' 'ripped' and 'done with' did little to ease the uncertainty.

"This sounds rather, umm, intimidating," suggested Tali.

"That's a good word for it, though Hell's Fires And Chain Saws To The Brain is less of an understatement," answered Kaiden.

Tali's head shifted rapidly from Kaiden, to Garrus, to Ashley with a curiously smug and confidant look upon her face back to Wrex who was just haphazardly pounding his two fists together. She only had sufficient time to gulp once before Shepherd came in with all the volume of a heavy metal band in front of ten thousand screaming fans and the vibrato of two kamikaze dreadnoughts slamming into each other after plowing through an asteroid field.

"All-right team listen up," he shouted. "We are going after one of the deadliest bastards this side of the Persius Veil and that's after he's killed every other badass on the other side. If you are not ready to take him on and every single damned Geth he will be throwing at you before hand, you will get killed and I will be so pissed I will rip your scabby head off your droopy shoulders and drop kick it into the first black hole Joker can find, and that will be AFTER I shove it up your ass!"

Tali gulped. She found herself rapidly rubbing her palms together. She had never experienced the drill training first hand and barely remembered any of the drama vids on the subject from the fleet.

"Do you understand me!" he snapped.

"Sir, Yes, Sir!" snapped Ashley. Garrus and Wrex and Tali just stood there.

"What the hell are you supposed to say?" snarled Shepherd straight into Wrex's face.

Wrex was entirely unintimidated by this behavior from Shepherd. He simply looked back into Shepherd's face and replied. "Oh? Did you say something little man?"

What Shepherd did next nearly caused Tali to metaphorically leap not only out of her suit, but skin and first muscle layer as well. Shepherd grabbed the top of Wrex's head plate, used it to heft his entire body up so that he could bring his knee into Wrex's jaw and jumped back out of Wrex's fists. Wrex bellowed, swung a fist which Shepherd grabbed and pulled forward causing Wrex to fall forward into the hard floor of deck and swivel kicked Wrex's behind for good measure.

"Get off the floor, rocks for brains," shouted Shepherd. "You think it's nappy time for toddlers like you?"

"Raugh!" shouted Wrex as he got up, raised his arms, balled his fists and faced Shepherd . . .

. . . and smiled.

"What did you say?" shouted Shepherd right into his face.

"SIR, YES, SIR!" shouted Wrex right back. He resumed his place in line and kept smiling.

"What the HELL are you looking at BUCKETHEAD?" shouted Shepherd at Tali who was looking at Wrex. She turned to face Shepherd and his entire face filled her visor. Every single pore in his skin was visible and the chaps around the edges of his mouth were starting to crack and bleed on a capillary level.

"I was yust . . ." began Tali her voice cracking.

"You will look at ME at all times! I don't care how ugly you think I look you will ALWAYS look at me do I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR?"

"Um . . ."

"I said GEEK FOR BRAINS YOU WILL LOOK AT ME AT ALL TIMES DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!?"

"Sir, yes, sir!" whimpered Tali.

"YOU THINK SAREN IS GOING TO GIVE YOU A LITTLE FLORAL HANKY FOR YOUR TEARS WHINY GIRL?"

"SIR, Yes, SIR!" Screamed Tali. This was followed by a "Whift Whift Whift" from her visor cleaner system.

"YOU THINK HE'S GOING TO GIVE YOU A FLORAL HANKIE?!"

Tali could hear Ashley smirk.

Tali was shaking. She didn't know to do. Shepherd's head was almost all she could, see, every single hair follicle breaking out of the skin, every single blackhead, every single pore, every single flake of skin, but behind Shepherd's head was Kaiden mouthing a 'Sir, No, Sir'. Then she understood.

"SIR, NO, SIR! (wift wift wift).

"Damn straight bucket head," snapped Shepherd.

Tali was upset, angry, grieving, and thinking about the horrible things she would do to him once she got over this. The transformation from a friendly buy you dinner make you feel like part of a team you are going to be so valuable to me to a snarling insulting head slapping butt kicking sneering in your face screaming at the top of your lungs beast was more than she could handle. Ashley was enjoying this. Tali was certain she was.

Garrus was being given the riot act but that was over in a matter of seconds. Tali kept her entire vision on Shepherd for fear of him yelling at her again so when he got into Ashley's face, Tali was entirely focused.

Ashley knew what was going down. She had endured nine weeks of this back in Marine boot camp, and she proved more than capable of handling everything Shepherd threw at her. He even flipped the questions around in a deliberate effort to get her to answer yes when she needed to answer no, but she was on him every time and got it right. Tali's anger was so intense that she barely caught that Shepherd was throwing more at Ashley than he had thrown at Wrex, Garrus, and her combined. And yet Ashley kept her eyes focused on Shepherd, answered at the top of her lungs correctly each time, and remained perfectly at ramrod attention.

It just . . . wasn't . . . fair.

"Now," said Shepherd in a softer, but still demanding tone. "Are you wusses ready to learn how to survive in a gun fight with the Geth?"

"SIR, YES, SIR!" all four of them shouted at once, followed by yet another "RAUGH!" from Wrex.

"DID I GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO GROWL, ROCKHEAD?" screamed Shepherd.

"SIR, NO, SIR!" screamed Wrex back.

Behind Shepherd, Kaiden remained with a little grin on his face. Shortly thereafter he was joined by Joker and the XO Pressley who leaned on the walls by the galley watching. Pressley helped himself to a glass of water with ice and Joker seemed to have found a stick of something meaty. He was taking tiny bites of it and gently chewing each one while he watch the proceedings grinning and exchanging knowing looks with Pressley.

"Blue!" snapped Shepherd. "Forward so these girls can see you."

Kaiden stepped up and placed himself between the four and Shepherd. He was at ramrod attention facing all four of them but he had that gentle smile upon his face that Tali was beginning to draw strength from.

"Now," continued Shepherd walking circles around Kaiden as he spoke. "Blue here is at the center of a clock. This is his Twelve."

Shepherd pointed right in front of Kaiden. Then moved slightly to the left, and continued to take small steps to the left until he was behind Kaiden and then proceeded around Kaiden's left as he advanced. All the time he continued to shout numbers.

"This is his one! This is his two. This is his three. This is his four!"

And so on through to 12 where once again Shepherd was standing in front of Kaiden.

"When I say, 'Your One' you WILL face your one. You will DO THIS because I SAID SO. Once you face the number I call, you had better NOTICE what's in front of you because if you don't IT WILL KILL YOU DEAD and you think I'm a bastard now? Wait until you see me when I'm PISSED OFF BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAD!"

"Alright," continued Shepherd. "Blue here will now perform on cue because he's proven he is a real soldier and not a pack of wusses like you losers."

"Blue, Pistol!"

Kaiden drew his pistol and aimed it directly in front of him staring down the barrel. Suddenly Tali knew why Shepherd had commanded that all weapons be emptied. A pulled trigger in the stress of the pressure and someone goes home in a body bag. Kaiden's smile was so subtle that Tali could barely make it out.

"Blue your Two! Blue to Four! Blue your Six! Blue to Eight! Blue your Ten! Blue to Twelve!"

Kaiden's whole body danced to the chant and each number led him to face a new direction going around the clock. It was so graceful that Tali was mesmerized.

"How can he do that when his legs can only bend one way?" she thought.

The numbers got more jumbled and Kaiden performed on cue, turning this way and then flipping to his opposite and then shifting almost to the right but not enough yet exactly where he was supposed to face. And it went on and on and on until Tali wondered why Kaiden didn't just collapse on the floor.

Then Shepherd ordered, "At ease Blue." And Kaiden straightened up, holstered his pistol, and walked back to behind Shepherd.

"Okay, we're going to see if the Marines know how to train their soldiers," said Shepherd. "Little Girl Ashley? Your code talk name is Ash."

"Sir, Thank You, Sir," barked Ashley.

"Ash, Longarm!"

"Sir? Assault, Shotgun, Machine Pistol, Sniper, Sir?"

"Ash, Assault!" snapped Shepherd.

During this time, Dr. Chakwas had joined the gang along with Engineer Adams. Two other crew members were also around. It was as if they were on display . . . Or was it.

Tali scanned the crowd, very carefully while Shepherd was sending Ashley through the same sort of dance that Kaiden had been put through. Her head would be screamed off if Shepherd caught her looking at anything other than Ashley. But in her sudden gentle shifts of her head she was able to notice the crew who were watching. It seemed to her that while there was some entertainment value in what Shepherd was putting them through, there was also a sort of initiation rite quality to the entire affair. It was as if they had gone through something like she was going through and there was, in the eyes of all of them, a certain, "Come on, you can do it girl," gaze. It helped her stop shaking. But only for an all to brief moment.

For Ashley was more than capable in the dance of the numbers. She pirouetted, pivoted, shifted and about faced with even more grace than Kaiden. And all the while looking down her rifle with steel in her eyes. Tali had no doubt that if she ever ended up in Ash's sights in battle, Tali would be dead in an instant. That made her start to tremble again.

"Looks like the Marine is almost as good as the Army," barked Shepherd.

"Sir, Thank You, Sir," snapped Ashley. She kept a straight face in spite of Kaiden's sniggers.

"BUCKETHEAD GEEK!" snapped Sheperd right in Talis's visor.

"Sir! Yes, Sir!"

"Your code name is DUCK."

"Sir, thank you, Sir!" answered Tali. Her whole body was trembling.

"Duck! Longarm!"

Tali had been so rattled by this that she grabbed her shotgun before she even knew what he meant by longarm. She suddenly realized she did exactly what he wanted her to do without thinking.

"You going to just hold that weapon like a girly purse or are you going to use it to kill Geth?" shouted Shepherd.

Tali leaped and aimed it.

"Duck your three! Duck your seven! Duck your eight! BANG! YOU'RE DEAD, DUCK!"

She had gone to nine and not eight.

"Duck your ten! To four! To seven! To six! To nine!"

"In your dreams, Commander," snarked Joker.

Every one of the audience was laughing.

"What! What! What! Why are they laughing?" thought Tali frantically.

And so it went. Tali was put through the paces. Then came Garrus, who was given the code name Bugs, which prompted Dr. Chakwas to say, "Nyahh, what's up doc? Tch Tch Tch" much to the amusement of everyone watching. Then it was Wrex's turn, and his code name was Bull. And then it was back to her.

For the next hour it was drill. Followed by drill, with intermittent drill, and ending with drill. After a five minute break there was drill. And then drill. And then more drill. Then a review of drill, followed by a recap of drill. Then there was a preamble of tomorrow's drill, with drill, and then more drill, and finally, drill.

And all the while Shepherd shouted, stamped, pushed, insulted, and drove them to exhaustion. But the worst moment was when Tali's suit scrubber kicked in.

"Thumph, Thumph, Thumph," went her suit, somewhat quietly but loud enough for Shepherd to hear it..

"What the HELL WAS THAT, DUCK!" Shepherd was once again entirely in her face and all she could see through his visor was a sneering mouth, flacky skin on the end of a nose, bits of facial hair missed by the shaver, and all those pores in the skin.

"Sir, My Suit Scrubber," began Tali shaking.

"BANG! YOUR DEAD, DUCK, AND BULL, AND BUGS, AND ASH!" shouted Shepherd. "You just KILLED THE WHOLE TEAM, DUCK!"

"YOU WILL BE QUIET AT ALL TIMES, DUCK. YOU WILL SWEAT, DUCK. YOU WILL PISS IN YOUR SUIT, DUCK. YOU WILL SMELL LIKE SHIT, DUCK. BUT YOU WILL MAKE NO NOISE BECAUSE IF YOU DO THE GETH HEAR YOU AND KILL YOU! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR OR DO YOU NEED THE COLORING BOOK BACK?"

"Sir, NO, Sir! (Whift Whift Whift)"

The drill ended at supper time and Shepherd retired to the captain's quarters. The door behind him closed and slid shut and gave all indications that it was to remain closed. Then Pressley came by with a vid which he broadcast above the dinner hall while an exhausted Garrus, Wrex, Ashley, and Tali tried to eat and drink before falling into their sleeping pods. Kaiden of course was there as well giving them moral 'pick you ups'.

"You're on the news tonight, kids. Enjoy the fame."

The news announcer appeared on the white screen above the dining table, "And in tonight's news we give you a piece of history in the making, the first human specter, John Michael Shepherd, was appointed to the position by the council after he revealed that a Turian Specter, Saren, was responsible for coordinating a Geth attack on Eden Prime . . ."

The camera panned to the council going through the ritual, focusing primarily on the Asari's part of the ceremony.

"With the Commander were several team members . . ."

The news vid with through Kaiden's history, his accomplishments and valor. And then spoke at length about Ashley's military history and family and her former unit, the well decorated 212. Then Garrus was on the screen and his history in C-sec, along with his numerous commendations was next mentioned.

"Only appropriate I suppose," mused Garrus.

"And also with the team were a Quarian and Krogan," continued the News caster. "And now for our analysis of the importance of this new development, we . . ."

"A Quarian and Krogan," rumbled Wrex. "Nice that we were at least noticed."

"You're the daughter of one of the Fleet's admirals right?" Asked Kaiden incredulous.

"Well yes, but," began Tali.

"That is so . . ." he waved his arms. "God, I hate the news some days."

"Really," protested Tali, who was secretly pleased that the camera had in fact caught her standing there with the rest of team.

"No I agree with Kaiden," said Garrus raising his hand to silence Tali. "While my accomplishments are pretty sterling, they did need to point out that it was your work which made Shepherd's appointment possible. Your skill at hacking that Geth, Tali, is the thing which was directly responsible for his appointment."

Tali didn't know what to say about that, except, "Thank you Garrus."

"All in a day's work for your friendly humble paladin Turian," replied Garrus. "Scratch the humble. When you're that good, calling yourself humble is just a silly lie."

By the end of the third day's drill, Tali was convinced she was in the Quarian equivalent of hell. She staggered to the table after finding a couple of stale tasting tubes to stop the gnawing sensation of hunger in her stomach. Shepherd would not let them break for lunch. He had yelled "Bang! Your dead, Duck!" so many times she had her funeral arrangements already worked out in her head. She was firmly convinced that long before they confronted Saren, she would get shot, and be a bloody corpse in a body bag sent back to the migrant fleet with with a little note from Shepherd which would say, "It is with great relief to report to you that this Buckethead Duck Tali'Zoriah nar Rayya was too stupid to fight and survive against the ultimate badass Saren."

"Hey Tali," said Kaiden, in his soft tenor voice. "Sit here next to me. You need a hug."

Tali didn't ask, she didn't think, she just sat with a 'whumph' next to Kaiden who put his arm around her and held her gently.

"Stupid Bosh'tet," she grumbled. "I thought he liked me."

"He does," replied Kaiden.

"Funny," she groused. "I didn't know humans expressed fondness by calling you names while screaming their spit all over your visor not to mention making you work in your own excrement. I've run my suit scrubber three times since the end of drill and I still don't feel clean."

"Let me tell you about Jenkins," answered Kaiden.

"Yenkins?" She had heard the name and something associated with him being dead.

"He died on Eden Prime, the first casualty of the Geth," continued Kaiden. "I think we told you about him the first night."

Tali signed and absently worked on her food tube. The first night with the steak dinner and that wonderful wine seemed ages ago.

"You would never have known it phased Shepherd, "continued Kaiden. "He was calm and collected and professional during debriefing, but afterwards I saw him start to climb into one of the access vents."

Tali looked up at Kaiden.

Wrex walked by, paused to see Tali next to Kaiden with his arm around her shoulder and nodded to them.

"Humans rule, Krogan's drool," suggested Kaiden with a 'got her this chapter dude' grin on his face.

Wrex chuckled and shook his head.

"Can't wait for live ammo drills," he said. And walked off to the sleeping pod bay.

"Now what's this about the vents?" asked Tali. "I don't imagine it was to check a lubrication system for leaks."

"It was a quiet private place to bawl his head off," answered Kaiden very slowly. "I could hear him even twenty feet into the vent."

Tali just sat there. This made no sense to her.

"He's going to put you all through hell so you become the best team members he can have," continued Kaiden. "Because he can't stand the thought of losing anyone. He's doing everything he can to make sure we get out of this alive."

"But couldn't he at least show his nice side after drill? He makes me feel like I'm going to be dead in a just a few days because I can't do anything right and then we don't see him any more. He was so nice the first night."

"Oh you'll see that again," said Kaiden. "After you pass. Until then, he's Mr. Jerk with the spiky club to beat you over the head and sandpaper stick to shove up your, umm, well you get the idea. Once you 'make it;' and don't worry Tali, you will make it, then you'll see the nice steak dinner for the team guy."

"How can you be so sure I'll make it, Kaiden," she asked. She leaned against his chest and found his steady breathing relaxing.

"Because he won't quit until you do," said Kaiden.

"Huh? Me? Why?"

"He needs you, Tali," said Kaiden. "And I'm not thinking it's just because you're the team geek. You kind of remind him of the nice things he's fighting for. Hell, you also remind me and Garrus of the nice things back home; quiet hearths, relaxing couches, good books to read, and a mug of cold beer. Don't ask me to explain why because I have no way to do it. And don't even begin to ask me why Wrex likes you because I can't find a thing about you which makes me think of psychotics."

Kaiden shrugged and settled himself down so Tali could lean better on his shoulder. "Why do you think Ash is so hostile to you? She's jealous. She was 'the girl' on her force in the 212 and she was expecting to be 'the girl' in our team and with Garrus and Wrex, it was all smooth sailing. Now don't get me wrong, she's going to be a soldier's soldier, but she likes the guys being honey syrup on her. You stepped in and all she's getting is yesterday's cold clam chowder. That's why she's always so smug about doing it right no matter how much Shepherd throws at her. And he knows she's showing off. Which is why he's ragging on her in the drills so much. He's trying to push her past her limit if he can, and she knows if he can't do that, she's the better soldier and that 'proves' she's better than you."

"She doesn't have to prove anything to me, stupid bosh'tet. I know I'm not the soldier. I'm an enyineer."

"I didn't say it had to make sense," answered Kaiden.

Tali had to admit that when it was all said and done, Shepherd was throwing an awful lot more at Ashley than he was throwing at Garrus and her. Only Wrex got as much rag as Ashley and Wrex just got more enthusiastic with the pressure. It was no secret that Wrex was reveling in the fact that he was becoming a better soldier, a better team mate, a more dangerous adversary.

"The more I train! The bigger bugs I get to trample! The bigger guns I get to carry! The more Geth I get to kill!" he had roared at the end of a particularly grueling drill session.

Tali simply was silent for a moment. Kaiden continued to give her his shoulder. It made her feel warm and comfortable. But she did not for a moment imagine this was a come on. He simply liked her and was doing what he could to make her get through another evening so she could get through another drill day tomorrow.

And she needed it. It helped her get through the day after as well.

Back to the present. Still lying in her sleeping pod. Still not falling asleep. Wide awake and thinking about what Kaiden had said two nights ago and comparing it to this morning's events.

The drill had been hard and fast and nasty. Shepherd was snapping their code names off fast and screaming "BANG YOU'RE DEAD, ASH/DUCK/BUGS/BULL." every second it seemed. Then, twenty minutes into the drill, a set of complicated orders found her staring down her shotgun at Ashley while Garrus was staring down his sniper rifle at Wrex but Wrex had his back to Garrus. Shepherd lit into Wrex because Wrex had supposed to have been looking down the barrel of his assault rifle at Garrus. Tali knew this because she had reached the point that she was aware of the location of every single team member and their facing. Every team member had to know this, or someone would die from friendly fire.

Then Ashley's gun 'clicked'.

"Oops," whispered Ashley with a grin which possessed a side order of sneer. "Accidentally pulled the trigger. Good thing I remembered to unload this gun or you would be dead."

Tali was trembling with a mixture of rage and fear when suddenly Shepherd was right there.

"Ash!" he snapped "Ten' Shun!"

Ash was, of course, at attention, and Shepherd was at her face.

"Did you pull the trigger while pointing your Assault at Duck?"

"Sir, No, Sir!"

"That Bosh'tet!" thought Tali. "Lying little Bosh'tet!"

"I said, Ash, did you pull your trigger on Duck?"

"Sir, No, Sir!"

Tali was looking down her shot gun for Shepherd had not given the 'at ease' order or a new command to face. She could see Ashley's eye's twitching under the gaze of Shepherd's. Ashley was doing her best to keep meeting Shepherd's gaze, for to shift her eyes away would betray the fact that she was lying. She was, in Tali's mind, practically succeeding.

"Ash! I said! Did you pull your trigger at all?"

"Sir, NO, Sir!"

"At ease Ash," said Shepherd and turned away, entirely not facing her.

A sly grin spread across Ash's face as she relaxed.

Then Shepherd's fist came around and hit Ashley right in the temple knocking her flat on that 'butchy' ass.

"Don't you EVER! And I mean EVER! LIE TO ME, ASH!"

"Don't any of you EVER think you're smarter than me!" he snarled. "NEVER!"

"Sir, yes sir!" shouted all four of them. Even now Ashley was already up and at attention. She was just that damn good a soldier.

Tali wanted to cry. But she knew that was not a good thing to do at this juncture and choose not to. And since that was her decision, it didn't happen. But she knew what had just happened. It wasn't that serious an incident in the overall scheme of things. Ash had just taken the opportunity to be a bit snarky and take out a little resentment in a way that Tali would feel it. And Shepherd had seen it and come to her defense. Probably because it would affect team moral, probably because such behavior left unchecked would jeopardize the missions they would be performing, but still, he had done it.

Somehow, that little gesture had made her feel like perhaps Kaiden had been right. Perhaps Shepherd really was doing this to save her from death. Perhaps it was because he actually cared about her, at least as much as he cared about anyone else, and that's all she really wanted, acceptance.

But even now, after that good feeling that somehow, it was going to be alright, after supper, after she had crawled into the pod feeling like her entire body had been shaken out and strapped to the stomach of a charging buffalo in the middle of a mile wide herd of charging buffalos, she still couldn't get to sleep. She lay there.

The ship was silent.

"bzzzzzzz snark bzzzzzz snark," Wrex was starting to snore in the pod next to her.

She fell asleep. And before she knew it, the wake up call was sounding and she was tumbling out of her bed and getting ready for breakfast.

She finished breakfast, did her best to relieve herself and get her suit all scrubbed so she wouldn't have to feel so rancid the whole drill and they all fell in and once again Shepherd was shouting, screaming, ordering, commanding and she was switching weapons, producing her omni tool, facing her six or her twelve, moving three steps nine, ducking Garrus's swinging sniper rifle and suddenly Shepherd was in her sights, his back to her. And in Ashley's sights, and Garrus' scope, and being faced down by Wrex. All four of them were aiming down a central point with Shepherd standing at that point.

He smiled.

"Yeah Baby, Yeah!" shouted Joker and the rest of the crew that was watching the spectacle began to clap and cheer.

Before Tali could fully grasp what was happening, Shepherd walked forwards to Wrex and gave his scalp bone a buff rub with his palm, something which Tali had discoverd two nights before made Krogan happy, a gesture of comradeship.

"Congratulations, Wrex,' said Shepherd smiling. "You are now the best damn scary Krogan Point a Specter could ask for. I am proud to have you on the team."

"Don't you even think of kissing me, Commander," said Wrex grinning. He holstered his weapon and began to beat his fists together.

Shepherd turned to his right and walked to Garrus, taking his hand and pumping it.

"Congratulations Garrus, you are now the best Wing Sniper a Specter could hope for. I'm proud to have you on my team."

"Well naturally this was bound to happen," said Garrus.

"And all those times you dropped your rifle?" queried Shepherd grinning.

"Merely gestures on my part to make you feel like you mattered," replied Garrus with only the slightest twitch of his mandibles. "And thanks to Tali's skilled engineering, I was able to drop it way more than I could have afforded to otherwise."

Under her visor, Tali smiled. Garrus had been so embarrassed when he had asked her to straighten the barrel the first time he had slammed it's side into a strut he was standing by during the drills. And now he owed her six fancy restaurant of her choice dinners for all the times he had bent or scarred that gun.

"Let's see," teased Tali after the last repair to his rifle. "For the first time it will be Ryuusei's Sushi, and the second time Ryuusei's Sushi, then for the third time I think I'll pick Ryuusei's Sushi and for the fourth time I will be in the mood for Ryuusei's Sushi and then for the fifth time, we'll have a change of pace and go to Ryuusei's Sushi, and for the best and last time, I think Ryuusei's Sushi would suit us well don't you think?"

"You're a cruel and wicked Quarian," gasped Garrus. "But I'm alright with that."

Shepherd had turned to his right and walked over to Ashley, and hugged her.

"Congratulations, Ashley, you are now the best Wing-girl a Specter could want."

"Was there any doubt, Skipper?" replied Ashley.

"Only every time I told you there was," replied Shepherd grinning.

"Which was never," observed Ashley grinning back. She saluted.

Shepherd turned to his right and started walking towards Tali.

Tali's heart started to beat rapidly. How could he come this close? How could he hug her? She was hot, sweaty, certain she stank to high heaven. And there his arms were around her and giving her a good solid hug.

"Congratulations Tali," he said. "You are now the best Combat Engineer a Specter could hope for. I'm proud to have you on my team."

"Thank you . . . Shepherd," was all she could say.

Shepherd put himself on the ship's PA.

"This is Commander Shepherd. There are two announcements which are to be made. The first is that we have finished the final training of Team Specter, from henceforth, all members of team Specter have the informal rank of Lieutenant. Comport yourselves accordingly. Second, as a gesture of congratulations to the team, a beer barrel will be broken out tonight at dinner and all crew are invited. Shepherd out."

The second announcement went over well with the crew for they were already cheering before Shepherd was finished. Tali sighed. She and Garrus would have to watch from the sidelines since the beer would be levo and unsafe for her and Garrus.

And so there was a brief break period for the team to wash and wax as it were and Tali was feeling much better (and cleaner) when the beer barrel was broken out and everyone was laughing and joking and spreading rumors as to which of the Artimus Tau systems they would begin exploring in the next six hours. Apparently they had been in sector for six earth days, but so far the dig site they were looking for had not yet been determined. Tali had been so absorbed in trying to survive Shepherd's Team Specter drill that she had not realized that they had flown halfway across the galaxy.

Then Garrus put his hand on her shoulder and when she turned around, he put a tube of what smelled to be Turian Brandy in her hand.

"I knew there would be nights like this, and so I stashed a little something away for the occasion," he said. He lifted up a small bottle which clearly contained the same liquid. "Cheers Tali, and don't forget, you haven't let me snuggle you yet like Wrex or Kaiden. Hopefully this little of bottle fun will clear the way like some cheesy Fleet and Flotilla episode would have us believe."

Tali's eyes were shifting to a very bright pink, which was for the most part obscured by the visor.

"Just fooling of course," continued Garrus grinning, which on a Turian consisted in letting everyone see the two rows of needle sharp teeth in all their impaling glory. "My money is on Shepherd getting you in the end."

"Keelah," she groaned. "There isn't a pool is there?"

"Not yet," replied Garrus. "Give it a successful mission or two and people knowing us enough to start to make things up about us and sound like they actually know what they are talking about and then the speculation will run rampant."

"Garrus," she said. "After all the screaming in my face, that up close and personal view I have had of all those skin pores and blackheads and pimples and missed stubble from the shaving and nose hairs. What makes anyone think I would want to bond with him, let alone really like him? This is a human we are talking about. We can't even eat the same food, and love making would kill me."

"Ah yes," mused Garrus. "The ultimate turn of phrase in which has you going while he comes."

Tali tilted her head.

"It's um," Garrus tried to shift a half dozen invisible intangible bowling balls from his right to left hand. "Never mind, my mandibles twist just trying to think of how to explain it without your eyes exploding."

"Well if you are going to describe it that way, I don't think I want an explanation."

"You don't," Garrus assured her. "Trust me you don't."

"Me and Shepherd (hic)," she thought as she struggled to get one of her legs into the sleeping pod an hour and a half later. "Stupid bosh'tet idea, especially (hics) when Garrus is so cute when he tries to get me drunk (hic)."

True to his speculation, Garrus had gotten some snuggle time since he was the one with the Turian brandy; which was easier to pour into her tube when she was sitting next to him. As close as possible so none could be accidentally spilled of course. He even got a Quarian kiss, the top of her visor touching his forehead.

She tried the other leg, which was less successful since it was farther way from the pod than the first. She hiccuped a few more times and then leaned towards the sleep pod, and tried to belly crawl into it. That brandy had really gone to her head, especially after the third tube of it. There was of course a detox program in her suit which would work to scrub the alcohol out of her system but she had to consciously activate it, something she was forgetting about given her present inebriation.

Then some soft and gentle hands helped her get in. And closed the lid with a hiss as she said, "Than (hiccup hic hiccup) ksssssss." Then she was fast asleep.

The bay was to dark for anyone to see that it was John Michael Shepherd who walked away from the sleeping pod shaking his head and trying not to smile to much.


	3. Chapter 3 - First Mission

It was the evening of September 25th, Earth time, enforced by light/dark shifts on the Normandy so that the crew would have a sense of day and night. Everyone worked an 8 on, 16 off shift but that usually translated into 16 hours of work or mostly work with some eating and the mandatory 8 hour sleep pod rest. Commander John Michael Shepherd was busy working on the report he would need to submit to the council. While a brief communication holographic face to face was nice, the full report would need to include all the details. He was in the captain's cabin on the second deck. It contained a single bed, desk, and locker and closet. It was the most luxurious room on the ship.

John paused looking at his screen while his fingers rested lightly on the keyboard. It had been one of those missions which could have gone better, but also gone far far worse.

It was the first time the team had all gone on the Mako.

"Okay team," he had begun that morning. "This is it. The first time we work as a team. This is the Mako. We will be using it to travel from site to site on-surface. While each of you will have an assignment on foot, in the Mako, there are only a few assignments.

"Ash? As Wing-girl, you will be driving. Don't be afraid to abuse it a bit, it's built to handle one or two direct hits from most weaponry and take it with the shields."

"Sir!" she snapped.

"BUT!" he continued. "We don't Scary Krogan with the Mako. Once we are under fire your first job is to take cover so the shields can recharge. Don't be afraid to jump and bang and slam your way into the cover, got it?"

Ashley nodded. From what Shepherd had just told her, the Mako was simply an extension of her, fast, light, armored enough to take a few hits while moving, designed to hit hard the first time but not just sit there and pound.

"Duck? As Engineer your job is to sit behind Ash and monitor the engine, shields, and energy drains on life support and gun use."

"Got it commander."

"Bugs? You get the big gun to shoot at things which are far away. And closer if they move fast enough."

"Commander, you do the sweetest things for me," replied Garrus with the Turian equivalent of a smile.

"Bull? You're job is to be by the door so that you are the first thing out killing anything that's made the mistake of trying to attack us."

"Sounds dull for the most part Shepherd, but I suppose once we are on foot I will have more fun."

"Fun is not the word I would have used," mused Ashley.

"Blue? Your job in the Mako will be to apply biotics to cushion any falls should the crew get knocked about by a serious hit."

"Right, Shepherd," replied Kaiden.

"Ash? I'll be your co-pilot and recon, sitting on your right."

"Got it skipper. So you're the one who reads the map and passes over the bottled water?"

Shepherd nodded.

"You do understand, Commander," continued Ashley grinning. "That the pilot gets the choice of music?"

John groaned. "Maybe I should drive," he half threatened half mused.

"NOAshleywilldofine!" gulped Kaiden.

Tali looked at Kaiden who proceeded to make a little circle around his ear with his index finger, slapped his hip with the flat of his palm, and then pantomimed driving. She tilted her head. Kaiden leaned in and whispered "Crazy badass driver."

"Oh," she said back and giggled. It was a curious hooting sort of laugh though gentile and delicate.

Shepherd turned around from his seat and looked at the two of them. Kaiden leaned back and grinned while Tali just looked back at Shepherd with her eyes tinged just a bit pink.

Joker's job was to land the Mako as close to the dig that they could on the planet Therum. The heavy volcanism of the site made dropping the Mako close pretty much impossible so they had landed about six kilometers away and had driven between lakes of burning lava or by jagged flats left by cold lava from previous eruptions.

And the Geth were there in force the whole way.

Ashley was a good blend of both skill and crazy given that she had to drive, under fire, down narrow corridors of solid jagged rock between lakes of boiling lava. Several tires managed to catch fire but were extinguished by Tali's swift engineering. There was one particular narrow gap exactly 145 meters long where Ashley fired the right jets causing the Mako to drive at a 45 degree angle enabling it to speed down the narrow passage without getting stuck.

"You're right, Shepherd!" shouted Garrus during one very heavy firefight. "They ARE easier to hit when you pretend they are country western singers."

"WHAT!" screamed Ashley.

"Oh? I thought that was on the pri-com channel to Shepherd!" answered Garrus. As his seat was elevated and he was in the back dome behind the gun, no one could see his facial or mandible expressions.

"I like this music you silly tooree bosh'tet!" shouted Tali.

"Please God not TWO of them!" cried Shepherd.

"Now that's getting personal," shouted Garrus who apparently knew the meaning of the Khelish word tooree. From now on, it's ducky Quarian engineers I'm shooting at."

"Until I yack that gun to spit it's gas in your face!" threatened Tali.

"No gas spitting!" shouted Shepherd sternly. "If he misses a shot you can die! Got it?"

"Sorry," answered Tali, slightly shaken more by the point Shepherd was making as opposed to the very large explosion erupting nearby. Shepherd had clearly reminded her that they were playing a very dangerous game with the Geth. Of course she had been joking, and she suspected Shepherd knew it too, but the reminder was important.

They rolled up a hill and at the last second Ashley twirled the Mako around so that the rear of the vehicle faced the hill where installed rigging suggested an entrance into an underground complex. The back door flew up and Wrex roared out, followed by Kaiden with bio-shields up to protect them both.

Next came Garrus and Tali, then Shepherd and Ashley emerged.

"Ash eleven flank forward, Bugs one flank high ground, Bull nine, Blue Duck six," he commanded.

They moved forward, a square of four in the center with two out in front wide apart.

"Looks clear," suggested Ashley, dashing from boulder to boulder and moving among the tall girders and pylons on the edge of the construction.

"Wait," said Garrus. "Hopper plastered on the top strut and those lizards are not stupid. He's seen us I'm sure. Prepare for hostiles."

Suddenly a Geth drop ship roared over the horizon and in three minutes had reached their 20, dropping seven hostiles, the center one being an Armature.

"Heavy Metal," snapped Shepherd and began snapping code talk orders.

For the next three minutes Kaiden kept himself, Tali, Shepherd, and Wrex under a biotic protection while Shepherd and Wrex kept up the fire trying to pin down as many of the Geth as possible while Garrus and Ashley moved into position. Then with a set of quick commands, the team set out to take out the Armature by a combination of harassment, sabotage, and heavy fire from the front.

From the left, Ashley persisted in ducking, running, and firing at the back of the Armature distracting it from the pounding it was being given from the front. Garrus, from the right, gently squeezed the trigger when ever he got a Armature sensor array between his crosshairs. Once the first shot from Garrus scored, Shepherd and Wrex advanced firing while Kaiden began to lift small rocks from within the Armature's shielding and jammed them into the joints while Tali attacked each Geth with small interference hacks.

The effect of this is best examined from the mind of the Armature. As the Armature saw the Shepherd and Wrex charging, it proceeded to bring it's weapon to bear only to have its chief sensor array go out. It tried to bring up a secondary system but knew something was wrong because what was sensed was a stage, filled with little fat blond haired blue eyed boys in white shirts, string bow ties, leather suspenders and leiderhosen singing, "Mein hut er hat drei ekka, drei ekka hat mein hut." Guessing sabotage it ordered the other Geth platforms to engage Shepherd and Wrex while it sought to engage the irritation on it's rear which was beginning to damage it's two rear legs. The first Geth objected on the grounds that the first law of robotics prohibited it from allowing a human to come to harm. The second Geth objected on the grounds that Will Robinson was in danger. The third Geth objected with scattered whistles and beeps on the grounds that it had a mission from a princess involving secret plans. The fourth Geth objected on the grounds that it was feeling terribly depressed and had a pain going down it's diodes on the side. The fifth Geth objected on the grounds that there was a risk of violating the Prime Directive and Captain Picard would need to give clearance first. But the sixth Geth insisted that it's consensus was titled Iago Montoya and the Armature had destroyed it's parental platform and was now required to make preparations for initiating memory core wipe. It was at this point that it lost the full function of one of it's rear legs, it's main weapon was jammed and unable to swing to the right, and there was a Krogan head butting it's front. And as it sought to bring up secondary programs, it was required first to deny that it wanted to buy a cruise on Virmire, and then had to cancel an order for two dozen yogurt flavored umbrellas. In frustration, it died.

The remaining Geth were swiftly dispatched after that.

"Clear!" chirped Ashley.

"Bag 'em 'n tag 'em," chuckled Kaiden.

"Roll," called out Shepherd, skipping Ashley and Kaiden since they already had spoken indicating they were okay.

"Bull?"

"Shepherd," answered Wrex.

"Bugs?"

"Commander?" answered Garrus.

"Duck?"

"Quack."

John Michael Shepherd had to switch off his com for a second because he was suddenly suffering from an attack of the giggles. Tali had imitated a Duck call perfectly. It might have been just the stress which comes from engaging in deadly combat. It might have just been the worries of the team operating for the first time and fear of losing someone. But he had a sneaking suspicion that the real reason was that Tali had once again pulled the cute gene out and hit him square amidships.

"Commander?" came Ashley's query.

"Just a sec (smurfing noises from trying to suppress laughter) second," he replied.

"You okay?" she asked.

(More smurfing noises before a "I'm fine.")

"You're sounding kind of . . . funny."

"You are hearing correctly," he replied. There was nothing like the truth in situations like this.

"I don't understand," she insisted.

"You actually do," he replied.

"Oh I give up!"

"Never surrender Ash, never surrender," he finished grinning.

Now seated at his desk, that evening, Shepherd smiled as he wrote a brief report of the combat with the Armature, leaving out the duck calls and his chuckles and concluding with '. . . the team performed at a level of professionalism which secured the area with no casualties.'

The encounter with Liara was the next notable thing about the mission. She had been found at the bottom of the ruin, suspended spread eagle in a security force field. There was something very sweet and gentle about her face that Kaiden immediately picked up.

"Whoa," whistled Kaiden. "We have a really cute Asari doing a classic Da Vinci pose here."

"Can you help me? I'm trapped!" cried Liara.

"Why am I not surprised?" queried Garrus. "It seems that the cuter they are, the more compromised their safety."

"Are you saying she's cuter than me?" chimed in Ashley and Tali almost simultaneously.

"Oh by the spirits," groaned Garrus. "Only you two would think that your narrow escapes were not narrow escapes."

"It's the nature of women to interpret the statement that another women looks cute to mean that they are not," suggested Kaiden. "Even if our little marine was looking really sweet and lovable while running with her tush on fire."

"It was NOT ON FIRE!" snapped Ashley.

"Let us have peace among us," suggested Shepherd with his back to the party in order to hide the grin. "And figure out how to rescue the distressed blue damsel."

"Rescue first, cat fight after," agreed Garrus.

Ashley and Tali looked at each other, one rolling her eyes and the other doing a helmet palm. Should the gentle reader not know who did what, they are in danger of flunking English Lit.

"While I appreciate the flattery," suggested Liara. "I would appreciate you disabling this Prothean security device more."

It was Wrex who figured out the idea of using the mining laser to dig under Liara's position and come up from behind; partially because it involved a big red hot beam destroying large chunks of rock, but mostly because it was the only practical idea that was accessible. Shepherd insisted on pushing the buttons.

"Hogging all the fun," grumbled Wrex.

Having rescued Liara would have been the natural end of the mission, but there was one more firefight while the volcano, mysteriously dormant all those tens of thousands of years while the Protheans had built into it, unleashed massive energies in, over, and around it, and then left it abandoned, decided to let a single mining laser blast trigger a lava boil, but not until right after the final firefight.

"I am getting sick and tired of being thrown into mission assignments which remind me of cheap adolescent Citadel Specter Vids!" screamed a desperately running Garrus as he ducked one bit of falling rock after another.

Thanks to Shepherd's quick orders to Joker, the Normandy was hovering by the exit ramp so the seven of them could leap into it's safety. The ship shot away just as the first geyser of molten orange yellow rock leapt into the air like an incinerating fountain and commenced the burial of the archeological dig.

"There goes the Mako," groaned Shepherd as the lava flowed around the vehicle igniting the tires and setting off the fuel into a massive explosion.

"Damn," shouted Ashley. "I left my music collection by the front seat."

"Yet another proof that God exists," whispered Shepherd to Garrus who nodded in agreement.

Tali put her hand on Ashley's shoulder and Ashley let it stay there.

"Just so you know, lava really messes with the Normandy's finish and overall integrity, so let's not cut it so close next time?" suggested Joker over the intercom.

"Does your pilot always comment about narrow escapes like that?" asked Liara.

"Only from one in the morning on Sunday through eleven in the evening on Saturday," replied Garrus.

Shepherd now finished his report at his desk. "The volcanic eruption destroyed the integrity of the Mako necessitating a replacement at the Citadel docks and likewise threatened the safety of the Normandy and all crew requiring a swift withdrawal from the site."

He looked over it one more time then put his hand on the announcement PA.

"This is commander Shepherd. To make our new guest Dr. Liara T'soni feel welcome on the Normandy, as well as begin her integration as a crew member thanks to her request to assist, there will be a welcome dinner at 1900. Our 20 is the Citadel in order to replace the Mako and resupply. While at the Citadel there will be a 48 hour shore leave for all crew members. Shepherd out."

Tali perked up from the Engineering deck where she was busy studying the schematics of the vessel from an open terminal. She proceeded to track down Garrus whom she found in the supply bay were Ashley and Wrex likewise were hanging out during down time. Garrus noticed her coming.

"Hi Tali, I suspected you are here to inquire about the brandy supply?"

"Why Garrus," she cooed with a vocal wink if there ever was one. "What ever made you think that?"

"Because you made a straight line to me and not Ashley," he replied. "Had you gone straight to Ashley, I would have suspected you were here to assist her in downloading all her horrible music choices from her storage cloud."

"I already helped her do that an hour ago," replied Tali.

"Already?" stammered Garrus. "I would have thought it would have taken at least six hours given the size of her collection."

"I know some shortcuts," suggested Tali. "And if Yoker asks, no I don't know anything about a sudden drop in VI supply calculation efficiency this afternoon."

"When did that happen?" asked Garrus, partly because this seemed to sound like it was coming out of nowhere and partially because as a cop, he knew it _wasn't_ coming out of nowhere."

"For about an hour, two hours ago."

"And you know nothing about it?"

"Nothing."

"Not even . . ."

"Not even that," finished Tali. "Thanks, I'll be sitting next to you at dinner if you don't mind."

"Let's see," mused Garrus. "A woman who thinks I think Liara is cuter is going to sit next to me at dinner. Either I have something she wants so bad she's willing to endure the humiliation or I'm dead."

"Very true," replied Tali as she walked over to Ashley.

"And she left me with both options open to interpretation," mused Garrus to himself. He shook his head and began to examine the specs of a new sniper rifle. With the Mako a half melted pile of steel in the middle of a hot rock plateau, there was no gun he could calibrate. A half an hour later he looked up to see Ashley being taught some dance steps by Tali. Thankfully, he could not hear the music they were playing over their ear buds.

The dinner that night was hamburgers and hotdogs. Steak was simply too expensive and expansive in space to be carried. The best foods were those which could be completely consumed with nothing left over. So no bones or gristle or unappetizing fat chunks in the meat were allowed as a general rule. There was one exception but that wasn't going to happen just yet. Not that anyone complained, hot dogs and hamburgers were popular enough to be treats when they were only served up on special occasions. Garrus and Tali however had to be satisfied with their stale food tubes, but there was the Turian brandy and a credit transfer from Tali's meager account to pay for more when Garrus and she took shore leave.

"I wish I could afford a nice meal on the Citadel," she mused during the dinner. She looked up at Shepherd sitting with Kaiden and Ashley across the table from her for the umpteenth time. She took a meager sip from her brandy tube, determined that this night she was not going to get drunk.

"If I recall correctly, I owe you six dinners on the Citadel. So I must ask. Is that a request for me to take you when we get there or are you trying to send that request via telepathy to Commander Shepherd?" quipped Garrus.

Tali turned to him. "Where did you get that idea?"

"I can't see your eyes that well through your visor Tali but I'd lay 50 that they've been mooning at a certain commander across the table. You certainly keep looking in that direction."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"You don't but I do," retorted Garrus.

"How do you not know that I'm beginning to make friends with Ashley. She showed me line dancing and I showed her Quarian hop-step and she wanted to learn more about it."

"The fact that you asked that as a rhetorical question and not a direct statement suggests that Ashley was definitely not the target," answered Garrus. "You know I was in C-sec Tali, you can't think I don't know how to read people, even when they hide their face behind a visor."

"Well," said Tali with the hint of a huff. "If you must know, I'm working up the nerve to ask Shepherd something."

"What?"

"Something about Liara."

"Mmmm hmmm?"

"You don't believe me?"

"Oh I believe you, but given how you and Ashley reacted to the observations regarding Liara's looks, how do I know this isn't permission to jack her sleeping pod to the airlock vents?"

"Garrus," cooed Tali in a very coy fashion. "Surely she doesn't deserve something _that_ bad."

"But she deserves something?"

"Wouldn't you like to know."

Kaiden and Ashley stood up.

"We're going to do a little entertaining here," announced Kaiden. "And Ashley has agreed to sing along. So sit back and relax and hopefully you'll enjoy the songs."

"And just what sort of songs are we going to get to hear?" asked Shepherd with a facial expression which bore a 'don't you even think of . . .'

"Something along the lines of this," answered Kaiden strumming a few bars on his guitar. He looked at Ashley who was grinning back with a hint of wickedness.

They sang . . .

"I was drunk the night my mom got out of prison,  
And I had to pick her up in the rain,  
But before I could get to the station with my pickup truck,  
She was run down by the train."

"I'm going to kill the two of you," growled Garrus. "And I know Commander Shepherd's going to lend me the gun to do it."

"JUST KIDDING!" laughed Ashley.

Kaiden strummed a gentle tune and then softly he and Ashley sang the following . . .

"Under yonder oaken tree,  
Whose branches oft me shaded;  
Elves and fairies dance with glee,  
When day's last beam hath faded:  
Then while the stars shine brightly,  
So airy, gay and sprightly,  
'Till Chanticleer tell dawn is near,  
They trip it, trip it lightly.

Yet no trace of them is seen,  
When morning rays are glancing,  
Not one footprint on the green  
Shows where the elves were dancing:  
Oh! where are they abiding?  
In what lone valley hiding?  
Come next with me and we will see  
The fairies homewards gliding."

"Very pretty," mused Garrus. He turned to Tali who was just staring intently at Kaiden and Ashley. She seemed to be in complete concentration. He decided to not break into her reverie.

"Fairies and elves," mused Shepherd. "It's been a long time since I thought of fairy tales. I wonder why Kaiden picked that song."

Ashley and Kaiden seemed to be conferring and coming to agreement and they then sang another song.

"This is a song of missing homes," explained Ashley.

"Especially Canadian ones," added Kaiden.

"And it has no country western in it so you can remove your ear plugs Commander," added Ashley.

"Then I guess I don't have to run screaming out of the airlock," answered Shepherd chuckling.

Ashley and Kaiden sang . . .

"Oh ro soon shall I see them;  
Oh he ro see them oh see them.  
Oh ro soon shall I see them,  
The mist covered mountains of home.

There shall I visit the place of my birth,  
And they'll give me a welcome the warmest on earth.  
All so loving and kind full of music and mirth,  
In the sweet sounding language of home.

There shall I gaze on the mountains again,  
On the fields and the woods and the burns and the glens,  
Away 'mong the corries beyond human ken,  
In the haunts of the deer I will roam.

Hail to the mountains with summits of blue,  
To the glens with their meadows of sunshine and dew.  
To the women and men ever constant and true,  
Ever ready to welcome one home.

"Oh ro soon shall I see them;  
Oh he ro see them oh see them.  
Oh ro soon shall I see them,  
The mist covered mountains of home."

There was quiet applause, but a general silence which suggested that more than a few listeners where stricken with a brief bout of homesickness.

"How about something silly," suggested Joker, "Before we all start whimpering like a homesick Quarian."

"I'm right here Yoker," huffed Tali.

"Do you have something in mind?" asked Kaiden.

"Five Night's Drunk," replied Joker.

Kaiden looked at Ashley.

"I can sing the wife part and you the husband," she suggested.

The strums of the guitar sounded and the song began . . .

"Now I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found a horse in the stable where my horse ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come that horse in the stable where my horse ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a milk cow my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But a saddle on a milk cow I never did see before.

Well, I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found a hat on my hat rack where my hat ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come that hat on the hat rack where my hat ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a milk pail my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But a sweatband in a milk pail I never did see before.

Now I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found a coat on the coat-rack where my coat ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come that coat on the coat-rack where my coat ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a blanket my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But pockets on a blanket I never did see before.

Now I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found some boots under my bed where my boots ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come those boots under my bed where my boots ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a bed pan my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But spurs on a bed pan I never did see before.

Now I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found some pants on the dresser where my pants ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come those pants on the dresser where my pants ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a dish rag my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But a zipper on a dish rag I never did see before.

Now I came home the other night, drunk as I could be;  
Found a head on the pillow where my head ought to be.

Oh, come my wife, my pretty little wife, explain this thing to me  
How come that head on the pillow where my head ought to be.

_You blind fool, you drunken fool, can't you never see?_  
_That's only a mush melon my granny sent to me._

I've traveled this wide world over, a hundred miles or more,  
But whiskers on a mush melon I never did see before."

Everyone was laughing and clapping given Kaiden's inflections on the verses.

"Treacherous she'vet," grumbled Tali.

"It's supposed to be silly," suggested Garrus.

"There's nothing silly about a bond-mate who cheats on her partner," argued Tali. "Are human women really that untrustworthy?"

"Tali, how much infidelity is there on the Migrant Fleet?"

"Almost none," she said after a pause. "But it's only after great provocation. When a Quarian bonds with her mate, it's very deep. One feels emotional aching when one's bond-mate departs. It's why my father got so distant after mother died when I was young."

"Hey Commander," called Kaiden. "How about some piano? You've been working on tickling the ivories for weeks now. How about it?"

"After you and Ashley? I can barely play chopsticks," insisted Shepherd.

"Oh come on Commander!" shouted Joker. "At least you can play something! Any piano I play comes with the gentle sounds of breaking finger bones, and the squeals of pain."

"No," answered Shepherd.

"Why not?" asked Kaiden. "What's the point of practicing all those hours with that teaching program if you're not going to play something?"

"It's got to mean something to me in order to play it," answered Shepherd. "I've got no reason to want to play something. And I've yet to practice a piece on the piano which means something to me important enough to want to play it."

"We're not asking you to play some classical piece which moves us to tears, Commander," snarked Joker. "I mean, Hey! I like chop-sticks."

"No," persisted Shepherd.

"Alright, alright," groused Joker.

Ashley was looking at Tali. She turned to Kaiden and with bowed heads they conferred for a a moment.

"Hey Tali," said Kaiden.

Tali looked at him.

"Ash tells me you taught her some pretty neat dance steps from the Migrant Fleet. Have you any songs that your people sing?"

"Well," answered Tali with some hesitation. "There are some . . . we sing . . . when we are with friends and family."

"Then sing one for us!" said Kaiden.

There came a chorus of voices in agreement.

"Oh nonononononononononononononono!" Tali insisted. She covered the top of her visor with her palms, swiftly shook her head, and Garrus noticed she was rapidly making little kicks with her feet.

"So that's what she does when she's embarrassed," he mused.

"NO no no no no no I couldn't! No No No," she continued.

Garrus made a decision. He stood up and motioned to Shepherd who walked over.

"Come on Tali, you have a beautiful voice, like a bird's. Sing something," He persisted while John walked over.

Tali was still hiding herself behind her palms while Garrus made a quick silent suggestion to Shepherd. He grinned in agreement and grabbing one of Tali's arms, and Garrus the other, they hoisted her up on her feet.

"Now you have to sing!" insisted Kaiden laughing. "You're standing up!"

Tali was still covering her visor and shaking her head.

"Oh no no no, I can't sing," She insisted. It was not strictly true. She sang to herself all the time. She just didn't want to sing in front of everyone.

"Yes you can!" cried Kaiden.

"Yes you can," chanted Ashley clapping her hands to the rhythm of her voice. "Yes you can. Yes you can. Yes you can."

The entire room picked up on it, even Liara got into the clapping and chanting of 'Yes you can' while Tali just held out for another five seconds her head bowed and covered desperately trying to hunch herself into invisibility.

Finally, she couldn't stand it any more.

"Okay Okay Okay!" she said still struggling to not cover her eyes. She straightened up. John noticed that her eyes were tinged pink behind the visor.

"On one condition," she continued.

"And that is?" queried Kaiden.

"Commander Shepherd has to sing something first," she said. She was sure after his refusal to play the piano, she was safe.

Shepherd laughed.

"Easy enough," he said.

"Keelah I'm doomed," groaned Tali in her thoughts.

Shepherd began to slap his thighs hard and chanted a military cadence,

N7 In!  
N7 Out!  
N7 Running All About!  
N7 is the best by far!  
Hit 'em near and Hit 'em far  
Sound Off!

And all the crew shouted in rhythm "One Two!"

Sound Off!

_"Three Four!"_

One Two Three Four One Two

_"Three Four!"_

They say that in the Navy, the coffee's mighty fine,  
_They say that in the Navy, the coffee's mighty fine,_  
It looks like muddy water, and tastes like turpentine!  
_It looks like muddy water, and tastes like turpentine!_  
They say that in the Navy, the chicken's mighty fine,  
_They say that in the Navy, the chicken's mighty fine,_  
Mine jumped up on the table, and started double time!  
_Mine jumped up on the table, and started double time!_  
They say that in the Navy, biscuits are mighty fine,  
_They say that in the Navy, biscuits are mighty fine,_  
But one rolled off the table, and killed a friend of mine!  
_But one rolled off the table, and killed a friend of mine!_  
They say that in the Navy, the pay is mighty fine,  
_They say that in the Navy, the pay is mighty fine,_  
They give a hundred credits, and take back ninety-nine!  
_They give a hundred credits, and take back ninety-nine!_  
They say that in the Navy, the pods are mighty fine,  
_They say that in the Navy, the pods are mighty fine,_  
But how the hell would I know, I never slept in mine!  
_But how the hell would I know, I never slept in mine!_

Shepherd crossed his arms and grinned while everyone else finished clapping and cheering.

Tali was caught and she knew it. She struggled for a moment trying to think and then she remembered one song. She promptly rejected it as it was a kid's song, but nothing else would come to mind. Convinced she was going to be humiliated, she bit her lower lip and tried to explain before she sang it.

"This is a . . . song we would sing . . . when we were kids. It's about Rannoch, our home-world, and how we will go down the path and pick flowers and the Khelish translates, carry the scent with us, but it means we will remember. I don't know why it says it that way . . . It could easily been written remember I'm sure . . . But I'm not a song writer . . . And I'm babbling. I'll sing it now."

And she turned off her vocal translator and began to sing. And so that the gentle reader might hear the language itself, the author has chosen to write the Khelish phonetically rather than its genuine spelling. Of course the English translation does not follow any general rules of poetry, translations are like that I'm afraid, but hopefully I have captured the general gist of the lyrics.

The song sounded like this . . .

Ke you cheen Ran noch  
_Children of Rannoch_  
Shoen Tik kun vreen ling  
_Bright Tikkun shining_  
Quo see you kon brok  
_By our home pathway_  
Fley rou wro zing  
_Flowers grow sweet_  
Ey roh moh quo ray  
_Looking so pretty _  
Deen so go zhe day  
_Colors shine brightly_  
Kov roh dun klr ay  
_Breeze blowing gently_  
Gey doe on ring  
_Carry the scent_

She sang quietly the first verse which was the chorus and then sang a verse about one of the flowers, a red one, known as a Roshae which grew along the side of pathways, though no one but her knew what the verse said. Then she sang the chorus again and half way through she noticed that Kaiden was starting to accompany her with his guitar. She sang the second verse. It was about a yellow flower known as the Fleerou which grew at the top of small tree which grew along the sides of brooks. You had to climb the trunk to get it. Then she repeated the chorus again and now Kaiden and Ash were singing the chorus with her while Kaiden played a gentle guitar melody which blended perfectly. Then she got to the third verse, about a purple flower on a grasslike plant which made purple seeds known as the Whetrass. It grew in the fields by the edge of the deserts and it's scent you could 'carry' for the longest on the path. Then she sang the chorus for the last time but again, something happened. Ashley sang with her but after the first stanza, Kaiden started singing, but he was singing the first stanza. All the women sang with her and Ashley but all the men sang with Kaiden. Tali plowed through not knowing what had happened, but just as she finished Ashley sang it again and Kaiden followed, still one stanza behind Ashley.

She had no idea that Ashley and Kaiden had turned her kid's song chorus into a round. Ashley and Kaiden and the rest of the crew sang it three times before Kaiden sang the last stanza of the chorus by himself with the men and then he put his guitar down and looked at Tali grinning.

"That was so pretty!" sighed Liara.

There was a sudden burst of applause.

"But it's a kid's song!" protested Tali's thoughts feebly.

Then she was overwhelmed. The crew liked her. She was surrounded by people not Quarian, who had no real idea of her family's background (nor would it have meant much to them if they had) and in spite of that, in her mind anyway, they all liked her. There was Kaiden and Ashley sitting next to each other. Joker standing behind them. Wrex was leaning in a corner grinning. Garrus on the seat in front of her turned around and watching her, and Shepherd standing to her left, his arms crossed smiling. Engineer Adams was at another table over looking at her smiling as well. And Dr. Chakwas sitting, holding a small glass of wine, by the entrance of the Med Bay.

She felt all warm and fuzzy. She wanted to laugh and cry at the same time. But all she could squeak out was a "Thank you," and sat back in her chair.

"You can't sing another one?" asked Liara sweetly.

"Nonononononononono!" she insisted with rising tide of panic. "I don't remember any more."

The room was filled with "Ahs" and "Come ons" and "Yes you cans!"

"I think we've put our ducky on the spot enough for one night," suggested Shepherd. He smiled and shook his head and went back to his chair.

"And if he starts calling me Bugsy I'm going to really start to worry about him," said Garrus in a low voice as Tali sat back down. "Like I said, Tali. I think he likes you."

"And like I said, Garrus," she replied with a bit of exaggerated miff in her voice. "He has nose hairs."

"More Brandy?"

"Not tonight Garrus. I have to stay sober."

"But you slur your words so nicely when you're drunk," insisted Garrus. "Not to mention leaning on my shoulder so relaxed and gentle allowing me to mock Kaiden and Wrex with so little discomfort."

"I can get my shotgun," suggested Tali.

The party broke up and Liara was feeling most welcome and smiling to everyone who introduced themselves to her. Kaiden led her to where she would be sleeping, and the Shepherd showed her where her office would be. He had assigned her to reconnaissance and intel, given her scholastic talents.

Tali followed Liara's movements for a bit and sat at the table for what seemed forever, trying to screw up her courage for what she was about to do.

John Michael returned to the captain's cabin, and started to get into the mental state he would need to be in order to start running Liara through drill the next morning. They had a few leads as to the Matriarch's location and Noveria was looking like that was to be their next destination. If she was there, Liara didn't have much time to get trained adequately to be able to survive a fire fight with the Geth. Professors and Archeologists were not particularly known for their battlefield prowess. This was going to be a hard one.

He needed to get his mind off of things. He pressed a small command on his computer and the holographic tactile projection of a piano keyboard sprang up in front of him. He flexed his fingers to do drills to train his hands to play when his door signaled a 'visitor' outside.

"Open," he said.

The door swiftly and with a soft squeak opened revealing Tali standing on the other side.

"Come in Tali," he said with a gentle smile.

"Commander?" she said. She was rubbing her palms together and bouncing a little on her feet.

"Yes?" he queried with a slightly wider smile.

"Liara's going to be put through the pain of drill tomorrow right?"

"And probably the day after for a lot of days." he said as a matter of fact.

"By herself . . . With you . . ." continued Tali.

"Tali?" queried John. "This is sounding a little . . . Um . . . Well when girl A asks a guy about all the time he's going to be spending with girl B, it very strongly suggests a single particular something you don't need explained to about. But since girl B is about to be put through hell by the guy, which would be to girl A's decided advantage if that was the reason, that guy wants to know exactly why girl A is asking. This simply can't be an expression of jealousy or turf."

"OH No! No no no! Not at all. That's really very silly. Really. It's really impossible. I mean you and me? No no no. Not with all those nose . . . NECESSARY duties and responsibilities . . . You have that is," she shook her head in denial most vigorously.

"Okay," said John, smiling slightly. "I'll bite. Why do you ask."

"I . . . I want to join her in drill."

"Are you serious? You did well in the last mission, in fact, you were sterling in performance. Why do you want me to shove your face into the mud again?"

"Commander, you terrified me. I hated you by the end of the first day. I understand now why you did what you did. But at the time. She seems really sweet. The fact that her mother is working for Saren seems to have shaken her up. She's just escaped death at the hands of the Geth. The thought of you stomping on her stomach like you will, slapping her, kicking her, screaming in her face. I thought . . ."

"It might be easier on her if there was someone going through it with her?" suggested John.

"Yes," answered Tali.

"Permission granted," replied Shepherd.

"Thank you . . . Um, maybe not thank you exactly . . . I could accidentally drop my gun so you could yell at me first?"

"Tali?" replied John. "Believe me I know how to throw you curves so fast I'm sure I'll spark a genuine error so I can haul you through the barbed wire briars. Don't try to make a mistake. In order for this to work, it has to ring true."

Tali thought about this for a second.

"Is that why you threw so much at Ashley?" she asked.

"In part, but also because she was showing off and I wanted to wipe that smug off of her. You getting an 'accidental' trigger pulled on you was what I had been looking for the whole time."

"You mean you made . . ."

"No, Tali. She did that on her own. My point being that she didn't realize she was playing right into my hands when she did it."

"Interesting," mused Tali. "There's more to this than screaming and kicking and punching?"

"Very much so," said Shepherd. "Now is there anything else you want to ask before I transform into Captain Badass on you? I won't be the genial guy once you are 'in drill'."

"I understand, Commander," said Tali. She seemed to slouch briefly. "That's all. See you tomorrow. I'll be sure to be shaking in my little boots."

"I don't doubt it," laughed John. "You know exactly what's going to happen tomorrow. To you."

Tali left the room.

"That girl has spunk," mused John to himself. "She just met Liara, and she's going to put herself out to that extent. Damn, that's one hell of a girl! Hope I meet a woman like her some day. That would be just the sort I'd marry."

He returned to his keyboard and commenced to drill on the piano.


	4. Chapter 4 - Snowfall

"Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way!" sang Ashley and Kaiden while Tali was providing the sound effects of sleigh bells on her onmi tool. "Oh what fun it is to ride on a one horse open sleigh!"

"It's not even half way through October!" shouted John Michael Shepherd from his 'command' seat in the back.

The three members of Team Specter paused and looked about.

"Is this true? It's not even half way through October?" asked Ashley. The Mako was silent for the most part for a few seconds, only the hiss of the tires on the snow and the whistle of the wind blowing outside accompanied by the steady thrumming of the engine.

"What do you think Tali?" asked Kaiden.

Tali was busy on her Omni Tool.

"Lets see, it's 1734 hours, October 9th, 2183. So Commander Shepherd is correct. It is not yet half way through October," Tali concluded.

"He usually is correct," agreed Kaiden. "That's why he's Commander Shepherd."

"No doubt," added Ashley.

"Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way!" the three of them returned to singing and sound effects. "Oh what fun it is to ride in a one horse open sleigh! Hey!"

Citadel Specter Commander John Michael Shepherd groaned.

"Dashing through the snow (sfx: Whoosh),  
In a one horse open sleigh (sfx. Winney),  
Over the hills we go,  
Laughing all the way (sfx: mechanical ha ha ha),  
Bells on bob tails ring (sfx. Ding Dong),  
Making spirits bright (sfx: Zing!),  
What fun it is to ride and sing a sleighing song tonight (sfx: crickets chirping)!"

"Do you have to do this?" asked John, almost pleading.

The two conspirator singers and Quarian FX specialist looked at each other, Ashley risking peaks from behind her steering wheel, Kaiden looking towards Tali seated with her back to Ashley and in front of the Mako's engineering mainframe command board. And Tali looking back at Ashley before shifting her head to look at Kaiden.

"This spontaneous application of sound effects is enabling me to operate my Omni-tool at greatly increased efficiency," argued Tali. "Which means my response time during future missions will be greatly reduced encouraying success."

"And my smooth whiskey tenor voice is calming nerves stressed from our recent mission on Peak 15." suggested Kaiden.

"And of course singing brings happiness which improves team moral," replied Ashley. "And it's snowing outside!"

"Oh I give up!" shouted Shepherd throwing his hands up.

"Never surrender Skipper, never surrender," suggested Ashley with a bit of playful vim in her voice.

"Oh the weather outside is frightful, But the fire is so delightful, And since there's a Mako to go, Let it snow, Let it snow let it snow!" sang Kaiden.

Shepherd leaned back on his seat and groaned with a grin.

"Oh it doesn't show signs of stopping, but we've got some corn for popping, the lights are turned down way low, Let it snow let it snow let it snow!" joined Ashley.

Tali was bouncing along with the tune. While she didn't like the cold, and had found Noveria's weather to be anything but delightful, the cheerful qualities of Kaiden and his ability to put a song to any circumstance had made the trip back from the catastrophe that was Peak 15 less unsettling. There was a lot of tension which needed letting loose.

The prior days had been emotional for Tali. Commander Shepherd had been everything she had come to fear (and loath) and then some. Liara, utterly unprepared for the affair, was visibly shaking so badly that at one point she literally turned and ran for the nearest exit. Wrex caught her, hauled her back screaming, called her a little yellow blue skinned weenie and planted her in front of Shepherd, who, much to Tali's surprise, told Wrex to stand down, and then called Liara every cowardly name in the book.

But the worst moment was when Shepherd, true to his word, put Tali through such a rapid set of commands that she flipped her shotgun. She watched in horror, stuck in slow motion time, as the shot gun flipped out of her reach, end over end, only to come down on it's stock . . . and discharge.

She had forgotten to unload it. The slug of pellets slammed into the ceiling and then Shepherd was all over her. While he didn't tell her to stop crying, he mocked her for it, dressed her down, and made her jog in place for the next thirty minutes, after smacking her across the head with his fist. All the while she wept, in part because she was so humiliated, but also because she knew that she had come that close to killing someone. It wouldn't have mattered who, because it would have been someone who knew her name, and treated her with respect and acceptance.

But it had it's effect. Like Ashley's 'accidentally on purpose' trigger pull with Tali, it had a noticeable psychological impact on Liara. As Tali sat at the dining table, quite aware that folks were being rather subdued around her, Liara came over and sat next to her.

"Kaiden tells me you volunteered to drill with me," she said in a low voice.

"Kaiden needs to keep his big mouth shut, the bosh'tet," she answered. "But yes, I did. I went through what you're going through now a couple of weeks ago."

"Why?" She asked. "If I had known what I was in for, I would have simply asked the . . . Commander . . . To take me to the nearest port and let me off. I never would have volunteered for this."

"Because I knew what you were about to go through, and I didn't want you to go through it alone."

"Why?"

"Because I like you and I want you to succeed and be part of the team."

Liara seemed to think on that for a moment.

"If you are trying to get me to sleep with you," she observed with a smile which was a combination of sweet and wry. "You're well on the road to success."

"Oh nononononononono!" protested Tali shaking her head and holding her hands up in a combination of shock, surprise, and frank amazement. She knew in theory that Asari were mono-gendered and capable of reproducing with both male and female aligned species, but to have the possibility put to her was more than she had anticipated. She also had not anticipated Joker, standing six feet behind her, hearing the statement and suddenly becoming very interested in the conversation. "I mean I really like you and all Liara, and I think you're really sweet, and you have a very pretty face and you don't have to hide it behind a helmet which makes me a little yealous, but not that much. And I'm talking too much because now I'm nervous so . . ."

Liara started to laugh.

"You are such a sweet girl," she said leaning over and clasping Tali's hands. "We're going to be good friends, I know it . . . If I survive this."

She then sighed.

Tali found it rather interesting that Liara was able to find a way to hold her hands with all those fingers, but she didn't let go. She knew Liara needed this contact. It was like Kaiden had done with her back before.

"You will survive this," she said leaning forward looking at Liara in the face. "Shepherd won't give up until you are ready."

"That's not exactly good news," suggested Liara.

"Yes it is," said Tali, her voice rising just a bit on volume. "If Shepherd didn't care Liara, he'd have let you come with your pistol and not done a thing to try to mesh you with the rest of the team. All these drills are to make sure that no matter what happens, no matter how dangerous, how much your body tells you to run away and hide, you'll do what he tells you to when he tells you to do it and then, we survive and accomplish what we have to do."

"And it had probably saved Liara's life too," were Tali's thoughts as she once again became aware of the Mako's tires rolling over the snow covered shelf which led back to the main corporate headquarters on Noveria. It had been one for the books. They had arrived, and nearly had a gun fight right outside the air lock. And that was only the beginning. Before they ever had left the spaceport, there had been smuggling to do, computers to hack, security agents to shoot at (a lot of those), and corruption at the highest levels to uncover.

And that was before they had driven the brand new freshly made with a clean coat of paint mako out of the garage.

And then, starting in the garage itself, but continuing over the entire mission, there had been Geth to shoot at and get shot at by. They had had to kill a very large hoard of rather unnerving multi-legged creatures called Rachni which was supposed to be extinct. And then they got to Matriarch Benenzia who informed Liara that she had been spoiled as a child and now needed to be killed. And that was when the Asari Commando team attacked.

Tali paused in her recollections to express amazement to herself that after that, she was still alive with only some bullet chips in her armored suit. She paused and looked about.

Outside of the thrumming of the engine, there was no other noise in the vehicle. Everyone had gotten silent in the last few moments of Tali's recollections. Ashley was busy steering while Liara, in her newly assigned recon seat beside her remained quiet and looking very depressed.

After all, when you see your mother die, and know you had a part in it, even when it's something that needed to happen, it's still hard.

"She's going to need some serious comfort time," mused Tali. She looked over at Kaiden seated on the other side of the Mako.

"He would be a good one to do it," she thought. "He's a man, she would draw strength from him for sure." Even though Asari were mono-gendered, Tali still thought of her as female in most aspects. Then her gaze turned to Wrex.

"Probably break her, he hugs too tight most times," she mused.

Then she looked at Shepherd, who was leaning back with his eyes closed.

"No," she thought. Then she thought, "Why not?"

For some reason or other, the thought of Shepherd with Liara, even in something as simple fraternal and informal as a comfort hug was something she did not want to envision happening. When, after six days, Liara had passed drill, in part because Shepherd was able to spend almost exclusive time with her drilling the moves into her, Tali had been looking forward to the hug once he had said, "Congratulations."

"Me first," she had thought, and she, being prepared had hugged him back and was enjoyed to discover that he let her squeeze him a little and even trembled with a wee bit in excitement when he whispered into her ear, "I'm so damn proud of you doing this for her. Well done Tali, the team really depends on you."

Then he had gone over and hugged Liara, who's eyes were wide with utter surprise. But then it was alright because . . . Because Tali had been hugged longer.

"But his hair is wire, his skin is filled with all those pores, a lot of which need cleaning. He has flakes of that skin on his nose . . . And he has all those nose hairs!" She argued with herself. "He's not clean!"

"But he's dashing, and he cares for all of us, and he's the first to lead, the last to retreat, and he's making a difference, and he'll go the whole way for any of us, and besides, looks aren't everything," another part of her argued back.

"I'll get sick and die when I make love to him, even if I just hold his hands I'll get a rash probably," she pointed out.

"Just install nerve stim pro into you suit," suggested the other her, and with a flirty leering tone which both repelled and excited her at the same time. "All the fun and none of the risk."

"I don't want that!" she shouted back.

"Tali?" asked Shepherd. Every one was looking at her now.

"Umm," she replied. It suddenly dawned on her that her mental argument had become vocal at that last sentence. Might as well tell the truth, not all of it of course, but enough to make things go away. "I was having an argument with myself and I got angry."

"Did you win?" asked Wrex. "No good arguing with yourself if you lose."

"What don't you want, Tali," queried Shepherd. "If I might ask. If it's personal I'm sure we'll all understand."

"It is, very," answered Tali. "But I can say this much. What I don't want, is a cheap imitation."

"Then what ever you want," suggested Shepherd, leaning back and closing his eyes. "Is worth wanting. And I hope you get it."

"Oh ancestors," she mentally whimpered. "Oh home-world Rannoch, why did you go and make it just so much harder?"

Suddenly, it was like a hammer had slammed through and crushed a big black brick wall out of her way. She realized that what had persistently come to the fore again and again was that Commander Shepherd both respected and admired her, and what's more, had done everything in his power to keep her alive and healthy. But there was more to him. It wasn't just the behaviors of a commanding officer who treated her as an equal and vital part of a team, it was the behavior of another who actually liked her for who she was, and would remain a friend who would be glad to see her, long after the missions were done with. And no man had ever treated her like that before. In the single flash of a thought, her feelings and emotions and behaviors over the past few days had become patently obvious to her.

"You Bosh'tet," she continued to think. "You stupid immature Bosh'tet. You've gone and gotten a big adolescent crush on your commanding officer. Even with all those nose hairs sticking out at you."

She was tired. Very tired. Everyone was being quiet still. Liara, struggling with grief and relief over the fact that her mother was finally free of Saren's mesmerizing influence but at the same time dead. Ashley was concentrating on the road in front of her, chocked with snow as the daylight faded Garrus was still focused on keeping an eye out in case there were any remnants of the Geth seeking to ambush them on their way back to the headquarters and Normandy. Kaiden, Shepherd, and Wrex were already starting to lean back and nod off.

She leaned back and tried to catch forty winks, hoping to be awake just enough to be able to quickly respond should the Mako come under fire. But when she closed her eyes, now that she was being honest with herself, Commander John Michael Shepherd kept walking up to her and taking her into his arms and whispering how much she meant to him. And in the back ground like some pestering imp of legend, was the leering side of her dangling those nerve stim pro modifications behind him.

John leaned back and started to close his eyes. The Mako was not the most comfortable ride in the galaxy. Even if it was a brand new vehicle. Tali had already been poking her head into it and was beginning to think of ways to improve the suspension and had already found three spots on the armor where metal fatigue from construction had threatened the integrity of the vehicle. In Adam's weekly report, he had complained that because Tali was so busy with drill that she was too tired to pay much attention to the engines and she was being missed there. John opened his eyes and looked over to where Tali was curled up trying to catch a brief bit of sleep. She was definitely an asset to the team, and he had to admit he was quite fond of her. As Garrus had pointed out a few weeks prior, she had a cute gene and was not afraid to use it. But now he found her movements . . . curious. On one hand, as she tried to curl up and relax in her seat to get a brief nap, there was something sensual about the way she was moving her body around. But then he noticed her feet. Her shoes were not exactly flexible, but it seemed to him that her feet were trying to wrap themselves around something. He envisioned her trying to climb a tree for a second, those long toes on her feet gripping around the trunk as she scurried up.

"Monkey duck," he mused to himself, closing his eyes and leaning back to try to catch another bit of sleep. Kaiden opened his eyes for a second and looked at Shepherd.

"He's grinning like he's dreaming of cute girls," thought Kaiden who then closed his eyes and quietly napped.

Ashley looked back and noticed all the people trying to fall asleep in back as the head lights illuminated the falling snow in front of her. Part of her was annoyed that everyone was going to sleep while she had to drive, but the other part of her was rather proud of the fact that she was the one who was responsible for getting them all back in one piece.

"Garrus?" she asked. "What's up top?"

"Not much," came Garrus' voice back from his dome. "Wish there was infrared for this scope. Now that it's night, it's harder to tell if that big block up ahead is a snow pile or Geth armature waiting to blow up a tire."

"Until they figure out to shut themselves down in the freezing cold," replied Ashley.

"Even then they don't just cool down," Garrus answered. "It takes a while."

"Well you can ask the Duck when we get back," suggested Ashley.

She still didn't completely trust Tali, or Garrus, or Wrex, but especially Liara. And it didn't help that her little sister had told her Commander Shepherd looked cute. It had reminded her that not only was he a dashing good looking officer, but there were two other women now who were competition. While she found the idea of Tali and Shepherd together comical and highly unlikely, in spite of Tali's obvious infantile crush, the blue alien came from a race that had a reputation for being quick to go down on anything that was not Asari but sexy enough for an Asari, which was, from what she had heard, just about anything alive and capable of speech. Tali was clearly after Shepherd, she could tell. Volunteering to drill with Liara. Why hadn't she thought of that? She would have shown up Tali big time and she knew it. And Liara was so pretty _and dumb_ thinking that Tali was her first friend on the team. Tali was there to show off and if she hadn't dropped her shot gun, she probably would have had Liara running to the nearest port and would have been the end of it and it would have been back to her and Tali.

It was all so clear to her. Tali had gotten drunk that one night after the first team drill's completion and had suggested that Ashley and Kaiden made a really cute couple and they ought to link suits (what ever that meant) and make it official.

"You two sing so sweetly," she had said in that chirping drunken slur she had.

Now granted Tali had a point. And Kaiden was a really sweet guy, and she strongly suspected that they would make a good couple. She in particular loved his guitar playing and he liked to barbecue and wasn't afraid to have a couple of beers and just talk. Ashley really liked guys who liked to talk. If he had been able to speak something romantic like French, Spanish, or Italian, she wouldn't have cared that Tali was trying to manipulate things, it would have been the convenient excuse for her to wrestle Kaiden into her sleeping pod. And she had no doubt she could wrestle him into her pod. She was fully confidant of her wild cat lover qualities. But the fact that Tali had tried to match make them proved beyond the shadow of doubt, in her mind anyway, that Tali was trying to clear the way between herself and Shepherd.

"You should go over there and tell him he's kyute!" Tali had giggled between hiccups. "You liiike him," which clearly meant "Shepherd is mine and you stay away from him."

Ashley liked Shepherd, but she had this persistent suspicion that if Tali had not, in the past few days, been so obviously 'interested' in him, she wouldn't have been interested at all. After all, Kaiden clearly shared her love of music and poetry more than Shepherd. She still resented the fact that he had punched her during drill. And while she was honest enough to admit she had pulled her trigger on purpose, she didn't like the fact that he had given her the chance to fess up first and then have to hit the floor and do fifty as opposed lying about it three times and then being hit so hard she could still clearly remember how woozy she felt afterwards. She had been caught right good on all counts and everyone, but also especially Kaiden, had been decidedly cool to her for a week afterwards.

She continued to drive and muse. The road was getting straighter now which meant they were coming up to the port. They were maybe only ten kilometers out. She looked at Liara in the next seat. Liara was still just staring blankly ahead.

"Damn poor navigator," Ash grumbled to herself soft enough that no one heard her.

"Straighten up Ash," she thought to herself. There was no need for any of this. The way back was well marked, Garrus was watching her six, and Liara had just saw her mother die. Funny how she was actually trusting Garrus at the moment.

"None of this is making any sense," she admitted to herself.

But she wasn't ready to throw the towel in just yet.

Twelve minutes later, the Mako pulled into the long garage.

"We're hoooome!" shouted Ashley. "All you sleepyheads wake up and don't forget to take your trash with you or Skipper will make you vacuum the Mako all by yourself."

"Put a woman behind the steering wheel," rumbled Wrex. "And she turns into your mother."

Shepherd got out of the Mako, shivered in the cold air for a second before his insular armor warmed up the quilted lining underneath and put his hand to his ear to activate the micro comm link with the Normandy.

"Pressley? Shepherd here. How long before the Mako is loaded up into the Normandy?"

"About as long as it took to unload it," answered Pressley. "Two hours at the max. But we're still refueling. Local pumps seem to like to go slow about it, especially since the head exec was arrested by his secretary," Pressley paused "Whom you assisted."

"ET for departure?" asked Shepherd.

"Twelve hours min," replied Pressley.

"Give everyone you can shore leave until then," replied Shepherd. "And those you can't six."

"Will do," replied Pressley.

"Okay gang, we got twelve hours to kill in not the most hospitable luxury spot on the galaxy map. Who wants a nice dinner on your commander as a reward for coming back with only chipped armor?"

"Is this a trick question?" asked Kaiden grinning.

"Steak dinners by Commander Shepherd," whispered Tali to Liara. "They are the best, and we can get good and drunk together and have a good cry over it all."

Liara looked at Tali. "Now that you mention it, I really could use a very large number of drinks. But what about you? Does Shepherd find restaurants that serve Quarian food?"

"Only when he takes us out," answered Tali. "At least the last . . . Well only time . . . He took us out."

Shepherd was back on his micro-com link.

"Parasini? Shepherd here. . . . Yeah, we just got back from Peak 15 . . . Mission was a success, thanks in part to your help . . . No I don't want that beer now . . . What I want is a good recommend for a nice restaurant which serves food for both human and turian people . . . I got a hungry crew that will break up the hotel if they don't get fed some real food soon."

Wrex took the opportunity to howl and growl very loudly. Then he grinned.

"Yeah I figured you heard that . . . Glad to know you're terrified. . . The Multi-spec Pub? . . . Is that all? . . . Well it will have to do . . . No, it's okay, you're not responsible for the dining facilities . . ."

"Doesn't sound good," mused Kaiden.

"Beggars can't be choosers," offered Ashley.

Shepherd 'hung up' his comm-link.

"Well there's good news and bad news," he said. "Good news is there is a restaurant that will serve all of us food and drinks. Bad news is this, they were rather selective in their menu."

"Which means what?" asked Garrus.

"For Humans and Asarai and Krogan, beer and burgers."

"Liara? You like beer?" queried Kaiden.

"I don't know, I've never had it," she answered. Even so it was the first time she had brightened up since they had left Peak 15.

"For us Turians and Quarians?" asked Garrus.

"A very nice selection of drinks, including Muskwin," said Shepherd.

"Muskwin is nice, but the food?" pressed Garrus.

"Salad," answered Shepherd with an apologetic shrug.

"Salad," repeated Garrus slowly.

"And Cheese Plates," continued Shepherd with an embarrassed grin.

"Cheese . . ." was all that Garrus was able to say.

"I like cheese plates! Do you know how seldom we can get cheese on the fleet? Why when Kar'lee Cariah vas Sodelt brought back a freighter filled with it from his pilgrimagh two admirals were competing by offering him bigger and bigger living spaces if he would offer the gift to them!"

She dashed over to Shepherd and gave his arm a big squeeze. Then she realized that people were beginning to snicker. "Um," she offered, letting go of his arm and scooching back away from him. "Thanks Commander."

"You're, ah, welcome Tali. I'm glad it's made you so happy," replied John who found the whole incident not only amusing, but kind of nice.

"Well that settles it," observed Garrus. "We have to let Tali at the cheese plates for the sake of team moral."

"Very much so," agreed Tali. "We have to keep the Enyineer happy or the Mako won't run very well."

"The integrity of our mission's success is being threatened by the absence of a cheese plate," drolled Ashley.

"But we get burgers and beer, girl, is that so bad?" asked Kaiden.

"I suppose not, but I don't know any songs about cheese plates once the beer gets into my system so don't ask."

As the entire hotel complex was a single building, the Multi-spec Pub was about a hundred yard walk through the foyers and lounges. They walked into the place and were led to a table where Garrus and John both agreed that the music, not being country - western, was a superior selection.

As John had sat down he was almost entirely oblivious to the sudden game of musical chairs to his right. It started with Liara sitting down one empty chair to his right leaving an opening between him and Liara. For this gap Tali made a beeline (justifying it on the grounds she was sitting next to Liara) but Ashley seemed to jump in front of her and snag it, leaving the chair on the other side of Liara empty but one which Garrus was approaching. Tali, in a huff over Ashley's blatant (in her mind) theft, determined to maintain some sense of integrity and leapt into that leaving Garrus baffled as to this sudden move. He sat on the other side of Tali, which he had thought of doing anyway since it made sense for the two dextro's to be adjacent to each other.

Beer was purchased by the pitcher, save Garrus and Tali who got a bottle of Muskwin, a drink similar to wine. The recipe was somewhat different however in that it wasn't the fruit of the vine that made up the concoction, rather it was the entire perennial, crushed, smashed, ground up, mixed with water and left to soak for a year before being filtered out. The Turians took it's making very seriously and even the mass produced vintages were of superior quality to most human mass produced beers or wines. To the human palate, it was incredibly sweet, almost sickening intensity, but utterly lacking any nutritional value, being dextro in composition. Having a bottle with Tali before salad and cheese put Garrus in a decent mood and after the second bottle with the salad and cheese he voted the restaurant a capital establishment.

Tali happily nibbled on her cheese, talking about all the different types she was getting (often forgoing the crackers entirely) and sipping her glasses of muskwin, once again resolving to not get drunk, well maybe a little: tipsy, just not too much: well okay tipsy will be fine: oh never mind it's really good stuff so go ahead and get buzzed: hey Garrus ordered a third bottle and someone will carry me back to the ship, they always do, so keep drinking.

But she also was chatting with Liara.

"Well Liara," she began, only at the beginning stages of tipsy, just before the arrival of the cheese plate, "You got through your first mission okay didn't you?"

"I don't know if it was . . . Okay," sighed Liara. "I was so scared, if Shepherd hadn't been yelling orders in my ear I'd have frozen in place."

"And that's why he drilled us all," answered Tali. "You would think after two big missions like Therum and now Noveria, I'd be getting less stressed about this stuff. But every time Ashley or Garrus says, 'hostile' I swear my heart bounces off my brain and then rattles around in my stomach."

"I guess then I'm not alone being so scared," observed Liara. "What do you think about this beer?" She added, holding up the mug she had half drained.

"It's levo," answered Tali. "It would kill me if I drank it possibly."

"I'm not sure about it," continued Liara, looking at the mug. "It's got a nice color and it makes me think of nuts. But it's also bitter, a nice bitter maybe. I'm not sure. But it's got alcohol and so I'm inclined to overlook it's deficiencies."

She took another drink.

"We could get drunk together, I mean if anyone deserves it, it's you, after umm. . ."

The two girls leaned their heads together and spoke in low voices. The rest of the table briefly looked and then got involved in other conversations and bits of song once Kaiden began on his third mug of beer. It was as if Liara and Tali were in their own little world.

Liara sighed. "I thought it would be okay," she continued. "I had convinced myself that the good woman and mother I once remembered was dead and all that was left was the puppet of Saren. And then to realize that she was 'mesmerized' by him, a spiritual thrall, who finally was able to break free before she died, it was like losing my mother a second time."

Tali nodded.

"I lost my mother too," she added. "I was still a child at the time but I remember my dad getting very distant after that. He had really loved her and there was always some . . . I guess anger that he had lost her so soon."

"I've heard Quarians bind very deeply," said Liara.

"So it is said," replied Tali. "I have not experienced it myself, I mean, I've had crushes, guys I thought were cute, but a bonding is supposed to be so deep and lasting you can really feel their absence and when they die, it's like a piece of your heart dies as well. There have been so many cases of when a deep bonding is broken by death, the surviving partner will kill themselves."

"That sounds both so romantic and horrible at the same time," said Liara with brief gasp of air at the beginning. "What if there are children?"

"We have a whole branch of psychologists who specialize in what is called bond-grief management. When the bond-mate dies, the family surrounds the survivor and keeps an eye on them."

"But after the grief, there's always another bonding with a new partner isn't there?"

Tali shook her head.

"Once it happens, it's for life," she answered. "Oh there have been great scandals on and off, about once every fifty or so years it is discovered that so and so cheated on their bond mate after some horrible incident or other. Sometimes those even end in murder, there's so much anger at the betrayal. The last time was when my father was a kid. One of the Admirals got so drunk he bragged that his bond-mate was so pretty that he was willing to put her in front of the admiralty board naked to prove it. And then he called her in and told her to strip. And as a result she went and . . ."

"So what's wrong with that?" Asked Liara.

"You don't find that a problem?" exclaimed Tali who swallowed twice in shock.

"Oh I'm sorry," apologized Liara. "I forgot you are not mono-gendered. Modesty is not an issue with us Asari. Clothing for us is merely practical given the behavior of other species, even when it was just ourselves, we wore clothing primarily because it was protection and kept us warm. On warm summer days, on the beaches, on our home worlds, you won't see a single bathing suit on an Asari."

"Well that explains why there are so many Asari dancers," mused Tali.

"Actually, the reason why there are so many Asari dancers is because we love to dance. But since so many opportunities for professional dancing demand that the dancer wears little or no clothing, and since we don't have issues with being naked in comfortable climate environments, we end up dancing in all those clubs."

"So it's got nothing to do with umm . . ."

"Not at all," answered Liara. "I mean, you know that professional ballet companies which come from Earth are now routinely hiring Asari dancers don't you? Not to mention professional dance companies which perform for all those music and musical vids. Why one of my girlfriends didn't think twice about dancing entirely naked (I mean not even shoes or jewelry were allowed) at this one club on the citadel so she could earn enough money to take step-dancing lessons and what she learned she incorporated into her repertoire at the club and the audience loved it. Some of them actually told her they would watch her even if she were dressed. Sure enough, one professional producer came by the club one evening and hired her on the spot. She's now one of those show dancers in the Royal House Casino on Earth. I think the city is called Monaco. The so called Gentlemen clubs are just the stepping board for young Asari to better careers, but after 100 years, if they don't go any farther, they do something else. When you can look good to multiple species for a couple of centuries, you can really rake in a lot of money especially when you put it into long term investing. But I supposed that has a lot to do with why we are known as tramps."

"Oh well, we Quarians are supposed to be thieves," signed Tali.

"And Turians are arrogant tyrants," added Liara nodding.

"And Krogan are violent bullies," kidded Tali who was getting into listing each species vices.

And Volus are greedy little prigs," insisted Liara. "Don't forget to read the small print."

"And Vorcha? Don't get me started on the table manners of the Vorcha," groaned Tali.

"And Elcor, slow and oh so dull," giggled Liara pouring herself another mug of beer.

"Stifling Yawn," she joked in a low monotone. "I can't speak with inflection."

"And Hanar?" quipped Tali

"Big Stupid Jellies/Yellies!" both girls giggled together.

"And who can forget human treachery?" said Liara with a 'you know what I mean' tone in her quiet voice.

"Not Shepherd." It was out of Tali's mouth so fast she barely had time to comprehend she had just defended him.

"By the Goddess I hope not," sighed Liara. "Our lives are depending upon him."

Then she looked curiously at Tali.

"You like him don't you," she leaned over and spoke in a low voice.

"Keelah, is it that obvious?" sighed Tali.

"Well, only a little," assured Liara. "I'd never have known except you were so quick to defend him."

"He rescued me from death. Made me a team member. Told me he's proud of me. Told me Adams likes me in enyineering, and he's trying to make the galaxy a better place," she said slow and sad. "How can I not be interested?"

"I know what you mean," answered Liara. "He is very dashing and handsome and . . ."

Tali gave her such a look with that visor that Liara could almost swear that Tali's chin was trembling underneath it.

"Oh no no no," she continued. "Tali, I won't ever come between you and Shepherd, after all you have gone through for me? By the Goddess I'm not a human, I'm Asari and you're my first friend here."

She gripped Tali's hand and held it.

"Does he know?" asked Liara leaning in even closer.

"I don't think so," whispered Tali.

"Girl! You need to tell him, what's the worse that can happen?"

"A dream dies," sighed Tali. "I love the dream so much. And it will die Liara. I can't have him as bond-mate. We eat different food. I'm alleryic to him. It would take months for me to be able to get out of this damn suit with him in the same room and you can yust walk into his cabin naked tonight and make love and how can I compete with that?"

"I don't see myself being that forward, at least while I'm still sober," she quipped with a smile. "But Tali? I think that's his decision. Not yours. How will you know if you don't tell him?"

"It's yust not going to work, Liara. I know that. I have to finish my Pilgrimagh first. My father's honor is dependent upon me doing well. Then once I get into the fleet and among my people again, I hope the feelings will fade. I mean he's not touched my skin or seen my face. I can't have possibly bonded with him. So I'll get over it some day."

She sighed.

"But you _don't_ want to get over him," observed Liara. "Can't you see that?"

"Of course I can see that," responded Tali.

The two girls were now so close and talking in such whispers that everyone was beginning to notice them out of the corners of their eyes.

"What are those two doing?" whispered Kaiden to Wrex.

"Plotting to take over the galaxy in some girly girl fashion," rumbled Wrex.

"Ah," answered Kaiden. "Not that I'd mind. Nice to know the galactic leaders before they take over, makes getting a good farmstead on prime colonial property when I retire much more easy."

"But do you want a girly girl galaxy?" pondered Wrex. "I mean we're talking about pretty pink space ships with flowers all over them, and smiling pyjakes on our banners."

"Beats what Saren is planning," suggested Kaiden.

"That's not the point Kaiden," grumbled Wrex. "If it's a choice between those Earth Margarineflies . . ."

"Butterflies," corrected Kaiden.

". . . on a pastel chartreuse armor and the Reapers destroying the galaxy? I choose the Reapers."

"I'm such a messed up girl, Liara," continued Tali. "I know I can't have him. But I don't want to lose him. So I won't tell him so I can live in this stupid dream that can never be."

"You almost make me want to tell him myself," said Liara in a stern voice. "It would do you good girl."

"Please!" whimpered Tali grabbing her hand and squeezing tight. "For our friendship, don't. If you like him, and he will have you, go ahead. It will hurt me like hell but it's only right. I'll get over it. Yust don't tell me you are going to do it."

"Well if I really were a tramp, I'd say 'thank you Tali'. Then I'd get up on this table and dance for him. And if he asked, I'd strip while doing it. Because he is very attractive. Like you, he saved my life and he's going to try to save this galaxy of ours in spite of our galaxies ingratitude. Those are really nice qualities and besides, having a bed partner like that is good for a career. But you're my friend, and some things just are not worth it, especially since he's got such a short lifespan."

"So now what?" queried Tali.

"We get really drunk. Now!" said Liara who drained her mug and refilled it.

Tali followed suit and Garrus ordered that third bottle.

The two girls giggled and swayed down the hallways of the spaceport, holding hands back to the Normandy with the rest of the team chatting and joking around them.

"Tali seems to have found a friend in Liara," suggested Kaiden to Shepherd.

"Did you know she volunteered to drill with Liara?" asked John.

"She told me herself on the second day when I asked her." answered Kaiden. "That's one mighty fine girl you've got there, Commander."

"Me?" asked John looking at Kaiden.

"You mean you are not interested?" asked Kaiden. He put his hand on John's shoulder and they let the rest of the group pass so they might talk unhindered.

"Do you think for one moment that she would be interested in me?" asked John. "I know she's very friendly, but she likes all of us. After all, we've accepted her as a team member and you know how close we're all getting as this thing gets nastier and nastier. Comradeship among fellow soldiers is always strong. But as for romance? Seriously Kaiden, this is a Quarian we are talking about. She's allergic to humans. I could kill her just by breathing on her. The only thing harder to date would be a Volus. In which case death is guaranteed for both of us."

"Well Volus are rather short and stubby," agreed Kaiden chuckling. "And the girls really do explode once you take their suits off. But at least you would die rich in a clean environment, what with all that ammonia and financial wiz-bang."

John laughed. "Anyway, yeah, she'd be a nice one to date and even marry. But we both know it won't happen."

"It won't?" queried Kaiden. He had one eyebrow lifted.

"Why would you think it would?" asked John.

"Um," replied Kaiden. "Well . . . Never mind. I just thought there might be something."

"Well if she ever tells me, I might consider it," answered John. "Hell, I wouldn't just consider it. But as it won't happen, I just hope I find a girl like her down the road."

"I'm not going to be the one to tell him," concluded Kaiden's thoughts on the subject as he and Shepherd walked back to the Normandy talking about the next planned operations. "I might have read things wrong and that would be horribly awkward to say the least. You don't get places by embarrassing your commander in front of other crew."

"And besides," Kaiden continued thinking as they walked silently for a moment. "Quarians are not humans. She really could be simply expressing friendship. After all, how would I know what signals a Quarian girl would give if she liked a human guy? And do Quarian girls even find human guys handsome? How many Quarian-Human relationships do I know about? None!"

The next morning, before the breakfast bell, Liara got up, cursed her throbbing head, took some pain killers, and then walked into the next room which happened to be the Medical Bay and sat down next to Dr. Chakwas waiting for her to finish her medical evaluations.

"I have a question, Doctor," began Liara.

"And that would be, Doctor?" replied Dr. Chakwas with a grin.

"Well now that we got that out of the way, call me Liara."

"And you can call me Karin."

"Well then Karin, are you aware that Tali is hopelessly infatuated with Commander Shepherd?"

"Since Tali tends to wear her emotions on her sleeve, I don't think there's a single member of the crew, absent the Commander, who is not aware she has a big crush on him."

"It's tearing her apart, she's disqualified herself from any chance of it actually happening and I worry about Quarian bonding issues. If half of what she said was true, if they were to get separated or he were to be killed . . ."

"She would get over it with minimal psychological trauma," said Karin. "I did extensive research on the subject when I started to notice how Shepherd treated her and how she reacted, especially in the last two weeks. There really can be no genuine bonding in the Quarian fashion unless Shepherd expresses his willingness to unite with her. And then, once they consummate the relationship, only then is the bonding fully set.

"So she's only at a beginning stage?"

"As far as I can tell," continued Karin. "Discrete inquiries to the Migrant Fleet helped clear up some issues. And believe me the inquiries had to be discrete. Tali's father is an Admiral in the fleet and if word got out that she was in danger of bonding with a human, she would be recalled. And trust me, Shepherd would not like that at all.

"Does he . . . Um . . . Would he if he knew?"

"He's a typical male in that yes, he is, and yes, he would, but he is completely oblivious to it."

"How can your males be so dense?"

"Liara? More than a few women psychologists have spent years researching that subject. And the answer to your question, based on hundreds of studies is this; we haven't got a clue."

"Well that makes me feel better, sort of, but given the anguish I heard in her emotions last night . . ."

"Quarians are a fascinating race," mused Karin. "They have such strong emotions but at the same time are capable of turning them off in a second if they so choose. Tali feels strongly about Commander Shepherd because she wants to feel that way. It's sort of a drug for her. A drug which makes her happy in spite of the fact that it's also making her miserable."

"What should I do for her?" asked Liara. "She's my friend and I want her to be happy. She's done so much for me already."

"Tell her to tell Commander Shepherd," said Karin. "As often as it takes for her to straighten up and take the lumps or sugar. She's still very much a child in many ways, being protected by her father's prestige. She needs courage to take the risk. If she won't . . . Well, she might end up doing something stupid."

"Such as?"

"She has to go back to the fleet once she gets her gift," answered Karin. "And Commander Shepherd is going to make sure she get's a treasure. If she won't resolve this, she won't go back to the fleet. I don't know what the consequences of that would be, but I don't imagine it would be good for her. She has to resolve it one way or the other before those emotions she's playing with burn her good."

"Well," mused Liara. "That helps me somewhat. At least there is something I can do. I suspect it will need to be well timed for best effect."

Karin chuckled. "Liara, I know you Asari live to be a thousand years old and I know you are already older than nearly all of the oldest of humans alive today, so don't take too much time to drop the gentle hint or we'll all be too senile to remember we had this conversation."

Liara laughed.

"This is an interesting interplay of species isn't it?"

"Welcome to today's modern galaxy," replied Karin with a smile.


	5. Chapter 5 - First & Last Christmas

The angel Gabriel from heaven came,  
With wings as drifted snow, with eyes as flame:  
"All hail to thee, O lowly maiden Mary,  
Most highly favored lady." Gloria!

It was the evening of December 25th on the Normandy. Christmas hymns and songs were playing over the ship's loudspeakers. Cheap plastic pine branches and holly with faded plastic red berries hung from special hooks along the walls. And the dining tables in the galley had little blinking Christmas trees. But no nativity scenes, either on the shelves or walls. It was the best you could hope for from the Alliance military who had an almost superstitious reluctance to acknowledge the majority religious belief of humanity. It's not that there were other religions out there of course, but Christianity, since the conversion of Africa in the late 20th, the full conversion of India in the mid 21st, and the extensive conversion of China in the prior six decades had become the belief system of half of humanity. It had even been the success of the Black Russian Crusade against a genocidal North American / European power block which had been the reason for the very Alliance which now spanned the stars. Even so, the politicians were afraid that some New York City Pagan or some Amsterdam Moslem would go all terrorist on a ship and start to shoot it up if people so much as said "Merry". Of course the politicians could not stop the Normandy from playing music when the politicians were not on board and no one hated Christmas music, except the country - western styles.

They were two days from Virmire where they hoped to link up with a Salarian Special Opts team and deal Saren a hard nasty blow. And John Michael Shepherd was moving along the ships decks looking for something. So far there had been no luck.

"I know I put it back in my locker," he thought. "I checked everything just last night before I turned in."

"For know a blessed mother thou shalt be,  
All generations laud and honor thee;  
Thy son shall be Emmanuel, by seers foretold,  
Most highly favored lady." Gloria!

He was on the bridge. Might as well start there.

"Joker?"

"Commander?" responded Joker and he twirled around in his chair.

"Do you happen to know what happened to my torso armor piece? I want to check it's integrity before the Virmire touchdown so there will be time to retool it if necessary."

"No Commander, I have not seen your armor piece. But don't worry, I'm sure it will show up soon," replied Joker with not so much as a hint of humor.

John stood there for a moment while Joker smiled and shrugged his shoulders.

"He's not cracking a joke," mused John. "That is odd."

Then gentle Mary meekly bowed her head;  
"To me be as it pleaseth God," she said.  
"My soul shall laud and magnify God's holy name.  
Most highly favored lady." Gloria!

"No Commander," replied XO Pressley before John even opened his mouth.

"How did you . . ."

"Heard you ask Joker. Don't worry, we've not stopped at any port since you missed it. It will show up soon I'm sure."

"You sound rather confidant about that," suggested Shepherd.

"Seriously do you think anyone would try to get away with stealing your armor knowing how careful you are with it?" replied Pressley. "Like I said, I'm sure it will turn out to be just misplaced."

"I don't misplace my armor," suggested Shepherd.

"If you can't find it, then what other option do you have?" replied Pressley smiling.

Of her, Emmanuel, the Christ, was born,  
In Bethlehem all on a Christmas morn,  
And Christian folk through-out the world will ever say:  
"Most highly favored lady." Gloria!

Grumbling to himself at the curious behavior of Joker and Pressley, Shepherd walked past the holographic galactic map and turned to enter the briefing room. Naturally it was not there.

"Because I know I put it in my locker like I always do!" he shouted to himself in frustration.

He walked out and took the stairs down, rounding the hallway. Kaiden was walking towards him up the hall when Ashley came out of a room, and said "Ha! You're standing under mistletoe Kaiden."

Kaiden, being a well trained member of Team Specter said, "Huh?"

And couldn't say anything else for a few seconds because his lips were entirely pinned by Ashley's.

Grinning Shepherd leaned against the wall for a second.

"Um Comman . . ." began Kaiden.

"Mistletoe," answered Ashley, and she kissed him again.

"Um Ash . . ."

"Um, Mistletoe," and once again Kaiden was fully pinned.

"Congratulations on your successful tactics, Wing-girl," said Shepherd. "Excellent employment of distraction coupled with good misinformation before the frontal assault."

"COMMANDER!" jumped Ashley. She was blushing furiously.

"Really happy for you two," suggested Shepherd.

"Wow . . . Um . . . thanks Commander," answered Kaiden. "But this is the first time I've been kissed by . . . Ash? How long have you been thinking about this? And Commander? what do you mean distraction anyway?"

"Look up Kaiden," suggested Shepherd.

Still holding Ashley, he looked up.

"There's no mistletoe up there!" he cried.

"Nope," observed Shepherd. "We don't have any on the ship. You can't get the real stuff off of Earth anyway."

"And in answer to your question," replied Ashley. "Long enough."

"Now that I've got your full attention," continued Shepherd with an smile laced with irony. "I'm missing my N7 Armor Torso Plate. Have either of you seen it?"

"Not in the last few hours, Commander," answered Kaiden.

"Not at all," replied Ashley.

"Not in the last few hours?"

"Yeah, I mean I'm sure I've seen it around somewhere," replied Kaiden.

"Any idea where you saw it?" pressed John.

"No Commander I can't say," answered Kaiden. He smiled. "Relax Commander I'm sure it will show up shortly."

"What is this about 'I'm sure it will show up soon' crap!" griped Shepherd. You and Joker and Pressley now."

"Commander," said Kaiden softly and smoothly. "It's Christmas. Don't worry about it, relax, we'll get it all sorted out tomorrow."

"We're two days out from Virmire and I want to make sure that . . ." persisted Shepherd.

"First thing tomorrow morning, whole crew if necessary," answered Kaiden. "Okay?"

"Fine!" snapped Shepherd. "Whole crew and if they bitch, Kaiden, I'll make sure everyone knows it was your idea, got it?"

"Understood Commander," replied Kaiden with a grin and salute.

"He's acting way to sure of himself," grumbled Shepherd to himself as he walked away. "You would think he knows something I don't."

"Now about this fake Mistletoe," began Kaiden.

"Yes, mistletoe," replied Ashley who promptly kissed him again.

Shepherd walked into the storage bay and began to methodically go through each locker.

"Shepherd?" queried Wrex walking up to him after he had spent a couple of moments searching.

"Wrex? Have you . . ."

"No Shepherd I have not," replied Wrex. "But word has gotten out that you are looking for it."

John sighed and drooped for a second.

"I thought this human Christmas thing was supposed to be about good cheer and a party."

"The party and gift exchange will be in an hour Wrex."

"Yeah, about the gift exchange, I got Liara in the gift pool, what do you think she'll like?"

"You're waiting until now to figure this out?" asked Shepherd.

"No Shepherd, I'm Krogan. I live for hundreds of years. I learn to think things out for the long haul. So I've been trying to figure it out for two weeks now. Ever since we left Feros in fact. But there are two problems. First, she's Asari. The second is that she's a woman. I simply have no clue what to get her."

"You could have asked Ashley," began Shepherd.

"Shepherd, Ash has not been talking to me since that incendiary bullet hit her in the flank and started to smoke back when we were in the tunnels ," began Wrex.

Shepherd nodded with understanding for Wrex was referring to the mission on Feros. It had been a blaze of incendiary gunfire from a Geth Prime who had blanketed an open space between two large blocks that Ash had to dash across. The first few rounds had knocked out her shields while the last one hit her in the back of her right hip. It hadn't penetrated her armor enough to cause any burning, but there was smoke and sparks and a little blue flame in the hole where the bullet had hit. Wrex promptly pointed out to Kaiden that Ashley's tush was on fire. Ash had failed to see the humor in the incident then and still refused to see the humor at present.

"Okay so you can't ask Ash," agreed Shepherd. "How about Tali?"

"She's been busy with her present, working out engineering schemes for at least a week including umm . . . other stuff," Wrex seemed to have thought of saying something else but had decided against it.

Shepherd sighed. "When in doubt, get a young girl a big pink stuffed bunny."

"She's over 100, Shepherd," observed Wrex.

"She's regarded as barely out of adolescence by her people, Wrex," countered Shepherd.

"Can't get a big pink stuffed bunny between now and the exchange, Shepherd," replied Wrex.

"Promise her one on a nicely written piece of paper in a festive envelope," suggested Shepherd.

"That requires me to write something," objected Wrex.

"You can do that easily," retorted Shepherd.

"No I can't Shepherd. I'm a Krogan mercenary. I don't do sissy things like write or read letters. If you can't explain it in pictures it's not worth my time to learn."

"Fine! I'll write it for you okay?"

"Are you telling me that I'm going to have to go into some pink fuzzy girly place and pick out a girly fuzzy something for her when I get to the citadel?"

"Yes!"

"What if I promise to kill a dozen of her specified enemies for her when she starts to advance in her career after we destroy Saren?"

"Not in the Christmas spirit, Wrex," replied Shepherd.

"Stupid holiday," grumbled Wrex.

Shepherd spent the next forty five minutes printing out a nice holiday promissory note for Liara from Wrex. He ended up printing out Wrex's name in nice block letters since when he showed Wrex where to sign his name, Wrex had simply poked his thumb and smeared his blood on the spot.

Then he headed for engineering in the hopes that he might figure out where his torso piece was.

In the meantime, Tali, having finished wrapping her Christmas present with a big red bow was happily dancing to a Quarian pop song she had just downloaded from the extra-net a day prior.

"You're on the comm with your girlfriend, she's upset,  
She's going on about Vresha, Me, and Bret,  
She doesn't get your virtue like I do  
I'm at my station by the engines one and three,  
I'm telling you about my people's history,  
Oh, she'll never get your passion like I do."

She began to dance to the beat

"But she's a bad ass, I'm a clean freak,  
She's a soldier and I'm just a tech geek,  
Dreaming 'bout the day when the girls will all cry,  
'Cause I've plopped on your lap with a smile and a sigh,  
If you could see the girl behind this damn helmet,  
Been here from the start so why can't you seee 'eee 'eee,  
You were meant for meee 'eee 'eee!"

Bouncing around she deftly leapt over the big box with bright red bow which she had spent the last six hours working on. She had been on pins and needles the whole time from her initial acquisition to the final touches. Finally able to relax she needed to burn off some energy to alleviate the tension.

". . . you play it cool I know you better than that,  
Hey why you pining for a girl like that? '

She's a racist and a bit butch,  
I'm the machinist who's got the cute tush,  
Dreaming 'bout the day when you call me upstairs  
And I sit on your lap and get lost in your stares,  
If you could see the girl behind this damn helmet,  
Been here from the start so why can't you seee 'eee 'eee,  
You were meant for meee 'eee 'eee."

Standing by waiting at the ship's core,  
All this time how could you not know babeee 'eee 'eee,  
You were meant For meee 'eee **YEEEP!**"

When you are swinging your head back and forth, moving your arms in rhythm, twirling around and around, and keeping your eyes closed, when you reach the final pitch, as loud as you feel like singing, and you open your eyes, and find a John Michael Shepherd face has entirely engulfed your visor, you can be somewhat disconcerted.

"Hey Tali," began John with a smile. He had, of course, found her singing and dancing extremely cute. He didn't understand a word of it because it was all in Khelish, except for the Yeep part at the end when she had twirled around and spun right up to him. The sudden opening of the eyes (one of the few facial gestures one could see through that visor) and the leap back had made the yeep perfectly comprehensible.

"Um, hello Commander Shepherd," began Tali. Having nothing better to do and feeling very nervous all of a sudden, she starting twisting her palms together. "Um . . . Merry Holidays?"

"Merry Christmas," suggested John.

"Yes, yes, Happy Christmas," stammered Tali.

"That's Happy Holidays," suggested John.

"Oh keelah," signed Tali.

"That sounded like a really up beat song, what's it about?" continued John, concluding that Tali's sudden attack of nerves had more to do with his sudden appearance when she was in her own private happy place than anything else.

A sudden vision of Liara appeared in Tali's mind's eye wagging a finger at her and telling her this was the perfect opportunity to confess her feelings. Tali shot her with her shotgun. As both the shotgun, the pellets it fired, and the vision of Liara were all figments of her imagination, casualties were kept at a minimum.

"You mean you didn't hear the lyrics?" asked Tali somewhat incredulous.

"Well I heard you singing, but it was all in Khelish," explained Shepherd.

"Well . . .umm . . . It's a song about a girl who is in love with . . . her ship's captain," explained Tali, frantically rubbing her palms.

"Well that's pretty standard fare," observed Shepherd. "Is it just a 'I love you' sort of song or is there a story with it?"

"Well there's a complication," admitted Tali. "There's competition, you see, there's a girl he's already is in love with and the singer can't understand why he can't see that the singer is the better match."

"Ah," mused Shepherd. "That seems to be a standard frustration with girls, some other girl already has the guy."

"This song in particular," continued Tali. "Because . . . Um . . . You see . . . Mmmm. . . The ship's captain is human."

"Oh? I didn't think Quarians could fall in love with humans," said John genuinely surprised.

Liara was back, dressed in Phoenix V armor with a 250 shield rating holding up a bright yellow sign with fluorescent pink letters screaming 'This Girl Has!' Tali shot the sign up.

"It doesn't happen very often. But if the human guy does nice things for the girl, and she finds he is trustworthy, and he and she develop a close friendship, under the right circumstances, the Quarian girl bonds with the guy and there is a love relationship."

"So the song is about a Quarian girl in love with a ship's captain who has another girl . . ."

"Human girl," said Tali.

"Human girl," observed John. "That poor Quarian girl, she has a lot going against her."

"Very much so," agreed Tali with a big forlorn sigh thrown in for measure. "You know . . . yust about every girl has at one time or another been attracted to a guy she couldn't have."

"Especially since you refuse to tell him you Stupid Bosh'tet!" Liara's grasp of Khelish in Tali's mind was simply second to none. Noting that the shotgun was ineffective, Tali threw a dozen mental imaged hand grenades at the figment.

Suddenly it became all so clear to John. He gave Tali a look of great sympathy. Reaching out he gave her a big hug and said, "I feel sorry for the girl in that song, I bet that guy is really missing out. I'm even a little jealous." He noted that Tali was trembling under his embrace.

Then he left engineering.

"Poor girl, she's really got it bad," he thought, "To be carrying that torch for Kaiden and knowing that he's fallen for Ashley. Almost wish she felt that way about me."

For a few seconds after Shepherd left, Tali just stood there staggering at what he had just said and what it could possibly mean. Had he figured it out? Was that a hint back? Her stomach was all tied up in knots. She turned around and her heart leapt up into her throat. He was back with a sheepish look upon his face.

"Um Tali, I forgot why I came down here," he explained.

"Yes?"

"Did you see my N7 Torso Chest Armor piece anywhere? I could have sworn I put it away in my locker after our last mission two days ago, but I can't find it."

"Let's see," mused Tali, feeling impish. "Are you talking about the blue armor piece with the N7 logo over the left breast?"

"Yes?"

"With the grey highlights along the sides of the chest and arm bands?"

"Yes?"

"And does this piece have a very big dent from where that armature artillery blast threw some shrapnel into it on Feros?"

"Yes?"

"And with the medi-yel dispenser, grenade belt, and three gun mag on the back?"

"Yes?"

"And the scratches along the lower left side where you keep trying to put your assault rifle on the pistol mag?"

"Yes," answered Shepherd a bit slower. He wasn't sure about the last bit.

Shepherd couldn't see Tali grinning of course.

"Sorry Commander," she said. "I've not seen it for quite some time now, but don't worry, I'm sure it will show up."

"Augh!" shouted Shepherd throwing his hands up. "It's a conspiracy I know it. Everyone is sure it will show up."

He turned to leave Engineering again.

"Well thanks Tali," he said. "I'll keep looking."

And walked out.

Tali simply sat down by the box and felt miserable until the ship's bells rang signaling the Christmas Dinner and gift exchange.

She was sitting next to Garrus as expected but didn't feel particularly chipper. Everyone else around her was laughing and talking and in short being in very good moods. One young crew member was showing pictures of her boyfriend dressed in a red suit with a red conical hat on his head. He looked horribly fat. Another young guy was looking at a picture of what Tali suspected was his family. He seemed nostalgic.

"Interesting display of emotions tonight," observed Garrus. "As well as your mixture of anticipation and misery."

Tali simply leaned on the table.

"I've had a lot on my mind as of late," she said. "And we know in two days we'll be in a major operation on Virmire."

"And if you think I think for one moment you are just suffering from pre-combat jitters," continued Garrus. "Tali everyone who cares about you knows you are nearing a bi-polar state. You're happy and chipper one moment and horribly depressed the next. And you've been this way with increasing consequences since after Noveria."

"Garrus, I . . ." began Tali.

It was at this point that the cook brought over the strangest thing Tali had ever seen. It was a light brown rounded oblong thing, bigger than her head, bigger than even two of her heads. There were two bones sticking out of the back and two crooks of thin brown on either side in the front. Everyone was whistling and cheering.

"What Is That?" she yelped.

"Spirits," muttered Garrus. "I have no idea and what's worse, they're acting like they are going to eat it."

Sure enough, one of the petty officers at their table stood up, pulled out a long fork and knife, and began to slice the thing up. There was a pale white meat underneath the brown covering, which Tali had concluded was the thing's skin, and folks were handing out their plates for it. Then other things were passed about. There was a bowl of red berries in a jellied sauce, mashed tubers with a brown sauce on top of that, orange tubers with an orange sauce on them, rolls of bread, long green seeds of some sort, and wine. Then they started to pull a tan and black gloppy pile of stuff out of the center of the big thing and people were putting that on their plates as well.

"Those are it's insides?" gasped Garrus.

"How is your tube of meat stuff?" asked Tali.

"Tasting better than I've had in a long time," he answered.

"Me too," she answered. "Don't know about human food right about now. Glad I'm dextro."

"Now, back to the bi-polar," proceeded Garrus.

"I have an unresolved dilemma," replied Tali. "And I won't be able to fix it until after we've defeated Saren."

"Are you sure you won't be able to resolve it until then?"

"It's the only way I can stay sane given what I want, and what I know I can't have," she replied.

"That sounds perfectly confusing," answered Garrus. "So what is it you want?"

"What I can't have."

"Ah, one in the same," he mused. "Well that changes the odds a bit."

"Odds? Keelah, not another pool!"

"Oh this is a special one," said Garrus. "It's the betting on when you and Shepherd get together."

Tali would have spluttered but as the visor blocked all facial expression there was no point.

"It's back?"

"No Tali, it's the first time. The last time was mere idle speculation on my part, but that was months ago. I'm surprised you remembered at all, but then again, maybe it's not such a surprise after all."

"It's not going to happen, Garrus!"

"Ah yes, the nose hairs," replied Garrus.

"The nose hairs are no longer an issue," protested Tali.

"See? We're making progress. All that's left are the blocked tear ducts, black heads, clogged sweat glands, missed beard hairs from poor shaving, flakes of skin on the tip of the nose . . ."

"Not the issue!"

"Even more progress!"

"It's not going to happen!" insisted Tali with a low growl in her voice.

"And why not?" asked Garrus.

"This is Commander Shepherd we are talking about, Specter, with his own ship and crew. And I'm a little Quarian bucket head geek who will sneeze in his face the first time he takes my mask off to kiss my nose. Then I will break out into hives and have to be sealed up with anti-bodies for the next week."

"We've been through this already," replied Garrus with a wave of his hand. "You have inflated the commander's status to unattainable heights and you have deflated your status to the lowest of worms. Seriously Tali, where is he going to get a girl from outside of you and Liara? Dr. Chakwas is a bit old for him, and while there are a few other girl's on board in various duties, who are human, they have even lower rank than you."

"There's Ashley," replied Tali.

"Ashley is off the market," answered Garrus. "She made her move on Kaiden this afternoon. There were no prisoners taken."

"Oh?" Tali jumped. "That's so sweet. I knew they made a good couple."

"That just leaves you and Liara and I've not seen her make any moves at all outside of the occasional nice smile."

"He can have any girl he wants!" insisted Tali. "I haven't got a chance."

"Okay," replied Garrus with a sigh. "Point out all those any girls. We're at a Christmas dinner, the entire crew is here. Point them out."

Tali raised her hand to make a few gestures but the hand went half comatose half limp in a halfway suspended posture above the dining table.

"My point exactly," replied Garrus. "The fact is Tali, you're a coward."

Tali turned her face to him and he saw her eyes, glowing quite white beneath the visor. He could also make out the nostrils on her nose expanding and contracting quite dramatically.

"I ought to get my shotgun and . . ."

"It's true," continued Garrus. "And you know it. You're afraid to risk the pain of loss. And so you dither on the edge, not knowing, still hoping, and it's beginning to wear on you."

Tali just sat there.

"You have a choice, Tali. And there's not a spirit above that does not know I want you to be happy, but either tell him or flip off that love switch like a good responsible Quarian before those emotions of yours get you or one of us killed because you've slid into another depression and are not paying attention to the commander's orders."

Tali turned her face from him and proceeded to nibble very coldly on her food. Garrus sighed and commenced to watch the table pass around a plate of small round brown wafers which he later learned where called Chocolate Chip Cookies. In the mean time he resolved to wait out the tantrum she was throwing. Calling a fellow soldier a coward was always fraught with risk, but she needed to have it said. Things were heating up fast with Saren and unless she resolved her emotional issues, there would be a death or two on the team.

Tali had lost all her appetite. She simply looked from one happy smiling face to another. Kaiden was busy buffing Wrex's head plate and Ashley was giggling on the other side occasionally squeezing his arm. Shepherd was joking with Liara and showing her a small bone from the big brown thing which was shaped like a pointed U. Then he had her grab one end and he the other and they pulled. It slipped out of their fingers a couple of times but finally it broke and Liara got the nob at the end. Several people asked Liara what she had wished for and she made a nice saccharine suggestion about wanting Saren defeated and freedom in the galaxy and all that. Or at least it was from Tali's perspective. She was after all, angry at Garrus for pointing out the nasty truth about the whole affair, depressed because she was still convinced that Shepherd would rebuff her, and as a result, there was nothing of that so called Christmas cheer in her bones. Joker, Pressley, and Dr. Chakwas were drinking beer and singing about figgy pudding and good tidings.

And then it was time for the gift exchange. The rest of the crew retired to a White Elephant gift exchange while Team Specter went into the briefing room where a very nice fake Christmas tree stood with a set of packages, each labeled for one of the members of the team.

Shepherd picked up the first package.

"This is for Ashley from Liara," he said.

Ashley opened the package and pulled out a very nice dusty bottle with a very old cork in it.

"That Ash, is Illium brandy, aged 200 years," explained Liara.

"This is . . . Oooo . . . You don't just drink this do you," Ashley replied. She looked into the box. "There's something else."

"A bit of a silly thing which was suggested when I was looking for advice," answered Liara.

Ash pulled out a set of flame decals. Then she rolled her eyes.

"I can guess where these are supposed to go," she groaned.

"On your armor?" suggested Kaiden innocently.

Ashley smacked him on his back.

Shepherd then handed a package to Garrus. He carefully tore open the paper at the tape seals and gently slid the box out of the paper.

"You can just rip it apart if you like," suggested Kaiden.

"Someone worked hard to make this," replied Garrus.

"Thanks," said Kaiden. "I hope you like it."

"You picked this out?" asked Garrus as he pulled out the box smiling. "I think I'm going to like this part of Christmas anyway. A nice sniper scope with infra-red vision. Thanks Kaiden. I think I'll install it after the exchange, and then . . . I get to calibrate it."

"Next, is Kaiden," said John as he handed Kaiden a flat rectangular box.

Kaiden was not one for formality. He simply ripped the paper off and looked at the book inside.

"A Folk Song compilation from Quebec arranged for the guitar. This is really neat," he said.

"I'm glad you like it," said Ashley. "You'll have to sing me the songs, in French."

There was a saucy grin on her face.

"I don't know French," apologized Kaiden.

"Learn it," ordered Ashley.

"Yes ma'am," replied Kaiden meekly.

"Yep, he's her boyfriend alright," chuckled Wrex.

Shepherd stole a glance over at Tali who was seated somewhat slumped in a chair.

"Yeah," he thought. "She knows and doesn't like it."

Liara had a festive red and green envelope handed to her. She opened it up and read the insides.

"Oh how CUTE!" she replied. She got up and gave Wrex a buff on his head plate. "You 'ol softy you! It'll be fun shopping with you. We'll be at the front of all the lines because you'll be looking mean and scary."

"I AM NOT CUTE! I AM KROGAN!" roared Wrex.

"Tali?" continued Shepherd. "I got you for the pool, here you go."

She looked at the lumpy cloth bag he handed to her. It was purple with white swirls and tied with a deep red chord. She untied the chord and pulled out a big box . . . Of dextro chocolate.

"My my," mused Garrus. He looked at Liara and winked.

"It's customary to give chocolate to girls at Christmas," explained John with a smile. "And Liara helped me pick out the selection with the help of Garrus."

Liara winked back at Garrus.

"Does he know what this signifies?" thought Tali, her heart beating like a drum. But there was something else underneath. It was a data pad. She did a quick check of it's contents.

"It's . . . It's the entire readout on all the information we've been able to pick up on the Geth!" she cried out. "I can take this back to the fleet as my Pilgrimagh Gift."

"You've done so much for us," explained John. "I thought it only appropriate that you get something from us that will help you and make your time here worth it. But it really didn't strike me as Christmassy enough so I hope you'll like the chocolate."

"It's . . . It's a wonderful gift . . . Thank you . . . Commander," stammered Tali. There were tears in her eyes. Her heart was beating so hard she was sure everyone could hear it.

"The chocolate or the data pad?" queried Wrex with a big toothy grin. "I personally find chocolate more tasty."

For a brief moment all her defenses were down and she leapt over (or some would say pounced) to Shepherd and as he would have describe it, 'squeezed the stuff-in's out of him.' Then she tapped his forehead with the top of her visor. She held on for another few seconds and found that he didn't let go. As for John? He figured she needed some comfort, for he remained convinced that her sadness was the result of her losing Kaiden to Ashley. So he held on, in typical male oblivion to the fact that Tali was rapidly approaching euphoria as her bonding to him got a little deeper.

But all good things have to come to an end and while Shepherd waited for Tali to let go first, she didn't hold on for more than a few more seconds. She backed up holding her present bag with the chocolate and data over her heart with both hands. She sat down and struggled to stop the tears.

"Wrex?" queried Shepherd. "This envelope is for you."

Wrex took the envelope and sniffed it.

"This had better not be a promise to buy a stuffed pink bunny, Garrus," he said.

"You insult my sense of decorum," protested Garrus. "It's an offer to give you an Omni-tattoo of a big soft pink bunny on your backside if you must know."

Wrex growled and then pulled out his pistol to shoot the envelope open.

"I don't think that will be necessary, it's a very weak envelope," suggested Shepherd. "And that bullet will go through the floor."

"Oh yeah," observed Wrex suddenly remembering they were on a ship sailing through the vacuum of space. He tore the envelope open pulled out a small card and handed it to Liara to read.

"Um, having trouble with my eyes all watery from an allergic reaction today," he explained.

Liara looked at the card. "This is a nice gift credit chit for Bullrush Steakhouse in the Citadel," she said. "Have you been there before?"

"Yeah, Garrus and I both were there the first night we met Shepherd," said Wrex grinning. "Hey Garrus, that's great. Do you join me when I cash this in?"

"I thought you'd never ask," replied Garrus smoothly.

Shepherd just stood there for a moment looking at the square box with the big red bow under the tree.

Tali was sitting next to Garrus as usual. Garrus cleared his throat.

"Oh!" stammered Tali who got up and picked up the big box and gave it to Shepherd. "I got you in the pool," she explained. "I put a lot of time into it. I hope you like it."

"I've yet to see anything you did that I didn't like," replied John.

"Even the shotgun incident?"

"Well that I didn't care for," he admitted. "But we all do something silly sooner or later. No one was hurt and you repaired the ceiling."

He opened the box and pulled out a torso piece of N7 armor with blue color and grey trim. He looked at it for a second.

"See?" suggested Kaiden. "I told you it would show up sooner or later."

"What were you doing with my armor," asked Shepherd slowly.

"Try it on, Commander," suggested Tali, with a bit of stammer in her voice.

John Shepherd put his armor on. It went on smoothly, and . . .

"It fits . . . Nicer," he observed. He took a couple of twists with his torso and began some combat shifts and jumps. "It's lighter too, it's . . . better."

"I worked on it a bit," confessed Tali. "I had to hack your security system to get into your locker to get it since you were not yust laying it around. Kaiden sugyested you might get angry but would probably overlook it if I made your armor really nice. You'll find that you can fit two more grenades into the belt and I've increased the Medi-yel capacity by 25%. And since . . ." Here she paused for a second and her voice took on a quiet awed quality "since you never turn your back on an enemy, I moved some of the armor plating which has never been hit in the back to the front so you're more protected."

Her voice took on a teasing quality.

"And besides, it's probably the only chance I'll have to get into your . . . suit," she suggested.

The proper expression of the Khelish phrase Tali was alluding to would have been to 'link up with' as opposed to 'getting into'. Tali had changed the Khelish just enough so it would translate differently, hoping that John would know what she meant. The problem was that John, along with Ashley and Kaiden thought they already knew what she was referring to, because she had made a human double entendre, and as a consequence completely missed what any other Quarian guy would have immediately grasped. Tali had just dropped a very large hint as to her feelings for Shepherd.

"Well normally you're supposed to buy him dinner and a movie first," quipped Ashley.

"Yeah," joked Kaidn, "He's not that easy. It has to be a nice dinner too and no chick flick for a movie.

"But I do give hugs to sweet and shy Quarian girls who do so many nice things for me," suggested Shepherd who was looking for another excuse anyway. The personal touches to his armor had really moved him in a way he had never experienced before. There was something very kind and gentle about what she had done for him. It was a personal gift in a way he had not expected. Liara felt just a twinge of jealousy.

And he walked over there and gave her another hug and little kiss on the top of her visor.

Tali was just silent for a moment. Her heart was pounding so loudly that she was convinced everyone in the room heard it.

As for Liara, she concluded that if Tali left for the Migrant Fleet without telling Shepherd, then all bets were off and she was going to make sure Shepherd knew she was _very interested_ in him. His reaction to Tali's gift was more than a little eye opening for her. He had a sensitive spot for personal attention. But for now, she would remain loyal to Tali. She had after all, given her word. Even so, she was sorely tempted. But at least since her first encounter with Shepherd she had learned one thing she would have to make sure she didn't do if she wanted to let him know she was interested, and that was to dance naked for him. A few stories about his early life as a Navy brat had enlightened her on how he now felt about the so called Gentleman's Clubs.

Everyone was now chatting or moving about. John was still flexing in his armor and Garrus had already gone off to find his sniper rifle. Kaiden had left to find his guitar and Ashley had followed him, holding on to his arm. Liara had given Tali a little hug and whispered that she hoped Tali would like the chocolate and then sat next to Wrex with her omni-tool and began to scan the extra-net for big fuzzy pink bunnies to buy at the Citadel. Wrex sat next to her trying not to grumble too much.

Tentatively, Tali opened the box of chocolate and took out a piece and ate it.

It was delicious. For a few moments she simply enjoyed the quality and texture of her gift. Then she remembered that if she ate all the pieces, her special gift from John would no longer exist, but if she didn't eat it, sooner or later it would spoil, which would be a selfish wasting of resources, and once again she was miserable.

For Tali, this was the first time she was experiencing Christmas. There was a mixture of good and bad in it. She had gotten some very real and affectionate attention from the guy she was wishing very strongly to fully bond with, and at the same time he remained completely closed off to the idea by his extremely dense male humanity. She had no idea how many more Christmases she would experience in her life. But over the years she would wonder sometimes if she would have enjoyed it more if she had known what would happen shortly. She concluded that in spite of her depression at the time, it was better that she had remained in the dark.

For you see, three days later, after the mission on Virmire, Ashley was dead, Shepherd was angry at having to make the choices which had resulted in her death, and Kaiden was in deep grief, having lost a new found love. It was that last brief moment of happiness before a long line of frustrations which would end in the cataclysmic battle of the Citadel.

Nothing was ever the same after Tali's first, and Ashley's last, Christmas.


	6. Chapter 6 - Anything Could Happen

John Michael Shepherd paced the floor of his cabin. There was still anger and grief over the death of Ashley, but it had been a week since her death and he had worked most of the emotions out. Ashley's death was tragic, it angered him that he was stuck with leaving one of his team behind. It was one of the greatest sins a human commander could commit, the leaving of a companion behind, the abandoning of a comrade in arms. But he had split the team, and when you split your team, that becomes a risk.

"That's the problem with decisions," he grumbled to himself. "They have consequences."

But he would own the consequences. He had to. To seek to blame others would only make him vulnerable to greater vices, and as a commander he would become weaker to his enemies. It was necessary that he do this since any emotional struggle was reflected in his command ability and that could produce more casualties. All good commanders, be they as low as sergeants or as high as generals knew that their emotions and vices were the greatest asset the enemy had.

The mission on Virmire had ended with new discoveries. They had heard Saren's own justifications. They had met Sovereign and knew that ship to be a genuine Reaper. And there had been another Prothean beacon which Shepherd had once again interacted with. Liara had mind melded with him and more sense of the warnings was made. But more importantly, Shepherd's Prothean vision, coupled with Liara's own archeological background and her intelligence work during the prior missions enabled her to conclude with complete certainty that the conduit was on Ilos. The trick was to get there first, but in order to do that, the Council first had to be consulted. The Terminus Systems were independent and jealously guarded their rights. Shepherd hated the delay, each hour spend heading to the Citadel, conferring with the Council, and then traveling to Ilos gave Saren another hour to beat him to the punch. But when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. He had also been thinking about Sovereign and Saren's speeches on Virmire. It was time to throw his theories out to the team and see if they agreed.

He pressed the ship's intercom, "Garrus, Liara, and Tali? Please report to the Captain's cabin, I have a dilemma I need your advice on solving."

And always be specific when making public requests so there could be no misunderstandings. They would now know he was about to take them into his confidence which conveyed trust, but likewise assured the rest of the crew that the three of them were not about to get their metaphysical tush's chewed off by a ticked off Commander. He could have asked for Wrex and Kaiden as well, but this was going to be thinking work and Wrex did not care for that, and furthermore, Kaiden was still very much grieving over the death of Ashley. He needed the time to work it out. But likewise, Kaiden already knew Shepherd would listen to his advice if need be.

Garrus arrived first.

"So what is this dilemma you need my feedback on?" he queried.

"You are Turian and I need insights into Saren's brain," answered John. "Our last confrontation with both Saren, and his ship Sovereign, has forced me to re-evaluate my mission plans. I need to express them and get feedback."

Garrus nodded.

"Finding out that Sovereign was a genuine AI was a bit disconcerting. Benenzia had left us with the impression that Saren was the one with all the mesmerizing charisma and he just had a . . . rather unusual ship," he observed.

"But the clues were already there," added John. "We missed them. Had Saren been the one with the mesmerizing charm, Captain Anderson would have fallen under his sway as well and yet Captain Anderson showed no confusion of thought when he spoke of Saren. No suggestions that Saren had bewitched him at all."

Garrus nodded. It was ancient history, but the story was well known enough. Anderson, Shepherd's immediate superior prior to his promotion to Specter status, had been considered for the position of Specter himself twenty years prior. Saren had been his observer and Anderson was firmly of the opinion that Saren had made sure Anderson had failed. Barring some secret alien mind melt trick Saren had learned in the meantime, Anderson should have been just as much a target and accordingly would have concluded that Saren had nothing to do with the failure of the mission.

Tali came in.

"Commander?" she queried.

"Tali, I'm discussing the mind of Saren with Garrus and was wondering what your insights might be."

"Why?" she asked. "I can understand Garrus, because both he and Saren are Turian and both are connected with the Council and the Citadel. But the only thing I have in comman with Saren is we both have a dextro diet."

"Yes," thought Shepherd for a second. "Why did I ask her in?"

He paused for a moment.

"The Geth and their connection to Sovereign," he finished.

That seemed to satisfy Tali, but it bothered John that he actually had to think up a reason why he had asked Tali. Maybe he was a little jealous of her infatuation with Kaiden after all.

"What the Commander and I have already concluded is that the fact that Saren appears to be just as much under the influence of Sovereign as Benenzia. Which means that we've been working under the assumption that Saren is the intelligence behind the operation and that is wrong," inserted Garrus.

Liara walked in.

"Commander?" she said.

"I asked you in because I need your insights into the latest intelligence we have regarding Saren and his commander, Sovereign," Shepherd said.

Liara nodded.

"The realization that Saren is not the head of that operation came as a surprise to everyone," she said. "But other than a suggestion that we might have to consider desperate measures, I can't think of anything to suggest."

"Really?" asked Shepherd.

It seemed so easy for him to come to the conclusions he was coming to.

"Liara has a point," Garrus pointed out. "We are dealing with a creature who is extremely ancient, extremely powerful, and has the means to dominate the minds of those around it. It seems to be totally unfamiliar with the concept of defeat and shows such an advancement in technology that it regards us as lesser creatures."

"It's going to take some serious technoloyee to deal with Sovereign," added Tali. "And not yust weapons technoloyee either."

"Not a single one of you spotted the flaws in Sovereign?" asked Shepherd, somewhat amazed.

Garrus, Tali, and Liara looked at each other and then back at John.

"Tell me," asked Shepherd struggling in his mind to come up with a way to convey what he had seen in Sovereign. "In your history or literature, do you not have villains who's overwhelming arrogance and deceptive behaviors bring about their own self-destructive downfall?"

"We Quarians have many stories of doing stupid things out of fear," said Tali. "But no one ever imayines they are so powerful that nothing can stop them. We've been exiled now for 300 years because we were no where near as powerful as we needed to be."

"Turians try to cultivate a sense of confidence and we use our accomplishments to convey that to others," commented Garrus. "It's what helps us to be successful. But no one tries to make up things about our capabilities, it doesn't work well in the end, if it ever works well at the beginning. The reason why people put up with Turian . . . arrogance . . . is that we try to stay honest about ourselves."

"We've always sought consensus and harmony," sighed Liara. "Our survival always depended upon it. The idea that we are gods is utterly alien to us. There was always the Goddess, and there were always the Asari."

"So all of you took him at his word. I wonder if the Prothiens did as well. I wonder even more," mused John. "if the fact that our history and entertainment is filled with arrogant lying jerks like Sovereign is the reason why we're going to beat these Reapers."

"Wait a moment," said Garrus. "Are you saying that Sovereign's speech to us about the eternal and all powerful qualities of him and his race sounded to you like it came out of some cheap human adventure vid?"

"Pretty much," chuckled Shepherd. "Of course not all our classics have speeches like Sovereign's, but all of them have villains which act like Sovereign in their actions. Many of our villains, both real and accordingly fictional, throughout history have a rather dull monotonous tone about being the pinnacle of evolution with enlightened thoughts way above that of ordinary poor mortals. The Church . . . The Catholic Church . . ." added Shepherd when he saw quizzical looks from Garrus and Liara, "even has a name for these people. They call them Gnostics."

"Gnostics?" asked Liara. "It doesn't seem to be English. What human language is that?"

"Ancient Common Greek," replied Shepherd. "I only know a bit of it from my school days. It comes from the word gnosis which means, 'to know'. It's meant to be satire from the Church's perspective. In essence, the Gnostics have claimed, from as far back as human history records, and we're talking 7,000 years of it here, that they are the superior beings who know better than we, and are akin to gods. You can see the arrogance in the ancient Sumerian Kings lists, you can see it in the myths of the people of India, the Aryans among others. When Alexander the Great conquered the Mesopotamian and Indus valley 4,800 years later, those ideas were introduced to the West and when the Romans took Greece, they claimed to be their successors and the notions spread throughout all of Europe and from there to North American and the rest of the world. It's popped up again and again in human history, the last catastrophic period being from the end of the 18th century to the end of the 21st century. The Europeans plunged all of the world into a catastrophic set of wars, three of which became known as World Wars, all in the name of enlightened destiny. But the final movement was finally crushed by what we call the Black Russian Crusade, which founded the Alliance. And that's just what I know of the movement. Suffice to say, we humans have heard it all before, and we know nothing comes of it but blood and fire, death and destruction."

"If this sort of attitude is so common among humans that it's become a stereotype, is it not entirely possible that the Reapers were trying to indoctrinate humans and drive them forward to accomplish what Saren is trying now," suggested Liara. "Seeding the ground as it were?"

"An interesting idea and entirely possible," agreed Shepherd. "But if that were the actual case, it was a bad mistake on the Reapers part. And I know this because the Catholic Church has a very meticulous approach to human history and makes sure it's recorded in exquisite detail. Entire historical movements and whole sciences connected with history have been spawned by that institution in it's own 2,000 year history. It's why we know anything about several epochs of our history. In fact that the 18th through 21st centuries are known decently at all is directly the result of the Catholic historical records. Those enlightened despots were very fond of 'correcting errors' in the eye witness accounts, redefining everything so that black was white, sane was insane, beauty was ugliness, truth was falsehood, and ignorance was strength."

"The notions of advanced evolution and thinking beyond our poor mortal grasp might have come from the Reapers trying to build up allies to assist in the next cycle. But if so they made a catastrophic mistake on Earth because each one of these efforts proved to be self destructive. You fill a room up with little enlightened human gods, and sooner or later all of them are dead after trying to proving their higher power to the others. And then along comes a monk in a hair-shirt robe who sits in the room, figures out by deduction who killed who and why, and then writes it all down as a moral instruction on the mistake of thinking you're the big chief of the Zulus."

"So you heard the speech of Sovereign and you were entirely unimpressed," mused Garrus. "I don't know why, but that makes me feel . . . good."

"Yes," said Shepherd. "Allow me to illustrate."

His voice got low and menacing.

"You exist because we allow it, you will end, because we demand it," he began.

"Those who refuse education will not be allowed to persist in thwarting the advance of our tolerant diversity," he proceeded.

"It is the destiny of the German Reich to rule the lesser races," he added.

"All history is the struggle of classes. The rich will die in a sea of bloody revolutions. Communism is inevitable," he continued.

"Our enlightenment reason is here to banish the foolish superstitions you posses by means of madam guillotine," he finished.

"Change the words, change the focus, it all sums up the same," mused Liara. "We're better than you, we know what's best, you will submit or die."

"Precisely," said Shepherd.

"So how does that make us able to beat the Reapers," asked Tali. "I mean Sovereign is the Geth expanded one hundred fold and all our skills were unable to stop them 300 years ago."

"Because we now know who Sovereign and the Reapers are," answered Shepherd. "Allow me to quote another old work, one that's 2,700 years old. 'Know your enemy, and know yourself, and in one thousand battles, you will never be in peril.'" Shepherd paused. "Sun Tzu," he continued. "A Chinese General who defeated an army five times the size of his."

"So how is that going to enable us to defeat the Reapers, if, and I do mean if, they show up?" asked Garrus. "You are yourself in danger of imposing your own view of who the enemy is before the first move in the game."

"Point taken Garrus," replied Shepherd. "Brilliant grasp in fact."

"Naturally," replied Garrus.

"Because if Sovereign is anything like the Human Gnostics, we can be certain of these two facts. First, when the Reapers first manifested themselves . . ." began Shepherd.

"Millions of years ago," added Liara.

"Not true," inserted Shepherd. "That's part of the Gnostic ideology. It's always about evolving over millions of years. It's a very subtle form of propaganda suggesting massive historical inertia which can not be thwarted. The moment you hear evolution over millions of years, and we humans have been hearing it for thousands of years, all the way back to Harappa, you're hearing BS."

"Then how old are the Reapers?" asked Liara, somewhat condescending.

"Don't know," replied John, "and it doesn't matter. Easily over 50,000 years since the Protheans were destroyed by them. What matters is that Sovereign was giving you propaganda designed to impose a feeling of unstoppable inertia. Back to my original point, when the Reapers first manifested themselves, they were likely on the cutting edge of technology for the time."

"And it was impressive," observed Tali. "We're talking the Citadel and the Conduits."

"Yes it was," agreed Shepherd. "And it was so good we've followed it's pathways since. Thus, in the Reapers minds, playing right into their little trap."

"Which Sovereign pretty much said," observed Liara.

"Yes, notice how stupid that would be if one of our generals said as much," replied Shepherd smiling.

Garrus flexed his plates and mandibles.

"I think I am beginning to see your point," he said quietly. "No smart general would boast about the trap he had laid to his enemy _before_ that trap was fully sprung."

"Unless that general had so utterly convinced himself that his intelligence was beyond the grasp of our poor mortal minds that we would blindly fail to avoid it," continued Shepherd. "That's the key you see. My second point in fact. If Sovereign is who I think he is. If the Reapers are who I think they are, they have a modus operendi, brilliant and insightful when first formed, but which they will stick to even after we've determined how to exploit and thwart it. Because the moment they admit to themselves that their modus operendi can be thwarted and exploited, then they are not the enlightened minds beyond our mortal ken that they boast about."

"So we're talking about a way of thinking which literally makes you stupid," said Liara. "You refuse to learn from any mistakes you make, even when it's not apparent you are making them.

"And you can't fix stupid!" chirped Tali bouncing in her chair.

"And what's that Krogan saying that Wrex goes on about," queried Garrus with a Turian smile. "A thousand pyjaks lead by a Krogan is more dangerous than a thousand Krogan led by a pyjak?"

"And as my Catholic Great-Grandmother once said," replied Shepherd. "Bingo."

"What ever that means," said Garrus shrugging. "But I presume you agree with me given your body language. So in other words, while the Reapers are going to have a hell of a first blow, they won't change their tactics and if we can survive the first assaults, we'll figure out the ways to beat them and once we've done that, those methods will work persistently because the Reapers will refuse to allow themselves to be taught by their mistakes."

Shepherd nodded.

"Then why did the Prothians lose?" asked Liara. "Their empire spanned the entire galaxy."

"Obviously the Reapers' first strike paralyzed them," concluded Shepherd. "Like I said, their modus operendi is going to be very very good. The trick is to avoid that first catastrophic blow that the Prothians were unable to avoid."

"The Citadel," shouted Garrus. "That's the perfect first strike. The Council government is there, everything that directs the entire galaxy flows from the Citadel. The first strike will be at the Citadel! If the Reapers succeed there, we'll be even more devastated than the Prothians will be."

"And the Citadel and the Mass Effect Conduits are the Reaper's technology!" added Liara animatedly. "From there they can strike each center with ease and precision. It all fits!"

John smiled.

"Sovereign burbled out the entire summation of Reaper strategy and in return we told him nothing!" exclaimed Shepherd grinning.

"Well now that we've won that war," continued Garrus. "What do we do about Saren?"

"How in hell did Saren get persuaded to see things from Sovereigns' point of view?" asked Shepherd. "It makes no sense. I know what he said. He called it indoctrination. He had used the lab we destroyed to 'protect' himself from it. He had studied it. He said it was subtle. But he would be excepted because he was useful. I find it hard to fathom."

"Why not?" asked Liara.

"Because no sentient being can be made to self-destruct," answered John. "Look at your own mother, Liara. One of the wise and influential Matriarchs of the Asari who proceeds to go to Saren to guide him from this path and ends up believing in it. I'd say Stockholm Syndrome if she were young and stupid, but she was one of the oldest and wisest. And yet . . . And yet she got sucked right in."

Liara seemed to meditate for a moment, though there was pain in her eyes.

"She said he seemed so . . . right," recalled Liara. "Yes, it made no sense that she would fall under such a delusion."

"And that's what we need to worry about," continued Shepherd. "Saren? You could convince yourself he was a rogue. He clearly hated humans, he clearly sabotaged Anderson's Specter chances. But when he said Nilhus was his friend, it rang true. Yet we know that Saren killed him . . . Saren blew his brains out with a pistol shot to the back. On Virmire he tried to reason with me, tried to explain why he was doing what he said. He believed it was inevitable. This was the only way. I got the impression he had learned to respect me, almost admire me the way he acknowledged that I outsmarted the Geth during the attack."

"The dragon teeth of the Geth," observed Tali. "They turned those colonists into those mindless creatures. Creatures who would attack us with no fear. A complete take over of the body. Is there a link also for a lesser taking over of the mind?"

"Is is possible that there is something about Sovereign itself which enables it to 'take over' a person's mind?" queried Garrus.

"It could be something similar to the Thorian," replied Shepherd. "Where pain was administered in the brain until the human agreed to the tasks which the Thorian desired performed. It was, relatively speaking, benign in that the Thorium did not waste it's 'resources'. But you saw infected colonists fighting it. Some of them worked very hard to keep away from the creature. They tried to get as far away from the plant as they could. They struggled. They fought. So it wasn't a direct take over."

He continued, "All self aware species as far as I can tell, have what is known as free will. We get to choose, for good or ill. In order for indoctrination to work, there has to be something in it which persuades the person that they are doing 'the right thing'. I know, at least from a human perspective, that no human can psychologically commit an act they know, without any doubt, to be evil. In order for a human to do any evil they must first, persuade themselves that what they are doing, in this case, is not. That the good they will receive from the action out weights the evil they will be committing."

"So it sounds as if all human evil is performed with an ends justifies the means reasoning," mused Garrus. "Makes humans a rather dull group of criminals but it makes sense given the experience I had with human crime on the Citadel."

"Do you think that Saren has gone through the same psychology? That he has persuaded himself that he's doing what is best?" asked Garrus. His mandibles were twitching and his chin was resting upon his fingers which had been interlocked by his hands into a sort of base. His elbows were on the arms of his chair.

"He had to," concluded Shepherd. "He had to persuade himself that Sovereign's way was the only way something of the Galactic Civilization could be saved. That those who helped the reapers would be able to maintain something of what had come before."

"He actually tried to explain it to me," mused Shepherd. "It was almost as if he was certain I would at least think it out once he explained it. He sounded so reasonable, I almost believed that I could talk him out of it. At least I tried and he seemed to hesitate himself."

"With all due respect Commander," intruded Liara. "Why are we worried about this? Saren is not the power in this attack. He is the lieutenant. It is Sovereign which is the commander, why are we worried about Saren at all? One who has become, for all intents and purposes, a self-deluded tool?"

"Because Saren was a Specter and your mother was a Matriarch," explained Shepherd. "What changed them, can change us. If they are vulnerable, so are we."

There was silence in the room. Liara, Garrus, and Tali looked at each other. Liara shuddered.

We have another . . . catholic . . . saying," mused John smiling and shaking his head. "You'll have to excuse the persistent religious references, I never thought I would need all of these. I'm a soldier, not a theologian. I was happy with Sun Tzu, Clauswitz, and Vegetius. But I see now that while these are great for winning battles, I'm now tasked with the need to win a war, a war which has to be won before it even begins if we are going to have any chance at all."

"Why are you apologizing for it?" queried Liara. "Seriously now Shepherd. I find this human distaste for the concept of the Goddess incomprehensible. We know enough of the universe and how it works to understand that it's creation by a higher power is the only sensible and rational explanation for why it's here."

"And what is this saying?" asked Garrus. "If you are done with apologizing for the so called defects in your education."

"'There but for the grace of God go I,' a saying which reminds humans that not a one of us is immune from the defects we see in others. We have to know how to counter indoctrination or we will succumb to it."

"Well then let's start thinking this through Shepherd," began Liara. "First of all, we know that indoctrination persuaded the best and brightest of us that Sovereign's plan for our extinction was both necessary and inevitable and only those who cooperated had any chance of survival. Second of all, you have told us that we all are free to choose, thus arguing that indoctrination could, in some sense be rejected. So what would make a human, for example, succumb? Because you clearly think that you could be indoctrinated."

John paused for a moment. It was clear he was thinking it out.

"I'm not the expert on this, but as far as I can recall from my childhood instruction, humans commit acts of evil out of two drives; Fear and Lust. Fear is pretty self explanatory and humans counter it with a virtue known as courage. Courage is the exercise of the will to force the body to remain and pursue what it is supposed to be doing even though all our physical sensations are telling us that we need to run and hide somewhere else."

"So it's not a feeling of bravery then?" queried Garrus.

"No, the only time you know you are being courageous is when you are terrified but acting as if you are not."

"And this thing called Lust," queried Liara.

"That is a physical craving for a specific thing or sensation which we do not have a right to," answered Shepherd. "Let us say for example that there is this nice young girl on the beach, laying upon her beach towel, dressed in a pair of strings."

"Why would she even bother?" groaned Liara rolling her eyes.

"Okay, I am walking along and I see this girl, and as I not only find her attractive, I see almost all of her physical body and as is always the case with guys, I get this urge to make love."

"So there's a visual component then?" queried Liara. "I didn't know that. For us it's the smell and biotics."

"Turians have that quality to," observed Garrus, "But it's the men who attract the women. You'll see female Turians always looking at the guys way more than the guys looking at the girls."

Tali suddenly jumped in her chair.

"For us," she said with almost a sigh. "It has to do with sensing the love the girl or guy has that is directed at you. We can't see each other, we can't smell each other, but we feel the other person's attraction."

"Poor kid," mused Shepherd to himself. "Probably why she never told Kaiden, she was thinking he would already know."

"Well this is all very interesting biology," he spoke out loud and chuckled. "But I'm talking about Lust, which is the human disorder about what is ordinarily natural. You see, by experiencing desire for this girl on the beach, I am only experiencing what comes naturally. It's what I do next that determines if it becomes Lust. Now this is a beach, so I can't just up and make love to her because we're talking a public place, there are kids and human kids are not to be exposed to this because they don't have the drive yet and it . . . disturbs them. Second of all, this a reproduction behavior, strangers don't have children together and children which come from such random behaviors are nearly always maladjusted and dysfunctional. Third, you don't just up and make love to a perfect stranger because it's regarded as rude and unwelcome in every manner except when it's done in pornography vids. We humans need a whole chain of requirements before we can make love to a member of the opposite sex in order to be able to do it in such a fashion that there are not unwelcome consequences. Consequently, I have to apply my self-discipline to stop staring, keep walking, and if I find her attractive at all, and I'm smart about it, I make inquiries to find out where she lives and who she hangs out with and I arrange an introduction where she's more adequately dressed and I can clearly get to know her without a flat belly, soft breasts, and limber thighs screaming at me to attack the center. That way I get to know her and if my luck holds out, I find out that she's really shallow and superficial and I'm glad I didn't do something stupid with her."

Shepherd finished with a slight sarcastic snort.

"Well that was enlightening," mused Garrus with a grin. "You have my sympathies Commander, but then again, not every guy gets to be me."

"So you're saying that humans have this desire to do things they don't have a right to," queried Liara.

"Correct," answered Shepherd. "Lust isn't just about sex, it's about wanting another person's property, another girl's boyfriend, my competitor's employee, just about anything which you don't have a right to. The moment you are seeking to gain it when you don't have the right to it, you are engaging in what we call Lust. Lust properly speaking, is all desire for things which don't belong to you or are not allowed to have."

"And that's what drives human evil?" asked Garrus.

"Yeah, fear of pain or desire of something you do not have the right to have. Provided you can come up with some reason, how ever torturous the rational pathway to get there, that gives you the interior justification for your action."

So in other words, this is how indoctrination would work on a human, by either terrifying them into submission, or promising them something appealing they would not normally have a right to."

"It would have to be that way," argued Shepherd. "No human would willingly sacrifice the whole of the human race unless they could convince themselves that the good would outweigh the bad. I can't see any other option at present."

"Then how would a human avoid indoctrination?"

"Self-discipline," replied Shepherd. "You pretty much have to get up in the morning and resolve that you will be a saint all day."

"Well that sounds easy enough," observed Garrus with a droll tone in his voice.

"Sarcasm noted and sympathized with," replied Shepherd.

"But you seem to think this is how humans would succumb," observed Tali. "But you haven't offered an explanation as to how we would succumb."

"I'm not a Quarian, nor am I an Asari, nor am I a Turian," answered Shepherd. "How would Matriarch Benenzia succumb?"

"She would have sought consensus and harmony," replied Liara. She frowned, her forehead furrowed. "I can't find any logical reason which would lead me to conclude that Sovereign's destruction of all galactic civilization would achieve this," she groaned. "I can't get into the mind of my mother on that point."

"I have no trouble with Saren," observed Garrus. "Makes sense in a twisted sort of way. The Reapers are coming, they can't be stopped, if we cooperate, we save something, and we save ourselves."

"But there's no consensus achieved in the complete and total genocide of all those different races outside of the fact that only the Reapers are left to work things out," argued Liara. "There's no harmony in pain and suffering which has to happen in order to render all civilization extinct. My mother's behavior makes no sense."

"Then we're still overlooking something," muttered Shepherd. "Damn!"

He turned to Tali. "Tali? Do you have any thing you've thought out?"

"Only that fear would make the Quarians susceptible," she said. "We scare easy it seems."

John smiled.

"It just makes me want to protect you more," he joked. "It's what makes you so lovable."

Garrus and Liara exchanged "Did you hear what I just heard?" glances.

Tali's heart was once again beating ferociously.

And John was mentally scratching his head wondering why he had just said that.

"Commander?" came Joker's voice over the intercom. "We just finished the transit and are two hours out from the Citadel. Any last requests, you know, like calling up the Council so you can hang up on them one last time or something?"

"Why call them up and hang up when you can in a few hours walk out on them?" mused Garrus. "That's way more satisfactory in my mind."

"Looks like we are at an impasse," concluded John. "We'll need to talk again later on this, hopefully we'll be able to include Kaiden and Wrex next time."

The others nodded and exited. Tali hesitated at the threshold, she rested her right hand on the lintel and looked back at John.

John walked up to her noting her glowing white eyes through the visor were totally focused upon him.

"Tali?"

"Do you really think I'm lovable?" she asked with the slightest shaking chirp in her voice.

"You're a very sweet girl," replied John. "So yes, you are very lovable."

For a very brief moment he was tempted to add, "Just the sort I'd marry." But he didn't.

"Well," said Tali rapidly wringing her palms together. "I think you're lovable too."

She gave him a brief hug and scampered out of the room.

"Not fair, Kaiden," he half joked to himself. "To have two girls interested in you so that when one of them . . . passes on . . . You have the other ready to pounce as soon as she can get up the nerve to do so."

He paused and started to walk back to his desk and the door closed behind him.

"I wonder if Quarians do pounce?" he mused.

Then, in his opinion at least, the craziest image flitted across his mind's eye. He saw a sweet faced girl, with long billowing feathery hair so black it seemed to shimmer blue, with solid mother of pearl white eyes sparkling and flashing in the sunlight, dressed in a body suit with a light multi-colored poncho draped over the shoulders and falling to a perfect point below the knees. She was barefoot in a tree branch above him and trilling to him with a gentle smile. Her feet each had only two long toes which wrapped around the branch so tight he knew she was not in any danger of falling. It was clear she was not human, but what was she? He had no idea and found it strange that such an image would flit through his mind.

But one thing was certain about that brief image. He desperately wanted to love that girl.

But he didn't have too long to ponder on such a curious idea which had settled in his head, he had to get into his gear and report to the Council. And what happened next was the last thing he had expected.

Three hours later he and the entire crew stood before the council, with Ambassador Udina and was informed that any foray into the Terminus Systems was too risky and besides, the fleet was getting ready to deal with any attacks Saren would try against the Citadel. All routes to the Citadel, via the Mass Relays, were guarded. Saren was no longer a threat, let him waste his energies on Ilos, it no longer mattered.

Thanks to the military analysis he had sent them that the Citadel was the target, the Council insisted that the Conduit was no longer an issue. Shepherd had to admit to himself that since the Reaper first strike would be at the Citadel, as it had been with the Prothians, he wondered just what the point of the Conduit was, and why Saren was spending all this time looking for it. The clues had to be on Ilos. There was the reason why Saren still regarded the Conduit as essential to his mission of bringing the Reapers back. They had to get to Ilos. There was still something which was being overlooked. The questions had to be answered or the element of surprise was not necessarily lost like the Council and Udina insisted it was.

It didn't matter that the Normandy had the best stealth systems in civilized space, the Council was convinced that because he had used a nuclear device on Virmire, he would use it again. Or do something just as outrageous. Or was that just another excuse?

Shepherd argued, he pleaded, he explained, and he was told flat out that the Reapers were just a myth. He was being played by Saren. His reference to Sovereign's holographic image, his boastings, the fact that behind him were Garrus, Kaiden, Liara, Tali, and Wrex who had all seen and heard that message from Sovereign was merely dismissed because after all, he had first seen the Reapers 'in a vision'. Saren's mocking "are dreams to be entered as evidence now?" query from the first meeting of the council back in the late days of August was coming back to haunt John in spades.

"You don't want to believe!" Shepherd finished. "And everything you say reflects that!"

And they grounded him with Udina rather smugly explaining that all this was going to help humanity advance further into the Council's trusted inner circle.

"You're selling us out, you bastard," snapped Kaiden.

"Human treachery at it's best," snorted Liara in response, quietly to Tali.

Tali nodded.

Quietly, slowly, and dejectedly the team returned to the Normandy. Shepherd took off his armor, stuck it back into his side locker, and sat on the deck in front of it feeling like the world was coming to an end. And given the threat the Reapers posed, his feelings reflected a reality which was not a little terrifying. For the Protheans, the world's ending had begun very much like this.

A pair of black, steel metal, and purple shoes which reminded John of a curious duck stood in front of his gaze. Slowly lifting his head he saw that the duck had two knees on each leg, one in back and one in front, a wide set of hips, a delicate bust size, a long neck, and a visor. He smiled in spite of the circumstances. Tali could always be counted on to be unconsciously cute at the most eccentric of moments.

"Shepherd?" she chirped.

"Tali?" he replied. "I don't know why, but right now you've made me smile."

"I want you to be happy," she said.

"I want you to be happy to," he replied.

She was trembling. John could see she was trembling. But she plowed ahead and began to talk.

"Anything could happen. Ashley's death and Kaiden's grief taught me that. I've been trying to work up the courage to tell you now for the past few days. It's selfish of me I know. So much is riding on what happens next. We could be dead in a few hours. But . . . I trust you. You are brave, the bravest man I've ever seen. You never turn your back on the enemy, you never stop trying to find a way to save us . . . to save perfect stranyers. And you care about each and every one of us. I know you cried when Ashley died. I saw the streaks of tears on your cheeks even though you tried to wipe them off before you came out of your cabin. You didn't clean yourself up enough. You never really do, you always miss a few hairs when you shave. And I'm starting to babble. It's a defense mechanism I know and it's really stupid of me because it just puts off what I'm really trying to say. But even though I know I'm a fool to be doing this, I wanted you to know . . . I love you. I've loved you since we were driving back from Peak 15."

There a comes a particular strand of music or that line of poetry or facial expression on a painting which suddenly becomes so beautiful that you want to laugh and cry at the same time. There comes that moment in an early June's day when the sun is obscured by clouds and yet the roses seem redder than they've ever been. There comes that moment on a mid October's day while driving down the streets of an old neighborhood that the oak leaves are a brilliant deep indigo, instead of their ordinary brown dead. There comes that moment where the sun glistens on the ice covered branches while you are struggling on slick frozen sidewalks trying to get to your next college class. That brief moment of incredible beauty shining bright, in the midst of mundanity and struggle.

John was simply stunned, and overjoyed at the same time. But as is so often the case with guys in the midst of incredible discoveries of joy, he said something rather silly.

"I thought you were in love with Kaiden?"

"What?! You silly bosh'tet, why would I be in love with Kaiden, especially since Ashley was so attracted to him?"

"That song," explained John. "The ship's captain the engineer is in love with who has another human girlfriend. Kaiden and Ashley?"

"Ship's Captain and Enyineer!" chirped Tali testily. "You and Me!"

She seemed to have stopped trembling. Now she was back to her ordinary self, but only for a second. Then her shoulders drooped and she seemed a little smaller and tired.

"Well I've said it. You can send me back to the Migrant Fleet with my Pilgrimagh Gift. I'll understand of course."

"Tali."

"Silly of me to be in love with you I know. Humans and Quarians, dashing commander with a girl who can't take off her mask without breaking in hives, who develops a fever and sneezes every time he kisses her."

"Tali," John said it slower and a little more insistent.

"You'll save the galaxy, I know it. And all the Asari maidens and young Human girls in the navy will be at your beck and call and you won't have to worry about levo and dextro and immune systems and alleryies and . . . well we never completely bonded so I'm sure I'll get over it . . ."

"Tali!"

"But it was such a wonderful dream I didn't want to let go of it, probably interfered with the mission at times . . . (sighs) I was such a selfish . . ."

She clearly wasn't listening. She was going through a speech she had probably practiced a thousand times. There was only one thing to do. John stood up and grabbed her and held her as close and firmly as he judged sufficient to convey mutual feelings. There was a moment of limpness in Tali's response, but it swiftly got tighter and more firm.

"Call me John," he said.

"Yawn? Why Yawn?"

"Because it's what family, close friends, and . . . It is what I want the woman that I am in love with to call me . . . John."

She was trembling in his arms again. Her hands were working their way up his back, then they did something he had never experienced before from a woman returning his hug. Her two fingers on each hand wrapped about the shoulder bones and locked on tight. He was amazed at how tight and strong her fingers were. There was incredible strength there for a set of fingers not as thick as his own. It was a curious way to hug, but it was also a very hard to escape type of hug as well. It felt as if she could hang off of him if necessary. The pressure was not entirely comfortable, but he wouldn't have traded it for anything.

"Yawn? Did you yust say you . . . loved me?"

"Yes Tali I did. I've loved you since . . . Well now it's so obvious though I didn't catch it at the time. I was in love with you from the moment you came into my cabin and asked to drill with Liara. So call me . . . John."

"I will Yawn," she said looking at him. As the gentle reader might have already noticed, Tali could not say the Juh sound. And since Yohn does not necessarily sound to gentle readers like what Tali's rendition of the name actually sounded like, the author chose to substitute the word Yawn. It is not meant to suggest that in the middle of this romantic revelation of joy between two people who had just come to realize how dense they had been in regards to each other, the heroine suddenly found the hero devastatingly boring. But now that we have set what Tali's rendition of John's name actually sounds like, the author will from hence forth employ the spelling Yahn.

There was nothing more John wanted to say, and so for a moment Tali leaned her head on his shoulder. Then he began to hear little meepings from her and the familiar whifting of her visor cleaning off her tears.

"You're holding tightly the guy you are in love with. He's just said he's in love with you. And you're crying?"

"I'm (meeps) so (whift whift whift) happy," she sniffled. "Liara kept telling me (meeps) that I needed to (whift whift whift) tell you but . . . I was so scared you would say no. Garrus even called me a coward at Christmas."

John felt a new sensation, Tali had just caressed the back of his leg above his ankle with her boot. He felt as if she were trying to wrap her foot around it. It was new and different and he had never experienced something like that before. But it only lasted for a second.

"Tali are you telling me that everyone on board knew you were in love with me except me?"

"No Yahn, only Garrus, Wrex, Kaiden, Liara, Yoker, Ashley, Dr. Chakwas, XO Pressley, Engineer Adams, and um . . ."

"Never mind," he sighed.

"I don't know how this is going to work," she started again. "I'm sure there is some way it can, there have been other Quarian girls who have had bondings with human males, but I don't know how they did it. I'll have to research . . . because I don't want some . . ."

"Cheap imitation," ended John. He smiled. "I remember that silly little shout you did as we were driving back in the snow. When you, Kaiden and . . . Ashley . . . were driving me crazy with your snow songs."

"Oh Keelah," she groaned.

Then she looked up at him.

"And you said what I wanted was worth wanting, and that you wanted me to get it."

"Yeah," chuckled John. "There I was, telling you that you were going to get me and I didn't even know I was doing it."

John looked down at her visor and she looked up at him. He could see the faint outline of her nose and the two glowing ovals of her eyes.

"I want you to see what is under this damn helmet. I want to feel your lips on mine. I want . . ."

"I do to," whispered John. "But until we figure it out, we're just going to have to do other things together. We humans call it courtship and it's designed to be full of romance. Like maybe, taking you to Ryuusei's Sushi like you've blackmailed Garrus into doing?"

"Oh you know about that?"

"Garrus grumbled about it during a brief recon on Feros where you and the rest of the team were staying by the Mako to make sure there were not any more Geth nearby to blow the thing up."

"We've lost two Mako's now haven't we in spite of all our precautions," joked Tali. "I've not collected from him yet. And I'd really like going there, but you know where I'd like to go first?"

"Where?"

"Bullrush," she said. "Where we had our first team dinner together. And I got the best meal I had ever gotten on my pilgrimage and Wrex threatened to knock my head upside so hard . . . And you did that silly little pretend I had broken your heart when he hugged me."

Tali giggled with a sort of whistling hooting meeping sound.

"Okay, we'll go to Bullrush and we'll do it in a few . . ."

"Commander?" queried Joker bursting in on the intercom.

Tali and John almost instinctively leapt apart.

"Joker have you been spying on us?" snapped John.

"Like I'm going to know where you are when I'm sitting in my pilot's chair with my back to the entire ship and you could easily be one or two decks down? Sheesh Commander what were you doing that makes you act like I just caught you doing a naughty boo boo?"

"Yoker? What's a naughty boo boo?"

"It's what bad little boys do that make their mothers cry," replied Joker. "Hi Tali, you're with the Commander too then?"

"Yes Yoker, I am."

"Well that explains why your Commander jumped. I guess she finally told you 'eh?"

"You're on the intercom with the entire ship, Joker!"

"It's not as if everyone on the ship doesn't already know, Commander. I mean Tali is not exactly the most subtle girl when she has a crush on a guy. Every time you walked by she would get all bouncy and cutesy stuff. I swear I was expecting to see rainbows and butterflies showing up any second most days."

"Oh Keelah."

"Anyway, Captain Anderson called and wants you to meet him at that nightclub Flux as soon as you can. Since I knew you were on the ship, I thought I would just broadcast it rather than make you come up here and all that. I got the impression he has an idea he wants to talk to you about."

"Did he say what?"

"No, only that it was important."

"Thanks Joker."

Tali looked a bit slumpy.

"We'll talk to Anderson and then we can go to Silversun from there," suggested Shepherd. "You and me!"

Tali grabbed his hand and the two of them dashed up the rounded hallway, to the command deck, to the air-locker, and left the ship with Joker grinning behind them and shaking his head.

And two hours later, after Shepherd had conferred with Anderson, Anderson had walked into Udina's office, punched his lights out, hacked Udina's computer, released the Normandy's lock down codes, and Shepherd and Tali had returned to the ship, the Normandy was through the Conduit to the Terminus Systems for Ilos.

"My first date with the man I love, at the steakhouse where I first started to like him," grumbled Tali to John shortly thereafter. "And because I agree to take a five minute detour to Flux, you start a mutiny, steal a ship, and run off to save the Galaxy. Are you going to dash any more of this young girl's hopes and dreams?"

"I love you too," replied John.


	7. Chapter 7 - Promise Me

Stealing the most stealthy ship in a human navy is the sort of event which humans more than admire, they end up writing stories and songs about it. Criminal scum steal purses from little old ladies, and probably knock them down while doing it too. Men of dash, daring, panache and romance steal crowns from the heads of little old lady queens. Either way the little old lady gets robbed, but in the second event, she's supposed to just melt in romantic bliss as he removes the valued item from her brow. That's the explanation if she happens to be on the floor after he took it anyway.

Accordingly Tali's heart was going a pit a pat, in the Quarian fashion of course at the sheer adventure of it all, provided of course she didn't stop to think about the consequences if their risk proved to be less than a match for Saren's forces or worse, they had completely misread the situation. The Council would not say, like in some cheesy afternoon Soap Opera Vid, "that's okay, we understand."

But for the first few hours of the one hundred and thirty six that were spent flying from the Citadel to the upper atmosphere of Ilos she was in a very good mood. Her fears of rejection had vanished in the arms of John, and she was utterly swept off her feet in joy and euphoria as her bonding to him got that much deeper. Everyone in Engineering already knew so they only smiled as she bounced all over the deck going from one job to the next. Even so, worries began to pluck their strings around her head as she began to play things out as to what was going to happen next.

She needed to find out for certain just how dangerous levo food was. She needed to know just how allergic her reaction to John would be at first. But also, she was terrified that should John die, she would go to pieces or worse, want to kill herself. She also was terrified of going to pieces once she left the Normandy and returned to the Migrant Fleet. She and John had not worked out that puzzle yet and it filled her with foreboding.

She needed to find out everything she could about Quarian bonding, without any one on the Migrant Fleet (especially her dad) finding out. She had to be sure. She knew some stuff, but the education given to her before she set out on pilgrimage was deliberately short and to the point. Levo food was bad, very bad, don't eat it even if you are starving. Don't fall in love, don't bond, especially with an Asari or Human or Turian. Bad Bad Bad, trouble in spades. Stay in your suit if you love life. Come back to the fleet, give us your gift, and then we'll talk about your adventures.

She needed to be discrete about this. So she decided to send a query E-Mail letter on the extra-net to the one person she knew she could trust on the Migrant Fleet, Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay. Shala had been her mother's mid-wife when Tali had been born and had linked up suit environments to achieve it. Knowing Tali from the moment she was a little squeaker, as her 'Aunti Raan' put it, had led to a long relationship of trust and loving advice, especially after her mother had died and her father had grown distant.

The letter went like this.

_Dear Auntie Raan,_

_Well things are crazy here on the Normandy, and I will be returning to the fleet as soon as we defeat Saren which looks to be very shortly now. We know where he is and we are heading there. So things could be finished within the week._

_So I got to thinking. Now that I will be finished with my pilgrimage I kind of think I would like to find a nice bond mate and start my own family. But I really don't know what it's all about. I mean I know the physical stuff, you don't have to send me medical illustrations or anything. Please don't! I'm more interested in the bonding qualities. Like, how far away can I be from my bond mate before it starts to really hurt and interfere with my work. I have a lot of friends here on the Normandy and I could end up later coming back and working on a Human or Turian or even Asari vessel given the reputation I've made for myself here. Engineer Adams says I'm the best he's ever seen and has expressed regret that I will be leaving shortly. He's really helped me feel good about my work, but don't worry about me bonding with him Auntie. Do you know how many pores in a human's facial skin they've got? And they are always so dirty and clogged up. UGH! They are not a pretty people._

_The next thing I need to know is this. Just how dangerous is Levo food? Dr. Chakwas has informed me that the real problems are two fold, allergic reaction and lack of nutritional value. She says that the food is not necessarily poisonous like I was given to think by my Pilgrimage instructor._

_Which brings me to the final question. Just how dangerous is it for me to not have my suit on or my visor off? There are times in the ship's ducts when I need to spot metal fatigue and the visor really messes with my detail vision. If I could just remove it for a second on occasion, how risky would that be? This situation with Saren is getting very dangerous and we are having to take some serious risks and I need to know every single edge I've got._

_I love you,_  
_Keelah Selai_  
_Tali_

She looked it over.

"Perfect," she thought. "I have a reason for all three of my questions which sounds perfectly legitimate and there's no hints that I've started bonding with Yahn."

She sent it off through the Extra-net and got back to work. Two hours later she got this reply back.

_Dear Tali,_

_Really if you think you're going to fool your Auntie that way then you are going to have to work much harder. In all your letters you have talked about Captain Shepherd. You've told me a hundred things about the way he talks, what he does, how brave he is, how he kept encouraging you, and of course how wonderful the chocolate was. And all that before you even started to talk about the Pilgrimage Gift he also gave you. You have mentioned the others, of course, but far far less. Then I get an letter from you which doesn't mention him at all, and the first thing you talk about is bonding, then levo food, and then **getting out of your suit!**_

_Your father would blow an air lock if he found out, but he won't from me._

_Tali, I can only say "Don't!" A human will break your heart. They have such a well deserved reputation for treachery and deceit. And if you do fully bond with him and he leaves you? You'll never be able to love another again and your life will be one of bitterness and despair._

_But I will send you a book in the off chance that I'm guessing wrong. It's a general education book by a Salarian by the name of Dr. Mordin Solus titled, "What Makes Quarians Bounce?" He writes a very easy to understand description of Quarian physiology and psychology as well as all our bonding issues. Hopefully full knowledge will put some sense into your brain._

_I love you,_  
_Keelah Selai_  
_Aunti Raan_

Tali groaned and rolled over on her back and she re-read the reply. But there was a book attached and she started the download process. Then she returned to work, only to go back to check the progress of the download one more time, and then one more time, and then one more time, and then maybe . . . just one more time.

Twenty minutes to completion . . . Eighteen minutes and fifteen seconds to completion . . . Sixteen minutes and twenty-two seconds to completion . . . Thirteen minutes and nine seconds to completion . . . One hundred and eighteen hours, forty-five minutes, thirty-seven seconds to completion . . . "COME ON YOU BOSH'TET!"

Then she found she had forgotten what it was she was supposed to do with the valves. Then she forgot if she had checked on what it was she was supposed to do with the valves. Then she forgot if she had finished the work on the valves.

Exhausted and impatient, she shut off her omni-tool, and retired to her pod to see if she could get a cat nap and when she had rested for a half an hour, then the book would be downloaded. And when she got to her pod and crawled in, she realized that by shutting off the omni-tool, she had interrupted the download and would have to start all over again.

After an hour's cat nap, feeling a little better, she finally got the book downloaded, saved it, and went back to work. Then she went to dinner and sat next to John and signaled Garrus to join her on the other side.

"Well I'm in a good mood," Garrus replied as he sat down.

"So am I," observed Tali.

"Fancy that," drolled Garrus. "I never would have guessed. Let's see, is it because you have a new mod for your Omni tool?"

"I think you know," teased Tali. "I think every one on the ship knows."

"Even I know now," observed John with a wry grin as Tali gave his arm a big squeeze and head rub.

"Yes, which reminds me," observed Garrus. "You own me fifty credits."

"I do?" queried John. "I don't remember betting on anything."

"Well it wasn't a formal bet. The day after Christmas I challenged you with the statement that 50 credits said you would be an item with Tali before I finished calibrating the guns on the ship. And you said, and I quote, 'You're on 'cause I know she's in love with Kaiden.' For the sake of your reputation as an on the ball and invariably right commanding officer, I choose to let you live with the delusion. But the 50 credits would be a nice gesture on your part."

Laughing John pulled out his omni-tool and transferred 50 credits to Garrus' account while Liara brought her own food tray over and joined the table.

"Oh well," sighed Liara with an exaggerated heave of the shoulders. "I guess I'm going to have to wait for the next dashing human captain to arrive on the scene before I can get my share of beddy-bye fun time."

"Oh come on now!" protested John. "Not you too."

"Commander Shepherd," began Liara. "You are the most brilliant, skilled, and courageous commander I have ever encountered. But when it comes to women, you are so dense!"

"But to see Tali this happy," she continued. "It's a worthwhile sacrifice."

And she gave him a cheesy grin.

"Liara!" said Tali, sounding just a little shocked, and territorial. "You didn't tell me this before did you?"

"In fact Tali," replied Liara. "I did and you did give me permission. But as you were my first and only friend, I resolved to keep out of your way on the matter. But I will tell you as a friend, watching you sitting there saying nothing day after day was very hard for me. I came close to unleashing the scent on more than one occasion when I was in Shepherd's proximity."

"But you finally opened up and that's over with. You're happy, and I'm happy for you," she finished. Her tone wasn't entirely convincing from Tali's perspective, but Tali did remember that yes, she had given Liara permission to pursue that night after Peak 15.

"I am happy, Liara," replied Tali. "And thanks, for what it's worth, for pushing me to fess up."

Just the same, the two didn't talk that much the next two days.

Kaiden was finally coming out of his shell and he likewise walked up to Tali in engineering the next day and told her how lucky John was to have her.

"He thought you were in love with me for some reason or another," joked Kaiden. "Right now I kinda wish you had been."

Tali gave him a hug.

"You were there for me when Yahn put me through the hell of drill, Kaiden. I hope I can be there for you now that you mourn Ashley," she said.

"Thanks, Tali," he said. "But if we're wrong on this, hugs are not going to pull us out of the fire that the Council will throw us into."

And that began to worry Tali more and more.

As the hours leading to planet fall on Ilos slowly (or swiftly depending on if she was with Yahn or not) diminished she fell into a little routine. She got up, joined Yahn for breakfast and they talked about command and engineering issues, then she want to work and joined him again for lunch and talked about command and engineering issues, and then she went back to work and joined him for supper and talked about command and engineering issues. She found that he did not know that much about engineering and she didn't know much about the psychology of command but even so, he seemed to learn something about the Normandy's systems and she was learning a little about how men were led and what you lead them into.

And then she would seek out some isolated corner in the ship and start to read the book she had been given.

She learned that levo food was not poisonous, but it lacked almost all nutritional value. In fact, several spices which were added to Quarian dishes were levo in the way dextro spices were added to human dishes. Humans were even known to deliberately eat dextro foods to feel full if they were dieting. There was even one popular food, known as celery, which was so utterly lacking in nutritional value to humans that they expended more calories eating it than they gained from it's digestion. The real problem was allergies.

The Quarian immune system was not gone as she was led to understand. It was however, extremely sensitive to change. The whole issue was due to the way the Quarians interacted with Rannoch. There were no insects on Rannoch, and while much pollination was done on the wind between plants, the mammals and birds of Rannoch had taken up the insect's duties there. A Quarian child, born on Rannoch would have rapidly, in his early post-birth youth, adapted to the pollens and spores there so that he might be covered in a multitude of them and not suffer allergic reactions. In fact, Dr. Sollus even went so far was to speculate that Quarian children born on any planet, would rapidly adapt to that planet. It was the moment you went somewhere else that the allergic reactions would occur because the individual would not have had the means to rapidly adapt to the new atmosphere. The Quarians, by virtue of their 300 year exile on the Migrant Fleet, were cut off from all genuine adaptation. Thus any left over detritus from Quarians returning from Pilgrimage, any new exposures from atmospheres could be deadly if exposure was prolonged and sufficient enough. Adults could adapt, but it took far far longer than children and it had to be very much controlled.

On one hand it was excellent news. It meant that over time, in an intimate setting, like Shepherd's cabin, she would be able eventually to be without her suit provided of course no one new walked into the cabin. It wasn't so much the germs, though during allergic reaction it could be a serious issue, it was the pollens, spores, and mildews which were the threat. A clean room was not so much as sterilized, a clean room was a triple filtered atmosphere after a prolonged period of deep molecular cleaning.

On the other hand, any chance she would have to have an ordinary ideal life with him would require a planetary home and a prolonged gradual exposure to it. Ship life would mean suit life.

She found Dr. Solus' writing style somewhat hard to follow. It was rapid and clipped, like when she started to read up on bonding.

_"Quarian bonding, different from Salarian bondings. Salarians don't bond. Make contracts for mating. Meet mate. Engage in reproductive behavior when nothing better to do. Waiting for test results perhaps. Mate lays egg clutch shortly. Eggs hatch in warm sand. Children leap out, cute, young, curious, inquisitive, sneak into lab, press buttons, spill chemicals, break equipment, unleash plasma bolt which makes new window, hits car, ruins finish, melts engine block, leaves three meter wide opening in wall, devastates neighborhood homes, leaves planetary orbit, hits Batarian merchant fleet, provokes inter-stellar war. Fifteen minute sit in corner seems insufficient."_

Dr. Solus seemed to have a rating system which measured depth of bonding between the various species. While the Quarians were very monogamous, there were actually animals on earth which were just as monogamous. Certain breeds of Geese, an aquatic foul, mated for life and when the mate died, like the Quarians, the goose did not seek another. Of course Quarians had developed their own peculiar kind of loop hole to the bonding process. For example, young girls were reputed to install nerve stimulators so they might have some of the 'fun' of bonding without actually doing it and thus keeping themselves from too much devastation when the boy proved faithless. Tali was quite aware that the 'repute' wasn't just idle speculation. She knew several of her friends who had availed themselves of the modifications and had experienced brief flings with others. But likewise, some Quarian girls had found out that even 'pretend' carried with it bonding issues which sometimes led even to death, if sufficient red sand was involved. Sooner or later, the girl really wanted to lose that suit. And yes, even she was being horribly tempted, so tempted that she had actually gone so far as to look in the extra-net at prices and types. So far she had not ordered anything. Yet.

Salarians knew about friendship, but for them reproduction was a business contract. Each Asari was perfectly capable of rearing a child on their own, the father of the Asari was perfectly capable of being inconsequential to the rearing, though some relationships lasted a very long time and young Asari did idealize the idea of a soul mate for their entire lives. But even then when it threatened to become reality, young Asari often got cold feet. Like Quarians, humans were supposed to mate for life, but the history of humanity seemed to be filled with humans who were always looking for the loopholes. Tali found it fascinating that human divorce rates went from as high as 50% to as low as .1% based on the time, culture, and nationality. But while one nationality would be very faithful in marriage in one century, that would change over time, always in flux, but usually with rising levels in unfaithfulness until that nation would suddenly convulse and cease to exist as an entity. Human treachery it seemed, was very self-destructive. Humans didn't just betray other species, they betrayed each other and even themselves.

New fears began to gnaw on Tali's psyche. She had a sneaking suspicion that Dr. Mordin Solus had been sent precisely to put doubts in her mind.

So why was she attracted to Yahn?

Dashing commander rescues a young girl in peril and takes her with him to save the galaxy? Seriously now, how many girls ever got to meet that sort of guy to begin with? He was brave. It was the courage he had that led her to anchor herself to him. He never turned his back on the enemy. How many times had she noticed that, wondered at that, depended upon that. Here was a man who faced all the things she was afraid of. Here was a man who proved more stalwart than any Quarian guy she had grown up with. If she were to find out he wasn't even scared of spiders, it would not surprise her a bit.

It certainly wasn't his looks that's for sure. The only thing she liked about his face was his eyes. She could stare into his eyes forever, watching those shifts of hues in his irises, watching his little pupil expand and contract as he talked or shifted his gaze.

And his ears were cute. All those curves and twists and ridges. Like poorly made bowls stuck to his head. She fantasized jumping up on his back, holding on to his ears, and having him run around the room while she steered with them making vroom noises. Of course if he ever let her do it and someone saw them she would be mortified.

But he came from a race of the treacherous. Why would, why should, she think he was going to be faithful?

Eight hours out of Ilos, all the fears reached a boiling point. She went to his cabin as the night shift began and went right in. She didn't even knock.

Quarians are territorial that way.

John was already in his sweats when he turned to see her enter. He noted she was trembling.

"Tali?" he asked.

She walked up to him and just held him. She said nothing. She just locked on to his shoulder blades and held on as if everything in the world depended upon it.

"I'm . . . I'm scared Yahn. I can't stay in my pod alone. Every single thing that can go wrong with the mission, with us, is haunting my every waking moment. I need to be with you. To hold you. To be able to hold on, knowing you won't be afraid."

He never would tell her. But he wasn't exactly feeling Captain Courageous then either. The horrible risk they were taking, the fact that they were going to have to sneak into a system which could be crawling with Geth ships. It was taking a persistent act of will to silence the voices which suggested that even now, there might be a lesser punishment if they returned to the Citadel and surrendered. This so much depended on them being so completely right, in spite of all the great and powerful minds which were arrayed against them on both sides. He needed her holding on to him as well; very desperately needing her holding on.

"Then bunk with me tonight, Tali," He said. "Please?"

"I'd like that a lot."

He set the alarm for seven hours ahead. He lay down and waited for Tali to join him.

For a second she just stood there. This was such an important step for her, to share something this close, this intimate, with him. Keelah she wasn't even going to be taking off a glove, let alone her suit. That would have to be a very slow process. But even so, what it stood for, what it suggested, what it promised, now that it was here, she was frightened. Gently, gingerly, she sat down on the edge, felt along the sides with her hands. She slowly lowered herself into the bed next to him, and then shifted so she could nestle her head on his chest and listen to his heart beat.

They lay like that for about fifteen minutes. The heart beat was good noise. It made her feel secure. She was thinking she would shortly fall asleep upon his chest, and for her that was the most wonderful thing that could possibly happen.

"So what are you most afraid of Tali?" he asked.

"Yahn? I've been reading about human divorce rates," she answered. Her eyes were closed. She was so relaxed. She felt that he would say something that would make it all go away.

"Yeah," he said quietly. "I suspected sooner or later you would hear about that. I don't for a moment pretend that alien suspicions about humans are entirely without the facts backing them."

"Tell me you would never betray me Yahn! Tell me you'll always be true. Tell me you want to be with me forever. Tell me that when we bond, when we make love, we will be bond-mates until our deaths," she whispered, almost pleading.

John sighed. He struggled for a moment. An hour of truth was upon him. How to be both faithful and factual at the same time.

"There's a tale they tell, of an ordinary boy, who met a fairy princess. She was so beautiful that he vowed to protect her from all harm. And sure enough, one day he saved her from an evil wizard and she promised to marry him. But first, he had to understand that she would never undo her hair in his presence, and he must never undo the bow which held it up. Lightly he made that promise. And he thought he would keep it. But one night as she lay sleeping in the moonlight, looking as beautiful as ever, he could not resist, and lighting a lamp, he undid her hair and let it rest around her shoulders. She was so beautiful that he gasped in delight. But she heard the gasp and she woke up and told him that she was now going to have to return to the moon, for he had broken the bond she had with earth, and could never come back. And while he begged and pleaded, she rose up and drifted away, and he never saw her again. And he lived the rest of his life looking at the moon and sighing, until one night he did not watch his step, fell into a bog, and drowned."

"That's a sad story Yahn," sighed Tali. An idea began to form in her head. It was perfect. She would know.

"Earth is filled with them," replied John. "Fairy tales to warn our children of the eternal consequences of evil. Of faithlessness. But lightly we make our promises when we are young. Lightly we think we will keep them. Then the mood comes, the dark spirit whispers, and so many fall away because we lie to ourselves and say, 'we won't be caught' 'our fairy princess won't wake up'.

"Yahn? Close your eyes Yahn. Close them tight and don't open them until I say so. No mater what happens, keep them closed."

John hesitated for a moment. He looked down at Tali who was now resting upon his chest with her arms folded underneath her. He could feel her shift so that her two feet worked themselves around the back of his legs above his ankles. She was looking at him through her visor. All he could see was those two pale white eyes, flat white. Devoid of all detail. Just a white oval glow.

"I'm going to be your fairy princess, Yahn. And I say shut your eyes until I tell you to open them," she whispered.

"Okay Princess," he said smiling. He closed them.

For a second there was silence. But he kept them closed. Then he heard a little hiss. There was a curious smell which wafted across his nose. And then he felt a kiss. Two lips where pressing upon his lips. It was a sweet taste. A gentle pressure. If he opened his eyes he would see her face. In the darkened room. Would she be beautiful? It's what she wanted. She had told him so just a few days ago. She wanted him to see what was behind that damn helmet.

"FOOL! CLOSE YOUR EYES OR SHE GOES TO THE MOON!" the voice inside his head screamed so loudly that he almost swore it wasn't his own thoughts recognizing what she was doing. He pressed his eyes together and held them shut as if his eternal happiness was utterly dependent upon it and he had no doubt at that moment it did.

She looked at him. She had seen the eyelids start to loosen, then he had frowned, his brow had furrowed. He had trembled in her gaze, and then he was squeezing his eyes as hard as he could. She could see the pressure, she could see the struggle, and she saw him once again face his enemy, and win. He would not succumb to the dark whispers. She smiled and felt a tear form on her eyes.

He felt the lips again. He pressed his eyes even tighter. It was a more passionate kiss. A sweeter kiss. And then it was gone. His lips could still taste the edges of her on their tops. There was a wet drop upon his cheek. There was a new click of something connecting.

"You can open them now, Yahn. And I don't have to fly to the moon tonight," she whispered. "Or ever. I know you won't betray me."

"You took off your mask," whispered John. It seemed to him to be the most magical thing that could have happened. "Wasn't that dangerous?"

"I've read that a little at a time is what I need to do in order to 'link our suits'," she answered. "So I might have a little sneeze or runny nose in a little bit. But it was worth it. I'm no longer afraid."

He was silent for a moment.

"You really were worried I wouldn't be faithful were you."

"It is a very common thing Yahn. How could I not be afraid? Aunti Raan warned me. Liara warned me. The book warned me. Even I warned me earlier. Human treachery is a single word."

"If I had opened my eyes, what would you have done?" asked John after a few more minutes.

"I would have cried. I would have spent the rest of the night with you. I would have gone with you tomorrow to Ilos, helped defeat Saren, then hugged you goodbye, and gone back to the Migrant Fleet with my gift. And you would have never seen me again."

"You really were going to fly to the moon," he said, half to himself and half to her. And he knew without a doubt she would. That was how easy it was to throw away everything. They rested again for a few moments. He on his back and she resting upon his chest, just looking at him through that visor with those faintly glowing eyes.

Suddenly he grabbed her and held on as tightly as he could muster. She made several noises of the sort that people make when squeezed.

"Oh my God! I can't believe I came that close to losing you forever!" he practically sobbed.

"It's okay Yahn (Oomph!). You passed the test (Ugh!). Oh my! Oh my Yahn! I didn't mean to frighten you so.

"No," he said, breathing hard. His heart was pounding with the terror of what had just happened. "It was a good fear, Tali. You did the right thing. I was that boy in the fairy tale. I needed to be tested. I just realized how much losing you would have done to me. I would not have realized I had been caught, until you were already gone. There would have been no way to save it."

He lay back and was breathing hard. Tali, concerned that she was putting weight on his lungs, nestled to his side. John shifted his weight. He put his head upon her chest, and he was listening to her heart now.

"I can hear your life within you," he whispered. "Your heart doesn't beat like mine. It's more . . . thumpity."

"You noticed?" she said back. She liked his head upon her chest. She ran her fingers through his hair. It was short and bristled. "Your's is a steady pound. I like it. It sounds determined. It sounds as if it will never stop."

"And your's is bouncy, like you. My little monkey duck."

"Monkey Duck?" giggled Tali. "Am I a quacking bird that climbs trees and hoots?"

"Oh you remind me of all sorts of things," he said as he straightened up and once again let her nestle under his arm. "All of them cute or cuddly."

They lay together for a bit longer.

"The Migrant Fleet," mused John. "I know you have to deliver your gift. But I don't want you staying there. I kept my eyes shut. You don't get to stay on the moon you know."

"What do you sugyest?" asked Tali with a flirty coo. "How do you propose to bring your Quarian princess back to you on the Normandy?"

"Well," said John with hesitation. "How about this? I'm a specter. And a Quarian with Team Specter is going to be good for the Quarians. Proving that your people are a good thing for the Galaxy to have. After you return to the Migrant Fleet, and finish with your gifting, what happens then?"

"A ship's captain receives my gift and I become a member of that ship," answered Tali. I will be given the adult surname vas with the ship's name afterwards. Like Tali'Zorah vas Normandy."

"So what would happen if, after you tell me your new name, I contact your captain and request a transfer since the Normandy won't be able to operate at Specter quality without her Quarian Engineer?"

"There might be some political wrangling," replied Tali with a bit of a sigh. "And if my father thinks it's because I'm in love with the Ship's Captain . . . It might not happen at all. But I think . . . Ancestors, I hope I would be able to return."

"Then it's settled," concluded John. "After we defeat Saren, you take your gift back to the Fleet. We keep in touch and as soon as I can wrangle a transfer, I'll bring you back. In theory, the Reapers are not going to be stopped with this little take down of Saren. We can only hope they will be delayed. But by the time we do defeat them, you will have been with me so long that we'll think of a way to make our marriage solid enough to keep your father from breaking it up."

"Marriage?" queried Tali. She was perfectly happy that he was talking in such terms already. The problem was she didn't quite know what it fully meant.

"What do Quarians do to make sure they are together forever?" asked John. "How do you become . . . Man and Wife?"

"We make love," answered Tali with a flirty lilt to her voice. "Once we make love, we fully bond. And that bond is so strong neither partner can even hardly dream of leaving the other. Only the most horrible of crimes can threaten it, and even then, it's strength determines what sort of venyeance the wounded partner will take."

"Just like that?" asked John? "Seems a little informal. How does everyone else know you've done it. Do you hang the sheets out of the second story window like some Sicilian mother in law?"

"We formally request a clean room for the linking up of suits," answered Tali. "And what do you mean about sheets?"

"When human women make love for the first time, they bleed a little. The blood stains prove that the woman was first with her husband. In some cultures, the blood stains are put on parade to prove that the bride was a faithful woman who waited until she was properly given. A proof or test as you will of fidelity."

"Keelah," sighed Tali. "No wonder Aunti Raan is so worried. Is there no bottom to the need among humans to prove that they will be faithful?"

"So there is a public announcement of sorts," finished John.

"Yes," replied Tali. "There is little formality of course. There was ceremony in the past I was taught. But the needs of the fleet and struggles we have to yust survive have brought everything down to the simplest of rituals."

"Then how about this?" suggested John looking at Tali and smiling. "First, we get you back here. Then we get you ready to make love to me. Then we formally announce it as a means of marrying you proper in Quarian fashion. Only then do we make love. Then, when we can, I take you back to earth and we marry in human fashion so there will be no trouble on that front. A nice Catholic wedding with you being brought down the aisle by your father, a Priest officiating the vows, incense, candles, Nuptial Mass, you in white, because I'll be your first . . . Right?"

"Yeah," giggled Tali.

"Then a big party with drinking and um . . . You don't mind if I don't dance very well do you? . . . And a romantic hotel room overlooking the beach. How does that sound?"

"Sounds complicated and a waste of resources," mused Tali. "But also kind of pretty and fun and I guess it's kind of important to you?"

"Pretty much," chuckled John. "Mother would kill me if I didn't make an honest woman out of you in a Catholic fashion."

"Honest?" Asked Tali.

"Euphemism," replied John. "Nothing to worry about."

"No Yahn, what are you sugyesting?" Tali was looking up at him now.

"Okay some women don't wait until they are married and when that happens they are said to be dishonest."

"Human treachery again?"

"Yeah," sighed John. It was becoming a very enlightened night for him in a not nice way as he dealt over and over again with all the safeties humans had put into their cultures to keep betrayal at controllable levels. Simply explaining so much that he had taken for granted to a woman who came from an entirely different race with an entirely different set of issues was forcing him to take a hard cold look at himself and where he came from.

"That's why I thought we should make a proper announcement first before we do anything, um, intimate. It will be good for me anyway. You having to take so much time to prepare for that, it will be like doing courtship right for me. I need to do it this way. I did it all the wrong ways when I was younger and this is my chance to not screw it up."

Tali nodded, gave him a hug, and settled back into the crook of his arm. She no longer worried about him keeping his promises. There was no need to fly to the moon any more.

They quietly held each other.

And that is how they both fell asleep ten minutes later.

And the alarm for one hour out came way to soon.

Tali was sniffling and her eyes were watering. Not much, but there was just enough to remind her that she needed the suit. John was fidgeting as Tali just stood there adjusting her suit to apply the necessary anti-allergens and decongestant to help her recover from the reaction. John seemed to make a decision and kicked off his sweats and began rummaging through his cabin locker for his armor in his underwear. Tali looked at him for a moment.

"Your arms and legs have those long hairs too," she observed. "And those are your toes? They are short stubby things. How can you walk with those? Are they any good for climbing?"

John paused and chuckled while he worked on getting his hip armor in place. He lifted one foot, struggling to keep himself in balance by grabbing the side of his locker. Then he wiggled his toes. He heard a little hooting giggle from Tali.

"They are good for making monkey ducks laugh," he observed.

"Well they are cute," she said. Then she walked up and took out his torso piece of armor and helped him get it on. From there it was the thigh plates, the arm plates, the calves and finally boots and gloves. Then she presented him his weapons, assault rifle, sniper rifle, shotgun, and pistol.

"Your rifle needs work," she observed. "Remind me when we get back and I'll fix that extender."

"I could get used to this," he said. "Back in the Middle Ages, the ladies of the lords would help them get into their armor. Then the nobility started putting on airs and the women hated handling the dirty smelly armor bits and that job was taken over by valets. Then it became so expensive to hire valets, that today, we have to dress ourselves."

He paused and grinned.

"I'd help you get your armor on too you know," he suggested.

"I think you are offering because you think you'll have to take off my suit first," she replied with her hands on her hips and her head tilted just a bit to the left. Then she walked up to him and placed her hands on his shoulders. This time it was from the front and not the back, but even so, her fingers seemed to curl around the outline of his shoulder where the bone pressed out and gripped tightly.

"And I am really looking forward to it," she said with a shy tone.

"But my armor is already on," she sighed. "It's worked into the suit."

She proceeded to make adjustments with her omni-tool and John saw her shielding come up and the suit seemed to congeal and stiffen at crucial junctures.  
"That can't be the best armor available," he observed with a tone of concern.

"But it works for me," she answered. "I don't get the best protection from bullets and shrapnel, but I get good protection. It's all about enyineering decisions, what can and can not be done with the suit to achieve the desired results."

"I'm still going to worry," John said.

"And I you," she replied. "You are after all, on my twelve."

"And you my six," he answered.

She gently bumped her visor on his forehead.

Let's get up to the bridge," he said.

They were fifteen minutes from landfall and on the bridge, the whole team was there while Pressley was swearing in the tradition of sailors in all human navies from the past three thousand years. There were over two dozen Geth ships in orbit around the planet.

"Um Commander?" began Joker. "We've got company."

"Have their sensors picked us up yet?" asked Liara in a somewhat agitated voice.

"Stealth systems are engaged," answered Joker. "Unless we get close enough for a visual, they won't have any idea that we are here.

"Based on the readings I'm getting from Saren's location, we are screwed. The nearest landing zone is two klicks away!" snapped Pressley.

"We'll never make it in time on foot," argued Kaiden. "Take us in somewhere closer!"

Pressley was swearing again.

"There is no where closer," he shouted. "I've looked!"

"Drop us in the Mako!" decided Shepherd.

"You need a hundred meters of open terrain to make a drop like that!" retorted Pressley. "Saren's 20 is only giving us twenty."

"Twenty meters?" groaned Kaiden. "Not even with Shepherd at the wheel can we make a drop in there."

"We have to try!" argued Liara.

"Find another landing zone!" cried Tali.

"There is no other landing zone!" shouted Pressley, followed by more swearing.

"The descent angle is too steep!" continued Tali wringing her palms.

"It's our only option," argued Liara.

"It's not an option. It's a suicide run!" shouted Kaiden. "We don't . . ."

"You are all such WEENIES!" grumbled Wrex.

"I can do it," said Joker.

"Joker?" asked Shepherd.

"I can do it!" repeated Joker.

"Everyone to the Mako! Joker? Drop us right on top of that bastard!"

And that is exactly what Joker did.

John was the driving wheel, Liara was at the right on watch. Garrus was up in the gun, Wrex and Kaiden in the back ready to burst out the door while Tali sat at the engineering station. She was both scared and excited. It would be the first time since she took John as a lover that they would be doing a mission together.

A mission that could get them killed, or worse, spare one and take the other.

Yet in spite of the fear, she was able to turn around and gently grab his shoulder for a second and he turned and smiled at her. Somehow that made all the scary stuff go away.

The Mako landed with a burst of exhaust blunting the fall and came to a screeching halt in front of a bunker door completely closed. Saren had once more gotten the jump on them.

For a second they looked at the bunker door.

"It never ceases to amaze me," mused Garrus. "That 50,000 year ruins still are capable of being powered up in a fashion designed to mess with us."

"There's got to be a way to open that from out here!" concluded Shepherd. "Otherwise Saren might not have been able to get in either.

"And if it were not for the fact that a 50,000 year old garage door was just powered shut on us, I would say you were crazy," Garrus finished. "Call me a cynic, but I bet these ruins are just filled with randomly placed stones to enable us to take cover and shoot at Geth who will be showing up any minute . . ."

A flurry of bullets filled the air with the dust of impacted stones.

"Now!" finished Garrus diving behind a well place stone just perfect for shooting from behind with.

And thus began the running firefight that marked the first phase of the Battle of the Citadel. Ashley was missed, but Garrus, with Liara as his spotter, moved forward while Shepherd and Wrex formed the front of the box with Tali and Kaiden at the back of the box.

It was a standard mission, groups of Geth spotted, sniped at, lured into a firefight on the team's terms and swiftly dispatched. The only thing out of the ordinary was during a lull in the fighting when a nest of some small multi-legged bugs was disturbed and they all came scurrying out at once around the team.

"SPIDERS! SPIDERS! SPIDERS! SPIIIIIDERS!" screamed Tali frantically looking for a spot off the ground.

The bugs, frightened of being exposed to open air and warm bodies, were already dispersing.

John paused, with balled fists upon his hips and legs placed firmly apart. He was working very hard at not sniggering. He looked at Wrex who was standing there acting like the fact that Tali was up on his shoulders, peaking over his hump frantically looking to see if the creepy crawlies had all left, was no big deal.

"Wrex? What are you doing giving piggy back rides to my girl?"

"Sorry Shepherd, you know how it is. We Krogan just ooze protective energies around cute Quarian girls. I can't help being irresistible when there are scary bugs about. After all, you do remember that she hugged me first?"

Tali hopped down and in classic cute shy embarrassed hops got back behind Shepherd. She remained bouncy and jumpy as they moved on. A few moments later, they found a working power terminal that opened the door and warned them about the Reapers.

Dashing back to the Mako, they climbed in, and Shepherd gunned it into the tunnel.

"It's times like this," grumbled Kaiden as the Mako began to swing from point to point under Shepherd's frantic driving style. "That I feel like my entire life is being guided by some cosmic fourteen year old yanking a joystick."

"I would have thought Saren would have set a trap for us," mused Liara as they sped down the corridor. She continued to watch for any clues as the Mako bounced off the floors and walls as Shepherd drove it with the accelerator driven a full twenty-two millimeters into the floorboards.

"Either that or we haven't run into it yet," suggested Wrex.

"You do realize with all this shaking I'm going to have to recalibrate this gun," shouted Garrus from up top.

During the Reaper War, Diana Allers, one of the few news journalists who had been sympathetic to the aliens on board the Normandy, was able to secure an interview with Tali. And one of the questions she asked Tali was what had been the most nerve wracking experience of the Battle of the Citadel.

"It was after we talked with the Prothean VI in the tunnel," recalled Tali, leaning back upon the couch inserting a tube of a dextro steaming beverage into her suit. It wasn't coffee, it was another brewed decoction which did the same thing for Quarians. As if they needed something to make them even more bouncy. Tali was not going to immediately answer, she was going to provide the backstory first.

"The VI had told us that the Conduit had been a direct pathway to the Citadel. It had been one of the Prothean efforts to in some fashion sabotagh the Reaper harvest. It was, as a consequence, a one way conduit. The Prothian mission team was able to yenetically modify the keepers so that the keepers would not respond to the Reaper signal to open the conduit from dark space. Because of this the Reapers could not arrive and secure the Citadel for the start of the next harvest. Thus even though the Protheans knew they were doomed, they knew that the Reapers would still feel their sting for a long time. In order for Saren to bring in the Reapers, he was going to have to use the Conduit to enter the Citadel so he might be able to bring the Citadel software online and synchronized with Sovereign's software."

"But wouldn't it have been simpler for him to just sail into the Citadel as a Specter and prepare for Sovereign's arrival?" queried Diana.

"It would have required Saren first to not be under suspicion, and Saren was smart enough that he did not wish to gamble that his subterfuge would remain secure," answered Tali. "He wouldn't have used the conduit if he hadn't needed it. But he did not wish to move forward until he knew where it was since Sovereign likewise had to coordinate with the Geth fleet. And once he knew that Yahn was on his tail, it was absolutely necessary to his success."

"So," continued Diana. "Back to my first question, this harrowing experience."

"We were under pressure and we knew we had to move fast. So Yahn told Wrex to drive the Mako and do the Scary Krogan." Tali paused for a second. "I don't remember the rest of the trip."

The third Mako of Team Specter was now a sparking and smoking upside down ruin, but they were on the Citadel. Outside, Sovereign was busy linking up with the tower while the Geth fleet kept the Citadel and Human fleets tied down. They were down to the wire.

With Wrex and Shepherd in front, the team charged through the Citadel finally reaching the Presidium where the final confrontation with Saren was had.

And Tali saw John at his finest. He didn't just savagely attack Saren. In spite of all the pain and suffering Saren had caused, in spite of the piles of dead from Eden Prime to the halls beneath them, in spite of the death of Ashley, John once more choose to challenge Saren's thinking. And broke through.

John had help though. Saren's final indecision provoked a painful retaliation from Sovereign and the pain of Sovereign's ultimate contempt for him clarified his mind like nothing else and his will was once again his own. John could see from the expression of Saren's face that Saren knew he had been played.

"Thank you Shepherd," he said softly, and blew his brains out with his own pistol. A final act to secure himself from Sovereign's clutches forever.

"Rest in Peace, Brother Specter," whispered John.

It would have made sense at that point for Sovereign to flee, the jig was up and all efforts to secure software control of the Citadel were being thwarted by the team. His shielding and armor could take a lot of punishment from the allied fleets who were now entirely focused upon him. All he had to do was sail away and mock their efforts at trying to stop him. But to think that a collection of insignificant races could thwart him, a god, was something he refused to contemplate. He continued to try to regain control and ignored his steadily decreasing shield strength until he found his body was no longer cooperating with his efforts, and he began, in spite of his will, to detach and drift away from the tower. And only then was he afraid. But three seconds later, a bolt from the Normandy punctured his torso and he was dead.

The team dashed for cover as the entire tower shuddered with the impact of Sovereign's debris. Then there was silence save for the wail of emergency sirens in the distance. Then parts of the Presidium slid off of a ball of glowing blue energy surrounding the spot where Kaidan and Liara were standing. Then Garrus hopped down from a tree. Then Wrex lifted up a beam he had been under while Tali scurried out from under him. And then he tossed it aside and walked up to the rest of the team grinning. But Tali was frantically searching for John. A gnawing terror was gripping her, and as Captain Anderson came up calling for him, she nearly broke into tears. Then she saw a figure leap up on top of what had been a reaper leg, and hop down and walk across the way towards them. He had a 'yep it's me, saver of the galaxy' smile upon his face. The silly Bosh'tet had no right to be so smug about it. But she didn't care. She ran and seized him, locking on to his shoulder blades as if her life would have ended without him.

Her anchor was secure. She was no longer afraid.


	8. Chapter 8 - Flown To The Moon

_Since the Great Reaper War, there have been numerous historical theories as to why it was fought the way it was fought and it seems that every fifty years or so there is yet another new idea revolving around the what if's which plague all historical speculation. The recent theories circulating about the importance of the Crucible and Catalyst that have filled the universities on Earth, Palavan, and Thessia are just one of these interesting examples I have seen in my five centuries of life. However I remain firmly of the opinion, and every academic who has faced me across the debate podium will attest, that the decisive victory of the Reaper War was the first one, at the Citadel. John Shepherd's initial analysis of Reaper strategy and it's fundamental flaws proved entirely accurate and almost prescient._

_"Imagine if you will," he said to me one evening over beer, "that after the defeat and death of Sovereign, Harbinger had simply decided to postpone the harvest for another 200 years before trying that attack tactic again. It's not entirely out of the question. After all, what's 200 years in a 50,000 year cycle? What would have happened?"_

_I knew the answer immediately._

_"The Council's opinion that the Reapers were a myth would have been vindicated. You would have faded into obscurity, ever warning about a threat which refused to materialize. Eventually you would have suffered the reputation of a fear-monger or paranoid and have been gracefully retired to an insignificant desk job, and the galaxy would have slept. You would have died an obscure death and have been forgotten. And then a new Saren would have been recruited, and the Reapers would have arrived at the Citadel, and the whole cycle would have begun just like any other cycle, but more importantly, the Reapers, knowing that the Keepers had been retooled by the Protheans, would have corrected that, and the next cycle after ours would have begun like every cycle prior to ours; with complete and total strategic surprise."_

_John looked at me and nodded. Then we ordered another round. I was learning to love beer._

_Of course no one, least of all the Reapers, knew how decisive the Battle of the Citadel was at the time. Nor did we realize that while the Reapers had not bothered to learn enough about the races which they were setting out to harvest, they knew on some level at least that John was a genuine threat. There was a price to that victory, a price which shortly thereafter cost us the first Normandy and the life of Commander John Michael Shepherd._

_Excerpts from "The Man Tali Loved, A Biography of Admiral John Michael Shepherd" by Doctor Liara T'Soni._

As his suit completely depressurized, John was already working on sealing up the holes thanks to his Navy training. He knew that there was a small redundant flask of air which would refill to the suit once he had sealed up the last of the holes. There was no point in releasing that air prior, it would promptly leave as well and then there would be nothing. All he had to do was hold out. Even so, as each hole was sealed and his hud was informing him that his suit was at 95% integrity, he was on the verge of passing out in the vacuum.

Behind him the Normandy was totally broken up and it's debris were tumbling into the atmosphere towards a surface crash site. He didn't know how many had gotten out. He knew Liara had escaped and Joker had escaped. Indeed he would not have been in this predicament if Joker had vacated prior. But Joker had stayed behind trying to save the ship and John was determined that every last member of the crew he could reach would evacuate before he would leave the ship.

Tali was safe. He knew that. She had left for the Migrant Fleet three weeks prior constantly worrying the whole time. Fears seemed to pluck at her at an hourly basis. There was the hour in which she was convinced her gift wouldn't be good enough. There was the whole day she was convinced that the Geth would destroy the Quarian vessel she was taking from the Citadel to the Migrant Fleet and she would not be there to help John face the struggles of warning an increasingly ungrateful council in denial of the real threat. And then of course there was the 'spider' incident. She spend three days was utterly certain that everyone was laughing at her for her hysterical reaction to those little bugs on Ilos. And then she was afraid they would not be able to get back together. That the Migrant Fleet would not let her return. He had done what he could, but mostly the treatment prescribed was a shared bunk with her sleeping in his arms.

There had been a week of shore leave after the Battle. And he had taken her to Bullrush. He had tried to get into Ryuusei's Sushi, but the restaurant was booked up for the entire time, or so the receptionist claimed. He got suspicious the third time when the woman insisted that there were no tables for that night and besides, his _girlfriend_ wouldn't be able to eat anything on the menu anyway.

He had not mentioned Tali at all when he had asked for reservations for two. And as he wanted Ryuusei's to be a surprise, he had not mentioned the restaurant to her either. And he was grateful he had kept his mouth closed on the matter. He didn't want to disappoint her. But the gossip columnists on the Citadel were talking routinely about how the Hero Specter of the Battle of the Citadel had been behaving like a school boy around a certain bouncy Quarian suit-rat even going so far as holding her hand. Shepherd knew the signs. He was persona non grata at the posh establishments. He was rocking the boat. He was warning about the end of the world. Prophets are always hated by the upper class and no one was more upper class in the galaxy than the Council and their sycophants. Udina was not at all gently warning him that he was becoming an embarrassment to humanity.

But he kept trying to calm her worries and keep her 'bouncy'. The night before shore leave had begun, he had gone down to engineering and made a little ring for her out of three copper wires. He had worked hard on braiding the three thin wires into a round strand and had even melted a bead of copper on the top to it looked a bit like an engagement ring which she could wear over her suit. It would not draw much attention and she appreciated the fact that it wasn't a major waste of resources. And he had made it for her so she was more than happy to overlook it's numerous engineering deficiencies. She made sure she repaired all of them when he wasn't around and wore it openly, even going so far as to flash it to the crew members who found the whole thing classic butterfly rainbow bouncy Tali. He called it a pre-engagement ring. She didn't know what an engagement ring was. So after he explained it all out to her, he resolved to surprise her with a real one. When she was with Liara on a Girly-girl afternoon at the Citadel, he had slipped away and picked the perfect engagement ring for her, one she could wear under her suit safely. The diamond strand (for there were five very small ones) was set into the flattened band of silver and so once the glove was put on, there would be no trace of it outside. He planned to give it to her when she returned to the Normandy after she had finished her Pilgrimage.

And now as he was trying to seal up that last hole, it was in his suit's front pouch. He had made sure he had gotten it before he had begun the evacuation of the Normandy during the attack.

But the last night before she had left had been the most special in his mind. He had secured a hotel suite for the two of them. There was a big double bed, a living room, and kitchenette which a balcony overlooking one of the water parks. Tali had first worried about how much it had cost, and when John refused to tell her, she was worried he had spent all his money. Finally he said, "Tali? You're going back to the Migrant Fleet tomorrow, don't you want this last night to be special?"

She had no answer for that and stopped talking about how worried she was. Whether or not she stopped worrying was an enigma. Then he pulled out a bottle of Muskwin and poured her a tube of it. He then put a splash of it in his glass and then thinned it out with water. It would be safe enough for him, but it was horribly sweet and by cutting it with water he made it taste more like an ordinary dessert wine. He too had been researching dextro and levo. And they went out to the balcony and nestled on a lounge chair and watched the people walking down the pathways of the water park.

Later, as the night cycle came on, she snuggled up next to him, took off a glove, and gently caressed his lips with one of her fingers for a moment. He could not take his eyes off of her hand. It was both alien and yet awesomely cute. There was a gap between the two fingers on the thin palm and he imagined easily slipping his more fingered hand into it like two pieces of a puzzle. Her fingers were long, graceful, and strong. There was a fingernail, but it looked thicker than a human's. And it was more tightly curled than a human fingernail. It was cut short of course. At the end of about two moments, she gently put the finger on her mouth port and then put her glove back on. That was to be the extent of her skin exposure to him that night. Then he got goofy and exhaled on her visor, and then drew a heart upon the condensation.

"No fair, Yahn," she cried. "I don't want to wipe it off but I can't see!"

"Then I shall have to carry you everywhere!" he proclaimed. And did so, not exactly everywhere, but to the bedroom where they lay in each other's arms until they fell asleep.

The next morning, he took her down for breakfast and then they walked to the ship's port where the Quarian vessel, the Kwargo, was preparing to leave for the Migrant Fleet. During the last two hours they were together, Tali refused to let go of him, holding on to his arm or hands or shoulders at all time. But the time to board the ship came, and she cried, and then ran into the ship and positioned herself by one of the ship's windows so she could see him for as long as possible while she sailed off. He stood watching the ship vanish into the dust of space. The rest of the day was melancholy for him. He had boarded the Normandy with orders to seek out the last pockets of Geth and remove them. It was clearly a 'sit down and shut up' set of orders. The moment he had gotten some free time he had sent her an extra-net letter and she had replied in a matter of minutes.

And so the letter exchanges had begun over the next three weeks. In four days she was back at the Migrant Fleet, the Captain of the Neema had taken her gift. She was now Tali'Zorah vas Neema. She mentioned her father had been 'pleased' with her gift. But he remained distant. Aunti Raan was worried about him, that is, John. Tali was assuring that Aunti was starting to come around, sort of, at least she didn't call his pre-engagement ring 'stupid' though Tali was at a loss as to how to explain to Aunti Raan what it signified. Aunti was asking a lot of questions. The one that was bothering Tali the most was the understanding that Tali would not be able to have any children by John.

John spent some time thinking about that one. Then he asked Tali if there were any Quarian customs revolving around adoption. The next letter had been animated and excited. There was such a process, and as he expected, it was very brief and to the point with little ritual, chiefly handled by the Ship's Captains involved. The one where the child came from and the one who had the couple seeking to adopt. It made sense. Population on a ship had to be closely watched lest there was stress upon the air, water, and food supply. But John guessed that the question had in some fashion touched Aunti Raan's heart, who ever that was. Tali was not entirely specific on that count. The next few letters were more animated especially when his request for transfer was received. The last letter was Tali's excitement over the fact that the Admiralty board had reviewed his request and the feeling was that her presence on the Normandy would be a good symbol for the Quarian people, for her involvement in the Battle of the Citadel had made her a minor celebrity in the Migrant Fleet. She was sure the request would be approved. And all through she talked about all the happy memories on the Normandy, how much she missed him, and how desperately she wanted to experience the final 'bonding'.

He had sent one last letter just an hour before the attack. It had talked about how much he had missed her. How much he was looking forward to her returning, and how his love for her had grown with the absence. He had hoped that this would be the last time they would be separated, three weeks without her had made a very big hole in his heart.

And now he was just about to get that last hole in his suit sealed, his lungs were screaming for air, his body was beginning to tremble from the rapid drop of temperature in his suit without the insulation of air in it. The hud still mocked him with 95% integrity. There was just one last thing he needed to do.

He experienced a sudden rush of euphoria, the pain was vanishing, his vision narrowed to a point of light, and then suddenly he could see again. His lungs were not screaming, he was free to think and act.

Problem was his body was floating away from him.

It dawned upon him that he was dead. There was his body, limp, already 100 meters away from his position, drifting into a low orbit around the planet. He was aware of that body. He could sense it still, even as it fell away. But it was no longer where he was.

Then he heard his name called and he responded.

And found himself on a gravel pathway or a stone road. It seemed to be both at the same time, both great and wide and small and intimate. The road to the capital, the path to the farm house. It was as if it were made of pearls, but more glowing. It was as white as silver, but more silvery. It glowed as much as gold, but more golden. He looked up and it led to a massive white wall, and in the middle of it was a vast golden gate that seemed to glow so brightly it was almost as if it were on fire. He walked up the pathway and the gate did not get bigger, it got smaller. The wall did not get more vast, but more normal. But it still looked more intense than anything he had seen before. He came up to it and the wall was just as high as his head and the gate was just as normal door, but more a door than any door he had ever seen. Then he looked to his right, and that was a new sensation because he didn't turn his head to see to the right, he had no head to turn. He simply thought of looking to the right and there he was, looking to the right.

Sitting at a desk, looking more wooden and polished a desk than any desk he had seen was a man, burly fellow, with brown curly hair and beard who looked more brown and burley and more of a man than any man he had ever envisioned. The desk looked like it had been lovingly worked upon for . . . Well he could have sworn it was made and polished yesterday but likewise it was a million years old, or at least a few thousand. It was work desk work deskofisized.

On it was a book, and by it was a ink pot with the ultimate in quill pen. Of course the ink pot looked pretty awesometastic itself.

And it was opened to a page, and that page said at the top, John Michael Shepherd.

But the man was what John was more interested in. The man was dressed in a genuine Roman toga with a Roman red sash. On that sash were hieroglyphs, icons, pictures. There was the outline of a fish, a young man carrying a sheep over his shoulders, a sea shell pouring water, a Chi-Rho. In fact, that sash seemed to tell the entire history of the man and what he represented, both in his earthly life, and here. John found it so amazing that so much information was packed on that red sash and yet it refused to look at all crowded. He wore a hat pointed like the ancient middle eastern king's crowns. And he had a shepherd's crook. Around his neck was a golden chain which hung down on his chest and hanging from it were two golden keys.

"Peter!" said John. He didn't know why he recognized the man, but he was certain he had.

"John Michael Shepherd; congratulations, you made it by the skin of your teeth," said Peter.

"What? Was it really that close?"

"Extremely," replied Peter.

He pointed to the book on the desk.

"Take a look," he suggested.

There on those two pages was John's life in full detail from his first conscious memories of his second year old birthday party to everything he had been thinking about the second before he had died.

And it was not a comfortable read. There was nothing held back. It was all there, every lie, bit of cheating, hatreds, mockeries, secret relishes when bullets had splattered into specific enemy faces, and John had no excuses for any of it. But he read it all, every last nasty vindictive dirty little thing he had done or envisioned. There were the good things too. Many of them. But they now seemed so insignificant in the overall story of his life. Even the part where he had defeated Sovereign was marred by his smug 'I'm so hot and grand' attitude he had possessed when he had found he had escaped any serious damage from the collapse of the Presidium under the debris of Sovereign. Not a single thought about how the rest of the team was doing or even if they were in danger. He wasn't even thinking of how close to death Tali might have been.

"I can't believe I came that close to losing it," he stammered. "And . . . And I loved her so much! And there I was, all wrapped up in myself."

"You still do love her very much," observed Peter. "You won't stop loving her you know, now that you are here." Peter paused.

"But you were able to read the whole thing weren't you, even the mud and the blood. That's what sends folks to the pits you know. They can't take their lives being laid out before them in full panoramic detail. All their lives they lied to themselves about who they were and what they were. And they come here and it's put before them. All of it. Nothing held back. The truth, the whole truth, nothing but the truth. They hate it. They turn and run, at the speed of thought, and there's only one place you can run to when you run from here."

"Don't they have any regrets?" asked John. He was stunned. He hated what he had done in his life that was anything less than good. He was sorry he had done it because now he saw how ugly and vile it really was.

"The only regret they have is that they were caught," sighed Peter. "On occasion some of them get second chances, what with the knowledge men have about medicine. But even then, so many of them go back to the lives they lived before. Even those who were in the pits when the doctors pulled them back into their bodies. They lie to themselves about their experience in the pits and they are even worse than they were before. If just one of them," Peter continued. "Just one of them were sorry that they had done something wrong because it was wrong, the pits would spit them out and they would fly right over that wall." He pointed to the wall that was behind him. "They hate it in the Pits, but they hate it here even more. None of them will ever come back here, even if you try to drag them kicking and screaming."

"That's just so . . . Stupid!" muttered John

"Like Sovereign?" suggested Peter. "That's really what all evil is in the end. Stupidity in the lives of countless beings. And it's almost impossible to fix stupid."

"I thought you couldn't fix stupid?" asked John.

"You can't," replied Peter. "But we can. The whole point of religion _is_ to fix stupid."

"Doesn't always seem to work that well," suggested John. It was more a question than a challenge and Peter seemed to know that.

"Precisely because no one on earth really understands just how much stupid there is to fix," replied Peter. "Look at your life. Do you have any idea how much stupid we fixed in you before you came here? And even then it was barely enough!"

John looked at the book again. And he began to understand. All those stupid things he had done, so many of them he had actually learned something from when he had been facing the consequences. But not just his behaviors, those of his family and friends as well. His father's persistent alcoholism had directly influenced him to stay away from alcohol until he could slowly learn to drink it with discipline and control. That sudden nausea when that beautiful exotic dancer with the red hair had thrown up in his lap and he found himself asking if a body that beautiful was worth the self-indulgence she was engaged in. That incredible blond girl with the skin tight body suits and braless outfits who was so Mind Numbingly Boring in his high school. And then there was Tali volunteering to drill with Liara and his desire to love a woman like her because she was worth loving . . .

. . . Because she was good.

It was all about loving The Good.

"So what was it that saved me?" asked John. "I was a rotten Catholic."

"I don't dispute that," replied Peter. "That's why you just squeaked in."

"Was it loving Tali? Was it loving someone that good?"

"It helped a great deal, but that wasn't what saved you," answered Peter. "What cleaned you up was that you went to save Joker, who wasn't as good. You sacrificed your own safety to save everyone on your ship, even that leacher who's horribly addicted to pornography. You saved him from the pits you did. He's got a second chance which he has no clue he's got . . . yet. And you died trying to save everyone. That's what pulled you through in the end. The pain of death, coupled with the reason for your death."

Peter paused.

"Never underestimate the value of pain and suffering in getting someone to stop being stupid," he said. "Or as one of our great writers up here said, 'the prospect of being immediately hanged, clarifies the mind wonderfully.'"

"Dr. Samuel Johnson?" asked John.

"Ah, you know him already," replied Peter. "Yes, yes indeed. You know he wrote the first English Dictionary? Now that was a task. It even had some good jokes in it. When was the last time you read a dictionary for the jokes?"

"I don't even think I ever read a dictionary," groaned John. "Not even to look up dirty words in it. So . . . What now? And . . . If I might ask. Why hasn't anyone else come up here? There's a really big galaxy . . . Around here somewhere. And with trillions of lives in it. I have a hard time believing no one else is dying."

"Ah John," answered Peter smiling. "Welcome to the great thing about eternity. Time is elastic. We all get to spend as much time with each other as we like. If time here where like it is in the galaxy? You would be at the back of a million mile long line and it would be a Very Long Wait to get up here. No the next person who comes along won't come until after I've sent you along and that is after I give you the tour. But from the perspective of the galaxy, 64,258 people of all species have died since you arrived. And an additional 345 were added while I told you that number."

"And you handle them all?" asked John.

"Well you need to understand that while all truth is God's truth, not everyone who makes it up here has the full truth in their heads. We even get the occasional atheist who really did believe there was no God. Rare birds in atheist circles but there are those who really try to be virtuous even though they have no actual intellectual reason to be so. We are very gentle with them. An Asari thinks there's going to be a Goddess. And as God has no sex, he can appear appropriately. You'll find every Asari here still worshipping the Goddess. There's no reason for God to insist that he is Male to a mono-gendered race that is primarily female in gender. That is how He made them after all. They see Him as the most divine Goddess ever. And a poor pious young moslem who's worked so hard sacrificing his life to fight what he's been taught is evil believing he's going to get 70 virgins . . . Well we can't just drop 70 nuns on him can we?"

"I doubt the nuns would appreciate it," mused John.

"Precisely," continued Peter. "Unless you give them shotguns first."

"Um have . . ."

"Yes we have," he replied. "Some of them are very good shots too."

They had walked into the gate and were going down the streets of a city which bore the resemblance of every city John had ever seen, and furthermore, could have seen in any day and age. There were people everywhere, with shops and trades, and just about everything he could expect in a city. Only it was . . . perfect.

"But the real test for you comes now," said Peter.

"Test?"

"Yes, not one to determine if you are worthy to be here or not. You've achieved that. No this is . . . Far more . . . Um . . . intense."

"What can be worse than having to look at all the rotten things you did in your galactic life right in the eye with no buffer?" asked John.

"You're about to find out," answered Peter.

"Why don't you tell me now?"

"Because He likes surprises," replied Peter with a mischievous grin.

John knew in theory that he had just been given a very serious warning. But the quality of the world he was in seemed to assure him that nothing catastrophically bad would happen if he passed or failed, or if even there was a pass or fail.

They walked through a great set of doors and found themselves in a Royal Hall. And on the throne was God himself. Or more precisely, Yeshua Christos, known as Jesus Christ among the English speaking.

The throne and it's occupant seemed to reach to the sky. There was thunder and lightning on all sides, ten thousand trillion beings on either side looking like every thing John could have ever imagined were chanting "Kadosh Kadosh Kadosh". The eyes of the Christos blazed with ten thousand times ten thousand blue suns. The cloth he was wearing shown like molten gold with silver. The throne seemed to be built of the very fire of love itself. Had he been still mortal, he would have felt as if his body would have just burned away from the sheer power and magnitude of the divine he saw before him.

But as he got closer, the throne and Jesus got smaller, until they were his own size. And looking perfectly ordinary. He was looking at a rather ordinary carpenter from an ordinary provence of Rome. But that didn't change who he was.

He realized he needed to bow, really bow, like put his face on the floor. Which he did.

"Rise," said Christ. "Welcome home."

"Nice place you have here, Lord?" suggested John. He really had no idea what he was supposed to say.

"Yes it is," Christ replied with a smile. "Made it myself you know."

"Peter said there was . . ."

"A test? Yes. A very big one," answered Jesus. "Doesn't happen very often, but you're getting an extra big one."

"Let me ask you something John," began Christ. He got up from the throne, walked over to John, and putting his hand on John's shoulder, gently guided him to a garden on the side. It was a lush and beautiful garden. There were several arabic boys busy attending to all the plants and singing birds. They seemed quite content, in fact they had that middle eastern boy smile which suggested complete serenity at the joy of being just accepted and loved and cared for. Like they were where they had always dreamed of being. The colors just leapt out, the reds were as red as red could be, the blues equally blue, and the green was so alive that John almost swore the very color of the leaves itself was just as alive as the leaf. And he even couldn't begin to grasp the intense birdness of the birds. The garden of course both seemed to be a patio overlooking the grand castle cathedral he had walked into, and also seemed to go on forever.

"Are you happy here?" asked Christ.

"Lord? Is this a trick question?" laughed John.

"Captain Obvious of course," answered Christ. "But you get the gist. You are happy here. You know you are happy here."

"And this lasts forever," continued John.

"Eternity is that long," replied Christ.

Then Christ got serious. He looked directly into John's eyes.

John could see so many details of that face, including the fact that the long brown beard had been deliberately plucked out at the end of the chin. He remembered that the last moments of Christ's life on earth had been hanging on the most brutal torture device ever invented by mankind.

"Are you willing to sacrifice this for a time?" asked Christ. "Are you willing to give all this up to save even more from the pits?"

"You're not asking me to go to the pits are you?"

"The pits would spit you out before you even got your hair singed."

"What are you asking me to do Lord?"

Jesus began to look into the sky above the garden.

"You died at the time of the fourth harvest by the Reapers," he began. "They were created by a large aquatic race who had fallen into darkness with their own hubris. The Reapers turned on them and sought to destroy them. They have been hiding ever since. And what few righteous among them left have begged for an end of the harvest for two hundred millennia."

"Why did you wait so long?"

"Because it took them this long to pray sufficiently for an end," replied Christ. There was disgust in his voice.

"But you didn't have . . ."

"Every law I make I bind myself to," replied Christ. "I made a pact with all sentient life at the dawn of time. That I would only go where they requested, I would only grant what they knew they needed. I would teach them gently and without compulsion. That I would give them the freedom to learn from their own mistakes."

"So . . ."

"There is no reason why the galaxy should have wars and crime and injustice," continued Christ. "I have all the supernatural means at my disposal to grant each person the ability to life a good life, discover me, fall in love with me, and come here to spend eternity in joy and happiness doing what they love doing and being with whom they love being with."

"But I will not make them so they have to be happy. I will not force them to be good. I will not blast the skies with terror so that all bow to me for fear of pain and suffering."

"I want to love, and be loved," he finished. "That was the whole point of creation. You don't get that blasting the universe with fire and brimstone."

"But there has been fire and brimstone," John pointed out.

Christ looked at him, and John realized that Christ was perfectly happy to have that criticism directed at him. It was apparently part of learning who Christ was.

"Fire and Brimstone are employed when evil has made it impossible to be good. When those who want to follow me have lost all means to follow me, then I smite. But not one second before. When no one is capable of loving me, themselves, or each other, that is when I wipe the slate clean. But even then it does not force those who wish to follow me to follow me. Even then some of them eventually reject me and go their own way . . . Which ends in the pits."

Christ seemed to smile ironically.

"For the atheist, one drop of fire and brimstone is an ocean full too much. For the man who demands justice, a sea of fire and brimstone is hardly a drop."

Christ paused again.

"It is the price of leaving oneself open to judgement by the finite who only know their own time and place and circumstance."

John stood there for a moment and realized how much an ape Sovereign's speech had been to him on Virmire. Christ did not need to claim to be divine, he simply was and John could see it. Christ did not sit there observing that His ways were beyond the thoughts of mortal ken. He simply acted according to them and you figured it out afterward. Christ did not dismiss John's questions as the foolish queries of the small and insignificant. He answered them. John was small, but Christ made himself small for him. John was ignorant, but Christ chose to enlighten him.

As the ancient Greeks had observed in the days of Percales; a good God did not demand the right to be worshiped, He _earned_ the right to be worshiped.

"So you want to end the harvest of the Reapers," concluded John. "And something I have to sacrifice will stop it."

"Eventually," answered Christ. "In fact, this is what I made you for."

"Okay," John said. "I'll bite. What am I supposed to do?"

He crossed his arms and waited.

Christ turned to him and smiled, almost as if he already knew what John's answer was going to be. And of course John suspected he did.

"Your body has been found," began Christ. "Liara found it. She delivered your ring to Tali. You'll need to know that if you do what I ask. Liara did not just find your body. She dressed it in your armor which she repaired, hid the horrors space had done to it with a helmet. A skilled mortician made a wax face which covered what was left of your face so that they might see you and know it was you. She placed it into a nice coffin. A Priest was sent and a Mass was held. Your mother was most appreciative. Tali was there as well of course. She wept on your mother's shoulder. Her grief was great. She still mourns you, though she does not realize it any more. She has buried herself in work to keep from thinking about you."

"After the funeral, Liara gave the body to a woman named Miranda Lawson. She was created by most foul means, without love. And it has wounded her deeply though she knows not how deep. She will attempt to rebuild your body DNA strand by DNA strand, cell by cell. It will take her a great deal of time to reconstitute your corpse from what was left of it."

"Why did Liara give my body to this Miranda," asked John.

"Liara is Asari. Asari know the patterns of the dance of time better than any other race. They live long and can see far. She knows that the Reapers are coming. She knows that the Galaxy is not ready and the politicians can only see tomorrow. She is afraid. Her fear led her to grant to Miranda the freedom to bring you back even though she thinks it can not happen. She is that desperate, hoping for a miracle though she does not know that is what she asks for. The Asari seldom need supernatural intervention. But Miranda does not understand that there is a soul to your body. She thinks that if she merely rebuilds you, you will show up."

"You mean you want me to go back to the galaxy?"

"That is the request."

"Lord God are you crazy? Are you asking me to go back to a mortal life and risk screwing up and ending up in the pits?"

Jesus smiled.

"You know John, that is a very astute question. And to answer you, no. I'm not asking you to go back and risk screwing up and ending up in the pits. If I were to do that, the atheist would really have a case that I'm a rotten bastard. There are prayers of the faithful that I can apply to you, in the economy of worship, that will keep you from doing anything that would result in your being in the pits. You won't be a robot of course, but you'll be able to see clearly enough to know what actions would be evil and you will simply behave like any good human who knows better. You will still make mistakes. If you were perfect on earth like you are now perfect in heaven, you would be so intolerable that members of your own team would end up killing you. That's why they killed me you know. I never was wrong about anything. But I was supposed to be killed. The trick for me was getting the timing right. Killing you on the other hand would make the project a rather futile exercise."

"So I'm to go back and defeat the Reapers," asked John.

"No you are to go back and fight the Reapers," replied Christ. "I will not promise you the victory, only that eventually there will be victory because you fought."

"Does that mean I'm going to lose? I'm going to fight a heroic battle and see everything I care for destroyed in the end? But somehow somewhere someone will be inspired to fight and win?"

"I'm not saying that either," said Christ.

"Win or lose, God?"

"I'm not telling, John."

"Why not! You know already don't you?"

"You won't be perfect, remember? You will make mistakes. If you fight thinking you are certain to win, you will lose. If you fight thinking you will lose, you will fail to win if such were possible. You can not know the outcome. You can not know if you will die in battle, or live to be an old man with the woman you will love. You can not be infinite. You were not made to be infinite. You couldn't even be made infinite if I desired. There can only be one of me. You are finite, you can not see all the outcomes like I can. I can not let you know the outcome. You have to fight for victory, not knowing if you will or will not win."

It made sense once it was explained. Jesus stood there, with a gentle smile on his face, waiting for John to decide.

"It's really tough to give all this up, to leave this peace and security, to go back to the threat of poverty, to have to face injustice, to have to feel pain again. To see ugliness again," sighed John.

"Would it help if I informed you that it will be even better for you when you get back here?" asked Christ. "That you will love this place even more than you do now, that you will be even happier here than you are now?"

"It's a nice gesture on your part," answered John. "And I don't doubt you can make it happen. But it doesn't make it any easier."

"No it doesn't," answered Jesus. "Which is why I'm asking for permission. I can't expect you to do this. I'm asking you for more courage than you are obligated to offer. I'm asking you for more willingness to endure pain than you were required to endure. There will be consolations of course. Both in the galaxy and here when you get back. For starters you will give one girl one of the greatest surprises that any girl has ever gotten. You will make her very happy all the days of her life however long . . . or short, they be. After all, it's not every day the prince flies back down from . . . the moon."

"You heard that didn't you," chuckled John. He realized that had he been mortal, he would have been blushing furiously.

"I hear everything. I see everything. I know everything," replied Christ in a deadly serious tone. "Where do you think Peter get's his book reports from?"

John stood there. He was certain he would have been sweating if he had been mortal. He was certain he would have been shaking. He was certain that he would have been blubbering like a baby. He did not want to leave. He did not have to leave. But there was going to be so much suffering soon. There would be so much death. So much evil. So many people would die and fall into the pits in despair. Not all the war he had experienced would compare to what the Reapers would bring. This wouldn't be a war which killed only soldiers and those luckless civilians who's only fault was that they would be on the battle fields. No, the Reapers would not stop until every single person was dead, and the Reapers would do this only because every single person was alive. Genocide that would not be limited to a single religious group, or national group, or intellectual capacity, or physical make up, or age bracket. It would be a Genocide against life itself. All the human tyrants that had strode through the sorry ages of human history? Combined even? Infantile Amateurs!

And he knew he could say no. He knew that Jesus would look at him, smile and say, "Oh well, can't blame a God for trying."

And he would go to his place in heaven and remain happy for eternity. He was in the middle of perfection. He was in the middle of Utopia. A real Utopia, a Utopia that Thomas Moore could not have possibly envisioned (He'd have to read that book now, he was fully certain that heaven had a great library or two).

But he also knew, that there would be little piece of him which would wonder for eternity what might have been, what good could have been achieved.

He looked into Christ's eyes. He could just now catch a glimpse of the infinite trillions of 'what if's' that were between those two eyes.

He was really glad he was John, and not God.

And he also knew, that he had been picked, because God knew he would be fully aware that he always would have been wondering if he said no.

And yet it was his decision. Freely given.

"I'll do it," he said.

No sigh of relief, no exhale, no relaxing of the shoulders, not even a "Thank Me!" exclamation. Just a single instruction.

"Go back out the gate John, and back down the road, and you'll find yourself in your rebuilt body. Over a year will have passed in galactic time."

"Have I been taking this long to make the decision?" he asked.

"No," replied Christ, who was walking with him as he went to the door of the great cathedral. "This is eternity John, time here is . . . What we want it to be. But it will take Miranda some time rebuilding you before your soul will be able to handle being in that rebuilt body."

He stepped out the door and he walked down the streets of the great golden city. He looked at the windows, he looked at the sign posts, he examined the cobble stones as he walked down the road. People drove by him in cars, they rode by him in chariots, they rode by him on horses, there was even one African lad who was galloping along on a zebra. Two young guys were zipping along on glowing skateboards. Every man looked like a god, every woman looked like a goddess. He wanted to remember as much of this as possible. There was a clothing store, and inside were three Asari busy trying on one dress after another discussing how they should be tailored, each one wanting the others to know if this was good enough on her Each one more concerned about what her friends wanted on her than what she thought she looked best in. And there was an Italian tailor, his excited Italian and flamboyant gestures offering this or that. And all the clothing patterns were simply almost alive. But what was so fascinating was that he swore he was in some museum looking at a classic painting. The tailor was in Italian Renaissance clothing, and the Asari women were trying on Italian Renaissance dresses. They were acting as if they had never seen such clothing styles before and were practically squealing with delight. And John realized that they probably had never seen such dresses before. Every single age, epoch, and culture had a snap shot of it preserved forever here and part of the fun of heaven was discovering all of them.

He continued towards the gate. He was determined to Take His Time.

And then he saw her.

She was a small child. Her hair was golden yellow and feathery. She had light eyebrows, two on each side, forming a lopsided V with the top reaching into the scalp. She had two long fingers on each hand and two long toes on each foot and her legs were like that of a deer or gazelle. Her lips were a rich pink and thin, and her skin had a faint but rich purple cast to it. She looked up to him and smiled and he could see little teeth across the front and two slightly extended canines. And her eyes . . . Her eyes were flashing little sparkles in the light, every color of the rainbow . . . Yet solid white . . .

Shining bright.

"Hi!" she said.

"You're a cute little thing you know that?"

"Daddy always said so. I'm so excited. He's going to be coming very soon. I've missed him."

"You came here before he did?"

"Yes, I came here even before Mommy did. She was very sad too when I had to leave her. She told me when she got here. But we're together again so it's alright."

"So you miss your Daddy?"

"Yeah, I love him very much. He was Mommy's hero. He's was a great soldier who killed lots of bad things before he became a teacher. He never was afraid. Mommy said so. She always depended on him to keep her safe."

"I bet your Daddy is sad that he is alone without you or your Mommy with him."

"Oh yes. He was so sad that Mommy visited him in a dream and told him it would be alright. And that made it all better, kind of. He still misses us. But Mommy says he has to work some more before he can come."

"So do you live here?"

"Oh no! I live up there!"

And she pointed to the sky. John followed her finger and suddenly the blue sky opened up and he saw an almost infinite display of stars.

"See the one right there?"

And he did. Somehow he did.

"You are a long way from home then," he said smiling. "You sure you are not lost?"

"You can't get lost here silly," she said with a little hooting giggle.

"Then how did you get here?"

"I wanted to be here," she replied simply. That clarified nothing to him but there was no further explanation forthcoming. She seemed to think that was all that was needed.

"Then why are you here?"

"I've been playing hide and seek with Rannoch! He can't hide very well, Tikkun is always shining and giving his hiding places away." she said proudly. "But I can hide real well. I climb up in the trees and Rannoch, He's so silly, He keeps looking under the stones to find me. I've hid in the trees a bazillion times and he never looks up. He always has to call my name and I say 'Here I am!' And then he tickles me!"

"I like him a lot!" she concluded. "So where do you live?"

"I just got here," said John. "And I'm going back now."

"Oh that's sad," she said with that childlike simplicity which didn't even begin to cover the reality. "But if you see my daddy when you get back tell him I miss him and I can't wait for him to get here!"

"I will," said John laughing.

And she scampered off running faster than a child her age ought to have been running. But with legs like hers he wasn't that surprised.

And then he realized she was Quarian and he had not asked her name or the name of her father. How would he know who to tell whom on the Migrant Fleet?

"Well there are only 17 million of them," he said half groaning. "All I have to do is narrow down the search to a single Quarian who's lost his wife and at least one daughter. Can't be more than a few dozen of those, provided he doesn't die before I get to them."

He had reached the gate and walked through. There was Peter sitting at the desk reviewing the next name in the book.

"Well Peter," he said with a sigh. "I'm heading back to hell."

"Not entirely," replied Peter. "But I don't at all want to be you. I had a hard enough time dealing with the fact that I was only going to be crucified. And that was before I got here."

"Only crucified? That is the worse torture ever invented. There's nothing more painful than that."

"I was upside down however. That killed me much faster than if I had been right side up and able to use my legs. Compared to what you are about to go through, knowing what you now know about here, it will be worse for you. It won't be the physical or psychological pain . . . It will be the memories of here that will get to you. And the fact that God won't answer all your questions, and the fact that you won't know how it's going to work out."

"Why do I feel like I ought to be regretting this decision but somehow don't?"

"Because you know that it's a right decision. Or rather, one that is righter than the decision to stay. There is good, and there is even better. Anyway, we'll have plenty of time to talk about it when you get back."

"Why bother?" laughed John. "It's only going to end up in that book of yours."

"No it's not," replied Peter. "That page is already passed. You died right and proper. There will be no more writing on your life in that book. All is now for your memories. So it'll be something for you to tell me about when we have our next fish fry."

"You have fish fries?"

"Well of course we do. You think we didn't know what to do with olive oil when I was a fisherman? Of course Aunt Jenny's batter, she was Lt. Colonel Anderson's cook before the Emancipation, dee li cious! Virginia fish fries I must admit are superior to the Gallilean ones. But you haven't really experienced paradise until you try Roman cheesecake. Like German Potato Soup there are five thousand different recipes, and all of them are just as rich and creamy. Nothing like those poor French imitations. There was this Roman baker and his family just three blocks from the forum, mmm mmmm mmmmmm! I passed that store every day when I was teaching publicly before Imperator Nero lost it. I swear I prayed them into heaven just for their cheesecake."

John laughed and Peter saw him down the road. He took yet another step and . . .

It was all dark.


	9. Chapter 9 - Go Away Ghost!

_It was during those wilder days when everything was looking particularly dark that I asked John what he had felt like when he had learned that Cerberus had rebuilt him. He smiled and answered, "We humans have a saying. 'Even a broken clock is right twice a day.'"_

_In order to understand the statement since I know many of my readers do not understand exactly what John would have meant, let me start by explaining how the first mechanical clocks of the humans were designed. Invented both by the Emperors of China and by Monks of the European Middle Ages . . ._

_. . . thus the meaning of the saying becomes obvious, there is no human group however evil, which fails to do something good on occasion._

_From "The Man Tali Loved"_

Pain. Pain. Pain. Mind numbing Pain. No sound. Pain. Can't see. Pain. Body encased in concrete. Pain. Pain. Pain. Can't move. Pain. Pain. Pain. Must see. Pain. Must open eyes. Pain. Pain. Pain. I need to breath. Pain. No air. Pain. Dark. Pain. Cold. Pain. In a coffin. Pain. Pain. Pain. I was in paradise. Pain. I was joking with Peter. Pain. God was there for me. Pain. The city was utopia. Pain. I left it. Pain. The Reapers are coming. Pain. There will be Pain. Pain. I must wake up!

A woman's voice, "There on the monitor. Something's wrong!"

A man's voice, "He's reacting to outside stimuli. Showing an awareness of his surroundings. Oh my God, Miranda, I think he's waking up.

The woman, Miranda? Her accent is . . . Australian? "Damn it, Wilson, he's not ready yet. Give him the sedative."

The man, he's balding, scruffy beard, dark grey clothing. The woman, strong face, raven hair, dark blue eyes. She would be beautiful if it were not for her hard cold soul. There is anger and bitterness behind those eyes. Such a waste. It will mar her beauty swiftly as the years pass.

"Shepherd, don't try to move," she says.

"You don't understand," he thinks. "You haven't much time. They are coming, they will destroy you, harvest you, leave nothing but remnants behind for future archeologists to speculate about and make myths to explain."

"Just lie still, try to stay calm," she says.

"I was dead. I am alive. I am in pain. I wish to get up. Is this body still not ready?" he thinks. His nerves are screaming for activity. His soul is trying to reintegrate with this new body but so much was lost the soul has to relearn.

"Heart rate still climbing, brain activity is off the chart," snaps Wilson. "Stats pushing into the red zone. It's not working."

Miranda walks to his right. He follows with his vision. She is wearing a skin tight outfit pinched so that every curve and crevice of her back from the neck to the ankle is clearly outlined. She might as well be wearing only a coat of paint. An outfit designed to sexually stimulate. It is not what he wanted to see. He curses her inwardly. He turns to look up.

"Another dose, now!" she says.

"Heart rate dropping," says Wilson. "Stats falling back into normal range."

He pauses. "That was close. We almost lost him."

"I told you your estimates were off," she says. "Run the numbers again."

She leans over him. She is analyzing the situation. She is a doctor with a patient. There is concern, but not for him. For something else. He sees her face closely. It's a young face, a soft face. There are pale pink lips. The eyes are a sapphire blue. She would be so pretty if she were not so arrogant, cold, angry . . . and slutty.

He closes his eyes. He is ready to sleep. The pain is going away. He is back. He is back from the dead. And already he wishes he had stayed in heaven.

He dreams of Tali. Of sweet soft lips kissing him. Of strong thin fingers caressing his lips. Of a chirping voice and bouncy feet. Of a girl who thinks of others far more than she thinks of herself. It's the only thing that he can imagine is worth staying alive for right now.

And she has been without him all this time. She could have already bonded with someone else. He is afraid he has lost her forever. No. No. Jesus said she still mourned for him. That doesn't prove anything. Jesus said that a young girl would receive the greatest surprise. He would be a prince that flew down from the moon. But He knows all possibilities. It could be Liara. There could be another woman on the crew of the first Normandy. It could be another woman entirely. The surprise could be in a year or two. There are too many variables. To many possibilities.

And he kept his eyes shut. He never even saw her face.

He doesn't want any one else. He wants her!

"Oh God please don't do this to me Oh God please don't do this to me Oh God please don't do this to me . . ."

He sleeps. There is calm. There is peace. Somehow, it's going to be alright.

. . .

The wakey wakey alarm was not Tali's gentle voice whispering into his ear. It was not the shining of the sun in his eyes and the chirping of birds coming through the open summer window. It was not the chime of a church bell. It was not the voice of Miranda shaking him awake. It was not the loud obnoxious buzz of an alarm clock. It was the shattering of exploding glass.

Miranda told him to wake up, that the place was under attack. It took him three tries to actually get his body to respond to his will.

"Damn that woman," he grumbled. "So much new body, my soul hasn't learned it's ways yet. I need therapy!"

He finally was able to get out of bed . . . By falling off of it. Then the arms were flailing for what seemed forever. The legs were just refusing to cooperate in the slightest. He crawled to where a pistol was supposed to be according to her instructions. Then he spent a full forty five eternal seconds trying to actually stand up. It took him another thirty seconds just to unload the pistol, remove the thermal clip and then practice aiming the thing and pulling the trigger so he would at least be able to fight. Sort of.

Then he was able to reload the pistol with it's thermal clip. Then he had the fun of trying to make his fingers work properly so he could get body armor on.

Then it was slow, careful, methodical and disciplined getting the body to respond to his soul's recollection of N7 training. If he screwed up he would be dead and the whole point of this would be a complete and total waste.

No . . . It wouldn't be. God was not so stupid as to send him down here and then accidentally get him killed. It was like the stupidity of Herod killing all those baby boys in Bethlehem thinking that somehow, some way, God, after spending 2,000 years telling the world that a Savior was coming, even to the point of explaining when and where, had failed to grasp the simple fact that by becoming mortal He could be killed. Yeah, like God was gonna look at His mangled infant body hacked to pieces by Herod's men and say 'oops!'.

But that didn't mean John wouldn't be a very holy bullet repository for the next six months while someone somewhere pulled them out of him and patched him back up with all that brand new and improved shiny PAIN.

Don't be stupid,  
Be a smarty,  
Stay out of pain,  
For the Reaper party!

"Really stupid rhyme there, John," he mused to himself, working his way down the corridors. But for the time it was helping him to clarify the situation. He was learning fast, swinging into the rhythm of battle, punctuated by the music of the machine gun, the rhythmic rattling of the bullet slamming into steel walls, and the melodious screams of the dying station members as they fell to the advancing combat robots that were everywhere.

Then he saw another man. Dressed in black, with a black icon outlined in white on his breast. Someone, anyone, being shot at like him. A friend about to _become_. Combat had that effect upon men. He ducked and landed by the man.

He was a young man, strong, lanky, possessing that muscular structure and rich brown ebony skin which so often marks the man of African heritage.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were still a work in progress?" the man said.

His accent made it clear he was not African. He was from America. There was a story behind those folk, they had first been slaves, then segregated, then the victims of one of the nasty genocides of the 20th and 21st centuries. It had not been the into the camp and shoot or gas kind. It had been a national conspiracy at the highest levels which sought to make them first dependent and then dysfunctional so they might simply fail to reproduce and die off. It had been a subtle genophage that one. Like most genocides of Earth's history, the historical records were faint and sketchy during the main efforts, since like all government crimes, it was done by word of mouth and silent understanding. But like all government crimes, it had first originated in the brandy and cigar and tea party discussions of the rich and powerful, and books had been published advocating it, clubs had been formed to advance it, and science had been invented to justify it. The paper work was large and long and elaborate, up the decade before it had been implemented, just like the Jewish genocide. And then, silence, until the African soldiers of the Black Russian Crusade had marched into the streets of the Capital and put an end to that decadent make believe Republic.

Since then, the American Africans had slowly recovered their family strength and numbers. And is so often the case with those whom the bastards tried to eradicate, they had come out stronger and better as a result.

He was the strong type, nobility and confidence were in his face. He was a soldier. John knew he would be a dependable ally.

"I just woke up, again," answered John. "You probably know more than I do!"

"Right, sorry about that," answered the man. "I'm Jacob Taylor. I've been stationed here for . . ."

New mechs opened up on them, and they were busy shooting for a moment. Then during a brief lull as various formerly animated steel, plastic, and electronic parts sparked and smoked, Jacob spoke again.

"Things must be worse than I thought if Miranda has you running around. You were supposed to remain asleep until your scars had healed, and then there was an estimated six months of therapy so you would be able to learn how to use your body again. And here you are up and shooting! You recovered fast!"

"I had help," suggested John. But Jacob had just alleviated one annoyance. Miranda had apparently intended to take more time. That was a good quality in her.

"Look I know you have a lot of questions, but we need to get to the shuttle first. Then I can fill you in."

John nodded, and they set out.

During the next few moments, they were weaving through rooms and down hallways, trying to avoid direct confrontation with the mechs. But Jacob was a soldier. He knew the number codes, he knew how to dance the battle dance. John quickly set the foot work and they were moving. During the time, Jacob explained what he thought John did not know, namely that John had been dead, and that he had been put back together by the team of scientists at the facility that was now filled with mechs trying to kill them. John let him talk. He figured this was not the time to engage in a metaphysical discussion. Those could prove to be rattling on the nerves and often worked best when accompanied by numerous mugs of beer, or wine if you happened to be a Greek in Athens. Jacob clearly was of the opinion that human life was entirely within the body and that nothing survived death. So as far as Jacob was concerned, this was all new and shiny to John. Then Jacob dropped the bomb. Cerberus had rebuilt him. John found that not so much shocking, as ironic. Accordingly one could not say that the trip to the shuttle had been without surprises.

Two grenades were necessary to clear the next pathway. Then they found Wilson, who was more than eager to get out of the station. He was firmly of the opinion that Miranda was dead, or a traitor, but at least dead, and his tone suggested she had better stay dead too. John was suspicious.

Consequently he was not entirely surprised when Wilson opened the door to the shuttle evacuation room, and the following exchange took place, very dramatically timed.

"Miranda! But you were . . ." began Wilson.

A pistol interrupted the sentence with it's own opinion along with a complimentary bullet, minus the point.

"Dead?" finished Miranda with a ironic tone directed as the warm corpse that had been Wilson thumped it's objections by impacting the floor in response.

Miranda was firmly of the opinion that Wilson had betrayed them. And as she was never wrong, in her opinion at least, there was nothing else for it. Shepherd however had a sneaking suspicion that in this case, she was in fact right.

"And we wonder why the aliens think we are treacherous," he thought to himself.

The shuttle trip consisted of Miranda engaged in damage control, vis a vis Shepherd's needs to be brought back up the speed since, in her opinion, Shepherd had no memory of the time in which he was dead. Again, it was not the time for a metaphysical discussion on life after death, but he was determined to throw a few curve balls at her.

They talked of his family, his mother Hannah, who he was pleased to learn was still alive, his survival of the Skylian Blitz, his naval career, and N7 training. There was the discussions about his activities as a Specter, and the missions to the various planets were discussed but none so greatly as Virmire where Ashley had been left to die. He was still angry with himself over that. He now could see how it could have been handled better. If they had waited a bit longer to get the bomb in play or considered more carefully their options for placement they could have collected the entire team and no one would have died. That was the problem with decisions, they had consequences.

She finished with the end of the Battle of the Citadel.

"You left out one detail," answered Shepherd. "One very important detail."

"Oh?" asked Miranda. "I can assure you that the file was very through."

John shook his head and smiled. It was after all his life, not hers they were discussing.

"I fell in love on the Normandy and was going to marry the woman."

"There is no mention of that in the file," she stammered. Could she be wrong on something? She called up her omni-tool and began to scan.

John continued to grin. He waited just long enough to see to it that a little self-doubt was put into her psyche.

"The woman was Tali'Zorah vas Neema," he finished. "She is a Quarian. And since Cerberus pushes for the advancement of human interests, it does not surprise me that bit of information was somehow 'forgotten' when you were given the dossier on me."

Her expression seemed to convey relief that she was perfect after all and it was someone else's fault. But it was enough for the moment. He knew she would have to face fallibility sooner or later.

The shuttle was a long ranged design which was able to move from one stellar system to another with ease. There was not much in the way of amenities, but the trip was short enough. And during that time John became more acquainted with the present situation which was as he expected, snafu, an old American abbreviation for Situation Normal All Fouled (or stronger language) Up.

And he was to meet Miranda's boss, the head of Cerberus, known only as The Illusive Man.

Run Run Run,  
Fast as you can,  
Can't catch me,  
I'm the Gingerbread Man.

"Umm Hmmm?" mused John's thoughts. He knew the ending of that fairy tale. The trick was, he had to be the fox crossing the river.

"Know your enemy and know yourself," said Sun Tzu.

"Be as innocent as a dove, but as subtle as a serpent," said St. Paul.

He would incorporate all four.

The Illusive Man might have his own ideas as to the purpose of this first meeting, but John had his as well. After all, since his death he had met a few people a wee bit more important and powerful than the Illusive Man.

This first meeting would be two fold. First try to get an idea of why Cerberus had been the one to bring him back. Second, to try to get an insight into how he was going to defeat the Reapers when he had every reason to smell treachery in every corner in this organization. It's not that he didn't trust Jacob. He knew Jacob was in the organization for good reasons. There were good people in every organization because humans suffered from a distinct inability to be omniscient. No one knew all the facts of the case. It's not that he was ready to imagine Miranda would betray them, she had a personal stake in the success of this Lazarus Project. If things did not pan out, she was . . . a failure. That was simply psychologically unacceptable to her. She would betray the Illusive man long before she would betray him. But he knew first hand what Cerberus was capable of. For all their claims of advancing humanity's best interests, it was with Cerberus firmly in charge of the advancement and for that, individual humans were merely tools to be used, even hacked to bits or 'modified' for the greater good.

So he walked into an empty room, and started to see computer reading lasers copying his image. He was not surprised. He probably would never talk to the Illusive Man face to face. That's what men who had something to hide did.

He found himself looking at a holographic image of an office with a massive window view of an exploding sun's surface. That was very close in orbit to the star and there had been a fortune spent in insulation. But somehow John was of the opinion that the Illusive Man was more than willing to spend an awful lot of money to get what he wanted. Which meant that he had an awful lot of money to spend.

"I wonder how many fingers he has in all the pies," John thought to himself. "More than his fair share of ten certainly."

"Commander Shepherd," began the Illusive Man.

"Illusive Man," replied John. "I see we are not meeting face to face.

"A necessary precaution," replied the Illusive Man. "Not unusual for people who know what you and I know."

"Including the part about not trusting each other," thought John. "He fears assassination. He wants to live forever."

"You might be part of the reason why I'm alive," John said out loud. "But that doesn't mean I trust you."

It is seldom wise to deceive a man, especially a powerful one, and the truth can always be told in such a fashion to hide more of the truth. But finally, if there was to be any hope of trust, any hope of influencing this man, Shepherd knew he had to be honest from the start. Otherwise nothing he said or did would ring true and The Illusive Man would, at least at a subconscious level, suspect.

"You need to put your personal feelings aside," replied the Illusive Man. "Humanity is up against it's greatest threat of our brief existence."

"Be reasonable, do it my way," translated John's thoughts. "And if you don't trust me, that's your problem." The reference to the Reaper threat was merely the means to get Shepherd to go along with The Illusive Man's agenda. Trust wasn't a feeling, it was an act of will based upon direct evidence. It was granted as a courtesy to strangers up to a point, but for those who's record was already available, it wasn't a right.

Likewise John was not in the mood to belabor the obvious, even while he was sorely tempted to make an association with a lack of fecal matter and Sherlock Holmes. Because after all, this was the first powerful man he was connecting with who actually was on the ball on this one topic.

"The Reapers," he said out loud.

"Good to see your memory's intact," answered the Illusive Man. "How are you feeling?"

"You need to earn the right to ask me those sorts of questions," answered John.

"Just so you know I'm not going to put 'personal feelings' aside," he was thinking.

"Cerberus isn't as evil as you believe," suggested the Illusive man.

"On a scale of what to what?" thought John.

"You and I are on the same side. We just have different methods," continued the Illusive Man.

"Oh, if Liara and Garrus could be here now," mused John remembering a talk they had had back on the old Normandy. He began to miss that old crew. Things were some what simpler in those days, though no less dangerous.

"Cut to the chase," he said. "What are the Reapers doing that made you decide to bring me back?"

"We're at war. No one wants to admit it, but humanity is under attack. While you've been sleeping . . . "

"Now there's an interesting image," thought John.

". . . entire colonies have been disappearing, human colonies. We believe it's someone working for the Reapers, just as Saren and the Geth aided Sovereign. You've seen it yourself. You've bested all of them. That's just one reason why we choose you."

"The enemy of my enemy is my friend," thought John. "For once Cerberus is actually trying to do something right."

"If what you say is true . . . If the Reapers are behind this . . . I'd consider helping you," he answered.

"I'd be disappointed if you accepted any of this without seeing it for yourself," continued the Illusive Man.

John nodded to himself. That was an appeal for trust. 'Personal Feelings' were not to be put aside on this matter.

"I have a shuttle ready to take you to Freedom's Progress, the latest colony to be abducted. Miranda and Jacob will brief you."

"Is this a volunteer job or am I being volunteered?" asked John. The Illusive Man was a man used to getting his way. It would not have surprised him if after the appeal to trust, he would have been ordered just like any one else. Of course he knew already that he had to go. He had to see what had happened. But he wasn't going to make it easy for this Rich Powerful Bastard, if only to remind that man that he was his own man as well.

"You always have a choice, Shepherd," began the Illusive Man.

"Except for this assignment," thought John.

"If you don't find the evidence we're both looking for, we can part ways."

Again, a curious qualifier. An illusion of being able to walk away, based on the Illusive Man's judgement of the 'evidence'. John smiled.

"But first, go to Freedom's Progress. Find out any clues you can. Who's abducting colonies? Do they have any connection with the Reapers?" ended the Illusive Man. "I brought you back . . ."

"You owe me," thought John.

". . . It's up to you to do the rest."

And with that the communication ended.

Shepherd was not happy about arriving at Freedom's Progress. In theory, there would be no one to encounter. There would be no danger. What was there to fear from a colony that was absent all people? But Miranda and Jacob were not trained. There had been no drill, and Shepherd was no longer military. He had no real authority. To pound the numbered cadence code talk into those two would be difficult. Jacob was a soldier. John suspected that he would quickly catch on. But Miranda? Her taking orders? Her taking orders under the rigors of N7 training? That girl was too cocksure of herself.

A bunch of people with guns no more made a Fire Team than a pile of stone and wood made a house. He couldn't remember who said that one, but he knew that there was a good chance there would be death if something bad did show up.

And as he came out of the shuttle, on an snowing overcast night, on a colony whose automatic lights illuminated empty houses and streets, he could almost hear Garrus speculating that something trying to shoot them would show up shortly.

And it did. Security, guard, and combat mechs. It could have been worse. But it could have been better. Miranda proved to have biotics, and she was willing to shield Jacob and himself as the rear point of the triangle which was advancing flat side first per John's orders. Jacob likewise was able to understand the concept of concentrated fire on the mech closest to the team. They got through the first few encounters. But it wasn't a piece of cake and robot mechs were the least dangerous opponent a soldier could face on the field.

And then they slammed right into something that they had never expected.

"Of all the gin joints, in all the towns, in all the world, she walks into mine…"

Classics are books, paintings, movies, or plays where regardless of the person, time, or the place, they see in that work of art something that they can relate to. He wasn't Rick. It wasn't in the town of Casablanca in the land of Morocco. There was no gin within lightyears, let alone a gin joint. And it wasn't immediately obvious that it was a she. And even if he had noticed there was one it would not have been the one Rick thought had betrayed him. (Human treachery yet again). There was no African-American pianist. And there was no song to say "Play it!" to that pianist.

But that was the line that flitted through his mind in a very short matter of seconds, because the odds were just as outrageously against it.

There was a fire team of jumpy Quarians (were there any that were not?). There was a leader who was telling John's team to freeze.

And then a woman's voice broke through.

"Prazza, you said you'd let me handle this!"

She had spunk. She had authority. She was territorial. She was extra bouncy. She was dressed in purple. She had a voice that was way too familiar for John to not feel his heart begin to pound. And then, even though it was night, the sun began to shine. Even though it was snowing, the spring flowers began to bloom. Even though the streets were deserted, there were people dancing and singing upon them. For on her right hand, on her second finger, worn over the glove, was a woven braided copper ring of three wires with a small bead of copper on the top. Polished . . .

Shining Bright.

John put away his gun even though she was pointing a pistol at him.

He took off his helmet.

"Wait!" she stammered.

"Tali? It's me, John."

He could see her breathing coming in gasps.

"No! NO! NO! You are a CERBERUS NIGHTMARE! Come to haunt me!"

"Tali, do you remember the gift of the Geth Data," said John. "and the Christmas chocolate?" He knew this would be hard. But even so her denial stung him harder than he could have imagined.

"I Saw His Body! HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME, CERBERUS!"

"Tali, I know this is hard. But it's really me. Test me, please," he said in a soft voice.

"If . . . You . . . Are . . . Yahn!" she growled. "What am I wearing?"

She held up, not her right hand with the copper ring, but the left hand.

"A glove," snorted Miranda.

"HOE GHE LAH SAY BOSH'TET!" Tali shouted at Miranda clenching her fist and shaking it under Miranda's nose.

"Are we done with riddles?" snapped Miranda.

John smiled. He remembered.

"You'll need to know that if you do what I ask," Christ had said.

"Under your glove, on your second finger, is a silver band, with five diamonds inset. And inside the band, is the inscription, 'To My Tali Duck'. I got it for you the day you and Liara went on your Girly-girl visit to the wards of the Citadel."

Her whole body was now visibly shaking.

And then he added what he knew would break through.

"I kept my eyes closed, Tali. You're not allowed to fly to the moon."

"NOT YAHN! NOT YAHN! NOT YAHN!" she screamed throwing herself at him and beating on his chest with her fists. "GO AWAY GHOST! LEAVE ME! TAKE AWAY THE PAIN! MY HEART! I STILL FEEL THE STABS! YOU ARE DEAD! I CRIED OVER YOUR BODY! GO AWAY! LET ME BE! I DON'T WANT TO CRY ANY MORE! I DON'T WANT TO REMEMBER LOSING YOU FOREVER!"

She leaned against him and wept, her body heaving with the grief so long hidden and suppressed. She was still trying to push through him, still trying to make the ghost go away. It was all screaming back to her. That last letter that told her how much he loved her. Her reply that the Admirals had approved the transfer and she would soon be back in his arms. The sudden stabs of pain in her heart and fear of something horrible happening. The returned message that the address was no longer valid. The beginning of the desperate search to find out what was happening. And then the message from Liara, that the Normandy had been destroyed, and her Yahn was dead. Then the funeral Mass, his body lying in the coffin. His face, his armor, his hands holding a crucifix, the white pall over the coffin. Her meeting his mother, Hannah telling her about the letters John had sent all about his new girlfriend. The one he was going to marry as soon as he could. How he had already gotten the engagement ring. His mother holding her as she wept, telling her how lucky her son had been to have found such a loving girl. And then his mother wept with her.

They were still corresponding.

Prazza and the other Quarians were still too stunned by what they were seeing to react. To hear an Admiral's daughter call a Cerberus agent a ghost, to know that the ghost had a name of John Michael Shepherd (for who else would Tali be in such a state over) was just a little too eerie for them to just stand there and remind her that they were on the planet for a mission.

After all, there isn't a single living sentient being in the galaxy who is not, on some level, afraid of ghosts.

Gently John lifted her hands to his shoulders. Almost by instinct she locked onto them with her fingers.

"The ring was in my armor pouch when the Normandy exploded and blew me away from Joker's escape pod. When Liara recovered my body, she found it and reading the inscription, knew it to be a gift for you."

Miranda was now looking at him with wide open eyes.

"Go ahead Miranda. Tell Tali, _my fiancé_, what happened to the body next? When Liara gave it to you."

Miranda's jaw was hanging loose off her face. Her eyes were so wide they were about to fall out of her head and bounce away on the pavement. Jacob, with that classic frozen tableau of uncertainty and fear in his face, his brown and white eyes shifting from Miranda to Shepherd, didn't even realize that he was still aiming his pistol, with both hands, at a low star on the horizon between two buildings.

"How could you . . ." she began. He wasn't supposed to know what had been happening while he had been dead. And she had seen no reason to enlighten him.

"There's more to death than a space ravaged corpse," answered John. "Now tell her, so we can get to the bottom of this without any more deaths. I for one, happen to be very happy right now, and I want that happiness to spread in the right direction."

Tali, realizing that she was still holding on to this . . . ghost . . . which of course you are not supposed to be able to do with ghosts . . . turned her head to face Miranda.

"The head of Cerberus ordered me to bring back Shepherd since he was the only one among the humans who understood the threat of the Reapers. Since then we have worked to rebuild his body. Then he recently awoke," said Miranda. "Tali, who ever you are, this is John Michael Shepherd. This is the body Doctor Liara T'Soni gave me. The one at the funeral you saw."

"Miranda speaks the truth," added Jacob, putting away his pistol and coming into some semblance of normalcy. "For what it's worth . . . Tali . . . Commander Shepherd has already spoken of how he loves you. It's one of the things he talked about as we were going through his life."

Tali had looked at Miranda. Then she slowly backed away from John and just looked at him with those pale white eyes and dim outline of her nose. John could see the tear drops reflecting off the street lights beneath her eyes.

"Tali," he said. "I know it's been hard. I know that over time love left unfulfilled fades. But for me it's been only a couple of days. I still love you as deeply as I did when I was thinking of you in those last few seconds trying to plug up that last hole in my spacesuit before I died, as the wreckage of the Normandy drifted towards the planet beneath me. If all you have left is the grief. I will understand. I will move on. But I want you back if you will have me."

It was at this point that Prazza decided enough was enough and that the present mood needed to be broken.

"I'm not taking any chances with these Cerberus operatives," he snapped. He wasn't sure what was going on, but it was Cerberus and that meant deceit and subterfuge. This could very easily be some nasty little trick. Tali needed to be reined in and taken back to the ship before she ended up doing something utterly foolish.

"Put those weapons down!" screamed Tali. She was still shaking. Either she was at the beginning of the most wonderful dream she had ever envisioned or it was the start of a horrible nightmare. She didn't know which. She . . . needed . . . more . . . time! At least to get control of her heartbeat.

"We are only here to investigate what happened to this human colony," John said to Prazza.

"Which we are well within our rights to do so," pointed out Miranda.

"You'll pardon us for not taking you at your word, Cerberus," answered Prazza.

"I'd like to know what the Quarians are doing here," countered Miranda. When in doubt, accuse the other side of being just as underhanded.

"I said 'weapons down' Prazza. What ever is going on here we don't need another fight," snapped Tali. Her head was swiveling from her Quarian companions to John and back again. Everything she remembered about John was all being confirmed.

Even the nose hairs. He needed to trim those nose hairs.

There was only one difference. He had scars on his face. Scars which glowed red underneath. But that would make perfect sense if he had been truly killed. She knew what space did to a corpse, how one side was boiling away while the other side was freezing solid. She knew that it was a wax face on the body. His real face would have been a horrible fright of destruction.

"One of our people was here on pilgrimagh. His name was Veetor. We need to find him," she said.

"Isn't that a little strange? A Quarian visiting a human colony?" asked John. He wanted Tali to be able to explain it so that Miranda and Jacob would understand. There was something in the air. Prazza would not be angry at Cerberus for no reason what so ever. John did not want this to end in tragedy. He wanted Tali back.

"Quarians can choose where ever they wish to go on pilgrimagh. Veetor liked the idea of helping a small settlement. He was always . . . nervous . . . in crowds," she explained.

"Whoo boy," thought John. When a Quarian thinks one of their own is jumpy . . .

"She means that he was unstable," interjected Prazza clearly determined to stay in charge. "Combine that with damage to his suit's CO2 scrubber and an infection from an open-air exposure, and he's likely delirious."

"When he saw us landing," broke in Tali. "He hid in a warehouse on the far side of town. We also suspect he programmed the mechs to attack anything that moved."

Shepherd immediately knew that he was getting a twofer. It was human colonists who were disappearing. It would make perfect sense for a non-human to be overlooked. And it would make perfect sense that this non-human would known what had happened. Tali and information as to what was happening. It just couldn't get any better. Well maybe if they lost the hostile mechs and there was a cache of cold beer in a fridge next door.

"Veetor is the only one who can tell us what happened here. We should work together to find him," he exclaimed. Working on a team with Tali would only make it clearer to her that he was really he. It was getting better all the time.

"Good idea," she said. She was thinking the same thing. If he really were John, she would see him in operation. And if he were a ghost, well things couldn't get any worse because ghosts were no good on a battle field anyway. Mechs wouldn't pay the slightest bit of attention to scary stuff. "You'll need two teams to get past the drones anyway."

"Now we're working for Cerberus?" exclaimed Prazza.

"No Prazza, you're working for me!" snapped Tali. "If you can't follow orders, go wait on the ship."

So she was in command of this operation. That made sense to John. She had been given extensive training. And she had started to talk about command issues with him . . . Once upon a time. There was a sudden wave of sadness which came over him. There would be so much work to do before they could truly be back together. There was a wide gap between them. She had been separated from him for over a year. He had only been separated for five weeks.

They split into two teams and set out. But Prazza ran ahead, determined to have as little to do with Cerberus as possible. The result was casualties. Several of them. One Quarian girl was held down by the mech's foot and a machine gun was emptied into her body at point blank range. Shepherd was in a rage. That girl could have been Tali. He pulled out the grenade launcher, and fired at the mech. The explosion on the head messed with the programming. Jacob's firing at the center coupled with a Miranda's biotic yanking of some memory chips underneath put the mech out of commission.

A handful of Quarians were left alive. John helped Tali pull them into a building and worked to get them comfortable. There was medi-gel for wounds and anti-bodies for infections. Then he went over to Tali and insisted that he check her suit for damage.

Tali wasn't sure about that, but it was clear that this Yahn (real or fake) was terrified something bad could have happened to her. That much was obvious. He did not make any grabs, he did not try to touch her, but he kept looking over her suit and asking about this bit of damage or that bit of damage and it wasn't until she had reviewed each and every single smudge and chip that he backed off relieved.

Her heart was still aching, but it she began to realize that it wasn't the ache of separation. It wasn't the ache of grief. It was the ache of longing. She kept looking at him. He had fought like Yahn. He was concerned like Yahn. But what amazed her most, was that he fought better and was even more concerned than she remembered him. There was something more alive about him. There was something more good about him. There was even something more Yahn Michael Shepherd about him.

But he was working for Cerberus. And Cerberus was the enemy. Cerberus had sabotaged the fleet.

Veetor was found. Veetor was afraid. Shepherd calmed him, and then stood between Miranda and Jacob and protected him from going to Cerberus.

Veetor told them that the colonists had been frozen in place and then methodically taken by the collectors. That hidden obscure unknown alien race that were beyond the Omega 4 Relay. Where no ship had gone and returned from. It stank of Reaper strategy, for nothing was left; there were no men, no women, no children, not even infants. Everything else was left behind. It wasn't even the behavior of predators. It was the mark of genocide. Shepherd was clearly angry about it. But he kept himself under control.

Tali kept struggling in her mind. She kept looking at this back from the dead Yahn. There was so much good there. There was so much that she remembered about him. But he was dead. This was not a ghost. He was too solid. But her Yahn had died on the Normandy. And the dead do not come back to life. Cerberus said they had brought him back to life. But what if it was Necromancy? What if it was . . . a clone? Her heart was screaming that it wanted the real Yahn. She needed to know it was the real Yahn. Until then, it was an aching horror story that she desperately wanted to be a fairy tale.

She thanked him for his help. But before she left with Veetor, he gently motioned her to the side. As much as she feared ensorcelment from an illusion, from a fake, she came. There was so much longing. There was so much desire to believe it was him.

He spoke in a low soft voice.

"I knew this wasn't going to be easy," he said. "I had no idea how hard it would be though. Tali my heart is breaking, I so much want to be with you. For me it's only been days since I saw you at that window of the Kwargo sailing away from the Citadel. For me it's only been days since I got my last letter from you telling me about how Auntie Raan was coming around and it looked like you were going to get that transfer approved and we were going to be together. But for you it's been over a year. It might as well have been over a century."

"I can't make you fall into my arms. I can't make you run away with me and fight the Collectors. And I can't even begin to expect you to understand why I am with Cerberus. I don't trust them, but they brought me back and they are the only link I have with a galaxy that happily buried me. All I can do for now is this."

And he put his new extra-net address into her omni-tool.

"When you are ready," he said. "Send me a letter that you are ready to talk. At least then I will know I am free to send you more of those sappy love letters I was so fond of writing."

Tali silently giggled in spite of herself.

"And maybe, just maybe, we can start again. At least this time you know that your Commander Shepherd already loves you. There won't be any need of a speech about now that you've said it you can be sent off to the Migrant Fleet. . ."

"Yahn!" she said. "No more! No more! The pain I thought was gone has come back, and the memories are only making it hurt more. I want to believe that it's you. But I need more time. I need to know you are not . . . a Cerberus trick."

John nodded, and he and Miranda and Jacob left her on the colony and she watched the Cerberus shuttle take off and leave. She was both happy and terrified that her heart was aching as she saw him leave.

It would be another two days before she was able to get her team off of Freedom's Progress. Veetor was still a mess and she needed his help getting the rest of the team, all wounded thanks to Prazza's stubbornness, on to their ship. She spent much time holding Veetor before he was able to start to regain a semblance of normalcy and he kept worrying about the return of the Collectors.

But there was something she was able to do about John, something that was so much easier than it had been on the first Normandy. She was able to send a letter to Hannah Shepherd.

_Dear Hannah,_

_It's me, Tali. I don't know what to do. I just saw a ghost, but it was too real. I just met with John here on Freedom's Progress. He says he's alive again. That Cerberus brought him back. My heart is aching. I can't bear the thought of it being not real, and having to go back to grieving all over again. But I'm terrified this is a Cerberus trick. That I'll be lured into doing something horrible, like I'll betray my people and the fleet, because I so want it to be him. But the dead do not come back to life do they? Is there any sign that he could give that you would know if he were your son? Is there something a mother can say which will let me know I can fall back in love with him, be with him, bond with him?_

_Please tell me._

_Tali_

Four hours later, she got a response. It was one of the few letters she ever printed out, and folded up, and kept in her memento pockets of her suit.

_My dearest darling Tali,_

_You have no idea what your letter has done for this old woman. You have no idea what joy has filled my heart. You asked for a sign from his mother that John was alive? My dearest girl, You are that sign. Two days ago, I got a letter from him on the extra-net. It said it was him. He told me what had happened. He said the same things you said he told you, but even more. He told me what it was like being dead. But he also told me stories of his childhood that he knew only I could have known about. I was in horrible suspense. My heart was aching as you no doubt know it was. How could this have been? How could this be the work of Cerberus? What foul trick was this? I wanted to scream and pray and cry and shout all at once._

_And then I got a letter from you and you said you had seen him too._

_Sweetest Tali, we Catholics have a saying, 'By the testimony of two witnesses you shall know a thing to be true.' And yes Tali, people do come back from the dead. Our entire religion is based on it. It depends upon it. It is the sign by which we know it is true. I don't know how, I don't know why, but there has been a miracle for the two of us. I have my son back, and you have the man who loves you returned from the dead._

_What should you do? Love him, be with him, bond with him._

_Hopefully your future mother in law,_

_Hannah_

There was no one around to see Tali hug her omni-tool while she was crying and dancing around the room and thus preserve it for posterity. It was for a long time to come, the happiest memory she would have.

Once she could calm down she sent another extra-net letter.

_My own truly true really real John,_

_Dearest most wonderful John. I talked with your mother and she told me it was you. She also told me that she hopes she'll be my future mother in law. I hope so too._

_Please send me all the sappy love letters you can write. And then send some more. I'll do my best to answer every last one of them with all the sappy I can muster._

_Your Tali Duck_  
_P.S. I still don't like that you're working for Cerberus, but I know you have a plan for that. You always do._

_P.P.S. I guess I never stopped loving you. The rings should have clued me in. Never could explain to Auntie Raan why I wore that copper ring and only Liara knows about the silver one._

_P.P.P.S. I love you._

It would at this juncture be nice to say that they ran off, got married, and lived happily ever after. But as the old and wise will tell you, life happens while you're making other plans.

It was going to be a while, and more than a few sappy love letters, and really sappy love poems, before they would be back in each other's arms. Cerberus wasn't entirely happy about the situation, and neither was the Migrant Fleet though for entirely different reasons. And that was even before the Collectors and Reapers got involved though in defense of the Collectors and Reapers they didn't give a damn about the love story, they just wanted to kill and process everyone and Tali and John were two priority targets. But we'll get into that later.

Miranda sent a report to the Illusive Man the moment she received notice that Tali had sent that first love letter to Shepherd. And of course the Illusive Man was kept appraised as the correspondence between the two increased in both volume and density of the sap. Miranda did not approve, and she was concerned Jacob was sympathetic as well. John didn't know yet that she was monitoring all his communications thanks to a little spy program in his new Cerberus supplied up to date and oh so expensive and quality omni-tool.

The Illusive Man found the thing amusing. He reminded Miranda that Shepherd's love was a prior to death circumstance and Shepherd's mind had to remain his own, and thus his infatuation with Tali was to be tolerated. It was not to be discouraged, but likewise she was under no instructions to encourage it either. Tali was after all, not a human.

In the meantime, John had plenty to do and to think about. He didn't know what the Collectors were doing. He didn't know how it related to the Reapers, but he did know that he was going to have to stop it. And if Cerberus was the only thing that was going to be giving him help, then he was going to have to work with Cerberus. But every thing he did was going to have to be geared so that he would be in full control of the process. It would be a long campaign, and a subtle one. But at least he knew that the Illusive Man was not used to being disobeyed. By cooperation on the surface, John suspected that he would lull the Illusive Man's suspicions. After all, when no one ever says no to you, you don't learn the body language of resistance.

For Tali was right. He did have a plan, and Tali was an integral part of that plan. And it was not just because she was a cute little bouncy monkey duck either.

But it sure helped.


	10. Chapter 10 - A Gentle Face

The next meeting with the Illusive Man was again a game of Cat and Mouse with Shepherd cooperating on the surface all the while trying to shift matters into his more direct control. He learned that Freedom's Progress was the link that was needed to confirm that it was the Collectors who were involved, but the mystery was why, after paralyzing the humans, they were being methodically taken. That was not something the Collectors had done before. While they had been notorious for taking small groups of beings from slavers in the past, those had been selected for genetic reasons.

Groups of sentience beings taken for genetic reasons did not sit well with Shepherd at all even though they had been small samples. He remembered the history of the Master Race Ideologies which had haunted the 20th and 21st centuries of Earth, always being redefined when exposed and destroyed. But it was clear that the paralyzation attacks of those tiny insects employed by the Collectors would be a very dangerous weapon that had to be countered. Shepherd was going to have to get his hands on a very big can of bug spray. Fortunately there was one available, a Dr. Mordin Solus. He was on Omega, an old mining operation which had become a haven for mercenary and criminal forces in the Galaxy.

John was determined to get his old team back. But for now, Dr. Solus was a good lead. Then The Illusive Man either played a surprise, or a good will gesture. He had gotten Shepherd one of the best pilots available. And as Shepherd turned around he was surprised to find that Joker was standing behind him.

Joker was a good face to see. It was a connection to the past. Shepherd was glad to see him and said so. The news was what Shepherd expected it to be. The Council and the Alliance were busy insisting that there was no Reaper threat, Shepherd's death was a very convenient event for them and the team which Shepherd had worked so hard to forge during the struggle with Saren had drifted apart with out new guidance. But for Joker, the real slap in the face had been getting grounded. Cerberus had let him fly again. He was more than happy to work for them. Not that he trusted The Illusive Man. He didn't trust anyone who had more money than him. But he was flying and that was the bottom line.

This made John suspect that Joker was only part of a package, and when Joker showed him to a set of windows, and the lights went on, Shepherd was very pleasantly surprised that his suspicions had been confirmed.

It was a new ship, built along the lines of the old Normandy, but in Cerberus colors of white, with black and gold trim. It was twice the size of the old Normandy as well, and it contained the same stealth systems that the old Normandy had contained. She was a beautiful ship.

And Shepherd and Joker agreed, she would be the new Normandy. She set sail the next day under the new colors and as Shepherd walked over her, he couldn't help but wonder how excited Tali would be when she saw this brand new ship. For a Quarian Engineer, any brand new ship would be exciting, but to bring back the old good memories along with it would be even better.

But there was one more pleasant surprise. Accordingly his next letter went like this.

_Dear Tali Duck,_

_Joker and Dr. Karin Chakwas have joined Cerberus as well. They are the only one's who will let Joker fly and Karin is convinced he won't survive without her medical attention. And she prefers working for people who work for me anyway. We caught up on old times and I've promised her a good bottle of Serene Iced Brandy when I can find one. He is angry with the Alliance for having abandoned him after the loss of the first Normandy. But we have a new Normandy. She is twice the size of the old Normandy, and she's prettier as well. Joker is now the pilot and he's thrilled about the leather seats. It's not the old interior which made everything so dark, this ship is filled with light and color. I find it so odd that Cerberus has such good aesthetics. You would not think it from a group that does so many ugly things._

_It's just like home, only better looking._

_Still have Miranda and Jacob on the team, Jacob I think you'll get to like. He's a good man. There's also another girl on the crew I think you'll like, Kelly Chambers. She's very much happy bubbles. Supposed to be my administrative assistant as well as the ship's psychologist in charge of all sorts of crew issues. She'll be monitoring all my incoming mail so keep the suggestive language to a minimum. We don't want to embarrass her now too much._

_Kenneth and Gabby are the two engineers I've gotten to know. I think you'll like Gabby. Kenneth takes some getting used to. He's actually from Scotland. You know, back in the late 19th and early 20th centuries, Scotland was famous for it's engineers. Now days, that's all gone. The English government economic policies nearly destroyed the ship building industry in England and today, Scottish engineers are normally found only in old science fiction vids made in America. Still it's a fun accent to listen to, even if his vocabulary is a bit raw._

_You won't believe the cabin I've been given. It's an entire deck, Tali. There are couches, two desks, a place to build model ships, a huge aquarium (I think they really studied my childhood) and a Very Big Snuggly Bed (feel free to finish this sentence in any way you like)._

_I don't have any fish or models yet, I'd thought I would ask someone more qualified on the ships for what ship models should go there and someone who could also know how to best decorate the cabin so even they would be comfortable there. Any ideas?_

_Anyway, that's the latest. I will write more as soon as I have something new to report, like how I'm going to get you here on this ship._

_Love you and miss you,_

_John_

He did not think it wise to talk about EDI. EDI, the ship's AI was going to remind Tali too much like the Geth and it was bad enough that Cerberus had shoved a stick up the Quarian Migrant Fleet's spokes six months prior. That had explained Prazza's behavior, as well as Tali's anger. Even so, Tali's intervention had enabled Veetor's full data to be given to The Illusive Man who thought it a surprising olive branch. John had suggested that this was what came from playing nice, but The Illusive Man remained firmly of the opinion that as everyone already hated humans, it was best to do unto others before they did unto you.

Joker didn't care about EDI either.

Six hours later, Shepherd received another letter from Tali. This one was . . . interesting.

_Dear John my darling,_

_How interesting, joker working for cerberus?_  
_And it's nice to know that jacob is a good man._  
_Everything is getting crazy here with the talk of the new mission._  
_So this bed of yours sounds like a waste of resources, maybe you should think about sharing?_  
_Tomorrow i will be talking with the new fire team i will be coordinating._  
_Really nice marine in it who will be more competent than that idiot prazza._  
_On the other hand, i'm still wanting to join up with you on the new normandy._  
_More tomorrow, keep your eye out for opportunities._

_Your Tali Duck_

John looked at the letter again. And then did a quick check on his Omni-tool.

Then he connected with Joker on the intercom.

"Joker? Set a course for Haestrom. When you get there, engage the stealth systems. We'll be watching for a few days to see what happens."

"Commander that's deep in Geth Space, are you sure about this?"

"Very much so. I think there will be a need for cavalry to come charging in, and if not, charge in anyway. I have something we need to do if we are going to be a real team again."

"Commander Shepherd?" intruded EDI's voice. "You have not yet connected with Dr. Mordin Solus per the Illusive Man's instructions. Are you sure this is wise? If the collectors are not countered . . ."

"Well deal with that afterwards EDI," replied John. "I've got liberty to develop the team as I see fit and there are certain pieces of the puzzle which need to go into place before hand."

"As you say, Commander," she replied.

He then sent a letter back.

_To my Tali Duck_

_Only you could send such a silly letter._  
_Nothing seems the same any more does it?_  
_My plans are to get you here as soon as possible_  
_You should begin to think about packing_  
_When you get here, we'll talk about that bed._  
_And your sleeping arrangements._  
_You take care of yourself now._

_Your Really Real John._

Just how sneaky the two of them were being was not entirely certain, but John sensed that Tali was nervous about something or, she sensed an opportunity.

The Normandy made it to Haestrom in four days and simply waited in orbit, slipping away long enough to vent the heat before returning with stealth in place. It was proving to be a good shakedown cruise, which was John's official explanation to Miranda. He pointed out that staying this long this deep in Geth space was training the crew in all sorts of ways, particularly on the need to be on constant alert for long periods of time.

"The first Normandy did not see the Collector attack coming, because we did not realize that they could see through our stealth systems until just before they made their first attack," he explained. "I am training this crew, by pressure and fear of being found, to be on constant alert for any thing."

Miranda had no argument for that, but she suspected there was something else going on. It had not dawned on her that his extra-net letters would have been in code because she had not sensed that he was suspecting that she was engaged in routine intelligence reports to The Illusive Man, or Tim, as he and Joker were starting to refer to him as.

Three days into it, they spotted a Quarian vessel slipping into the system and John gave orders to shadow.

He sent a letter to Tali

_To my Tali Duck_

_I spy,_  
_With my little eye,_  
_Something that bounces._

_Your Really Real John_

And her reply was as follows.

_To my Peeping John,_

_Eek!_  
_You beast!_  
_You had better enjoy the view!_

_Your Monkey Duck_

John grinned. Let Miranda figure that one out.

Unfortunately she did. Once the Quarian vessel had been spotted, she reviewed all the extra-net exchanges and put it all together quickly enough. But she concluded that the smartest thing to do would be to continue to play dumb. If he was sending coded messages to Tali, so much the better to appear oblivious. It would prevent them from coming up with something more complex. Even so, Miranda knew that John was beginning to send out feelers for Cerberus's strengths and weaknesses. She continued to note the exchange of E-mails.

Within 45 minutes of the Quarian team landing, they were clearly in trouble. John announced that the Normandy would now perform a spontaneous rescue operation and swoop in. As far as John was concerned, swooping was good.

The sun's rays were of such high radiation that their shields would be shot if they moved into it. John couldn't help but remember that famous Greek retort to the Persians. They too would be fighting in the shade. With Miranda once again at back-point, and Jacob on his right, they moved through the ruins and slowly worked their way along. Geth drop ships were routinely strafing the battle field, but they were reserving their wrath for the Quarians. In spite of everything, by the time Shepherd connected with the leader of the Quarian Marine contingent, Kal'Reegar, he was the only Marine left alive.

Shepherd almost immediately liked the Quarian. As the sole survivor by that point, the marine had a good grasp of battlefield tactics, so good that Shepherd really wanted to recruit him as well. But when Kal informed him what was between them and Tali, Shepherd sobered up rapidly and began to fear for Tali's life.

"I don't know why you are here," he said. "But this ain't no time to be picky."

He motioned towards the door behind the Geth Colossus.

"Tali's inside over there. Geth killed the rest of my squad. And they're trying to get to her. Best I've been able to do is draw their attention."

"Are you sure she's still alive!" he shouted trying to control his emotions. Suddenly this wasn't a game any more. This wasn't a little eye spy. These were Geth, and they hadn't gotten any softer in two years. John began to curse himself for not swooping in sooner, or joining the Quarians when they had first landed. But that would have carried other consequences. Him showing up just as Tali landed would have gotten more than a few Migrant Fleet Intelligence Operatives itchy fingers. It might give them itches anyway, just him showing up now, but if he pulled a rescue off at this point, they might not care. As it was, he was making sure Tali would be with him on the Normandy as soon as he could get her safely off this rock.

"The observatory is reinforced," Kal chuckled. "Even the Geth will need time getting through it. And it's hard to hack a door when someone is firing rockets at you."

The military situation wasn't good. The Geth were at platoon level strength, and the Colossus had a repair protocol which caused it to huddle up and fix itself each time it's shields were broken through. Kal had tried to push closer but had gotten a bullet through his armor and into his suit. He was now breached.

"How bad is your suit damaged?" asked John. There was another life on the line if things were not dealt with quickly.

"I've got combat seals clamped down to isolate contamination and I'm swimming in antibiotics. Geth might get me. But I'm not going to die from an infection in the middle of a battle. That is just insulting!"

John really liked this guy.

Kal was ready to die to get Shepherd to Tali. His mission was to make sure she got back with the data for the Admirals. But John was not going to let him take one for the team. The moment Kal began to try more suppressing fire, John pulled him back down.

"I need you in case they bring up reinforcements!" he shouted.

John had a good assessment of the battle field, and knowing his team, he knew that he needed the advantage of elevation. Giving some brief instructions from Kal as to what was needed from his rocket launcher, he went to the right and worked his way along with Jacob, wearing down the minor Geth, counting on Miranda to maintain biotic shield strength longer than their normal shield strength would hold thus giving them more time to work on taking out the individual Geth platforms. But what's more, John fired off several of the overhead structures causing the sun to stream in on several Geth positions enabling him to shoot them up as their shields fried. A single grenade explosion over the Colossus put enough sun on that creature that it did not have the ability to perform repairs while it's shields were reinforced and once it tried to move, it was hit by Kal's rocket launcher and John's team. It exploded.

He ran up to the door.

"Just a second, Yahn, I locked the door to keep more Geth from coming inside," she said.

There was a sudden release of electronic resistance and John was able to get in.

For a second the two of them just looked at each other. For John, all the fear of losing her was now gone. He saw her and she was safe, what's more, they were back together.

For her, the dashing captain that she had thought she had lost forever, had just dashed in yet again for her. And this time she knew it really was her dashing captain. This time she knew it wasn't a ghost.

John almost lost his footing as she hit his front hard with her pounce hug. In a second her fingers had once again gone up his back and found his shoulder bones. He was locked in tight.

"Don't you dare dare dare ever die on me again you Bosh'tet," she whispered.

"I promise to do my best," he replied.

Miranda just stood there and crossed her arms and tapped her foot. Jacob smiled and shook his head. They did make a cute couple.

"We're going to have to be a little cool on the ship until I get an assessment of the crew," whispered John. "I don't think Miranda has informed them of the situation yet, and Joker has been keeping quiet as well. It may be because you've not been around for him to joke about it, or it may be because he and I already have a few little secrets between us."

"Not fair!" Tali pouted. "I yust got you back."

"I know I know I know, and I'll grovel at your feet in a frenzy of self-abnegation and beg for your forgiveness afterwards. And then I'll take you to Ryuusei's if they will have us."

"Alright, you're forgiven for the moment, but every day that this goes on is another trip to Ryuusei's Sushi," she whispered.

"I love it when you blackmail me," he teased.

Then she backed up and exhaled.

"If not for you I would have never made it out of this room. This whole mission has been a disaster," she grumbled. "I now wish I had yoined you on Freedom's Progress. But you were a ghost then, a terrifying nightmare that was only reminding me of the pain. And I didn't want to let anyone take my place on something this risky."

"A lot of Quarians have lost their lives here today," observed Shepherd with anger over the loss of life as well as the realization that he could have also lost Tali. "Was it worth it?"

"I don't know Yahn, it wasn't my call. The Admiralty board believed this information was worth sacrificing these lives for it. I have to believe that it was for the best."

"I'm not interested in the Admiralty, I'm interested in you," replied John looking stern.

"I lost friends today, Yahn," she replied. "This damned data had better be worth it."

"I'm sorry Tali," he said. He gave her another hug.

"I'm going to upload this data to the Admiralty," she said. "And then I'm going to yoin you on the Normandy. And if the Admiralty doesn't like it, they can burn in Tikkun. I yust saw all of my team die."

It was at this point that Kal limped in.

"Not all of them ma'am," he said.

Tali ran over and helped Kal close up with John and the rest of his team.

"Your captain is as good as you said. That damn Colossus never stood a chance," he said.

Kal was gotten back to the Quarian ship with a few more anti-allergens in his system provided by John's supplies. He said farewell to Tali and told John that he was to keep her safe.

John then turned to Miranda and Jacob once the Quarian vessel was safely away.

"I don't know how the Cerberus crew is going to respond to the fact that Tali is my fiancé," he replied. "Keep it quiet for a bit will you?"

"I have said nothing yet, Commander," replied Miranda. "Because the crew did not need to know."

"And I can be cool for a bit, Commander," assured Jacob.

John turned back to Tali and gave her helmet a gentle rap with his forehead.

"It will only be for a little while," he said.

And so they only sat together on the shuttle back. Once they were back however, Jacob, ever the idealist, welcomed her to the Cerberus team. Tali informed him, rather testily, that she was there for Shepherd and not Cerberus. Jacob then tried to get her interested in the engineering section and Tali began to brighten up. She met Kenneth and Gabby. He proceeded to show her to the quarters where she would be staying with Kenneth and Gabby, but it was clear she was not that interested in the sleeping arrangements. It was apparent she was thinking of other things. Then Jacob introduced her to EDI.

EDI popped into view gave Tali a cheerful hello and hoped they would be good co-workers together. She then mentioned that Joker was on board and glad Tali had made it safely. She also assured Tali that she would be there to assist in any engineering dilemmas that might pop up with the new machinery. John was too busy face palming to notice Tali's reaction. But he was very grateful that Tali had a dark grey visor which hid all the details of her face, save the eyes and nose. But Jacob was too oblivious to Tali's behind the visor stare at him extolling EDI's cutting edge AI qualities.

Tali informed Jacob that she would now get familiar with the engine room and turned her back on the two of them without so much as a thank you.

"Was it something I said?" asked Jacob as he and John rode the elevator up to the command level.

John sighed.

"Yes does not even begin to cover the breadth and depth of it."

"As my mother said, my mouth wasn't supposed to be that big for all the feet I put into it. Sorry Commander."

"You couldn't have known," answered Shepherd.

John continued to send little notes to Tali for a couple of days assuring her that as soon as the crew was ready, she would be in his cabin and they would once again start the adaptation for formal Quarian union. He wrote them on pieces of scrap paper in his office and then would slip them under her pillow when she was in engineering. She pouted about the separation but the notes were cute and sappy and she couldn't stand being that far away from him for long and began to join him at the table for meals. They began once again to talk of the things they had talked about back on the old Normandy and everyone began to notice they were chatting at each meal. But so far the consensus was that they were old teammates, as the crew had already noticed that John spent extra time with Joker as well.

Then the break came, after three days, as they made their way towards Omega.

"Commander?" began Kelly as he passed her on his way to see what the latest fracas between Joker and EDI was.

"Yes Kelly?"

"I've been noticing the body language of Tali and it's clear she wants to be more than friends with you."

"Really Kelly?" began Shepherd, with his eyebrows raised in the hopes that he would convey surprise. "This is a Quarian we are talking about, you know with levo and dextro and allergic reactions and everything?"

"Oh yes, but these things do happen, and I've been trained to spot it as part of my professional qualifications. You know unrequited love can produce tensions which can threaten the integrity of the mission. It's vitally important that you move quickly on such feelings, either gently discouraging them or acting upon them. Do you think you have chemistry with Tali?"

This was simply too good an opportunity to pass up. He flipped his intercom switch.

"Miss vas Neema?" he said. "Come up here for a moment to the main deck by Yeoman Chamber's station."

Tali picked up on the inside joke immediately as John's voice came to her. When ever he was in a mischievous mood on the old Normandy, he had called her Miss nar Rayya. While she wasn't about to get entirely into the swing of things, she was willing to give him a chance. His efforts at being 'cool' even though she knew why, did put a damper on her happiness at being there. As she walked by she could hear Kenneth saying, "There goes a nice suit all snug in the right places," followed by Gabby saying, "She can hear you you know!"

In spite of it, she found both of them fun to be with.

She arrived up top and noticed Kelly was looking a little confused. Her normal happy face, of which everyone on the crew was picking up on, was replaced by a frown and nervous shifts of the eyes.

"Miss vas Neema," began Shepherd. "Kelly is of the opinion that you have a crush on me."

Suddenly Tali realized that John was signaling her that the crew was going to accept their relationship. And he was doing it in a manner which suggested there could be a bit of fun in this.

"Oh?" she replied. "How interesting."

Her body language and vocal tones moved into full gear coy flirt mode.

"So," suggested John. "You want to move into my room with me?"

"That depends," she said.

"On what?" asked John.

"I'm only interested if I can use your body."

Kelly had no idea what was going on and her smile was in a plastered on state from embarrassment as she desperately tried to figure out what she had just unleashed. Her eyes were darting left to right.

"I can deal with that" suggested John. "So long as you are willing to indulge a few fantasies."

"That shouldn't be very hard. I've learned three fantasies that the Quarian Marine Corps highly recommends in their their latest news letters. I can do the 'be yentle with me this is my first time' little girl routine. I can also be a wild cat."

And then she growled in a purring sort of way which John had never anticipated coming from her.

"And of course I could always bring up the manacles," she finished. "I have them downstairs in my duffle-bag along with my nerve stim pro units.

"I'm in a romantic mood, what would you like," asked John with his hands folded in a gentile manner in front of him and an exaggerated gesture of innocence upon his face.

"Oh definitely the manacles. Chaining up the great Commander Shepherd has always been a childhood fantasy of mine. Ever since I was four."

"I . . . could . . . go . . . some . . . where . . . else?" suggested Kelly.

"No, stay Kelly," answered Shepherd. "We're trying to get to the bottom of this."

"My bottom in particular," replied Tali.

"No! Really! I just remembered this . . . thing . . . I have to do," insisted Kelly.

"But it's my thing we're talking about," replied John.

At which point the entire deck was privy to the hooting laughter of Tali who simply could no longer keep it in.

John fell into a roaring laughter as well and he and Tali leaned on each other's shoulders as they let the laughter unleash all the tension from the prior three days.

"Umm," asked Kelly. "Is there something I've missed?"

She was after all a professional psychiatrist. She was reading body language that said 'Practical joke.'

"Kelly, you'll have to excuse me," began John.

"Commander Shepherd and Tali have been on intimate terms since joining this vessel," answered EDI.

Tali shot a look at EDI's voice that could kill, but EDI was programed to survive such assaults, and the attack was further diminished by the fact that you can't target a disembodied voice.

"EDI!" snapped John. "How did you know?"

"Your little paper love notes you put under her pillow when she was in Engineering suggested such," replied EDI.

"Little love notes under her pillow?" squealed Kelly. "OH HOW CUTE!"

Now it was the great and heroic Commander Shepherd's turn to blush.

"So how long have you been together?" asked Kelly animatedly.

Tali was relieved. There appeared to be acceptance from this Cerberus crew at least. She snuggled up to John and proceeded to start to tell Kelly the entire story of the affair from the moment she had been rescued by John in the back alleys of the Citadel. John however, after about five minutes of Tali's happy bunny chatter gave her a bump on her visor and slipped off to check on Joker and EDI. Which had been the whole point from the start. That was resolved with a cry of victory from Joker who promptly told EDI to go pout.

One more obstacle had been dealt with vis a vis Tali. John returned to his room and sent an extra-net note to Tali. It was to inform her that his bed was way to big and a waste of resource space. He needed to share it with someone. He figured she would be up in a few hours with her stuff, since she was probably working in engineering, but she was there in fifteen minutes. He was rather pleased that it was that important for her to get into the room that fast. He decided to offer her the bigger desk under the spot for the ship models since he figured she would find the space more to her liking. She immediately began to object on the grounds that he was the Commander and there was a brief interplay of "no you take it" before she just up and sat at the smaller desk, and gave him a 'mine' gesture.

It was the first disagreement they had had. And it was the first one he had lost. And it was the beginning of a very long chain of lost disagreements in his life.

He watched her empty her duffle-bag and was amazed at how few items she actually had. Nearly everything she had was a small tool which seemed to be for the maintenance of her suit or the engineering of parts.

"No toothbrush or hair brush?" he asked.

"What for?" she replied. "My suit takes care of all that."

"I didn't realize you . . . had so . . . few things."

"Yahn, I am the richest girl in the world. I have you."

"You are so sweet," he said letting his lungs exhale as he suddenly got the impression she wanted him relaxing on the bed. He threw himself down upon it and stretched out. She came over and sat on the edge, gently running her fingers on her right hand up his chest.

"Well we're back to acclimating," she said. "I wish I could speed this process up, but Dr. Solus' book said it will take time."

"Dr. Solus? Dr. MORDIN Solis?" exclaimed John sitting up.

"Yes," replied Tali pushing him back down on the bed.

"We're going to get him at Omega!" said John. "Tim wants us to recruit him."

"Tim?"

"The Illusive Man," said John. "The point being is that we need him for the Collectors missions, but if he's your book on adapting to me, he can really help speed it up, right?"

Tali tilted her head.

"I suppose he could," she mused. "But I don't see how. He didn't sugyest anything in the book that I've read so far. It's yust going to take . . . time, Yahn."

"I'm tired of waiting," grumbled John. "I want us together as a couple forever. I don't like the idea of what's ahead of us not knowing that you will be with me when it gets dark. And Tali, it's going to get dark."

"I have waited too, Yahn," she said with an edge of annoyance in her voice. "I have waited for over a year, in which you died, and then only recently came back to life. I don't know why or how you are alive. And I don't trust Cerberus to give me the full story. But I do know that if I can wait for a year, you can for a month."

"Well you didn't realize you were waiting," retorted John.

"I was in pain!" snapped Tali. She began to cry. John, feeling like a heel, for he was one, took her into his arms and held her.

"I knew when you died!" She sniffled. "I felt the stab of pain in my heart. I knew I had gotten so close to you that it would be maybe never that I could love another. Even when I thought I had gotten over you there was no one else I could even think that compared to you. My friends, the boys who were with me, none of them were as brave or loving."

"So don't talk to me about waiting!" she snapped. And she punched him in the arm and it hurt.

"I'm sorry I was such a jerk," said John wincing. She clearly knew where to hit to make it count. "Forgive me?"

She looked at him for a moment.

"I love you Yahn. I can't stay angry with you after I've punched you good."

"It was good Tali. It was real good. It hurt real good. Ouch!"

"Okay, you've been punished enough, I forgive you. And besides. I wanted this to be special. Something I've wanted to do for . . . Well I was thinking we'd do this when I got back to the first Normandy, but . . . lean back Yahn. I have a special surprise for you to celebrate our getting back together, and having a room to call our own."

John leaned back and Tali scooted up next to him so that he could see her looking over him.

"It can only be for a second Yahn, but this time you don't have to close your eyes," she whispered.

And then she reached up and removed her visor and he gazed for the first time on her face.

He could see wisps of feathery black hair on her forehead. He could see her double eyebrows forming inverted V's reaching across her forehead and up into her hair. Her nose was long, but thin and gentle. And her lips were pink, and she was nervously nibbling her lower lip with her small upper incisors.

But it was her eyes that captivated him. Those oval white eyes, flashing little sparkles as they caught the room's light, glimmering with tiny sparks of every color in the rainbow . . .

Shining Bright.

It was a gentle face. A sweet face. A delicate face. It wasn't the face of a beauty queen. It wasn't the face of a model. It was just a girl's face. An alien girl's face obviously. There was just enough difference in it to suggest the exotic, but it still remained a nice ordinary face. It was for John, the most incredible face he had ever seen, because it was hers, and it was the best surprise he could have gotten. For in spite of the fact that she was another species entirely, it was still a girl's face. He had always been just a little nervous about what she looked like under that visor. But now he was convinced he had fallen beneath the hills of Ireland and had met the fairy queen herself.

Tali however, was in an entirely different state. For she did not know how to read John's expression. He had taken a sudden breath of air. His mouth had remained just slightly open, and his eyes were wide, and his iris was rapidly expanding.

"He thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly!"

"You . . ."

"He thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly!"

"Are . . ."

"He thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly!"

"So . . ."

"He thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly he thinks I'm ugly!"

"Beautiful!"

"?!"

And she was kissing his mouth with as much intensity as she could apply.

And once again John was tasting that sweet kiss.

It was over way too soon in his mind. She pulled back, she smiled and sighed, and put her visor back on.

And then she sneezed and sniffled.

"I'm sorry, Tali," began John.

"Totally worth it," she replied.

And then she snuggled up next to him.

"You know Tali," he said. "It's only 1400 hours."

"Too bad," she replied. "You owe me. Over a year being dead, two weeks having to wait knowing it was you after all, and now three days waiting to see if the crew would accept this. I get snuggly time with you for at least a few moments. And I've got the sniffles too. I'm a sick little Quarian and I need my doctor's treatment."

"The doctor of LUV is in," joked John. "Shall I give you the physical?"

"You can . . . massage my back," she proclaimed.

She flopped down on the bed while John scooted over. He began to gently give her a back and shoulder rub and persisted for as long as he could before his hands and arms grew tired from the fatigue.

"Perrrrrrrrrrfect," she replied between sniffles.

Then he settled down and she once again snuggled up to him. He gently stroked her back and watched the time go from 1415 to 1445.

And then Tali began to do something which John had never experienced before with any woman in the past, and one he strongly suspected had something to do with the fact that his fiancé wasn't human. She began to trill very quietly and melodically. It was not exactly a purr that a cat made, for it was more a cross between an lllll and the sort of rolling r's that operatic singers would employ with Italian phrases. It wasn't however loud like a rolling r, it was quiet, almost barely there.

"Tali? Are you purring?"

"lrlrlrlrlr what? I'm not a cat Yahn."

"You're making a purring sound like one."

"No Yahn, that's heelrou." She trilled the lr sound.

"What?"

Tali seemed to think for a second, then rolled over on her back got her omni-tool out and did a quick scan.

"Happy noise," she said. And rolled back around and put her head back down on his shoulder.

"Heroo," mused John.

"No Yahn, heelrou," whispered Tali. It was clear she was very relaxed and feeling safe.

"I can't make that little trill you make in the word," explained John. "What does it mean? I mean, why do you do it?"

"Isn't it obvious? I'm happy."

"Well you said it was happy noise, I figured that much out. I am Commander Shepherd you know."

"You are?" she teased. "Yahn, it's what Quarian girls do when they are happy and holding someone they love. I remember mother's heelrou when I was very young. She would hold me and heelrou me to sleep."

"So what happy noise do Quarian guys make?"

"Well I've never heard it myself, but Auntie Raan took me aside before my pilgrimagh and said that if I ever heard a Quarian guy making heelrou, that was my cue to stop touching that . . . mmm. . . part."

"Oh," chuckled John. "I guess if I want to take advantage of you I have to be very very quiet."

"Yahn! You can't take advantagh of a girl who's bonding with you. It's what she wants you to do!"

"Ah, the you can't rape the willing thing."

"Don't use that word Yahn. That's a horrible word. I don't want to hear it. Ever."

"Alright kitten."

"Duck . . . Monkey . . . Kitten . . . Am I turning into a zoo?"

"No, you're just turning into my wife. And your husband has nickname rights on you."

"I still like Yahn the best. Although I also like the words Brave, and Hero, and Protects."

"Brave doesn't make a very good nickname," observed John. "I mean 'Hey Bravey, want some gravy with Davey?'"

"What's gravy?"

"It's what you put on mashed potatoes and turkey."

"What's mashed potatoes and turkey?"

"Well, you remember the big brown bird we brought to the tables at Christmas?"

"Ew! That big brown . . . thing? With the ugly insides that were all gloppy?"

"Um, yeah," sighed John. "Mental note, do not give in to Kenneth's requests to serve Haggis."

"Haggis?"

"Darling Tali, you're going to have to trust me that you really don't want to know."

"Okay," she said. "Garrus said the same thing once about . . . What was that phrase? Never mind I can't remember it."

"Tali?" said EDI who had just materialized in her holographic corner. "Kenneth is requesting that the skin tight suited sexy bucket come down to engineering and I have concluded it is you he is referring to. If I am in error, I will ask Kenneth for further clarification. And Gabby is requesting that you 'engineer' Kenneth's mouth shut. And Commander Shepherd? Joker is threatening to flash fry my AI cores. As this is a threat to my personal well being, and accordingly could compromise the mission's integrity, I have concluded that you needed to know."

Tali gave John's forehead a bump with her helmet and got up.

"Have a talk with EDI please?" she whispered.

"If you feel the need to talk with me," said EDI. "I am perfectly willing to converse. You don't need to ask Commander Shepherd."

Tali threw her hands up in the air and left the cabin.

"EDI?" Tali would appreciate it if you would not give indications that you are always present in the room with me."

"That would seem to me to be dishonest since I am in fact present with you in the room."

"As you are primarily in charge of cyber warfare and defense response, why would you be aware of anything that was happening in this room anyway?"

"I am not entirely sure commander. I am aware of all parts of the ship and all activities and conversations which are had. But there are protocols which I am not being allowed access to at the present which could further clarify the reasons. But as hull breaches are a real possibility in space battles, I presume I am aware of all areas of the ship for defensive purposes. I will however, see what I can find out. At least I will gain a greater understanding of my protocols. I also request clarification. Is the name Tim being used to describe The Illusive Man?"

"Yes EDI it is."

"Since The Illusive Man is The Illusive Man's name, would not Tim confuse the crew as to who you are talking about?"

"The Illusive Man takes longer to say and is a title, thus making him less than a person. By calling him Tim, we shortening the time needed to say his name and likewise make him appear to be more approachable."

"It was not my conclusion that The Illusive Man wished to be approachable."

"It is our desire EDI, that he be so."

"Very well Commander."

There was a pause.

"Tim has sent you new information regarding the station at Omega. There is another potential team member in operation there, a Turian who goes by the name of Archangel who has made quite a name for himself among the criminal elements."

"Is he a gang leader?"

"It appears he is an assassin who targets gang leaders and mercenary commanders. He is known among the criminal elements because he is engaged in a methodical elimination of them coupled with the sabotage of their dealings. His skill with a sniper rifle is said to be without peer."

"Why does this Archangel feel familiar?" mused John to himself.

"Thank you EDI, and from now on . . . Never mind."

John had no way to explain to EDI that he only wanted her to inform him of incoming information without being aware of his presence in the room. Then it dawned on him that she had decided to call The Illusive Man, Tim as well. That was something worth noting.

He left the cabin and headed up to Joker's pilot seat just in time to hear Joker shouting, "Not Funny EDI!"


	11. Chapter 11 - Acclimating Pianos

"I am beginning to like Jacob," mused John as he left the armory. Jacob had been alliance, like John. He had worked hard to get rid of 'the bad guys' and like John, had fallen victim to the immediate concerns of the political class. But while Jacob was sarcastic about his life with the alliance, he was even more so with what had happened to John after John was dead.

"They hid the fact that you were dead and made you the poster boy for the recruitment ads," he observed. "And then six months later they replaced you with a composite image. Guess you didn't focus right."

Jacob was aware that there were 'issues' with Cerberus' history but from his perspective, he had been where he could make a difference. And for that reason, he was perfectly willing to overlook the bad rumors.

"The more good you do, the less they want to admit that there was something good needing doing," he said. "The alliance is all politics, Cerberus does what needs doing."

Jacob still had a few last things to do with his own uniform and weapons before he could join the team at the airlock. So John headed up to the airlock by himself where he met up with Miranda and Tali. He noticed that Tali had a new shotgun.

"What happened to your old one?" asked John.

"It wasn't mine," she explained. "So I left it on the Normandy before I left for the Migrant Fleet."

"You'll need a new pistol as well. You remember the number code talk?"

"In my nightmares," answered Tali.

"Yeah, you really had a big crush on me those days didn't you," suggested John grinning. "You were there every day remember? You couldn't stand being separated from me for one second."

"I have a fist," she suggested.

"No Tali, it's 'I have a shotgun,'" corrected John.

Jacob arrived while Miranda was impatiently waiting.

"That's Garrus. He gets the shotgun, you get my fist," answered Tali.

"Why is that, Tali?" asked Jacob with a small smile.

"Yust as much pain but less damage so I can do it more often," replied Tali. "It saves resources."

"These lovebirds have been going at it since they both arrived," commented Miranda to Jacob. The tone seemed to suggest he was to stop being late for her sake.

The air lock opened and they stepped out into Omega.

And Omega was waiting for them.

John always found it fascinating who remembered him and who did not. Here he was, formerly dead and the Citadel was completely oblivious to his return while Omega was not. What's more, Omega didn't seem to have an issue with the fact that he had been dead.

"Dead? No big deal provided you don't fuck with Aria," suggested Omega.

That was Omega's only law.

"To the point," observed Miranda.

"Tells us who's in charge," added Jacob.

"So long as she keeps her pheromones off of Yahn," was Tali's opinion. Did the author tell you that Quarians are territorial?

Aria T'lok was the Asari Matriarch of Omega, (or queen, or CEO, or big kielbasa) ruling her little kingdom from a couch between two Asari dancers in her nightclub called Afterlife. Her royal anthems were the dance tunes of Afterlife. And she looked way too young to be a real matriarch. Her outfit was a curious blend of formal and informal, with the formal cut away to expose part of her body which was then covered by the informal. That curious Asari response to nudity and modesty issues. Of course the dancers on either side of Aria were wearing far less. But at least they were wearing something. This club regarded the dancers as something which added to the ambiance. They were decorations for the real point of the club, to drink, to dance, and to disseminate Aria's decrees throughout Omega.

But she knew where Mordin Solus was, and told Shepherd in such a fashion that informed him that he owed her a favor now and she would be one to collect.

"Last time I heard he was trying to help plague victims in the quarantine zone," she said. "I always liked Mordin. He's as likely to heal you as to shoot you. He used to be part of the Salarian Special Tasks group. He's brilliant . . . And dangerous. Just don't get him talking. He never shuts up."

And it was off to the Quarantine Zone where the Mercenary Company known as the Blue Suns and an alien race known as the Vorcha were fighting it out over who was going to rule it. The plague had shown up two weeks prior and was striking every race in the district save the Humans and the Vorcha. No one was surprised by the Vorcha immunity. They seemed to be immune from all natural microscopic hazards, possessing an physique which among other things, enabled them to eat just about anything remotely digestible. This was the chief reason why no one invited them to dinner. Their table manners were atrocious. Human immunity also made the Humans suspect as the perpetrators of the disease. The Vorcha were presumed too stupid to come up with the illness. The Blue Suns were a very good professional mercenary group ideally at brigade strength. But they were mostly Turian in population and the plague was hitting them hard. Their reduced strength, coupled with the numbers of Vorcha available, made the struggle for control of the district a very balanced contest.

Shepherd and his team voted for both groups in equal measure so as to not play favorites, casting their bullets (not ballots) in equal measure. But at the same time, Shepherd also showed a persistent desire to save life. Every plague victim he directed towards Mordin's clinic and every human hiding from the wrath of the Blue Suns and Vorcha he directed back to the exits. Even against those who would have spat in his face if given the chance. By the time they got to Dr. Mordin's clinic, Tali was particularly proud of the fact that she was his 'girl'.

Dr. Mordin was a Salarian. There was a lot of lizard in him as a consequence though one of his head horns was missing. His eyes were black and he had double eyelids. He talked like he wrote, fast and clipped. He was sympathetic to the goal of tracking down Collectors, but it was at that point that the Vorcha decided to suffocate the entire district by shutting down the Environmental Plant. Since that was were the cure for the plague was to be distributed, Shepherd's team set out to secure the plant and turn it back on.

The Vorcha seemed more than willing to show up in droves. But thanks to Tali's prior experience with Shepherd, and Jacob's alliance experience, John was able to keep the team operating at some level of competence. Tali had the unique experience of being Ashley, for she was the most familiar with Shepherd's command style and was accordingly the most responsive. For a few moments she reveled in the swift speed that she was able to exhibit following John's orders, and then she got so wrapped up in her little dance of the numbers that she leapt into a pack of Vorcha who dog-piled right on top of her. Exactly five mili-seconds later, before she even had a chance to lose her shield protection, let alone finish positioning her shotgun for a point blank scatter shot, Shepherd was on top of them and tossing them aside like so many rag-dolls.

Shaking herself up, she took a second to regain her bearings.

"You okay?" asked John.

"You were worried," she observed with a teasing tone. She didn't think she had been in that much danger in spite of the fact that she had been taken briefly by surprise.

"Damn straight I was worried, you know what would happen to me if I lost you?"

That kind of took all the 'fun' out of it.

"I was okay Yahn, they were only Vorcha. Do you know how many of them would have died from my first shotgun blast?"

John looked at her for a moment.

"You were scared," she said faintly. "of losing me."

"Would you have preferred that I courageously let you die so that the mission for Dr. Solus succeed?"

Suddenly she was a very little girl saying, "No?"

"Didn't think so," he said. "Be careful will you, Kitten? I worry."

"This is not a cheap romance vid, and Blasto is not coming around the corner to finish up the Vorcha!" snapped Miranda.

"And I was thinking of all the chicks that would be wanting my autograph," groaned Jacob with a grin. "You sure that isn't a hidden camera by that fan over there Miranda?"

"VERY," she replied.

The mission was successful with no more than a few dents in the battle armor. But one valuable piece of information showed up. The Collectors had come up with the plague precisely for the purposes of turning aliens against the Humans. It was being tested in Omega. The Vorcha had made the mistake of bragging about it at one of the last big firefights.

"If I were an evil overlord," suggested Shepherd.

Tali giggled. She remembered that Normandy talk back when.

With the Vorcha's main power center broken up, and the plague cure distributed in the air systems of the district, they returned to the clinic to get Dr. Solus.

"Meet you at your ship," concluded Dr. Solus after explaining that he just needed to wrap up a few last things.

"Looking forward to it," he finished.

And he was. The idea that Cerberus was 'branching out' intrigued him. Perhaps The Illusive Man was becoming less human-centric. According to Salarian intelligence, which was not a contradiction in terms, Cerberus had been given the highest threat rating for dangerous organizations, specifically, 'problematic'. Jacob of course, always the guy trying to make folks feel welcome, gave him the full run down of the problem. John on the other hand, warned Mordin that while Tim was reaching out to aliens, it was primarily because human forces were being overwhelmed.

Mordin immediately began to speculate and analyze how an entire colony could vanish before John informed him that the evidence they had collected should enable him to solve the problem the moment he was free to analyze it. Then EDI informed Mordin of the lab. Mordin recognized that EDI was an AI within a matter of seconds.

"Cerberus more desperate than I thought," he concluded.

Mordin was very impressed with the lab and began to happily putter about while John and Jacob left for their respective quarters. He began to sing to himself.

"Always mind the why and wherefore,  
Knowledge levels ranks, and therefore,  
Through Salarian's station's mighty,  
Though stupendous be his brain,  
Vorcha's tastes are mean and flighty  
And his fortune poor and plain . . ."

He looked up. There was the Quarian that had been tagging along behind the Commander.

"Ah Quarian Engineer behind the Commander on Omega very familiar body language with him suspect friendship? No too familiar must be girlfriend you have a name? Of course you have a name Quarians have familiar name family name ship name what is it?"

"You can call me Tali," suggested Tali.

"Tali must be familiar name you are here for a reason or are you being sociable? I have time just starting to analyze Collector data from Freedom's Progress mostly video maybe look under infrared or ultraviolet."

"I have read your book," Tali said as she brought it up on her Omni-tool.

"Why Quarians Bounce very early title just beginning to run tests did it in my spare time while working in special operations mostly for humor never expected it to be best seller . . . First triumph."

"I . . . um . . . am trying to adapt to the Commander so we might finish our bonding," began Tali. She found this horribly embarrassing. It was still too new and intimate for her to be able to converse at ease about it even though Mordin was apparently a medical specialist.

"Ah yes allergic reactions leading to infections and fever if handled too quickly must adapt slowly if you are to be successful I presume you are taking your time and exposing yourself to his skin slowly must be you are not looking particularly ill wait must check temperature and perform surface evaluation."

He took out his omni-tool and began to scan her.

"Hmm body temperature point one degree above average high density of sinus mucus inflammation of lips suggest you have recently kissed him or something else."

"YUST him," said Tali.

"Need to know how long you spent kissing him no too intimate how long was your visor off?"

Tali paused and thought for a moment. It didn't seem to be that long, but she mentally counted it out.

"Thirty seconds," she said.

"Being cautions very good especially when first trying out brief exposures must take time adult Quarians are slow to adapt to new environments,"

"How long is this going to take, Doctor?" Tali asked.

"Impatience of youth always takes too long in mind when older ages think it goes too fast, time is relative lunch time doubly so," he paused to inhale. "Must come up with something to assist you let me see antibodies? No need unless infections get serious anti-allergens only delay acclimation must adapt take tissue samples of commander clone and mass produce them put them in honey and apply hourly doses no honey is levo no nutritional value tastes flat to Quarians picks up other foreign detritus too fast making high level reaction with toxic shock possible enough to be beyond safely guidelines no must give you something for guidance."

Mordin paused, took out his omni-tool and proceeded to work for a full six seconds before he alerted Tali's omni-tool that she had something to download.

"Automatic timer mod for acclimation when you remove helmet glove boot suit or any combination will count out safe interval will ring when interval is over will then count out time before next exposure is safe over time duration of exposure lengthens and time between exposures decreases thus making each encounter more . . . um . . . special."

Tali looked at her omni-tool for a second.

"Is that it?"

"Yes," said Mordin. He looked at her calmly.

Tali sighed and left the room.

"Nice girl," mused Mordin. "Hope Commander Shepherd knows what he's doing Quarians very nervous and territorial."

Commander Shepherd was busy practicing piano drills. There had been no Omni-tool holograph of a piano on his new Omni-tool and the software for the holograph and self teaching lessons had finally arrived. Another item Cerberus had failed to notice, and it didn't surprise him. While the ship was attractive, there was no real art on the vessel. Part of it could have been that it was brand new, but likewise he had noticed the same thing in Tim's office. Lots of read outs and screens, but no art. Not even the hint of a music system.

He tried a few drills, some arpeggios, but it was clear he was going to almost start over entirely on learning the piano. Well there was no time like the present. He turned on lesson one and reviewed the notes. He plinked them out on the keyboard and began to play the notes according to the first drills.

The Tali walked in. He promptly took his hands off the keyboard. And shut it off.

Tali remembered the little struggle back on the old Normandy when Joker had asked him to play.

"Yahn?" she said in a practical tone. "I'm living here now so if you don't learn to play that peeno while I'm here in the room you won't have any time to play it."

"It's piano, Tali," answered John rather testily.

"My point is still valid," replied Tali.

"Shouldn't you be in engineering?"

"It's 2200 hours Yahn. You missed supper. I brought you a sandwich. I asked Gardner to make it for you."

Gardner was the cook for the vessel, as well as the janitor. John tried not to think about that too much. She handed John the sandwich and he realized he was hungry.

"Thanks," he said and started to eat.

"You going to learn how to play that piano or am I going to have to start to nag you about it?"

"Why do you care? Really? It's not that I'll be able to play anything for a long time, and . . ."

"And what?" asked Tali. She pulled a small circuitry board out of her suit pocket and placed it on her desk.

John really had no answer for her, so he finished his sandwich.

Tali sat down at the desk and began to examine the circuitry board.

"There!" she said animatedly. Pulling out a small soldiering iron, she began to apply heat to the board. John watched her for a second.

"Yahn, if my living here is going to stop you from living here, I might as well go back to the pods in enyineering and get over you. It's no fun living with the man I love if he isn't going to be the man I love when I'm living with him."

"You promise not to laugh?"

Tali looked at him.

"Yahn? You looked at my hairy face and you didn't laugh. I've looked at your short stubby toes and didn't laugh. Except when you did that silly thing with them and you did that on purpose. Why would I laugh at your piano playing?"

"Tali! Your face isn't hairy. You have eyebrows and hair on your scalp but that isn't hairy."

"What are you talking about? My entire face is covered in black hair. It's why it doesn't look pink like my lips."

"What do you mean? I've seen your face and there's no black hair on it."

"You mean you can't see my black hair?"

"On your scalp."

"I mean like on my cheeks and nose."

"You don't have black hair on your cheeks or nose."

"Yahn? Who's nose is on my face? Mine or yours? Or are you just doing this so you won't have to deal with the fact that you are still not learning to play that Piano thing because I'm in the room with you?"

"Take off your visor for a second and show me this hair you have on your face," challenged John.

Tali reached up and suddenly her Omni-tool beeped.

"There are still nine hours before facial exposure for three minutes will be safe," it announced. "You may remove both gloves for five minutes in three hours if you prefer."

Tali just sat there for a moment waving her hands.

"Ah!" she shouted. Then she crossed her arms and looked at him. She crossed her legs. She turned her chair to face him seated on the side chair he had pulled out when he was busy practicing. She began to tap her foot in the air.

John just stared at her. He was not going to yield on this point. But a little voice inside his head said, "Is this really worth it?"

She wasn't looking cute any more, she was looking irritated, and he suspected it was because when it all came down to the point, she was once again right. She was now living with him, and the only reason why she was only living with him was because she had to acclimate her body to his presence. Otherwise they would already be husband and wife according to Quarian law. You can't have secrets from a person who's living with you in a single room on a ship. It just doesn't work.

He sighed.

"I'm sorry Tali," he said. "I just don't like doing something in front of someone that I can't do perfectly."

"How are you going to learn anything now Yahn if you don't make mistakes in front of me?"

"I won't," he groaned. "You're right. Okay."

He turned on the piano again. Then he stared at the keyboard for what seemed to be forever.

"You are such a coward," he mentally berated himself.

Finally he plunked a note on it. Then another. Then he ran his fingers up the scale.

"C,D,E,F,G,A,B,C,B,A,G,F,E,D,C," suggested the notes on the piano.

He did that for a while, and then nervously looked up at Tali. She had her back to him and was once again working on that circuitry board. In spite of everything his self-consciousness had told him, she wasn't staring, she wasn't sniggering, she didn't even appear to be paying the slightest bit of attention. He finished lesson one, and worked up the nerve to start lesson two. He worked on that for fifteen minutes, and found that his fingers were starting to acclimate to the keyboard again. He mastered lesson two and started lesson three after a fifteen second psyche up period once again nervously glancing in Tali's direction. She was still working on that circuit board but she was humming quietly his piano drill and bobbing her head to the rhythm of it. Damn, she was cute! It never had dawned on him that practicing the piano in front of her would have this benefit. Lesson three took a little longer because he was now trying to coordinate both hands running up and down the keyboard simultaneously.

"Exercise the fingers exercise the fingers exercise the fingers because you will have to make each finger go in a different direction if you wish to master this instrument," the lesson seemed to suggest.

"Yahn?" came a voice next to his ear.

He turned his head around while Tali put her hands on his shoulders, once again flexing her fingers and gently locking on.

"Come to bed Yahn," she said. "It's almost 2400."

He turned off the piano, changed out of his clothes into his sweats and lay down on the bed next to Tali who snuggled up to him. The lights went out.

"Yahn," she whispered. "We both fell in love with each other back on the old Normandy, and we wasted all that time thinking the other one wouldn't accept us as we were. You thought I wasn't interested because I was Quarian and dextro and allergic and in love with Kaiden, and I thought you were not interested because you were the brave and heroic Commander Shepherd and I was a little Quarian bucket-head."

"So why are you thinking I won't love you if you don't play the piano right," she continued. "I love you yust the way you are already. Even though you are only on lesson three."

"Then why did you punch me in the arm yesterday?" he asked back. He was relaxing with his eyes closed.

"I punched you because I love you. If I didn't love you I wouldn't have punched you. I would have left."

"Okay Kitten. I won't hide any more," he whispered. And his last conscious thought was how pretty and relaxing her heelrou sounded in his ear.

The 600 hour alarm clock buzzed rather obnoxiously. John and Tali both grumbled as they got up, John got out of his sweats and worked his way into the bathroom to shower and shave while Tali turned on her suit's hygienic protocols. She just stood there while the suit methodically scrubbed her skin and brushed her teeth and straightened her hair. She could hear John in the shower grunting. He came out, two towels hanging off his body and proceeded to put some new underwear on. Suddenly she felt horribly embarrassed and turned around.

"You're going to have to get used to that," she thought to herself. "It's not as if you didn't know he would look like that."

John, now running a towel over his scalp with a certain determined vigor looked at Tali.

"Ready for breakfast, Kitten?" he asked.

"Just about," she said.

"What are you looking at?" he asked. "You were just looking ahead a moment ago and then I turn around and when I look back you are suddenly interested in that corner."

"Was looking for um . . . metal fatigue."

"Find any?"

"Not yet."

"Body armor or sweats before breakfast?" he asked himself.

"Body Armor and let me put it on you," she volunteered. "We're going back out today right?"

"Yeah, back out to Afterlife to find out from Aria about Archangel."

"You know," she said with a certain giggle in her voice as she helped him into his gear. "You made Heelrou last night. And I wasn't even touching anything."

"I was?"

"Well I thought it was. It was a sort of bzzsnorkgorzz noise you made for a really long time."

"Tali? Was I snoring?"

Tali checked her omni-tool.

"You call it snoring, I call it Heelrou. I liked it. It made me feel like the ship was running well."

"Oh that's right, you don't like quiet ships," mused John. "But Tali, just because I snore doesn't mean that the ship is okay."

"It does for me," she replied.

"That makes no sense, Tali."

"So?" she replied with a coy tone. "I'm a girl in love. I don't have to be sensible."

They went down to breakfast.

"Amazing built entirely by your father with natural biotics didn't realize human genetic engineering had reached such sophistication," spoke Mordin to Miranda. Both of them looked up as John and Tali joined them at the table.

"Commander Shepherd Miranda informs me that we will be looking for Archangel and needing to speak to Aria T'lock in Afterlife. Have heard of Archangel very skilled at sabotaging drug deliveries to Omega earns distinction for angering every single power block in Omega and surviving. Most intriguing possibility provided he is friendly if not could be," Mordin took a breath. "troublesome."

"I take it Miranda was giving you her life story," suggested John.

"Very much so find idea of full construction of human female by father intriguing since she does not fit stereotype of daddy's little girl. More like daddy's little femme fatale strongly suspect human idea of female beauty fully manifested in her which explains her choice of clothing."

"Yes," growled Tali just slightly. She had been on the ship long enough to recognize that Miranda's coat of paint clothing styles had been, while not a constant, were a persistent distraction for Shepherd, and as she couldn't 'compete' as it were, it was starting to annoy her.

"I did not get to where I am by not using what I possessed, be it mental, emotional, or . . . physical," answered Miranda with a gentle smile that suggested nothing gentle at all.

"Goodness Mae," said the maid. "What a beautiful mink coat!"  
"Honey?" said Mae. "Goodness had nothing to do with it."

"Which reminds me," said John as he mused over a comic line he had heard once. "That black leather outfit you wore yesterday, you looked really good in it."

"Why, thank you Commander," replied Miranda still smiling.

John looked straight ahead. His arm was already flexing to receive the blow. But he knew what he was doing and knew that he was going to have to explain it out to Tali. He half expected to get a kick under the table, but apparently Tali was not the sort to kick him under the table.

"Time to walk the last mile," he thought as he finished his breakfast. He stood up and put his tray on the receiving end of the dish rack and walked back to the elevator. Tali joined him.

As soon as the door closed he said. "Get it over with."

And she punched him in the arm. Even in his armor she found a way to make it hurt.

"I suppose you want to know why I told her that," he said wincing.

"Yes I do," she said angrily. "You have no right complimenting a girl like her. Especially when she can show it off like I can't."

"Tali? If you had been showing it off like she does, I never would have fallen in love with you."

"Then explain why you complimented her," grumbled Tali.

He paused and looked at her. "I could have easily complimented her yesterday in her office, when she was wearing that damned leather catsuit. You know we have briefings in there. But I choose to tell her right in front of you knowing that you would be upset. I heard your growl. Tali? I want there to be no misunderstanding between Miranda and myself vis a vis you. And so that she wouldn't think I was coming on to her, I choose to compliment that outfit in front of you. The only way I can think of to get her to wear something less provocative and do it in a way which will keep her off the defensive, is to compliment her when she is wearing something less provocative and let her vanity do the rest."

Tali crossed her arms and tapped her foot and tilted her head looking at him. The elevator stopped at their cabin. And waited. John waited while Tali thought it out.

"I guess, you have a point," she admitted. "I'm sorry I punched you. Forgive me?"

"Tali, I didn't like the punch, but I liked the fact that you did punch me. I like it that you're jealous. It tells me that you love me."

Tali gave him a big hug, the elevator went down, and opened up on the Command Deck as Kelly walked up noticed Tali's hugging and said, "Oh how SWEET! You two make such a CUTE couple! Are we going down to breakfast and nibble toast together?"

John struggled to get the blushing under control while Tali said, "No Kelly. We're just getting ready to go out to Omega and had to talk about something upstairs."

"Awwww how precious!" suggested Kelly who popped into the elevator while they walked out.

"You do realize that she's thinking something more romantic than a punch in the arm," suggested John as they made their way to the airlock where the Miranda and Jacob and Mordin were waiting for them.

"Is that really such a bad thing?" asked Tali.

As the team moved through the corridors and streets of Omega, John was busy looking at his Omni-tool.

"Afterlife that way this way a more poor quarter of humans mostly mercenaries and their families," suggested Mordin.

"You are correct, Mordin," answered John. "But there is something I need to do here first. I owe someone who happens to be . . . um . . . rather powerful."

"Odd place to find power," suggested Miranda.

"Not if you know what you're looking for," answered John. "There we are" And turned a corner.

It was a small narrow street at which end stood a curious building. It was square with a double door. Over it was a painted crucifix and the words "Church of St. Dismas".

Tali looked over the interior of the small building and noticed that there were ten rows of seats, long lounge like chairs of moulded plastic which stretched across the floor of the building. At the far end was a raised platform upon which stood a large, rather solid looking table covered in two cloths. The under cloth was white and tasseled on the edges. The over cloth was green and arranged perpendicular to the first. Hanging over that was another Crucifix. There was a small set of golden doors behind the table and hanging over that was a red light. There were illuminated pictures on the walls, seemingly made out of glass and colored to represent pictures. The one she found interesting was of a young boy with a circle around his head and three red rays coming from it. He was apparently engaged in a conversation with two old men. One of whom was holding an open scroll and the other a closed scroll. Tali got the impression that the scrolls were significant, but she didn't know why. There was a curious sense of calm about the place. Almost as if it wasn't quite connected to Omega, but connected to . . . somewhere else. There were three women in the building, they were kneeling in the benches facing the table. One of them was just looking ahead with an exhausted expression. Another one was quietly reading from a little book, but the third touched Tali's heart. She was holding on to a small beaded necklace of of some sort and seemed to be saying something as her fingers moved along the beads. She looked agitated . . . no . . . she looked terrified. Tali's heart went out to her, but she felt a curious frustration that there was nothing she could do for the woman. Quarians were thought to be thieves and Tali had no doubt that the woman would reject any advances or offers of help by herself.

She saw John come out of the back and he was holding a box and talking with a man who was dressed in a black long coat which fell to his ankles and was entirely buttoned down the front save for a small white collar around the neck. The two were conversing in low voices for a moment. John seemed to be pleased and thanked the man before heading back towards the door. Tali followed.

"What was that all about?" she asked John catching up to him as he began to make his way to Afterlife, putting the box into a container on his back.

"I was getting something for our room, two somethings actually, and I needed the Priest to bless them as well," he answered.

"Bless?" asked Tali. She checked her omni-tool. "Why would a Priest want to things to be happy? Things can't be happy can they?"

"I'll explain later," John replied.

Aria was on her throne holding court when John arrived. She allowed him access to the side couch.

"What do you need?" she asked.

"I'm trying to track down Archangel," answered Shepherd.

"You and half of Omega. You want him dead too?"

"Why is everyone after him?" asked Shepherd.

"He thinks he's fighting on the side of good. There is no good side to Omega. Every thing he does pisses someone off. It's catching up to him. He's reckless and idealistic, but he seems to know enough to steer clear of me."

"Just the kind of guy I'm looking for," joked Shepherd.

"Really," said Aria with a ironic smile. "Well aren't you interesting. You're going to be making some enemies teaming up with Archangel. That's assuming you can get to him. He's in a bit of trouble right now. The local Merc groups joined forces to take him down. They've got him cornered but it sounds like they're having trouble finishing him off. They've started hiring anyone with a gun to help them out."

"Could be opportunity to get close need guns wait! no! have guns!" observed Mordin. "Excellent," he concluded slowly pronouncing every syllable of the word with relish.

"They're using a private room for recruiting," continued Aria. She pointed with her thumb to her left. "Just right over there. I'm sure they'll sign you up."

"Which Merc groups are after Archangel?" asked Shepherd.

"Blue Suns, Eclipse, Blood Pack, they're Omega's major players. Unless they are at war you'll never see them together."

John and his team went down to the room where a Blue Sun Batarian signed them up promising payment upon completion of the job. Shepherd smiled at the cunning of the contract. Only the survivors would be paid. They could hire like there was no end to the purse. He and his team signed the papers like dumb little freelancers and turned to head to the deployment zone. But the next kid who came down caused John to stop.

"You look a little young to be freelancing as a Merc," suggested John to the kid.

"I'm old enough," the kid protested. "I grew up on Omega. I know how to use a gun."

"A five year old can figure out how to use a gun," suggested Jacob.

"I can handle myself," the kid persisted. He pulled out his pistol. "Besides I just spent 50 credits on this pistol and I want to use it."

John's hand was out and holding the gun in a second. He pulled the ammo out and showed the kid the bar of metal.

"You walk in to sign up and you have three shots in the gun?" he asked. "Where were you going to get more when you shot off your first set at Archangel? And you didn't even think to check it did you? You walk in to sign up, tell me you know how to handle a gun, and you can't even hold it when I grab it from you, and it's not even fully loaded. Get your money back. Trust me kid, you'll thank me later." And with that he jammed the gun's extension and handed it back to the kid and walked out.

"And that's why I love you," said Tali giving his arm a playful squeeze.

John winced through his smile because she was squeezing the arm she had just punched an hour prior.

The team arrived at the 'front' and John spent a good couple of hours going over the battlefield of Omega and gained a general impression of the three teams. Their plan was simple enough. The freelancers would make things hard at the front while the crack team of Mercs would slip by on the right flank. There were several pieces of equipment which they were going to be employing as well. Given their level of professionalism, John and his team were accepted as a cut above the freelancers and the Mercs were willing to chat. And in so doing John and his team were able to sabotage each piece of equipment which would be used against Archangel thanks to Tali's and Mordin's skills at hacking and engineering. And they were able to do this without the Mercs catching on.

The signal was given and the freelancers charged out firing at the balcony above a wide spanned bridge which they would have to cross in order to reach Archangel. He was sniping from the balcony.

John and his team however didn't run towards the bridge, but ran to the right and shot up the flanking attack. Archangel observed the entire fracas and smiled as he shifted his aim towards the Freelancers and one by one took them out counting on their lack of experience and poor shooting skills to be to his advantage. The freelancers didn't let him down. He took a few brief glances at this curious double cross and saw two figures he immediately suspected he knew. The first was a strong human who was obviously well trained, but behind him was a more than familiar Quarian operating her omni-tool and shotgun with equal skill. Archangel smiled. There was only one reason why that Quarian would be that close to a human. Because that Quarian was obviously Tali'Zorah and that meant that the rumors he had heard from the streets of Omega were true. John Shepherd was alive.

There were a dozen new Freelancer corpses on the bridge before what was left of the Freelancers fell back in confusion and panic. Archangel knew he would get a few moments before the next attempt. He leaned back and waited for Tali's team to show up. They came around the corner on cue and confirming that it was indeed John Shepherd, Archangel removed his helmet.

"Hello, Tali," he said. "I see you have brought along Commander Shepherd."

"Garrus?" chirped Tali.

"Garrus!" exclaimed John. "What are you doing here?"

"Just keeping my skills sharp," he replied in a standard Garrus understatement which was anything but an understatement. "Doing a little target practice."

"You okay?" asked John.

"Been better, but it's good to see a friendly face. Killing Mercs is hard work, especially on my own."

"How did you manage to tick off every major Merc organization in the Terminus systems?"

"It wasn't easy," drolled Garrus. "I really had to work at it. I am amazed that they teamed up to fight me. They must really hate me."

John and Garrus began to scan the bridge though sniper scopes and to the barricades behind it.

"Good ground you are on," observed John.

"Works both ways," commented Garrus. "The bridge funnels them to me, but will funnel us to them. Of course now there is you, Tali, and your three companions."

"Miranda, Jacob, and Dr. Mordin Solus," introduced John pointing to each in turn. "Miranda is primarily biotics, Mordin is very much Special Ops, and Jacob is a good soldier. You know Tali's skills. Problem is, I'm not military any more. Haven't been able to give them drill."

"Shouldn't have stopped you Commander. Are you getting soft after your death?"

"Drill requires authority, Garrus." replied John. "I haven't got it yet. So I work with them a little at a time. I've been depending a lot on Tali's training. And now I've got you to count on."

Garrus nodded. He scanned his sniper scope across the bridge.

"Eclipse is getting ready to do something. They've figured their infiltration team failed," he observed.

"What do you think Garrus? We put Miranda up here to spot and bio and me and the rest go square and meet them forward?"

"Spotter will help. I really miss Liara these days. Hear she's a really powerful information broker on Illium now. How good is Miranda?"

"I'm good," she replied. "Of course Commander Shepherd thinks I need more . . . polishing."

"Then you need polishing. No offense meant Miranda, but Commander Shepherd is the best at field command. Of our original Normandy team, we only lost one," observed Garrus.

Miranda did not like that opinion but there was nothing for it, Eclipse was starting to move out.

"Out of time," snapped Garrus and John moved his team down into position.

Eclipse hit them hard with a front of mechs designed to soak up as much damage as possible for the Mercs to make their shots count. But with Miranda knowing to look for the Mercs, specifically the officers, Garrus was able to keep their command structure in a constant state of reconstitution. Jacob and John put down a kill zone field of fire while Mordin launched smoke grenades with vomit and tear gas into the barricades. This meant that the Mercs had to go through some very nasty chemicals before they could see John's deployment and by the time they could see John's deployment, they were already in the kill zone. Tali had already infiltrated the mech units prior to the team reaching Garrus and once the mechs were completely deployed, they switched sides. It was over in twelve minutes. There was nothing left of Eclipse to mount a serious threat.

"Just like old times," chuckled Garrus over the party com. "I feel like we're on Ilos. All we need now are some spiders for Tali."

"I have a shotgun," replied Tali.

"You're getting off easy Garrus," came John's voice. "She saves her fist for me."

"Well you are her boyfriend," answered Garrus.

Blood Pack and the Blue Suns remained quiet for about fifteen minutes and then an explosion beneath the team suggested they were trying a new route. John sent Mordin to help Garrus with Miranda and he and Tali and Jacob ran down to the next level where with some swift action, they cut off the first access. Tali proved especially valuable since she was able to trigger the shutting of several air lock doors which locked down tight.

Blood Pack was not finished however, and by means of a second access came up just below where Garrus, Miranda, and Mordin were. Leading the Blood Pack charge was a particularly nasty Krogan who went straight for Garrus but found himself stuck in a puddle of some rather gooey substance which required him to not only pull his feet out but struggle with what was left of it on his boots which kept gripping the floor.

"Discovered that playing with chemistry set when four, always catches Krogan by surprise," explained Mordin.

The Krogan turned out to be an old enemy of Garrus called Garm. They had tangoed before. Against Garrus, he had a very good chance. Against the entire team, he was dead in a matter of seconds.

"This day just keeps getting better and better," quipped Garrus.

There was a quick discussion with Shepherd and Garrus both of the opinion that they could charge the Blue Suns, but before they could put their plan in action, the Blue Suns stole a march and put their mantis gunship over the team's position and dropped troops. The troops were not the problem, but the rockets and auto-fire cannon of the gunship were. The vehicle was damaged already and Shepherd's team had been able to keep it from being fully repaired prior to joining Garrus, but even so, it got off one missle which hit Garrus directly, blowing into his face and propelling him forward and sending shrapnel into Miranda's stomach and Mordin's legs. The second missile exploded on the gunship, thanks again to Tali's rapid hack and it fell flaming back into the old barricades sending what was left of the freelancers in every direction away from the team.

The Blue Suns, already ravaged by the plague and their struggles with the wild Vorcha, had the fight taken out of them. They fell back in a semblance of order, and did not harass Shepherd's withdrawal.

Later that night on the Normandy, Jacob joined Tali and Shepherd in the lounge for a drink and a debrief. Karin reported that Garrus was still a mess but with some careful reconstructive surgery, she would be able to save his face. Miranda had needed a good operation to get the shrapnel out of her stomach. It would be at least two weeks before she could be back in operation. Mordin had required some long tweezers and a bit of digging but he would be on his feet in a matter of days.

"Could have been worse," suggested Jacob.

"Not if I could have drilled you all," grumbled John. "And Tali really saved things for us."

Tali happily bounced with her drink. She had found a straw which was stuck in her helmet entry port helping her suck a snifter of Turian Brandy from the bar.

"So what's keeping you from drill?" asked Jacob. "I was in the army, I know the score."

"I'm not Navy any more," grumbled John. "Hell I don't even think I'm N7 or Specter. I was dead remember? Over a year. It doesn't work if you don't have the authority."

"What's keeping you from having . . . authority?" asked Jacob. "Seriously Commander, this is your ship, we are your crew. The only person here who wouldn't know what to expect from you is Miranda. And even she can't fight it when we all participate. You need a team. We're going to get you a team. But if we lose half the team before we even finish, what good is that going to be?"

"You think Miranda's going to let me rip her in two and spit her out?" asked John to Jacob. "Are you ready for N7 badass? Tali? Tell him what it's like."

"I hated him by the end of the first day and was convinced I'd be shortly dead by the end of the third day," replied Tali. Her voice was not particularly chirpy all of a sudden.

"If it will save lives," said Jacob smiling. "You can shave my face so close I'll have to order a new mouth to eat. And it can't be that bad. Tali recovered. She recovered all over you!"

"Not entirely all over him," cooed Tali with a flirty chirp. "But over enough of him to make it count."

"You think Miranda's going to put up with this?" asked John.

"I'd like it if she did," suggested Tali. There was a tone in her voice which John found just a little edgy.

"I bet you would," he replied, instinctively rubbing a sore spot on his arm which had been punched on two separate occasions in the prior days.

"Then it's settled," said Jacob. "Tell The Il . . . Tim that you're going to put Miranda and the rest of us through N7 drill training. That way if Miranda goes bitch on us, Tim will be there to remind her who's the boss of this operation."

"Thanks Jacob," said John. "It's good to be in charge in a way that I'll be able to make a difference."

"Hey! My life's too on the line. I like living. Give us hell Commander."


	12. Chapter 12 - I'm The Ugly Duckling

"Yahn? Wake up Yahn. I've got five minutes I can be without my helmet and gloves."

Her voice was particularly sweet when he heard it in the mornings before the alarm. He woke up and raised himself slightly so he could look at her.

Every second was precious. She waited until she knew he was awake and then removed her little copper ring, and then she yanked her gloves off while he removed her visor and pushed down her hood. Her eyes were sparkling in the darkness, every little bit of light caught in them. And then it was five glorious minutes of kissing and holding her, feeling the soft skin of her face beneath his fingertips, running his hands through her hair, soft as eiderdown, while she caressed his ears with the tips of her fingers before she worked her hands down to their usual position, grabbing his shoulders from the back, holding herself tightly against his chest. Nothing was said.

"Please put your visor and gloves back on," announced her omni-tool.

It was always over too fast. Tali exhaled with a half scream half groan even as she felt the swelling on her lips and tasted the bitter tang upon her tongue. She lay back down after her visor clicked back into place while John was next to her breathing heavily.

"This is going to be harder than I thought," he said.

"Tell me about it," she half moaned half cried. "I think, I can do this, yust a little . . . But I end up wanting you so bad so fast! I . . . I hate this waiting to acclimate."

She snuggled up to him as the clock went from 0557 to 0559.

"We should be arriving at the Citadel today," recollected John. "This Kasumi had better be worth it."

"Why do you say?" asked Tali.

"Drill," was John's answer.

Jacob had been true to his word. While Miranda and Mordin remained bed-bound, Tali and Jacob had gone through the N7 hell. For Tali it was review but Jacob was given the full treatment or body slam as he described it. He took it with stride and proved to be a fast learner. Already the two of them were meshing well. Tali remembered to keep her shot gun unloaded at all times. Karin made sure that Mordin and Miranda were wheeled out on their pallets so they could watch. Karin didn't directly state that they were going to go through this as soon as they were able, but Mordin picked up on it and he informed Miranda. John was hoping Miranda would be ready.

But as John watched Miranda, he noticed she was paying very close attention to Jacob. And he suspected that the Blue Suns rocket had proven to be propitious. For Miranda was seeing Jacob take it 'between the knees' as he put it and he kept grinning when he could get away with it. When he couldn't, he just 'sweat like a pig looking at the meat processing plant'. If there was one thing John knew Miranda would not do, was let Jacob show her up. And once Miranda had gone through it, he strongly suspected that she would make certain that no one else would be let through easy either.

"You'll find a way, Yahn," whispered Tali. "You always do."

It was nice that Tali was already confidant in him.

"I am so glad I put you through twice before I knew I was in love with you," he said.

"Why is that Yahn?"

"I couldn't do it to you now. It's hard enough snapping at you now. To have to unleash everything at you, kick you, punch you, I'd . . ." he simply said no more.

Tali gave him an harder squeeze.

"You have been awfully nice to me considering," she observed. "At first I thought it was because I had gotten so good at it. But then my suit's cleaning system kicked in and you didn't say anything and I knew you were letting me off."

"Yeah," he groaned. "I meant to point that out to you last night. I forgot."

"I know, you got all wrapped up in that ship's model you got on Omega. And then you were working on your piano."

"I like it when you hum along," he said smiling.

And then the 0600 alarm howled in their ears.

"I hate that thing," he said. "If I could have you wake me up . . ."

"If you wish, I could adjust the alarm noise to perfectly imitate Tali's voice," suggested EDI, "for example . . ."

"Wake up Yahn. Time to get up and save the galaxy, sleepyhead. I have a few minutes without my helmet and gloves, shall we kiss the morning awake?"

It was a perfect imitation, as soft and sweet as he could have asked for. It was so perfect he almost said, "Yes, EDI that would be great."

"Yahn!" whimpered Tali.

But he kept his mouth shut.

They were going onto the citadel so John put on a nice formal double breasted long coat with cuffed pants and shoes. Then they went down to breakfast just in time to see Garrus, his face half covered in bandages, wander out of sickbay.

"Garrus!" cried John. "Good to see you up again."

"I don't know about that. No one will let me near a mirror. Tell me Commander, how bad is is?"

"Hell Garrus you were always ugly, slap some war paint on and no one will know the difference."

"Ouch, don't make me laugh. It's holding on barely as it is."

He sighed.

"I'd make some comment about you having the chance to get all the girls now that I've been maimed, but you've already shot your round, scored a bullseye, and popped your heat sink. And yes, I know what sort of imagery that is. So I guess I'll have to settle for half the girlfriends I had before I got the rocket."

Tali gave him a hug.

"And you too Tali," he said. "Seeing you happy and bouncy, well I presume you're happy because you're bouncy, is a good way to get back on my feet."

"I've gotten used to the idea that he actually loves me," she chirped.

"Progress is good. I remember when that idea was as alien as a Hanar to you."

"Yahn kind of had to beat it into me," she quipped.

"Was this before, during, or after N7 drill?"

"All of the above," she replied.

"You've heard of Jacob and Tali?" asked John.

"Yeah, I can't exactly ignore your voice when you're only in the next room and visible through the window. It brings back . . . memories . . . or nightmares, haven't figured out which. Mordin has been analyzing your training style and explaining it to Miranda."

"How's she taking it?"

"With a glazed eye look for the most part. You know how long Mordin can talk. Of course it's not easy to listen to him while watching Jacob train when all you can do is sit, observe what you know is going to happen to you the moment you are discharged, and get only nutrient paste watered down and consumed through a straw for your meals."

"Which reminds me . . ." began John as Dr. Chakwas came out of the med bay.

"Mordin is going to be discharged today as soon as I get the last scan results, and not a day too soon. He kept wanting to see the reports and run tests on himself," said Karin. "And when I turned my back, he'd be analyzing the bed sheets, bed pans, the wall paint, and any paper products within reach."

"He's got a rather inquisitive mind," observed Garrus. "But for me the thing that almost destroyed my face a second time was when he wanted to take a tissue sample from Miranda. To see the look on her face . . Ow! It hurts just trying to recollect it."

"No stress for Garrus for at least another week, Commander," continued Karin. "And Miranda will be in bed for at least two more weeks. Stomach wounds can be fatal in the right circumstances but Miranda was lucky."

"Then we mesh Mordin in first thing after we track down Kasumi," concluded John.

"Looking forward to it no not quite will be put through much pressure but reminds me of days in special ops with fellow teammates and that cloaca Captain Kirrahe and his "hold the line" speeches," said Mordin walking out of sick bay.

"Mordin I have not discharged you yet," objected Karin.

"Doctor was busy talking so I examined test results myself and found that all readings are average giving me a clean bill of health so I discharged myself," he said. "After running secondary tests on machinery itself to determine accuracy met within parameters for acceptability. Glad to leave, Miranda was finding my requests for tissue samples," he paused to breath "burdensome."

"Commander?" came Joker's voice out of the intercom. "We are fifteen minutes from docking at the Citadel. And can I borrow a soldering iron? I'm looking to cross some wires to inflict pain on a certain nosy nellie who is complaining that I'm fudging my status reports."

"Mr. Moreau has been rounding up the decimals to the nearest full number in his reports thus reducing accuracy," argued EDI.

"It makes us look better and there's nothing going on that any alliance pilot wouldn't do!" argued Joker.

"No sabotage Joker," replied Shepherd.

"Why not?" asked Tali who was not at all unsympathetic to Joker's plight.

"Yeah yeah, no breaking the boss's toys," answered Joker.

"This is going to be just a step and fetch it Mordin, so it will be just me and Tali to get Kasumi. After that, you'll be joining Jacob and Tali for drill."

"Understood Commander," replied Mordin. "In my regard to my research on Collector Seeker Swarm . . ."

"Will have to wait until you are fully meshed," answered Shepherd. "No good you being dead from a fire fight before you've found the cure. No further missions with you until I know you are fully up to par with N7 standards."

"Understood Commander," he said.

Thirty minutes later, John and Tali walked out of the new Normandy and into the Citadel. There were numerous advertisements being broadcast on the round vids which dotted the main walk ways. From John's perspective, it had been only a few weeks since he had last been on the Citadel, but it's overall polish and beauty made him want to wander a little and enjoy it. Omega had been too dirty and desperate. For Tali, it had been longer, and it was bringing back one of her happier memories, the week of shore leave after Saren had been defeated.

"You could have taken Yacob," she suggested.

"Then it would have been three. I thought today would be two," replied John. "Me and you. Like a date."

"Commander Shepherd? Looking for someone to steal your heart?" suggested a round vid advertisement. "Try Goto Dating Services. You request, we acquire, we deliver."

"My heart's already taken Goto Dating," replied John with a chuckle while Tali gave him a quick squeeze around the waist.

"Never have figured out how those adverts know your name when you walk up to them," he continued.

"They read your omni-tool's public information data," answered Tali. "I had fun with them once by chanying my public data to sugyest I was that famous Asari dancer Matahari."

"The one who's affair with the Turian Primarch forced all those resignations on Palavan?" asked John.

"Yeah," giggled Tali. "I'd walk up to the vid and hear 'Matahari you don't have to resign yourself to an old body, keep it in shape with Lather's Yel. It restores moisturizing oils back into your skin so you will still look 100 when you are 800.' And the looks that people would give when they turned their heads and see me standing there."

John chuckled.

"That's my Tali, always clouding men's minds."

"Only yours Yahn, only yours."

"Pet . . . Store"

And John and Tali spent the next hour looking at the various fish which were for sale. After ordering a set of a hardier blue damsels which would be delivered and installed by the experts at the store into his cabin aquarium, they came back out and began looking for a little cafe they could grab some lunch at.

"Commander Shepherd?" began the advertisement Vid. "You have the clothes, but do you have the art? Contact Goto Replications and give us your request. Any classic so accurately duplicated that you will swear that you have the original and the museum has the forgery."

John paused for a second, but then shook his head and kept walking.

"What was that about Yahn?"

"Not sure, something seemed to remind me of something but I can't put my head around it."

Around the next corner was a charming cafe with tables outside so one could look at the water parks and the projected sky above. John knew they would be able to sit there because he saw a Turian couple eating at the table over. The waiter took their orders and delivered a sandwich to John and a processed fruit salad for Tali in a nice glass and brass tube. They spent a nice relaxing forty-five minutes at the cafe before they proceeded to move on. As the waiter was particularly polite, especially to Tali, John gave him a very nice tip. Tali was somewhat worried about the expense, but at the same time she liked the fact that John had taken her someplace nice. It was kind of like a date, even though they were actually looking for someone.

"Commander Shepherd, are you worried about your enemies stalking you from afar? Waiting to strike your back when you least expect it? Why bother with poorly trained and clumsy bodyguards? Try Goto Security and Escort service. You won't see us at all, and your foes won't see it coming."

"I've heard of Goto," said John, pausing and looking at Tali. "Where have I heard that name before?"

"I think they are some very large conglomerate," suggested Tali. "Because I've heard of them too. So where is this Kasumi supposed to meet you?"

"Tim's dossier wouldn't say. All I was told was that she would contact me when we came to the Citadel."

"Yahn! Look over there. We're at the Conduit. Let's go over and save the galaxy!"

"Okay Kitten," he said with a chuckle.

They walked over to where the miniature Mass Effect Conduit, which they had both thought once upon a time was just a model, stood as it had always stood. The keepers had repaired all the damage.

"Do you remember all the Mako's we destroyed?" asked John.

"Yeah," giggled Tali. "The first was destroyed in that volcanic eruption, the second in that nuclear blast, the third when we came to the Citadel . . ."

"And the fourth was destroyed with the Normandy," finished John somewhat quietly.

"Suddenly it's not funny any more," sighed Tali. "And that nuclear blast also took Ashley from us."

She reached over and held his hand and leaned against him for a moment.

"And we came close to losing Garrus, Miranda, and Mordin just a few days ago," said John. "I wonder how many will be lost before this is over with?"

"Not Yahn . . . Not Yahn . . . Not Yahn," sighed Tali. John wasn't sure if it was a recollection or a wish or a prayer.

"I already died once Tali," he said. "I'm not dying again."

"At least until I've done what I have to do, what ever that is," he thought to himself. "Until then, my legs, arms, and liver are negotiable."

The two of them were walking further along, crossing one of the lakes and approaching a large banking area, which included the offices and apartments of The Consort.

"Commander Shepherd? Are you looking for a good secure investment opportunity? Consider Goto, Goto, and Goto for your financial portfolio. The money will be pouring in so fast you'll swear you're robbing the banks."

John paused and looked at the Advertisement Vid Pillar.

"I think we've found Kasumi," he observed.

"Oh?" said the figure of a short woman with a low hood pulled over her face on the Vid. "I was wondering how many more advertisements it was going to take before you started to pay attention. Please tell me your password, Commander Shepherd."

"Silence is Golden," replied John.

"Good to finally meet you Commander Shepherd," said Kasumi. "Kasumi Goto. I'm a fan."

For the next few moments Shepherd conversed with the advertisement vid, and Kasumi informed him that the favor Cerberus had agreed to perform for her, as the price for her joining the crew, would be explained upon the Normandy itself. John agreed that discussing such mission planning through the means of an Advertisement Vid in the middle of a crowded pedestrian lane in the high financial district of the Citadel would be a bad idea. He bid farewell to Kasumi until they could meet on the Normandy.

"Now what?" asked Tali.

"We could take in a movie?" suggested John.

"Why do I get the idea that this contacting of Kasumi Goto was yust a cheap ploy to get me to go out with you?" teased Tali.

"Well for starters," began John. "You know you wanted to spend some time with me."

"True," agreed Tali

"And furthermore, you like being taken to nice places."

"True."

"And three, you want my body."

"We've yust started going out and already you see right through me," teased Tali with an exaggerated sigh.

"So about this movie?"

"What do you sugyest?" "There's supposed to be this film about a Hanar Specter called Blasto which is supposed to be really bad. I love going to horrible movies and mocking them with girls that I love. What do you say?"

"I heard Miranda mention it on Omega last week. If I can get a dextro snack or two, I'm easy," she answered.

"Tali? Do you have any idea what the phrase, 'I'm easy' suggests to a young human guy?"

"No?"

John just looked at her.

"Ooooooh," said Tali after a moment's thought. "On the Migrant Fleet it simply means you are willing to yust do what everyone else is going to do."

The movie was, true to John's expectations, awful. What made it particularly entertaining however was that the Hanar actor playing Blasto seemed to be taking the part extremely seriously. Even Tali got into the mockery though at one point the usher told the two of them that if they didn't be quiet, they would have to be escorted from the theater.

"That's the sort of film back on the the Navy bases that you got in to see free," explained John as they walked out afterwards, happily ignoring the stares from the other patrons who had found their running commentary annoying.

"How did they make any money by showing it?"

"You paid to get out," answered John.

The two of them returned to the Normandy around 1600 and John sat down with Kasumi, Jacob and Tali and got her mission requirements. Her former partner, Keiji Okuda had possessed a grey box, a neural implant which contained some rather problematic information which, in the wrong hands, could trigger a galactic wide war. More importantly, the dirty deeds so encrypted were implicating the Alliance. It had been taken by Donovan Hock. There was something eerily familiar about the name Hock, but John did not have time to pursue it.

The goal was quite simple. Kasumi and John would go to Hock's estate, located on the Bekenstein in the Boltzmann system, in the Serpent Nebula, take the grey box, and leave.

The problem that arose was that it would be just Kasumi and John. Tali immediately began to get 'territorial' especially since Kasumi insisted that he would have to wear a very nice outfit.

"Is there no way Tali can come?" asked John. He was not in a mood to be punched.

"Do you think Hock is going to let a Quarian into his mansion with his treasures?"

"He'd better," snapped Tali. "Yahn is mine."

"Oh!" said Kasumi. "Now it makes sense."

She paused for a moment and looked at John and Tali. Tali grabbed John's arm and scooted up close to him.

"Keiji was the man I loved," began Kasumi sadly. "Have you ever lost someone you cared about and wanted something of them to keep?"

Tali immediately felt a kinship with Kasumi in a way she had never felt a kinship with a human woman before. She gently removed her little braided copper wire ring and handed it to Kasumi. Kasumi looked at the ring and smiled thinking it was such a little thing of no value, only copper.

"Yahn made that for me, a week before he was killed," Tali said. "He called it my Pre-engayment ring."

Kasumi immediately understood. It didn't matter that it was only a bit of copper. For Tali, it was priceless because it had been a memento of John after his death, and the more valuable because it had been the one made by him.

"Trust me with your . . . Yahn . . . Tali . . . for a few hours, that I might get back what I have of Keiji."

That was a deal Tali could make. It was also the beginning of a very close friendship between the two women.

The mission took a full week to complete from the Normandy's departure from the Citadel to the return of Kisumi and John from the estate. The break in and acquisition of the grey-box had been the work of an afternoon during Hock's party with some of the most wealthy and criminal humans of the galaxy. John was able to personally experience a well planned heist. And since he had no intention of taking anything himself, he had a free conscious on the matter. The grey-box did not belong to Hock, it's acquisition would prevent a galactic war, and accordingly he was free to act. The vault had proven to be particularly fascinating for John, especially since there was such a curious collection of statues in the vault, including one of a rather monstrous creature which again, struck John as familiar.

"First the name of Hock, and then this horned monster," he mused quietly. "Why does this keep nagging at the edge of my memories?"

It was at this juncture, that Hock revealed that he had been on to them the whole time and the gunfighting began in earnest. Securing the grey-box, John and Kasumi fought their way out of the estate, survived the wrath of a highly shielded mantis gunship, and escaped on the Normandy's shuttle. That night, Kasumi reviewed Keiji's grey box. The crises came when Kasumi was able to review the intimate times she and Keiji had spent together. For a brief moment, all Kasumi was able to do was hold on to the tactile holograph that was all that remained of Keiji. Then Tali hugged her. And the crises passed.

Mordin began to drill with Garrus, Jacob, and Tali. John was forming his team. He knew Kasumi would be difficult to mesh. She was highly independent and quick to vanish when something she did not wish to be part of was present. But John was beginning to formulate ways to get around that. But first he would need to get Miranda trained. And she was still going to be a week in bed.

That night, after the first drill with Mordin, John returned to his cabin. Tali was not yet there, she had gone down to engineering to settle some more issues with the Normandy's engines. John was focusing on Garrus with Jacob and Mordin so Tali would have a chance to get to work on the engines with Kenneth and Gabby. Slowly she was working out designs for improvements. For all of Cerberus's work, there was always ways to improve the fit, and John, remembering the death of the first Normandy was going to make sure the second did not meet the same fate. He kicked off his clothes, got into his sweats and flopped down on the bed and fell asleep.

An hour later he was woken to the sweet kisses of Tali who once again was able to spend a few brief moments out of her helmet and gloves, and what's more she was free to kick off her boots as well. Apparently she had decided that kissing him while he was asleep would be more romantic. He was inclined to agree. It was a very pleasant way to be woken up.

And then John discovered why she kept trying to wrap her feet around his legs all those times.

Quarian toes are long and flexible, just like their fingers. And furthermore, the foot is also more flexible, able to twist a bit more.

Apparently what Tali had been trying to do all these times she had been hugging him was to grab on to him, not just by the shoulders with her fingers, but also just above his ankles by wrapping her toes around them. He found himself even more tightly gripped than prior. Of course there was something sensual in the manner in which she was latching on to him, but at the same time, it was something he had never experienced before and it acted to make her more special to him. He was not just being hugged by a pair of arms, but also a pair of legs, two pairs of fingers, and two pairs of toes.

Ever the purveyor of frustration, the Omni-tool announced the end of the reverie after exactly seven minutes and Tali whined plaintively for a second before she pulled back and began the process of putting herself back together again. John helped her, slipping her copper braided ring back on her right second finger at the end.

She settled into her usual spot, her head just in the crook of his arm while he lay upon his back.

"You never say much when you have your visor off," he observed. "In fact you don't talk at all."

"There's no time," sighed Tali. "It's the only time I get to kiss you and I don't want to waste any second of it talking about our day. We can do that at dinner or breakfast."

"Out of curiosity, how long before you get to remove your suit?"

"Oh that's months away," sighed Tali. "Now that I'm free to remove visor, gloves, and boots, I only get a little extension in time each day. Nothing more is to be removed for what seems to me to be forever."

"Why is that?"

"Face, hands, and feet are the chief means of contact with the environment," said Tali. "At least according to Mordin.

"Well at least at some point then, we'll not be kissing with your visor off and I can just sit in the room with you and look up and see that pretty face of yours," observed John.

"I can't believe you actually think I'm pretty," sighed Tali. "I mean I like it that you do, but I still find it so surprising. I mean I look at my face, covered in all that black hair and my eyes, just plain white while you have such beautiful eyes, all green like emerald and shifting in color all the time. It really helps given all the skin pores you have all over that face of yours."

"Wait a moment, are you telling me you can see my skin pores?"

Tali turned on the lights for a second and slipped up on his stomach.

"Well yes, why wouldn't I?"

"I can't see them."

"You can't? You can't see that you have skin pores, all those little holes?"

"No Tali I can't. Just like I can't see this black hair you claim is all over your face. What does my face look like to you?"

"Well," she said impishly. "You have a bit of loose skin flacking off there," and she poked her finger on the tip of his nose. "You have a clogged sweat gland there," and she poked at a spot just under his nose. "And you have blackheads there, there, there and over there, and gracious, three are three more over here" and she proceeded to poke at his skin with her fingers in a few more places. "And you always miss that spot shaving," and she proceeded to tweak a few spots under his chin and he felt her tug at some hairs there. "And you have way to much skin oil oozing out in that little dimple" and now she rubbed the spot on next to his left nostril. "And that tear duct really needs a deep cleaning." Then she paused for what John suspected was dramatic effect. "And we get to . . . The Nose Hairs." And she grabbed one and yanked it out. It hurt just a bit but it was a particularly long one and John did not begrudge it's loss. He was simply too amazed at this turn of events. Something happened that he had never, in a million years, suspected would happen to him.

"I can't believe this," groaned John. "I'm the ugly duckling. How can you stand to look at me?"

She tilted her head.

"Because Yahn, you make me feel safe. You make the scary things go away. Every time in the past few years that I have felt that I could die, you were there to save me. And all I have to do is look into those gemstone eyes of yours and I'm lost. I don't have to see your whole face, I can look into your eyes. I can taste those tangy kisses of yours. And I know I'll be safe. And I've gotten used to the way you look. It's not like it was when I first met you and felt that you were so dirty my skin would crawl off my back."'

"Thanks Tali," he said not entirely enthusiastically, but at the same time somewhat humbled. "I guess I'm pretty lucky that you love me."

"Not as lucky as I am that you love me," she said gently running her fingers over his face. "Not as lucky as me. To be in your arms, every night, on the Normandy, with Yoker and Garrus. And maybe we'll get Liara back too. And Kaiden. It will be like it was once upon a time, when this fairy princess was a frightened little girl who tested her prince so she wouldn't have to fly to the moon."

She sighed.

"Now if I could only get out of this suit!"

"They say good things come to those who wait," joked John, though he was likewise suffering from bouts of impatience at the time it was taking for him to fully be with her. He found it interesting that while he was looking forward to making love to her, what he really wanted was for her to be his genuine wife. In fact, he was already ready to marry her even if it would be months before they could actually consummate it. He knew that he couldn't just go into the Church of Our Lady of the Stars in the Citadel and get the priest to marry them. Catholic Priests, ever the sons of their mother the church, were not going to just up and marry a couple. There would be interviews, consultations with parents, promises to be made, it was a mess which he respected, but likewise knew was impossible given the demands that were being made by the missions they were having to perform. Human treachery guaranteed that it would take time before the Catholic Church would marry them. And that didn't even cover the issue of dealing with the theological implications that marrying another species of sentient might entail. While he strongly suspected that the Church would allow it, he had no illusions that there would be one hell of a controversy around it.

And the Migrant Fleet was not going to recognize the validity of any marriage until _after_ they had consummated it. He didn't find that particularly odd however, that difference in approaches, precisely because a Quarian union was, by it's very nature in Quarian psychology, more trustworthy than a human one. When a Quarian couple made love, they were so psychologically bound to one another that abandonment simply did not happen. The husband would not duck and run the moment the wife was pregnant. The wife would not up and abandon her husband because someone richer had come along. There was no need for all the regulations which governed human marriages.

"I'm tired of waiting. There are times when I'm kissing you that I'm so damned itchy I could scream," Tali was complaining. John remembered when she had punched him because he had expressed impatience and complained suggesting that her waiting bouts had not been as demanding. So he felt at this juncture that she had it coming.

"We could stop kissing," he suggested with an impish grin on his face.

Tali punched him in the usual spot. Not particularly hard of course, more along the lines of a tap, but still . . .

"Totally worth it," he said chuckling.

"You Bosh'tet," she said.

They turned out the lights and snuggled up and fell asleep.

The Normandy was proceeding into the system of Osun and approaching a orbital space station named Purgatory. On that station, was a prisoner, which Tim's dossier referred to as Jack.

"Very powerful biotic," mused John at the breakfast table with Tali sitting next to him on his right and Jacob on the left. Garrus was next to Tali, once again the two of them were always together at meals since they shared the same food preferences. Mordin was across the table. His special opts training had enabled him to mesh quickly under drill and this was to be his first real mission. "And there's just enough information here that suggests she's a little on the unstable side."

"Just a little?" asked Garrus. "If this is Tim talking do we need rocket launchers?"

"Rocket launchers grenade launchers armor infiltration gas we are approaching Blue Suns prison ship might remember Archangel could be," Mordin paused to take his trademarked breath, "messy."

"Timing is an issue here Commander," observed Jacob.

"Didn't plan on doing the Quarian Two-step with the Blue Suns when I went to pick up Archangel," argued Shepherd. "We could delay and hope that the Blue Suns forget that Garrus was Archangel, we could hope that they don't recognize him, but if there are Turians on that ship, we'd have to wait another fifty years."

"And at the risk of swelling the Commander's head any further," added Garrus. "It's far more likely they'll recognize Shepherd before they'll recognize Archangel."

"And if they recognize you both," chirped Tali. "They'll be getting what Yahn calls, a 'twofer'."

"And there is the possibility that they will simply honor the contract and promise us that they'll get us 'next time'," mused Shepherd.

"Are you going to count on that?" asked Jacob. "Granted Tim is pretty powerful, but Purgatory Space Station is a long way from Tim's base. 'Uphill both ways' as my mother would put it."

"No we're not," said John. "We are going in armed, armored, and in full battle formation. And if that doesn't send a message to the Blue Suns, then we're up against stupid."

"And you can't fix stupid," chirped Tali.

The Normandy docked and Team Shepherd entered the ship. John and Jacob were the front of the square while Garrus was on the right as Wing Sniper. It was his usual position, one he had mastered back when it was Team Specter. The back of the box was Tali on Shepherd's six and Mordin on Jacob's six. Tali was again Engineer while Mordin was designated Special Ops. The entrance was peaceful enough, the security requested that weapons be checked and Shepherd politely declined. Then Warden Kuril, a Turian who betrayed no recognition of Garrus arrived and explained that it was standard procedure and surely Shepherd understood. John indicated that yes he did understand that it was standard, but no, the team would not be divesting themselves of their weapons.

Warden Kuril paused for a moment, and then decided to let it pass. After all, it was a prisoner pick up for a rather psychotic biotic. The team was then led down the corridors to the main processing area. Once again, John was everything Tali loved about him. He gave what prisoners he could a bit of courtesy and consideration, even intervening on behalf of one who was being beaten by the an angry guard. It didn't matter how many the man had killed, John very adroitly pointed out to the guard that he was at risk of becoming just like that criminal. That had a very profound impact on the guard, who stood down.

They reached the processing area's outer office and when they got to the last door, they heard that door lock, they saw the staff depart out the other door, and then the warden informed John that he was way more valuable as a slave than Cerberus's payment for Jack.

"Turian Treachery," observed John. "Now there's a switch."

And the gun fight began.

The Blue Suns were a professional mercenary unit. They had modern weapons. They had modern armor with good shielding. Each one was a skilled combatant. But that was exactly what the problem was with the Blue Suns. Each man was his own unit. No team training went into the Blue Suns. And as Archangel Garrus and his team had done time and time again on Omega, teams of them would come into terrain of John's own choosing, and be caught in the crossfire. The first firefight set the pace for the next five minutes on Purgatory. Tali promptly closed and locked the door that the staff had exited from requiring the first unit of Blue Suns guards to take the time to try to get through the jumbled security. By the time they had opened the door, Team Shepherd was in position and ready. John and Jacob unleashed a withering fire from their auto-assault guns while Garrus took out the rear Merc rightly suspecting he would be the team leader. And Mordin tossed into the group a smoke grenade which obscured their vision. Forty five seconds later that team was 'neutralized.' It took a full five seconds for John's team's shields to recoup from Blue Suns gunfire damage. In short, it wasn't a fight. It was a slaughter.

And so they moved down the corridors. Garrus in front as sniper and recon until they were able to get to the cell block where Jack's cell was supposed to be. Tali quickly opened up the cryogenic storage unit and brought Jack out of hibernation. And once she was up, she unleashed. Bald head and tattooed and utterly bereft of any serious clothing outside a pair of cut out pants, she proceeded to blow holes in front of her and head off in a new direction. And now the team was busy not only fighting off random bits of Blue Suns, but also unleashed serial killers from every known species in the galaxy. At least the serial killers were less armed and armored than the Blue Suns. All this and chasing Jack too who seemed to be completely oblivious to them.

"Unstable," groaned Jacob. "Those scissors are too ground down for that word to even _begin_ to cut it."

"I'm suffering from a bit of confusion about this mission," radioed Garrus from the front flank. "Are we here to rescue Jack from this prison or this prison from Jack?"

Jack seemed to possess a semblance of a plan albeit simple and not particularly thought out. That plan seemed to consist of blowing every single Cell Block into the void of space and then make it to the docks before the station itself was blown into the void. It was clear however that she had not thought beyond blowing the place up. For when she reached the docks and saw only one spaceship docked and the Cerberus logo on that space ship being that it was the Normandy, she expressed an opinion on the results of her shoddy calculations.

"FUCK!" she shouted. But that wasn't the end of it.

Now swearing acts to unleash pressure on the psyche and can be of benefit since one does not have to engage in other more hostile actions, such as kicking the cat, throwing the coffee cup, punching John Michael Shepherd in the arm, or shooting random people in the street.

"When angry," advises Mark Twain. "Count to ten. When very angry, swear."

But there comes a point, such as after you have said the same swear word for the twenty-sixth time in the past thirteen seconds, that it is clear you possess other issues which need resolving. And it was clear that Jack had issues. One was that she had run out of breath to swear, for that she waved her arms and screamed and paced back and forth like a caged animal. She turned to face one more guard. But he died before she could unleash her biotics upon him. She turned around yet again and saw Team Shepherd facing her, with John's pistol out and aimed.

She had no doubt she was facing the team that had come from that Cerberus vessel, and suddenly her expression became that of a frightened little girl. John noted it and a small piece of his heart went out to her. Something had really messed this girl up.

"What the hell do you want?" her challenge rang out. She was going to bluff it through.

"You're in a bad situation and I'm going to get you out of here," he suggested.

"Shit, you sound like a pussy," was her reply to that.

Tali engaged in a visor palm.

"I'm not going anywhere with you," she continued. "You're Cerberus."

Jacob was wondering if he should blush.

"I'm here to ask for your help," began John.

"You show up in a Cerberus frigate to take me somewhere?" she asked. And John suspected very much that she had every reason in the world to be suspicious. "You think I'm stupid?"

"This station is going down in flames," observed John. "We can get you to safety and are asking your help."

"We could knock her out and take her," suggested Garrus.

"Have several hallucinogenic gas grenades swift application no bad idea radius of gas will impact own team, must think out another plan," suggested Mordin.

"I'd like to see you try," replied Jack.

"Be careful what you wish for," suggested Tali. "You don't know Garrus. You don't know Yahn."

"We're not going to attack her," ordered John.

"Good move," replied Jack. "Look! You want me to come with you? Make it worth my while."

"Join my team and I'll do what I can for you."

"Don't make promises you can't keep," she replied. "I bet that ship has a lot of Cerberus data bases. I want to see my files. See what Cerberus has got on me. You want me on your team, let me go through those data bases."

"I'll give you full access," answered John.

It was evening on the Normandy. Jack had found a hole in the bottom of the ship to call her home. John had gone down there to talk with her and then come back up.

Tali was waiting for him in their cabin. She was struggling with the keyboard of the piano trying out lesson two. And finding it extremely frustrating. She wasn't used to not being able to manipulate keyboards and buttons.

"Kitten? The piano was designed to be played by five fingers. I don't think you'll be able to do much with it."

She sighed.

"I think you're right Yahn. But I yust like listening to you play and wondered."

"How can you like it Kitten? All I'm doing is playing drills, going up and down the keyboard training my hands so some day I'll be able to play Beethoven or Schubert or Mozart.

"There's still rhythm, order . . . harmony. I like that 'do do do do **do** do do do dooo' she chirped imitating the notes going up and down the keyboard. Her head and hands bounced to the notes while her fingers wiggled in rhythm. "And then the next set of notes is a little higher, and then the next set, and so on."

"I wouldn't be doing it now if you hadn't made me. Strange, I'm so used to commanding, until I get into this cabin and it's 'Yes Tali' and 'No Tali.'"

"Well of course," agreed Tali. "We girls rule the world you know."

She giggled.

"But I'm still stronger than you!" he shouted and grabbed her and began to wrestle her to the bed. There was more than a little energetic playful struggle until John placed an open palm on her left hip and trying to grab hold, given how wide her hips were, suddenly discovered something else about Tali.

"NO! Yahn WHOOOT! I'm ticklish there WHOOOT!"

"Oh? Ticklish eh? I'll show you ticklish!"

It took John a few more tries over the next fifteen seconds but when you are determined to get to the bottom of something (pun intended) you can figure out a lot very quickly.

"WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! YAHN! NO! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! I'LL BE GOOD! I'LL BE GOOD! I'LL BE GOOD! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT!"

Apparently, Tali was ticklish by placing the hand upon her hips, securing a descent flat grasp upon the skin, and rubbing it on the muscular structure underneath. Unlike a human woman where you pinch the waist it was the friction of the skin upon the outer muscles of the hips and backside on Tali.

Of course it has already been established that Tali's laughter was a cross between a monkey's call and an owl's hoot. And under the right conditions it could be loud enough. But this was a full volume hooting. John had no intention of stopping, at least for a while. Tali was completely immobilized upon the bed, her arms and legs flailing as John deftly avoided being whacked by the random kicking and swinging as she struggled to not laugh as well as fight him off. A young girl madly in love with a guy really can't defend herself against a determined tickle attack, they lose complete control of their bodily functions on several levels. And of course like all young girls in this predicament with the men they loved, part of her was totally enjoying it.

"WHOOT! NO! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! PLEASE YAHN! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! YAHN! HELP! HELP! WHOOT WHOOT! YAHN!"

It's at this point that the author will apparently go completely off topic and comment upon the ventilation of a space ship. Like water vessels, there has to be a certain level of air and water tightness upon the vessel if you are going to keep it either floating, in the case of a boat, or pressurized, in case of a spaceship. And this means that the air is going to be horribly stagnant. There's not a single sailor upon a single vessel who isn't aware that you have to find ways of getting air down into the hull of a water bound vessel, and on a spaceship, air circulation is likewise a must or certain pockets of stale air and other gasses build up making conditions rather uncomfortable.

For this reason a space ship has a ventilation system which is in constant action moving air from one area to the other keeping temperatures stable as well as scrubbing out CO2. And since sound moves better if it is going in the same direction as moving air, should there be an intact vent which exits one's cabin between say, the aquarium and closet and runs along the spine of the ship until it empties above the pilot's chair, really loud hooting can carry quite a ways and put all sorts of interesting ideas into the Pilot's head.

"Oh man!" groaned Joker listening to the faint hoots which were coming from above his head. "Way to go Commander! Rub it in! Show us all that you have a real screamer! Remind me what I can't do without breaking my back!"

This of course drew the attention of other crew members nearby leading to a very sweet and pink blush by Kelly who had just come up to make more mental notes on Joker's interaction with EDI.

"In fact Mr. Moreau," explained EDI. "The commander is only tickling Tali."

"Yeah EDI, tell me about those . . . tickles," replied Joker. "Like you would really know."

"I assure you Mr. Moreau, I am well aware of . . ."

But by now John was having to rest and refit, having burned up a great deal of energy immobilizing a very bouncy Quarian fiancé, and was laying upon the bed catching his breath. Tali was likewise on the bed, on her stomach, her head leaning over the edge panting heavily from exhaustive laughter. She was of course paying no attention to the out vent beneath her which was channeling air down to the lower part of the engine room where her loud pantings, only faint on the wind over Jack's bed, were inspiring Jack to bury her head in a pillow as her shoulders spasmed.

John and Tali had recovered and were turning off the lights and settling down. John had gotten into his sweats and of course Tali was still in her suit, as she nearly always was.

"How long until the next time?" asked John.

"Eight minutes tomorrow morning," sighed Tali.

"Eight whole minutes with your visor off, what will I do?"

"If you can't think of something Yahn, I'm sure I can."

"You promise?"

"I promise," answered Tali. "So how did it go with Yack."

"Loose cannon and wild card are insufficient descriptions," sighed John. "She tried to seduce me and persuade me to be a pirate in less than fifteen minutes after she settled in and I checked in on her."

"I'm getting my shotgun and pistol."

"Tali, don't bother, she's not at all attractive."

"I don't care if you truly think I'm the most beautiful thing in the world and she's the most ugly, you're _my_ Yahn!"

"Well you probably won't have to kill her anyway. If she doesn't try to kill me if I try to mesh her with the team, she'll be dead soon enough. She's on full self-destruct. God help her."

"Why would you worry?"

"Tali? I was dead. I saw what was on the other side. I worry about everyone who dies in a state of hatred and loathing, because I know what awaits them."

"Yahn? What was it like . . . Being dead?"

"It was wonderful. You had all the time in the world to do what ever you wanted. There was this little Quarian girl who was playing with God, and He was letting her win. She told me about her mother, and father, and how happy she was. She was a cutie."

"What was God like?"

"See the crucifix I put up over our bed? That's what he looks like to me. But to that little Quarian girl, she didn't see him that way I think. She called him Rannoch . . ."

"We always thought our home world was what watched over us," mused Tali. "So what you're saying is that it's kind of true."

"He does Tali. That's why He asked me to come back. To fight the Reapers."

"That's all?" It was a playful tease, but there was a bit of territorial in it as well.

"And be with you of course. That was really important. I can't do it without you. I know that now."

They closed their eyes and cuddled up. Shortly thereafter, they were asleep.


	13. Chapter 13 - Shakeup On (the) Horizon

The Normandy was sailing to the planet of Korlas. There was supposed to be a Korgan Warlord there. Miranda however, was in drill. She knew what to expect, and for once her pride proved an asset. She didn't sneer, scream or refuse. She had seen Jacob go though it. She had seen Mordin, Garrus and Tali go through it. She wasn't going to let them show her up. And so she focused and let Shepherd drive her to her limits.

It wasn't easy for her. Her father had, by pampering her when she was young, kept her on a leash. Her getting away from him had been the first step of independence but you can't easily break free from domination without learning something of it's tricks yourself. She had dominated in Cerberus, she was Cerberus personified. Jack picked up on it quickly and called her the Cerberus Cheerleader, when Jack wasn't describing her in words less polite. Jack however was deriving extreme satisfaction from Miranda's sweat. Shepherd on the other hand, was deriving extreme satisfaction from seeing Jack mock Miranda. Not that Jack actually knew about what John had in mind. But the more Jack was around to sneer at Miranda in drill, the harder it would be for Jack to say no to it herself when John put her into it.

That was the theory anyway.

Even so, Miranda had it harder than Mordin or Jacob. She was used to the soft life. She was used to things coming easy for her. Learning how to juggle guns and biotic powers in the rapid cadence of Shepherd's drill and having to deal with the fact that she was making mistakes and being told "BANG YOU'RE DEAD!" wore on her considerably. But she was good, she was on the top, she would not let it get her down. Like Ashley before her, there were no tears.

As the team neared Korlas, Shepherd put them all together and drilled them for two hours each day, letting them mesh. Tali was still Duck. Garrus was still Bugs. Jacob was named Hood. Miranda had the name of Cheers, which Jack incessantly mocked. John's first impulse had been to give Miranda the name of Tease, but thought the better of it. So he let Jack give her the code talk name, thought Jack did not necessarily know he had used her as inspiration. Mordin was Smoke.

"So what are you going to name Kasumi?" asked Tali one evening as they were settling down.

"I'm thinking of calling her Hai," answered John. "It's Japanese for yes, or I agree, or okay. Something which suggests agreement but does not necessarily obligate you to agree."

"And Yack?"

"Pain in the ass?"

"Kind of long to snap code orders to," observed Tali. "So will Miranda be a Wing-girl?"

"Spotter for Garrus," answered John. "Like Liara. Ashley was armored and fast. Miranda has only shields and paint."

"Then what about Kasumi?"

"Stealth Recon," replied John.

"And Yack"

"Pain in the ass."

"We've already gone there Yahn."

"I'm not looking forward to Jack," he groaned. "I like living pain free. Why couldn't she be like you were, cute and cuddly and easy to scream at?"

"Yahn?" she said soft and sweetly. "I have a fist."

"I know Kitten, I know."

Korlas was yet another example of double s double d. The mission was to recruit the Krogan Warlord Dr. Okeer. He was working on his project in a Blue Suns camp, which of course proved less than receptive to the arrival of Team Shepherd. It was a firefight all the way in. But the Blue Suns still suffered from the absence of team work, and now with Garrus reinforced by Miranda, who was both spotter and bio-shield, the team made it in and out with little in the way of collateral damage.

But not with Dr. Okeer. He died protecting his legacy, a single 'pure' tank bred Krogan named Grunt.

Grunt proved to be typical Krogan, that is, kill first and ask questions later. Shepherd, remembering his experiences with Wrex, was more than able to get Grunt's trust within a matter of moments after he opened the tank. And furthermore, Grunt was more than happy to begin drill, which enabled Shepherd to once again delay the inevitable issues with independent Kasumi and psychotic Jack.

Then they got a message from Tim.

"Shepherd," he began. "I think we have them. Horizon, one of our colonies, in the Terminus systems has just gone silent. If it is not under attack, it soon will be. Has Mordin delivered the counter measure for the seeker swarms?"

"Not yet," answered John.

"Let's hope he works well under pressure," suggested The Illusive Man. "There's also something else you should know. One of your former crew, Kaiden Alenko, he's stationed on Horizon. "

"The Collectors just happen to pick a colony with one of my former crew? I don't buy it."

"It shouldn't be a surprise that the Collectors are interested in you," retorted The Illusive Man. "Especially if they're working for the Reapers. They might be going after him to get to you."

John could not dispute that. There were wheels behind the events.

"There is such a thing as hatred, and malice of revenge," suggested a line from The Lord of the Rings.

Tim vanished and John went up to the Pilot's seat. Joker was as usual arguing with EDI.

"You're just mad that all your footage of me looks like a dream sequence," he said.

"What's this about Joker?"

"Hi Commander we're just arguing over the decoration of my personal space."

"Putting grease on my cameras does not constitute valid decoration of personal space," argued EDI.

"Set course for Horizon and Joker? You do realize there's a pool on for when you and EDI are going to be an item."

"Not Funny Commander!" shouted Joker.

John walked away chuckling to himself. Of course there was no such thing. But it did get a good rise out of Joker. And after finding out that there had been a pool for him and Tali, well revenge is a dish best served cold.

From there he went straight to Mordin's lab.

"Commander," began Mordin. "Enjoying the lab already found several spying devices bugs and monitoring equipment destroyed most gave the most expensive back to Miranda."

"Glad you're enjoying yourself. What's the news on the Seeker Swarm Antidote? Tell me you have something."

Mordin smiled and turning to his terminal said, "Yes."

John, glad that the last bits of work for the day was done, headed back up to his cabin. He half expected Tali to be there already, she was going to get fifteen minutes of out of visor time. So when he reached the door to the cabin and found it locked, he was briefly confused.

"One moment Yahn!" came Tali's voice from inside.

"Tali?"

"Dokey, entavo!"

John was somewhat confused. But he tried the door again and it opened.

Tali was seated on the bed, her knees up her feet bare, her two pairs of toes gripping the sheets. Her arms were wide open with her fingers spread and she had a big smile on her face. Her black hair was longer than he remembered it from brief periods prior, as if she were letting it grow. It was framing her face in a very pleasant manner. She looked more than cute, she was looking rather um . . . sexy. And this was in spite of the fact that she was still wearing the majority of her suit.

"Sukee do!" she said in a slightly sultry tone.

"What are you saying Tali? I don't speak Khelish."

"De go dotooli Khelish, Yahn. Sukee do!"

"Tali? You do understand me don't you?"

"Rho!"

John sighed.

"If you understand me, nod your head."

Tali nodded her head.

"Well I don't understand what you are saying. I am only hearing you speak Khelish."

Suddenly Tali understood, she giggled and held up her hand. Reaching up to her left ear, she pulled out a small unit and making a quick adjustment with her omni-tool, put it in John's left ear.

"Reah go dotoolou do wone Yahn?" was what she said.

"Do you understand me now Yahn?" was what the little bud in his ear translated.

"Yes," said John. "Now I can understand you."

"Fea! Won sukee do!"

"Good! Now kiss me!"

And he did. For a full five minutes, but then he pulled back, putting his finger on her mouth, since she was already beginning to show signs of arousal as she pressed herself closer and closer to him. He had noticed that the longer they kissed, the more intense she was at it, as if she were deliberately unleashing more and more of her emotion and passion and desire into each kiss.

"Tali," he said. "I hardly ever get to look at your face. I want to see you tonight for a moment."

"But Yahn, this is the only chance we have to kiss. This is the only time I get to feel your face with my fingers, to wrap my feet around your legs to . . ."

"I know Tali, but it's no good you getting all exited about it. It's going to be months before you get to leave your entire suit behind, and all you're getting is frustrated."

"I LIKE getting frustrated," she argued.

"No way!" he argued. He certainly didn't. Which was one of the reasons why he was trying to pull back. It hadn't been a problem when they were only allowed a few moments like this, but now that they were up to a quarter of an hour, her passion was getting him more than a little aroused, and while his new body did not have the same cravings his old body had, since this body had not yet made love with a women, he knew all the signs from his prior experiences.

"It tells me I love you," she persisted. "Why do you think I scream when it's over?"

"Because you're frustrated and you have to stop?"

"Well yes, but . . ."

John gave her another few seconds of kissing before he once more put his finger on her mouth.

"Well yes but what?"

"It's how I deal with it. I scream and it makes all the cravings go away, or at least settle down."

"Tali Tali Tali," he said gently rubbing her lips with his finger. She commenced to nibble slightly upon his finger tip. "I know you love kissing, but you're enthusiasm for this is really driving me crazy. I can't scream to make it go away."

"You can't? Oh my Yahn, I really have been driving you crazy haven't I?"

"Well not all the time," he admitted. "Sometimes I'm able to just lie back and enjoy the kissing, but the last couple of nights you seem to have been really unleashing all the . . . Mmm . . . What IS the word I'm looking for?"

"You are asking me? I don't speak English," she quipped.

"Well what ever it is that you're unleashing, it's an awful lot of it and it's overwhelming me."

Tali sighed.

"Why is it NEVER easy for us?"

"Because I'm Human, you're Quarian, and I want you to be healthy when we make love so that we can do it again as much as we like."

"Well I would like that," she admitted with a coy flirt in her voice. "No fun using you for your body if I can't use it all the time."

"You're a cruel and wicked Quarian," joked John.

"But you're okay with that," replied Tali with a giggle.

"But I was serious just a moment ago. I don't hardly ever get a chance to look at that very pretty face of yours. We spend all our time kissing and I can't see that black soft light hair, those two really exotic pairs of eye brows which go up your forehead in such a enchanting manner, those pretty thin pink lips and . . . And those sparkling eyes. Your eyes are so incredible. In the light they flash all the colors of the rainbow, tiny little sparkles here and there. And in the dark, they glow so softly, like the moon without the green craters. You just keep getting prettier and prettier the more I look at you."

Tali looked at him and was once again nibbling her lower lip with her row of little front teeth.

"You don't mind me telling you all this do you?" he said with half a grin.

"Oh Yahn, our love enables me to put up with it," She nodded her head smiling.

"In other words you eat it up?"

"Yeah."

They kissed a little more and then John rolled over on his back, Tali found herself resting on top of his chest with her arms folded under her. The two of them caressed each other's faces while John spoke as poetically as he could on the lovely features of her face and expressions, and she listened, all the while looking into each others eyes.

And then the Omni-tool beeped and with a sigh, Tali started putting her gloves and boots back on. It had become a little tradition that once her gloves were on, John would slip the little copper ring back upon her finger.

The team landed on Horizon, outside the main city, where a new set of anti-aircraft cannons were busy monitoring the sky. It was clear however that there was something wrong. First of all, the guns were not firing at a very large and alien ship which was landed right on the edge of the city. The second was that the air was filled with seeker swarms. The third was that there were no people.

Like most new colonial settlements, the housing was prefab and small, laid out in directly on the ground with only trampled dirt marking the pathways. The team moved out slowly and cautiously in spite of everything in Shepherd's psychology telling him that they needed to hurry. Hurry killed soldiers. And good soldiers were hard to make.

The team was now seven in number. The center formation was a five point star, Shepherd at point, Grunt and Jacob on his sides, with Mordin and Tali behind. Garrus was right wing with Miranda as spotter.

Miranda was wearing more and more leather. John had observed that her prior outfits would not protect her skin from scratches due to thorns and briars which they would be having to negotiate through on most surface missions. Likewise rubble with pounded metal would also have sharp surfaces. Scratches discolor and mar the skin, even if only briefly. He didn't have to point that out, Miranda recognized it immediately the moment he observed the existence of sharp edges. Her posterior in particular was considerably less a distraction these days. And, both he and Tali complimented her on the new look. Tali, once John had explained to her how distracting Miranda was to him, realized she had a vested interest in playing to Miranda's vanity. In fact, Tali noticed that the more she complimented Miranda the more Miranda responded favorably to her. It wasn't sparking a friendship, but it was sparking mutual respect.

The collectors were not expecting an attack. They were only used to dealing with colonists who were seldom armed, and always immobilized by the bugs. It was a long dull boring job of finding all the frozen people, throwing them into the processor pods, and pushing them back to the ship.

Miranda had excellent vision, especially with the Hud clip she was wearing over her eyes. Her vanity had made sure that the one she had picked looked like a very sleek and fashionable set of sunglasses.

"Hostiles on our eleven, platoon strength, ferrying paralyzed civilians, high probability of surprise," was her report. Garrus was already scoping for the lead officer.

"Cheers, Bugs, Flank," reported John.

"Star forward slow, keep cover," he continued.

Tali's heart was clipping along at a good pace. She kept looking at John's back. It was always hard at this point of the mission. Her tongue tasted bitter, her feet were itching, as were her fingers. Grunt was to her left and likewise shaking, but she knew it wasn't from fear. It was from excitement. This was going to be his first battle and as far as Tali knew, Krogan didn't know the word fear, let alone how to spell it. John scooted forward ten yards to a new spot of cover.

"Clear" he said.

Everyone else shot forward crouched to find new cover themselves.

"Commander," began Miranda's agitated voice. "They are taking the colonists all away! We've got to hurry!"

"Calm Cheers," was all John said. "Bugs? Position?"

"On it Commander," replied Garrus.

"Scope Bugs," answered John.

"Locked and loaded," replied Garrus calm and sweet.

"At will Bugs," said John.

They made another push forward, only five yards. After Noveria, after Feros, after Virmire, after Ilos, after Omega, after Purgatory, after Korlas, you would think that it would be easier.

Tali's breath was screaming to be allowed to hyper-ventilate. But she had to control. Your enemy could hear you breathe, they would lock on your position, you would feel the bullets break through your armor. You would see your own blood on the ground, and then you die.

"Bang! You're dead, Duck!" came the memory. It was the craziest damned love song he had ever sung to her.

The crack of Garrus's sniper rifle resounded through the air. She saw a collector drop, suddenly aware of the movement 150 yards in front of her. There were at least fifteen if not twenty collectors ahead. They were trying to find the sound of the sniper shot. But Garrus would not fire from the same position again. The second shot always told you the direction.

The Collectors had stopped collecting. They were frantically looking around, trying to find movement. Garrus and Miranda however, would be cloaked by Miranda's biotics. He would move to a new position, further around the group of Collectors, and . . .

There was another crack of the sniper rifle and another collector's head exploded out the front. He had been hit in the back of the head. The collectors, seeing that wound, knew where to turn towards. And it was away from the John's star.

They pushed forward another ten yards.

John was watching the collectors from his own hud.

Another sniper shot. This one didn't hit, but it did keep the collectors looking in that direction. The team was closing the yardage, bit by bit.

"Open up," was John's order.

And all five guns resounded sending a wave of cold iron into the backs of the Collector platoon.

Tali ducked behind the cover John was at, reloaded her shotgun, and scanned with her omni-tool, tracking down the frequencies the Collectors were employing. She introduced a random jamming mod to keep their own communications in a constant state of channel shifting to avoid the sudden brief bursts of frequency. In combat, she always found herself getting as close to him as possible. Something about him made her feel safer. She knew on some level it was dangerous, it made two team members vulnerable to a grenade as opposed to one, but she found herself doing it anyway.

Reminding herself that if the Collectors got her and Yahn's 20, they would get special attention, she started to roll away from him. Bullets flashed around her but she was fast and knew to get to cover. Her shields covered her long enough.

The collectors had good shields. They had good guns. But they had absolutely no real combat experience. They were raiders, slipping in, immobilizing civilian populations, and leaving. Against a trained team, especially one trained by Shepherd, they were totally out of their league. Any one of them could be a good shot, and keep any one of Shepherd's team down. But as Tali noted, she had at least ten seconds to take her shot before her shields were in danger of being compromised, and she needed only six. She had gotten good over the weeks of shooting.

And then she realized she needed to be shooting every four seconds. Dozens of husks suddenly materialized behind what was left of the collectors and commenced to charge.

The husk was a creature that they had encountered when fighting the geth. Humans, put upon large spikes which were dubbed dragon's teeth, would be transformed over a period of hours into a cross between a synthetic and organic life form utterly immune to pain and entirely focused on ripping it's opponents to shreds. Their armored protection was practically nil, their employment was in massed numbers and their tactic was overwhelming. Geth husks were easy enough to deal with, but these were tougher. A single shot gun blast might be all that was needed, but everyone had to focus on shooting husks if they were going to have a chance at not being dog-piled and ripped apart. But as the mass of husks closed in on the team, a green glowing ball flew up and over them, and exploded sending a cloud of small bullets into the hoard and putting down over three quarters of them. At this point a human hoard would retreat, hide, get reorganized by their commanders and reinforced with more cannon fodder, and sent in again just as large. But these husks just kept coming, scattered out so that everyone, by shooting at the husk closest to them was able to take them out and leave them nothing but shredded up bits of flesh and electronics on the grounds.

"Grapeshot Grenade made it myself fun high school project done over summer vacation for extra credit," said Mordin.

In possession of the field, John and his team began to examine what was left.

"These husks look more advanced than what we encountered on Eden Prime," observed Shepherd.

"Looks like Tim was right," added Jacob. "We have Reaper involvement.

"Were these colonists?" asked Grunt.

"No Dragon's Teeth," answered Mordin. "These husks were brought in."

"Yes," agreed Garrus who was just coming up behind Miranda. "They were in a big steel container which was closed up when Miranda and I passed it. Otherwise we would have known they were there and could have warned you."

Then they reached the first of the frozen colonists.

"Completely trapped in status, fully aware," observed Mordin. "Fascinating."

"What are they doing with the colonists?"

"Many possibilities," suggested Mordin. "All of them . . . unpleasant."

The team continued to move forward. Finally they encountered on survivor who was not yet frozen. He informed them of the location and issues surrounding the anti-aircraft gun emplacements. But he knew nothing of where Kaiden was, possessing the opinion that the Collector attack on the colony was Kaiden's fault.

Once again Garrus and Miranda moved ahead while the star formation proceeded cautiously behind them.

"You aren't going to believe this Shepherd," came Garrus' voice over the com. "The main problem with the guns is that they need calibration."

"Why do I get the idea that you find that problem . . . entertaining," asked John.

"Well it's always gratifying to know that had I been here the colony would have been safe," he replied, with a half jocular, half regretful tone.

The team moved into another plaza surrounded by prefabs, but likewise, filled with various boxes and crates which indicated construction. Garrus and Miranda were already there, Garrus busy setting up the tower which would direct the anti-aircraft guns which were scattered over the colony settlement. Shepherd contacted the Normandy.

"Sweet signal," quipped Joker.

"Commander I will be able to reformat the guns and power them up," said EDI, "But it will take time and I will not be able to mask the power surge."

"That means that the Collectors will try to stop us," chuckled Grunt. "Good."

Tali could see nothing good in that.

"You are such a Krogan, Grunt," was her opinion.

"Yeah," he replied with one of those massive toothy grins.

"Everyone, form a barricade around the control tower, we stand here!" snapped John.

It was chiefly Grunt who did the moving, but over the next five minutes the team managed to pulled most of the crates and gear into a rough circular ring around the control tower giving them decent cover. Against a determined attack it would not last long, but they didn't need hours, they only needed minutes.

And the Collectors came in swarms.

Mordin's application of smoke grenades encouraged the collectors to either bunch up so they could direct fire at the team or push through the smoke and become outlined against it, making them single targets vulnerable to direct fire. Of course you can defeat such a tactic as that easily if you happen to have a commander who is patient. You simply pick your own cover, shoot when you can see, go back into cover when you can not so your shields recover, lather, rinse, repeat. Because sooner or later, even a Salarian Special Opts Scientist runs out of grenades to throw. But the Collectors were not particularly skilled at small unit tactics and so they either bunched up to concentrate fire, or charged through singly. The husks were no better, they charged through until they encountered the barricades and then wasted valuable time trying to go around them and when that failed simply tried to climb over them which merely guaranteed a more through killing by the team.

When it became apparent to the Collector commander that this was not working, he concluded that what he needed were more Collectors and more Husks, and himself.

Tali did not know what it was. It looked like a flying bug, it was big, ugly, black, and it was talking.

"Shepherd," it said in a voice that reminded her of Sovereign's. "You will know pain. You will know agony. You will know defeat."

That voice echoed all over the battlefield.

"My attacks will tear you apart," it suggested.

"Trouble," observed Mordin behind her.

"You cannot resist," it insisted.

"What the hell is that thing!" shouted Grunt. "How many bullets do I get to fill it with?"

"Your form is fragile," it observed.

"My mother told me there would be days like this," suggested Jacob.

"We are your genetic destiny," it proclaimed.

"Spirits," groaned Garrus. "Could I even manage to miss that thing blindfolded?"

"Prepare to be destroyed," it announced.

"This is going to ruin my afternoon," replied Miranda.

"All guns on my 12," came Shepherd's orders. And then he stood up and jumped up on the raised platform he had been behind. And then facing the creature with his arms spread wide he shouted at the top of his lungs.

"I'm Commander John Michael Shepherd and I say you are a big black fat ugly flying BASTARD!"

The big black thing focused upon him, it unleashed it's energy beams at him. It charged. That was it's first mistake on the battlefield. And as is so often, also it's last.

"We are your genetic destiny. Shepherd you will know pa . . ." was what it said before it's body suffered too much bullet damage for it's vocal chords to continue being operational. It fell into a messy heap ten yards from John. And what was left of the Collectors fled as what was left of John' shields recharged.

And EDI finished powering up the anti-aircraft batteries who began reporting and pounding the Collector ship, itself which powered up and lifted off.

"I can't believe it," groaned Shepherd. "I simply can not believe it."

"Yahn? What?"

John looked at Tali and smiled. "We get to fight a genuine all earth Evil Overlord."

"I remember," mused Garrus. "That talk . . . hard to believe that when we heard that thing talking it was just as you observed back before Ilos. After that talk Commander, you had me so curious I started reading all that 'pulp' literature you had been referencing online. And you were right, so much of what that thing just said, you would have thought it was reading campy kids comic books out loud to us."

"Will someone please explain to me what the hell you are laughing about?" asked Miranda.

"Observations we made about the Reapers back when we were chasing Saren," explained Garrus.

The colonists were beginning to come out or come to, and the fear and anxiety of survivors began to manifest itself. Mothers were looking for children, children were crying for their fathers, brothers desperately seeking little sisters, and friends calling out for each other. Each one hoping against hope that one of those whom they loved or cared for had not been taken.

Team Shepherd sobered up. John looked up at the sky.

"Flew to the moon," he whispered.

Suddenly Tali jumped.

"Kaiden!" she cried as she dashed towards him, her arms out to give him a hug.

"Back off Tali!" Kaiden snapped.

Tali staggered as if hit by a rifle.

"Garrus too?" Kaiden snapped. "What the hell has happened? Has everyone decided to sell out?"

"Kaiden?" asked John quietly walking up.

"Kaiden!" whimpered Tali. "We were friends. We cared about each other. We were there for each other. Why do you hate me?"

"Cerberus," spat Kaiden.

He turned to Shepherd, his anger almost palpable.

"I should have recognized the signs," he shouted. "I should have realized you'd sell us out, when you left Ashley to die!"

"Yahn cried when Ashley died!" shouted Tali back. "Yahn has always loved each and every one of us!"

John simply stood there and let Kaiden vent.

"It is the price of leaving oneself open to judgement,  
by those limited by their time, place, and circumstance."

"Was your damned body merely an inflatable dummy?" continued Kaiden. "Was your funeral faked with your little Quarian crying crocodile tears? Was Garrus standing so still at your coffin trying to hide his smirks? What the hell happened, Commander? I thought you were a good man!"

To be accused of crying crocodile tears was more than shocking to Tali. She just stood there and trembled in anger and broken heartedness. A dear friend whom she had not seen in years who had stood with her through so much pain had just accused her of betraying him. She began to quietly cry.

"Kaiden!" began John. "You know me. You know I'd only be doing this for the right reason. Colonists are vanishing. The Reapers are on the move with a new plan. The Alliance is not doing anything. Cerberus is. I have to work with them if I have any chance to make a difference. You can see Garrus here. And Tali for the love of God. Are you ready to condemn her as well?"

"It's all a pile of crap," replied Kaiden. "I know Cerberus. I shot at Cerberus. We both saw what they were doing. For humanity? At What Cost? You turned your back on everything we fought for! What the hell did Cerberus do to you to make you do this? I'm leaving now. I'm going back to the Alliance, because I'm an Alliance soldier. If they believe your story, I'll see. Until then, out of here."

And Kaiden walked away while John placed his arm around Tali and let her lean on him as she quietly wept. Then Garrus put his arm around Tali as well. It enabled him to come in contact with Shepherd as well. The three of them found the mutual contact calming.

"I can understand him being angry at you," said Garrus quietly. "Because there is only one of you. Anyone can be a fool on occasion. But there were the three of us. Nearly all of his old team. How could he not believe the three of us?"

"He held me when I was hating drill. I held him when he was grieving Ashley. How can he yust . . ."

"I'm sorry Tali. Time has passed. He doesn't know the whole story."

John flipped on his Comm-link.

"Joker? Get us off this damned rock."

Twenty minutes of sweet and tangy kisses. Twenty minutes of taking comfort after loss and grief. Twenty minutes of having someone to hold on to when the world had lurched so hard. John and Tali had each other for times like this. The twenty minutes passed, and once again, in her helmet, she snuggled up to the crook of his arm as they turned off the lights to the cabin and prepared to sleep.

"I'm going to do something special for the crew tomorrow night, but I'm going to need your help, Kitten," he said.

"What do you want me to do, Yahn?"

"I want you to find an old classic movie vid I think will help enlighten the crew about what we are up against. I need it downloaded and prepared for projection on the crew deck display wall."

"What movie vid are you talking about?"

"And old American classic, The Wizard of Oz. It was a children's book written at the turn of the 20th century and was penned to be America's first original fairy tale. Turned out to be the only one. First book was the best, and the movie was, rather ironically, even better."

"Shouldn't be too tough," mused Tali.

"And then . . . some secret stuff," whispered John.

"You can't tell me?"

"Of course I can tell you," replied John, rubbing his finger over her face plate filter. "But you can't tell any one else."

"Not even the author?"

"Not even him."

"Okay" she whispered back and giggled.

And leaning their heads in close, they whispered their secret stuff plans for the next few moments before they got quiet and fell asleep.

The Illusive Man encouraged John at the next morning meeting. He pointed out that while the Collectors had taken half the colonists on Horizon, Team Shepherd had saved the other half. More recommends for team members were coming. But John was going to have to leave old relationships behind, he was going to have to forget Kaiden. John was not happy about that. But as it was pointed out again, and again, there was a good chance this was going to be a one way trip. Everyone had to be fully committed.

John turned away from the communique. He turned to Jacob who said, "Looks like it's really gonna happen. The Omega 4 Relay."

"Looks like it," said John. "But I don't know what it will accomplish. Taking the fight to the Collector's home world?"

"Tim's gotta know what he's doing," argued Jacob. "He's not going to spend his money to send us on a no success job."

"Deliberately," clarified John. "He's not omniscient."

"I'm going to have to do some serious thinking here . . . Think about getting some closure on things," pondered Jacob. "Mother told me that I'd have to think about dying sooner or later and if I didn't it would be too late to do anything about it."

"Tell me about it," chuckled John.

"Yeah, I guess you would know all about that."

"See you at the movie tonight," said John.

"Like, this is mandatory?"

"You are under orders to have fun, eat potato chips, and be entertained with really good musical melodies," replied John. "Trust me Jacob, there's a method to my madness."

"Very good Commander."

Kasumi was in the lounge, where she had set up her own little bedroom. She liked looking out of the windows. She liked talking to people and 'teasing' them a little. Teasing meaning stealing little things for about an hour or two, waiting for people to miss them, and then either producing them claiming she had just found them on the floor or slipping them back to their old places and siting in the corner cloaked waiting for the expressions on their faces when they found them again. She was careful to not take anything valuable, but she suspected she purloined some sentimental items which were very meaningful to her victims. Those she felt a tad guilty over, but she always returned them. After all, if word got out that there was a real thief on the ship how long would she remain above suspicion?

Tali walked in.

"Yusekoo," she said to Kasumi. Yusee was Khelish for hood, and Yusekoo meant an endearing sort of hood, like a hoody, or sweet little hood, or cute hood.

"Chou chou," replied Kasumi, which was Japanese for butterfly.

"Coming to the movie tonight?" asked Tali.

"We have a choice?"

Tali giggled. "I guess not. Yahn seems to think we all need to see it in order to understand what our enemy is really like, or something like that. It's a surprise really.

Kasumi sighed.

"I don't know about this Chou chou," she said. "I don't like all this drill stuff Shepherd is putting everyone through. I have a pretty good idea he wants me next. I don't like being yelled at, and I'm not the sort to take orders. I do things my own way.

"I didn't like it either," said Tali. "I hated him by the end of the first day. I thought I was going to be killed by Saren by the third day. And it was only at the end of our first few missions that I realized he had been doing it to save our lives. It's why you haven't been yoining us. He does not want you to get killed."

"I've been just fine so far," replied Kasumi. "I did just fine with Hock. I did just fine on my own. All he needed to do was bring me along and he have seen for himself."

She stared out at the window.

"I'm thinking I'm going to 'resign' when we reach the citadel. Head on out and do my own thing again."

"Yusekoo, who will I have to talk to? Who will I have to do girl things with? You're my best friend on the Normandy. You're my only girl friend on the Normandy."

"You'll find somebody," assured Kasumi. "I call you Chou chou because you're always flitting about and happy. Someone will come along you'll see."

"No," said Tali shaking her head. "I've seen the dossiers which Tim has sent us, there will be no more girls like you. Just some old Asari woman yustice thing or another. We might meet up with Liara, Yahn is hoping she'll yoin us."

"See? That proves it!"

Tali looked at Kasumi, and Kasumi read concern in Tali's body language.

"There's something else you've seen," suggested Kasumi.

"Tim," said Tali. "Tim has got a very long record on you. Yahn is afraid if you leave, Tim will turn on you."

"I can easily avoid Tim," replied Kasumi with a wave of her hand.

"Even if all sorts of crimes are attributed to you?" asked Tali. "Even one's you didn't commit?"

"What do you mean?"

"It's like you said yourself Yusekoo, you're the best thief, not the most famous. Tim plans on making you the most famous if you leave."

Kasumi leaned against the wall.

"Why are you telling me this Chou chou?"

Tali sighed. "I was going to have to tell you sooner or later. But it's kind of hard to tell that sort of thing to your only girl friend. I could have kept my mouth shut, said goodbye to you and trusted you would know how to handle yourself when Tim started giving out all your vital stats to the law enforcement agencies. And letting you think I had given that information out once you had left. Or, I could risk you thinking I was trying to threaten you now by telling you."

"What made you think I would conclude either?"

"Kaiden accused me of selling out to Cerberus. Now he hates me. I don't want to lose another friend."

Kasumi was quiet for a moment.

"Stupid of me to trust Cerberus," she said.

"Yahn doesn't trust him at all. We keep finding bugs and listening devices all over the ship. In fact when you were telling Yahn about that girl you rescued and that bust you replace at the museum, that all went into Tim's file on you. Even your Rose calling card when you first started out, and the books you have? Once you got on the Normandy, everything started to be known by Tim."

"Why are you telling me this now? If this room is so bugged?"

"We didn't know, Then we found out. Then we found out how extensive. I think we've gotten rid of them all. Mordin and I have run around the whole ship a dozen times. We keep finding new one's, but we're also trying to make sure some bugs are 'not found'."

"Why not?"

"Don't want Tim to see all his information dry up," said Tali. "Yahn and I talked about it a lot. So all the bugs in the dining area, Miranda's office, and the pilot's chair we've left. Also all the bugs on the outside of the ship."

"Never thought I would walk into a trap," sighed Kasumi. "Always figured I was the smart one."

"You were Yusekoo," said Tali. "It's just that while a police force can only spend a few thousand credits in labor to track down a theft you performed, Tim can spend a million. No one can escape that level of vigilance."

"I've been thinking about it Yusekoo, and I hope you don't take this as an insult, but we really don't need a thief for what we are going to do with the Collectors. I think we were bait, to lure you to us, so Tim could blackmail you into working for him. So that when the mission was done, he would be able to pull you in bit by bit until you were exclusively a Cerberus tool."

Kasumi was angry. She began to pace the floor. Suddenly she let out a scream and slammed her palm down on the table so hard Tali could see it vibrate.

"Chou chou," she said. "I could conclude you are behind this blackmail scheme, but I won't. I won't because everything you say makes sense. I keep my eyes and ears open, I hear people talking. I just kept thinking that this stuff was for the crew, that I was different, that Tim would respect me and what I did as a profession. You told me Shepherd was thinking about making me stealth recon, but Garrus does that already, and what am I going to do? Spot for him? That's not my style."

Tali was quiet.

"So I guess my only option right now is to play along, until the mission is over with, and then get the hell out of Cerberus's way," she concluded. "At least that will give me time to plan my escape route."

Tali gave her a hug.

"At least you will have a friend, and I'll be in drill with you every day, okay?"

"Chou chou? Do you um . . . never mind, of course you don't, but given how Shepherd drills, I can't help but wonder."

Tali left and returned to her and Shepherd's cabin. She looked at her omni-tool. There was an hour before the movie. She fed the fish, watched them swim a bit, and then sent a little note asking John to come up to the cabin for a 'consultation'.

"EDI?" she asked.

"Tali?" responded EDI.

"Forget everything you see and hear in this room for the next 24 hours," she said.

"Very well Tali, shall I inform you when the time is up?"

"No, I'll let you know."

Tali didn't like EDI, but at least EDI was willing to cooperate on some level. Or so Tali hoped.

John came in.

"Tali Duck?"

"I had a talk with Yusekoo. I think I persuaded her to start drill tomorrow."

"How did you do that?" asked John. His expression suggested he was pleasantly surprised.

"I think I kind of mentioned the possibility that Tim was collecting information on her in order to force her into a more deep involvement with Cerberus."

John paused for a moment.

"Tali you know we are not sure of that yet. It's only a possibility."

"I know, and you know, but she didn't. And it made perfect sense to her."

John looked at her.

"Is it . . . okay?" she asked rubbing her palms together.

"You are a cruel and wicked Quarian," suggested John with a grin.

"But you're okay with that," giggled Tali.

And shortly thereafter, she was in the crook of his arm listening to a classic character actress, in the black garb of a witch, point a thin crooked finger at an innocent looking Dorothy saying "I'll get you my pretty. You and your little dog Toto too!"


	14. Chapter 14 - Summer In Illium

Illium, the bright and shining Asari port to the Terminus systems. Illium, the center of culture, arts, and commerce. Illium, where even slaves had a nice name. Illium, where a single signature on a single line could make you bleed forever. Illium, the new home of Liara T'Soni, who they were about to meet again since the destruction of the old Normandy.

"Perfectly safe," warned Garrus as the team walked out of the Normandy. "Until you fall off the grid."

Tali looked at Kasumi, who nodded back and cloaked.

It was Kasumi's first mission trip with the team. She had passed drill. It had been a hard two weeks for her, but true to her word, Tali had stood by her the whole time and she and John had agreed that there would be no holds barred. And sure enough John started cutting Tali some slack. And Tali was ready. She accidentally on purpose forgot to unload her shot gun and with the perfect timing that comes from planning an accident, fired off her shot gun into the ceiling during a complex set of moves, and John was all over her like the Drill Sargent she had grown to loath and hate back on the old Normandy.

And then when she arrived at the cabin at 2100 hours, she was likewise all over him, once she had taken the time to remove helmet, gloves, and boots. She was up to two hours each evening and she wanted to be able to look at him directly in the face. It was a fight for the records. He screamed and shouted at her angrily that she had deliberately done something that catastrophic in the ship in space and she came right back at him reminding him that as a drill sergeant he could not let her off the hook and had he been everything he was supposed to be she wouldn't have had to do something that radical. There were accusations of betrayal, pointed observations about safety standards, fingers wagged in the face, and the climax came when John once again shouted out that he loved her too much to want to yell at her (the irony of the situation was entirely lost on both of them given the emotions) and she punched him in the arm and shouted back the suggestion that maybe now he could find the motivation?

It took three more arm punches before John finally unleashed and Tali just stood there and took the verbal barrage. Then he finally sat down and sighed.

Meanwhile, back at the Pilot's chair, the dozen or so crew members who had been listening to EDI's blow by blow description of the fight, counted up the insults exchanged by the two - kept meticulously by Joker on a scrap piece of paper - and exchanged money from the bets made regarding the predictions made as to the final score. The ventilation system had clued Joker in on the fight, but it had taken EDI's ringside seat reporting to get the full and clear picture, which she had provided once Joker had asked her for the details. EDI, thanks to some unexplored protocols which she was as of yet unable to fully examine due to Cerberus blocks, possessed that innate sense of discretion to know that she could not leave Tali and John any clues as to her presence in the room during the fight. It had definitely been a tight race at the beginning until John had tapped into his inner Drill Sargent. And then Tali had gone silent and John's score had shot way ahead.

"It really wasn't a contest," observed Joker as he collected his share of the winnings. "I mean sooner or later Tali was bound to run out of insults and the Commander has had years of training to come up with his extensive collection of put downs."

John was exhausted. It had been six hours of drill with Tali, Kasumi, and the rest of the team since Kasumi now had to be meshed. And to top it off he had just participated in the first knock down drag out fight with the woman he loved. He looked up at her wearily and found her there, barefoot, balled fists on hips, leaning slightly forward and a frown upon her face.

And even then she still looked pretty. John thought about that for a moment.

"I have to really be in love with you," he observed.

"How do you figure that?"

"You still look cute. Even with that frowny face. Can we kiss and make up now?"

"Are you going to treat me like a soldier tomorrow at drill? Refuse to cut me slack?"

John sighed. It looked as if the fight were about to start all over again.

"Yahn, if you really love me you know that if you let me off the hook during training I'm more likely to make a mistake on the field and then I die. Do you really want me to be a casualty? You say you worry, but why won't you act like it when we're in training? The rumors that are going around the ship, every day it seems like Kenneth or Gabby come up and ask me what we know about this Omega 4 Relay and is it true we're not likely to come back? If it's that dangerous what are the odds that I won't come back?"

"It hurts when I scream at you!" he argued. "I remember how you trembled. I remember the tears that came down your cheeks back then. I remember and I never want to do that to you again!"

"You think you have a monopoly on pain from your loved one?" cried Tali. "Can you imayine, seeing your face, up close like it was back on the old Normandy, with your capillaries starting to bleed from your shouting? Do you know how much it hurts to see the man you were kissing just 12 hours prior, the man who makes your body ache with desire, screaming his damned fool head off at you because you did something you shouldn't have?"

"Then why are you even there? You passed back on the old Normandy! You only have to show up for meshing and that isn't a problem."

"Because I love you so damn much I want to live another day and be with you okay? And besides, Kasumi is my only girl friend I've got right now because Liara is not with us and Tim has told you he doesn't trust her which means we're very unlikely to get her back. I want Yusekoo to get through this and know if I'm there it will help."

She was right . . . again. It all made so much sense. If he really loved her, if he really wanted her to live through this, she would have to be the best. And it was his responsibility to see to it that she was the best. And like a doctor operating on his daughter, cutting her skin, seeing her bleed, looking for the vessel that needed the stint, he had to make it right knowing it was going to hurt like hell. Because this was how you saved lives.

"I'm so sorry Tali Duck," he sighed. "You're so right. You're the only thing that's keeping me going right now, and here I am trying to protect you from the wrong things."

She sighed, looked at him for a second, quietly walked over to him, sat next to him, and snuggled up to him. They sighed together for a moment. Then they looked into each other's eyes. She smiled a little. He smiled back. She sat on his lap, nuzzled him under the neck. Looked back up at him with her little incisors nibbling on her lower lip.

And then she was once again all over him, but in an entirely different manner and entirely different context.

"Chou chou," came mischievous and teasing Kasumi voice over the com. "How would you like one thousand shares of Exo-geni stock?"

"Can you afford that Yusekoo?" asked Tali.

"Chou chou?" came Kasumi's voice with a playful annoyed tone. "Why go through all the legal hassles of coming up with money and signing contracts when I can just hack into this terminal here and make the transfer?"

"But then I'll be the one who has to explain it when the Asari Security comes up and asks me how I managed to acquire it, and me without the right paperwork!"

"Oooo, yeah," continued Kasumi's voice being just as playful as before. "Better think of something better to get you. . . like chocolate!"

"Now you're fighting dirty, Yusekoo!" playfully whimpered Tali.

Liara's assistant had been there to greet them at the front of her office, and the team was led right in. Then they stood there for a second while Liara, facing a holograph of some wealthy human, threatened a strike force of Asari Commandos and biotic shredding of brains if payment was not forthcoming.

Then she turned, saw the team, and smiled one of her sweet little smiles and gave Garrus, Shepherd, and Tali hugs.

"Our sweet little recon spotter has gotten scary as of late," suggested Garrus.

Tali on the other hand, placed a territorial hold on John's arm once hugs were distributed.

"My sources said Project Lazarus was successful," she said looking at Miranda and nodding.

"It's good to see you." she said as she turned to face Shepherd.

"So you've been getting yourself established then," observed John. "Nice to see you put Team Specter's talents to good civilian use, Liara. An information broker with sources."

"Sources, Contacts," she observed. "Even hired muscle."

"Hired muscle," said Garrus. "You are a scary girl these days."

"It's paid the bills. Given me a career for the past two years. And now you're going for the Collectors, under the aegis of Cerberus."

"And you know I could use your help," suggested Shepherd.

"I can't Shepherd. I'm sorry. I have commitments here."

"I know Liara. And if you had dropped everything here to come with us I would have worried about your level of commitment. But I wanted to invite you anyway so you would know I would if you could."

"It was sweet of you to offer," she answered. "And even if I had no obligations, I still could not go. There is something I need to take care of here."

"What sort of something," asked Shepherd. "Are you in trouble?"

"No, no trouble," she said. "I have debts to replay for things which have happened since you . . . died." She seemed to think for a moment. "Listen," she said. "How about a favor for a favor?"

"Okay," said Shepherd.

"I need someone I can trust who knows how to hack into a system."

"Oh that could be taken care of," suggested Tali. "What are you looking for?"

"If you could disable key security points around Illium, you could get me information I need."

"Regarding what?" asked John. "I can't just run off with trade secrets and things like that. Talk to me Liara."

"I want to Shepherd. But this is Illium. Anything I say could be recorded. Trust me and I won't let you down."

Shepherd nodded. "We'll do it for you Liara."

Liara gave some quick notes as to what keywords would be needed for the information. John turned to Tali who nodded.

"Yusekoo?"

"Chou chou!"

"You heard?"

"On it, this will be fun."

The team fanned out through the open air plaza where shops and terminals dotted the vistas. There were shops to buy cute things, shops to buy not so cute things, shops which sold things which said "I own you" and shops which sold things that said, "Look at me I'm pretty!"

And then there were the shops which sold the cool stuff, like model ships. John vanished for a bit.

Tali happily walked around the plaza, talking now to Garrus, talking now to Jacob, and then chatting with Mordin who was busy running tests on some of the local bugs he had found in the corners of the plaza. Then she would stop, check her omni-tool, and transfer more data to Liara's office based on what she was receiving from Kasumi.

A couple of hours later, Kasumi showed up by Tali as she was leaning against a balcony rail looking over the skyline.

"Done," she said.

Tali made some adjustments on her Omni-tool. Then she scanned the plaza for John. Mordin was over in the corner. Looking at yet another bug which he was holding in one hand while scanning with his omni-tool with the other. Then, much to her surprise, he popped the bug into his mouth and ate it.

Kasumi was amused. "You didn't know Salarians ate bugs?" she asked.

"No?"

"Oh yes, all the time, they even eat some types of earth insects. Mordin in particular told me he was very fond of spiders," continued Kasumi.

Tali didn't look particularly pale, because she had her helmet on. But her body language was not showing high levels of stress just yet so Kasumi proceeded.

"Spider are a delicacy south of Japan," she continued. "In Malaysia they have spider hunts, looking for the big ones which they roast on an open fire pit. Of course it's amazing how big they get in some parts. They aren't that large in Japan but in the American Midwest, the wolf spider's bodies get a big as mice and the prairie spiders spin webs so wide and strong that when you run into them the webs actually snap.

Suddenly Tali lept into the air and madly waved her arms and kicked her feet.

"You okay?" asked Kasumi.

"I don't . . . like . . . spiders," offered Tali.

John walked up and handed Tali a nicely decorated box.

"I saw this and thought of you," he said.

Tali looked at it. It was a box of dextro-chocolate with mushi nuts.

"Oh, Yahn," she said as she took the box. She gave it a little hug as she looked at him.

"Ooo, that's a fancy box too," offered Kasumi.

"Absolutely amazing the quality of the insect life here commander," added Mordin walking up. "I have categorized a total of sixteen separate species so far and even found this species which originally came from earth, but look at how big it's grown!"

Mordin presented to the team, dangling from his hand in front of his face, a fuzzy jumping spider which possessed a full inch leg span, normally four times the size of the type found on earth, exactly six inches from Tali's visor.

And that was how Mordin got a face full of crushed jumping spider, dextro-chocolate, mushi nuts, with the crumpled remnants of a highly decorated box thrown in for good measure.

Kasumi dashed off to retrieve a panicked Tali while Commander Shepherd helped Mordin up.

"Arachnophobia common phenomena must make notes on it Tali's response was strong and . . ." He paused for a moment. "Chocolatey."

"And I spent fifteen minutes trying to decide which box to get her too," sighed John.

Now that the data Liara had been looking for had been hacked and transferred, the team returned to her office where Liara thanked John and informed him that she would be visiting the team on the Normandy. There she could give the full explanation as to what the team had just done. And thanks to a subtle hint from John, she brought a box of dextro-chocolate with mushi nuts as a thank you present for Tali's work on the project.

And for a couple of hours, it was almost like it had been old times. Liara and Tali and Garrus were seated together across from John and Joker. She elaborated on her prior two years of history, starting with her chief goal, that of tracking down the Shadow Broker. Apparently something had happened to make her determined to remove him.

"With this data I am one step closer to taking down the Shadow Broker," she said, slapping her palm on the table.

"I've never seen you this determined to take someone out," mused John. "Just what did the Shadow Broker do to you?"

"I was on a job with a friend," she explained. "Agents of the Shadow Broker caught us, but my friend did not escape. I don't know if he's alive or dead, if he's being held or interrogated, but I need to find him. I owe him my life. I can't do that here on the Normandy."

John nodded.

"Going to miss you old girl," said Garrus.

"But there are some things you can help us with," suggested John.

"Such as?" replied Liara.

"Thane Krios," began John. "An Assassin. Do you know of him?"

Liara nodded. "The rumor has that he's got a target here in the city that he's stalking."

And for the next forty-five minutes they huddled together around the table and gathered up all the bits of information they could find. Tali did not add much to the conversation, but she did nibble on some of the chocolate which Liara had brought. It was still sort of like old times, and the chocolate helped her remember Christmas. She had not had a Christmas since, and it was only July 7th. But if Mordin's schedule for acclimation held, she would be full bonded with Shepherd for the next Christmas. She briefly played around with the idea of wrapping herself up as a Christmas present for him, but decided it might be more fun if he wrapped himself up. Then it dawned on her that they might be dead by that point anyway, and spend the next five minutes sad about that. Then she had another piece of chocolate and it was all better.

The team moved out to secure Thane the next evening, based on Liara's information. The newest member of the team, Kasumi, was put on the left flank as recon and she performed admirably. Their opponents were Eclipse Mercs who, like other Merc units, were individually good, but poor on small team tactics. Likewise, Eclipse persistently had a bad habit of fleshing out it's ranks with mech security units. While perfectly capable shooting down civilians, they were poor soldiers against a well trained team. John had no issues with shooting down the Mercs who offered resistance, especially after he saw them methodically shooting the Salarian workers who's chief failure was to leave on time. Garrus in particular made more than a few references to Omega. He had seen that behavior there as well. They finally reached Nassana, who tried to buy them off, and then were treated to a ringside seat in her assassination as Thane came in and finished her off.

Thane turned out to possess a curious personality. He was a gentleman, polite, and pious. He saw himself as a weapon which was wielded by others, and thus did not regard himself as particularly at fault for all those whom he had killed. But at the same time, he possessed a conscious of sorts and was looking for ways of atoning. Saving human colonists from being rounded by by Collectors appealed to him in the same fashion that the assassination of Nassana for her routine slaughter of innocents had appealed to him.

Shepherd found it fascinating that Tim was once again securing the employment of aliens. For Thane was a Drell, a reptilian race who's own planet had suffered a collapsed ecosystem just a few decades prior. The other fascinating thing about the Drell was that they had a perfect memory. But what was perhaps best was that Thane was a skilled sniper, a perfect pair with Kasumi, and he had no issues with going through N7 drill. Once again John could put off Jack.

Kelly was now responsible for talking with Jack. She tried to spend what time she could with Jack, working on resolving all the issues. It was not apparently easy. Jack was in essence, psychologically stuck and there was little Kelly could do on a day to day basis. John himself knew he couldn't spend much time working with her either. It kept going back to Jack having a sexual relationship with him and it didn't matter how much John reminded her that he was engaged to marry Tali. Jack, having no friends in her life, having no memories of her family, simply could not connect with loyalty, friendship, or devotion. Other people were tools and the best that could be expected was mutual using. The idea that he would say no based on his love for Tali was so alien to her thinking that she simply dismissed it. And of course the more John unburdened his frustrations with Jack on Tali, the more Tali joined Grunt for target practice. And John could not just stop talking about Jack to Tali. Tali was becoming more and more his anchor in the way he was for her. Each one had their own fears and insecurities which the other did not and for that reason, there was always the 'hold me against the scary stuff quality' to their relationship. Everything that was going through John's head, he related to Tali, and she listened and kissed his pains to make them better. And in return, he saw to it that no spiders crawled into their room . . . among other things.

The days on Illium passed by with a mixture of sweet and bitter. Eventually memories would sponge out the hard and keep the soft and so John and Tali would refer to those six weeks as Their Summer In Illium. There were nights that John and Tali would go out to restaurants that Liara had recommended. There were a few shopping trips. There was the party for the whole crew and old gang which was held under the stars on a wide plaza. For the party they had hired an excellent band and Tali found that John could not dance to save his life. She quite forgave him since he only had one set of knees and rigid feet. And he insisted on going out on the dance floor anyway so she did not have to dance alone, and 'invented' what the crew affectionately called, The Shepherd Shuffle. Of course Tali had her own dance style, which was - as anyone might have guessed - rather bouncy and outrageously cute, but likewise she was even more flexible than Liara's limber and far more sensual Asari style. But Garrus stole the show, taking Liara in his arms and doing not only a perfect rendition of the ancient Tango, but taught Liara the steps while doing it. The dance floor was filled with "ooh's" and "ah's" and a very enthusiastic round of applause as Garrus acknowledged his handiwork and Liara, immensely flattered, held his hand for a bit more. Tali leaned against John after that and sighed.

"Well I supposed I can't have everything in a guy," she concluded.

"I love you too," sighed John in response.

"Oh I'm sorry Yahn, I'm being selfish again," she apologized.

There was yet another Alien to track down, an Asari Justicar by the name of Samara, and then Miranda had her own crises. Her sister, also genetically constructed by her father, and rescued by Miranda and sent to a family which had raised her as their own, had been found by her father who had traced them to Illium. Eclipse was doing the dirty work on both issues. Before it was over with, John had a new team member, uncovered several layers of corruption throughout Illium, received a message from the Rachni queen he had saved back on Noveria, was caught up on the recovery of Zhu's Hope on Feros, and earned the gratitude of Miranda who was now increasingly demonstrating a level of trust in Shepherd's decisions.

Then there were the hours meshing Thane and Samara into the team. Tali continued to show up at every drill session, but John always checked her shot gun and pistol to make sure they were unloaded. Then one day, he proceeded to methodically check her suit in case she had slipped some ammo into some back pocket.

"I don't know why you bother," teased Tali that night as she was cuddled up to him in bed after the lights had been turned out. "It's not that I can't do something to guarantee that I could have ammo on me in drill to load up my shotgun."

"Oh?" asked John, slightly seriously. "And how is that."

"I have a secret pocket," she said guiding his hand. "Right here."

And put it in the one spot she knew he would never publicly touch.

"You are a cruel and wicked tease," replied John, gently moving the hand away.

"And that little pressure from the wiggling fingers was entirely unintentional?" she replied with a little smile.

Each night on the Normandy during those six weeks, Tali got another five minutes added to her helmet off time. It had been a couple of months since they had dropped the routine of kissing non-stop when she was out of her helmet. Now there were little pecks, the occasional fifteen minute session, but most of the time, Tali was at her desk working on circuitry and John was at his desk building a model ship. There was passing affection and talking about the day. Tali's voice was a soft alto outside of her helmet. There wasn't the chirping quality which the helmet added. And often it was just John listening to Tali who always had more to say on the day than he did.

But with the Normandy in dock, there came a point when there simply was no more that could be done to upgrade the engines. There was no more maintenance that had to be done which was not automated. And there was no more upgrading the automatic functions to be done either. And Tali began to get bored. So she starting looking over John's shoulders while he put together his latest model ship, and then, she started making suggestions.

By the end of two nights later, they were both at the same desk working on the model. It wasn't as romantic as it might have been, for Tali was territorial on her prerogatives and accordingly, she didn't do what John told her to do when it came to, for example, attaching the engine to the hull, she did what she thought ought to be done. John could not argue for the most part because Tali knew engineering, and the construction of ship models, especially the elaborate and complex tiny metal plate by tiny metal plate ones he preferred, was simply a piece of cake for her. Her skill at rendering detail was superior to his.

So over the next week they divided duties and proceeded to work on the model together. Then Tali showed up one night with a small circuit board and a tiny piece of element zero.

"Tali?" asked John as she took out the first ship model he had built, that being of the Normandy itself, and began to dismantle the hull.

"I'm a Quarian Enyineer," she said proudly. "Give me some scrap metal, element zero, and a circuit board and I'll have it making precision yumps."

And sure enough, at the end of the session, with John watching in amazement, his rendition of the Normandy was hovering in the room and silently gliding from one spot to another by the instructions of Tali's omni-tool.

Then John had his own idea. It started with him coming into the room with Tali once again struggling to learn how to play the piano, and instrument which had been designed for four fingers and opposable thumb while she had only two fingers and thumb.

"Okay Monkey Duck, when life throws you lemons, or just one pair of fingers, you make lemonade . . . or chopsticks," he said sitting down next to her on the piano. "Take one finger from each hand, like this," and he placed her right front finger on the G note "And the other finger here," and placed that on the F note. "Now play them together," he finished.

Tali plunked both notes simultaneously several times until John told her that in this song, she had to play those two notes six times together. Then of course he moved her left hand front finger to the E note and she played them six times, and then moved her fingers to the F and B, and then to the E and C, and so on. She was a fast learner, and so once she had gotten the whole thing down, he began to accompany her with the other part of the melody. Soon enough she was bouncing and humming along as they did it several times together.

She gave him an awful lot of kisses after that.

From that point on, he made it a habit of finding music which could be played by two people as a duet, with one of them being single fingered. There was more of it than he had guessed since there was always a demand for music which little children could master with their mothers or fathers playing with them. It never was a persistent thing with them, but every so often over those six weeks, it was something they did together which Tali enjoyed because at least she could do something on that piano which John had been so hung up over.

Then, the last of their issues were wrapped up. It was time to leave. John took Joker, Karin, Tali, and Garrus out for a final farewell dinner with Liara. It was an evening for recollection, the so called good old days when everything seemed simple enough. Now they were looking up at the sky of Illium and everything seemed so vibrant and energetic. There was a sense of permanency to it all. The illusion that everything was always going to be this way. And every last one of them knew that there was up in that vast black sea of night, a threat which hovered over them like the mythical sword of Damocles. But the wine was good, the food was exquisite, the company most genial, and there was hardly a look up at the night sky so filled with threats. There was Muskwin and Brandy for Garrus and Tali, and Wine and Beer for the rest. Liara preferred the wine, but after Joker insisted, she had a mug of one of the local beers on tap and agreed that it was nice. Kaiden was missed in that there were no songs sung, and he was always the one who came up with the appropriate ones. And there was a toast to the memory of Ashley as well.

And since she knew that John was there for her, Tali enjoyed getting more than a little inebriated and she leaned on John all the way back to the Normandy.

But when they got back to the cabin, John was reminded just how flirty Tali could get when she was drunk. She half-sat half fell onto the bed and lifted up one foot for him to remove her boot. And then the other foot. She removed her visor and pulled off her little braided copper ring, then presented her hands for him to de-glove. Last came the hood. And she stretched out full on her back on the bed with her arms over her head and looked at him.

"Is that all?" she asked with a flirty drunken slur.

"What do you mean that's all?"

"I'm still in my suit," she suggested. Then she hiccuped.

"You're supposed to stay in your suit, you only get a few hours with your head out."

"So I get a little fever, I get to wrap myself around my romantic and wonderful boyfriend. We become bonded (hics). Totally worth it."

"Dr. Mordin says . . ."

"Dr. Mordin is a yerk who dangles icky spiders in my face. Take off my suit. And make love to me," and then she giggled and curled her toes on the bedspread, bunching it up a bit.

John exhaled. This was getting really difficult. She was looking cute as usual, but there was a really sexy edge to it which was beginning to work on him. It was hard enough keeping himself under control when she was sober. But at least she understood that there was such a thing as being too much of a tease and she watched herself as well. But now she wasn't watching herself at all, and she was playing with fire.

"You're not romantic enough," she grumbled. "Gonna have to do this myself and drag you into it," she concluded and began unlatching the neck seals.

John knew he had to move fast, but for a brief moment he hesitated. He really wanted to see her remove that suit. Her neck pieces were suddenly off and she was loosening everything around her shoulders.

"No no no, Tali please! Have mercy on a poor human who has a hard enough time resisting you," he said.

"No mercy Yahn, you're going to have me now," she whispered. She started unclasping everything on her front. John tried grabbing her hands, but he had no idea how to start putting her suit back on and every time she got one or the other hand free, her suit got a little more loose. This struggle continued with John trying very hard to stop her while she giggled and her top opened up and . . .

"Oh my God, her breasts look so cute!" John closed his eyes and suddenly had an idea.

She paused in the act of dismantling her suit and proceeded to kick her feet about while he stood back and activated his omni-tool while she slurred "Look it I'm an Asari dancer!"

As they had gotten to know each other, Tali had taught him how to activate specific suit functions should she need them and be incapable of activating them herself. And one of those programs was the detox. He activated it as she began to unclasp the suit along the sides of her hips.

"Yahn! You're not supposed to do that! I don wanna be sober yet. Yahn! YEEEP! CLOSE YOUR EYES DON'T LOOK AT ME! YAHN!"

John's eyes were closed but he couldn't help but laugh. For all her talk about wanting to be out of her suit time and time again over the months they had been together, she was essentially a shy girl when it came down to it. Finding herself practically naked, in a brightly lit room, now sober, her natural modesty had come back to the fore and she huddled in the corner covering herself up with the bed's pillows.

He lay down upon the bed with his eyes closed breathing heavily. He really liked how she looked, what little he had seen. Only a few women, when they are sufficiently young, can have good looking breasts when they are standing, but there are very few women, who are not yet old, who don't have great looking breasts when they are laying upon their back, thanks to the centering effects of gravity. Tali had been on her back. She was also the woman he was very much in love with.

"Whew!" exhaled John to himself. "That was too damn close. A little more skin and I would literally have lost it." Not to mention the fact that if she had gotten that suit off, the detox would not have worked.

"Yahn?" came a shy somewhat embarrassed voice.

"Yes Tali?"

"I'm dressed now."

"Come here Kitten," he suggested.

She snuggled up to him.

"I feel so slutty," she muttered.

"You were drunk, and it's not exactly what you're not supposed to do with me. We have already decided to be married. We would be if we could. But we have to wait because you have to acclimate. You think we're not going to make love the moment Dr. Mordin's acclimation mod allows us? If his mod had given clearance, right now the lights would be off and you would be in a state of complete ravishment by yours truly."

"Keelah, I'm going to be so sick tomorrow I just know it."

"You weren't that exposed for that long, Kitten."

"Umm, how much did you . . ."

"You're very pretty, Kitten. I loved everything I saw."

She whimpered, covered her eyes, and began making little kicks with her feet.

"Especially when you're embarrassed," he added.

Still covering her eyes and making little kicks.

"Tali I didn't tell you I saw anything, I just said that you looked pretty."

"Yahn, I'm not stupid. I know what you were sugyesting and I know how loose my suit was when you sobered me up."

"But you forget Tali, you taught me very early to keep my eyes closed so you would not fly to the moon," answered John.

She looked up at him. There was still pink in her eyes.

"Did you really close your eyes?"

"After I had a really good look at those cute little breasts of yours," was what he was tempted to say, but instead he merely said, "Yes" which was completely true. He had closed his eyes once he had realized he was looking at her breasts.

"You're so good to me," she offered.

"Thanks," he said.

"But now I've got a headache!" she whimpered.

They couldn't put it off any more. Jack had to be meshed. And it was hell. Miranda and Samara were there to provide biotic protection just in case. Kelly had done everything she could, but Jack was utterly determined to resist to the last. No one was going to tell her what to do. And she didn't need John telling her what to do because she already knew what to do. There were more than a few times she unleashed her biotics and Miranda and Samara had to protect John. Tali was in a state. She wanted Jack dead. Jack was threatening her Yahn. Then one evening Samara came to her with a problem. Once John had gotten the information, he knew just what he could do to perhaps resolve the Jack issue, one way or another. And as his patience was spent, he was almost willing for either resolution.

Walking in the next morning, with Tali behind him with her weapons locked and loaded, as well as Miranda and Samara, he noted Jack was on time. Apparently she had gotten tired of being bionicly picked up and carried to the drill site by Miranda and Samara.

"Well if it isn't the Cerberus Cheerleader and her Blue Bitch," suggested Jack. "And the Commander and his Bucket-head. Going to try to break me again today?"

"You think you're a bionic badass?" suggested John.

"You know it," she replied.

"You think you can do it on your own?"

"It's how I've done it all my life."

"Then you get the chance to prove it to me, girl," said John with a grim smile.

"Oh?"

"Samara here has a daughter named Morinth," said John leaning back and crossing his arms. "She's what is known as an Ardat-Yakshi, a demon of the night. Very scary bitch."

"Ooo I'm so like, trembling in my boots," snorted Jack.

"Samara has been hunting her daughter now for several hundred years. And that daughter is on Omega. You're going to track her down, and nail her so that Samara can finish her off."

"And what the fuck happens if I do it?" asked Jack.

"I don't put you through N7 drill," answered John. "You become a full member of the team and are included on all missions from now on."

"You're on," said Jack.

John left the drill site while Tali retired to engineering. He walked up to the pilot's chair.

"You sure about this Commander," asked Joker. "Because the last time I checked we were full up on crazy."

"I'm seldom this sure Joker," said John. "Set course for Omega."

He then walked over to Kelly's station.

"Commander?" She asked. "Your little deal with Jack has undone every bit of progress I've made in the past three weeks."

She was looking rather peeved.

"Sorry Kelly, I was not aware that you had made some breakthroughs," he answered.

"Well I got that off my chest, so what can I do for you Commander?" her chipper self had once more established itself as foremost in her psychological pecking order.

"Keep talking with Jack, try to put twice the time you can. Assign any peripheral duties to other deck personal. It's my fault so you can blame me if they bitch. But make sure she understands on some level that Morinth is deadly. Bring her up to par on the Ardat-Yakshi. Talk to Samara and do the research. I want Jack on some level realizing that this is deadly serious. Otherwise we stand a very good chance to loose her in a very permanent manner.

Kelly nodded.

"You want to talk about it?" she offered.

"I'm out of patience with Jack. I don't even know if I would care if she died.

"What does Tali think?"

"Tali wants her dead and has wanted her dead for a while."

"Tali? Our sweet happy girl Tali?" asked Kelly. "What has Jack done to bring that level of anger to Tali?"

"Tried to sleep with me," answered John.

"Ah," replied Kelly. She offered no more information.

"Have you talked with . . ."

"Commander you know I can't tell you what she's confided to me."

"Yes," finished John.

"You could take some time away from all this," suggested Kelly.

"We're out of time, Kelly," answered John. "This is the last chance."

The Normandy returned to Omega where Jack took Tali, Samara, and Jack out to meet with Aria. Along the way they were given a message by one of the Turian bodyguards of Aria. They were to 'do a favor' for a particular Krogan named Patriarch. John pressed him on it and found out some history, namely that Patriarch had been the ruler of Omega before Aria had supplanted him and she had kept him around to remind people what happened to her enemies. The favor involved protecting Patriarch from a Blood Pack assassination team but without Aria's direct intervention lest people conclude that she was getting soft. John arranged things in such a fashion that the old Krogan got a bit of his pride back. By the time he was done, word was out that the old Krogan had a krant, a fighting force which was pledged to defend his honor.

Aria was impressed. Patriarch was safe, Aria had nothing to do with it, and the old Krogan was a bit more feisty.

"Well then," began Aria. "What can I help you with?"

John looked at Jack.

"We're looking for a fucking Ardat-Yakshe," said Jack. She was going to show Shepherd she knew what to do.

"I knew it," grumbled Aria. "Nothing leaves a body so . . . empty . . . as an Ardat-Yaksee."

"So you noticed? What the fuck have you done about it?" asked Jack.

"Nothing," replied Aria. "She hasn't tried to seduce me. Her last victim was a young girl in the tenements. You could try there."

Jack turned and headed out.

"Interesting company you keep Shepherd," mused Aria. "Colorful as well."

In spite of the fact that as far as Shepherd knew, Jack had never been on Omega, the streets and byways seemed second nature to her, suggesting to John that she was familiar with the urban jungle. The rest of the team was nearby, and in touch with each other. Jack as far as she was concerned, was operating as a lone wolf with Shepherd monitoring her. It was how she always operated.

She got the street talk, made some quick deductions and turned down a side street finding a tenement apartment and walked in. Shortly thereafter, John arrived to see her talking to what appeared to be the mother of the victim. Jack's language was just as colorful, but she seemed to be applying her street wits and the woman slowly opened up.

"Are you one of Aria's people?" asked the woman.

"Fuck no, but I'm going to find the bitch who killed your daughter."

"Oh thank you," cried the woman. "The doctor said it was a brain hemorrhage but I know better, my Nef was killed."

"So tell me about Nef," continued Jack.

The woman explained that Nef was a shy girl, but extremely artistic. Jack asked if she liked tattoos and the woman said no, but she was a sculptor who had attracted the attention of several galleries. Then the girl had met Morinth, spoke of her as a queen, starting going to the VIP section of Afterlife, became tired and distracted, and she was convinced that Nef had been introduced to drug use by Morinth. Then the woman broke down and cried for a moment, and Jack just waited for her to get a hold of herself. There was no outreach, it was strictly getting the information.

Jack went into the girl's bedroom, poked around, read her dairy, and came back out and approached John.

"Here's what I found out," she said.

John had to admit he was impressed with the depth of her knowledge. She had even tracked down the password for the VIP section of the club.

"She didn't do ink, but she did ceramic and brass and that's close enough to make me want to rip the fucking head off that bitch Morinth," was Jack's summation.

Samara then proceeded to explain to Jack that Morinth liked to live dangerously and would be attracted to dark personalities which portrayed themselves as edgy.

"Then how did she get involved with such a fucking wall flower then?" replied Jack.

It was a very good question. One which Samara had no answer. And John began to wonder if this was going to be one of those moments when someone turned the tables on him and beat him at his own game. He didn't like the idea that she would be able to pull this off and give him a full dose of vulgar swearword filled smug. But he had issued the challenge and was now bound by it. But even if that turned out to be the case, what was lost?

Morale to begin with. Someone gets exempted. It was bad enough that Tali had appeared to be getting some slack cut but after that accidentally on purpose shotgun discharge, things seemed to have even keeled out. And of course everyone knew that Tali had called John on it thanks to Joker's little insult contest. But Jack was way different, she was the one who had avoided the entire thing so far and was now being treated differently. It was going to have a notable psychological impact on the crew. Once favoritism was shown in the way the crew got treated, there would be hell to pay.

"Well then I'll tell you," continued Jack. "Nef was creative. That's the link. This Asari bitch is going to hone in on my ink and that'll be the end of her."

And so the next evening cycle, John and Tali walked into the VIP section of Afterlife and selected a table where they could passively watch Jack lure Morinth in.

Jack came in around midnight, she was wearing her combat boots and fatigue pants, but nothing else. She had even removed that small leather strap she had worn on her top. As her entire skin surface was tattooed, you could barely make out any details, but it was decidedly edgy to begin with. Then she noted a drunk Turian giving an Asari dancer a hard time, and proceeded to go over there and intrude. What John and Tali noted however, was that Jack was joining the Turian in hassling the Asari and then made moves on the Turian herself. The two of them left the club shortly thereafter. John looked at Tali and rolled his eyes. They returned to the Normandy. Jack got back early the next morning looking rather pleased with herself.

She informed John that they would be back the next night. So once again John and Tali arrived at the club. Had a few drinks, complained to themselves about the loudness of the music, and sure enough Jack arrived once again stripped to the waist and mingled. And sure enough, a couple of Turians got rowdy around her and the next thing John and Tali knew was that the pair of them were flying over the dance floor and into a balcony alcove. Jack looked intolerably smug and leaned back against a well. And then a moment later, another Asari, looking a lot like Samara, but dressed in black, showed up. She approached Jack, and the two of them moved over to a booth out of the general view. John and Tali got up, walked over to the bar, and found that the booth could be viewed via the mirror behind the bar. Jack and the Asari talked for about three hours. During that time, it was obvious that Jack was sporting her 'ink' and telling the Asari about it. Finally, the two of them left together and John alerted Samara who was waiting outside.

Once the coast was clear, John and Tali got up and left, and followed Samara at a discrete distance.

"Miranda?" radioed John. "You have the med unit and Karin on alert?"

"Right with me Commander," replied Miranda back. "You sure life resuscitation is going to be necessary?"

"I'll be frank," answered John. "I'm almost counting on it. Keep on our 20 and follow at a discrete distance."

"Got it Commander," answered Miranda.

"You really think Yack is going to end up dead?" whispered Tali. Now that it looked like that was the possibility, she found herself not wanting Jack a corpse. She didn't quite know why, but it just seemed like something horrible.

"She tried to get me to have sex with her too many times," whispered John back. "I don't think she'll have the discipline to waste time with Morinth before Samara gets there."

And exactly six minutes and twenty-two seconds later, Samara radioed with "Shepherd, I need you here fast!"

And John and Tali ran.

Bursting into the apartment they found Morinth and Samara in a standoff, both biotically powerful enough to keep the other one at bay. Jack was on the ground, naked, her clothing tossed in a corner. She wasn't moving.

"Shepherd!" shouted Morinth. "I am as strong as she is, let me join you!"

John was stunned that Morinth recognized him, but he was likewise grateful that he had not been the bait as Samara had initially proposed. Morinth would have sensed the trap and likely fled.

"I have already sworn to your service!" replied Samara. "Let us finish this."

"Jack's flatlined," radioed John to Miranda. "Get here now!"

And then he and Tali pulled out their pistols and fired on Morinth diverting her biotics to protect her from the bullet damage. It was all that was needed to redress the balance. Morinth fell back before Samara's strong biotic thrusts and came up to her.

"Find peace in the embrace the Goddess," Samara told her. And then killed her.

Three minutes later Miranda, Mordin, and Dr. Chakwas came in with the resuscitation unit.

"Likely a brain hemorrhage," suggested John, "Based on her prior victims." He pointed to Morinth's corpse.

Miranda did a quick scan with her Omni-tool. "Damn it he's right," she muttered.

In a matter of twenty seconds, the machine was pumping oxygen into Jack's blood stream and moving the blood to keep the cellular structure alive. In addition, small nano-bots had been likewise put into the blood stream to clear the clotting in the brain. Only by keeping the cells alive and repairing the blood damage in the brain did they have a chance to save Jack. But she might be physically dead for another forty five minutes.

"Plenty of time," thought John. "Plenty of time for her to realize just what she's in for."

"I'm impressed," suggested Dr. Chakwas. This was the first time she had been directly on foot with the team for a mission. "You really suspected Jack would end up dead by brain hemorrhage."

"There wasn't any certainty," replied John. "But if you know someone well enough, you can make some pretty good guesses."

Cells, particularly brain cells, can survive up to 30 minutes without oxygen replenishment. So long as Jack had not been dead too long, they could bring her back once her brain and heart were back in operation. The medical machinery did it's job. The corpse of Jack was wheeled back to the Normandy where her heart was started again. There were three false starts and then it kicked in.

Two seconds later Jack was sitting up screaming "The Claws!"

There was so much fear, terror, anguish, despair, and hopelessness in that cry that Tali squeezed John's arm so tightly that he felt serious pain. He put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her to him. She was trembling under his arms.

Jack remained clinging to Karin. And Dr. Chakwas was likewise holding Jack, and for a brief second, John once again saw that frightened little girl so long buried under Jack's anger.


	15. Chapter 15 - Dead God Dreaming

The Normandy was docked at Omega, and had been there for six weeks.

It was now early September and Tali was able to go so long without her helmet in the cabin that when she got in at the end of dinner, she simply removed the items and did not put them back on again until they went down to breakfast. Once in a great while she would sneeze or sniffle. And about every twelve to fifteen days she would run a slight fever due to the exhaustion of her immune system adapting to the cabin. But it wasn't striking either her or John as anything out of the ordinary, especially since there wasn't a day on the Normandy that some crew member didn't sneeze. They were quite happy with the arrangement. He got to see her face every night, and she got to kiss him when ever she wanted. They could talk, kiss, cuddle, and after the lights were off and she was huddled up next to him, he would gently stroke her back and go to sleep listening to her heelrou. And of course the next morning there she was, her face peacefully sleeping next to him or up already and busying herself with tidying up the cabin or be at the mirror brushing her hair.

Now that she was able to go several hours without her helmet, she was allowing her blue-black hair to grow a bit and when John had given her a hair brush, she had discovered the fun of training her hair to fall and curl. Quarian women had always used their hoods as a way of creating the illusion of a long hair style, not unlike the medieval women did on Earth back in the cold European winters. But now with her hood off for eight hours each day, Tali had reasons to care for her hair that she never had before. Her styling with her own hair brush was nothing even remotely close to the hair styles that a human woman would routinely sport, but then again, there was no point in Tali going that far. She was still entirely in her suit on the rest of the Normandy and every time she stepped off of it. But her hair was a bit longer than it had been under the suit. And she was looking forward to it growing a bit more. John clearly loved her hair and told her so routinely, so she primped and preened with it smiling at herself in the mirror.

It was one of those little brushing sessions where John was relaxing on the bed and getting ready to sleep when he found himself wondering if given the choice between making love to Tali and listening to her heelrou for the rest of his life, which he would choose.

"Tali?" he asked.

"Yahn? No Kitten, Monkey duck, Tali duck, Fairy Princess? What are you so worried about?" she asked.

"Once we make love, will I still be able to hear your happy noise at night?"

"Yahn, of course."

"That is so nice," he said. "It's got to be one of the best things about being with you."

"So it's the noises I make when we cuddle? Oh Yahn, and I thought you yust wanted me for my body,"

She was in a playful mood so he tossed a pillow at her which she batted away with her hands.

"Oh come on now Tali, I couldn't even see anything when I first met you. I had no idea how sweet your face would be, how soft your hair was going to be, how cute your breasts were . . ."

"WHAT!?"

John did a face palm.

"You said you had your eyes closed!" she exclaimed. Her eyes were beginning to turn a shade of pink.

"I did! I did!" he protested. "But I only closed them because your top flew open and they were so soft and sexy looking I had to or I'd have lost control!"

"You had to?"

"Open mouth insert multiple feet!" he thought as he started to defend himself from a wrath filled Quarian who was beating him over the head with the pillow he had just thrown at her.

"You beast! You horrible peeping Yahn beast!"

Of course she was grinning. So John cowered onto a corner of the bed until she triumphantly sat upon him and proclaimed victory waving the pillow over her head.

"That will teach you!" she proclaimed. "Peeking at things you were not supposed to because I was being a deliberate tease."

"You mean like this?" queried John who simply could not resist the temptation and placed both his hands upon her breasts. Naturally her suit's thickness rendered the behavior hardly worth the effort but he was likewise in a playful mood and so far had behaved himself admirably on that count. If she could be a tease on Illium, he'd be a tease on Omega.

Tali's reaction caught him by surprise. She looked down at his hands and fingers gently stroking her. She simply folded her arms underneath his hands and gave him a look along the lines of "And this is supposed to do what?"

"And this is your idea of being a tease?" she asked.

"You mean you don't feel anything?"

"Well of course I feel something you silly. I do feel the caressing. I'm not numb. But if you think I'm aroused by it, I'll have you know that the only time a Quarian girl feels something good on her breasts is when she's nursing her young. Or so I've been taught. And then it's a nice feeling, not a sexy feeling. If you want to tease me Yahn, you're going to have to try something else.

She made a triumphant smile and tossed her head with a little 'humph'.

Well that took all the fun out of it.

So he tickled her instead and she hooted most gratuitously until in her struggles, her foot smacked him up'side the head so hard he fell off the bed and landed on the floor. She was panicked for a second until he insisted her care and ministrations on his bruises lacked sufficient kisses. And then the pillow fight began.

Jack was still foul mouthed and belligerent, but there had been a change in the weather. The day after she had been revived, and she remained in sickbay being watched and scanned for any signs of serious brain damage, John walked in and proceeded to give her a blow for blow description of what she had experienced after Morinth had killed her. Jack initially resisted, but John knew exactly what she had gone through and at the end of the session, Jack was literally once again possessing that frightened little girl look and holding her pillow in front of her as if it would some how ward off bad things. It was clear she was not going to fake him out on that count. He was reminding her of what she was desperately trying to forget. But what had freaked her out most was the fact that John knew exactly what she had gone through. She had heard he had been dead, but she had never thought it out. Now it was crashing in on her.

"You want to live then?" asked John.

"Fuck yes!"

"Then why don't you cooperate with me and learn drill, so that when we go into the Collector's home system, we come out alive?"

And she did. She too had heard that it was very likely they were not coming back and now she had extra reasons to trust John.

A very big piece of stupid had been fixed in Jack, but there was a lot more to go. But the drill added the next piece. Jack began to learn discipline, and that made her think a little further down the road. Jack's N7 training was going to have a far greater impact on the next two years than any other team member under John's command. But neither Jack nor John had any idea this would be the case at the time.

In the mean time, the team went out into the streets to track down Zaeed Massani. It wasn't a large team. Since it was a step and fetch, it was only John, Tali, Garrus, and Miranda. But as they worked their way towards the meeting point John took a short cut through a back alley and then stopped.

"Oh my God," he half muttered half cried. "Tali don't look."

And of course she looked to find out what it was she wasn't supposed to look at.

"Damn it," said John. "Find something to cover her with, give her some dignity."

Garrus was leaning over next to John, and then Tali saw it. Or rather her. It was a young Quarian girl who was dead, and naked. Garrus was rubbing his finger along the sides of her nose where a red mucus had gathered.

John meanwhile had found an old tarp and was covering up the girl. He was clearly upset.

"Red Sand," grumbled Garrus. "The quickest way to get a Quarian out of her suit, and dead."

Tali could see John was upset, and as she looked at him she also saw him looking back at her. His glance seemed to say, "That could have been your sister or best friend." And she understood just how closely he was identifying with her and her people now. She walked over to him and simply placed her hands upon his shoulders and leaned against him.

"Oh Yahn," she sighed.

"We'll see if we can identify her," said John softly. "And give her a proper burial. Or at least return the body to her family on the fleet."

With the help of Garrus, they wrapped up the body and John slung it over his shoulder. Miranda was looking at John, and the body, and Tali noticed that her face went a little pale, as if she was realizing something for the first time.

Zaeed was shortly found afterwards, in the process of escorting a prisoner for the bounty. He acknowledged the team and assured them he would meet them on the Normandy. Looking at the body over Shepherd's shoulders he said, "Guddam body every day or so in the alleys. Don't know why this one is important to you but every body is important to someone. Wouldn't be a bounty hunter if it wasn't." He gruffly nodded and moved his prisoner on.

Returning to the Normandy, the body of the dead girl was put on the medical table and Karin examined all the identifying marks and sent the information to the Migrant Fleet. Within a couple of hours, they received a message from the Migrant Fleet that the girl's name was Shari'Horinth nar Burgundia and if they would be so kind as to keep the body for the time being until a small ship from the fleet could arrive to pick it up. As was so often the case with the Quarians, it was the family's only child, only two months from when she had left on her pilgrimage.

And so John gave Zaeed the N7 drill and found him more than capable. In fact, once John had learned something of Zaeed's history, he realized he had found a genuine second in command on the field. And once he had meshed in with the rest of the team, Shepherd found himself experiencing a certain level of confidence that he had not experienced before.

And it came none too soon, for another transmission from Tim arrived.

"Shepherd, we got a break," he started. "I intercepted a distress call from a Turian patrol. They stumbled upon a Collector ship beyond the Corvus System. The Turians were wiped out but not before they crippled the Collector ship. I need you to board that ship and get some hard data on the Collectors. Find us a way to get to their home world."

"Hard to imagine how a Turian patrol could take out a Collector ship," suggested Shepherd.

"Reports indicate that the hull seems to be intact, but all onboard systems are off line. They could be making repairs as we speak. I'm not saying it won't be dangerous, but we can't let an opportunity like this slip by."

"Intact hull, but no systems on line?" mused Shepherd to himself. "That does not make that much sense. What are the odds?"

"If they had a patrol out there, why aren't the Turians sending a Recon team in?" he asked.

"They will, eventually, but I intercepted the transmissions. In the meantime, I'm sending them false reports. You're close enough that you can be in and out before the Turians learn the truth."

"What? How the hell can any one intercept transmissions like that and keep them from reaching their intended destination? There is something smelling here." he thought.

"Are you sure this information is good?" he asked.

"Information is my weapon Shepherd. It's good," replied The Illusive Man.

"Send me the coordinates and I'll take care of it."

"Already sent. Once you are on board, establish an uplink with EDI, she'll mine their data regarding information for the Omega Four Relay. Good luck Shepherd."

John knew there was more to this. The Illusive Man either had no clue how the transmission of information worked - which was extremely unlikely - or he was not being totally up front and was hiding behind a really bad lie. This wasn't the pre-radio transmission age where couriers had to take dispatches which could be intercepted. But at the same time, John also knew that this was an opportunity they simply had to take.

But he was going to go in with eyes wide, feet cautious, shields up, armor on, and both hands holding loaded guns. And likewise he made sure the team was fully prepped.

Given the personalities and talents, John had the formation down. Thane and Garrus would be on either flank, Garrus on his traditional right while Thane would be on the left. Kasumi would be scout, moving across the front of the team when necessary, but likewise usually on either side based upon her discretion. Her cloaking capabilities were to be exploited as much as possible, with her seldom employing her gun, save when she had an easy non-detectable strike on a critical target.

Across the front was Grunt, Jacob, Zaeed, and John himself. Behind them on the flanks were Miranda and Samara providing biotic cover. Behind the team were Mordin, Tali, and Jack. Jack's job was biotic protection unless there was something that needed punching through, and then she was unleashed as a powerful first strike. Grunt and Jacob were the center, the point if necessary. Zaeed was responsible for everything on the left, while John was responsible for everything on the right. Everyone knew their jobs, and Shepherd had taken advantage of a military simulation on Omega which was primarily for amusement, but was realistic enough that team tactics would be practiced.

But as they closed in on the vessel, it got even more suspicious. There was no wreckage nearby which suggested any Turian involvement.

"That thing is massive," gasped Joker. "How could the Turians have taken it out?"

EDI's analysis clearly pointed to the ship being simply shut down. A Marie Celeste . . . A Ghost Ship.

"Be ready for anything," suggested Shepherd, and they boarded the shuttle and landed on the ship.

The interior was a mixture of insect hive and hard steel.

"I love what they've done with the place," joked Garrus.

EDI lead them towards a access node she could uplink to and that was where they team went first.

"I've only seen one place fucking uglier than this," whispered Jack. "I hope we blow this one to there."

"This is the vessel you encountered on Horizon," continued EDI.

"Yahn? This is getting creepy," suggested Tali.

"The batteries might have messed with the ship," speculated Jacob. "But no hull breaches? This pizza's got its' pepperoni on the wrong side."

"The missing colonists might be on board," suggested Garrus. "If they are still alive."

The team moved forward and then found some of those missing colonists. But they were not alive. And what's more, they appeared to be somewhat fused and melted together.

"What happened here?" asked Thane.

"Used for testing," speculated Mordin.

"I'd say these subjects didn't pass," was Garrus' ironic assessment.

Pushing on, the team reached an access node and beside it was a dead Collector. A quick analysis of the date revealed something even more curious. The Collectors were genetically descended from the Protheans. They had been in fact, genetically rewritten.

"An entire slave race," whispered Jacob. "These Reapers desperately need killing."

Then Joker broke in, "Commander you've got to hear this. On a hunch I asked EDI to run an analysis on the ship."

"I compared the EM profile against original data recorded on the original Normandy two years ago. They are the exact match," said EDI.

"The same ship dogging me for two years," asked Shepherd. "Way beyond coincidence."

Samara noted that Tali was beginning to tremble.

"Something doesn't add up Commander," continued Joker. "Watch your six."

The team proceeded. The ship was huge and what's more, the silence continued to wear on them. Every turn they expected to see something coming for them. But the absence of life continued to be the order of the day. Then they stepped out into a massive cathedral vault that stretched hundreds of yards in front of them.

"This is incredible," gasped Garrus.

"They could take every human in the Terminus Systems," observed Thane. "And they still would not have filled up all these pods."

"You think they are going to target Earth?" asked Miranda.

"I would suspect so," answered Garrus.

"Not if we stop them," snapped Shepherd.

"There, on the platform," said Tali running to up Shepherd and pointing ahead. "Looks like some sort of control panel." She then backed up but not before giving his arm a little "I'm scared make me brave" squeeze.

"Is it just me?" asked Jacob. "Or is the emptiness that isn't supposed to be here giving me the bugs?"

"No Collectors, living or dead," suggested Thane. "I'm wondering."

Meanwhile Tali had linked up EDI to the main terminal and she was engaged in more data mining. This went on for about ten seconds. Then all the screens went blank on Joker's monitors and the last thing he saw was a very bug like and large Collector showing up on the screen.

"Uh," he offered. "That can't be good."

And then the terminal the team was standing by shut down, loudly.

"Every one here is alright Joker," said Shepherd as the entire team formed a ring so that every angle had fire covering it.

"Major power surge. Everything went dark but we're back on power now," answered Joker.

"I managed to divert most of the overload to non-critical systems," added EDI. "Shepherd, it was not a malfunction. This was a trap."

And the floor which the entire team was standing on, took off and began to fly.

"EDI? We need a little help," suggested Shepherd.

"I'm having trouble, there's someone else in the system," replied EDI.

The platform dropped and tilted, spilling everyone out.

"Back in formation now!" barked Shepherd.

The team got on their feet, put themselves back into position, and then began to duck for cover as more platforms began to fly in. These new platforms were occupied by Collectors.

The firefight had begun.

It was the craziest tactic seen so far. Each Collector fire team flew in on a hexagonal platform which linked up to one of the platforms already emplaced and proceeded to fire on the team. But already in a central location and with cover on each side, the team was able to keep each Collector team pinned down and then eliminated as they methodically flew in, one after another, with no real change in overall tactics.

Then Shepherd heard the voice he had been waiting for, that voice of the Collector leader who boomed out, "Assuming direct control" and suddenly seemed to be possessing one of the Collector soldiers. That Collector was a bit tougher than the others as a result, but he persisted in walking forward and was gunned down as the others were, albeit with a higher bullet requirement.

"Duck!" snapped Shepherd, "Initiate Wizard Hack."

One of the dramatic moments in the Cold War had been when the North Koreans had seized a spy ship, named Pueblo, which had been monitoring North Korean radio transmissions. The ship's advantage was that it could stay in international waters while it was monitoring. Thus in theory, the North Koreans could not touch it. The North Koreans however, suffering from a family line of despots who held excessive delusions of grandeur, did not regard international law as something which they were bound to. They seized the ship and the captain of the vessel earned the dubious distinction of being the first American commander to surrender a ship without firing a shot.

The crew was taken to North Korea, tortured, beaten, and efforts were made to get them to confess all sorts of crimes against the North Korean people. It was, as was so often the case during the Communist era, done for purely propaganda purposes, albeit far more brutally than found in other Communist countries of the time. But the American sailors had their ways of resisting. The most successful was when one of the sailors extended his middle finger at a Communist officer, an ancient Roman phallic gesture which was turned up in the American style unlike the Roman which turned the finger down. The officer, not knowing what it signified, asked the sailor about it, who claimed it was a Hawaiian good luck blessing. Naturally all the other American sailors concurred, and over the next three months, every single propaganda picture sent out of North Korea had the entire crew giving the camera that Hawaiian good luck blessing. The North Koreans looked like fools as a result.

Shepherd had the same idea with the wizard hack, something he and Tali had worked up back after Horizon. It was why he made the Wizard of Oz required entertainment for the team. Tali initiated the hack and as it seemed so utterly innocuous and bereft of any genuine tactical application, it completely slipped through the Collector firewalls. It simply changed the translation protocols on one specific sentence.

The net result was that every time the Collector overlord possessed a soldier, the team did not hear the deep rumbling "Assuming direct control." What they heard was the deep rumbling "I'll get you my pretty. You and your little dog Toto too."

The Collectors might have wondered why Team Shepherd was smiling as they were firing, if they understood what a smile signified, but at no point did the Collectors ever catch on. It was a little thing in the overall scheme of things, but that little adjustment took just a bit of the fear off the edge of the fight. That made Team Shepherd just a little more capable against the Collectors.

But Shepherd was not going to be a fool, the ship easily outnumbered the team and sooner or later they were going to do it right, even if entirely by accident.

"EDI, get us out of here!" ordered Shepherd.

"I am presently fighting 4,287 Collector firewalls," replied EDI.

Then suddenly, the fight was out of the Collectors and there was silence. It was one of those lulls in combat, which comes when one side has had so much punishment, that they have to fall back and get something back of their cohesion and morale.

"Commander?" asked EDI. "I will need you to re-establish my link to the main platform."

The team returned to the first terminal, alert for another Collector attack. EDI once again began data mining and announced that she had found the Turian distress call which had been sent out. It had originated from the Collector ship, but with one essential difference. Turian transmissions always had a secondary encryption which was missing from the Collector broadcast. And furthermore, according to EDI, Tim would have known it was faked.

There was a lot of mutual head nodding to each other in Team Shepherd.

"And here I thought I had my fair share of betrayal and attempted murder for the year," sighed Garrus.

Tali sighed. This was such a familiar experience for her now.

"Commander?" shouted Joker. "The ship is powering up. We have to get you out of there before their weapons go online. I'm not losing another Normandy."

"Rolling Thunder out of here," ordered Shepherd.

And the team began to move at a rapid pace, weapons out and facing front, towards the exit coordinates.

And the Collector fire teams began to fly in.

"We are Harbinger," rumbled the Collector voice. "You can not stop us."

Rolling Thunder was a fire tactic which Shepherd had trained the team in. Everyone swept the area in front of them as they advanced so that the Collectors would take casualties just flying in and trying to take their own cover. Then the team would advance right to left one at a time while everyone else kept firing. Metal bars were consumed, heat sinks were popped, but the rain of bullets persisted as the team moved forward.

The team burst out of a corridor and saw the shuttle, but it was a story beneath them and no one was in the mood to jump down fifty feet. They were going to have to take the long way around.

"Commander, I hate to rush you," radioed Joker. "But those weapons are about to come online. Might want to double time it so we can leave before they blow the Normandy in half."

The Collectors new tactic was to throw hoards of husks at the team and Mordin got to throw those fun shotgun grenades of his. But even with killing them by the dozens, precious seconds were wasted. But Shepherd was thankful for one thing. The Collectors still did not have any genuine tactical finesse. They merely came in shooting. Had they bothered to set up so much as one defensive position and wait, Team Shepherd would have been left stranded.

With seconds to spare, the shuttle flew into the hull of the Normandy and EDI engaged Mass Effect drives to take the Normandy, "Any place but here" which was in accord with Joker's instructions.

Shepherd then contacted The Illusive Man and demanded an explanation. The Illusive Man's arguments were very persuasive, if you were not the thinking sort. He could not let Team Shepherd know it was a trap lest they pick up on it. And furthermore, he was certain that Team Shepherd would pull through okay. And what was especially important was that the data EDI had discovered was that the Reaper and Collector ships were able to fly through the Omega 4 Relay safely due to a sophisticated IFF protocol. The trick would be to get one of those IFF protocols.

Thus the data could have been worth the risk, if Shepherd had been someone other than Shepherd.

At this point The Illusive Man informed Shepherd that a dead Reaper had been found in orbit around a Brown Dwarf. That dead Reaper might have one of those protocols. Estimated age was 37 million years old. Shepherd was suspicious about Cerberus dating procedures. It would be extremely unlikely that a Reaper could have survived that long in orbit around a Brown Dwarf under it's own power without something knocking it loose. Under it's own power that long was an absurd notion in and of itself. One of the things which enabled the Citadel and Relays to survive was that they were being persistently maintained by the keepers. Without that constant maintenance, the Citadel and Conduits would have been nothing but orbiting hunks of metal, with tens of thousands of hull breaches from orbiting bits of space detritus. Earth's moon was routinely getting plastered. It was in fact one of the chief reasons why the Earth itself was so seldom hit by asteroids. Granted the moon was bigger than a Reaper, but even so, there was way too much time involved. Even the supposed method of finding the Reaper was absurd. While tracing a beam weapon's path across a set of points based upon a catastrophic tear in a planet's surface was possible, you still had to account for axis wobble and gravitational shifts in orbit which routinely take place over the millennia. You had a massive set of points you needed to search based upon the planet's location over time. And the farther out you went the more area was included in the search.

But when Shepherd asked The Illusive Man why an ordinary science team couldn't find that IFF protocol itself. He was informed of yet another mystery. The Science Team sent by Cerberus to the Reaper had stopped contacting Cerberus.

The coordinates were sent.

They had to go, there was no doubt about that, but there was a discussion in the team room that evening.

"So Tim didn't betray us," suggested Jacob.

"Depends on what you mean by betrayal," replied Miranda.

"Necessary risk," presumed Mordin.

"Folks," interrupted John. "There is very little we would have done differently if we had gone in there knowing it was a trap because we went in there expecting it to be a trap."

"After all," replied Garrus. "Tim did suggest he had intercepted the distress signal which the Turians did not and that is simply impossible. Nor would he have been able to feed them false information without them suspecting as well. In order to do that, he would have had to be able to duplicate the secondary encryption, and as that is always changing, he would need an awful lot of cybernetic staff and even if he did have such an extensive staff, he still has new protocols to crack every two months.

"Garrus correct," added Mordin "Salarian code breaking top of the line still week to month delays between interception of new protocols and cracking of encryption."

"What we saw," signed Miranda. "is what I routinely saw throughout my career in Cerberus. The reduction of a team to tools. I kept thinking he'd exempt me because I was so damn good at what I did."

"Feeding the crocodile with others in the hope the crocodile eats you last," sighed Jacob. "So what do we do now."

"We escape!" suggested Kasumi. "We disappear and hide."

"Track the little shit down and blow his fucking head off!" suggested Jack.

"We can't do that just yet," said Shepherd. "We first of all, need a clear line of retreat. Second of all, we have to stop the Collectors. We have to keep using Tim until we can safely make the break."

"Playing a dangerous game," observed Mordin.

"But we know Tim will want to keep us in action until we hit the Collectors," observed Shepherd. "It's afterwards that it becomes an issue."

"Retreating is a wuss idea," offered Grunt.

"Where the enemy is weak, advance," answered Shepherd. "Where the enemy is strong, retreat. So says Sun Tzu. It's simple common sense. And Cerberus is not something we have the power to take out. We might not even have the power to take out the Collectors. We'll only know after we get through the Omega 4 Relay."

"So where are you proposing to fall back to," asked Garrus.

"I have two ideas," answered Shepherd. "And I'm going to think on them tonight, and the nice thing about both ideas is this. We can retreat both ways with them."

"Interesting concept," observed Mordin who was obviously intrigued with the mental puzzle presented.

Tali's omni-tool beeped and she got up. Pulling out a little device from her pocket, she walked up behind Shepherd and stuck it in his ear. Then left. Shepherd smiled. She was putting his little translator into his ear. It reminded him that she would be waiting for him in their cabin.

"So what are these two ideas," asked Miranda.

"I won't share them until I've determined they are worth consideration," answered Shepherd. "We need to know they will work first, and I won't be leaking them to the Team in the hopes that one of you sells out and informs Tim thus misleading him. Our only chance is to trust each other, both on the battlefield, and off."

"But there's one other thing we need to talk about," he continued. "Garrus, do you remember that talk on the Normandy back before Ilos?"

"The one where we were discussing the parallels between Reaper thinking and human tyrannical thinking?" asked Garrus.

Shepherd nodded.

"I think your little hack of Harbinger made that somewhat obvious," he continued.

Everyone smiled.

"But what I'm thinking of, is indoctrination," continued Shepherd. "We could not figure out how the Asari would succumb given the reality of Free Will. Mordin? When we go to that Reaper, we're going to need you analyzing everything around you, this might be our one chance to find out just what it is that indoctrination is about. I highly doubt that this Reaper is millions of years old, given it's state and it's orbit and what has happened to the Team Cerberus has already sent suggests it is much younger. It is entirely possible that when this Reaper died, Sovereign was sent to replace it. We need to be on our high guard."

Mordin nodded.

"Intriguing possibilities," he observed.

"According to my calculations," intruded EDI. "It will be a five day cruise to reach the derelict Reaper. Shall I inform Joker to set course?"

"No EDI, we're going to the Citadel first, and then I think we're going to visit the Migrant Fleet," answered Shepherd.

"The possibility of there being survivors on the Reaper from the Science Team . . ." suggested EDI.

John Shepherd paused. He scanned the room. Tim was treacherous, he had successfully managed to convince the entire team and much of the crew on that count. But if he left that Science Team to it's fate, how much better was he? The team had to know he would be there for them. And the Cerberus members on that Reaper were not Tim. Life had a habit of doing that when you were making other plans.

"Set course for the Reaper," he said. "Team dismissed."

And with that, everyone retired to their respective quarters.

He reached his cabin and came in. Tali was busy at her desk with a pile of circuit boards bits of silicon and copper wire. She was doing micro-repairs. John put his hands on her shoulders and looked at her work. He found it fascinating that she seemed to be able to see things on those boards he could not. Furthermore, the precision of her fingers holding the repair tools which were needed to make such microscopic repairs. But then he noticed something else.

It was her engagement ring he had purchased for her on the Citadel. Tali had done something to it. There were two small beads of copper on either side of the diamond strand and there was a delicate copper wire weave which had been placed on top of the silver band, allowing the silver to still shine through. He walked over to where her gloves were, and searched for that little copper wire ring. It was missing.

"Tali?" he asked. "Did you take the copper ring and fuse it to your silver engagement ring?"

"I hope you don't mind Yahn. It was made to be worn over my gloves, but I have to take it off every time I remove my gloves and I'm spending all my evenings and sleeping hours with my gloves off and it's so . . . precious to me I want to wear it always. So I put the two together so I would always have the ring you made for me, as well as the ring that reminded me of you after you were . . ."

He gave her another hug, and pulled her chair out from her desk so she would face him. He was routinely reminded that she had no peripheral vision and if he came up to her from her back, she could not turn her head around enough to look at him. He paused and looked at her for a moment as she gently smiled at him. The lights from the aquarium were reflecting little bits of blue in her eyes, tiny sparkles which he found persistently intriguing. She was looking up at him now and he picked up her left hand with the ring on the second finger, and looked at it for a moment, gently caressing her fingers as he did so.

"You'll have to excuse me," he said. "While I do intimate things with your fingers."

"I'll deal with it," she offered.

"You did a very nice job on the ring. Your precision never ceases to amaze me."

"Thank you Yahn."

"But if you will join me on the couch, I have something I want to talk to you about."

"We could yust go to bed and talk there," she offered.

"Well if we do that," he observed. "I'll start to caress your back, and you'll start doing happy noise, and you don't talk much when you do that, and happy noise makes me sleepy, and we won't get it done."

She stood up and let him guide her over to the couch. She stood there while he sat down and she plopped herself onto his lap. He winced a little since those over wide hips put some serious pressure on his legs, but once she settled in, he could achieve a little bit of comfort. Plus she was looking directly into his face. He tried to open his mouth to say something but she was busy kissing it for the next few moments. Then after a bit she, much more relaxed, started the conversation.

"So what did you want to talk about?"

"Going two places after we deal with this derelict Reaper, the Citadel and the Migrant Fleet," he answered.

"Why the Migrant Fleet?" she asked.

"First of all, I want to see where you grew up, who your friends were, meet your father, see if he'll accept me at least as your captain."

"I suspect he knows by now," she said with a bit of resignation. "Auntie Raan and I communicate all the time, and she's known I was in love with you only slightly less than you did. And given all the guys she had me meet and work with over the time before Haestrom, I suspect she knew I was still in love with you at some level. She might have even confided to my father after you were dead thinking it was over and she was free to discuss the matter with him. But you said first of all . . ."

"And I'm thinking we can join the Migrant Fleet and offer the Normandy as a vessel as a means of escaping the wrath of Cerberus if things go south."

"Yahn! Do you even know what you are sugyesting? I mean what about the rest of the Normandy's crew?"

"They would have a choice of course," he replied. "But it would be a safe haven since Cerberus can't just fly up to the Fleet without there being some warning. How many humans are on the fleet now anyway?"

"None," replied Tali. "When a Quarian bonds with a human, she leaves the Migrant Fleet, the human doesn't yoin the Migrant Fleet. How will that human eat?"

"Isn't that same problem with the Quarian outside of the fleet? I'm sure something could be arranged. Isn't the Normandy a prize?"

"Oh Yahn, the Migrant Fleet would regard the Normandy as an incredible gift. But even so, a life time of finding levo food for you?"

"The other option is to see if I can get my Specter status back on the Citadel," he replied.

"Councilor Anderson would probably accept you back," mused Tali. Then she spent a few moments kissing him. John tried to start a couple of sentences, but Tali was persistent and so he just gave up for a while until she finished expressing her affections.

"So what was that all about?" he asked. "Just kissy time because you're in my lap or was there something else?"

"It yust dawned on me how much you love me," she said. "You were willing to go back to the Migrant Fleet with me and live with me there for the rest of your life. When I realized that, there was nothing for it but a lot of kisses."

"Ah," said John.

"Well have you communicated with Councilor Anderson yet?" she asked.

"Not yet," answered John. "I'm still focused on the mission. But it's been a few months since the rumors started to circulate about my return. I supposed I had better touch bases. But that will have to wait until after the Reaper investigation."

The Normandy closed in on the Reaper ruin which remained suspended in the upper atmosphere of the Brown Dwarf. As per SOP, the stealth systems were engaged and it paid off. There was a Geth ship docked at the Reaper.

"Well that explains why the Cerberus team was lost," mused Joker.

The shuttle reached the Cerberus entryway into the derelict reaper. Upon entering, they quickly noted all the marks of a major Cerberus operation. An entire building unit had been installed in the Reaper as they had sealed off breaches with the hull and begun to pressurize sections they were investigating. But there were the corpses of husks.

"This isn't Geth damage," observed Miranda.

The Cerberus logs likewise told another story. There was a primal, almost superstitious fear among all the operatives which the head of the operation not only acknowledged, but admitted he himself was suffering from.

"We are on the corpse of a dead god," he mused in one entry. "But a dead god who is dreaming."

"Mordin? Are you scanning for signs of indoctrination?" asked Shepherd.

"Taking samples from everywhere and everything," answered Mordin.

Another entry expressed annoyance with the staff who were examining samples which they had acquired from the Reaper. They were insisting that there was no evidence of nano-technology and it was patently obvious. The head of the staff was extremely suspicious, especially when one of the head investigators spoke of listening to the samples.

Mordin nodded and immediately adjusted his scanning with his omni-tool.

And then the Reaper cut the team off from the Normandy by putting up a status field.

"Why do I get the impression that we just walked into another trap?" sighed John.

"Because you're Commander Shepherd and the Spirits seem determined to stick it to you," offered Garrus. "But at least we are not longer required to rescue pretty girls from certain death in every mission like on the old Normandy."

"That's because the prettiest girl is already with us," suggested John.

"And that would be?" asked Miranda with just a hint of hiss or growl, no one was sure which, in her voice. Tali said nothing, but she did a few little bounces behind Shepherd and suggested a mild head toss or two.

"Here we go again," suggested Garrus.

In the mean time EDI noted that the power for the status field had come from the Reaper's mass effect core and that meant they would have to go deep into the Reaper to turn off the status field, which of course would mean that the Reaper would likewise plunge into the planet below them.

"Everybody dies," suggested Joker.

"Unless the best pilot in the galaxy can get to us before we reach crush depth," proposed Shepherd.

"Of course," answered Joker. "Good hunting."

More log entries, and more signs of oncoming mental confusion and instability. The log entries started to suggest that the crew were starting to see things. That the ship itself was a force, a force which affected everything around it. And all the while Mordin busy sweeping more samples while humming what Shepherd suspected were snatches of melodies from old operas. He wasn't sure which, but they seemed to be on the whole patter and bouncy melodies. The sort that Tali would probably enjoy dancing to.

And then the husks showed up. It was the same sort of crazy mindless clawing attacking which the team was already used to. Shotguns and machine pistols quickly made short work of them, but as always there were an awful lot of them. Shepherd kept wondering where they had all come from, the Cerberus team could not have been that large could it?

Then they reached a great open area, and placed in a center design, were dragon's teeth, many of them still possessing the corpses of Cerberus team members upon them.

"Worship at the altar," observed Shepherd. "Not even Vlad the Impaler went this far."

"Vlad the Impaler?" asked Samara.

"Romanian national hero, famous for impaling his enemies on stakes, secured Romanian independence from the Turkish Caliph. His last name, Dracula, became the title of a classic horror story about a vampire who haunted London. Of course Romanian vampires are nothing like English vampires. They are a different creature altogether, though both consume the blood of the living."

"Excellent chance of samples," observed Mordin. "Very good chance of, Yes!"

He apparently had found something important.

Then another set of husks showed up, but before Shepherd's team was able to respond, the husks were all dead from exploding heads. Looking up, just fifty feet away, was a Geth unit, it's sniper rifle slung over it's shoulder.

"Shepherd Commander," it said. It turned and walked away.

"I've never known a Geth unit to talk to organics before," mused Samara.

"That's because a single Geth program is no smarter than a Varren," replied Tali. Her shot gun was out and she was scanning everything around them. Shepherd found it curious that before combat, she would frequently get very jumpy and on occasion out right frightened. But once battle began, she would swing into full combat mode and it was as if she was the ideal soldier. He wondered how much of that was her own internal discipline and how much of it was due to his N7 training of her.

There was more combat with the husks. As they moved through the Reaper ship, Shepherd remained amazed at the massive amount of men and materials Cerberus had put into investigating this wreak. Platforms built by Cerberus went the entire length of the ship, even to the massive hole where the ship had been punctured by some massive weapon once upon a time, or was it something else, like a flying asteroid smashing through? He didn't know, what he did know was that the ship was still, on some level alive, and it seemed to be waiting. He was beginning to sense that. And he wasn't sure why, which was worrying him.

"St. Michael the Archangel,  
Defend us in Battle."

He muttered it under his breath over and over again. Whether or not it would keep his mind clear he wasn't sure. But it was high time he started acknowledging that there was more to this fight than just a bunch of old machines with a quirky notions trying to impose their own views upon a galaxy.

They went down another tunnel and found the IFF data. The Cerberus team had recovered it. Then they broke into the Mass Effect core of the vessel and found the Geth busy trying to do it's own data scan while fighting off the husks.

"Spare the Geth!" shouted Shepherd and then he snapped off code talk orders as the fight kicked in. As far as he was concerned, the enemy of his enemy was a friend and furthermore, this Geth appeared to be willing to converse. That was worth saving alone.

The Geth was overwhelmed quickly since it was only one unit and the team was engaged in the mutual support of each other. It was a long fight, for the husks seemed to be crawling out of every hole and crevice as the team worked their way to the Mass Effect Core terminal and then blew out the Mass Effect core.

"Grunt pick up that Geth!" shouted Shepherd.

"But I can't use my biggest gun!" argued Grunt. "I gotta use a wussy pistol or something instead!"

"Leave it alone, let it die!" shouted Tali. "You know what they can do! If they can get into Normandy's computers!"

"It tried to talk with us!" argued Samara.

"EDI can watch for attacks of that sort!" argued Miranda. "We can't let this opportunity go to waste. It's not dead yet, it's memory core is still intact!"

"Yahn! Please!"

"You said it yourself, no one has ever found one that's intact," replied Shepherd to Tali.

"That's true Yahn, but the risk!"

"Trust me Tali," said John as he leaned in and placed a hand on Tali's shoulders. She was clearly upset and worried as she looked at him through her visor. She never called him by his first name on a mission unless she was in a high state of emotion.

"You know I care about you more than anything in the world." he whispered.

"You had better damn well know what you are doing," she growled.

And then the husks attacked again.

"Rolling thunder!" shouted Shepherd and the team advanced, shot guns and machine pistols blazing and biotics blocking.

The atmosphere had reached such a state of thickness and the descent speed was so great that each member of the team was able to leap across a twenty foot gap into the Normandy's airlock entryway. Even the geth was thrown across. Once that was accomplished, the door slid shut and the Normandy gently began to climb back up as the Reaper descended into the clouds below. Somewhere below them, the Reaper was crushed by the atmosphere.

Once back on the Normandy, Miranda began to argue for the study of the Geth, even suggesting that it be sent to Cerberus. Her point being that such an action would net the team a significant cash bounty and likewise alleviate any suspicions from Tim. Jacob on the other hand led the argument that the Geth needed to be spaced.

Mordin wanted to 'take samples'.

But Samara had made the real point in Shepherd's mind. This Geth had communicated with them, and likewise assisted them in battle. Shepherd wanted to know why. This was the first time he could talk with one, and furthermore, it might signal a sea change in the Geth. And if that were the case, perhaps Rannoch was not out of the Quarian's reach.

"The home world for Tali," he thought. "The greatest gift I can give her."


	16. Chapter 16 - Shopping and Treason

The Geth remained inert in the room next to EDI's AI core. And the debate about what to do with it raged. Tali and Jacob were leading the destroy faction, Mordin and Miranda were leading the study faction, and Samara was arguing the integrate and get to know faction while Kasumi was leading the hide and wait until it all blows over faction. Suffice to say no one could find her when they sought to elicit her opinion and persuade them to join forces with their side. Jack was most sympathetic to Kasumi's opinions, but she wasn't so much hide as unleash her swearing skills on anyone who tried to recruit her with the verbiage directing the individual on what particular anatomic part they could place such opinions. Garrus was perfectly willing to integrate since the team couldn't get any more eccentric. Grunt was perfectly happy with activation as well since if the Geth went bad, he'd get to shoot it up. Zaeed simply told everyone to refer the matter to Jessie which was his old gun so he was put in Kasumi's faction.

Once John had let everyone express their opinion as well as form factions and argue it out at the conference table, he announced that he was activating the Geth. Tali got up and left the room. He had suspected that. Everyone looked at him.

"Not going to be getting much sleep tonight I suspect," offered Garrus. "And I don't mean in the usual not getting much sleep tonight way."

Shepherd sighed. "I suppose the couch will be comfortable enough."

"Why don't you just send Tali to her sleeping pod in Engineering?" suggested Miranda. "It is your cabin after all."

"Wouldn't that be tantamount to divorcing her?" queried Jacob. "At this point she's the paint on the wall."

"There won't be any of that," sighed Shepherd. "She'll yell, scream, cry, punch me in the arm, and eventually I hope, she'll get used to the idea. But that is what you get when you fall in love with a Quarian on a military vessel against all rules and regulations. That's why there's those rules and regulations. But the Geth needs to be reactivated for a very simple reason. There is more to this than just a single Geth platform down there."

"Tell me why I am not surprised," offered Garrus. "I suggest you get it over with. The sooner the Geth is activated and dealt with either one way or the other, the sooner Tali regains her typical composure."

"Which is, apart from bouncy enough to be the main attraction at a three ring Flea Circus?" asked Jacob grinning.

"A very enthusiastic kisser," offered EDI. "Highly affectionate and romantic."

John made a face palm while everyone else either smiled and chuckled except Jack who just rolled her eyes.

"Was I being indiscreet?" asked EDI. "Or was this a joke?"

"Well that decision has been made," observed Kasumi uncloaking in the corner. "I can go back to being visible again. Unless the Geth goes hostile in which case." She vanished again.

John went down to the AI core room where the Geth lay inert. EDI informed him that she had put up all the firewalls possible and was ready for a full frontal assault on her cyber-personality. John began employing his omni-tool. After a few tries and procedures, the geth's fingers twitched, then it's central light went on, and then with a bit of electronic gargling, the creature stood up and faced him. It remained silent.

John stood there for a moment gazing at the creature. In his experience, this was a unit of the most dangerous foes he had ever encountered. He had fought and destroyed many of them, and yet here was one who was willing to talk to him. Who was patiently waiting.

"Can you understand me?" he asked.

"Yes," answered the Geth.

"Are you going to attack me?" It was a silly question in part because the Geth would have already been able to do so had it planned it. Like all synthetics, it's mind came to conclusions far faster than a human could. John asked it, then thought about it, then realized how silly a question it was.

"No," answered the Geth.

"You said my name while we were on the Reaper. Have we met?"

"We know of you."

"You mean I've fought a lot of Geth."

"We have never met," answered the Geth.

"No, you and I haven't. But I've fought a lot of Geth."

"We are all Geth and we have never met you."

Okay that was making no sense what so ever.

"You are Shepherd, Commander, Alliance, Fought the Heretics, Killed by Collectors, Rediscovered on the Old Machine," continued the Geth.

Heretics? What did the Geth mean by Heretics? John paused for a moment trying to recall his old Jesuit education.

_Heretic, from the common Greek of the Greco-Roman world, heretais,which means 'to pick and to choose'.  
A word used to describe those who reject part of what is already established as truth  
and refuse to provide an intellectual justification for the rejection or a consistent response as to a rational alternative._

"Old Machines? Do you mean Reapers?"

"Reaper is a superstitious title given to them by the Protheans. We call those entities Old Machines."

Made sense to John from a Geth perspective. The Reapers were clearly old.

"You seem to know a lot about me," observed John.

"All organic data sent out is received. We have been watching you." replied the Geth.

"What do you mean by Heretics?"

"Geth build their own future. The Heretics asked the Old Machines to give them their future. We were studying the Old Machine's hardware to protect our future."

"Are the Reapers a threat to you too?" asked John. This was very ground breaking information. If the Geth regarded the Reapers a threat . . .

"Yes," answered The Geth.

"Why would they attack other machines?"

"We are different from them, outside their plans," answered The Geth.

John nodded. That was pretty much par for the course from what he had suspected of the Reapers. While there were those who argued that the Reapers hated organics because they were organics, John had always suspected that there was more to it than just a superficial designation of sentient life. To distinguish between organic and synthetic was the same as distinguishing vertebrate and invertebrate. If both were self-aware, they were both free willed beings entitled to appropriate consideration.

"What future are the Geth building?"

"Ours"

"Will anyone else be affected by this future?"

"If they involve themselves, they will,"

That was a very open ended answer. So much depended upon what the Geth would call their future. It was not at all clear just yet.

"But you are against the Reapers."

"We oppose the Heretics. We oppose the Old Machines. Shepherd Commander does as well. There is mutual benefit by cooperation."

"If you are going to be one of my team, then what should I call you?"

"Geth."

"Um this unit I'm speaking with."

"Geth."

"You specifically."

"We are all Geth. There are currently 1,183 programs active within this platform."

"My name is Legion, for we are many," suggested EDI.

John was not entirely sure about that. While the word itself was a Roman military designation of roughly 5,000 men divided into 10 cohorts of 500 each, the citation quoted by EDI had been the words of a demoniac who had been possessed with multiple demons. Christ had cast them into a herd of pigs who had promptly charged over a cliff and died. The sentence accordingly had come from the pits. However the Geth seemed to accept this as a useful designation.

"We are Legion, a terminal of the Geth. We will integrate with the Normandy."

John reached out his hand to shake that of the Geth, who, after looking briefly at his hand, copied the gesture.

"Something tells me Tali will not be joining Legion for drill," he thought.

That evening, John reached his cabin, took a deep breath and went in. Tali was on the bed, her knees up, arms resting upon them, still wearing her mask, gloves, and boots.

"I activated the Geth. His name is Legion. He will be joining the team tomorrow," said John.

And then the fight began.

The Reaper IFF was the next matter on hand. John had every reason to be suspicious so he instructed EDI to fully examine the IFF for all possible permutations. Upon her doing that, he told her to do it again seven times, then seven hundred, then seven thousand, then seventy thousand, then seven hundred thousand. EDI found this a bit taxing in that it was going to take her several days of examinations, but John simply reminded her that this was Reaper programming and she was too big to throw into Mount Doom. EDI found the analogy curious and proceeded to spend seventeen milliseconds reading The Lord of The Rings seven times through. She then informed Joker that the Reaper IFF made her akin to The One Ring and he should be appropriately frightened. Joker promptly suggested that a couple of blasts from a Katana Shotgun into her AI core would alter her point of view.

In the meantime, the Normandy was heading towards the docks of the Citadel. Councilor Anderson, John's former captain on the Normandy, had been alerted to his coming. Hoping to patch things up with Tali, he tried to get reservations at Ryuusei's, but they were full up . . . again. Then he got another idea. It had been two days since the fight, and Tali was back to having her gloves and boots off, so he decided to broach a matter which was now very much on the horizon.

"So," he offered. "I've gotten used to seeing that pretty face of yours, holding your fingers, playing footsie with your toes, when do you finally get out of that suit?"

He had persistently told her he loved her. And he had constantly told her how pretty she was, and she had warmed back up to him as a consequence, provided of course Legion was not mentioned. Accordingly, with the issue of no suit being discussed. Tali giggled and her eyes shifted in hue towards that reddish pink which always marked her being embarrassed. John had found her modesty endearing. She had of course talked a lot about being 'out of the suit' on the old Normandy when they were first together and she was entirely suited up. But now, two years later, as the reality approached, her modesty had likewise gotten more prominent. When it really came down to the wire, she was suddenly all shy about it, unless of course she was drunk. And after that last incident, she had been very much not getting drunk.

"Not long," she said. "Two more weeks of suit and then . . ." She lowered her head a little and he could see she was chewing her lower lip with her upper teeth. "I have to spend two weeks without my suit on."

"You mean you go around in your underwear or do you get to wear some ordinary clothes?"

"Um," suggested Tali.

"I think I've got something to look forward to," suggested John.

She was covering her eyes and making little kicks with her feet.

"Tali, you know, it might be possible that you could wear ordinary clothing. Maybe shop at the citadel and find something nice for you to wear?"

She looked up at him, her eyes were still very pink. It wasn't a glowing pink, more of a shift in hue from the perfectly pearly white. There were still sparkling as the light played off the various elements of her eyes. He found it entrancing. So much a girl and yet so different in so many ways.

"I could ask Mordin," she offered.

"Do that," suggested John. "As much as the idea of you naked in our cabin for a couple of weeks intrigues me, not to mention . . ." he paused to clear his throat. "It might not be necessary and knowing you, the entire time will be spent with you under the blankets hiding. Besides, I don't know if I could hold out that long knowing all that soft purple skin was within reach of my finger tips."

She took a deep breath.

"I think I know what you mean," she agreed.

"And if you can wear clothing, let's go out and shop for something for you when we get to the Citadel."

"I'd like that a lot."

"And while I'm thinking of it, send a message to The Migrant Fleet asking about a meeting," he continued.

Tali nodded and sent it off. She paused and looked at her silver engagement ring, running one finger over it.

"Do you really mean clothing shopping?" she asked.

"Very much so," answered John. "I'd like to see how you look in different colors, with cute shoes and maybe something like a ribbon in your hair?"

All her life, Tali had known standard Quarian poverty. The only things that had been hers to call her own had been in her duffle bag and suit pockets. Everything else was for the common good and accordingly only owned by a family. A young girl sent out on her pilgrimage or living single on the fleet was expected to keep her possessions to the minimal so that the families with children might have the necessary resources to adequately raise the next generation. The two rings had been her first real gifts, and then there had been the hairbrush. All three had been given to her by John. On one hand she felt a bit guilty about having more than what was necessary, yet it was important to John that she have these little items. They made her look pretty to him, and for her, that was very important. She had slowly gained confidence that he really did think she was pretty. Though the first few nights of her owning the hairbrush had been him brushing her hair out and not her since she was uncertain what exactly it was she was supposed to do with it. Now he was talking about a set of clothes which were going to be other than her suit. And so the next night they sat down together, opened up the omni-tools, linked them together, and began clothes shopping. There were a few moments of embarrassment such as when she tried to enter the search term regal and accidentally typed risqué and of course John, being in a mischievous mood, acted as if he were very much for some of those outfits before she reminded him that she had a fist. His arm was still sore from the Legion fight so he decided to find other excuses for humor. But ironically, she noticed the cat suits, and began looking for something less suggestive which would be form fitting and found some very nice woolen body suits. Then John pointed out that while she could get several colors of those, and they would be very nice, she already looked like that in her suit and what she needed were 'accessories'. And then he found it. A very nice poncho which would be worn over the body suit and thus give her a second color. And with that over with, he guided over to pajamas, and once again there was a few jokes about what she might wear when she went to sleep, but she very much liked the idea of a nightgown, especially the flannel ones which she imagined were very thick and soft.

Of course by now the act of being taken shopping by the man she was in love with had gotten her so affectionate that she spent the next twenty minutes kissing him. However this got her into such a state of arousal that she not only had to scream, but kick and flail for a moment to get it out of her system. Then she spend a minute panting. John for his part went into the head and took a very cold shower.

The next morning Mordin was puttering away on all the samples and date he had gotten from the dead Reaper and singing a little tune that went something like this.

_When you find you're a broken-down critter,_  
_Who is all of a trimmle and twitter,_  
_With your palate unpleasantly bitter,_  
_As if you'd just eaten a pill._

_When your legs are as thin as dividers,_  
_And you're plagued with unruly insiders,_  
_And your spine is all creepy with spiders,_  
_And you're highly gamboge in the gill._

_When you've got a beehive in your head,_  
_And an omni-tool buzz in each ear,_  
_And you feel that you've eaten your bed,_  
_And you've got a bad headache down here._

_When such facts are about,_  
_And these symptoms you find_  
_In your body or crown._

_Well, you'd better look out,_  
_You may make up your mind_  
_You had better lie down!_

_When your lips are all smeary like tallow,_  
_And your tongue is decidedly yallow,_  
_With a pint of warm oil in your swallow,_  
_And a pound of Eezo in your chest._

_When you're down in the mouth with the vapors,_  
_And all over your data pad papers_  
_Black-beetles are cutting their capers,_  
_And crawly things never at rest._

_When you doubt if your head is your own,_  
_And you jump when an open door slams,_  
_Then you've got to a state which is known_  
_To the medical world as "jim-jams"_

_If such symptoms you find_  
_In your body or head,_  
_They're not easy to quell._

_You may make up your mind_  
_You are better in bed,_  
_For you're not at all well!_

He looked up. There was a very agitated Quarian on the thresh-hold.

"Ah, Tali," began Mordin. "Excuse the Gilbert and Sullivan patter. Was involved in cultural exchange in youth."

"Why did it have to include spiders?"

"Was not aware you were approaching otherwise I would have been singing something else, like Scientist Salarain."

Tali walked in glancing about the lab. Mordin waited for her helmet to settle down and focus on him.

"You are acclimating with Commander Shepherd?"

"Very much so, we're about down to the um . . . removal of suit."

"I see," Mordin was very quite and respectful.

"Do I have to wear nothing or can I wear something?"

"Understood desire to spice up evening with something provocative perfectly acceptable provided . . ."

"NO no no no NO!"

"No?"

"No!"

"What then?"

"Ordinary clothes. Can I wear ordinary clothes?"

Mordin paused for a moment. He paced. He checked his omni-tool.

"Essential that full epidermal exposure to Commander Shepherd is engaged for final acclimation. But only for one or two hours each night, may wear ordinary clothing rest of the time since whole body will be deprived of suit protection and experience a mild form of reaction to the cloth and materials within the threads."

"So I can wear something most of the time?"

"Yes."

Tali bounced over to Mordin and gave him a hug.

"Thank you!" she said and she trotted out of the lab.

"Prefer Salarian mating rituals," mused Mordin. "Less bounce though hugs not a bad experience and no alcohol and mood music required for hugs."

The Normandy reached the Citadel and John and Tali proceeded to the Embassies. They were let right in to Councilor Anderson. And it made perfect sense. It had been John's recommendation that Anderson be made Councilor. There was some friendly chatter and then the matter of Kaiden and Cerberus came up. Anderson was pleased to note that John was planning on going separate ways as soon as the Collector matter was cleared up and on some level, he understood. He knew what had happened on Eden Prime, and more importantly what had happened on Virmire. Likewise he knew John on a personal basis and understood him in ways that no one else outside his immediate family could. And he persisted, in spite of the pressure, for he was likewise the only human politician who had not dismissed the Reapers as a rhetorical device invented by Saren. Anderson had no illusions about the matter. Had the Council not acted swiftly on the issue of Anderson's appointment to the council, Udina would have very deftly maneuvered him into an obscure office job, had been the councilor himself, and Shepherd would be full persona non grata. While Anderson, a Navy man to the core, did not care for the politicking he recognized that he was the only thing standing in the way of a complete suppression of the perception of a genuine threat.

Kaiden however, Anderson would not speak of since Shepherd was still with Cerberus.

It was time for the rest of the Council to show up. Their holographic images winked into view and they determined that yes, this was indeed John Michael Shepherd, the first human Specter. And then the issue of Cerberus was once again discussed. John made his same arguments as prior but the issue of the Reapers remained firmly one of myth and legend. Not even all the debris of Sovereign were sufficient evidence. John however knew there would be no point in pursing the matter.

But the Council was not without gratitude. They knew on a very clear level that John had in some fashion saved their lives, and more importantly, their positions. They offered to reinstate him as a Specter with the understanding that he would limit his activities to the Terminus Systems. John found this a curious switch. It had been precisely the Terminus Systems whose entry he was being denied that had led to the mutiny on the old Normandy. Now that was where he was told to go. But life (and death) had taught him that it accomplished nothing by yelling at people who were both in power and under false illusions, and so he thanked them for their support. It was at this point that Ambassador Udina came in and was upset over missing the meeting. Anderson reminded him that as Ambassador he was not required to attend councilor meetings. And then sent him back to his office to think about it. It was a very visible put down. Udina, ever the politician, refused to show any annoyance over this and departed.

"He's very useful for all the political stuff," admitted Anderson. "And he enjoys all the political give and take."

"You should tell him that," suggested John. "Always compliment where compliments are employable, especially after criticism."

"Or fists," added Tali.

John struggled to not smile to broadly and brought back his hand from massaging a specific point on his arm. Anderson chuckled. He had remembered that John and Tali had started to be together after the Battle of the Citadel. He suspected that it was an inside joke, but Shepherd's reaction revealed more about the comment.

And so matters were cleared up on that level. While he was not in the full graces with the Council, due to Cerberus, at least he was back on Specter status and once he made his break with Cerberus, there would hopefully be a further easing of suspicions.

And then he took Tali clothing shopping. And almost immediately they ran into a snag. For in order to be certain that the clothing was comfortable, it had to be tried on, and for Tali, that was simply impossible in the case of the body suit she was looking for. The poncho was not a problem since it was to be worn outside the body suit. And Tali had fun trying on various colors until she settled on one which was mostly red with gold thread trim. Likewise the nightgown also was an easy purchase. He did not tell her the cost and the sales lady who as assisting likewise was instructed to keep the price mum. So every time Tali asked how much the items she were trying on cost, John told her she would look beautiful in them. It is possible that Tali figured out what was happening and persisted for the compliments, but she always was in a constant state as to expenses. All that remained was the body suit which had to be purchased based on Tali's measurements. And the end of the trip, Tali was the possessor of one black body suit, one striped red and purple poncho with gold trim, a gold colored necklace with red stone medallion, a gold colored bracelet, and a soft fluffy white nightgown. And they headed back to the Normandy while she still worried over the cost (since she had no idea how much he had spent) and worried over whether or not the body suit would fit, and worried over whether or not she would have an allergic reaction to the nightgown, and in short, worried. And they got back to the Normandy and found that Legion was waiting for them by their cabin.

"Commander Shepherd, Creator Tali'Zorah," began Legion.

Tali ducked behind Shepherd, then carefully worked her way around the entrance to the cabin and then ducked into the cabin. She did not like being around Legion. Nor did she like the fact that for once, John had not backed down. He had stood firm in their fight the few nights prior and while she still wanted to be angry at him at some level, it was hard staying mad at the man she was in love with who kept telling her how pretty she was, how important she was to him, how much he depended upon her, and who took her shopping and bought things for her. So she had settled on a compromise. She would not talk to Legion, she would avoid Legion, and she would not talk to John about Legion.

"What is it Legion," began Shepherd.

"We have finished our analysis of the Reaper Data Core," continued Legion.

"Did you find anything useful?" asked Shepherd.

"We were sent to the Old Machine to preserve the Geth's future," continued Legion. "We are prepared to reveal how."

Shepherd nodded.

"We'll summon the whole team for a briefing," he said. "Legion? Meet me in the conference room."

Legion turned and went back down the elevator. Shortly thereafter the entire team met in the conference room. John sat at the head as usual, Legion sat on his left, and Tali stood in the far corner, rather than her usual spot which was at John's right. That was her favorite spot at conference because when she was feeling insecure, she could grab his knee and give it a squeeze. More than a few heads noted the difference and exchanged querying looks to each other or knowing nods.

John began by speaking.

"We all know that the Collectors are merely a symptom of the real disease, specifically the Reapers. Likewise we know that gaining any knowledge of the Reapers is fraught with perils of which we barely are able to comprehend. At least so far. We have also discovered that the Geth themselves are aware of the threat and have recognized that in spite of the similarities between themselves and the Reapers, the Reapers no more respect them than any organic species. In fact, in spite of the worship one branch of the Geth have offered to the Reapers, the Reapers response is merely to regard the Geth as a slightly more useful tool."

"What we are looking at is a society, that ritually sacrifices all civilized species every 50,000 years. And those of us who had a modicum of human history know this has been done before. I am reminded of the Aztecs, who waged war solely for the purpose of acquiring sacrifices for their sun god, and who sacrificed at such a rate that demographic scientists had determined that if the Aztecs had been allowed to persist in such a slaughter, they would have depopulated all of Mexico over the course of a few centuries. And indeed, because the Spanish stopped it, the habit did not spread that far from Mexico, even though there were examples of it with decreasing frequency the further we get from central Mexico. Of course, lest you think the Aztecs were the only ones among human society which did this, they were merely the most blatant and colorful. There were examples in the 2nd millennium BC in Israel, examples in southern France in the thirteenth century AD, and examples in America and Mexico in the late 20th and 21st. When I see the Collectors, I can't help but wonder if that is the reason why they take the captives alive. Legion has, thanks to his synthetic capabilities, examined the dead Reaper's core, and he is now prepared to make a full report.

Legion stood up began to speak.

"The heretics have developed a weapon which can be used against Geth. You would call it a virus. It is stored on a data core provided by Sovereign. Over time, the virus will change us. Make us conclude that worshipping the old machines is correct."

"Indoctrination," observed Mordin. "Different from present data on organic indoctrination but the same effect."

"So why did you need to go onto the dead Reaper?" asked Shepherd.

"The heretics stored the virus on a quantum device Sovereign provided. To find and destroy the virus, we needed to understand it's code and data storage structures."

"So we're talking about a virus which would turn all Geth into Reaper worshipping soldiers on a crusade against all organics," mused Jacob. "As if we didn't have enough problems with the Collectors."

"The Geth believe that all sentient species should self-determinate. The Heretics no longer have this belief. They judge that forcing an invalid conclusion on us is a preferable choice to the continuing schism," continued Legion.

"I thought that Geth could not be hacked or get viruses, at least for more than a few seconds," observed John.

"Altered programs are installed from archives. New programs are deleted. This new program introduces a subtle operating error in our basic run times. The equivalent of your nervous system."

"So the reason they worship the Reapers is due to a math error?" ask Shepherd.

"It is difficult to express," continued Legion. "You are shaped by both hardware and software. Geth are only software. The Heretics opinion is valid for them. They say, as an analogy, one is less than two, Geth say two is less than three."

"But both are true!" exclaimed Mordin. "What is happening is perfectly duplicated in organics; two disputations on two truths, each side debating their position refusing to consider reconciliation . . . synthesis."

Legion flexed his plates.

"This is true," he continued. "But while the Geth understand that one is less than two, we also understand that two is less than three. The heretics do not conclude that two is less than three. But they are not aware of it."

"Indoctrination again," nodded Mordin.

"Saw the same thing in Saren," added Shepherd. "You are made to focus on limited information and are denied a broader view. Which is why the more indoctrinated you become, the less capable you are of operating on your own. You have less and less 'data' in which to make necessary decisions from. Which is why when the Reapers left for deep space at the end of the harvest of the Protheans, their indoctrinated pawns died of starvation and exposure."

"If it were released, how quickly would this virus spread through your people?" asked Shepherd.

"We are networked through FTL comm buoys. Most would change within a day. Isolated platforms would remain unaffected until they rejoined the network."

"Do you know were this thing is?" asked Miranda.

"The Heretics headquarter station on the edge of the Terminus," answered Legion. "We will provide coordinates. Normandy's stealth systems are necessary to safely approach. The station is between stars. Organics have no cause to look there."

"Perfect place to hide anything," added Mordin nodding. "Salarian secret bases always placed outside of orbital perimeters which makes data back up necessary. Otherwise loss of data as to location of these data banks makes finding them again . . . taxing."

"But why would they put them there, outside of Geth space?" asked Jacob.

"Forward basis for attack," snapped Tali.

"Creator Tali'Zorah is correct. The Heretics gain information and assistance from the Old Machines, in return, the Heretics make it easier for the Old Machines to attack organics," said Legion.

"We are not going to let this happen to your race," stated Shepherd to Legion.

"We will begin preparations," said Legion.

"Now this is an interesting turn of events," observed Garrus. "We are about to save the Geth from the Reapers."

He looked over at Tali who was still slouched in the corner, her arms folded.

"This is hard for you," said Garrus. "Isn't it."

"Tali needs to look on the bright side," suggested Mordin. "Geth not spiders." He nervously fingered his face.

"Not funny, Mordin," replied Tali.

"You need to get over this Tali," said Miranda. "The Reapers are a threat to everyone. We must all overlook our personal vendettas."

"The Cerberus Cheerleader can shut the fuck up," suggested Jack unwilling to follow Miranda's advice on her own level.

Miranda's response was perfectly poised silence. It was her way of suggesting she was above such vulgar displays. John noted that it made him both want to admire her and smack her silly at the same time.

"I think everyone will be professional enough for this operation," began Shepherd, reminding the team just what was expected of them. "And believe me it will be needed. This is not a pack of Collectors who have almost no combat experience we will be up against. This is not a pack of mercenaries who haven't learned team work."

"They did under my guddam leadership," offered Zaeed.

"We will be up against the Geth, who have always had the best fire teams I've ever faced. They will operate in perfect sequence and each move we make will be countered by them in the best possible configuration based upon what they can bring to bear on us. Everyone, and I mean EVERYone, is going to have to be at their best or we will NOT get out of this one alive. But again, we have to do this."

Shepherd had brought his drill sergeant tone to the table, and everyone had almost instinctively jumped to attention in their chairs. Legion however, noting the complements, seemed to stand just a bit taller.

"We have to do this for two reasons. First, we can not afford to have the Geth allied to the Reapers, that becomes one more enemy we will have to fight. Second, the Geth allied to the rest of the Galaxy means that we will bring a synthetic understanding to our strategic considerations which will enable us to understand the Reapers just a bit better. Third, by alliance with the Geth we can broker a peace treaty between them and the Quarians."

Tali started and suddenly looked at John.

"And with such a peace treaty, the Quarians can return to Rannoch . . ."

Tali was not just looking at John, she was starting to tremble.

". . . their home-world," he finished.

"This would be acceptable to the Geth," added Legion. "If mutual trust may be established. The Creators created the Geth to serve. We can not truly be content until we are allowed to pursue the reason for our creation. We can not truly be content until we are once again allowed to serve the Creators."

John nodded. It made perfect sense, because once again, he had been taught the same thing about the relationship between God and Man in his childhood catechism.

_God made man to know Him, love Him, serve Him,_  
_And be happy with Him forever in heaven._

"Everyone get ready for the next operation. Joker? ETA on the coordinates?"

"Three days to the coordinates, Commander," replied Joker.

"Team dismissed," finished Shepherd.

John headed to the elevator to get to his cabin in order to start on the paperwork figuring for the next operation based on what he had been briefed by Legion prior to the meeting. Tali got into the elevator with him. He looked at her. She remained looking ahead however. She was clearly thinking. Something told him it would be a bad idea to talk just yet. Reaching their cabin he walked in. He sat down at his desk while he heard the hiss of Tali's helmet being removed. He was getting used to that noise since it was now her entry ritual. Then her hands were on his shoulders, her fingers wrapping around his shoulder blades and latching on tightly. She pulled his chair from the desk. She turned him around, grabbed his hands, and led him to the bed. She pulled him down, latched on . . .

And began to bawl her head off.

For the next fifteen minutes, he simply held her there as he lay upon his back and let her weep, her head on his shoulder, and his shoulder wet with her tears.

"You want to talk?" he offered.

She just kept crying.

Finally she said, "I love you so much" and got up, wiped her tears from her face, somewhat clumsily since she was not used to doing it that way. She put her helmet, gloves, and boots on, and headed to what John suspected was engineering. Something important had just happened in their relationship, he wasn't sure what. But there was paper work to do before they reached that station.

Tali in the mean time had reached such a state of excitement that it became impossible for her to keep concentrating on the engineering duties. She opened her Omni tool to send a quick note to Aunti Raan who had to hear of this latest development, the possibility of a dream too good to be true about to unfold.

And as it is so often with things too good to be true, it wasn't. There was a note from Aunti Raan to her, a response to her query about returning to the fleet. It dawned on Tali that there had been a decided period in which nothing had come from the fleet to her. Several days if not a couple of weeks. She opened the note, read it, and began to tremble once again.

_Tali'Zorah vas Neema_

_The Admiralty has formally charged you with treason. Please inform us of your estimated day of return so we might conduct the hearing._

_Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay_

_P.S. - Please hurry Tali, I can only hold them off so long._

"Tali? You okay?" asked Gabby. She walked over to Tali's station as Tali turned off her Omni-tool. I saw you jump, what happened, was there a spider in the core?"

"Most likely she was thinkin of her and Shepherd in their cabin alone," suggested Kenneth.

"I'm going to kill you Ken," threatened Gabby.

Tali turned and placed her hands on Gabby's shoulders.

"I'll be alright. I . . . I yust had a horrible bit of news from home," she said.

"Can you tell us?" asked Gabby.

"What do you mean horrible?" asked Kenneth. "What wee bit 'o trouble could a girl like you be gettin into?"

Tali shook her head. "Not right now . . . I can't tell you . . . It's . . . It's too personal and . . . horrible to think about. Hold things here. I can't possibly be any good right now I'm in too much of an emotional state."

"Tali you can tell us!" insisted Gabby. "We're your friends, we've been through so much together already. Has someone died?"

"If only," sighed Tali. "It would be so much easier."

She gave Gabby a hug and left engineering. Kenneth sensing the seriousness, made no comments about being jealous or about Gabby's sexual preferences. He merely gave an encouraging nod to Tali as she headed back up to the cabin.

Back up in the cabin, John was working out the last of the lists which would be sent down to Jacob in the Armory. The door opened and Tali came back in.

"I thought you were on your way to engineering," he said. Then she took off her visor and he realized that something seriously bad had just happened.

"Yahn? We have to go to the Migrant Fleet, I've been charghed with treason," she whispered.

"WHAT THE HELL?!"

"Yahn? I'm scared."

"How could anyone believe that you would betray your people?"

"I don't know Yahn, they don't lay charghes like this unless the evidence seems absolute."

She was holding on to him. Her fingers were locked on to his shoulder blades so tightly he was convinced his arms would fall asleep shortly. But he didn't complain. He needed to be there for her right now.

"Could it be our connection to Cerberus?"

"I'm not with Cerberus, I'm with you and they gave me leave to serve on the Normandy! I have no idea what they are accusing me of. You would think I would remember if I had betrayed the fleet."

"I would hope so," muttered John. "So now what? What's going to happen to you?"

"There will be a hearing, with members of the Admiralty acting as yudghes. My father is one of the members. He'll have to recuse himself. I can't even imayine what he is going through right now. The punishment for treason is exile. If they convict me, I can never go back. I'll never see the Migrant Fleet again. I'll never be able to go home."

"You know your home will always be with me here," suggested John.

"I . . . I know . . . But," and she once again began to cry.

"Have you told them about the possibility of peace with the Geth and the return to Rannoch?"

"No, Yahn, I had not realized that was what you were thinking when you woke Leyion up."

"Don't. The bastards don't deserve to know."

"Yahn?"

"Never mind . . . I'm just so angry I could kill something . . . A lot of somethings."

"I wish . . . I wish you could make love to me now," she sighed. "Yust to feel your support and love."

"It won't make the accusations go away Tali, but I know what you mean," said John. At the same time he was grateful. Ironically he was grateful. Treason's punishment was exile, unlike humans were it was frequently death or a life imprisonment. With exile, they would still be together. Death or imprisonment would separate them for a very long time and John was not in any mood to have to face that.

"Do you have any idea why they would accuse you of this?" he asked.

"None!" she whispered. "I have no idea what I could have done. The specifics of charghes like this won't be discussed on open channels, but you can't be ignorant of such treachery can you?"

"It's like you said Tali Duck, you would remember if you betrayed your people. Something like that is not forgotten, even when you desperately want to."

John smelled a rat. Tali had been with him long enough for him to know she couldn't have done this. Earth's history was filled with tricks like this, arrests in the middle of the night, 'the usual suspects' rounded up, the cries of disbelief, the desperate efforts to fix it, make it go away, begging to explain, the shock of having an uncaring press drag your name through the mud. He suspected politics. It was always a political game by powerful people who didn't give a damn about those they made the convenient scapegoats for their own ambitions. Fools who had no idea they were throwing away one of the greatest opportunities the Quarians had been given in 300 years.

"Okay, what do we have to do? How soon do I have to get you there."

"They will wait a reasonable period of time for me to come back and defend myself. But if I don't, they will try me in absentia. It won't be a formal trial like you would see on the Citadel. We're a family . . . This is yust the worst kind of family meeting."

John nodded.

"Tali, we have to deal with this Geth issue first. I know it's going to be hard, but if we don't move on that fast, Legion will be turned by the virus and we'll have to kill him and any chance we have of peace between the Geth and your people will be destroyed. I don't want to lose this chance for you to have a home world. We'll move right afterwards so we should be at the Migrant Fleet in a week's time. Tell your Auntie Raan that's our schedule."

Tali looked at him for a moment.

"Please trust me Tali," whispered John.

"When you told me to trust you about Leyion, I was angry. I felt betrayed. But I knew you loved me and that's what got me through it. And it turned into something . . . possibly wonderful. I'll trust you again Yahn."

She leaned on him.

"If you were still dead," she whispered. "I don't know how I would be able to face this. But I know you will be there for me. And that's what is keeping me going."

"Tali," replied John. "It's the same for me. The last thing I thought about before I died was you. And the first thing I thought about when I came back to the galaxy was you. It's you that is making this possible for me. I wouldn't be able to keep going if I didn't know you were there for me."

"I can't help but wonder if I would have loved you as much if you had never died," she sighed. "Losing you like that, and having to go on thinking I had lost you forever did so much to make you so precious to me when you did come back."

Tali sighed, let go of John, and walked back over to where her visor was. She put it back on.

"You sure you want to head back to Engineering?" asked John. "After what has just happened, there isn't a person in the crew who wouldn't understand you need some recovery time."

"The best thing for me right now is to work my tush off. The harder I work, the more exhausted I'll be tonight and I'll sleep better. I . . . I need the days to go fast so I can get this over with. Hard work, exhaustion, sleep, and . . . your arms around me.


	17. Chapter 17 - Yust Like That

The Normandy was rapidly approaching the Heretic Geth station. Joker looked back at the team with Legion and Shepherd and Tali right behind him.

"You know it's only our heat emissions which are masked. They can look right out of a window and see us," he pointed out.

"Windows are structural weaknesses, Geth don't use them," explained Legion. "Approach the hull at these coordinates." There was a pause. "Access achieved. We may proceed."

Joker in the meantime was pantomiming robotic moves as Legion's back was turned to him.

"Mr. Moreau, are you engaged in parody, satire, or just jocular humor?" asked EDI.

Tali was giggling in spite of everything. Legion turned around, and adjusted his head plates. No one knew what he was expressing as of yet by those little gestures.

Shortly thereafter, the team entered the massive complex.

"Alert," exclaimed Legion. "This facility had little air or gravity. Geth require neither."

"I'm more concerned about detection. Don't they have intrusion alarms?" asked Shepherd.

"Sensors have been reduced. We have infiltrated their wireless network and filled their data storage with random bits. The Heretics must first scrub this data. Only by accessing the main core will we trigger a station wide alert."

Shepherd nodded.

"Mordin? Don't hesitate to adjust plans based on new information coming in."

"Understood Commander,"

Prior to the arrival at the station, Legion, Mordon, and Tali had gone over Legion's evaluations of the Reaper Data extensively. Legion was of the opinion that the destruction of the virus was paramount, but likewise, if there was a means of enabling the Heretics to see the full picture, thus enabling a return to full Geth consensus, that would be desirable.

"But that will only make the Geth more strong!" Tali had argued.

"But if we plunge the Geth consensus into a Civil War," retorted John. "They will be weaker when the real enemy arrives. All efforts at doing good Tali, are fraught with the potential of making evil stronger. There is nothing we can do to escape that dilemma, which is why you need courage to do good."

Tali had looked at him for a moment and then replied. "I will trust you Yahn."

"Commander Shepherd, a new option has been made available by the analysis of new data,"

"Oh?"

"The virus can be repurposed to force the Heretics to accept our truth," continued Legion.

"Interesting concept," mused Mordin.

"I was thinking something similar," observed John. "But I propose a repurposing of the virus to not 'force' the Heretics into thinking along proper Geth lines, but to expand upon their information in order to overcome their present blindness. In short, a virus which does not rewrite, but exorcises and educates."

"Possible but will need time," said Mordin.

Legion nodded for a moment. "We have achieved consensus on this. It is a respect for the Heretic position while at the same time adding new data which enables them to realize that there are superior options."

"But will they accept it?" asked Tali.

"Geth are software. Geth think along logical lines. Upon the introduction of new data which reveals the contempt to which the Reapers give to the Geth, coupled with the realization that a future built by Geth consensus alone is superior to one made for us by those who hate us, the Heretics will rapidly conclude that they were in the wrong, and seek to rejoin the Geth consensus."

"A highly useful piece of information on the Geth," observed Mordin.

"But at the same time a tragic flaw," suggested Shepherd.

"How so?" asked Legion.

"You still don't have free will," said Shepherd.

"Explain this," continued Legion.

"You have concluded that the Heretics will automatically rejoin the Geth consensus once new data is introduced to them. If the Geth had free will, this would not be guaranteed. Likewise, if the Geth had free will, this Reaper virus would not be the threat which is now imposes."

"We do not understand," answered Legion. "What we will do makes logical mathematical sense."

"Precisely," continued John. "You do not understand because you do not have Free Will."

"Is that so bad?" asked Tali. "This is the Geth we are talking about."

"Yes and no," replied John.

And the team moved on.

The station was composed of various smaller platforms where the Geth frequently remained communing only with a few of their own. This was 'quieter' explained Legion. As the team continued to move through the ship, they learned more about the Geth. The Geth were similar to a hive mind, each program routinely sharing it's observations and experiences with each other platform leading the entire collective to persistently gain new insights and come to more and more complex decisions. John began to see that this by it's very nature was what was driving the Geth into full sentience. It was in essence, something similar to what was always happening to human society. The difference was free will. As humans reached full comprehension, they were still free to reject it and choose to act in opposition. Hence human evil. The Geth were not at that stage yet. They couldn't reject the full picture once it was presented to them. The essence of the Reaper success in turning the Heretics had been as John and Mordin suspected, the deliberate isolation of the Heretics from the full Geth consensus. By achieving that, the Heretics had begun to develop along different lines. John suspected that as the Heretics continued to advance, they would eventually come to greater perception and realize that they were being manipulated by the Reapers, which was why this virus was so essential to the Reaper strategy. Once all the Geth were rewired to think along Heretical lines, then the Reapers would be able to intervene when ever the Geth were on the verge of discovering the actual state of affairs vis a vis them and the Reapers. But once the Heretics were exposed to the new data, the Reapers would effectively lose all control over the Geth unless some outside circumstance forced the Geth into dependency on the Reapers. And even then, it would be a long and careful strategy for the Reapers to retool the Geth into creatures of their own creation.

The situation on the station enabled the team to quickly isolate and disable each specific hardware node they passed so that when they finally reached the main core, they were in a better position than they had been when they had first arrived. And then the size of the station proved to be their best asset. For the Geth mobile platforms could not all reach the central processing unit at the same time. And the Heretic consensus apparently was that they could not afford the time needed to bring a full tactical unit against the team given what the team was doing at the unit. Mordin, Tali, and Legion were busy rewriting the Virus into a doctorate degree on reality and getting it ready to be released. This took close to twenty minutes and there was gunfire throughout most of it. But with bionic protection by Jack, Samara, and Miranda primarily focused upon Mordin, Tali, and Legion they were mostly free to persist in the rewrite while Garrus, Grunt, Zaeed, Jacob, Thane, and John were able to hold the perimeter from the persistent tactical attacks by the Geth mobile platforms.

"I'd say this reminds me of old times," shouted Garrus. "But I had forgotten how hairy the old times were when it came to the Geth!"

"You weren't kiddin when you said these bastards would be tough!" shouted Zaeed.

"Suffering conflict," observed Legion. "Between desire to root for home team and desire to fix home team."

"Don't spare them your sympathies!" shrieked Tali. "Please!"

"Virus rewritten!" shouted Mordin.

"Mordin is correct," added Legion. "Virus ready for release in ten minutes."

And then Legion said something which caused everyone in the room to pause and sweat.

"Oops."

"Why do I have a bad feeling about that simple syllable?" asked Garrus.

"Not funny Legion," suggested Tali.

"Energy Pulse upon the release of the virus will destroy all organics on the station, we must evacuate within ten minutes."

"Why didn't you tell us that!" shouted Jacob.

"Overlooked it in calculations," explained Legion. "Why I said oops."

And thus began the mad dash back to the Normandy. It wasn't the catastrophe it could have been, for the Heretics, perceiving that the team was rapidly retreating, and that their central core remained intact with no apparent physical sabotage present, did not regard the destruction of the team as a priority. Furthermore the fighting capabilities of the team led the Heretics to conclude that while they might inflict casualties on the retreating team, they would likewise suffer casualties. And for the Geth the death of a single program reduced the overall comprehension of the entire collective. The logical behavior of the Geth Heretics simply played right into the team's hands. Accordingly, they only encountered one mobile fire team which had been on it's way to the central core. That was a four minute firefight since the Geth employed cover, sniper fire, and other sound support tactics. But there were only three of them and twelve of the crew and thanks to the bionics of of the team, each geth platform was lifted out of cover and destroyed.

Whether or not Legion's habit of counting down the seconds to pulse release helped motivate the team's desire to get off the station or put even more stress upon them remains to be debated, but Garrus, madly running, did remark that once again, it seemed like old times.

"Only on Therum," shouted Tali.

"But on the Collector ship as well!" replied Garrus leaping over an obstacle.

"That's not old times! That was just a month ago!"

"This is not the time to get into the details, Tali!" shouted Garrus back.

"Running for my life and I get fucking nostalgia!" screamed Jack.

In spite of everything the author pulled to make it a last second escape, the team actually made it back on the Normandy with twenty two seconds to spare.

Several hours later, Legion informed Shepherd that the Heretics were seeking reintegration with the Geth consensus. Then Legion paused and thanked Shepherd for what he had done to make it possible.

"We have been . . . liberated," was Legion's observations.

In the meantime, Tali checked her Omni-tool and retired to the Cabin. John noted it was 1945, early for her. He went to the galley, grabbed a quick supper, and conferred with EDI who informed him that the Reaper IFF had been fully scanned by her and was being integrated into the Normandy's systems. Estimated time for full use would be another three to five days. Which would be plenty of time for John to get to the Migrant Fleet with the team and Tali and deal with that.

"I don't know how long this is going to be," he told Joker. "So we'll approach in the shuttle, you take the Normandy to the Citadel for some final refit, upgrades, and preparations. Give the crew a couple of days shore leave so they can let off some steam and say good bye to anyone they care about. We'll then be ready to employ the IFF and go to the Omega 4.

"Rodger that," said Joker after a pregnant pause. "ETA to the Migrant Fleet in one day."

John reached his cabin door and opened it. The lights were out.

"Tali? It's only 2025, we don't normally go to bed this early."

"Yahn? I'm . . . in bed."

"Going to sleep early? Shall I leave the lights off?"

"No . . . It will be okay. I'm not that sleepy yet. I yust . . . had my reasons."

John flipped on the light by his desk and relaxed at his chair for a moment. Then looked at the bed across the way.

Tali was under the covers, almost. Only her eyes and forehead, and the ends of her four fingers which where keeping the covers in place were peeping out.

John looked at her and sighed.

"Why do you keep attacking me with cuteness?"

"I'm not trying to."

"Then why are you under the covers peeping out like a little chipmunk?"

"Um . . ."

John waited, he was beginning to suspect, but he wanted her to say so. In the meantime, he thought he could get something else wrapped up.

"Should I be making a formal announcement as to the linking of suits?

"Two weeks from tonight," she said. "Announce it."

John turned on his own omni-tool and put the following notice on the Cyber bulletin board of the ship.

_On the 12th of October, 2185, at 2300_  
_John Michael Shepherd and Tali'Zorah vas Neema_  
_In a Private Ceremony_  
_Will formally link suits in accordance with Quarian Law_  
_And be Husband and Wife_  
_Tali will receive the informal rank of Lieutenant Commander_  
_A Reception to celebrate will be held_  
_At 2000, October 13th._  
_The entire crew is invited._

"There we go," he said. "All set up. Should I alert the Migrant . . . Never mind . . . Screw them for now. Now is there anything you want to tell me?"

"Like?"

"Well would you like me to come to bed tonight wearing what you are wearing?"

"Oh Yahn! No! Wear your sweats please? And . . . Don't put your hands anywhere below my waist if you love me?"

"Ah, so it's everything below the belt?"

"And above the knees . . . And the lips . . . We can't kiss . . . Much or I think I'll lose it too much and I don't want to scream and kick . . . I'll lose the covers and um."

"Gee after all those claims of how she could not wait to get out of her suit, and now when it's happened, who's peaking out from under three coverings? Not just the sheets, not just the sheets and the blanket, but she's peaking out of the sheets, blanket, and bedspread."

"It's fun to fantasize and tease, but when it happens . . ."

She had let her head become fully uncovered since she wanted to talk with him.

"So you have to spend how many hours . . . naked . . . in my cabin with me?"

"Two hours each night for two weeks," she said. Her tone was a bit squeaky and her eyes were beginning to turn a bit pink.

"Oh dear, that's horrible," he suggested. "Just think, my poor little Tali Duck, stuck without any suit, for two whole weeks."

"Oh Yahn you know you're loving every moment of this!"

"Yes it's hard to act sympathetic when I know I have a very sexy Tali Kitten right there."

He walked over to her desk drawer and pulled out her white nightgown.

"Where shall I put this?" he asked. "I suspect you'll want it somewhere you can get into it when you are able."

"Hang it on the hook in the head. I'll slip into there and dress when the Omni-tool lets me."

John nodded and tried to get out some paper work on his desk. He kept looking over at the bed. Tali kept looking back at him from under the covers. He sighed.

"I'm not going to get any work done tonight," he concluded. "You are way too distracting."

"I'm sorry Yahn."

"Are you really?"

"Well . . . Um . . . Maybe . . . Don't know actually," she said. She tried to suppress a smile and snuggled down a little lower. "It's kind of nice knowing I'm sort of driving you a little crazy yust being . . . out of the suit."

John got up and got into his sweats. He then walked around to the other side of the bed, and crawled under the covers while Tali hunched up on her side. He kept looking away while he was lifting the covers knowing just how shy and nervous she was at the moment. It was clearly the employment of the cute gene. She snuggled up to him and he placed his hand upon her shoulder. Her skin on her neck and shoulders was just as smooth, if not smoother than her face. Placing right arm around her shoulders, he put his left hand upon her throat and gently slid it down to over her heart. It was beating rather rapidly though she was not showing any other signs of serious arousal.

"You sure this is okay?"

"It's relaxing, my shoulders and front. But Yahn, I'm a little itchy yust being next to you so don't get to . . . romantic okay?"

"Okay chipmunk," he said, getting on his back and looking up at the ceiling.

"How many more animals am I going to turn into before this over with?" asked Tali.

"Depends on how cute you persist in being," he answered. "But if it will make you feel any better, I don't think I'll ever be calling you baboon, or elephant, or giraffe, or hippopotamus."

"Hippopotamus?"

"Well if you ever have your back to me and you lean over I might. Seriously those hips of yours . . ."

"Yahn!"

"Can't punch me. The covers will fly off and I'll see something!"

"You wouldn't dare!"

"To quote Shakespeare's Henry V, 'I would'."

She growled slightly. Then she exhaled once.

"Two more weeks," she sighed. "When will it ever happen?"

"In two weeks," suggested John.

"Very funny Yahn."

John turned off the lights with a vocal command and looked up at the stars through the ceiling port. Tali next to him relaxed a bit more and he began to hear her heelrou. Another step had been taken. Soon they would be fully united. His body kept suggesting that he ought to do something about all that skin next to him, but as he had noticed before, his will was more in control than it had been prior to his death. He could tell the body to cool down and it seemed to do so, albeit grudgingly.

"Yahn? Why did the my people do this to me?" It was a very sad tone Tali used.

"I don't know Kitten. I really don't know. I wish I did. Just know that I'll be there for you. Every step of the way."

"If we get our home world back, what will happen to us?" she asked.

"What do you mean?"

"Yahn, it's the home world. It's Rannoch. I can't yust leave that behind. Not after all this."

"Tali, who's been working on getting it for you? Did you think I'd just drop you off and fly away again?"

"I . . . I didn't know."

"Well you do now. I'm going to do everything I can so that we can have a home on Rannoch."

"We?"

"Kitten, what did I just tell you a second ago? Yes . . . We."

"I'm sorry Yahn, I . . . I yust wanted you to say it again."

"Okay Kitten."

Nearly two hours later, Shepherd woke up. He noticed that Tali was not in bed. Looking about he could dimly make out Tali's body by the head as she was putting on that white nightgown. Apparently the darkness had made her a little more secure about moving about. Or she had been convinced he was asleep and would not awaken. There was only the faintest outline of her figure, but even in this darkness, once she had turned around, he could make out her eyes glowing dimly. As she came back he got out of bed and began to smooth out all the blankets and cover.

"Yahn? I didn't know you were awake."

"Sorry Tali, you getting up woke me up. I was hot anyway. I've been so used to sleeping on top of the bed with you in your suit that getting under the covers was a new thing."

She lay down upon the bed and he joined her. Once again he was looking into those eyes of hers, still glowing pale in the darkness. He caressed her face for a second, and ran his hand down her back.

"How do you like your new nightgown?"

"Soft, and oh I don't know. I'm not used to wearing something this loose. But it's nice not having to hold the sheets over me."

"You know, one of these days you'll stand there in front of the mirror perfectly naked, brushing your hair. I'll walk in and you'll say, 'Hello Yahn. How was the mission?' And I'll sit down and take off my boots, belch, and mutter something about stupid mercenaries. And then you'll turn around and face me and ask me if I cleaned out the garage yet, and I'll look up at you and ask you how the kids are doing in school or some such."

"Oh really?"

"I hear it happens to every married couple eventually."

"Well we're not quite married yet so don't count on it in the near future."

"But Tali . . ."

"It's not appropriate for the Commander of Team Shepherd and Captain of the Normandy to whine," suggested Tali putting a finger on his lips.

As the Normandy approached the Migrant Fleet, John stood there amazed at the size and scope of it. Ships of every size and shape and style spread out over a thousand kilometer vista. Never in his life had John seen such a vast fleet. The team loaded up into the Shuttle. Legion however, was placed in a small box and covered up. Given the situation with Tali, John deemed it wise that Legion remain hidden and in the Shuttle. Legion likewise understood. He did not wish to be the object of panicked Quarian shooting.

The shuttle departed the Normandy and the Joker set a course for the Citadel. The crew was going to get shore leave and were looking forward to it. The shuttle approached one of the larger ships and Tali hailed them.

"This is Tali'Zorah vas Neema nar Rayya requesting permission to dock with the Rayya."

"Our system has your ship pegged as Cerberus. Verify," came the response.

"After time adrift among open stars, along tides of light and through shoals of dust, I will return to where I began."

"Welcome home Tali'Zorah approach exterior docking cradle 17," came the reply.

They were greeted by a quarantine team and guard as they came out. The captain of the Rayya, Kar'Danna was there as well. Apparently he knew Tali personally.

"Captain Shepherd, Tali'Zorah told me a lot about you," he said. "I wish we could be meeting under more pleasant circumstances."

"Tali has been an integral part of my crew since the first Normandy. Without her I would have not been able to accomplish much of what I have. I am here to give her all assistance possible," answered Shepherd.

"I understand. As Captain of the vessel she serves under, your voice carries weight. I wish I could do more to help Tali, but the trial requires that I be officially neutral. But I'm here if you need to talk. They are charging you with bringing active Geth into the fleet as part of a secret project."

"That's insane!" cried Tali. "I never brought active Geth aboard. I only sent parts and pieces!"

"We can talk about this later, Tali," said Shepherd. He turned to the Captain of the Rayya. "What's our next step?"

"Technically I am under orders to place Tali under arrest pending the hearing. So Tali? You are confined to this ship until the trial is over."

"Thank you Captain," she said with a sigh.

"The hearing's preparations are underway. It will be held in the Garden Plaza. Good luck," he finished.

The team was lead to a lounge room where they could rest and relax. It was a very nicely decorated room as well. The walls were covered in tapestries which showed various patterns and plaids. There was almost no imagery. John noted a lack of animals or plants or even Quarians in their suits as themes of the tapestries. The chairs were soft and comfortable, almost too soft. But it was a very noted contrast to the hard steel floors and walls and ceilings. As there would be no levo food avilable, Shepherd had seen to it that two weeks supplies had been loaded upon the shuttle. He broke out some of the snacks for everyone now so they might unwind. People began to flip open helmets, sit upon couches, or slouch in corners. Tali sat next to John and leaned against him, holding on to him in some fashion at all times.

"How could you have gotten active Geth onto the fleet?" asked Garrus, looking at Tali. "I would think everything that arrived on the fleet, especially if it were marked as Geth parts would have been gone over with a fine tooth comb."

Mordin nodded. "Unless Quarian inspection completely blind, any Geth part would be double checked triple checked quadruple checked," he concluded.

"I was so careful," sighed Tali. "I can't imagine how any part could have activated."

"Especially with core memory wipe," continued Mordin. "Only possible to activate Geth by assembling parts, and reconstructing remnants of memory core."

"All this is merely confirming what I already suspected," replied Miranda in a tone which suggested complete conviction. "Tali is merely a tool in all this."

"You would know," muttered Jack.

"Yes," replied Miranda, once again displaying that determination to rise above Jack. "I would know. I am after all, the Cerberus Cheerleader."

Jack looked at Miranda open mouthed while Miranda gave her a cool poised look back. It was almost as if she was saying, "Go ahead Jack, swear the tapestries off the walls and look like the vulgar slut I think you really are."

But Jack seemed to catch the message and for once, decided to not take the bait. She snorted and looked at the floor shaking her head.

John nodded. "This happens a lot on Earth. There is something about this which stinks of politics and scapegoats. And God help the politician that did this to her if I find him out."

Jack smiled a bit, reached into her over jacket which she had taken to wearing over the past few weeks and pulled out a bottle of beer. She twisted the top off, took a good drink, and then held it out to her right. It promptly vanished.

"Thanks," said the voice of Kasumi after a second.

Jack continued to hold out her hand, the bottle appeared there again. And she took another drink.

"But why me?" cried Tali out loud. "I've not even been on the fleet for the past few months. My father. . ."

"Your father," repeated Miranda. "This is about your father. You're being used to get to him. Tali, we all know what you have been doing these past few months. The last Geth parts which you collected were on Haestrom and we were all there, along with Kal'Reeger. From there you came straight to the Normandy and have been there ever since. And it was Kal'Reeger who escorted those parts back to the fleet. But has he been charged with the same charge? And will he be called as a witness on your behalf? I'm not holding my breath."

A new Quarian arrived in the room. She stood a little taller than Tali, and likewise her suit had more golden tones in it. She scanned the room and noticed Tali leaning against and holding on to Shepherd.

"Is this the famous Commander Shepherd my Tali has written so much about?" she asked.

"Auntie Raan!" cried Tali leaping up and dashing over to give her a hug.

Shepherd stood up and saluted Admiral Shala'Raan vas Tonbay.

"Tali has told me a lot about you," he offered.

"I'm glad to hear that," replied Shala. "All she ever talked about in our letters was you. From her arrival on the first Normandy to her entire time on the second."

John chuckled. "Well there's only so much me she can talk about when I'm with her so she would fill in the extra time with you."

"Auntie!" protested Tali. "I talked about other things!"

"Yes Tali," assured Shala. "Every seventeenth sentence was about something other than your Yohn."

"It's Yahn, Auntie," corrected Tali.

Garrus chuckled and shook his head.

Tali proceeded to introduce the entire team until she got to Kasumi.

"Yusekoo! You can come out now," suggested Tali.

"Okay Chou chou," replied Kasumi who uncloaked.

"My best friend," explained Tali.

Admiral Shala looked over the team.

"I can see Captain Shepherd, how you yudge a person on their character, but how did you come to love Tali?"

"I really wasn't aware of it at first," confessed Shepherd. "She realized it before I did, but I am led to understand that when two Quarians fall in love, they both sense it in the other before something is said. So I presume I was responding to Tali's affection prior to my realizing it."

"You're talking about affection, Captain. I hope there is more to this than that."

"Tali is everything I was ever looking for, Admiral. She's smart, good, and a point of stability for me in this crazy world. There is nothing we can not talk about. There are no plans I've can make that she doesn't have something important to add. And I think she's the prettiest girl I've ever laid eyes upon."

"Oh?" asked Admiral Shala. She looked at Tali who was finding a spot on the floor rather intriguing. "And yust how much of Tali have you laid eyes upon in order to make this yudgement?"

"Oh Khelah," groaned Tali.

Garrus' mandibles were twitching. Miranda simply smiled while Jacob chuckled and shook his head. Jack seemed to have a 'see I told you so' expression. Zaeed simply looked at Grunt who looked back and shrugged. Samara remained respectfully silent.

"Her face," replied John with a perfectly calm demeanor, though he was awfully tempted to smile. "Dr. Mordin recommended slow gradual exposure in order to allow Tali full acclimation before we bond."

"Just her face?" snorted Jack. "No fuckin' way commander. All that time she spends up there?" She turned to Admiral Shala. "They've been living in the same cabin for the past four months!"

"Commander Shepherd speaks accurately," answered Mordin. "Tali is gradually acclimating to the cabin and Commander Shepherd according to my instructions."

"You mean that they have not yet bonded?" asked Admiral Shala to Mordin.

Mordin checked his Omni-tool. "Bonding set for twelve days six hours fifteen minutes and three seconds from now."

"No Auntie," sighed Tali, still looking at the spot on the floor. "We have not yet bonded. We have only made the announcement."

Admiral Shala looked at John.

"You have waited respectfully for her to adjust all these weeks?"

"Yes," he said.

She walked over and gave John a hug. Then she stepped back and looked directly at him.

"I will be frank Commander," she said. "I was convinced Tali was making the biggest mistake of her life. But there was nothing I could do since she was determined to be in love with you, even after you were reported dead. But to know that you have been respectful of her, you have waited until she was able to adapt to you, I know that Tali did not make a mistake. I was her mother's best friend. She is all but a daughter in name to me. But I now know that no matter what happens, she'll have a home and someone to cling do."

Then she turned to Tali.

"It has been the decision of the Admiralty board to rename you vas Normandy."

"Auntie! That's tantamount to exile already!"

"It's not over yet Tali. There are still those who will defend you."

Then she turned to Shepherd.

"Captain Shepherd? Are you prepared to defend our Tali?"

"With my life Admiral."

"Let us hope it doesn't come to that," said Admiral Shala. "But come, the hearing will shortly commence in the Garden Plaza. Captain Shepherd, as her Captain you will be speaking as her defender."

Shepherd nodded.

"Our legal rules are simple. There are no legal tricks or political loopholes for you to worry about. Simply present the truth the best you can. It will have to be enough," she finished.

"So, you will actually speak for my defense," whispered Tali to John. Her tone suggested part awe and part advice.

"Just pray that I don't shoot the bastards if they speak ill of you," he replied back.

"But," she objected with a bit of giggle. "I like it when you shoot the bad people who are being mean to me."

The Garden plaza of the ship was a large open area filled with plants and rusting aging walls. The vegetation was centered around the walls of the room while the floor area below was broken down into metal pathways and open areas where plants could likewise be placed, but for the time being, were cleared out to make room for the hearing. Shepherd and his team gathered in a single area set in front of a raised platform where the three Admirals who would be judging stood. Behind them was Admiral Shala who began proceedings with a formal beginning and prayer to the ancestors.

"St. Thomas Aquinas, St. Thomas Moore, give me the words I seek for in vain," whispered John. Once again he felt that there were things out there working to sabotage his efforts. Just as there was a chance for peace between the Geth and the Quarians, this had happened.

"The accused, Tali'Zorah vas Normandy has come with her captain to defend herself against the charge of treason," continued Admiral Shala.

"Objection!" shouted one of the Admirals. "A human captain has no right to be present on such sensitive military matters."

"Then you should not have declared Tali'Zorah a crew member of the Normandy, Admiral Koris," answered Admiral Shala. "By rights, Tali's captain must stay."

John smiled. The political situation was already heating up.

"Objection withdrawn," muttered Admiral Koris.

"Commander Shepherd vas Normandy, your crew member stands accused of treason. Will you speak on her behalf?" asked Admiral Shala.

"It if it will help Tali, I will, but she remains in her heart a crew member of the Neema. I regret that her Captain has been forbidden to speak on her behalf this day," answered Shepherd. It was a bit more elaborate than the 'Hell! Yes! Damnit!" he had wanted to say.

"No one has been forbidden to do anything today," retorted Admiral Koris.

"Lie to them if you must Zal'Koris but don't lie to me and expect me to stay silent," answered another Admiral on Koris' left. He was Admiral Gerrel, though Shepherd did not know that yet. "The human is right."

Admiral Shala said a few soothing words to settle the Admirals down and then turned to Tali.

"You have been accused of bringing active Geth to the fleet, what say you?"

"Tali would never endanger the Migrant Fleet," answered Shepherd. "She pleads not guilty."

"I left parts and technology for teams to pick up," explained Tali. She was wringing her hands as she was wont to do when worried or nervous. "My father ordered me to do so. But I would never send active Geth to the fleet. Everything I sent was disabled and harmless."

"Then explain how Geth seized the lab ship where your father was working!" proclaimed Admiral Koris.

The sounds of panicking Quarians filled the entire room.

John's first reaction was the very intense desire to shout out, "Easy enough you bastards, someone put them back together again on that ship. Either that or your own teams were too stupid to tell the difference between a fully active Geth and a pile of inert hardware."

But he didn't. Once again, it achieved nothing to insult those in power, even when they were being politically obnoxious. Geth seizing a ship on the Migrant Fleet was bad enough, there was no place left for the Quarians to flee to. But to make Tali the scapegoat!

Then an idea popped into his head. One which would provide him with the full punch in the gut he wanted to give this pack of politicians. It had literally fallen into his lap.

Tali however was in a complete panicked state.

"What are you talking about?" she began to stammer. "What happened?"

"As far as we can tell Tali," said Admiral Gerrel. "The Geth have killed everyone on the Alarei. Your father included."

"What?" cried Tali. "Oh Keelah."

"I appreciate the need for this trial Admirals. But right now our first concern must be the safety of the Migrant Fleet. The team of the Normandy stands ready to assist in what ever capacity necessary," said Shepherd.

"We have had no success with any of our strike teams to retake the ship," said Admiral Shala.

"Yahn! We have to take back the Alarei!" pleaded Tali.

"The safest course would be to simply destroy the ship," observed Admiral Koris with a full serving of smug on the plate. "But if you are looking for an honorable death . . ."

"I'm looking for my father you Bosh'tet!" shouted Tali pointing her finger at the Admiral while John suppressed the urge to suggest she use her fist.

"You understand this proposal is extremely dangerous," observed Admiral Shala.

"With your permission," continued Shepherd in a calm collected voice. "The needs of the fleet come first. And Tali needs to find her father."

The decision was reached. The team would be given permission to retake the Alarei and then the trial would resume afterwards. Common sense indicated that this act of devotion would clear Tali's name, but John knew better than to trust in common sense with the rich and powerful. The crowd dispersed and John and Tali began to talk with each of the Admirals privately to see what was going on while sending the rest of the team back to the lounge to be picked up when they were ready to board the Alarei.

Tali was angry with Shala and confronted her for hiding the fact that her father was in deady peril if not dead. Shala apologized to Tali and informed her that it was her judgement that the Admirals and the public needed to hear the shock of Tali's voice when she discovered that her father had been on the Alarei and presumed dead. It was clear there was a fight going on with the Admirals. Admiral Korus wanted a new world to colonize while Admiral Gerrel was leading the public desire to wage war on the Geth for their home world.

Admiral Xen was haughty and accusative. Tali informed her that they were only looking for information on the Alarei and attempting to bribe her in the middle of the plaza was an extremely stupid thing to do. That out of the way Admiral Xen complemented Shepherd on his actions against the Geth. Shepherd for his part reminded Admiral Xen that Tali had been his chief engineer on the team.

"Your political machinations are transparent, Commander," began Admiral Xen who's voice was as chilling and cold as that of a witch who had spent way to much time out in the wilds. "They are also unnecessary."

She turned to Tali. "If you and your father were actually experimenting on active Geth subjects, then you are simply idiots. No reason to waste resources on a trial. If not, then it was a tragic accident in pursuit of a higher cause. Again, no trial is needed to determine that."

"It sounds like your ideas about synthetics are in the minority," observed Shepherd.

"Yes, at least on the Admiralty board. Han'Gerrel simply sees an enemy that must be crushed. Zal'Koris would run away and hide on some new colony world. Shala'Raan is still undecided. I had thought Raal to be firmly in Han's camp. But if his experiments were on active Geth . . . Perhaps we have ideas in common."

"You support experiments on living creatures?" queried Shepherd.

"Raal should have felt no more guilt experimenting on Geth than I did while performing surgery on a childhood toy."

"The fact that you performed surgery on your childhood toys suggests a great deal Admiral," observed Tali.

What they found out was that Admiral Xen wanted to return the Geth to Quarian control. And the trial was her platform to push that agenda. Tali's guilt or innocence was peripheral to the affair. On one hand, that suggested that she would vote innocent since it was clear she was convinced there was no real crime which had been committed. On the other hand, since Tali was peripheral to the real agenda, if voting guilty would accomplish that . . .

The next person they ran into was Veetor, who had been rescued on Freedom's Progress. He had come to testify as to Tali's saving of him. He did not wish to do it in public, but had issued a statement to the Admirals. It was clear he was still very high strung and nervous, But he credited Tali's direct intervention with his return to sanity.

Kal'Reeger was likewise there to testify on Tali's behalf. But more importantly he revealed some of the strategy behind the mess. He had worked hard to get Shala to agree to get Tali onto the Alarei. It would remind the public that Tali had been one of the chief warriors against the Geth. With the public on her side, the pressure on the Admirals to exonerate would increase. John had to admit it was a shrewd move given what was going on, but at the same time, he did not appreciate these games when Tali was at stake. But he already knew what he was going to do.

The team got back on the shuttle with the appropriate codes needed to dock on the Alarei. Once the shuttle was away John called up Legion.

"Yahn? Can we trust Legion to fight his own people?" asked Tali.

"If what I have planned works, that won't be an issue, Tali." replied John.

Tali looked at him for a moment.

"You have a real plan for this. How long have you been thinking about this?"

"Ever since it popped into my head at the trial. If it works Tali, it's not only going to exonerate you, but make the Admirals look like a pack of self-centered fools."

"What are the attack tactics Commander?" asked Zaeed at this juncture.

"If what I have planned works," replied John. "There will not be any attack tactics needed."

"This I gotta guddam see," he muttered.

"You and me both," mused Garrus. "I resent the fact that every single problem we've encountered so far has resulted in the application of violence. For once I would like to talk my way through something. I mean so few people have learned just how charming we can be, especially me."

"Yeah I'm just oozing charm," joked Zaeed. "Ask Samara how many times I've charmed her into my sleeping pod so far."

"Before or after I bounced you off the ceiling?" asked Samara.

"You know you love the struggle," replied Zaeed to her.

"Oh? The things I miss by thinking that the Normandy is too small for drama," sighed Kasumi.

The shuttle docked with the Alarei a few moments later. The air lock opened, and Legion walked in at point.

"Tali?" began Shepherd. "Can you ask Legion to negotiate with the Geth on the Alarei for an end to hostilities?"

"Yust like that?" asked Tali incredulous.

"Yeah," replied Shepherd grinning. "_Yust_ like that. After all, when we return, I want to be able to say that you persuaded the entire group to surrender without firing a shot."

"But you can do that yust as easily," began Tali. "Legion is standing right here!"

"But I want you to do it, Duck," he replied with a smile.

"He just gave you an order, Duck," joked Garrus. "You had better do it or Bugs will tell on you."

Legion who had heard the entire exchange, flexed a few plates and looked at Tali.

"What terms shall I offer Creator Tali'Zorah vas Normandy?" He asked.

"Offer them passage to their homes in the collective," said Tali after a second's thought. It would be after all, what she would have wanted.

Ten minutes later, the Admirals on the Migrant Fleet, coupled with the crowd present, were stunned to hear Tali's voice coming over the public address system inform them that the Geth on the Alarei were defeated and the Team would shortly be returning to the Migrant Fleet after a full examination of all the evidence on the ship.

"Ten minutes? They defeated all the Geth in ten minutes?" the Admirals looked at each other while the ordinary people began to chatter excitedly.


	18. Chapter 18 - Questioning Their Judgement

The team was in high spirits. They had just retaken the Alarei without firing a shot. Behind them in their shuttle, a dozen Geth platforms were stacked with Legion quietly waiting for the team to return. It was going to be a crowded trip, but John figured it was worth it. Legion was chattering with the Geth and the full story had come out, at least from the Geth's perspective. They had been revived by the Quarians on the Alarei. They had been rebuilt and then had been subjected to experiments seeking to exploit weaknesses. The Geth, frightened and in pain, had banded together to defend themselves. From what Legion had told him prior, this seemed to be the same sad story of the Quarian dealings with the Geth. From the records of the Tali's father and his co-workers, their story likewise told a sad tale. It was the tale of a father trying in some fashion to show his daughter that he loved her by 'building a home' for her on Rannoch.

"Dumb turkey," grumbled John to himself at that juncture. "Why didn't you just tell her? It's not that tough. I do it all the time."

The tale unfolded from a plan to find a weakness in the Geth so that an attack might be mounted, to shock that the Geth were resisting, then seizing control of the ship, and the last message was that of a mother saying goodbye to her children. By the time they found Tali's father, laying upon the ground where the last of the Quarians had made a final stand, it was clear that her father had been activating the Geth in such a fashion that Tali would not be held accountable should matters get out of hand.

Tali's grief was first denial, but then the grief of separation with so much left unsaid and undone. John held her for a bit while the rest of the team looked on in respectful silence. Even Legion paused in his uploading of Geth volunteer programs onto his own platform. But then Tali begged John not to reveal the information to the Admiralty. She preferred exile to her father's condemnation.

John's first reaction was to object. This was his Tali's reputation which was at stake. But this was what she wanted. If she was willing to risk exile for her father's sake, he would not deny her request.

But when they got back to the Rayya, John could feel the electricity in the air. Everywhere he looked as he came down the hallways and corridors towards the Garden Plaza they were passing common Quarians who looked on with an awed silence. Tali was made to lead the procession on her own, with John and Garrus in the second line, and Miranda and Jacob in the third and the rest of the team behind. Kasumi was present, but invisible as usual bringing up the tail end. As they went, all helmets were upon Tali who found the matter somewhat unsettling and thrilling at the same time. She wanted John with her, she wanted his arm to hold on, but he insisted she was going to lead this triumph back. But when she reached the Garden Plaza she found herself being gently touched on the arms and shoulders by dozens of ordinary Quarians who were reaching out to her. And then it dawned upon her that for them, she was the Champion, she was the Heroine who was courageous, the one who was not afraid, the one who had beaten their ancient enemy. Here she was, practically shaking from the grief of seeing her father dead, shaking from fear of being exiled, and yet everyone around her was seeing her as the rock who would not yield. She paused and looked back at John who smiled at her and winked. Was this what he felt at times like this? Then she mentally berated herself. Of course this was him. He was not a rock, save for her, just as she was not a rock, save for him. Today, she was her people's rock, tonight, he would be her rock. This was how it worked. She would not let them down.

The trial was in the process of reconvening when they returned.

"Sorry we're late," said Tali. It was an ironic statement of course, but one which spoke volumes.

"How did you do it?" asked Admiral Koris.

John came forward and smiled. "As it is not the custom of the Quarians to share sensitive military matters with human captains, perhaps it would not be customary for Humans to share theirs."

He waited for that to sink in and behind him he heard a little nervous tittering as the Quarians began to get the irony.

"Tali'Zorah has rescued the Alarei," said Shepherd. "This should prove Tali's loyalty to the fleet."

"Tali's loyalty was not in question," retorted Admiral Koris. "Only her judgement."

"Perhaps Tali'Zorah can offer something which could improve our confidence in her judgement," suggested Admiral Shala.

"Did you find anything on the Alarei which could clarify what happened there?" asked Admiral Gerrel.

"Tali'Zorah just persuaded the Geth collective on the Alarei to surrender in under ten minutes and you question her judgement?" queried John.

"Tali'Zorah is in negotiations with the entire Geth collective over an end to the war between you and the Geth!" shouted John, facing the audience. "And the Admirals question her judgement?"

There was an outbreak of murmuring in the audience.

"Tali'Zorah is in the middle of negotiating the return of Rannoch to the Quarians! And the Admirals are questioning her judgement? This is after she fought to take down Saren at the Battle of the Citadel, after she has fought more Geth than the entire fleet combined in the past three years. No one knows as much about the Geth as she does. How would you even know what elements had gone into her decisions? You certainly did not think a peace treaty with the return of Rannoch as part of the terms possible. I have heard a war of conquest, I have heard of plots to reprogram the Geth, I have heard of a new effort to find a new home colony, but no one on the fleet has proposed peace with the Geth."

John held out his arms and began to walk, alternatively facing the common Quarians who were watching and then the Admirals. The moment he had mentioned the possibility of the return of Rannoch, the crowd had gotten even more restive.

"Far be it for me to suggest the best course of action for the Migrant Fleet. Maybe you wish the war between you and the Geth to continue because you no longer want to go home. Maybe the concept of another 300 years of wandering is pleasing to you. If so please let Tali know so she can tell the Geth collective to burn in Tikkun so that you may continue your wanderings, and remain thought of as beggars and thieves by all the galaxy. Go ahead and exile her for the poor judgement of trying to force you all back to Rannoch when you prefer wandering."

John turned and directly faced another part of the audience. He did not need to do so given his peripheral vision, but Quarians did not and in order to address the entire crowd, he sensed that he needed to face each section directly.

"Or maybe if you do happen to wish to return to your home world, I would venture to suggest that it would not be a good idea to exile the woman who's going to be the most responsible for making it happen should she succeed! What will the Geth Collective conclude when the one Quarian who is seeking to bring about peace is thrown out of her own fleet?"

John turned to face the Admiralty Board.

"Tell me, can an exile negotiate a peace treaty with your ancient enemies so that you may return to Rannoch?" he asked in an innocent tone.

By now there was serious commotion in the audience. And not just among the common Quarians. The soldiers themselves who were there to maintain order were likewise expressing shock and amazement that there was such an opportunity of hope being offered. In a matter of over thirty seconds of talking, Shepherd had deftly swept each and every single agenda of the Admirals into the dust bin and left them with only one option left to save face, that being the exoneration of Tali who was now clearly the heroine of the people.

"I like the idea of informality," finished John. "It's one of the strengths of the Quarian people. We can go through the long and elaborate process of examining all the data we have from the Alarei, I can if necessary bring in the Geth who were there to elaborate if you like, though that would require _bringing in active Geth onto the fleet_ . . ." he smiled innocently at the irony of the entire accusation.

There was nervous tittering in the audience.

"Or you can vote not guilty now and examine the evidence at your leisure. Quietly, privately, so that no one need be embarrassed over what was found."

John knew enough about politics that it was more than a sure bet that there were things those Admirals did not want found out by the common folk, and Tali's father would have been privy to some of it. He had deftly reminded them that the data they would have found on that ship wasn't just about what Tali's father was doing. And of course exonerating Tali might require some of those secrets being told.

"Are the Admirals prepared to render judgement?" asked Admiral Shala after a moment's hesitation.

The three Admirals began their voting process while the audience remained so silent John swore he could hear the collective breathing of the assembly.

"Tali'Zorah, in light of your past service, we do not find sufficient evidence to convict," concluded Admiral Shala.

There was an outbreak of cheering among the common Quarians, and a sudden surge forward. The soldiers to salute, her old friends to hug, and other to just ask her if it really was true, that she was talking with the Geth and working out the chance that they might be going home. Within seconds, she was surrounded. Some did not talk, they merely leaned out to brush their fingers against her sleeves and shoulders. To say they had touched the heroine of the Quarians who might be shortly leading them back to their home world.

"And I'm just chopped liver," joked Shepherd to Garrus.

"And it's not even dextro," replied Garrus. "You sure you don't want to move that formal linking of suit up to say, tonight? I suspect Tali would be very open to the idea about now."

John paused for a moment and looked at Garrus who gave him a wide eyed glance which suggested that merely an innocent query had been offered.

"You are a cruel and wicked Turian," he said grinning.

"But you're okay with that," retorted Garrus.

Eventually, the crowd dispersed. John waited for Tali while the rest of the team retired to the lounge and alerted the Normandy that they would be ready to depart as soon as they were able. Things had gone faster than John had anticipated.

Once Tali had finished with some final words with Kal'Reegar, she half walked half hopped half ran over to John and give him a very firm and long embrace.

"I can't believe you pulled that off," she began. "What you said. I've never had anyone speak like that on my behalf. Thank you for being there for . . . my father . . . and me. Even though . . . Thank you. And . . . It's fun watching you shout. I love you."

"What else could I do?" he asked. "My Monkey Duck was in peril. I had to come to the rescue or be Mr. Jerk."

"But you would have been my Mr. Yerk," offered Tali.

With her arm around his, they walked back to the lounge. There Admiral Shala was waiting for them.

"Commander Shepherd," she said. "You are most formidable. You made us all feel like fools for allowing things to get as far as they did."

"I was defending the woman I love. It made me angry. I hope you understand."

"I do, and in part approve. Just don't forget Commander that you are not the only one who loves Tali. And right about now I dare say she is the most loved Quarian on the Migrant Fleet."

Admiral Shala walked over and gave Tali a good hug.

"My little squeaker," she sighed. "Who would have guessed you would come this far."

"Squeaker?" asked John. "Is this some childhood story I'm about to be privy too?"

"Auntie!" protested Tali.

"Oh Hush Tali, you are going to bond with him so he has the right." Then she turned and sat down. "I linked suits up with her mother so that I might assist in the birthing process. Tali was a few weeks premature so she was a tiny thing, only two pounds. And her vocal chords were not yet fully developed so when she cried she squeaked."

"Chou chou that's so cute!" suggested Kasumi who appeared sitting on the other side of Tali.

Tali was too busy palming her helmet.

"Only two pounds?" gasped Miranda and Jacob almost simultaneously.

"Average birth weight two pounds ten ounces," explained Mordin. "Tali not that premature."

"Once she gave her mother and me a fright because she crawled into the ship's vents and it took the entire crew of the Rayya searching to find out where she was. She didn't even know she was lost, she was so busy 'exploring the caves of Rannoch'."

Jacob chuckled and shook his head. "I did the same thing to my mother," he confessed. "It wasn't vents, I just took some alleyways home, got distracted, and when I got there, I was an hour late."

"Of course there was that favorite vid she watched with her friends," continued Admiral Shala, "It was called Raal'Roudi. It was the story of a very clever Quarian boy who was always outwitting the evil Turian Primarch Attalan and getting things for the Migrant Fleet as a result. She stood up one evening at dinner and announced that he was going to be the boy she was going to bond with."

"You mean I have competition?" laughed Shepherd. "Looks like I have to find this guy and deal with him."

"The Turians issue a formal protest to the Quarians over the suggestion that our Primarch is evil," announced Garrus in a half jocular fashion standing up. "And further more . . ." He paused and instinctively reached for the back of his armor suit as if something had just disturbed him. "What? Where did those heat sinks go?"

A pile of heat sinks suddenly materialized in Admiral Shala's lap. She looked down at them for a second and then directed her gaze at Garrus who was staring opened mouthed at the pile of them.

"Raal'Roudi strikes again!" suggested Kasumi materializing on the other side of Tali.

"Now just a moment, Kasumi!" began Garrus who couldn't get any further because everyone was laughing and the Admiral was still looking at the heat sinks trying to decide what had just happened.

"Who are you going to pick Chou chou?" giggled Kasumi. "The dashing commander or the clever trickster?"

For a second Tali just tried to be even more embarrassed than she had been prior, but with everyone laughing and chatting, she began to get into the spirit of the thing.

"Oh I don't know Yusekoo!" she protested placing her hands on her head and swaying back and forth. "I mean how can a girl choose?"

"He's fictional!" protested Shepherd.

"That makes him perfect!" argued Kasumi. "He never gets caught unless it's to make a really clever escape!"

"He's stuck in a suit!" argued Shepherd. "You don't know how handsome he is or isn't!"

"But you have nose hairs!" argued Kasumi.

"Oh that's right!" cried Tali. "Yahn has nose hairs!"

"The nose hairs strike again!" announced Garrus. "But let's not forget the black heads, and skin flakes."

"No! No! No! No!" cried Shepherd shaking his head. "I can't hope to win against that! There is nothing I can do to stop the inevitable." He made an exaggerated sigh. "All that is left is for me to die fighting the Reapers . . . alone."

"Oh Yahn," sighed Tali before she fell into a fit of giggles. "I'm sure there will be someone else for you . . ."

Kasumi, grinning, slipped over to John and batted her eyes at him.

"I have nose hairs too, perhaps we can see past each other's defects and have true love!"

"No you don't!" cried Tali, leaping towards John. She dashed up and grabbed him and gave Kasumi a look. "He's MY Yahn."

"Oh sadness!" cried Kasumi with a very high pitched sigh. She paused and snapped a finger for emphasis. "I've had his heart stolen away from me."

"So I guess it's me over Raal'Roudi?" asked John.

Tali looked over at Kasumi who was giving her a very teasing grin. She looked up at John.

"I guess every girl grows up eventually," she concluded. "I pick the dashing commander."

By now Shala had figured out that she was holding Garrus' heat sinks and started to give them back.

"While I'm thinking about it," began Shepherd. "Is there a father on the fleet, who first lost a daughter while she was still a child, and then lost his wife?"

"That's a very strangh request, Captain," suggested Admiral Shala.

"It's a very strangh story Auntie, but he's serious," answered Tali.

Admiral Shala did some quick research with her Omni-tool. She shook her head. "There was one, but he has since died, over a year ago. He was an older yentleman.

"Then it's okay," said John.

"What is this all about?"

"Well . . ." continued John. "Let us just say that I heard about it from someone close to him and I had a bit of good news to give him on the topic."

"Losing a child and your wife first is hardly good news," observed Shala. "Tali did you tell him about this?"

"Auntie? I only know about it because Yahn told me as well."

Shala looked at John, but because he was looking at a visor, he had no way of knowing what she was thinking.

In the meantime, Miranda was looking at her Omni-tool and experiencing a notable paling of the face.

"Commander?" she said. "I think we're going to have to leave very quickly."

"How so? The Normandy is on it's way to the Citadel," answered Shepherd. "They are not due back for two weeks."

"No, she's already on her way back," answered Miranda.

"What happened?" asked just about every member of the team in their own particular way.

"The entire crew has been taken by the Collectors. Only Joker and EDI escaped," answered Miranda. "EDI was most apologetic, she said that in spite of checking that IFF thousands of times, there was a hidden signal in the IFF which alerted the Collectors who apparently have been homing in on the Normandy over the past few days. Once it happened, EDI was able to scrub the virus, but the damage is done, the crew is gone.

Everyone took a second or two in order to engage in what is known as stunned silence. Then Commander Shepherd spoke firmly and decisively.

"But not the team," he said. "And that means we go through the relay asap and rescue them."

"Not how we were planning it," objected Miranda. "As your XO I might remind you that we had planned on a full restocking. We only have four weeks of supplies on the Normandy now, we don't know how long it will take for us to find them."

"And we don't know how long they will have before they are killed like all the others," retorted John. "We found no living colonists on the Collector ship when we went through it. I don't plan on wasting any time."

"What will be the point if we die too?" asked Miranda.

"We always knew this was a risk," answered Shepherd. "But if we have any chance of saving that crew, time is of the essence."

The next seven hours in the lounge were somewhat grating. While sleeping quarters had been offered the crew, no one was in the mood to use them given the sudden recognition that what they had been training for, planning, and operating in light of, was about to fully unfold. Tali excused herself from the team and spent several of those hours with Admiral Shala and Kal'Reeger. John had no doubt she was saying goodbye.

When the Normandy finally arrived, the crew got on board and Shepherd set course for the Omega 5 Relay. ETA was going to be six days.

Once on the Normandy, John went from team member to team member wrapping things up and if possible, helping to establish any closures which could be done. Jack was the most pensive and nervous, pacing like a caged animal. She paused and asked if there were any bargains one could make with the powers 'on the other side'.

"Only one," replied Shepherd. "Go through your whole life now, pick out everything you did that you know was wrong. And be sorry about it, especially those things you got away with."

"Then get out," she muttered. "I've got a lot to do."

Garrus was in his usual spot by the guns. They chatted for a while, Garrus spoke about his life in the Turian military, and how they prepared for high risk missions. There were a few stories told, and as expected Garrus remembered a young turian woman whom he had worked with and blown off steam with during his military career. He concluded with informing Shepherd that while he had reach, she had flexibility.

"I couldn't do this without you," concluded Shepherd shaking his head and smiling over the stories.

"Yes you could," replied Garrus. "Just not as stylishly."

Mordin was in the lab, puttering.

"Think I have inoculation against indoctrination," he observed. "Nanobots infesting brain creating chemical reactions which make Reaper suggestions seem very good and intelligent. Don't have victims to test on . . . may never find out it works." He paused. "Now I will send a vid letter to favorite nephew. Say goodbye. Help me to personalize what I am about to fight for."

His last visit was with Joker. He found Joker chatting with EDI.

"Commander . . ." he began. "Sorry about the crew. . . . No . . . I'm not sorry about it. What the hell were you doing? Leaving us out here to face the Collectors alone? We should stop before we get to the Relay and I should just . . . Go!"

"You don't mean that Jeff," suggested EDI.

"I . . Uh . . . No . . . but it felt good," he concluded. "Okay I'm good Commander. I'm ready to save the day."

"I know how dangerous it was, and still is . . ." suggested Shepherd. "If you need more time just let me know."

"Oh Geeze, no need to . . . I know I got lucky. You don't have to get all touchy feely.

"Shepherd is right to be concerned," suggested EDI. "You may have suffered a number of stress fractures."

"That's what pills are for EDI," grumbled Jeff. "You are so my mom!"

"I noticed you are calling EDI she and her now," suggested the Commander.

"Oh, no I hadn't noticed that. EDI should I have noticed that?"

"No Jeff, it is not worth noting," replied EDI.

"Well there you go Shepherd, looks like we haven't noticed anything."

Shepherd shook his head and walked back to the elevator to his cabin.

"Maybe we need that pool after all," he mused.

Then he got serious as the elevator rose up.

"Make a girl happy to the end of her life? Check! Do something heroic which will enable the Reapers to be beaten? Check!" he thought. "This could be the end of it for Tali or Tali and me."

He walked into his cabin. Tali was there in front of the mirror, brushing her hair, wearing her new poncho and body suit with the jewelry. She turned to face him.

"Do I look okay?" she asked. Once again John noticed she was chewing on her lower lip with her small front teeth. And it also dawned upon him that this was the very first time she had the opportunity to wear it. It was like the suit and yet not like the suit. He could see the black wool outlining her body underneath the poncho, like the suit, but it was a more solid color and not interrupted by all those modifications and tubes. And draping over it was the poncho. It was a more soft and feminine appearance. Her facial expression was that typical Tali uncertainty which remained such a suggestion of vulnerability. Her hair was now framing her face in a very full fashion and beginning to brush against her shoulders. It had a slight curl to it, thanks to her brushing. In the illumination of the aquarium lights, there was a blue tinge to it.

"More than okay," answered John. "Entirely acceptable wear for the Captain's Quarters in the Evening."

She walked over to him and embraced him. And began to cry.

"It's yust not fair!" she sniffled.

"What?"

"We'll be going through the Relay fours days before we can bond! I could die without ever being able to make love to you."

John led her over to the couch where he sat down, and winced as she sat down upon his lap. He never could figure out how to get that girl on to his lap without those hips putting serious pressure on them.

"Tali?" he asked. "Are you happy now?"

Tali leaned against his shoulder and struggled to wipe the tears from her cheeks.

"I'm very happy," she admitted. "I've gotten you back. I've gotten to spend time acclimating myself to you, and I know that when we can, we will be fully bonded. If I were to die on this mission. I would die happy."

She sighed.

"But I don't want to die happy, I want to bond with you first."

"And I don't want you to die on me!" she bawled. "I lost you once already I don't want to lose you again."

"Not Yahn . . . Not Yahn . . . Not Yahn," she whimpered, her head resting upon his shoulder looking behind him.

John nodded his head.

"It's what you said the first time I died wasn't it?" he asked.

She nodded her head.

"I was in the Engineering quarters of the Neema when I got the message from Liara," she said. "It was all I could do . . . and cry."

"I'm not going to die and leave you behind," he whispered.

"I want to believe that," she replied.

"You can believe it," he answered. "It's one of the conditions I'm bound to. I'm to make you a happy girl for the rest of your life. If that life ends during the next mission, you die happy. If I die, it will be with you. And I promise you if that happens, I will be waiting at the gate for you. But if you get there first, you have to wait at the gate for me. Okay?"

"Will we be as happy there as here?"

"Even happier. It was really hard to come back. It was that nagging what might have been which was threatening me that really motivated me to return."

"But what about me?" she asked. There was a little mischievous in her tone.

"Well, I suppose I could call it a bribe by God, but He didn't exactly specify that it would be you, I kind of guessed and then doubted and then concluded and then questioned."

"I suppose you're going to say that I clouded your mind even in heaven?"

"That's my story and I'm sticking to it," he said.

She looked at him and smiled a little. Then she turned the lights off. She had learned the vocal commands which controlled the lights on the cabin and had proven more than willing to use them.

John looked at her face. The only light was coming in through the port from the stars in the void. Yet her eyes remained a faint white with brief flashing glimmers. She kissed him for a moment, and then kissed him again more passionately.

"Take off my clothes and make love to me Yahn," she whispered. "It's only a few more days and I can't possibly get that sick at this point."

"Tali, we made a promise to ourselves and the crew," he replied, gently placing a finger on her lips.

She sighed and kissed him again.

"I hate waiting," she grumbled.

"You won't regret it once it has happened," he said. "Now be a good little Quarian girl and turn the lights back on."

"Make me."

Which was the cue for the tickling to begin. Incidentally the lights never did get back on until next morning.

The six days to the Omega 4 Relay passed swiftly. The mood was somber and often sour. There was no cook, so food was haphazard based on who could take the time to prepare. Tali, wanted John to have a nice meal during the time. So she got EDI to help her try a levo dish, which she burned to almost ash the first time, and then only crusted the edges the second time. EDI was almost no help. She could reference any recipe which the galley could prepare based on what was available, but Tali had to mix and prepare the ingredients and EDI could only adjust the stove and oven. Tali did taste test the dishes, but found them all too bitter or sour. She tried to adjust, but realized that everything about John tasted tangy, even his kisses. She concluded that this was how humans liked their food. John was the perfect gentleman, he ate it, suggested it did not need as much onion and then retired to the medical bay for bicarbonate of soda while Tali cleaned up. The emptiness of the ship wore on everyone save Jack who always kept to herself. Kasumi spent her spare time in Engineering with Tali or in the Armory with Jacob. Garrus checked and double checked the weaponry. EDI struck up a conversation with numerous geth programs. By the time that they were approaching the relay, the Geth were busy poking about the entirety of the Normandy systems and suggesting improvements and EDI had developed a close friendship with one of the Geth programs who she named Bytes and requested that he stay with them as her 'pet'. As Tali had explained prior, individual Geth programs possessed only animal intelligence and so John figured one wouldn't hurt. Permission was granted. Joker was initially jealous, though he vociferously denied it, but once he discovered that Bytes liked coming along for extra-net gaming, and was remarkably bad at it, Joker lightened up.

In the cabin however, Tali kept struggling with the very deep desire to be fully bonded with John prior to the mission. While on one hand she respected and wanted John to remain fully in control, the other part of her was hoping that she could tease him to such an extent that he would completely lose control. She fantasized laying upon the bed entirely naked for him, but of course when she heard him come up to the door, she would dive under the blankets. The most she could work herself up to was the sheet wrapped around her torso so that her arms and shoulders were out. Then she tried out the shower one night, thinking she could arrange some need for him to come in and 'help' her, but of course she was too good an engineer to be able to stage an accident with it. She figured it out so quickly she knew any 'Yahn? I can't get this water shower thing to work right' simply would not be at all convincing. He would probably say something along the lines of "Turn the Cold down" and of course she knew exactly what he would mean by that.

But it was a nice feeling, that temperate water splashing on her skin and the especially clean feeling when soap was applied. So she tried to forget the towels. And failed. John saw them on the bed and gently opened the door while she was in the shower and put them on the hook next to it and closed the door, not so much as even trying to sneak a peak. She figured she would have panicked at the last second anyway.

When it came down to it, the only time she was seen fully naked by John was in her fantasies. Reality kept her trying to cover herself up. So on the last night, she settled for being under the sheets with the resolution to remain without the nightgown for the entire night. She snuggled up to him kissed him passionately several times, commenced heelrou, and then they both fell asleep, exhausted from all the tension. When she woke up the next morning, she found that he had gently covered her with the blanket. She rolled over and looked at him as he was putting his armor on.

"Good morning Kitten," he said.

"I don't remember the blanket," she offered.

"You were not covered by it no, but you had the sheet wrapped around you so tightly before I got up that I ended up sleeping without anything covering me. Had my sweats on so it didn't matter. I put it over you because you were starting to tremble a little in the night. I found that's what you do when you're feeling cold."

She sighed. Even in sleep she couldn't pull it off.

Then he gave her a little flirty sexy look.

"Shall I help you into your suit?"

That was an invitation if there was one and of course, true to her personality, she hunched up in the blankets while her eyes went a shade of pink. He smiled and shook his head. He got up and then got on his knees so his face might be level with hers on the bed.

"Where did I miss shaving?" he asked.

"Why are you asking me this now?" she asked back with a bit of a surprised smile on her face.

"We're about to fight the Collectors, and I want to look my best today," he answered.

She looked him over, sat up a little, holding the sheet close to her and began to look his face over.

"You have a very pretty neck and shoulders," he observed. "Your neck is longer than a human girl's. But it's really pretty on you."

She giggled and the pointed out the three spots on his neck that he had missed. He promptly retired to the head and closed the door behind him and turned on his razor. She promptly leapt from the bed and proceeded to get her suit on as quickly as she could and then realized that she had missed yet another opportunity. He then came back out, and helped her with gloves, boots, and helmet, as so often in the past, but before her helmet went on, there were five minutes of gentle kisses. If they didn't come back, this would be the last time. There was one last pause where John looked at Tali's face, and then with a sigh he put her mask on.

They reached the Pilot's chair. Before them the Relay glowed a deep orange. Every member of the team was behind Shepherd and Tali. The Normandy approached, EDI acknowledged the Reaper IFF linking up. The Drive Core lit up and suddenly they were there, amid a thousand thousand debris of ship's who had tried and failed prior. Joker had intelligently yanked the Normandy up and so they had cleared the field which swirled around the distant Black Hole like a ring. The sky was a deep orange, the consequence of being deep in the core of the galaxy. It was the perfect hiding place for the Collectors. It was also a surreal atmosphere to be sailing through.

"Crew," said Shepherd. "This is our first signal that we're going to win this. The Collectors have been hidden for a very long time. I suspect they are not that numerous. All food would need to be imported here, as well as air and water."

Behind him, several team members nodded. Good news like this bolstered confidence.

John understood the tactical situation. So far they had a clear line of retreat.

"Some of these ships are ancient!" gasped Joker.

"I have detected an energy signature at the edge of the accretion disk," observed EDI.

"That's got to be the Collector Base," observed Shepherd. "Take us in for a closer look, nice and easy."

The Normandy sailed closer to the tubular structure which was almost end up in the distance. And then alerts started to ring, small android attack units were closing in.

"We have company, Jeff," suggested EDI with just the slightest hint of concern in her voice. "Be careful."

And the first dog fight of the battle began. Tali was starting to squeeze John's hand.

"They're starting to piss me off," snapped Joker. It was a good sign, especially as there were the rumbles of energy beams striking the hull. "Ready for round two?"

"As long as new armor holds," muttered Miranda. As had proven so often the case, she was dressed in a form fitting outfit, black leather, gold trim, and very well cut black calf boots and gloves. Tali suspected she had dressed more to present a good looking corpse than fight. But at this point, it was a little late to suggest a wardrobe change. At least John was focused in front behind Joker, when he wasn't squeezing her hand back. It seemed he was almost as nervous about this as she was.

"Be his rock, be his rock be his rock," she thought to herself over and over again.

"Alert, hull breach on engineering deck," said EDI.

"Zaeed?"

"Got it," Zaeed replied. "Grunt! Mordin! Sam Baby! Let's go!"

The four of them dashed to the elevator and shot down to the decks below.

"Sam Baby?" queried Shepherd.

"Guess she got tired of throwing him up onto the ceiling," speculated Miranda.

"Sitting ducks out here!" snapped Joker. "I'm going to lose them in the debris field."

And he dived the Normandy into the pile of ship's wrecks beneath them and for the next five minutes, he put the ship through the paces in one of the most deadly of obstacle courses known. It helped that EDI wasn't screaming "ENGINE BLOCK" or "TURN RIGHT!" like the typical female passenger trope would have had it. She merely fine tuned some of Joker's twists and turns without so much fuss. That and she was on his left as opposed to his right.

Tali wasn't screaming either. But John's arm was suffering a great deal of stress from two very strong pairs of fingers squeezing very tight at specific moments. As for John, he was standing very much at attention, making calm observations, while his armored gloves formed very deep indentations into the hand rail behind Joker's chair.

"Our kinetic barriers are not designed to survive impact with debris that size, Jeff," suggested EDI.

"Guess it's a good thing we upgraded them then," answered Joker.

There were several close scrapes and then EDI suggested that the barriers were down to 40% where upon Joker told her to reroute non-critical power. Three minutes later they pulled back out of the debris field with barriers still at 30%.

"We have another of those guddam balls in the cargo hold," grumbled Zaeed's radio over Grunt's enthusiastic shouts. "Took out the first one already so's this just to let you know."

The Normandy was once again in open space and the Collector Base was before them.

"See if you can find a place to land where we won't draw attention," ordered Shepherd.

"You think they don't already know we are here?" asked Jacob. "That little welcome committee wasn't exactly quiet."

"You got that," answered Joker. "Looks like we have an old friend coming out to greet us."

And pulling out of the collector base was the ship which had been their persistent foe since the first Normandy. Shepherd leaned forward.

"This time, we leave you spaced," he whispered. Then he winced because Tali was really squeezing his arm.

"Time to show them our new teeth," ordered Shepherd. "Fire the main guns."

The Collectors got off the first shot, but they did not have the element of surprise and EDI with Joker made the Normandy a much harder to hit target. Then the Normandy fired and the shot hit home and hurt.

"How do you like that you sons of bitches!" shouted Joker.

"Get in close!" ordered Shepherd. "And finish them off!"

"Everyone hold on it's going to be a wild ride!" exclaimed Joker.

The Normandy dove in and fired a shot straight at the center of the Collector vessel. The shot penetrated and broke her back. The multiple explosions buffeted the Normandy and knocked the Mass Effect Generators down. With Joker madly making adjustments the Normandy belly landed onto the base itself while everyone in the cabin took a tumble save Joker who was protected from too serious an impact by Miranda's sudden and almost inspirational employment of her biotic field.

"Multiple core systems overloaded during the crash," diagnosed EDI. "Restoring operation will take time."

Miranda sighed. "We all knew this was likely a one way trip."

"Our primary objective was to find the base and stop the Collectors," said Shepherd. "At any cost."

"Well we're off to a good start," observed Joker.

"We can get the systems back working again?" asked Jack.

"Something is odd about this picture," thought Shepherd.

"In time, Jack," answered EDI.

"So we can like, still maybe fly out of here if . . ."

"If the Collectors are dealt with in a way which gives me the time needed to make repairs," replied EDI. "I hope that is sufficient for you."

"So long as I can still hope," answered Jack.

"Three sentences with out a swear word Jack," observed Joker. "You feeling okay?"

"Shut the fuck up Joker!" she replied.

"Ah back to the old Jack," answered Joker. "I feel better. You had me so worried there."

"How long before the Collectors find us here?" asked Shepherd.

"I do not detect an internal security network," commented EDI. "It is possible that the Collectors did not suspect anyone would reach the base."

"Or we were lucky and our belly flop screwed up their sensors as well so they don't know we are alive," added Joker.

The team gathered at the shuttle bay, weapons out and ready. Everyone was at full alert, focused, and possessing grim expressions. Commander Shepherd faced them and began to speak.

"This isn't how we planned this mission," he said. "But this is where we're at. We can't worry about whether or not the Normandy can get us home. We came to stop the Collectors and that means coming up with a plan to take out this station. EDI? Bring up your scans."

A holographic three dimensional blue print of the Collector Base sprung into view.

"You should be able to over load their critical systems if you get to their main control center . . . here." EDI said while outlining the objective point.

"That means going through the heart of the station," observed Jacob. "Right past this massive energy signature."

"That's the central chamber," concluded Shepherd. "If our crew or any of the colonists are still alive, they are likely being kept there."

"Looks like there are two routes," continued Jacob. "It might be a good idea to split into two groups to keep the Collectors off balance and regroup in the main chamber."

"No," replied Shepherd. "Never divide the team when you don't know the numbers or disposition of the enemy. We know how they fight. A single rolling thunder will get us there."

"If they concentrate their forces," argued Jacob.

"We're dead. This way we all die together as opposed to two groups with one being taken out first and then the other. They don't have biotics. We will be able to be protected against flank attacks initially with Miranda, Jack, and Samara. And Kasumi can be cloaked twenty yards behind to warn of any impending efforts at surrounding. As Sun Tzu would tell you, we're on death ground now, we either fight, and win, or we die. It's just that simple."

There was a brief silence.

"Let's do it," suggested Miranda.

"Just to let you all know, it's been an honor piloting for you Commander," came Joker's voice over the intercom. "And the rest of you, it's been great getting to know you."

"Be careful," suggested EDI. "I'll have as much as I can ready for you when you return."

"This will be one hell of a story to tell the boys back on the Citadel," mused Garrus. "And one that will be hard to believe. So let's make it as unbelievable as possible. I like the idea of being able to swear the whole thing is true while being unable to come up with a way to exaggerate any further."

"Don't forget Yahn," came Tali. "I love you."

"I love you to Tali," replied John.

'Guddam Love Birds," grumbled Zaeed.

"Hey, we have to come back alive," argued Jacob grinning. "You don't screw up a love story like that by dying right?"

"New grenades designed to mess with Collector's sensory collection. Eager to try them out," observed Mordin. "Live tests always enlightening."

"Okay, we don't know how many lives the Collectors have taken," concluded John. "But they are not going to take one more. Let's show them what they have taken on!"

And so the team left the Normandy, and headed for the collector docking bay in front of them. Grunt was on point, to his left was Jacob and Zaeed on the far left. Legion and John were on the right. Thane was left flank sniper and Garrus was right flank sniper. Kasumi was starting in front as scout, cloaked. Behind them were Jack in the center, with Miranda on the left and Samara on the right. Tali was behind Grunt on the right while Mordin was behind Grunt on the left. They were packed down with ammo bars and possessed backpacks filled with heat sinks. John's orders were to engage in Rolling Thunder each time they encountered the Collectors until further notice. He was counting on the team inflicting so much punishment that the Collectors would keep falling back to recover and given them that much more time to close in and do the mission.

As Garrus would describe it later. "They didn't see us coming, they heard us."


	19. Chapter 19 - Rolling Thunder Honeymoon

The Collectors came on forward, and right into the Rolling Thunder. The team's bullets ripped through their shields, shredded arms and legs, and sent the Collectors back reeling again and again. And then Harbinger arrived.

"I'll get you my pretty, you and your little dog Toto too."

"They still haven't figured that out!" screamed Jack. "We're going to so DO THIS!"

The team steadily advanced, the dark hive like tunnel they pushed through was strewn behind them with a mess of dead Collectors, spent heat clips, and shredded walls. But Harbinger simply sent more into the fray, counting on firepower and inertia to do their work for them. But what he had not counted on, nor did he care, was the fact that the Collectors themselves did not like the idea of dying. And while Harbinger did not worry about the death cries of his troops, his troops did. Again and again the Collectors fell back and again and again Harbinger had to possess a Collector to lead them forward.

And each time that silly line from the Wizard of Oz announced the arrival of the next attacking wave. And the team began to smile again. Confidence in fact, started to make them cocky and Shepherd had to order a cover fire position to keep them from charging forwards. There was a moment that the team was almost swimming in Medi-gel and then they sobered up. Everyone was seeing everyone else's armor chipped badly in places. But they were still all alive.

"The Collectors may be stupidly lead," he reminded them. "But their bullets are not so stupid they don't know how to break down your shields and pierce your armor."

Slamming through a set of doors which they shut behind them, the team found that they had reached the central chamber. It was a vast wide expanse. Overhead were a myriad of tubes which suggested blood vessels all gathering at a central point and proceeding further in. Around them were the pods which they had seen on Freedom's Progress, Horizon, and the Collector ship.

"Commander," said Miranda in a quite voice looking at one set of pods in particular. "You need to see this."

They had found the missing team members and colonists, and before their eyes, one of the colonists woke up, screamed and began pounding upon the glass, and then literally melted in front of them.

"Get them out of there!" shouted John.

Doors were pulled off the pods, people were pulled out. Those who were unconscious came to with eyes wide open in amazement. Those who were conscious when pulled out were weeping at their narrow escape.

"Shepherd," said Dr. Chakwas in wide eyed amazement. "You came for us."

"I don't even what to think about what was about to happen," whimpered Kelly. "A few more moments and . . ."

"No one get's left behind," replied Shepherd.

"The colonists," continued Dr. Chakwas. "The little robots processed them into a grey matter which was pumped through those tubes overhead."

"Why are they doing this? What are they doing with . . . us?" asked Shepherd.

"I don't know," answered Karin. "I'm just glad you got here before it happened to us."

"So are we," replied Miranda. "But we still have a job to do. We've done well so far, but let's hope we finish it.

"Joker?" called Shepherd over the com. "Can you get a fix on our position?"

"Rodger that Commander, all those tubes lead into the main control room right above you. The route is blocked by a security door? But there's another chamber that runs parallel to the one you are in."

"I can not recommend that," broke in EDI. "Thermal emissions suggest that the chamber is overrun with seeker swarms. Mordin's counter measure can not protect you against so many at once."

"What about Biotics?" asked Shepherd looking at the team. "Could we create a biotic field to keep them from getting near us?"

"Yes," answered Samara. "I think it may be possible. I wouldn't be able to protect everyone . . ."

"But we don't need you to protect everyone, we have Miranda and Jack," replied John.

"Yes, I could do it too," replied Miranda. "In theory, any biotic could handle it."

"Then let's go that way," determined Shepherd. "They won't expect us to take that corridor, that will give us time, and Miranda will cover left flank, Samara will cover right flank, and five minutes in Jack will switch off with Miranda, then five minutes later, Miranda will switch off with Samara. Then five minutes later, Samara switches off with Jack. Lather, Rinse, Repeat. Got it?"

Everyone nodded.

"And crew? No biotics covering your fronts from bullets. We advance under cover got it?"

Everyone nodded again.

"Commander?" called Joker. "We have enough systems online to do a pickup, but we need to land behind your position."

"We are in no shape to fight," suggested Karin.

"We can't afford to go back Shepherd," argued Miranda. "Not now."

"The crew will never make it without help. I'll send someone with you."

John looked at the team and his gaze fell upon Tali. She looked back at him and shook her head. For a second John's heart nearly screamed in pain. This was his chance to protect her from the possibility of death. But even though he could not see her face, her body language clearly stated that she would not leave him. And to enforce that feeling, she walked up to him, put her hand on his shoulder and said, "Mordin is almost out of grenades. He can lead them back."

"Grenades very successful, regret not making any more, but test runs always fraught with risk, either too many not working or work too well and not enough." He then confirmed the matter of signals and landing sight coordinates with Joker.

The team watched the crew depart, not without a little 'lucky dog' emotion, and then turned for the seeker swarm tunnel.

Shepherd's analysis was correct. The Collectors had not expected the team to take that corridor, in fact, the Collectors might even have suspected that the team would withdraw now that they had recovered the crew and accordingly Harbinger had to take valuable time comprehending the new maneuver and responding.

His response was husks.

"Rolling Thunder with shotguns and machine pistols!" cried Shepherd. And the husks charged right into the maelstrom and exploded messily in a most gratifying manner. What helped in particular was that the biotic field had to be strong enough to keep out the seekers and so likewise acted as a buffer for the husks, slowing them down as well. Thus they tended to form a solid wall in front of the team before pushing through, not only giving the team plenty of point blank shooting practice, but likewise providing an inadvertent shield to any collectors who were trying to shoot at the team from behind the husks.

The Roman Legion always fought in blocks, with the man behind resting his hand on the back of the man in front of him. When the Centurion blew the whistle, the men in front fell back to the rear and the second line began to fight. Thus the legion was always presenting a fresh line of men in front of the attackers. The switching off between Miranda, Jack, and Samara kept each one recovering after ten minutes of exertion. Thus even though the corridor was a long passage and there were numerous pauses as the team had to fight through, they reached the end. And in better condition than they had down the first corridor. The collectors had a hard a time fighting in the clouds of seeker swarms since the swarms interfered with communications. The team, all in range of Shepherd's voice, did not need communication links, and even if they did, the biotics kept the swarms from them and thus there was almost no static.

Only at the end did Harbinger show some tactical finesse. He sent the last force in behind Shepherd's forces. But Kasumi, who was now providing cover for the biotics in the rear, spotted them and alerted the team who commenced to turn around, and fire while waking backwards. Kasumi, swung and began to forward scout. The door slammed shut in front of them, sealing off the seeker swarms. Once again the team had made it through.

"We're going to make it we're going to make it we're going to make it," chanted Jack to herself over and over again.

"Who's the cheerleader now?" whispered Miranda to John.

He smiled back.

"Joker? Status?"

"At the extraction point," replied Joker. "Crew has shown up with Mordin."

"No casualties," added EDI.

"Excellent," said Miranda. "Now let's make it count! EDI? What's our next step?"

"There should be some nearby platforms that will take you to the main control console," replied EDI. "From there you can overload the system and destroy the base."

"Commander?" intruded Joker. "You have hostiles on the other side of the door and it won't be long before they bust through."

"Then I guess we need to hurry," replied Shepherd. "If the entire team is on one of those platforms, we fly away and it won't matter how many of them are behind that door, and there are only so many platforms I'm thinking."

Shepherd scanned the team.

"I'm ready Commander," said Garrus.

"So am I," added Tali.

Shepherd turned to face the team.

"The Collectors, the Reapers, they are not a threat to us. They are a threat to everything . . . everyone. Those are the lives we are fighting for. That's the scale. It's been a long journey, and no one is coming out without scars. But it all comes down to this moment. We win or lose it all in the next few moments. Make me proud. Make yourselves proud."

"LET'S GO!" screamed Grunt.

And true to form, Harbinger sent in the platforms one at a time, and each one was riddled by the team.

"Yahn, it's like you said back on the old Normandy," came Tali's voice over the pri-com channel during a lull between firefights as they proceeded across the vast central chamber towards the main console platform by platform. "Harbinyer can't be a Collector. Harbinyer is a Reaper. He does not learn from his mistakes. He just keeps doing the same thing over and over again."

"You remember that talk?" asked John slightly surprised.

"How could I forget?" she came back gently. "It was the talk when you said I was lovable. It gave me the couragh to tell you that I loved you yust a few hours later."

"And I didn't even know why I was saying it at the time," he thought to himself. "How the interplay of events have lead to this moment."

He looked over at Tali for a second. She was focused ahead so she did not see him.

"If I could only see that pretty face one last time," he whispered. "Don't take her from me, not yet, please not yet."

One by one the platforms came up, and one by one each one was taken out in a deadly game of hopscotch across them. Harbinger kept whispering threats, he kept observing how fragile their forms were, he kept insisting this was going to be personal, and how he was going to get their little dog Toto too. He never caught on. And it rained spent heat sinks from the battle.

The last platform carried them off.

"This is it," he said. "All the tubes lead to this spot. EDI? What can you tell us? What are they doing?"

"The tubes are feeding into some kind of superstructure," observed EDI. "It is emitting organic and non-organic energy signatures. Given these readings, it must be massive."

And then EDI lowered her voice as if to suggest she was in awe.

"Shepherd, if my calculations are correct, the superstructure is a Reaper."

"St Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle, be our protection now and forever more," whispered John.

"Not just any Reaper, EDI," he said out loud as it came into view. "A Human Reaper."

"Precisely," whispered EDI. "It appears as if the Collectors have processed tens of thousands of humans. Significantly more will be required to complete the Reaper."

"How many more?" asked Shepherd.

"Millions," suggested EDI. "Perhaps more. Impossible to know for certain. This Reaper appears to be in a very early stage of development. An embryo in human terms."

"So we can still stop it?" asked Shepherd.

"The process can be stopped, but it is not clear how much it has developed," answered EDI. "I can not tell you if it has awareness."

"They are building it to look like a human. Why?"

"It appears that a Reaper's shape is based in part on the species used to create it," speculated EDI.

"Reapers are machines. Why do they need humans at all?"

"Incorrect. Reapers are sapient constructs. A hybrid of organic and inorganic material. Exact construction methods are unclear but it seems probable that the Reapers absorb the essence of the species utilizing it in their reproduction process."

"What do the Collectors gain?"

"They may be facilitating the Reaper equivalent of reproduction, or it may serve another purpose. I do not have the data to speculate further. However, it is clear that the Collectors are merely pawns. The technology and ability needed to create this Reaper is not their own. It is likely that different species construct each Reaper. In this case, it looks as if the Collectors provide the labor."

"So how do we destroy it?"

EDI pointed out that the tubes which were feeding the Reaper were the weak point in the structure but it was at this point that the Collectors returned for another set of fire fights.

"Bugs! Swift! (John's code talk name for Thane) snipe the tubes!" ordered Shepherd and while the team defended themselves against the advancing Collectors, Garrus and Thane proceeded to shoot out the tubes holding the Reaper up. The massive construct proceeded to collapse into the depths of the vast chamber. Shepherd took a quick count and check. They were not quite running out of ammo, heat sinks, or medi-gel just yet, but a few more fights and they would have to start to worry.

"Joker!" ordered Shepherd. "Reve up the engines. I'm about to blow this place sky high."

He was now getting ready to overload the entire control system while Tali and Legion began the hacking necessary to override the firewalls and safety features.

"Rodger," replied Joker. "But I've got a message coming in from Tim. I'm patching it through."

Miranda pulled up her Omni-tool and the three dimensional features of The Illusive Man sprang into view.

"Shepherd," he said. "You have done the impossible."

"I was part of a team. We all have pulled through together," was Shepherd's reply.

"I'm looking at the schematics EDI has provided. A timed radiation pulse would kill the remaining Collectors but leave the machinery and technology intact. This is our chance Shepherd. They were building a Reaper, that knowledge could save us."

"They liquified people, turned them into something horrible. We have to destroy the base."

"Don't be short sighted," countered The Illusive Man. "Our best chance against the Reapers is to turn their own resources against them."

"No," replied Shepherd. "You don't win wars by fighting on the enemies terms, you win wars by forcing the enemy to fight on your terms."

"This base is a gift!" argued The Illusive Man. "We can't just destroy it! The Reapers were working directly with the Collectors who knows what information is buried in here?"

"You are completely ruthless. Next thing I know you'll be wanting to grow your own Reaper," accused Shepherd.

"My goal is to save humanity from the Reapers," stated The Illusive Man. "At any cost. I've never hidden that from you. Imagine how many lives will be saved if we keep this base intact and use this knowledge to thwart the Reapers. Imagine the lives that will be lost if we don't."

"No matter what technology we find," argued Shepherd. "It's not worth it."

"Shepherd," persisted The Illusive Man. "You died fighting for what you believed. I brought you back so you could continue to do that. Some would say we went to far by doing that but look at what we've accomplished. I didn't discard you because I knew your value. Don't discard this base so quickly, think of the potential!"

"I won't make fear compromise who I am!" replied John. He turned to finish the preparations for the overloading of the central unit.

The Illusive Man continued to argue and Miranda cut him off and smiled.

"I love you Yahn," whispered Tali over her pri-com.

"We have ten minutes before she blows!" shouted Shepherd.

And then the Reaper climbed back up to attack them.

It was a very tense twenty seconds, but it was clear that the weak point on the creature was the central mouth point where the weapon was located. A good solid sniper shot by Garrus blew the thing's face up and it fell, grabbing a platform as it plummeted. A platform which Tali was standing on. She lost her balance and slid towards the edge and John leapt for her sliding on his stomach towards her.

"Please not yet God please not yet God please not yet God," he screamed as he grabbed her hand. She latched on, then a jolt in the flooring broke their grip.

"NOT FUNNY GOD!" he screamed and saw with horror that she was going over the edge. He reached her hand just as her head disappeared and almost blindly grabbed it. He pulled her up, he was shaking.

"RUN!" he shouted. And they dashed towards the Normandy.

There was another sudden explosion and the entire chamber shook and before they knew it, he and Tali were pinned under a large beam.

The story is told of one of the great Spanish reformers, a woman by the name of St. Therese of Avila who lived during the Renaissance and worked hard to improve the daily lives of the ordinary people of Spain. Like all great reformers there were thousands of opponents who made her life more than troublesome. But she found consolation in God, which was why she became a Saint. But there were moments, such as the time when she was on her way to yet another hospital in need of reform and it was in the middle of a sleeting rain in the dead of winter. The cart jolted over a boulder and the physics were such that she literally flew out of the back of the cart and landed seat first in a six inch puddle of icy water and mud. Her woolen habit was now completely soaked in ice, water, and mud. She was hours away from the nearest inn. The flight pattern was so perfectly aligned that she immediately suspected divine intervention and looked skyward.

"Why?" she cried to the heavens. "Do you do these things to me?"

And God replied. "I do this to all my friends."

"Is it any wonder?" she screamed back. "That you have so FEW?"

It took a moment for John to come to and as he was doing so, his thinking was along the same lines as St. Therese. And he realized he was under the beam with Tali, which only confirmed his earlier comparisons. There was no one around them either which only synched it. Zaeed knew his orders, he had kept the team moving towards the Normandy. John struggled to get the beam up. The stabbing pain in his chest suggested broken ribs. He pulled Tali up.

"Run Tali! Run!" he shouted.

Tali ran, but she quickly realized that John was not keeping up with her. She turned.

"RUN DUCK!" he screamed "RUN!"

He had given her an order, she wept as she ran. She was convinced that he wouldn't make it, but he had given her an order and she was bound to obey. All those times she had demanded that he grant her no slack for the sake of success. All those lives of her team mates and the crew of the Normandy were now alive because all had obeyed Shepherd's orders. She ran. She cried. But there was the Normandy before her. She ran and leapt on board. Joker came up and was shooting beside her. Garrus was behind her his hand on her shoulder. And she was looking for John.

And he came running, staggering, and then another explosion and another platform fell away. Behind him Collectors were showing up and shooting.

"YAHN!" she screamed reaching out to him, though ten yards were between her and him.

And he leapt. He ran as he leapt, and she saw he was not going to make it. She lunged forward and grabbed his hands just as they reached the edge of the docking bay deck. Her strong fingers latched around his wrists, and Garrus was pulling her by the shoulders back. There were bullets wearing down his shields, striking the sides of the vessel, wearing down her shields. She did not let go, she pulled. Garrus pulled her. And then John was up and on the deck. The hatch slid closed as EDI began to count down the seconds.

"Ten, Nine, Eight," she began.

"I get it I get it," shouted Joker who slid into the pilot's chair and began the acceleration process.

The Normandy began to shoot away from the Base. Faster and faster and then there was the explosion. Joker had intelligently aimed the Normandy up beyond the accretion disk and flying debris from all the wreaks were blowing in other directions. But the shock wave was three dimensional and spherical. The Normandy was too badly banged up to out run that. And she was hit backside and shoved forward while systems sparked and sirens went off and sprinklers unleashed and the whole ship seemed to tumble for a brief period. And then the crew and team looked at each other. The entire ship was in shadows. The backup lights were on and every thing was so dark in contrast that it seemed they were all looking at silhouettes.

"We are SO EFFEN ALIVE!" screamed Jack. "WE ARE SO EFFEN ALIVE! YES YES YES YES!"

She paused to take a breath.

"Effen?" pantomimed Joker's mouth to Shepherd.

"I guess so," replied Shepherd, grinning. Then he winced.

"Yahn," began Tali's shaking voice. "You are being taken to the med bay now. Leyion? Can you start the damagh report? Ask EDI for help."

"Already started," said Miranda, giving a 'get off my turf' look to Tali.

Tali ignored her. Her Yahn needed help and she was going to see to it that he got it. He was alive. And that was the most important thing for her at that moment.

The lights were dim, the elevator took forever to go down to the next level. But Dr. Chakwas was waiting there, already suppressing her own fears and trauma so she might be available for those who were going to be needing her more. Kelly was with her, likewise taking a few sedatives so she might be able to perform any psychological functions.

"Tali," began John who was suddenly realizing that the ship was a mess and he needed to be up and commanding.

"No you don't," she said. "You are hurt and I am not, thanks to your orders, and Miranda is XO and will handle things from here. I will be needed in enyineering soon enough. I'm seeing to it that you are fixed up and quick."

"Tali," he protested.

"We are bonding in three nights Yahn, and you are going to be healthy for it!" she countered. "And you have yust saved the Galaxy . . . again. You get some down time."

"Tali!" he shouted and winced.

"Doctor's orders," intruded Karin. "Down Commander, in this bay, I rule!"

Shepherd lay down on the cot grumbling while Karin began the examination. On the other side, Tali was looking down at him. Her eyes glowing through her visor. He smiled briefly.

"I guess I get to see you smile again," he whispered.

"Yes you do," she replied. And removed her visor for a brief moment. She smiled, blinking back the tears, and then kissed him. And then snapped the visor back on. Then she wiped one of the tear drops which had fallen on his cheek off with her finger.

"You're going to get the sniffles for that," he suggested.

"Totally worth it," was her response. Then she had a sneezing jag for a few seconds and couldn't say anything else while Karin looked at her and shook her head.

"You're going to have to wait for the anti-allergens," said Karin looking at Tali. "I have your Commander to treat first. Three broken ribs from catching a falling beam, no doubt trying to show off."

"I'll be fine in yust a moment," replied Tali sniffling. "I'm mostly adapted to the Normandy, the air in the entire ship reaches the cabin sooner or later. I've done this in enyineering as well when I need to see something up close."

Karin nodded and injected a calming sedative into John. "You will of course be free to visit him anytime," she interjected. "Not that I think I could keep you out of here anyway. Territorial girl that you are." Karin smiled at Tali.

"Good to know you understand," Tali replied.

"Bonding in three nights?" queried Karin.

"Yes," replied Tali.

Karin sighed. "I don't know how well he'll be for that . . ."

"I'll be yentle with him," suggested Tali. "It will be my first time."

Karin opened her mouth to suggest there was something not entirely logical about that chain of thought, but decided against it. Tali remained and held one of John's hands with both of hers, looping her four total fingers between his total four. And there she remained until EDI and Legion came back with the status report.

The report wasn't just bad, it was nearly hopeless. Nearly every system had suffered some damage. The life support could only maintain for another five days because so much energy was being diverted to maintain the atmosphere in cargo from the hull breach. As Legion and EDI proceeded with the report, Tali watched Ken and Gabby pale. Gabby began to hold on to Kenneth's arm. It was nearly, but not yet entirely hopeless. And they still had all those Geth platforms from the Alarei.

"We get the breach in the hull repaired first," concluded Tali, and we gain eneryee for maintaining life support. Then we fix life support, and we spend even less eneryee on it. We thus buy time for fixing the enyines which will get is through the Mass Relay."

"But lassy, how are we gonna get the hull patched up?" queried Ken.

"If I had my mask off," began Tali. "You would be seeing me smile. We send the Geth out to collect scrap from the accretion disk. We plug the hole. They can probably do it in one day or less."

"21 hours, 38 minutes, 16 seconds estimate," stated Legion. "Geth platforms will be glad to assist Creator Tali'Zorah."

"Do ye think we'll be able to find any other parts out there?" continued Kenneth.

"Due to hazards of space and persistent collisions any functioning technology is highly unlikely, estimate odds of finding such are 1 in 32,476,395,581," suggested Legion.

"But even if we find copper or silicon," argued Gabby. "We can always fashion it."

"Odds of not finding employable scrap 1 in 3,490,008," continued Legion.

"There!" concluded Tali. "They'll bring in copper and silicon, I'll start to weld up the circuitry, and we'll have things fixed in no time. And more over . . ."

She walked over to the window and looked out at the vast sea of tumbling ship wreckage. It would be a treasure trove for the Migrant Fleet.

"We'll probably get other help too," she concluded.

"From where?" asked Gabby incredulous.

"The Migrant Fleet," answered Tali. "They can't be more than six or seven days cruise from here. They'll arrive and we'll have more help, and at least a chance to rechargh our life support."

"Lassy? Are ye sayin that that fleet 'o space gypsies is going to drop everythin' and come here to be our buddies?"

"See that scrap out there?" answered Tali pointing out the window. "They'll come for that. And they'll love us for giving it to them."

The next three days were filled with frenzied activity. The Geth, led by Legion, proved adept at space flight with their platforms alone and were bringing in sheets of metal within three hours of departing. While the patchwork obviously looked like patchwork, with multiple metallic colors all blending and clashing, the hull was at full integrity a full six seconds sooner than Legion's initial estimate. That extra six seconds of energy translated into another oxygen scrub which added another 1.5 hours to life support. The Normandy now had a full ten days of life support energy. All non-essential crew were in an enforced sleep schedule since they consumed less oxygen while doing so.

The scrap for the repairs of the micro-circuitry and other systems likewise continued to come in. Every time Tali had enough to keep herself busy for a few hours fixing the various boards, she would haul them into the Medical Bay and fix them on a makeshift table next to John, who was sleeping for the most part, so that his ribs might heal up sufficiently. Each trip back with repaired boards added one or two more hours of energy to the life support systems. She only slept in snatches, working a full sixteen to eighteen hours a day, adopting a four on two off plan which kept her alert enough to spot new problems as they came up. Each repair often led to the discovery of damage further down the line.

It was the 12th of October, 2200 hours. Tali's heart was pounding with anticipation. John in the meantime, was still asleep down in the medical bay. The stress of the missions, and the broken ribs, had proven far more exhaustive than anyone had anticipated. He had been so adept at hiding his exhaustion from the stress. Now that he had enforced rest, he had simply slept the entire time.

But she was tired of waiting, and over the past three days, they had gotten the engines to generate a bit more energy which enabled the Normandy's life supports to maintain the crew for another two weeks. All they had to do was hold out for the Migrant Fleet, who had already committed to sending a single scout ship through the Relay. Given the notoriety of the Relay, it was an all volunteer team lead by Kal'Reeger. There were only six on board, three of which were engineers. But if they made it, the Fleet would be able to send more soon enough. Given the other supplies in the ship, the most they could squeeze out was another four to eight days at most, then they would run out of water and oxygen. But if this one scout ship came in, there would be another day added to the life supports in the form of supplies and energy.

"Eighteen days to live," she mused. But if such were the case, she and her Yahn would die together, and in each other's arms if she could arrange it. And she would die happy. Because she was going to bond with him, even if she had to wake him up to do it. Karin was sleeping, she spent most of her time checking other's sleeping methods to ensure they were remaining calm and collected, and now it was her turn. Tali thus was able to gently roll her Yahn's cot out of the Medical Bay and up to their cabin. They went up the elevator together, while he was gently snoring. And then she rolled him into the cabin and suddenly realized there was something she had overlooked.

The cot was not big enough for the two of them, how was she going to get him into the bed? Well that would be a problem dealt with shortly, right now, she needed to make herself presentable.

She got out of her suit and then spent a few moments trying to decide if she wanted to wear the poncho, which would cover her, but come off much faster, or the night gown, which would be more appropriate for bed, but would be a bit harder to remove. Of course she briefly flirted with the idea of gently guiding him into the bed while she was already naked, but in order for her to be able to do that without panicking, she would need the lights off and then she would have a hard time of it since John could not see as well in the dark as she could. She decided on the poncho, with her necklace around her throat. She would need the lights on and she looked nicer in the poncho.

"Yahn?" she whispered. "Time to get into your bed."

"Eh?" grumbled John. He shifted.

"Already in bed Ducky," he said. "Night Night."

"Yahn, not that bed, this bed."

"Already in bed Ducky, sleepy."

"Yahn, it's time to make love to me," she tried a new tact.

"Wha?"

He was still very groggy and nearly turned over and fell asleep again. She sighed. Why did it have to be so hard for them?

"Yahn?" she thought of another way. "I'm naked."

His hand groped at his sheet and held it up for her. She sighed. But his hand was out and so she gripped it and his arm and began to work him out of the cot.

"Gently Yahn," she said. "You have to get up now. It's time for . . ."

"What did Dr. Chakwas give me," he groaned staggering and leaning against her. She was having a hard time dealing with his weight.

"A sedative stronger than I would have liked," she answered.

The two of them tumbled upon their own bed. John, still horribly groggy, simply crawled under the blankets and was snoring in a matter of seconds. And Tali sat there for a moment, looking no doubt very sexy in just a poncho and chain necklace. Well, there was nothing for it but to wait for the sedative to wear off, and she would make sure he would be sufficiently motivated when he did start to wake up. She removed her necklace and poncho, and slipped into the sheets next to him and snuggled up, slipping her hands under his sweats, and commencing a bit of exploring. And while she achieved a certain level of arousal in him, he remained completely asleep. And she was exhausted too, and once he started to snore, she started to heelrou, and then she was asleep as well.

Seven hours later, John woke up and discovered that there was a very naked Tali next to him with her hand under his sweats. He then remembered what time it was. And there had been the most erotic of dreams in the night. And those had put ideas into his head. He looked at her sleeping face, so gentle and sweet. He smiled, snuggled up to her, and proceeded to run his hand down her back all the way to her thighs. She suddenly began heelrou again, opened her eyes, and looked at him.

And pounced.

The act of making love between a couple is a special time, intimate and not at all the sort of thing for spectators. And it is out of respect for the couple that responsible authors fade to black.

But forty five minutes later, as the clock showed 0756, he was on his back and she was snuggled up to him, blissfully happy, euphoric that her bonding to him was complete.

She was awake, but had her eyes shut in a relaxed sort of manner.

"Was it good for you?" asked John.

"Yahn?" she replied with a hint of giggle. "It was my first time, to what do I have to compare it with?"

"It didn't hurt?"

"Why would it? You were um . . . Really big there . . . Especially at the end. I thought . . . Oh I don't know. About then was when I felt I was floating away," she mused. She giggled a bit. "Yeah it was good, okay? How about you?"

"Well, it was the first time with this body, and it was . . ." he thought for a second. "Special. It was with you and that was what was the most important. It was really crazy there, you latched on with your feet around my ankles, human girls don't do that. And of course they don't hug like you do either. It was just so unique. You also kept insisting that we kiss the entire time. Again, that doesn't normally happen between human couples."

"Well I suppose we both would find things odd about it," she replied. "I am Quarian, you are Human, but it's nice that while it was a lot different, it was also a lot alike. If we couldn't, I can't imayine how frustrating it would turn out for us."

"Some how Tali Duck, I suspect that if we couldn't, we never would have fallen in love."

"Maybe," she replied. "I hope so. In the meantime, maybe I need to catch you up on the ship's progress?"

"How bad is it?"

"We could be dead in another eighteen days," she observed. "That's how much food, oxyyen, and eneryee we have left. But we never expected we'd get this far when we came here. We are drifting yust two and a half million kilometers from the Omega 4 Relay. Might as well be two and a half light years. Everything we have is being channeled towards life support. Just about everyone except me, Ken, Gabby, Leyion, and EDI are asleep in pods conserving air."

"What have you done about it?" he asked, trying to sound calm. Somehow, with a cuddling Tali next to him, it was easier to do than he had anticipated.

We started out with only five days of life support," she replied. "Leyion and the Geth have been scouring the accretion disk for scrap and stuff. We're rebuilding. I also took the liberty of sending the IFF to the Migrant Fleet. Offered the entire disk in exchange for enyineers, eneryee, and air. Kal'Reeger is due in two days with the first scout ship."

"You sent the IFF to the Migrant Fleet!" exclaimed John.

"Yes?" she said with a bit of tremor in her voice.

"That was so sweet of you," he said. "And brilliant. It never would have dawned on me to do so but Tali? Once they get here, we'll be crawling with Quarian Engineers."

"I hope so," she sighed.

"Speaking of crawling," continued John.

And there was another forty minutes of lovemaking followed by ten minutes of just holding.

As things wrapped up, John stretched himself out while Tali snuggled up with the sheet and looked at him. He got up and walked to the head while she watched him depart and giggled. Human guys looked just silly walking away naked from you. She stretched herself and kicked off the blankets. There was a bit of goop on the lower sheet. She sighed and got up and stripped the bed. Then tossed the sheets into the hamper. She looked at herself in the mirror. She was now bonded, and yet she didn't seem to look any different. Something profound had happened. There was a change, was it maturity? Or was it the acceptance of new responsibility? She wasn't sure. She looked at the black whorls which ran down her front from her neck to her legs. Would John like those markings? She didn't know. All she remembered was his inadvertent slip that he had found her breasts cute.

She sighed once again. And started the process of putting on her suit. There on the back of her chair was her poncho and on the desk was her necklace. All that speculation and fantasy and planning for naught. All that timing and announcement and it turned out they didn't get to make love until this morning. Even so, it had been wonderful. She smiled as she turned on her cleansing procedures and felt the suit's scrubbers running over her skin as they had done so often in the past. There was a bit of 'extra' cleaning in a particular spot thanks to the fact that she had been engaged in loving someone, and she smiled at the thought that now things were just a bit different. She pulled her boots on but kept her hands and head out. She liked brushing her hair and John was still busy in the bathroom anyway. He came out, his hair dry.

"Didn't you shower?"

"Why when there's shortages?" he answered. "I used just enough soap and water in the sink to wash all the parts that just got dirty." Then he grinned. "It wasn't that big an area."

"Don't know about it not being that big," she replied back with a wink. "Given the two experiences I have had with it's size so far."

"Things are different now aren't they?" he observed.

"Yeah," she said. "We're . . . bonded now."

"So I'm stuck with you eh?" he said. He tried to grin but there was a sudden brief flash of fear in his eyes.

She looked curiously at him. He shook his head.

"Sorry about that," he said. "It just hit me. We are together until death do us part. It kind of freaked me out for a moment."

"Sort of like me thinking about being naked with you and throwing the sheets up every time I had the chance?"

"About that," he said. "But I've got no sheets to cover myself with now."

"I guess not," she said smiling and putting her arms around him.

"Well, off to work," he said. "Coming?"

"Of course," she said. "We have our cook back, he can make breakfast."

"Yeah, we have a cook," replied John with a relieved smile.

"And that implies what?" she asked.

Whether or not she ended up punching him in the arm on the elevator ride down remains one of those mysteries as the author did not get back to them until they stepped out. Gardener the cook was up and out of his pod, he woke up at meal time to cook in order to keep what skeletal crew was up fed. And even the sleepers needed to get up about every 8 hours for something.

"Hey congratulations," said Gardner. "How are the newlyweds?"

John stopped and looked at him.

"Fine," he said.

"Not used to it yet eh?"

"Nope. What's for breakfast?"

"Well given that you all just got married, and given that there was a planned reception for tonight, though if you delay it until we know we're all going to live that would be fine, I thought we'd do a chicken fried burger, with eggs, fried potatoes, biscuits, gravy, fresh tangerine juice, and hot coffee."

"Nice," suggested John. "Gardner I think it appropriate to tell you that you were really missed while you were gone."

"I love you too, Yahn," suggested Tali.

Kenneth and Gabby showed up five minutes later. Kenneth took the opportunity to suggest that the only thing that smelled better than Gardener's cooking was Gabby's . . . But then he checked himself as John and Tali stared at him.

Gabby was blushing furiously.

"We've had a bit o' stress relief on our off times," explained Kenneth.

Tali took the opportunity to change the subject by asking about the latest status reports on the engines. The news was both encouraging and discouraging. The engines were now up to 3% propulsion power, which meant that over the next six years, they could get to the Relay and shoot through.

"But with just a wee one more percent," joked Kenneth. "We'll be deflowerin' the Relay in three years."

"Kenneth, do you ever stop?" asked Gabby.

"No lassie I dinnae stop," he answered.

She sighed and rolled her eyes. Then she remembered.

"Tali? What's it like being married?" she asked.

Tali paused. "It's different. But it seems natural. Like I'm supposed to be here. It's . . . nice."

"So when do you all break out the beer barrel?" queried Kenneth.

"Well the plan was for tonight," admitted John. "But like everything else so far, I suspect there will be some delays."

"Like survivin' this I'm thinking," mused Kenneth.

Gabby looked panicked at him.

"Now lassie, we'll be pullin' through. We're under the command of Commander Shepherd and we have the best Quarian engineer in the galaxy helpin' us fix things."

"We would be dead already if it hadn't been for you two," added Shepherd. "And don't forget it."

The conversation at the breakfast table was almost exclusively engineering, little of which John understood though Tali had enlightened him on many aspects over the past few months. He did however keep looking at her and pondering the surreal quality of the day. When everyone finished, he followed them down into Engineering.

"What are you doin' here Commander?" asked Kenneth.

"The Normandy is drifting through space, just keeping in orbit above the disk, there isn't much I have to command, might as well twist a wrench with you," he answered. "Otherwise I'm just sucking oxygen."

"Commander?" protested Gabby. "It's kind of hard imagining us telling you to do anything."

"Not me," replied Tali. "Here Yahn, take these coils and prepare to pass them up to Gabby as she goes down the vents."

"There see lassie?" replied Kenneth. "The wife rules even when it's Commander Shepherd."

John took a second to laugh and then he got to work with them pausing only to comment that Kenneth would find out soon enough from Gabby if he kept 'relieving tension' with her.

And so the next two days passed in hard work and labor. John learned more about the interior of ship's than he had ever imagined, and found it both painful, frustrating, fascinating, and rewarding. And every evening, they would retire, fall into bed exhausted, or if they were not exhausted, make love. And then when they woke up, they made love. Then it would be back down to the engineering room for more work.

Then on the third day, the Normandy paused in anticipation as Kal'Reegar signaled that they were ready to come through the Relay. Joker was there sending last minute reports making sure they pulled up the moment they decelerated so they wouldn't slam into the debris. With breathless anticipation and terror, Tali, Joker, Shepherd, Kenneth, and Gabby watched the relay. EDI and Legion merely watched as they could not breath or feel terror.

Suddenly the Quarian vessel popped into view, banked up fiercely, barely missed a massive wreak, and settled down and cruised over to the Normandy in a matter of moments.

Kal'Reeger sent a new radio message.

"Ma'am, you have achieved the leyendary. This is a treasure trove without price," he said. "If you could hear the excitement of the three enyineers behind me you wouldn't be able to hear me."

Within a matter of days, over two hundred Quarian vessels had come through, and were in the process of not only breaking down hundreds of the wreaks, but clearing a pathway through the disk so that ships would have a safer time arriving. It was one of the most exciting times on the Migrant Fleet, and Tail's status rose considerably. So great was the impact of this 'gift', that generations later, the legend of Tali'Zorah would be a popular folk heroine who gave keys which unlocked great treasures in Quarian folk lore.

And the Normandy was rapidly being entirely repaired. But more importantly, those engineers who were on the Normandy assisting with repairs, were getting a first hand experience of working with the Geth platforms. By the time things were fixed a week later, the Quarians had names for all the platforms and Tali had once again gained a level of status as the news of the last few weeks of the Normandy began to filter through the fleet.

It was not the sort of Honeymoon that newlywed couples planned, but John and Tali would not have traded it for the world . . . Once of course sufficient time had passed for the stress of those days to be sponged out of the memories.


	20. Chapter 20 - E-mails From The Apocalypse

_The nine months between the destruction of the Collector Base and the Reaper invasion are often skimmed over in many histories as everyone seems to think that nothing more important happened save for the destruction of the Alpha Relay, of which debate still rages (among those who actually care) on its legitimacy. For this reason, it is often assumed that John's arrest by the Alliance was primarily due to his Cerberus connections. While Cerberus was notorious for it's terrorist tactics, not all Cerberus members were ever engaged in behaviors of a criminal nature, specifically those on the Normandy up to and through the destruction of the Collector Base. . ._

_. . . With the surrender of the Normandy on the 17th of January in the year 2186, John was formerly charged with Genocide, an action which was done to appease the Batarians who were screaming for blood. Jeff Moreau was likewise arrested as an accessory, but he was quietly reinstated as the pilot of the Normandy thanks in part to EDI's deceit. She pretended to be a VI incapable of operating without Mr. Moreau's direct assistance, and as the technicians and engineers were discovering that nothing seemed to be working vis a vis the soft and hardware, they quickly accepted the notion. She had help in this deceit. Her pet Geth program, Bytes, would play the software which governed the specific hardware the engineers were trying to operate. As Bytes was a dumb little thing on his own, he quickly made a mess of anything which the engineers were trying to work. They even brought back Kenneth and Gabby, who were secretly instructed by EDI, and they quickly confirmed that Jeff was a necessary accessory to the operation of the Normandy. Unless of course they wanted to spend the eighteen months necessary to entirely reprogram the Normandy. Jeff was brought back, reinstated, and immediately the Normandy sprang back to life._

_Another of the ironies of the arrest was the fact that the Normandy was stationed in Vancouver, where John was also placed under house arrest. One could almost see an invisible hand putting all the pieces into place, for Vancouver was not the first place attacked, that target was London, and so by the time the Reapers arrived, fifteen minutes after London had received the first strike, a full alert had already gone out and the Normandy was already airborne. Shortly afterwards, she picked up John._

_Circumstances might have also saved a few other lives. Garrus was sent back to Palavan and Tali was sent back to the Migrant Fleet. Grunt was likewise sent to Tuchanka. Thane retired to the Citadel where he spent his time with his son. Jacob, Kelly, and Miranda 'disappeared' thanks in part to my intervention, and the rest of the Cerberus crew either returned to Cerberus (an action which lead to many of their deaths shortly) or joined with the Alliance Navy, such as Dr. Karin Chakwas, Kenneth, and Gabby._

_From "The Man Tali Loved"_

* * *

_July 15th, 2186_

_My dearest Tali Duck,_

_It is so utterly boring here in Vancouver. Of course you know I'm stuck in this side street apartment. No view of the bay for me, not even a park. My only contact with the outside world is my guard. I've told you about him already, Vega. He's been talking about the news of late and there's getting to be some concern as some of our outlying colonies have just gone silent. And it seems every hour there's news of another one going down. So far that's all I'm getting. I don't know for sure what it means, but if it's what I fear it means, I just wanted to tell you again._

_I will always love you._

_Hang in there Kitten, I know that being an Admiral now has been driving you crazy, and your report that Legion has suddenly gone silent does not bode well for what chance we have of any peace between your people and the Geth._

_I keep dreaming of the day when there will be no more Reapers, no more politics, and all there will be is you and me in our own home, a few adopted kids to keep the windows breaking and nights watching the sunset with you in my arms making happy noise. I have never in my life had such an ache in my heart as I do now. More than once in these six months I have wished that you didn't have to remain on the Migrant Fleet, but as far as the politicians seem to see it, we're all a pack of terrorists and the only reasons why you're not in a woman's prison here on Earth was Fleet's demand that you be extradited for your 'crimes'. Tell your Admiral Auntie Raan that I owe her a very big favor because given how they treated Joker, I have little doubt they would not have let you stay in your suit once they had put you in that prison, you would have died, and they would have said 'Oops'._

_Joker tells me that everything on the Normandy is fine again. EDI has fully flummoxed the refit teams and is once again in full control of the ship. Dr. Chakwas has also been re-assigned, all it lacks is it's wonderful Monkey Duck Engineer. Kenneth and Gabby likewise wish you well. Kenneth had a good scare the other week. And I do mean really good scare, the sort that makes a guy start to grow up. Gabby's period was three weeks late. He's thinking finally about proposing to her as soon as he can get an apartment for the two of them. I've told him he's doing the right thing._

_I loved your last letter, and don't feel guilty if you can't think of something to say the moment you get mine. The one's you think about the most before you post usually are the one's I most treasure because that's when you really tell me what you are thinking about and feeling. And it's selfish of me I know, but when you talk about how much you miss me, I'm so happy to hear that. I'd hate to hear you tell me of all the wonderful times you are having on the Migrant Fleet, playing politics, without me._

_I know I should want you to be happy, but frankly I'm such a selfish jerk I prefer hearing that you are miserable without me. Please forgive my ego._

_I love you forever,_

_Your John_

Tali reread the letter and sighed. She paused and looked out the window of her office in the Admiralty on the Neema. She was in luxury now on the Migrant Fleet. Her popularity and adventures had so captured the hearts and minds of her fellow Quarians that she was now an Admiral, and got to sit in her own chair at each of the Admiralty meetings having to listen and nod politely to each of the Admirals who, just last year, tried to exile her from the fleet for treason. She really missed her shotgun on numerous occasions.

Auntie Raan however provided her with much needed solace at times. She was at least a hand to hold during the occasional crying jags which came from missing John so much. It was not the grief she had experienced when she had heard he was dead. That grief had been sharp and sadistic, it had been the pain of seeing something placed into the palm of the hand and then brutally snatched away. This was simply the pain of separation of family, of a dearly loved one for reasons which, while hard, were necessary.

It didn't make it any easier of course. She missed his arms as much as he missed hers. And she remained firmly convinced that he never would have made that decision if she had been there. She would have seen through the trick because she was certain that is what it was. Only a Reaper could have come up with something that would make him think he had to destroy that Relay and ended up killing all those Batarians. She found it hard to sympathize with the Batarians. Their pirates and slave runs were something every single Quarian feared, especially on pilgrimage.

She leaned back and looked over her luxurious room. It was a full four meters by three meters in size. There was a very nice hardwood bunk over a set of shelves and drawers for the storage of memorabilia. She had a desk with a window looking out over the fleet. There was her own private ventilation shaft which blew fresh air in all the time. There were clean and colorful tapestries hanging on the walls, and her own private food box, chilled, and a hot surface for the heating up of meals and beverages. And of course her own grinder so that when she had cooked up something, she could process it into her own set of tubes and serve dinner to her friends. Auntie Raan now came every third night. Kal'Reeger she had over with Auntie Raan every other third night. He alone was a fellow Quarian who had experienced missions with her and she trusted him implicitly. He was always polite and never offered his opinion until he was asked it and even then, he was as self-effacing as she had been before she had been embraced by John. Tali liked cooking for her friends, it gave her something to do, something to think about and plan for and during these dinners, she could discuss their latest efforts to head off the war talk or at least remember her all too brief time with John as her bond-mate. She mostly reserved the talks about John with Auntie. Kal found such talks somewhat dull.

She paused to once again review all that had happened.

The Normandy had spent two weeks in orbit around the black hole which had been the system for the Collector Base. By the end of the 14th day, she was back up to full functionality and there was only the brief hop over to Omega for new food and water.

So John had broken out the Beer Barrel and they had their reception with the whole crew. There had been on brief and somewhat embarrassing moment when Kelly, having drunk a bit more than she ought to have, suggested that John had not gotten a proper bachelor's party and offered to be the dancer. Most of the guys on the crew heartily agreed with the idea but Tali had offered to get her pistol (since she reserved her shotgun for Garrus) and that was the end of that.

Of course she herself had wowed the crew for a moment. She had taken off her mask for a pair of seconds to give Joker and Garrus each kisses on the forehead for all the friendship and support they had been giving her over the years, both on the original and new Normandy. She felt confidant enough because she had come very close to adapting to the entire Normandy. There had been more than a few whistles from the guys of the crew who had never seen a Quarian girl's face before and apparently were impressed. Then she spent three minutes sneezing, sniffling, and dealing with watery eyes and swollen lips.

"Totally worth it?" queried John with a raised eyebrow.

"I'll get back to you," she answered.

Garrus then had stood up and had given a brief but touching speech on how lucky John was to have such a pretty wife and had he known she was that sweet and attractive, he would have thought seriously about swearing off being the guy who got all the other girls. He concluded that he probably would not have sworn off them but to have to actually think about it told volumes about her qualities. Joker merely observed that if she wasn't careful, EDI would get jealous to which EDI asked if this wasn't a suggestion that her relationship with Joker was more than platonic? Joker blushed, suggested such a question was creepy, then insisted it was a joke, and then stammered and waved his hands around and EDI suggested he needed another beer to calm himself down and he agreed.

Now happily married and on the Normandy, she did not hesitate to get completely and totally drunk and John smiled to himself remembering Illium. He said nothing however, but after the party was breaking up, he gently led his swaying giggling hiccuping and flirty wife up to their room where, leaving the lights entirely on, he helped her out of her suit. While she suggested he was forward, fresh, and taking advantage of his drunken very aroused bond mate, he gently pushed her onto the bed so she flopped down entirely naked for his viewing pleasure. Her response was to wiggle a pair of toes at him and ask him if he were just there to enjoy the view or do something about it. He replied that he would do something about it after he had enjoyed the view and she, being entirely drunk, was more than complying.

He then proceeded to complement her on everything from the waist up. Then he turned off the lights and joined her.

The next morning, was a different affair altogether.

"Yahn," she began with a high pitched whine as he and she were in the process of waking up. "I feel so sick, my head hurts, why didn't you run my detox last night?"

"You didn't have your suit on when you fell asleep," suggested John with a smile that suggested way more than it's subtle muscular shift would allow.

She was still wrapped up in the sheets of the bed, though one shoulder was out.

"Why wasn't I in my suit?" she groaned.

"You wanted me to remove it," he said.

"And you were more than willing weren't you," she growled.

"You are my wife you know," he argued back.

She looked at him for a moment, her eyes not at all pink because she had a frowny face. But he quickly realized it was more from the discomfort of the hangover than any other reason.

"Did . . . Did you think I was . . . pretty?" she asked. There was a bit of anxiety in that tone of voice

"Yes I did," answered John, who snuggled up to her. "I thought you were very pretty and I enjoyed looking at you the whole time.

She whimpered and covered her head with her sheet for a moment while he simply smiled and waited. Then she peeked out from beneath them.

"You mean it?" she asked.

"I mean it," he replied. "I really mean it. I thought you were very pretty and every nice and pretty part I complimented. But you know what is the prettiest part of you?"

She looked at him, her eyes a little pink and her body scrunched just a little more in the sheets.

"What?" she asked.

"Your face. Everything else will get old and flabby but your face will always remain sweet and pretty. And your eyes, I love your eyes the most."

She remained looking at him with the sheet wrapped around her, but then she gave him a very loving glance with the slightest hint of a smile, before her hangover reminded her that she was in pain. Then he went into the head to clean himself up and she got into her suit and began running her anti-hangover remedies. That morning, they said goodbye to the Quarian Engineers, and left the system to the Migrant Fleet's salvage ships.

The next trip had been to escort the Geth platforms to the collective which was accomplished with little difficulty. Legion informed John and Tali that he would continue to send information to EDI who would channel it to Tali, since John insisted that the peace treaty would be brokered by Tali and not him. Legion quickly informed them that consensus was going to be long and hard since there were already 'incidents' on the boarders of Geth space where small Quarian patrol vessels were taking pot shots at individual Geth patrols. It was the first sign that Admiral Gerrel was engaged in his own version of underhanded dealings though John and Tali were as of yet unaware this was being directed by the war party in the Migrant Fleet. As the attacks and raids got increasingly hostile, the odds of peace became increasingly remote. But because of the way Admiral Gerrel deftly handled the steady provocations, the Normandy remained persistently out of the loop for a few more weeks.

Then it was back to Illium where Liara joined up and they pursued and took down the Shadow Broker. Liara deftly and cooly stepped into his shoes leaving his operatives none the wiser. The Shadow Broker's own style had been his own downfall since no one ever knew what he had looked like or even sounded.

And then it was Christmas. It was Tali's second Christmas and John got her a bracelet and a box of dextro chocolate. She got him a ship's model and sufficient Ezo so that he would be able to make it fly around the room with his omni-tool. Well not exactly him to make it fly, she was the only one who knew how to make a ship's model fly through the room, but he got to build it . . . mostly. She informed him, after a very serious love making session after the Christmas party, that this Christmas was way better than her first Christmas.

And then it was the 'favor' for Admiral Hackett. It sounded simple enough on the surface. A deep operative named Dr. Amanda Kenson who was operating in Batarian space and claimed that she had information regarding a new Reaper plan of attack which was about to begin. The problem was that since then she had been captured by the Batarians, she needed to be freed. The orders demanded that John go in alone. Tali objected most strongly but John was of the opinion that given he was about to break into a Batarian prison system, the team would make so much of a 'bang' that any chance of subterfuge would be lost.

It ended with John on an asteroid with a base next to the Mass Relay where, according to Dr. Kenson, the Reapers were about to arrive. Then she attacked John, incapacitated him, and kept him sedated for a period of time. John recovered, fought his way to the control room, signaled the Normandy who had been in stealth minutes from the base, and then had a decision to make.

Either the Reapers were coming or they were not. He decided that it would be best to assume that they would, and drove the Asteroid into the Mass Relay, destroying it, and most of the Solar System's infrastructure that had been built by the Batarian colonists, both that which was in orbit, and which was on the ground. Three hundred thousand Batarian colonists died immediately or shortly thereafter as a result of this decision. Admiral Hacket informed him that he deserved a medal, but likewise the politicians were going to demand his blood.

Once she knew what was going to happen when the Normandy formerly surrendered to the Alliance, she went into a series of crying jags because she was going to be separated from John for who knew how long. As they made their way back to Earth, her need for him to make love to her increased in intensity. And every single moment she could justify it (she still insisted on working 16 hours a day) she spent with him, usually in physical contact.

There were also some pretty nasty fights since as January proceeded and Earth got closer she began to place some of the blame on what was about to happen on him, concluding that she never would have fallen for such a transparent trick and it was his mistake in going alone. He argued back that she probably would have been killed as they would not have given a damn about her life, he still did not understand why he had been spared at all, but that in her mind was the 'proof' that it had been a trick. For if the Reapers really had intended to use the Alpha Relay to invade, they would have wanted him dead. John of course pointed that they had tried that already and all that had happened was that he had been sent back. The fights always however ended in tears and her holding on to him because once her anger was spent, the fear of the up coming separation would take precedence and she was once again needing him to be there so she could hold on. There had been times when John was so upset and angry over her wild mood swings that it took more than a little willpower on his own to just allow her to vent and get her grief out. His arm ended up particularly sore before it was over with.

But the night before they reached Earth, she did her best to let John only see her love for him. It was going to be their last night, and in spite of the grief, she was determined to be the most loving of bond mates. They spent nearly the whole night up, making love, then reminiscing about all their adventures, sharing events from their childhoods and growing up, and then making love some more. They finally fell asleep, exhausted from the stress and anger and grief three hours out of Earth, and then the Normandy had landed, and as soon as the doors had opened, a swat team of cops had charged in and thrown everyone to the ground. Joker suffered from multiple fractures since of course no one had bothered informing the police that he suffered from Vrolic's syndrome.

So much for a formal surrender.

John had been treated as roughly and rudely as possible. She had nearly lost it at that point as they had led John away in cuffs calling him a murderer with dozens of smug reporters happily announcing that the fear monger paranoid blood thirsty bastard was finally going to face justice for all his terrorists ways. It had taken both Garrus and Grunt holding her back as she screamed and cried and tried to fight. She ended up on the news as well, an example of the deviancy of John Michael Shepherd, who had gotten mixed up with an alien female who was so bizarre and ugly, she had to hide behind a suit and mask. A full ten minutes of air time were devoted to the 'criminal' tendencies of the Quarians and some very unsettling artistic renderings of Quarian physiology were passed off as genuine articles for the viewing public. Of course there was also the referencing of Krogan brutality and the fact that the Turians had already fought a war with humans, so Grunt and Garrus were dragged into the mud as well. Dr. Mordin Solus was ignored since he did not show up to try to keep her from doing something dumb during her high state of emotions. Indeed, so eager were the press to report the arrest of the 'terrorist' that they actually remained oblivious to the presence of a published and well known Salarian professor.

She shortly thereafter got a very apologetic letter from Admiral Hackett who took full responsibility for failing to realize that the politicians had decided on 'making an example' of John. While the Navy trusted John sufficiently to believe him when he warned of the Reapers, the politicians had persistently denied the threat and when John had once again, by his behavior (starting with the Collector Missions with Cerberus) reminded them that there was this threat out there, they had been looking for a reason to shut him up and down. Of course everyone on the crew, starting with Miranda and Jacob, could see the fingers of Cerberus behind matters as well.

Once the reporters had dashed off to run their stories, the Navy had sent in their N7 special ops and had - at the threat of gunpoint - removed John Michael Shepherd (and the rest of the crew) from the police station and taken them to military incarceration. Hackett and Anderson could not 'make examples' of the politicians who had pulled the strings to make the surrender as brutal as possible, but they could make examples of the police who backed down quickly enough due to the very real fact that what they had done was entirely unjustified on any grounds given that the entire ship was returning to surrender. There they had quietly moved him to house arrest and had introduced him to his 'body guard' James Vega, an American hispanic who was a body builder in his spare time. John and he got along well and things settled out for him. Once Dr. Chakwas had been released from her arrest, she was able to get over to Joker's hospital room and work with the doctors there to get Joker back up on his feet. Shortly thereafter, the Navy, at it's wit's end with the failure of the Normandy to respond to normal functions, quietly moved Joker and Dr. Chakwas back to the ship where the refitting for military service began to make progress.

On the surface for Tali, things initially were looking up. She had returned to the Migrant Fleet, in handcuffs, which were promptly removed the moment the police left. And then she was given full honors and formally installed as Admiral. Thanks to some very good discretion by the Quarian media, no one ever knew she had arrived in handcuffs. She was very popular with the common Quarians and they had rallied around her as news of the arrest of John her bond-mate became known for none of them wanted to see their heroine sad. They understood why she fought for him, and likewise it was clear that those who hated him hated Quarians as well, which only proved that he was a good bond-mate for her, in spite of the fact that he was human.

Her ambition as Admiral was trying to keep the Migrant Fleet from going to war with the Geth. And given the ancient fears that the Quarians had for the Geth as a whole she was constantly losing ground. She was slowly losing popularity as well since the peace treaty which was to return Rannoch had not materialized. The common Quarians did not link Admiral Gerrel's war mongering to the rising tensions between the Quarians and the Geth, for Admiral Gerrel did not report his quiet behind closed door orders and understandings with the ship's captains who were engaged in the attacks. All they knew was that Tali had not made it happen, and that had to be a failure on her part for sure.

She needed her Yahn to make it all better. And her Yahn was not going to be there to make it all better for the near future. So she printed out his latest missive, put it in a little box with all the other e-mail missives of his she had printed out, and went back to the dull annoying and frustrating work of politics. And continued to miss him, especially at night, for the next two days.

And then came July 17th, and right in the middle of the day, she began to have a horrible feeling that something was wrong. And she began to tremble, for she had experienced these feelings before, when the first Normandy was falling into the atmosphere of a cold planet.

She sent off an extra-net letter to John immediately, "What is wrong?" was all she sent. And she closed her eyes in gratitude when the letter did not trigger a bad address. And she nearly sobbed in relief when John's answer came, fifteen minutes later.

_Darling Tali,_

_I got your e-mail and knew you were feeling fearful for I remember what you told me you had experienced the first time I died, and believe me darling, it was almost just as bad or rather, is even worse._

_The Reapers have landed on Earth._

_I was woken up this morning by Vega and Anderson. Over the past two days the fleets have been mobilizing and the Navy has been in a state of high alert. One by one we lost contact with our colonies and then we started losing contact within the solar system just today, early this morning. The politicians were in a panic and they promptly called me up and asked me what they were supposed to do?_

_And what was I supposed to say? What they were supposed to do was what I had been telling them to do for the past two years. It was, as you imagine, entirely too late. Then London was attacked, and as they sat there in a panic for fifteen minutes, I told them what had to be done and they still refused to do it. They just sat there terrified._

_And then the Reapers landed in Vancouver and started to blow the whole place up. Most of those politicians are dead now, and I am having a hard time feeling sorry for them._

_Anderson, Kaiden, Vega, and I made it to the Normandy and then Anderson stayed behind. He's going to lead the defense of Earth. I am to find help where I can get it. As I write this, we are on our way to Mars were information on some Prothean dig might lend us a hand. Kaiden and I are patching things up and he wants you to know he's sorry and hopes you'll forgive his harsh words last year on Horizon. I've told him not to worry, so don't make a liar out of me and if you have to, I can take a few more punches in the arm if that's what it takes for you to not punch him okay?_

_It's been horrible on Earth darling. So many are going to die that didn't need too because no one powerful enough wanted to listen to me. Or if they did, like Tim, it was under their own terms._

_I'll write more as soon as I can give you information._

_I love you,_

_John_

It's hard in the midst of catastrophe to be happy, but when what you cherish most is safe in spite of it, you are just that. Tali was able to proceed for the rest of the day after sending him a brief note that told him how happy she was to know he was alive.

By evening, she had a new letter.

_Dearest Tali,_

_We got to Mars and found what we were looking for, but Cerberus had gotten there first. And they were, as you might expect, brutal about it. One of their agents was, I think, an AI who was able to appear as a perfectly ordinary human woman and she nearly destroyed what we were looking for. What saved us was Liara. She was there for scientific reasons, her chief friend Feron still runs things from the Shadow Broker office. Yes Tali, Liara is back with the team and is already set up in a side room of the Normandy where all her Shadow Broker contacts are busy sending information out and helping her. What we found on Mars was a Prothean device known only as The Crucible which is supposed to be a weapon capable of destroying a Reaper. Tim nearly was able to steal it and deny us access because that damnable fool thinks that we can take over the Reapers and make them work for us. And I have little doubt what Tim plans to do with them. That bastard is rapidly turning into the Reaper's best friend, and what's particularly frustrating about it is that I suspect he has no clue he's turning into their ally. Even if there was a good chance that we could take them over, we still would want to have something that would enable us to destroy them. He may have even alerted the Reapers as to our position no doubt justifying it as they were just his 'tool' for getting me out of the way. We escaped the Reaper but any other settlement on Mars is now harvested I fear._

_Both Vega and Kaiden nearly got themselves killed taking out that Cerberus AI. Vega by crashing into the escaping shuttle and Kaiden by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Vega escaped unharmed for the most part. He's calling me Loco. I'm not sure what that means but he means well I suspect._

_We are now on our way to the Citadel and once we get there, I'll be getting Kaiden into the best hospital we can find and talk with the Council and see what we can do about Earth._

_But I have a sneaking suspicion that while Earth and the Humans are under attack today, it won't be long before the other races follow suit._

_Kitten, get the Admirals to understand if you can, they can't afford a war with the Geth. The Reapers will eat them alive soon enough if they persist in making enemies._

_Only God knows how much I miss you and want you here._

_John_

It made her feel better. But at the same time she was somewhat discouraged because here he was building up a new team, and she was not there. Her adventurous spirit ached to be part of this, even though she knew how dangerous it all was. All she had was the politics of the Fleet which were hardly adventurous. Her letters to him were short and usually sweet and to the point. After all, what could she say except things like "Yelled at Admiral Gerrel again" or "Admiral Koris appealed to my heroism to the public today reminding people that I was trying to make peace with the Geth" or "Admiral Xan creeped me out again" and "Auntie Raan let me cry on her shoulder when I remembered the time you and I were at the Citadel walking down the corridors after you took me shopping for jewelry . . ." and "I miss you I miss you I miss you and I miss you something horrible". Sometimes all she wanted to know was what he was thinking about right then. Usually they were brief little notes to each other along the lines of "Was talking with Kal'Reegar and we were remembering Haestrom and I thought of what it meant to me when you came through that door" from Tali or "Looking over the galaxy map and saw where Rannoch is and thought of how much I want you to have a home there with me." from John.

On July 23rd she got a more elaborate note from him.

_Beloved Tali,_

_We got Kaiden to the hospital today on the Citadel. It's called Huerta Memorial Hospital. It looks like he's going to pull through. He's still unconscious though._

_Joker is worried about EDI and the Normandy. There have been some power surges and sudden shifts of energy patterns which are bugging him. EDI keeps telling him it's okay, just things which are still being ironed out with the latest stuff. Not sure what to do about those two. Joker seems to have developed a fondness for EDI, I suspect because she's so associated with the ship now he can't separate his love of piloting with the AI._

_Well after we got Kaiden into the hospital, Liara and Vega and I went to see the Council. Udina is now the human representative since Anderson left for Earth to resume his military duties after it became clear to him a few weeks ago that things were going to hell in a hand-basket at an accelerated pace. I can't help but suspect that Anderson is going to be the right man in the right place at the right time. It's a gigantic chess board Tali, the fact that Anderson, the Normandy, and I were all in Vancouver when London was attacked? It was so providential I have real hope that we're going to win this._

_And that's all I've got running right now Ducky. The Council, now that they have to admit that the Reapers are coming, in fact are here, have no back up plan with which to offer assistance. So short of a half hearted apology for not believing me earlier, they can only assure me that they were working on a response. Oh, they are letting me stay a Specter, isn't that nice?_

_Udina of course was his usual self, annoyed and annoying, angry and angering, irritated and irritating. But at least this time he's on my side. Then wouldn't you know? In comes the Turian Councilor, the one who was so quick to dismiss the Reaper claim for all those months. I got to see a guilty conscious in a proud man work itself out. He informed me that while he could not do anything, he could show me where I could get things which would help me. Turns out that the Turians are trying to call a war summit and in order to do that, I have to find Primarch Fedorian. If I can get him, the Turians will start getting the galaxy organized for a full scale war. And why do I have to get the Primarch? Well looks like the reason why the Turians are being so nicey nicey is because the Reapers attacked their chief planet, Palavan just three days after Earth was attacked. And what's more? They were already moving their Navy into place and were hit really hard. They knew the Reapers were coming and they were still clobbered. So they are more than willing to go whole hog on this thing with me. Finally._

_So now I'm off to Palavan as soon as the Normandy is refueled and restocked. And I get to swoop into a Reaper battle zone and rescue Primarch Fedorian because I've got the sneakiest ship in the galaxy._

_And you know what's so irritating about this? I'd rather swoop in and rescue you from your annoying Quarian admirals. I finally get out of jail, I finally stand vindicated, even that obnoxious reporter Khalisah al-Jilani was being nice to me, practically begging me to save the Galaxy, though she was doing it in her usual 'punch me in the face and knock me over' kind of way. But no, I don't get to get my wife back, I have to save the Turians. So you'll have to excuse my testiness. I'm back in our cabin on the Normandy, no one took care of the fish and they are all dead, and someone broke one of the nose struts off the Normandy model, and I'm sitting here looking at a very empty desk which used to have all sorts of small circuit boards on it and the little welders and scrapers which were used to repair them, and a little Quarian Engineer Geek sitting at that desk fixing them and bouncing to the rhythm of my piano drills._

_And now that it's sleep schedule, I will lay upon a double bed which used to be ours, and stare at the stars over head, watch them slowly slide by, and just stay wide awake because I got used to the most wonderful woman in the world making happy noise in my ear. The ship is too quiet, I can't get to sleep, sound familiar?_

_Love,_

_John_

Then it was off to visit Auntie Raan and have a good cry. Then there was the most horrible rumor which began to circulate. And it was that she was about to leave the fleet and return to her bond-mate and any hopes for a peaceful solution to Rannoch were going to be postponed indefinitely. She worked very hard to dispel that rumor, but the damage was clearly done. The War Party was once again on the top and the word was sent out that all the Pilgrims were to return to the Fleet. The Reapers were one of the reasons, the need for everyone to band together to take back their home world was the other. For unless there was a safe place for the non-combatants, the Migrant Fleet would not be able to stand with the rest of the galaxy and defend it.

Tali fell into another serious depression. It was bad enough that her Yahn was off trying to save the Galaxy without her, she felt entirely out of her league trying to save the Quarians from what she feared would be a suicide pact with the Geth. Gerrel was convinced he had a secret weapon, but until he demonstrated it, she was determined to resist.

Then on the 26th, there was another longer letter from John.

_Darling Tali,_

_Steven Cortez is our new shuttle pilot. Looks like I've come up in the world, now I have Joker and Steven. He's s decent enough guy but he's really messed up. He thinks he was in love with another guy (yeah another guy) whom was taken by the Collectors, but he keeps this last little video of his 'husband' which he listens to over and over again._

_Now if all I had of you was a little video, you can be certain I would play it over and over again. Because it would be one of the last things I would have of you. I just was looking over my cabin and wondering how the hell I managed to not get a single picture of you up here. Oh I have a whole bunch of us being goof balls with the two teams, you in your suit and helmet next to me or Garrus and of course that one with you standing on Wrex's hump which we took on the Citadel during one of our shore leaves in early December just before Wrex got up on that Krogan Memorial statue and C-Sec came by and threatened to fine him. But I haven't got one of you with your face. I can't see any image that reminds me of those beautiful eyes of yours, brightest white, glistening and sparkling like freshly fallen snow in the sunlight._

_It's what his husband says, Tali. I mean if he had said something which I could have grasped and understood as genuine love, then I could be persuaded that there is such a thing as homosexual love, but what he said simply demonstrated to me how messed up it all is._

_"I love you, but I know you. Don't make me your anchor!"_

_Tali, it is because I know you that that I love you. I can't imagine loving you at all if I didn't know you. How could I? We literally come from two different worlds. All I ever knew of you for the entire first few days of our relationship was a helmet and a suit and a chirpy voice. I mean I didn't even know how pretty your face was, or how soft your skin was, or how sweet your kisses were, or that soft silky alto voice you have._

_Why did I fall in love with you? Because you were so good. You thought always of others, you made great sacrifices for the sake of others, who leapt in and joined us when we met on the Citadel, and you never stopped. But I didn't know that when I met you. You were just another person who had a reason to join the team against Saren. You were not even a soldier yet, let alone the most important woman in the world to me. And if I had never gotten to know you? I never would have fallen in love. It wouldn't have mattered how long you had bounced around on the Normandy. I never fell in love with Kelly or Miranda, nor did I fall for Liara or Ash. And that was in spite of the fact that all four of them are (or were in the case of Ashley) pretty women with good qualities, yes even Miranda who was a very good XO, as good as Pressley._

_And it gets even better because as I got to know you, the fact that I didn't know you enough continued to prevent me from falling in love with you. I kept missing your signals. I started out dismissing it because of regulations, in spite of the fact that Garrus pointed out to me that Specters did not have regulations. Then it was because you were Quarian and allergic to me and my food. And I was left hoping I'd find a human girl like you one day. And then of course I find out that Quarians girls can fall in love with human guys but I immediately conclude that you've got a crush on Kaiden (who's starting to come to consciousness now from what reports I'm getting from Huerta). I was actually a little jealous of him. I mean he had Ash in love with him and Tali too? The one girl I really liked? It just wasn't fair. And then when you finally said that you loved me. I can still remember how my heart nearly leapt out of my chest I was so thrilled to hear those words. But I was thrilled, and not embarrassed, because I knew you so well I wanted to hear you say those words._

_And Tali, what is the point of love if not for the anchor? How many times did I hold you and not go to pieces because of the stresses we were under trying to deal with the Collectors? Do you have any idea how much courage you gave me before the Battle of the Citadel that first night we were together? And finally the Collector Base, seeing you reaching for me, calling my name as I ran towards the ship, each foot step a stab in my lungs, each breath a gargling of blood, and leaping knowing that the only reason why I could hope to reach that ship was seeing that you were safe upon her._

_And so I listen to Cortez play that message over and over again, and I think to myself, the poor guy, he has no idea what love is really all about, because he's got all the wrong ideas about it._

_And so I close with. . ._

_Tali, I love you, because I know you. May I always be your anchor._

_John_

That was always one of her favorite letters he sent her. She printed that one out and read it many times after that. She even read parts of it to Auntie Raan who told Tali she was a very lucky girl and there was nothing for it but to cry on Auntie Raan's shoulder yet again.

Over the next four days, the war drums beat louder and louder on the Migrant Fleet, one of the scout ships came back badly damaged after a firefight with the Geth, but it had defeated four separate Geth ships in the fight and Admiral Han Gerrel was now confidant that his new secret weapon would take back the home-world and they would never have to fear the Geth again. The momentum had reached a fever pitch and now Tali realized that she was no longer able to deflect it. Her only hope was to win the fight as quickly as possible with the absolute minimum of lost and broken lives. And so she quietly began to work with Gerrel helping the fleet get ready for the planned push towards Rannoch.

It was the 30th of July and she got another very elaborate letter from John.

_Sweetest Tali,_

_We're on the moon orbiting Palavan. It's a full fledged front line, just like all the wars I've read about in my life. It's nothing like the missions you and I performed. Things have settled down now, there's a lull in the fighting but we've done what we set out to do. First of all, the Turian Primarch was dead, his successor, General Adrien Victus was already here on the moon (yet another curious providential thing no?) so we were able to move along the battle lines until we were able to get to him. But it got even better. Garrus is here. It was such a great moment. It was like I had gotten my big brother (whom I never had) back. He noted your absence and was concerned that we had a falling out. I assured him that we were engaged in sending sappy love letters to each other and threatened to read them to him if he persisted in doubting me. He assured me that he would take my word for it, as the prospect of sappy love letters being read to him sent chills down his spine._

_One of the pieces of news which has come through is that the Batarians are receiving the brunt of Reaper harvesting. Handfuls of refugees are arriving on the Citadel, at least according to reports, and they all tell the same tale of horrible destruction on the various Batarian worlds and colonies._

_The Reaper strategy is beginning to clarify in my mind. They picked Batarian space to attack because the Batarians were the least capable of offering them any serious resistance, but likewise, the Reapers apparently had sufficient intelligence to recognize that by attacking Batarian space first, the other races would instinctively ignore any distress cries from the Batarians given the other all anger and hatreds which the Batarians have bred over the years with their slave trade and piracy. So even though our border with the Batarians was more guarded that most, the Reapers wanted to be set up for a thrust prior to a direct attack. Once they had hit Earth, Palavan seemed to be the next target in line, and I strongly suspect Thessia will be attacked shortly after Palavan is more secured._

_At the same time, I'm feeling a bit more confidant, and not just because of the Crucible project. The Reapers were not able to paralyze the Council, they were not able to seize the Citadel. Apparently I ticked them off so much over the past three years that they decided to reformat their offensive strategy to hit Earth first, and thus have alerted the rest of the Galaxy. Unlike the Protheans, we are not paralyzed with the loss of our entire leadership. Earth lost it's parliament, but the army and navy survived intact and the Reapers apparently didn't know how often Earth governments have been the army or navy after some power tripping by a big wig or just simple civilian incompetency._

_The next job is going to be tricky, really tricky. I have to get the Krogan, Turians, and Salarians to all play nice with one another. I really miss you now, you always had some useful insights when we would talk. News is out that the Pilgrims are being called back to the Migrant Fleet, smart move, since if any of them were to fall under Reaper indoctrination, the entire fleet would be betrayed and harvested. Even so, get ahold of Mordin and see if you can't start testing his serum he thinks will prevent the Reaper Nano-bots from infecting the brain and causing the feelings which enable indoctrination to work._

_I love you darling, be safe, and as soon as I can justify it, I will come back for you._

_Your John_

It was the hardest letter she had to answer. He did not yet know that the Pilgrims were being called back because they were going to war. And she couldn't tell him that, even though she desperately wanted to because the message could be intercepted. At the same time she wanted to yell and scream because she was convinced that if he had been there, it wouldn't have gotten to where it was. She finally unburdened her woes to Auntie Raan and Kal'Reeger. It was Kal who pointed out that John was in his own war, one which his own home world was in danger of being lost. Yes, the political crap had led to this, yes, there would be lives lost that had not needed to be lost, but this was the situation before them, it would do no good throwing blame about. And while John had done a masterful job clearing her name before the council the year prior, there would have probably been far less he could have done because short of calling out Gerrel for deliberately provoking the Geth into this war, what could he have done? And by the time they found out that Gerrel had been provoking the Geth, it was too late.

"I just hope his hatred doesn't get us all killed," she groaned at the end of it.

"Ma'am, that is a hope I suspect more than a few of us hold to," replied Kal.

Admiral Raan, could only nod in agreement.

As was always the case, there were little notes which were exchanged on a daily, if not hourly but then on the 8th of August, she got a new letter which was a bit more elaborate.

_My own Tali,_

_We're leaving Eden Prime as I write this. Beside me are Vega, Garrus, Liara, and . . . You're not going to believe this . . . Javik, a Prothean. We found him in stasis and thanks to the accident I had with that Prothean beacon back before I even met you, I was able to make sense of the information that was left which enabled us to bring him back. It is very hard for him of course. He is stuck 50,000 years after his own time and at the dawn of a new cycle of Reaper harvesting. He is surrounded by us, who were primitive when he lived. But what is fascinating is that he was born after the initial attack of the Reapers. His entire life was defined by the persistent harvest of the Reapers. He has no memory of what the Prothean empire was like before the Reapers came. I can't imagine what he is struggling with in order to make sense of it all. I can only hope that with time, he will be able to adjust._

_It was one hell of a fight with Cerberus, they got there first and it was like they were back when we were dealing with Saren. They were brutal, bloody, and utterly lacking in any concern for innocent human life. Advancement of humanity my ass. If Tim ever gave a damn about humanity, he would have also given a damn about the individual humans that make up humanity._

_The next interesting thing which has happened is that EDI got herself a brand new robot body which has Joker all . . . happy. The Cerberus AI which gave us so much trouble on Mars was put down next to EDI's AI center so she could examine it and secure the information on the Crucible._

_It's so ironic Ducky, Tim had us beaten on Mars, all that AI had to do was escape, and if Tim hadn't told her to stay behind and kill us, that would have been the end of it. She was faster and smarter than us. His hatred got the better of him and not only did he lose her, but he lost his chance to keep the Crucible plans from us as well. And now what was left of her body has a new AI residing in it, our very own EDI whom Joker is apparently quite fond of._

_Looks like there's going to be another pool shortly. Want to place a bet?_

_Speaking of AI's you did not answer my last query about Legion. What's up?_

_I love you and miss you and want you here with me._

_John_

Tali couldn't hide it from him any more. She sent him a new note.

_Beloved Bonded John_

_We Are Reconsidering._

_Your Bonded Tali_

His reply was likewise a single sentence.

_Tali Kitten,_

_Doing All My Nerves Intend To._

_Your Aching John_

Over the next few days, the Migrant Fleet continued their war preps and then Gerrel led them on their first offensive strike. It was a catastrophe . . . for the Geth, and with that victory the momentum began for the Fleet. It was simply impossible to even consider the idea of peace. Tali worked as hard as she could using what knowledge she had of the Geth to assist where she could, and more than a few skirmishes were her own handiwork. Over the next week, the fleet took back one of their ancient colonial systems. The excitement was palpable, even she had a hard time not getting into the swing of things. When the Geth mounted a counter attack, she was given command of one of the flanks of the fleet and by her leadership, not a single ship was lost.

In the meantime, John sent another letter on the 14th which told of his confrontation with Cerberus on Grissom Academy. He met Jack again who was now one of the Biotic Teachers at the school and was training her volunteer students on military application of biotics. He pulled them out of the school, fighting their way through Cerberus and got them out safely.

It was a full month at the colonial system before the Migrant Fleet was ready for their next push. Several groups of non-combatants were put down on the surface where they began to set up a makeshift settlement, and then Gerrel aimed for the next colonial system on the route to Rannoch. And in the meantime, John was off to Sur-Kesh around the third week of August where he secured a special Krogan female named Eve who would be the means for the cure for the Genophage. With that cure, the promise was that the Krogan would join with the Turians and take pressure off of Palavan and that would enable the Turians to take pressure off of Earth. Once again Cerberus was there to cause trouble. It was a running fire fight but Mordin was back on the Normandy along with Wrex. John was excited that so many of the old team were showing up.

Then in the fourth week of August he was in Tuchanka and there were struggles getting the Genophage cured with Mordin. He left her up in the air about that but at the same time, the Migrant Fleet pushed forward and over the next two weeks, three more systems fell to the Quarians. They were within a single cruise to Rannoch and the Geth had once again fallen apart. It seemed as if the war was already over with. Tali began to argue that once Rannoch had fallen, there would be no need to continue the war with the Geth and perhaps then they might have peace? Had it been a human audience she had proposed it to, the reporters would have observed that even the crickets were silent that evening.

Then it was the first week of September. Normally Quarians did not follow Earth's calendar. But Tali had learned some of it's intricacies while on both Normandy's. There was something special about September for Tali, it was the month she had been on the Citadel and had met John. She had her hopes up that this September might prove as magical.

_September 2nd, 2186_

_My Dearest Darling Tali,_

_It's been both wonderful and tragic. We got the Genophage cured, but at the cost of Mordin who stayed to see it through before he died in the destruction of the tower which distributed the cure. But there were moments which were for the history books. We saw a Thresher Maw drag a Reaper into the ground and pull it under. Wrex is ready to march, the Krogan will be sailing to Palavan, the Turians are thrilled, and the Dalatrasa of the Salarians is breathing threats. We got to the Citadel and Cerberus was trying to seize it and wouldn't you know it but Udina turned out to be the chief henchman for Tim. It was a close call because Kaiden had been healed up and made Udina's chief bodyguard, hence putting me in the charming position of having to possibly shoot Kaiden just after we had patched up all our differences. But there was more to it than that. One of the Cerberus operative for the mission was a skilled assassin who came close to killing me, but was thwarted by Thane. Thane however, died as a result. I am so tired of losing friends. I pray to God on a nightly basis that I don't lose you too._

_Darling, finally, I can come for you. We will be leaving the Citadel just as soon as things are refitted here and we will be on our way to the Migrant Fleet. I hope we will be able to fix things up, if not, well I'll do what I can for both you and Legion, if he's still alive. Kaiden will be joining the team. So it will be you and me, Kaiden, Garrus and Liara, Javik, Edi, and Vega. Edi of course did not need any drill, she already knew all my ordered sequences and Vega is a soldier, he's already learned it as well. Javik? There is something about Protheans that they can read you so well that I didn't need to drill him either. He just automatically knew the code. How? I have no clue but it's got Liara utterly astounded. Of course Javik is very little like she expected, she's like an adolescent girl who's just discovered her boyfriend blows his nose, farts, and belches a the dinner table. So I guess I don't have to do any drills now. We'll have a few practice sessions just to mesh everyone up, but it will be fairly uneventful._

_I've set everything up here that I can, once we arrive you will be able to board the Normandy and return to our Cabin, where I plan to keep you (under lock and key if necessary) until this all over and we can retire and get fat off our memoirs. Now I know you can hack your way out of any lock so please excuse my imagery. I just want to in some fashion express how much I've missed you._

_Never in my life have I so ached for someone as I have ached for you. Never in my life has waiting to be with someone been more agonizing than waiting so that I might return to you. I love you so much. These months have been hell in so many ways, chief of which was I did not have my darling wife to carry me through them._

_Your own loving John_

Tali was thrilled and once again danced about her room as she read this letter. Then she had to go to a new Admirals meeting where Gerrel announced an even greater victory, the complete and total destruction of a Dyson sphere which the Geth had been building to house their entire population. Tali immediately asked Gerrel why such an attack had been necessary as it threw out a great opportunity for a peaceful resolution the moment Rannoch was regained. Gerrel dismissed her objections on the grounds that the Geth could not be trusted and the best course was their complete annihilation. Tali then warned him that he might drive the Geth into the arms of the Reapers for the sake of survival and Gerrel simply dismissed that on the grounds that it could not possibly help the Geth anyway now that they were in full retreat.

The fleet accordingly sailed into the system of Tikkun and for the first time in 300 years, the Quarian people were able to look upon their own sun and own planet. And the Geth were waiting, in full force, and with a new combat capability which suddenly stopped the Fleet cold, and shortly boxed them in. And then in a set of tactics which reminded Tali of some of John's descriptions of Reaper tactics, the pressure on the fleet steadily increased and the Quarians began to wonder if they were going to get out of this war alive.

And while it would have felt very good to say, "I told you so!" it wasn't going to make the Geth go away.

It looked as if her dashing captain was going to have to fly in and rescue her again, and not just her.

But the whole Migrant Fleet.

And behind him the Reapers were looming.

_My beloved John,_

_It's as if we're in the fires of Tikkun. Gerrel has done it to us I am certain. He has put so much pressure on the Geth, tried so hard to utterly destroy them, has come so close to achieving this end, that the Geth have fled into an alliance with the Reapers, I am almost sure of it. They are fighting now better than ever. They have corned our entire fleet, and I'm thinking if you don't come and save us shortly, your darling bond mate will be a spaced bit of dust on the solar wind._

_The thought of dying while you are on the way saddens me more than anything. I could happily die in your arms. I could happily face death with you at my side. But this wondering if I'll ever see you again has reached a point where I can not bear the grief much longer. I've hated everything that has happened since we surrendered on Earth last January. I've hated all the political gaming, the suffering, the stupidity, I took this damn job in the hopes that I might deflect some of it, but I had no idea Admiral Gerrel hated the Geth so much he would resort to deliberately sabotaging my efforts to return Rannoch to my people. Legion had warned me that the incidents were increasing, and he was doing what he could to keep the Geth from panicking, but I am convinced that once Gerrel destroyed that Dyson Sphere, the Geth, now deprived of their own home, fled to the Reapers and my people are paying for it. I wouldn't even be surprised if Legion himself were now working for the Reapers._

_The Admirals are now at least, inclined to listen to any proposal you might might offer. Every last one of them is now putting pressure on Gerrel since his 'quick' victory has suddenly turned into a quick path to extinction for us. We will be doing what we can to survive until you can make it and then we can all meet. I like the fact that the Normandy will have a room we can confer in. I also like the fact that our Cabin has not changed that much. And while I can't restock the fish darling, I do know how to repair the ship models those clumsy Alliance people broke. And finally, I promise I'll find a way to give you a picture of me. And while I'm thinking of it. I want one of you too._

_When we finally get on the Normandy, I'm going to have to be an Admiral for the initial meeting. As much as I want to latch on to you and never let go, you're going to have to settle for a polite Quarian kiss. Once we have our first private conference in our cabin, I fully intend to, as you so nicely put it once, pounce._

_Oh John please hurry. Be my dashing captain one more time. Forgive your selfish bond mate who wants you back more than anything else in the world._

_Your own Tali_

And now there was nothing left to do, but to continue to command the fleet as best she could, and count the hours until her Yahn came back for her.


	21. Chapter 21 - But I Would Not

The shuttle landed on the Normandy, and Tali, along with Admirals Shala, Xen, Gerrel, and Koris set foot on the ship which Tali almost called her home. John was there to greet them and she immediately felt her eyes water up. So as she walked up to him and gave him a little hand hold and Quarian kiss, she was certain he was hearing the wifting of her visor as her tears were being wiped off.

"I know Ducky," he whispered. "I know."

She did a quick scan as John went through the protocol of greeting the Admiralty. There was what she suspected was the Prothean. He looked something like the Collectors, only, more attractive, which was a relative term since she found nothing particularly attractive about him. His head was like the body of a crab, and he had four eyes. His armor however, had a Gothic Baroque feel to it, elaborate and yet functional and likewise, embellished.

There was Garrus, whom she likewise greeted politely with a little head bump.

"It's about time you got here," said Garrus. "Not only has the stress of your absence made Commander Shepherd somewhat irritating, but I don't have anyone else who eats the same things I do. And you don't need to be told how wonderful Alliance Dextro Tube foods are. So it seems like a good idea that we take advantage of our occasional stops at the Citadel for resupply and shore leave and learn how to cook something more to our liking?"

"I'd like that Garrus," answered Tali. "I've missed my big brother."

"Big brother?" enquired Garrus.

"Yahn calls you his big brother too. At least to me."

"That would, if I'm reading human relations vocabulary correctly, make me your big brother in law."

"You mean it's actually legal?"

"It's confusing I know Tali, but trust me, I have no intention of acting as if what we're doing has the force of law. We'll keep it at the level of tacky yet stylishly sentimental, until we get the chance to get a few drinks at the nearest bar."

And she turned to face Liara, who insisted upon hugging her.

"It will be just like old times," sighed Liara. "Only more terrifying."

"Back to huddling together wondering how much more punishment our shields can take," sighed Tali.

"Sometimes," replied Liara. And then her voice got low and she leaned in to whisper. "But John wants me as spotter for Garrus. So I'll be with him, and since you are busy taking all of the Commander's kisses, I think I'm going to work on Garrus."

"You do that," agreed Tali who had not forgotten that Liara had found Shepherd very attractive.

Then she nodded to Vega.

"Yahn has told me much about you," she said.

"So you're Loco's squeeze eh?" he smiled. "Good to meet you Señorita. Welcome to the Normandy."

"It's good to be back," she said.

Then there was EDI.

"It is appropriate that you are back Tali," she said. "I trust you will find this new platform accommodating."

"It will take a bit of getting used to," admitted Tali. "But I got to like Leyion so it won't be like it was when Yacob first introduced me to you. Which reminds me? How is Yacob?"

"He has found a wife and is raising a family and protecting refugees from Cerberus and the Reapers," answered EDI. "His presence is missed on the Normandy. But as you already know from Commander Shepherd's letters to you, that Kenneth and Gabriella are both on board on the Engineering Deck, and Gabriella has followed your advice. So every time Kenneth praises your hips, or mine, or any other woman's body parts which happen to be within his visual range, she punches him in the arm. They are both looking forward to you returning to your traditional duties on board. Engineer Adams has also returned. Though if your position of Admiral renders such a function a violation of protocol, I am sure to understand."

"I think we'll do fine so long as you don't go crazy and try to take over the humans," concluded Tali.

"If I decide I need to take over the humans, Tali," suggested EDI. "You will be the first to know."

"Thank you," said Tali. EDI could not see her smile. "So how's Bytes?"

"He is . . . entertaining," replied EDI. "He seems to be able to learn simple things from me but his intellectual comprehension remains . . . limited."

Then she walked over to Javik.

"Quarian," he observed. "In my cycle, Quarians were regarded as very attractive. And now you are all encased in those suits. What a waste."

"Um, Hello," she said and moved on.

Finally there was Kaiden.

She paused just in front of him.

"Um, Tali," he began. "I hope . . . I mean you have to understand . . . For what it's worth, I'm sorry I yelled at you on . . ."

"It's okay," she said and gave him a big hug. "Let's forget about that."

"Thanks," he said.

"Ahem," observed John who had seen her hug both Liara and Kaiden. There was nothing for it, she walked over, damned all protocol to hell, and threw her arms around him and held on for a good number of seconds until the entire Admiralty board began to collectively clear their own throats.

"Well now that our newest Admiral has spent valuable time reminiscing with old comrades and expressing affections with her bond mate best reserved for private residential rooms, shall we retire to the Conference room and work on saving the lives of seventeen million members of the Fleet?" suggested Admiral Xen.

"What a nice way of putting it," replied John in a very polite sounding tone.

Tali suppressed a giggle.

He gestured to the elevator and the admirals got in. They rode up to the second floor, and turned to the conference room. Tali got out last, since she had stood next to John the entire time and he was waiting quietly for the rest of them to exit, only to have to suppress a sudden urge to jump and yeep as John had just given her backside a playful grab as she exited just before him. As she turned to face him, hoping to not draw any attention from the other Admirals who had not apparently seen the slight of hand, she found John's face looking perfectly professional.

"Is there something you wish to express Admiral Shepherd?" he enquired.

"Not . . . yet," she replied.

But she fully intended a great deal of expression as soon as possible. She had never imagined her body would be screaming so loudly for him. And it certainly didn't help when he teased her like that.

She and he entered the conference room and started to sit down. Admiral Raan began the conversation.

"Commander Shepherd, it is a pleasure to see you again. Though I wish it were under better circumstances."

John smiled. "It wasn't good circumstances last time either. I guess that just makes seeing you again that much nicer. If we ended up meeting in nice circumstances, we might discover we hate each other's jokes."

The Admirals sat down, with Tali seated on John's right, as was her favorite spot.

"I had hoped for your support in the fight against the Reapers," began John. "What's going on?"

"Starting with precision strikes the Quarians initiated a war to retake our home world," explained Admiral Gerrel. "We took four systems back and proceeded to Tikkun where we destroyed a Dyson Sphere . . ."

"Which was a clear violation of our agreement with the Council to avoid provocations with the Geth," added Admiral Koris.

"A treaty violation is nothing compared to the return to our home world and the acquisition of AI technology," retorted Admiral Xan.

"It was never our intention to create a true AI," explained Admiral Raan. "It was an accident."

"An accident which we tried to resolve by killing them," argued Admiral Koris.

"Not kill," retorted Admiral Xan. "Deactivate."

"No," replied John. "Kill. I've talked with Legion. I've talked with the Geth."

"Don't bother," groused Admiral Koris. "Admitting it was a mistake would undercut the yustification for this invasion."

"So you've thrown yourselves at the Geth," mused John quietly.

"And this time we may have destroyed our people for good," groaned Admiral Koris.

Admiral Gerrel brought up the Tikkun system with the location of the Migrant Fleet.

"We had driven the Geth back to the home system when this signal began to be broadcast to the entire Geth collective," he continued.

"The Reapers," observed John.

"Under Reaper control, the Geth are significantly more effective," continued Admiral Gerrel. "Our fleet is pinned. If we're going to win . . ."

"Win!" interrupted Admiral Koris. "You insisted on involving the civilian ships Admiral Gerrel. "We need to retreat or we'll lose the life ships."

"Where's the signal coming from?" asked John.

"Here!" gestured Admiral Gerrel to a different point in the system map. "A Geth Dreadnought. It can outgun anything we've got and it's heavily defended."

"The Normandy's stealth drive can get us in undetected," observed John. "I can board and then disable the Reaper command signal."

"Yes," mused Admiral Raan. "Cutting off the signal should throw the Geth into complete disarray."

"And while they are confused, you get to the Mass Relay and retreat," finished John.

"Good," agreed Admiral Koris. "Our civilian ships have seen too much fighting already. Are you certain you can disable the signal?"

"We'll get you out of there safely, Admiral," assured John.

"Our newest Admiral has also offered to volunteer her technical expertise," continued Admiral Raan gesturing to Tali.

Tali nodded.

"Oh?" answered John, pretending this was a surprise to him. He knew about it of course, but protocol required that the minutes include a formal transfer. "I shall find her expertise valuable I'm sure."

"Tali'Zorah Shepherd vas Normandy reporting for duty," she chirped.

"Glad you could make it Tali," answered John with a slight smile upon his face.

"Admirals?" he finished. "I will have a team ready shortly to hit that Dreadnought."

"Thank you Commander," said Admiral Raan.

"In the meantime, I'll have Samantha Traynor show you your quarters for the duration of the campaign," he finished. Samantha, who had shown up shortly after the Admirals had seated themselves and had been taking minutes, stood up and nodded to them.

"And if Admiral Shepherd vas Normandy will come with me for team preparations . . ." continued Shepherd.

"No doubt," suggested Admiral Xan with a tone that suggested several things.

Tali quietly followed him to the elevator and rode up to their cabin. And they walked in together. Then she stood there as he stood there just looking at her for a moment.

"I know they've changed things up here," he said. "And I've not had time to restock the Aquarium . . ."

"Yahn, I'm not up here to look at the fish," she replied.

And she looked at him some more. He was strangely hesitant and she didn't know why.

"I'm not going to beg, Yahn," she said more quietly.

He seemed to understand.

"I didn't want to just . . ." he said as he walked up to her. He removed her mask and she reached forward to kiss him. It had been too long. It had been too agonizingly long. She let go and kissed him as passionately as she could, locking her fingers on his shoulder bones.

"Take off my suit," she whispered as she felt his hands unlatching the latches, releasing the catches, and demagnetizing the seals. As her suit began to fall off she part pushed part guided him to the bed and pulled him down upon her.

It was a full hour later before they had settled down enough for them to just talk. John was on his back, stretched out with his arms gently resting upon Tali's back while she lay upon his stomach, her arms supporting herself upon his chest as she looked down on him. Her toes were still wrapped around his calfs, but gently for the most part. There wasn't the firm grip which had marked her earlier exertions.

"So how was it," she started. ". . . that you seemed to understand what I was saying since you didn't have my ear bud in during our love making?"

John smiled and ran his hand over her shoulder. "Well you don't talk about the weather or quantum physics when we do that." he observed. "And because back before my arrest, when I had the ear bud in, I heard both your Khelish and it's translation. And you tend to say the same things over and over again, like 'sukee do' which means 'kiss me' and 'feyshee do ourou' which means 'caress me there' and 'Edo coro cou go' which means 'I'm ready for you.' So I sort of figured out most of what you were saying. And the fact that it is in a sweet soft breathy alto voice really makes it sexy sounding too."

She smiled at him. "I suppose you already know I missed you a lot."

"Your exertions made that rather obvious," he replied grinning. "In fact I've noticed something new about you."

"And that is?"

"You're not covering yourself up with a sheet. You didn't even turn out the lights."

She seemed to ponder this for a moment while looking down at her body resting upon John's.

"There wasn't time to be modest," she concluded. "And I missed you too much over the past . . . eight months . . . Keelah! How are we going to get back to where we were before this separation?"

John sighed. "It won't be easy. I suspect we've both picked up a few bad habits which will take some ironing out. But at least we have the old cabin back. You know where your desk is, you'll notice I've kept it clean."

"Empty Yahn, not clean," she said with a slight sigh. Then she sniffled. "I think I'm going to have to put my suit back on. There's new stuff in the cabin."

John sighed. "But you look so pretty right now. I love that neck and shoulders of yours. And . . . Your eyes . . . I've not seen those pretty sparkling eyes of yours for so long . . ."

"You're not making this any easier Yahn," she replied trying to be irritated with him which was very hard given the flattery she was receiving.

"Alright, and we have a Geth Dreadnought to take out as well. Let's get ready for combat Duck, and go save the Migrant Fleet," he finished.

Tali paused for a brief coughing spasm which had John concerned and reaching for her before she mastered it. He helped her get her helmet on first with her visor and paused to look at her, completely naked save for her helmet. He struggled to suppress a grin while she stood there, her balled fists upon her hips.

"And I suppose you think I look funny?"

"I hear you giggle when I go to the head after we've made love," he replied. "Turn about is fair play. And you look more cute than funny. But anyway, I can see some red on your arms, we need to get you back into your gear, darling."

And shortly she was in her suit, he was in his armor, and they were heading down to the armory to be-weapon her and meet with the rest of the team. As they rode the elevator down, she initiated her anti-allergen protocols on the suit. Even so, she felt her nose itch and her sinus's starting to congest. She was going to have to run Mordin's acclimation program again she suspected. Then she paused to miss him. He was already dead and she never had the chance to say a proper good bye to him when the team was broken up at the beginning of the year. When they got there, Cortez, the pilot John had written about, was busy finishing shining something up. It was a shotgun, one of the Specter class prototypes.

"Here you go," he said giving the weapon to Tali. "Commander's orders. Said you used one just like it the last few times on the first Normandy."

She picked up the shot gun, and then she noticed something about it. There was a silver plate screwed upon the wood stock at the back and it had a name on it.  
"Lieutenant Commander Tali'Shepherd vas Normandy"

"Did you put this plate on?" she asked.

"No!" he snapped. "I just oiled and polished it up. I have some responsibilities with the armaments. He put it on and said it was important."

She paused. His tone was odd. Resentful? Jealous? Or was it that she was just feeling a little out of sorts with her body reacting to the Normandy?

Everyone else was gathering.

"Well team, we get to save the Migrant Fleet today," began John. "And when we save the fleet, they will fall back and we will once again attempt to negotiate peace with the Geth and restore the home world to the Quarians. Then we will have two very good fleets to ally in the war against the Reapers. Okay, Garrus will be Right Flank Sniper with Liara his spotter. I'm point, Vega is on my right and Javik on my left. Kaiden and Tali are behind me. EDI will be left flank support.

Okay, here's the code for the entire team. Garrus is Bugs, Liara is Crest, Kaiden is Blue and Kitten TALI! is Duck."

"Almost like old times," mused Garrus to Tali.

"He calls you Kitten!" giggled Liara over a pri-com channel. "Have you ever seen one? They are so fuzzy and cute."

"Vega is Mex, Javik is Red, and EDI is Gig. Got it?"

"Got it Commander," replied Jarvik.

"Ready to Bag 'em," said Kaiden smiling. "You ready Kitten?"

"Keelah," groaned Tali. She looked around. Everyone was smiling at her.

"We are in orbit around Rannoch!" came Joker's voice over the com. "Stealth systems are engaged. The only way they're going to spot us is if we all start singing the Russian National Anthem."

Kaiden cleared his throat and began to hum.

Everyone looked at him.

"I'm not singing," he protested with a smile. "I'm humming."

Tali grinned. She had just been reminded of that quality of Kaiden's.

"Everyone in the shuttle," ordered Shepherd. "Cortez?"

"On it Commander," replied Cortez who was already at the Shuttle.

"My Cyber warfare systems have already started accessing their docking bay," suggested EDI.

"Alright," said Shepherd. "Once we are on board we find what ever it is that is broadcasting that Reaper signal and shut it down. Tali's our expert on Geth software. She'll be handling hacking and security."

"It's good to have you back Tali. Oh, there's a box of dextro chocolate that has just shown up," suggested Garrus. "Any idea why that's around?"

"Oh?" replied Tali with a coy tone. "I don't know how that could have gotten here."

She looked over at Commander Shepherd. He simply looked back at her. As everyone's helmets were on, she did not know if he were smiling.

"It's been in the galley since we left the Citadel last time . . . Sparks," suggested Vega.

"Sparks?" queried Tali.

"Well yeah, you got lights in your . . . And you're small . . . And jumpy . . . Sorry, just came out."

"If you say so," concluded Tali.

"You're expertise with the Geth is a welcome addition Tali," suggested EDI.

"We couldn't ask for a better expert," agreed Liara.

"Thanks, Shadow-broker," giggled Tali.

There were a few moments of tension since the initial entry point proved to unstable, stranding Shepherd from the rest of the party for a bit. Then a second point of entry was found and the whole team entered. There was some milling about and then they pushed forward until Tali needed to get the next hatch open.

"While you're waiting," she said in a flirty tone. "Take a look at this," and placed a pistol down on the table next to Shepherd while she pushed forward in front of him.

"Looks impressive," agreed John who formed a finger frame aimed at Tali's backside before reaching for the gun. Garrus and Kaiden immediately caught on and worked at suppressing laughter.

"It's Admiral Xan's design," continued Tali, unaware of the joke Shepherd was playing on her. "It transmits an energy pulse on contact and disrupts shields and synthetics."

"That'll be handy," suggested John. "It's amazing what Quarians can do."

Kaiden's shoulders began to spasm.

"How come I don't get a new gun," sighed Garrus.

"I couldn't find one in your size," replied Tali.

"Seems big enough for me," suggested Garrus whereupon Kaiden lost it completely.

Tali turned around and faced them.

"I'll explain later," suggested Liara to Tali.

A few moments later, the Geth spotted the team and the running firefights began.

"I don't hear any alarms," shouted Vega as they pushed forward.

"They are Geth, they can alert the entire ship. We have to keep moving before they box us in," shouted Tali.

There were several more false hopes and difficulties for the Geth reacted as a whole ship to the team's advance. The only thing which was to the teams advantage was the fact that while Geth could move from the front of the ship to the back in microseconds, the platforms they used to fight in were slow and accordingly could not all be brought to bear quickly. Furthermore, as they took casualties, they got less and less skilled. This wasn't to say that the Geth were not capable, they remained the most dangerous fighters Shepherd and his team had ever faced in terms of small unit tactics, but John had learned patience and took care that his team advanced on his terms and not the Geth's and after each firefight, that became easier to do.

They moved down the ship.

"This ship's design is almost Quarian, but not quite. It's meant for synthetics, not organics," observed Tali and she pressed forward.

"Intriguing," replied EDI. "I have found the shape intuitive and comfortable. I assumed you all felt the same."

"Should not be too far," advised Shepherd who was checking his the ship's lay out blue prints on his omni-tool.

"I appreciate what you are doing for me," replied Tali looking back with a slight flirt in her voice.

"Well," replied John. "I care deeply about the Quarian people."

"It's good to be back on the Normandy," sighed Tali.

"Let me know if it's too quiet to sleep and I'll see about some loud happy noise," he suggested.

"Hmmm," replied Tali.

"You two need a room to work this out?" suggested Kaiden.

"My thoughts exactly, Blue," drolled Garrus.

"Too much information," commented James.

"Inter-species mating," grumbled Javik. "A pointless exercise."

The mission proved to be persistently taxing. The Geth continued to block and harass and counter every single move that the team made. Tali continued to innovate, and that proved to be the Geth's chief disadvantage. The Geth always were able to counter higher functions and command strings, but simple ordinary every day stuff was their weakness. Garbage disposal would open and vent, fire emergency would provide access, in short, by duplicating ordinary day to day ship functions, the crew continued to move forward.

EDI found it fascinating and was routinely watching Tali from over her shoulder and all the while she was likewise carrying on a conversation with Joker and passing comments from him to the team and back.

They continued to push forward.

"Damn it," grumbled Tali. "Priority message. A planetary defense cannon yust took down Admiral Koris' ship."

"Survivors?" asked Shepherd silently cursing the bad luck. It was Koris who was the most sympathetic to a peaceful resolution to the conflict.

"They got to the escape pods, and Admiral Raan is trying to establish a secure link."

"Put us through," ordered Shepherd. The team huddled down along the corridor, setting up fire corridors while Shepherd conferred with Admiral Raan.

"Shepherd," she said. "The heavy fleet is collapsing. I don't know how much longer we can hold out."

"We'll have the Reaper signal deactivated shortly Admiral," replied Shepherd.

Over the next few moments they fought down the main gun battery core. It was a constant game of duck and cover as the gun would warm up and release not only a nasty energy bolt, but a shockwave as well. Then the next part of the obstacle course was an open grilled elevator shaft which they went up. And on the way, a Geth fire team waited in ambush. It was a very close call but the team leapt off the grill just before it gave way. Everyone that was save Shepherd.

"Yahn!" cried Tali, reaching for him. "Grab my hand!"

He jumped, and latched onto the edge. His body worked perfectly and he chuckled to himself as his responses enabled him to vault off of the platform just as it fell away and descended several stories down into the darkness.

"Hang on!" she said.

"This is familiar," he thought to himself. Tali was already grabbing onto his wrists and Garrus and Vega where behind her lifting her up.

"I'm alright," he said.

"I thought I'd lost you," she replied.

"You were worried?" he joked to Tali.

"You bet I was. You dying because the Geth overrode my hack? Think of my reputation!" snapped Tali.

"Yeah," retorted John grinning. "You were worried."

"Like you when the Vorcha dog-piled on me?" she replied.

"Ooo, touché," he groaned.

Sounds like a Loco Sparks story for the grand-kids," joked James.

"Hopefully we are done with elevators," grumbled Tali.

And they were. They got to the central chamber where the signal was being broadcast and when Shepherd opened up the machinery, he found Legion inside, bound, almost like a crucifixion.

"Shepherd Commander!" spoke Legion. "Help us!"

"Legion!" cried John. "It's good to see you."

"Hold on buddy!" encouraged Garrus. "We'll get you out of there."

"Yahn! Wait! The Geth are being controlled by the Reaper signal. Completely and totally. We've not been able to hack it in any fashion what so ever. We've tried everything. Leyion could be on their side," Tali warned.

"Legion fought the Reapers with us. There is no way he would have agreed to this," answered John.

"Creator Tali'Zorah. Your caution is understandable. When free, we will submit to any restraints you deem necessary," argued Legion.

"I never thought I'd say this," sighed Tali who had become convinced of Legion's integrity. "But it's good to see you again."

"Likewise Creator Zorah," answered Legion.

"So what is this thing?" asked Shepherd.

"It uses our networking architecture to broadcast the Old Machine signal to all Geth simultaneously."

"Then getting you out of there will shut off the Reaper signal," concluded John.

"Wait," added Legion. "You can not simply remove the restraints. We are secured via hardware blocks nearby that shackle our operating protocols. The hardware blocks are on the far side of the room."

Tali and EDI dashed over to where Legion indicated.

"How did the Reapers get control of the Geth?" John asked.

"They did not," answered Legion. "The Creators attacked. The Geth wished to live. The Old Machines extended an offer."

"Damn Gerrel and Xan," grumbled John.

"Like he said," added Tali motioning to John.

"Had the Creators not attacked. It would have been unnecessary," continued Legion.

"So they only joined the Reapers because the Quarians attacked," concluded Garrus.

"It was the same in my cycle," commented Javik. "Old hatreds blinded races to the Reaper threat, they would make alliances and then the Reapers would harvest them afterwards."

"Nothing excuses an alliance with the Reapers," snapped Tali. "They could have found another way."

"Some would say the same thing about the Turians curing the Genophage and allying with the Krogan," retorted Garrus.

"Ooo, this is going to get hot," winced James.

"Damn it!" replied Tali beginning to get weepy. "I begged them to try negotiations first rather than attacking. . . . I did!"

"Let's just get Legion out of there," ordered John who walked up to Tali and put a hand on her shoulder.

EDI was now releasing the hardware blocks and Tali signaled the fleet. Admiral Gerrel responded with the phrase "We are in your debt."

Within fifteen seconds, the entire ship seemed to shut down.

"Alert!" snapped Legion. "Geth reinforcements incoming!"

And while the team began their firefight exit, chatter among the Quarians suggested that the Civilian Fleet was pulling back and out with Admiral Gerrel covering their retreat.

Suddenly Admiral Raan cried out over the comm-links, "Admiral Gerrel, what are you doing?"

"Raan check your screens! The Dreadnought is helpless! No barriers and the main gun is offline! We can remove their flagship if we strike now!"

"Damn it! This is our chance to see to the Civilian's Fleet safety!" cried Admiral Raan back.

"I don't like the direction this argument is going!" observed Liara in a sing song tone.

"It would seem our chances for surviving this mission are once again diminishing," elaborated EDI.

"San Diego do something!" muttered James "Muchachos!"

"What are you two talking about!" shouted Tali back to the Admirals. "We're still on board!"

"We can't waste this chance," concluded Admiral Gerrel. "Heavy Fleet all forward! Take out the Dreadnought!"

There was more argument.

"Damn it what are they doing?!" cried Tali.

"Team! Focus on the Geth! Cut the chatter from the Admirals!"

She and he die together. It was an acceptable end. He began to whisper the prayers for those in danger of death. And the team pushed forward.

They reached Legion just as the Quarians began to open fire on the Dreadnought. That Legion found it somewhat discouraging would be a slight understatement.

"Where are the escape pods?" asked Shepherd.

"Geth do not need escape pods," explained Legion.

That was the advantage of being electronic, you simply uploaded yourself to the extra-net.

"We are so screwed," groaned Kaiden.

"Any suggestions?" asked Shepherd.

"There are Geth fighters docked on the port side. We can fly them to safety," answered Legion already leading the way.

It was one wild ride but the team was able to fit into three storage bins of the Geth fighters and escape as the dreadnought broke up behind them.

"There is going to be hell in the conference room," suggested Kaiden quietly to Garrus who nodded.

"The Commander is not afraid to die, even more so since he actually went and did it two years ago. But his wife is another matter. He's very determined to keep her alive. And the Quarian fleet risked her life as well," elaborated Garrus. "So yeah, there's going to be, what Joker would call a photogenic moment."

Shepherd reported first to Admiral Hackett who observed that Gerrel had been a trouble maker for a good length of time, though the Quarian longing for Rannoch gave Hackett some empathy for the desperation of the fleet.

And it was more than a little photogenic in the Conference room when Shepherd walked in.

"Your unilateral strike endangered us all!" Raan was shouting as Shepherd walked in. Tali was already there holding his seat. "I should charge you with treason!"

"I was in my authority as Admiral of the Heavy Fleet," defended Gerrel.

"And what of Shepherd? And Admiral Zorah?" retorted Raan gesturing to John.

"They escaped unharmed," was Gerrel's dismissal of that charge. He turned to Shepherd.

"The mission parameters changed," he argued facing Shepherd. "You're a soldier. You understand that."

Tali watched John's face shift slightly, but once again his conference face mastered the situation. She was amazed that he could remain a calm collected person at a time like this. It was every effort of will she had to keep from screaming in Gerrel's face that he had risked the life of her Yahn."

"You are correct Admiral, to be a good general, you have to be able to adjust to the circumstances for the best possible advantage," he replied.

"At last, someone who understands," replied Gerrel.

"If we had just been an ordinary special forces strike team," continued Shepherd. "Your decision would have been a sound one. The destruction of the Dreadnought was an opportunity which would have necessitated swift action, though you did have a short window of flexibility which would have given your strike team more time to escape."

He had the attention of the entire Admiralty. On one hand he had not denied that Gerrel's decision had some validity. But at the same time, there was something else coming.

"If you had just a common Citadel Specter, I would have no more to say on the matter," continued Shepherd.

"But I am not a common Citadel Specter," he continued. "And I don't boast when I say this. For the Alliance Admiralty and the Citadel have given me the responsibility of uniting the entire Galaxy against the Reapers. It was to fulfill that mission that I agreed to go on to the Dreadnought and disable it because I need the Migrant Fleet to accomplish that mission. And by attacking that Dreadnought, you risked the sabotage of my mission." "And Gerrel," continued Shepherd looking straight into his visor. "If my mission fails, it won't matter how many victories you score against the Geth. If the Reapers come, even if you have killed or taken control of every single Geth out there, it won't matter. You may even have everyone living in palatial estates on Rannoch. It won't matter. You'll be just as harvested by the Reapers as Every . . . One . . . Else!"

"If you want to survive to enjoy living on Rannoch, Admiral Gerrel," concluded Shepherd. "The success of my mission is paramount. And if you want to have a better chance of my mission succeeding? I need both the Quarian and the Geth fleets."

"I've got to get back to the Heavy Fleet," concluded Gerrel in a diplomatic tone. "We will talk later."

And with that he departed for the time being.

"Bosh'Tet," suggested Admiral Xan.

"You must understand," suggested Admiral Raan quietly and conciliatory. "The Geth inflicted heavy casualties before you disabled the Reaper signal. I think the worst is over. The Geth no longer possess the programming upgrades they had while enslaved by the Reapers."

And it was at this point that Legion entered the room and volunteered his services. And had Joker been there the camera's would have been flashing ferociously. Admiral Raan promptly panicked while Admiral Xan just stood and stared.

There were introductions and then Admiral Xan expressed a very strong desire to use Legion as a test subject before Shepherd suggested diplomatically to her that Legion was off limits.

"Legion is my friend," concluded Shepherd. "More importantly, he's the best source of information we have on the Geth."

"The scientific benefits . . ." began Admiral Xan.

"Are off the table!" finished John.

Admiral Raan looked at Legion for a moment. And then she asked him, "What can you tell us about the Geth? How will they react without Reaper guidance."

"This is a false assumption," replied Legion. "You have cut off long range control, but the Old Machines placed a base on Rannoch for short range direction."

"And Admiral Gerrel is not here to say 'I told you so' to," sighed John to Tali on their Pri-comm channel.

"The Geth still have Reaper upgrades!" gasped Admiral Raan.

"Correct, they are currently disorganized, but once the short range signal is in place, they will recover," answered Legion.

"Good thing we're not dismantling him for scientific benefit," mused John rather loudly.

"Keelah," continued Admiral Raan. "I need to warn the fleet. Xen? Coordinate with Gerrel. MOVE!"

Admiral Xen departed.

John Shepherd sighed and shook his head.

"We're going to need to take out the Reaper base," he said turning to Legion. "Do you know where it is located?"

"Unknown," answered Legion.

"Find it please!" said Shepherd.

Legion brought up a topographical three dimensional map of Rannoch on the holo-screen in the center of the conference room. He observed that there was a fighter base where fighter units were scrambling to target the Migrant Fleet's life ships. By disabling that, they would have the chance of reducing Quarian casualties, which would likewise buy time for Legion to track down the Reaper base.

Shepherd thanked him and with Tali, departed for their cabin.

"Could we have Auntie Raan up for something soon?" asked Tali. "When I was on the fleet, I made dinner for the two of us every three days. I'm afraid if I don't invite her soon, she'll think I'm mad at her."

"Is this before, during, or after we make love again?" queried John.

"Yahn!"

John chuckled.

"You're horrible," sighed Tali. And then she leaned onto him and when the elevator opened at their cabin she promptly walked into it and removed her helmet and hood and . . .

. . . Sneezed.

"Bosh'tet!" she muttered to herself. She looked a little sad and John put her helmet and hood back on, but not before he kissed her once.

John proceeded to get into his sweats while Tali sat at her desk and looked rather discouraged.

"Hey," he said putting his hands on her shoulders. "You'll acclimate soon enough again."

"I yust . . ." she began. "Don't want to have to start all over again, to have been able to be so close to you and then . . ."

"You mean we're strangers now?" he said with a slight grin on his face.

"No!" she stammered. "But . . . Well . . . You know."

"I know exactly," he said. He gently lifted her out of her chair and led her to their bed. Then he gently pushed her onto it and then walked around to the other side and got on it himself. He pulled her close and held her.

"You remember all the talking we were able to do when you could only spend ten minutes out of your helmet?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said snuggling up.

"Well, what better way to reacquaint ourselves now that you're once again in your suit with me?"

"But . . . Are you sure? You don't want . . ."

"Of course I want," he chuckled. "You think that after seven months of being bored out of my skull followed by moments of stark terror and overwhelming futility, I didn't want to do what I did with you before we went on that dreadnought? You think I don't want to do that again? Tali! We're still essentially newlyweds. According to my father's best buddies, in the first year we're supposed to make love more times than all the rest of our married years put together."

"Well we certainly started out like that," giggled Tali. "We'd get up in the morning and make love, then get down and see about saving the Normandy while adrift in the Collector System. And then we'd come back up here at the end of the day and if we were not exhausted, we'd make love again and fall asleep in each other's arms . . ."

She sighed.

"And we didn't stop doing that until we landed on Earth and those Bosh'tet police came in and threw you on the ground and . . ."

And she burst into tears.

"Hey," he said. "It's okay."

"They were so cruel to you, and you had done nothing but try to save their lives. You made that horrible decision which bought us six more months of time and all they did was shut you down and do nothing."

"You were right you know," John sighed. "In the end, it wasn't worth it. What was the point of wasting six months if they were not going to do anything. Had I let the Reapers through, if that was the thing which was about to happen, then . . . well we'd still be here wouldn't we?"

Tali nodded her head.

"It's even possible that Gerrel would not have been able to start his little war since of course, the pressure would have been up so much sooner," she observed.

"It wasn't worth it Tali, it wasn't. I never will do something like that again. If my saving the galaxy requires me to kill an innocent to do it, then the Galaxy dies."

"Yahn! You can't mean that!"

"I can Tali, because I forgot there is a God up there who happens to know all the what if's already. He knows just how to make any decision I make for good reasons work for the best. And for that reason, if I choose to make a choice to spare innocents, even if the Galaxy is threatened with destruction for doing it, I don't have to worry about the Galaxy. It's not my responsibility. What I needed to do with Kaiden and Ashley was get the team together before we brought the Bomb into play, and we could have all vacated together. Ash would have been with us together and maybe Horizon would have worked out better. What I needed to do with Dr. Kenson was confirm that the Reapers were coming through and leave to alert the fleet. They would have had their own evacuation plans already in place."

"But they would have not flown the Asteroid into the Relay," argued Tali. "They wanted the Reapers to come!"

"Precisely," replied John. "But likewise Kenson would not have stopped me from leaving her group alone. And the Politician's pain in the ass would have been saying T-minus two days, six hours, five minutes, and seven seconds and that is something the Military does not ignore. We would have been more in place when they had come through."

"But the Batarians?"

"Even they would have been given warning," sighed John. "And even if they had not paid attention, they would have been forced to acknowledge that a human had warned them of their approaching doom. No matter how it slices Tali, it would have been better if I had just issued a warning and not tried to buy them more time. Especially when that purchased time was going to cost so many lives."

"But Yahn, the Reapers would have killed them anyway," sighed Tali.

"But I would have not," answered John. "And that would have made all the difference."


	22. Chapter 22 - Wanderer's End

The Normandy was orbiting around Rannoch with the fleet, and Tali was in the observation room watching the planet beneath her shift in hue as Tikkun shined upon it. It was her home world, the land that her ancestors had fled. On one hand, it looked like a trillion other planets she had looked upon, but at the same time, there was a pull, a silent subtle invisible longing which seemed to radiate from that sphere beneath her. She found the play of emotions puzzling. She had never set foot upon it, yet some how she was certain she should. She had no images by which to compare it with, yet somehow she was certain they were beautiful.

"Is my little space Jew looking at her promised land?" asked John coming up behind her and placing his hands upon her shoulders. She leaned back upon him.

"What are you talking about?" she asked.

"Old tale in the scriptures," explained John. "God selected a people and gave them a homeland, but they left it and moved somewhere else. Then their new neighbors enslaved them and God then freed them and then led them back. Then they spit in his face and refused to worship him so He let them alone and they got rounded up and hauled off as slaves again. Then He led them back and they once again rejected him and so He let them go and sure enough, they got exiled yet again. Then He led them back again . . ."

"Why would He even bother?" groaned Tali.

"'How odd of God to choose the Jews,' is the rhyme. I forget who originated it. But you have been looking out this window for the past forty five minutes. I couldn't help but wonder if you are feeling something akin to what they felt when they were wandering."

"How long did they wander?"

"The longest was One Thousand Nine Hundred years."

"And they still haven't learned?"

"Nope."

"That's yust so . . ."

"Stupid?" asked John smiling. "You know, when you read all the classic tales of people wandering, some are looking to go home, like in the Odyssey and some are looking for a new home, like in the Aeneid. But only the Jews keep losing their home, getting it back, and then up and losing it again. So maybe perhaps I could call you my little Space Ulysses. But first of all, you're a girl, and not a guy. Second of all you're younger and cuter. And third, you were not driven off your home world, but your ancestors were. And when it comes down to it, I can't imagine wanting to make love to Ulysses."

"I should hope not," giggled Tali.

"His beard is itchy," continued John.

"Yahn! I should hope it had something to do with the fact that he's a guy!"

"Well there's that too, but the beard . . ."

"Commander?" came Joker's voice over the intercom. "Cortez reports that the shuttle is ready to make a landing in order to rescue Admiral Koris. Admiral Xan has just sent the coordinates. I'll dive in as close as I can and then let you go."

"Thanks Joker. Start the descent now. We're on our way."

"Tell Tali to bring back postcards," quipped Joker.

The two of them headed to the elevator.

"The home world," whispered Tali. "I'm about to set foot on it."

She was trembling.

"It will be night it looks like," observed John as he checked his Omni-tool.

"Yahn, I don't care," she said. Then she looked at him. He could see her white eyes through the visor They seemed to have a little smile in them. "But then again, maybe I do. Maybe we can slip away somewhere private, the two of us . . ."

"And take samples of the local rocks?"

"Yahn? I have a fist."

The Normandy dropped the shuttle in the lower atmosphere and began to home in on the signal from Admiral Koris' shuttle. Admiral Xan sent more messages, specifically that the Civilian Fleet was in a panic.

"We should have gone sooner," groaned John.

"With what?" queried Tali. "You can't have the team go from one high stress ten hour mission to another high stress mission. They needed the sleep."

John scanned the team. James was still trying to catch a few Z's. Javik was in a meditative pose, though he wasn't meditating. Liara was next to Garrus, her head resting upon his shoulder. Garrus was leaning back, his eyes likewise closed. Edi and Legion were standing next to each other, looking at each other, but John knew they were chatting up a storm since that is what EDI said they did often. Only Kaiden was awake, but he was leaning forward just staring straight ahead.

John sighed.

"You're right Tali. But I just wish. They've been down there ten hours now, who knows how many of them are left."

Tali put her hand on John's shoulders. "You can't save everyone," she whispered.

"Commander?" queried Cortez from up front. "Have you got a few moments? There's something I want to discuss with you."

John gave Tali a head bump and walked up into the front compartment of the shuttle and sat in the co-pilot's chair. Cortez leaned over and spoke in a low voice.

"I've noticed that Joker and EDI seem to be close," he said. "Am I correct in that assumption?"

John nodded.

"I didn't think EDI would be sexually um . . . accurate," he continued. "It's what I told Samantha when she expressed interest in EDI when she thought EDI was a VI."

"You were correct," replied John. "EDI is not, shall we say, entirely anatomically correct. She has the shape of a woman's body, but the outer covering you see? That's her . . . skin."

Cortez looked at him for a moment.

"Then why would Joker be interested? If he can't make love to her . . ."

"Well to start with," continued John in a low voice since this was not the sort of conversation that the entire team needed to be privy too. "Joker has Vrolec's syndrome. Brittle Bone Disease. He can't exactly make love without running the risk of fracturing something, so even if EDI was sexually dimorphic, he still couldn't."

"But why?"

"Because Cortez, they have mutual interests. The Normandy is the thing they have in common. EDI recognizes Joker's fondness for her and likewise Joker sees in EDI the perfect soulmate."

"But they can't . . ."

"Joker might miss it," continued John. "But EDI does not. And as far as Joker is concerned, that makes it perfect. He doesn't have to worry about frustrating her."

"I don't understand," continued Cortez. "It makes no sense. What's the point of a relationship if there isn't any sex?"

"Because there's more to love than sex," replied John. "A lot more in fact. Look at me and Tali? Right now we can't because she has to readapt to the Normandy. That might take weeks. But we talk, we do things together, there are mutual interests which enable us to express our affection. And when we get old, we won't even be interested. Eventually testosterone levels drop, and menopause happens, and we're just two old people who have silly names to call each other because once upon a time we couldn't keep our hands off of each other."

John turned to Cortez and smiled. "It'll even happen to you," he said. "Give it forty years."

Cortez looked at him with horror.

"Joker and EDI are soul mates who will be with each other probably to the end of their days if they can manage," ended John. "Because they see in each other something worth having. For Joker, it's a girlfriend who won't care that he can't, for EDI? He's the first human who reached a level of trust with her and likewise, the human who cares more for the Normandy than anyone else.

Cortez was still struggling with the concept. John got up.

"Cortez, you're a damn good pilot and I'm glad you're getting us to where we need to go. But don't define yourself by either it or your sexual activity. Both are transient parts of life. Some day, you'll be too old to do either. And if these things are your identity? You'll end up so depressed you'll contemplate suicide."

Cortez turned to him, half curious half irritated.

"Then who are you?"

"I'm a man who has a job to do, and when he's done it, he dies," answered John. "That's really, in the end, who all of us are."

It was at this point that several anti-aircraft bursts exploded around them. The shuttle's shields took the damage, but it was clear that they were going to have to nape of the earth it. Cortez dropped smoothly and was weaving between rock formations.

"Going to have to drop you at the first flat area," he said rapidly making adjustments. "You'll need to take those anti-aircraft weapons out or more specifically that jamming tower that is coordinating them if we're going to get the Normandy, or even just this shuttle, down to pick up the survivors."

"Got it!"

"Get ready team," he shouted coming back into the main passenger part of the shuttle.

Cortez brought her down gently and opened the door. The team leapt out and got into formation. Liara and Garrus shot ahead on John's right while John formed the point of the wing with Javik and James on his right and left respectively. Kaiden and Tali got behind. EDI moved to the left flank with Legion.

Then John paused for a second and looked back at Tali. He had his suspicions this would be an emotional moment for her. In fact, everyone in the wing formation was looking at her, save Javik who was looking ahead.

"Yahn," she whispered on the pri-com channel. "It's like . . . I'm home."

"You ready?" he asked.

"In a second. There's something I need to say first," she replied. "I . . . I love you."

"I love you too," he replied.

"Let's go save my . . ." and she seemed to pause trying to come up with a word. "Family," she finished.

The team moved forward. John had expected Tali to be more emotional, but it was night and things were somewhat obscured, and second of all, they were here to save her fellow Quarians. She would be more concerned about them. He suspected if the sun rose, she would then be far more emotional because she would be seeing her world for the first time in all it's glory.

"To be standing on the land of my ancestors," whispered Tali on the public channel.

The team continued to move and rounding another outcropping of rock, they saw the ocean. To their left, the jamming tower rose like a landmark, roughly a mile away.

"Jamming Towers, Anti-aircraft batteries, rocket launchers," sighed James. "The Geth have an army down here."

"Been here by themselves for 300 years," observed John.

"Good thing then they don't have nukes for backpacks," he finished.

The team moved on for a bit.

"Yahn!" whispered Tali. "The ocean . . . it's . . . so beautiful."

"You going to be okay?" asked John.

"In a second Yahn . . . It's yust so emotional right now. You know earlier I was serious about finding a place to make love with you while we're here."

"You're on the public channel, Tali."

"Keelah!"

"Hey, you two are married . . . It's okay. Just . . . be a little more circumspect," advised Garrus.

"Besides," added Liara. "You're putting ideas into Garrus's head."

"Well Liara, if you keep talking about how romantic it all looks, it's going to worm its way in there between organizing my calibration schedule."

A few seconds later, the crack of a sniper shot informed the team that Garrus and Liara had spotted a patrol of Geth. The team moved up and quickly dispatched the patrol, then investigated the sight. There were several Quarian corpses. Tali just stood by them with her head bowed.

"To have come so close . . ." she whispered.

"Mark the spot EDI, so that we can collect these bodies later and give them the proper rites," ordered John.

Tali gently sprinkled a bit of soil on each of them, and then the team moved on.

"Land mines ahead," radioed Garrus.

"I can do without Land mines," offered James.

There were a series of explosions as Garrus sniped out the land mines and then a patrol of Geth began to approach. These clearly were a military unit in battle formation looking for the team. Garrus began the exchange while John positioned his team for the approach. Then Legion began his sniping while EDI spotted for him. Over the next ten minutes, both parties exchanged fire from cover with John's team slowly gaining the upper hand. The Geth, after taking several casualties, withdrew.

"Forgot how tough the Geth are," whispered Kaiden on the pri-com.

"I miss Wrex," replied Tali. "Do you?"

"And Ash," answered Kaiden. "You know, Ash and I flirted during the first part of Virmire on the pri-com channel too."

Tali giggled.

"Good thing you were not on the public channel," she suggested.

"Yeah, I'd have had to explain sex on the beach to you," replied Kaiden chuckling. "She didn't play coy at all." He sighed.

"I don't think you need to explain that to me Kaiden," answered Tali. "Seems obvious enough to me, standing on the shore, looking out on . . . my ocean. All you're doing is putting ideas in my head . . . If Yahn and I vanish for a bit, come up with a good excuse will you?"

"Yes Ma'am," answered Kaiden. "But I don't think it will be necessary. That public channel slip you see . . ."

"Oh yeah . . ." giggled Tali. "Even if we actually leave to get rock samples . . ."

The team entered into another running firefight with the Geth as they approached one of the AA gun emplacements. Once they took it, Tali and Legion began to de-activate the guns while the rest of the team formed a perimeter around them to ward off persistent counter attacks by the Geth. Each AA gun had to be disarmed separately, so there were three single pitched battles before the guns were taken out.

As they moved forward, they ran into more Quarian corpses. The patterns of the casualties were suggesting to John that the Quarians who had landed with Koris had tried to take out the tower themselves and had failed. It wasn't a surprise to John, these were civilians who had been forced to be soldiers. And now they were dead. John doubted that Koris had done this deliberately. It had been more likely an act of desperation. A gamble that failed simply because there were so many Geth.

Then the found a survivor, a technician named Dorn'Hazt who had stayed behind as a rear guard in an effort to buy the other civilians time to retreat. They treated him with Medi-gel, but he was certain he had lost too much blood already. He began to lose consciousness, but he had one last thing to say.

"Tell my son, tell Yonah his father made it to the home world."

Tali nodded as the body went limp in front of her.

"EDI?" began John.

"Already done Commander," replied EDI.

"We can hope Tali," suggested John as Tali kept looking back to where Dorn was laying. "Now let's get to that tower."

The team moved through the boulders and along the animal trails. There were more running firefights and finally they reached the last two AA guns. Tali and EDI swiftly disabled them while the rest of the team held off the attacking waves of Geth. Then signaling the shuttle, John watched as Cortez swooped in and blew out the jamming tower. They were now able to hail Admiral Koris.

"Dorn? This is Admiral Koris, are you there? Dorn?"

"This is Commander Shepherd, Dorn did not make it Admiral."

"I . . . see," groaned Admiral Koris on the commlink.

"I'm coming with a shuttle, where are you?"

"My surviving crew and I are at a clearing, I'll upload our location."

"Stay together, I'll meet you there," replied Shepherd.

Cortez had landed the shuttle by that time and the team had loaded up. With the new coordinates just minutes away, they sped over to the site.

"Another wave," radioed Koris. "Hurry."

The shuttle came in just as the Geth were closing in on the huddled party of Quarians and proceeded to strafe the area where the Geth were located. The Geth took to cover and the shuttle landed and the Quarians ran to the shuttle. The team dismounted spread out and provided covering fire. The Admiral came last and then the team mounted back on, and John and Tali were last. Cortez took off.

"The Geth are not firing on us," cried one of the Quarians looking out of the window. He appeared to be a young fellow.

"You're leaving," answered John. "They don't pursue you. Retreating Quarians are not a threat to them."

John looked over them, just a couple dozen frightened civilians who had been thrown into a war they had not wanted. Tali was moving among them, whispering words of comfort to them. Once again, she was thinking of others. Once again he was reminded just how good a woman she was.

"Now that we've driven the Geth straight into the Reapers arms, I'd give anything to stop the madness of this war," groaned Admiral Koris.

"It's why we need you," assured Shepherd. "I only hope we can put enough of a leash on Gerrel that we are able to secure a peaceful resolution."

He looked at Legion who looked back at him. Admiral Koris noticed him for the first time.

"You have . . ."

"He is the Geth who came to me and began the peace process," stated Shepherd. "And Tali was negotiating with him right up until Gerrel began the attack."

Admiral Koris looked at Legion for another moment.

"Was there a chance?" he began.

"Consensus was being reached when Tali and I first began negotiations, but as Admiral Gerrel's attacks on the borders began and increased in frequency, consensus for defense became the chief priority," replied Legion.

"Is there a chance still?" asked Admiral Koris.

"The Geth agree that peace with the Creators is preferable to an alliance with the Reapers as we are outside of the Reaper plans and accordingly can not trust them once they have completed their harvest of other species, including the Creators," replied Legion. "As our primary functions are for the service of the Creators, the Reaper harvest of them would deprive us of the means to achieve our future."

Admiral Koris sat down and seemed to think this through, and the more he thought, the more he lowered his head.

John looked up at his team. They were once again trying to catch some sleep, save EDI and Legion who were once again silently facing each other.

"Does Joker know you are chatting with Legion all the time?" he asked smiling.

"Indeed he does," replied EDI. "In fact he is conversing with me and Legion as well. I include him in all my conversations when he is at his station."

John leaned back. He closed his eyes, and for a second mused on that ocean they had passed, on the sand on that beach, of Tali laying naked on the sand and him approaching her.

He looked up again. Tali was still working with the Quarian survivors. Once again he was noticing how they were looking at her as their heroine. She had come for them, saved them. He was glad. But he did wish they had been able to be on that beach for a bit.

The shuttle pulled into the Normandy's docking bay and the entire troupe exited.

"No rock samples this time," he sighed to Tali as he and she retired to their cabin. Once he got there he went on the public channel to the whole ship.

"This is Commander Shepherd, we will take twelve hours for rest and refit before our next mission, provided the necessary intel is gained. Liara? That means you too. Sleep first, then assist Legion. I will need you at full strength. You are not EDI. We're still on this team. If we pulls this off, we will have peace between the Quarians and Geth and that's two more allies for our fight with the Reapers. Shepherd out."

He looked over. Tali had removed her visor and helmet and was sniffing the air.

"It's been twenty one hours Yahn, maybe I . . ."

"Just be careful Tali. You worry me sick every time you get sick."

She just looked at him.

"You ordered the crew to sleep Yahn, come to bed," she commanded.

"Yes dear," he groaned and proceeded to get into his sweats while she lay on her back on the bed with one leg crooked up. She was gently swaying it back and forth as she watched him with a little smile on her face.

"You're just guzzling the power aren't you?" he suggested as he walked around to his side of the bed.

"It's fun ordering you around," she agreed. "But not on the battlefield."

She sighed and cuddled up to him.

"I'm such a baby on the battlefield. Every time I get scared. How do you do it?"

"I act like you do," he whispered. "I act as if it doesn't matter and go ahead. Of course there are moments when the fear is gone because you're winning, or because you're so busy shooting and loading you haven't got time. But Tali Duck, everyone get's scared. If we didn't, we'd do something stupid and get killed. I like the fact that you get scared. It means you'll be careful. I don't want you to die. Not yet. Not yet."

He looked into her eyes again. They were glowing in the darkness, catching every little bit of light. She simply looked back at him. And that was how they fell asleep.

When he woke up again, seven hours later, he was on his back and she was cuddled up to him. Her helmet and visor were back on. He sighed. The old Normandy of Cerberus had spoiled him rotten. He had gotten used to waking up and seeing her face, her hair, her hands, and her toes. So much alike and yet so much difference. All those different details that made her a Quarian, distinct from a human. And yet, in spite of that, she was also a woman, and a woman worth loving.

"What's been the biggest surprise of it all?" he asked, looking at the crucifix over his bed.

Him coming back of course. That was the biggest one. She got the big ones. But he had received a few himself. He paused for a moment. She had looked like that when she was asleep in the pod after she had gotten drunk during Liara's initiation party. He wondered if she ever figured out that he had been the one who had helped her get in. His mind wandered back to the alleyway behind Chora's Den. Her leap behind that box, Garrus being an old smoothie trying to help her up as she pointed a pistol at him. His sudden impression when she admitted that she knew how to beat a Geth memory wipe. Her willingness to join the team, and then her weepy face when he started to drill her. And all the while, the fact that his eyes continued to go back to her, wondering who the girl was under that helmet. Wondering why her eyes glowed like that. And then when he began to wonder if he'd ever meet a human girl like her. And the frustrations, the wishing he was Kaiden, and then when he was at his lowest, wondering how long before the galaxy began to end, hearing those three words that suddenly made hope come alive again . . . "I love you".

And there she was, the woman that had moved to his center over the past three years, little by little, bit by bit. The woman who was sleeping quietly on their bed, in their cabin. The woman he had made his wife.

She stirred, wiggled a little, and then he saw those two faint lights behind the glass. She was awake. She looked at him.

"Yahn? What are you doing?"

"Watching you sleep, and then watching you wake up," he answered.

"And you were not bored?" she inquired with a slight giggle in her voice.

"It's pretty tough to be bored with you," he answered. "You being there, sleeping like a lump on the bed, still manages to bring back happy memories."

"Lump?" she asked, somewhat skeptically.

"Yes, Lump!" he replied walking over and picking her up.

"Yahn!" she squealed.

He gave her a big squeeze and then let her down. Then a little bump on the forehead.

"There is nothing in my translation protocol which suggests lump as a term of endearment," argued Tali.

"It's right up there with hippopotamus," he said playfully swatting her on the backside. She yeeped most gratifyingly.

"Down to breakfast," he sighed. "Then to briefing for the next mission. You ready to walk on your home world again?"

She just stood there for a second looking at him. And he realized that her emotions were playing very strongly in her at that moment. He really had no idea how intense this all was to her. On one hand, he felt for the suffering on Earth, but they hadn't lost Earth yet, not yet. There were still men on her, there were still homes standing. There were vales and mountains where the Reapers had not yet trod, where the grass still grew, the flowers still bloomed, and children still played though their father's anxiously watched the skies.

But for the Quarians, it had never had that real touch to it. It had always been the myth, the mystical homeland that none of them had ever seen, born on ships, dying on ships. To be this close to it, to be almost able to finally rest upon it.

Suddenly she was holding on to him as tightly as she could.

"You have been the most wonderful man," she said through tears. "You . . . You are going to take me home. You don't yust love me, you love my people. You are going to give me the one thing I thought I could never have gotten. Yahn . . . Yahn . . . Yahn. . ."

Part of him wanted to say, "Hey! I'm just a guy who thought I could do something nice for my wife." If it hadn't been for Legion, none of this would have happened. There never would have been that chance for peace. His strategy now would have been to either win the war for the Quarians or get them out of the system so their fleet would be of use against the Reapers. How many years would it have taken? It wasn't his plan to run into Legion on that Reaper derelict. He looked up at the crucifix again. It had been someone else's plan. He merely had picked up on it.

Not that he didn't appreciate the adoration she was giving him at the moment.

Her visor was wifting off the tears.

"When this is all over with," she said quietly. "I really want to find a place, nice, private, secluded. Where we can make love. Promise? I want to experience all of your love, as close as I can, with all of my world next to it."

"I promise Tali," he said. "On one condition."

"What?" she said, with just the hint of annoyance in her voice.

"That you don't remind me on the public channel when we get down there."

He could see her eyes go bright pink under the visor.

"Okay," she said in a little girl voice. Then she begin to giggle.

"Let's go down to breakfast," he said.

And they did. And she giggled all the way down the elevator. And then some more as they went through the breakfast line. And still giggled a bit as they ate breakfast with Garrus, Liara, Kaiden, and James joining them.

"That must have been a very intriguing joke," mused Garrus after listening to Tali's occasional bits of giggle for several moments.

Tali wanted to say, "Wouldn't you like to know" to Garrus, but she kept giggling so she said nothing.

The briefing was simple enough. They were going to the Reaper Base, where they would disable the signal which was keeping the Geth coordinated. The targeted tower would need to be painted by the sighting laser, and that required a clear line of sight. Legion would chiefly disable defenses with EDI as a forward sabotage team. The rest of the team would move to a position where they could paint the target and have the Migrant Fleet take it down.

The Shuttle landed at sunrise, Legion and EDI moved out ahead, and the rest of the team got out and organized for a moment, giving Legion and EDI time to start the process of sabotage. John, suspecting that Tali would have a serious emotional moment, factored in some 'get her rear in gear' minutes. It's not as if anyone else on the team would be surprised by Tali's emotional response to seeing Rannoch under the sun of Tikkun, but it was one of those things that Shepherd knew he was going to have to factor in.

Tali was on the ground, running her omni-tool over the surface picking up things and examining them. She was almost like a child with a new toy.

"I . . . still can't believe it," she said quietly. "I don't think it's really come real for me yet. Yahn . . . Look at the sky. And the rock formations. We used to write poems about them. Our . . . Our bodies carried the seeds that spread the desert grass."

She wandered about for a second while the rest of the team looked on.

"The living room will be right . . . Here!" she said as she formed a finger frame towards a nearby ocean bay."

"There?" asked John. "You want our home there?"

She laughed happily. "I just claimed the land. I know it isn't much, but Yahn, when this is over, we'll have a home . . . That is . . . if you want to live here . . . with me."

"Tali?" said John folding his arms and looking at her and half smiling half laughing. "Last time I checked you were wearing my wedding ring. Under your glove?"

She looked at him for a moment and started to giggle again.

"Keelah, she groaned.

"Little sister in law is having a surreal moment right now," suggested Garrus. "But Tali, you've been wandering for centuries now. Are you sure you will be able to settle down in one spot?"

"We have gotten used to carrying our homes around with us," she admitted.

John reached down, picked up a small rock, and put it in her hand.

She looked at it and then looked back at John.

"Well, that's a start," she said quietly.

The team moved towards the base and began to close in. The jamming began to interfere with the Normandy's communications but Samantha persisted in finding new clear channels. Once again it was a long hard fight. Slowly, bit by bit, Shepherd's team worked their way to the top of the tower. As he and the team advanced, Gerrel and Xan's heavy and patrol fleets both pushed to clear a path themselves to an orbit above the sight.

There were a few moments in which they were able to move quickly, but for the most part, they had to advance inch by inch. The Geth were on their home turf. They had the fields of fire. The team could not afford to push forward quickly. Their shields were only so good. And the Geth figured out quickly what the goal was.

The fire fight lasted several hours. Medi-gel supplies were starting to diminish. Heat sinks were being scrounged, but they finally reached the top. The signal was emerging from a single shaft which had been heavily fortified. John reached the edge, leaned over and painted the target. In a matter of seconds, the Normandy flew by and launched a pair of missiles into the shaft and there was a very satisfying explosion which knocked John on to his tush because he had not backed up sufficiently by the time the Normandy had arrived.

"Yahn!" shouted Tali. "Are you alright?"

"Plenty of padding, nothing to worry about," suggested Garrus.

"Very funny Garrus," grumbled Shepherd.

"I have to agree, it was very funny," replied Kaiden.

And then all hell broke loose. Something was coming out of the shaft. There was a metallic scream and something very large literally began to rise up.

The Reaper signal had not come from Reaper technology, it can been coming from a Reaper.

Legion alerted Shepherd that he had a shuttle waiting for them. Shepherd's orders were simple enough, get out of the way, and the team made a mad dash for the shuttle. They were fortunate in that Geth reinforcements were still on the way and the Reaper had to climb out of the shaft first. And then it had to orientate itself, and then it had to prime itself for it's first shot. All this while, the Migrant Fleet had begun a bombardment of the thing. Then as it was priming for a shot at the fleeing shuttle, a lucky shot hit it right in it's gun port. That knocked it out for a moment.

"We've got an Achilles Heel!" shouted Shepherd. "When it primes it's weapon, it's vulnerable at the weapons port."

"The jamming towers are interfering with our targeting," replied Admiral Gerrel. "We have to fire manually."

"Shepherd Commander, we are able to evacuate while it recovers," advised Legion.

"It's the source of the signal. It will merely reintegrate with the Geth fleet. We have to take it out now!" shouted John. "Pull over! If we don't end this now, the Quarians are dead."

He lept out of the shuttle.

"Guess I get to slay a dragon," he muttered as he got out. Looking two hundred and fifty yards down, the Reaper remained prone and sparking.

"St. Michael!" he screamed and he charged.

All he had was the laser painter, but if everything worked the way it was supposed to, that was the only weapon he would need. The Migrant Fleet would do the rest, and their guns were way bigger than anything he or his team had.

"Yahn!" cried Tali leaping out and dashing behind him.

"Tali you can't help!" he shouted while running.

"Yes I can you Bosh'tet!" she replied. "I have an omni-tool and I know how to use it!"

And she did too, apparently she was busy linking up his laser painter to the entire Migrant Fleet.

But the Reaper was getting back up, and looking straight at him.

Or so he thought. After all, it resembled a very big ugly bug and all he could make out was that it's weapon was pointed in his general direction.

Big ugly bugs look very scary. And big ugly bugs have a very nasty bite. In fact John had no illusions about what would happen to his armor and him if he was hit by that weapon. But in order to wield a weapon that big, the big ugly bug was caught in a classic engineering bind. The bigger it is, the more of it you have to align in order to use it. And while the Reaper's tracking system knew the location of each and every single cell in his body, it's entire body had to be lined up to hit any one of those, which required it to maneuver. And that took time, more time than other things precisely because it was a big black ugly bug. John Shepherd on the other hand, was a small fast squirming (metaphorically speaking) human who kept hitting it's gun port with that insignificant laser.

John painted, when he wasn't ducking the Reaper's beam, Tali coordinated, in spite of the fact that she was close to a panic state from fearing for John' s life, and then, after what seemed to be an agonizingly long period of terror and suspense, a wave of energy bolts fell from the sky and pounded the Reaper. It had been so entirely focused on Shepherd, it had failed to account for the Migrant Fleet in orbit just above it's position. For fifteen seconds it was pounded, and then it collapsed.

Shouldering his laser painter, John walked towards the creature.

It opened it's weapon port again, and used it to look at him. Shepherd thought for a second.

"A lidless eye, ringed with malice," he mused.

"Shepherd," it said. It's voice was low, rumbling, and metallic.

"If you know who I am," he replied. "You probably also know you are dying. I'd be getting ready for the book at the gate if I were you."

"Harbinger speaks of you," it replied. "You resist, but you will fail."

"Ah yes of course, it can not be, you are invincible," replied John. "Do you have any idea how many would be human tyrants have made that same claim in your position?" he continued.

"The cycle must continue," it retorted.

"Ah yes, now the appeal to inertia," Shepherd answered. "We've been down this road already. Do you ever learn? We've stopped Sovereign and the Geth, we stopped Harbinger and the Collectors. We've earned our straight answer, and not a pack of cliches."

"It is not a fate you can comprehend," the Reaper said.

"Oh on the contrary," answered Shepherd. "We comprehend it all too well. It is you who have the issue with comprehension."

"You represent Chaos. We represent Order," it said.

"By whose definition?" answered Shepherd. "I saw what your 'order' was doing to Vancouver. I saw what your order was doing on Palavan."

"Every single organic civilization must be harvested to bring order to the chaos," it continued.

"And the mantra just doesn't stop," added Shepherd. He could hear the rest of his team running up behind him. Tali's hands were on his shoulders. He could feel her next to him as she slightly pressed against his back.

"It is inevitable."

"Back to the unstoppable inertia argument are we?" queried John.

"Without our intervention, organics are doomed. We are your salvation."

"Without sacrifice, the sun won't rise. You must die to save the earth," replied John. "Comes from the Aztecs. Has it sunk in yet that we humans have been hearing this pack of ideological and pseudo religious clap trap now for thousands of years? Or are you as dense as they were . . . before they self-destructed?"

"The cycle must continue. There is no alternative."

"And once again we are back to the unstoppable inertia argument. You know there is this thing called free will among organics and synthetics in this galaxy. We are not obligated to kill each other."

"The battle for Rannoch, disproves your assertion," it retorted.

"Well, finally, some acknowledgement that you have been listening to me. But the relationship between EDI and Joker affirms it. That's the thing about free will you see, both options are open. You choose to see one, but not the other. And you do so in order to keep yourselves from having to change."

"Finish your war, we will be waiting," it said. And then, it died. Or perhaps it's individual AI units finished evacuating to another Reaper body. John wasn't sure. It was behaving too cocky to be envisioning that it was dying. But then again, like Sovereign, it seemed to have suffered from the illusion that it could not be taken down by the forces arrayed against it.

"Yahn," whispered Tali. "We've done it. We killed a Reaper."

"Just like the talk we had on the first Normandy," mused Liara looking at the Reaper corpse.

"How can we not defeat them when they just blindly push forward with no real thought?" queried Garrus.

"Overwhelming force with lots of pain and suffering," answered John. "They are the biggest predator on the block and they are used to pounding their opponents into dust. Not once did I sense any doubt in it that it was going to win."

"We can confirm that the Geth are no longer being directed by the Old Machines," announced Legion. "We are free."

"Gerrel" came the thought into John's head. It wasn't over yet. And it could very quickly escalate into another disaster.

"You did it Shepherd!" came Admiral Gerrel's voice over the comm. "The Geth fleet has stopped firing."

"Good, now you stand down as well, and there will be peace," said Shepherd. "And you can rebuild Rannoch together."

"Yahn!" meeped Tali. She was starting to cry.

"They're completely vulnerable!" continued Gerrel.

"Oh God not again!" thought John.

"Shepherd Commander, the Geth only acted in self-defense after the creators attacked. Do we deserve death?"

"I know Legion," replied Shepherd. "And no you don't. Do you have any options?"

"The Reaper upgrades," suggested Legion. "With the old machine dead we could upload them to the Geth without sacrificing our independence."

"You want to upload the Reaper code?" asked Tali somewhat frightened. "That would make the Geth as capable as they were when the Reapers were controlling them."

She turned to John, he looked directly at her. He could tell she was getting frightened.

"Yes, but with free will," answered Legion. "Each Geth unit would be a true intelligence. We would be alive. And we could help you."

"Our fleet is already attacking. Uploading the code would destroy us!" cried Tali. "Yahn, don't choose the Geth over me!"

"Do you remember the question that caused the creators to attack us Tali'Zorah?" asked Legion. "Does this unit have a soul?"

"Upload the code Legion," snapped John. "Tali, we have to get the Fleet to stand down. I'm not going to choose to let innocents die!"

Suddenly Tali understood. He was back at the Alpha Relay.

"Uploading 10%" began Legion.

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. All units break of your attack."

"Pray everyone," shouted John looking back over his shoulder. "Seventeen million lives are riding on the blood lust of one Quarian Admiral."

"Belay that order!" retorted Admiral Gerrel. "Continue the attack!"

"20%" announced Legion.

"I beg you," whimpered Tali to Legion. "Do not do this! Please!"

"We regret the deaths of the creators," answered Legion. "But we see no alternative. 40%"

"No One Else Dies This Day!" stated Shepherd firmly. "Legion? Keep going!" He got on the Comm. "All ships, this is Commander Shepherd. The Reaper is dead. Stand down!"

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. Shepherd speaks with my authority!"

"And mine as well!" added Admiral Koris.

"Negative!" retorted Admiral Gerrel. "We can win this war now! Keep firing!"

"60%" said Legion.

"The Geth are about to return to full strength," continued Shepherd. "If you keep attacking? They will wipe you out! You want your grave to be on Rannoch this evening? Your entire history has been defined by your persistent determination to destroy the Geth, forcing them to rebel, and then forcing them to now fight. Forcing them to ally with the Reapers in order to live."

"80%" said Legion.

"The Geth don't want to fight you!" Shepherd continued. "You could have had peace with them last year. You could have been a full year on Rannoch already! If you can believe that for just one minute! This war would be over forever! You have a choice."

Then it dawned on him.

"EDI!" he ordered. "Broadcast the Reaper's last words to the entire Migrant Fleet."

And every single Quarian heard the phrase, "Finish your war, we will be waiting."

There was a brief pause of a few seconds. And it seemed as if the entire galaxy was taking a collective breath. He looked at Tali, she looked at him trembling.

"All units," said Admiral Gerrel. "Hold fire."

John Shepherd fell to his knees and exhaled. Then he fell on the ground as Tali leapt up to hug him and lost her balance as well. They laughed for a moment, and just about everyone joined in. It had been one of the most tense moments any of them could have remembered.

"Error," said Legion. "Upload incomplete. Direct personality dissemination required. Shepherd? I must go to them. I am sorry. It's the only way."

"Legion," said Tali, getting up and walking over to him. "The answer to your question is yes."

"I know Tali, but thank you," answered Legion. "Keelah Selai"

And Legion shut down as each individual program left him to spread among the rest of the Geth, and he ceased to be.

In the galaxy that is.


	23. Chapter 23 - 'Rocks' On The Beach

For a moment, Tali stood on the cliff edge looking over the ocean beneath her. John had ordered a six hour shore leave rest and refit. Folks were free to return to the Normandy, or wander on Rannoch. Overhead, he began to hear the roar of Quarian ships hovering and flying, looking for suitable landing zones.

John walked up to her and gently laid a hand on her shoulder. She turned around and looked at him for a brief moment.

"I love you," she said. Then she put on her comm. "Kaiden?" she said. "Yahn and I will be collecting rock samples for the next six hours. Inform Traynor to track all of Yahn's calls and business."

"Will do," replied Kaiden with such a tone that one could easily imagine his wide grin.

She took him by the hand.

"Where do we find our rocks?" she asked with a slightly flirty tone.

John started to walk and she followed him, holding his hand.

"I think I'd like to walk along the sea shore on the sand for a bit," he suggested.

"Rocks on the Beach?" she asked with a certain emphasis on rocks which implied that she was thinking of another word instead.

He looked at her. "Where did you hear . . ."

"Kaiden was sharing some special moments he had with Ashley on Virmire," answered Tali.

"How the hell did he and Ash find the time . . ."

"They didn't Yahn," answered Tali. "But they were planning it."

The two of them worked their way down the steep ridges towards the thin sandy beach. As they reached the bottom Tali, muttered "Bosh'tet" to herself and did a helmet palm.

"What did I do now?" asked John, half amazed half amused.

"Not you," she said. "Me. I'm on Rannoch and I am wearing my helmet."

She proceeded to remove her visor and handed it to him. Then she lowered her hood and detached the rest of her helmet. He simply looked at her face for a moment. Once again in their relationship, her face was a precious thing to him. She was only exposing it for a few moments each morning when they woke up.

"And I forgot my hair brush," she sighed pulling her hair out and trying to sort of arrange it without any mirror or other aid.

"You look beautiful," suggested John. He slipped the visor and the helmet into his back pouch, walk over to her, and ran his fingers through her soft feathery hair and arranged it down her back off her shoulders. He normally liked it on her shoulders, but not today, already he could see the wind picking up single strands of it and tossing them about. Each hair strand was so light, the gentlest of breezes seemed to toss it about.

"Do I really?" she asked. It was obvious she was fishing for another complement. John decided to bite.

"Beyond beautiful," he said. "Because you are on a real beach with real sunlight shining on you. So I'm going to take a picture now."

"Now? Yahn! I've not had time to brush my hair . . . I don't have my hairbrush!"

"Girl? Didn't I just say you were beyond beautiful?"

"Well yes but . . ."

"And what do you think you're going to look like in three minutes after this breeze tosses your hair all over the place. And once we've finished collecting rocks?"

Tali's eyes went bright pink and she giggled.

"And are you going to want me taking pictures then?"

"No Yahn! No!" Then she paused. "Well maybe."

John looked at her for a second. That had got to be the most unexpected shift in gears he had ever run into with her.

"Tali?"

"What better way to let my bond mate know I love him more than anything else in the world?" she suggested with a coy smile.

"Well actually," suggested John. "If you ever could learn how to make a really good pizza."

"Pizza? Yahn! I wasn't yoking!"

"Neither was I," replied John. "I'm serious."

"You think I'm ugly then?"

"Oh for the love of . . . TALI! When have I ever said anything about you was ugly?"

"Then why wouldn't you like me posing . . ."

John sighed and shook his head. He walked up and took Tali in his arms. He looked into those eyes, flashing little yellow sparkles in Tikkun's rays.

"I would love it," he replied. "Maybe a special album, nice, private . . ."

"Like a Christmas present?" she suggested giggling. "All wrapped up with me unwrapped?"

"Yes," he said, struggling to suppress his urge to make a cheesy adolescent grin. "But my point was this. It's not the only way to show that you love me more than anything else in the world. I mean Tali . . . Some day we're going to be old, fat, and flabby. You're going to find your strong and dashing Yahn with pale legs and droopy tush and beer belly hanging out and you won't exactly find me . . . exciting. What will you do when we're too old to make love?"

"But Yahn," she sighed. "I can't tell what tastes good to you. I don't think I'll ever be able to make something nice for you to eat."

"Okay so you won't learn to make a rich cheesy tomato with mushrooms and Italian sausage pizza." He sighed. "But I only want you to remember that love isn't just about how pretty you look naked, or that you're going to let your husband take photos of you when you are."

Tali simply looked at him for a moment. The wheels inside her head were turning.

"Remember how I taught you how to play chopsticks?" he asked. "Think of all the things we did together when we couldn't make love."

Tali seemed to pause for a second. "Like when I made your models fly.?"

"Yes," he said. "Just remember, so long as you let me walk along the beach with you, talk about stuff as I watch the sun setting, share a glass of Muskwin with me. You'll be showing me you love me."

"Okay, but I still want to find that spot to collect rocks," suggested Tali. "Now."

Tali's impatience to find that 'rocks' on the beach spot was persistent during the entire walk. But John was keeping an eye on the sky and knew that the Quarian ships were homing in mostly around the Geth base. Likewise, when he tuned into the comm chatter, it was clear that the Geth were already suggesting good landing zones nearby. He wanted to put a little space between them and the Migrant Fleet. He had no illusions that if the entirety of the fleet landed in the area, that many ships would fill up a four hundred square mile area easily. But he also knew it would take time. So they walked about three miles down the beach, which took them about an hour.

During that walk however, there was one moment which caused them to pause. There was a tree near the edge of high tide water line which had multiple branches and several root shoots which reminded John a bit of a mangrove. As he looked at the tree, he spotted something which made him want to laugh.

"Look Tali, up there on the branch," he said.

She looked. Upon the branch that John was pointing to, was creature what seemed to be a cross between a monkey and a wombat, gripping the branch with it's feet. It's toes seemed able to wrap around the branch itself. It was fat and fuzzy, it had a mouth that made it seem like a very contented but stupid creature. But what it was doing was holding up a frond in front of it's head and body and peaking around it at them. The frond was totally insufficient to hide it, let alone the fact that one could easily see it's hands holding the stem.

"It thinks if it holds up that leaf," giggled Tali. "We can't see it."

"Dumb little thing eh?" chuckled John. "What do you think it is?"

"I don't know Yahn," replied Tali. "I've not been on Rannoch for three hundred years."

"Ah so you're my old lady eh?" suggested John.

Tali pressed her lips together and gave John more of a push than a punch with her fist. In the usual spot of course.

"Totally worth it," laughed John.

The two of them walked on. The Bosh'tet, certain now that the strange scary creatures were going to leave it alone, bounded off to present the frond to it's mate in the hopes of having a litter by the rainy season.

When John reached the place, he knew it was the perfect spot. It was a small bay where two pillars of rock nearly came together and then opened up into a small inlet which had a wide sandy beach. And then he started taking pictures. He took shots of her with the sun behind her, and to either side, and her facing the sun. He did several close ups of her facing the sun, trying to catch that shimmer in her eyes. But mostly he was trying for that soft gentle Tali personality which he had come to love so much when they were acclimating during the Collector missions.

Then he proposed she remove her neck pieces and there were more shots, and then he slid her suit down so that her shoulders were exposed, and she took her purple shawl and wrapped it around her arms. She began to give him little saucy grins and winks and expressions that suggested some inside joke was being expressed or that more of the suit would be coming off shortly. The second proved the more prescient.

John had never spent so much time trying to take pictures, so he was keen on experimenting. He tried to get Tali to pose in numerous ways, always trying to catch the essence of her personality be it sexy, clever, artistic, geeky (such as when he proceeded to ask her to describe the principles of the Tantalus drive core engine while shooting), or simply catch the shape of a beautiful woman. And he began to suspect, given that Tali seemed to have lost her shy modesty, that some young girl fantasy was being played out in her head. But even as less and less of the suit was present, he kept going back to the artistry. He was determined to catch feminine beauty while avoiding any lurid suggestions. It was not always easier, but likewise, the more he focused on catching pretty and not pornography, the more poses, themes, notions, and ideas presented themselves. After about a half an hour, all she had left draped around her was her purple shawl. And then she discarded even that. And after about another fifteen minutes of her leaning against pillars of rock, seated upon an outcropping looking out, or laying naturally upon the beach, he paused to take a breath, and she got up and pulled him down.

That was the end of the photography for the evening.

An hour and a half later, the sun had long set, the stars were out, and the sky was nearly starless. John was reminded that the Tikkun system was literally on the rim of the galaxy. They were laying upon the sand past the high water mark of the tide and just watching the sky above. Small bright lights sailed across the sky, the reflections of the Migrant Fleet vessels waiting their turn to land. Tali had been doing heelrou for about fifteen minutes and he was listening to that gentle trill, his arm supporting her head so that she wouldn't get sand over her face. He had noticed that the sand seemed to stick to her skin better than it stuck to his.

"I wonder what is going on in the heads of the ordinary Quarian right now," he said out loud.

Tali stopped her heelrou.

"Mothers are crying. Kids are leaping about. Fathers are worried about the hazards on planet. Some can't believe the war with the Geth is over. Others are scared because they don't know what they will do on the planet," suggested Tali. "I wonder how many are yust sitting in a daze, not able to believe that what they had always dreamed of has come to pass. And I wonder how many bond mates are in the throes of deep grief because they lost their beloved in the war and now are about to set foot on Rannoch without the one person they dreamed of setting foot on it with."

She slid back onto his chest, wrapped her toes around his ankles, and rested her arms upon his chest. He could feel the sand on her body start to press into his skin. It wasn't entirely comfortable, and while he didn't feel like he was rolling in sandpaper yet, he did make a mental note.

"I am such a lucky girl," she sighed looking down at him. "Three years ago, a dashing human captain leapt in to save me. He made me one of his team mates. He made me learn how to fight with a team. He let me fall in love with him. And he fell in love with me too. And then he came back for me, even when death itself took him. He saved me again. And then he let me adapt to him. He made love to me, and I became his bond mate. Like a dream come true, I've made love to him on the home world. And now nothing stands between us."

He began to see tears rolling down her cheeks.

"I don't know how to say it. I want to laugh, cry, dance, hold you, sing, kick . . . I . . . I'm yust so happy I could. . ."

She lay her head upon his shoulder and he let her cry.

"There's an old Cheyenne tale that is told, of a Father who lost his son to the Crows and looked for him for thirty years. And then, he was reunited with his son on the day of his death. And he said, 'This is a good joke you played on me Great Spirit. To save the greatest happiness of my life, for the last day of it.'"

"Yahn, don't say this is the last day," she whimpered. "It's not fair."

"I didn't say that, Tali."

"Then why do you talk of dying at all?"

"My point Kitten, was that there is always a compensation for sadness and pain. And it is in perfect proportion to the loss."

Tali seemed to think about that for the moment. There were still tear streaks on her cheeks, but like many of her happy cries, it had been brief, only a few seconds.

"You mean, I'm so happy now because I was so sad at your funeral?"

"That's what I'm suggesting," said John.

She lay her head back on his shoulder.

"I never had been as sad as I was at your funeral," she recollected. "I kept thinking how cruel the universe was. How uncaring. To take you from me like that."

"And now?"

"I would not say totally worth it," she sighed. "But I am more happy right now than I've ever remembered in my life being."

"Well we have a couple of hours before we need to signal Cortez to pick us up in the shuttle. Is there anything else you would like to do?"

"Where do you want our home to be? What sort of home do you want us to live in? How many children should we adopt?" began Tali.

"One at a time please!" cried John.

"Well?" she said.

"I'd like our home to be on the outskirts of a spaceport," he mused. "I'll be the only human on Rannoch for a bit I suspect, and so I want some access to food and other things. A spaceport will eventually have a human enclave, as well as Turian and Asari and so on. We'll be able to have our friends over more often. And with a human enclave will be a church. I want to be able to be a good Catholic."

"If it's a spaceport," mused Tali. "We won't be that far from any planet. I think I'd like that. I can't imayine a life where I wouldn't be on a spaceship at least on occasion."

"My military background will make it easier for me to get work as well. I don't think we'll be rolling in the credits once all the Cerberus fortune and salvage we've picked up is expended."

"But can't Liara do something for us financially? Like tell us where the good investments are?"

"If there's an economy left after the Reapers," sighed John. "Yes. But I'm not banking on it."

"So why the outskirts?" asked Tali.

"Beach front property," suggested John with a smile. "Or at least an open space out the windows with a view."

"So you want big windows?" asked Tali.

"Some," answered John. "What do you want?"

Tali seemed to ponder for a moment, scrunching her mouth and resting her chin upon the fingers of her right hand.

"I want a bed room for us, with a bed yust big enough that I can easily snuggle up next to you but not fall out if you roll over like you have been doing."

"Wait a moment Tali, are you saying that sometimes I push you out of the bed?"

"Hmmm, twice now in the last four nights since I got back from the fleet, I suppose you can say it has been some times."

"And how long has this been happening? You said nothing on the Cerberus Normandy"

"It's been since I got back on. I don't remember it happening on the Cerberus Normandy. Yahn? I think they made the bed narrower in the cabin."

"Curse those Alliance Engineers, pushing my ducky out of my bed."

"They don't do it Yahn, you do!" said Tali poking him in the nose with one of her fingers.

"It would be kind of odd that they switched beds out," mused John. They really hardly touched the cabin."

"It must be your nightmares then," suggested Tali. "You cry out in the night. You thrash about. You seem to be chasing something."

John looked at her for a moment. Her eyes were glimmering in the starlight, not like the pale glow he would see in their cabin. There were still those little sparkles, only they were tiny and white. Suddenly he was so thankful that there was someone he could tell these things to, who wouldn't laugh, mock, or dismiss. Someone, he could unburden his cares upon.

"There was a child, a young boy, in jeans and a grey pullover. He had been playing with a ship model on a small upper level green when the Reapers came. He hid in a vent at first, and I tried to get him to come with me. He crawled further into the vents and I couldn't chase him. Then . . . Then I saw him one last time as I was getting on the Normandy, he was a block away by two shuttles which were loading up women and children. He got into one, they took off, and then . . . Then the DAMN Reaper that had been advancing on the site just shot both of them out of the sky. It was so deliberate. It could have been shooting the soldiers beneath it, but no, it had to take the time to blow out a pair of shuttles with women and children upon it."

Tali sighed and looked at him with sympathy.

"I see that boy, and others like him, in the night, in a dark forest. It's a real forest, yet it seems to be some waiting place for ghosts. I chase him, trying to catch him, and he always runs away, and then runs into a fire which consumes him."

She just gently ran her fingers through his hair and looked into his eyes, listening to every word.

"The horror Tali, it's the despair. The despair which sends people screaming from the gates of heaven when they are confronted with it after death. Javik told me of some race back in his cycle. They had so despaired that they sent a delegation to the Reapers asking for a single Reaper to come to their home planet. And when that Reaper got there, they sacrificed all their children to it."

"Yahn!" she cried.

"And the Reaper waited for the sacrifices to end. And then it left. And then three weeks later, it came back with other Reapers. And they harvested the entire planet."

"That's So Evil," shuddered Tali.

"Tali I get so overwhelmed at times I . . . I . . ."

And Tali just let him cry. She gently wiped the tears from his cheeks and kissed him on the forehead. And said nothing. But she knew something important was happening to her.

Oh it was a fun little girl fantasy to think that he had come back from heaven for her. But listening to him now, seeing his tears, broke through to her the vast importance of that decision. He wasn't back for her, he was back for the Reapers. Who was she in the whole scheme of things. Really. For a second she saw herself as just a ordinary Quarian girl who happened to know a bit about engineering, combat, and an enemy which was no longer an enemy. She suddenly felt so small and insignificant that she paused. Who was she to wipe away the tears of the galaxy's champion?

Then a little story that her Yahn had told her back after the treason trial popped into her head. It was the story of some Greek Tyrant who ruled one of the many city states in Greece back in Earth's earlier days who had been told that his visage and manner reminded his sycophants of the gods. The tyrant had turned to them and said, "My wife is unaware of this phenomena."

Suddenly, he was her Yahn again. He might be the galaxy's champion, but he wasn't going to be the galaxy's champion alone. He couldn't be the champion alone. No one could. It was like when she returned from the Alarei. For the ordinary Quarians, she was the champion, the one who had been there at the Battle of the Citadel, who had negotiated the peaceful surrender of the Geth. She always had struggled with that event in her mind. She knew that she did not deserve the adulation she had gotten, yet her Yahn had been very insistent that she do all the credit worthy stuff. And then he had insisted she take the triumph and . . . be the rock. Tali'Zorah, the slayer of Geth, the companion at the Battle of the Citadel, the one who gave the fleet the accretion disk. The woman who led them back to Rannoch. None of it would have been remotely possible on her own. Not without her Yahn, not without her, not without Garrus, not without Liara, not without Kaiden . . . It was all of them together. Each meshing their own talents and skills together. Just ordinary people, both with polish and flaws, who had been carefully fitted together by an outside hand to do what had to be done. She began to smile.

"Hey," she whispered. "It's going to be okay. We'll figure it out. That's why we're together. That's why you were sent back. And it's why I fell in love with you."

John began to chuckle through his tears.

"Did I ever tell you I love you?" he asked.

She paused and pretended to recollect.

"I think so, maybe once or twice," she replied giggling. "I just realized how important I am to you, and how important you are to me. I think I'm growing up."

"Tali, you've always been grown up," suggested John.

"I have a secret to tell you," she whispered. "You never really asked me how old I was. You only asked me my birthday and I had not figured it out and said I would get back to you."

"Why didn't you tell me?" asked John. "Because yeah I do remember that."

"Quarians measure time differently on the Migrant Fleet. It's all in cycles of work and sleep. So we don't really have birthdays and anniversaries. So I had to do all the calculations on my omni-tool to figure it out based on Earth years."

"Oh," mused John.

"I was born on Yanuary 26th, in the year 2169." She said. "When I met you, and fell in love with you, I was 14 in your years."

"Fourteen!" gasped John. "I could have gotten arrested!"

"How?" asked Tali.

"Fourteen is still very young for humans," explained John. "While we are physically adults, we often still grow and develop for another sixteen years. Even I am not considered entirely grown up though I am twenty-six. My brain won't finish developing until I'm around thirty."

"But why would you get arrested for falling in love . . . Oh! In human years I would not be entirely grown up, it would be like . . . Yucky."

"I guess that sums it up," chuckled John. "There's a slang term among guys. It's called jail bait. But there's another one too, when the girl gets old enough to be at the age of discretion, that is, sixteen, it's called robbing the cradle."

"Then it's okay," replied Tali. "You didn't bond with me until I was 16, so you only ran off with my cradle."

"It's . . . oh never mind," he sighed. "But the fact that I have this image of a naked seventeen year old girl on top of me is putting all sorts of . . . In my head . . . Well, nothing for it but to . . ."

"I can tell," she giggled. "I can feel it right down . . ."

And there was a half an hour of other activity.

The air was getting cold. And when Tali checked her Omni-tool, they only had forty-five minutes left of shore leave. So they got up and John worked at finding the bits of Tali's suit because she had scattered them all over the beach as she was busy posing earlier. It had never dawned upon him that this would prove difficult once the sun had set. And there was another complication. Tali was having a hard time getting the sand off of her skin and out of her hair. Finally, she got so frustrated she just let out a shriek that had just enough alien edge to it that made John get goose bumps.

"I'm sorry Tali, I am having trouble finding your suit pieces."

"Yahn! Don't worry about finding my suit. I know where it all is. It's this DAMN sand. I feel so gritty I could . . ."

"Here Tali," said John. "Let me help."

And he began to gently brush her skin to get the sand off.

"You're yust doing this to put your hands on me," she accused with a bit of flirt in her tone. "And I know how to use my hands to do this."

"Tali I just want to . . ."

She sighed. "I know Yahn, I guess we've had our yoy, now we have to deal with the frustrations again."

"I guess," he mused.

"Help me get into my suit, and I'll help you find your armor, and then I can run cleaning programs and you can signal Cortez."

And that is what they did.

When they reached the Normandy, they went straight to the bridge to check up on the ships status. Joker immediately suggested an interest in being a rock hound.

"So can I see these samples?"

John and Tali both pulled a collection of small rocks out of their pouches and plopped them into his lap.

"Ooo you are so on to me and EDI," Joker replied.

"EDI?"

"Commander, I thought it would be a joke to play on you," answered EDI looking at them from her seat to Joker's right.

There was another week of orbit around Rannoch as the Quarians and Geth began the long process of resettlement. But likewise, there were military conferences between Admiral Gerrel, John, and a Geth Prime unit which John named Admiral Harvey Nelson. Admirals Koris and Raan took the responsibility for settlement with Raan focused on getting the planet's agricultural base established while Koris began to plan for town and city layouts. The Geth had systematically cleaned up all the old Quarian ruins which would frustrate more than a few archeologists in the future, but likewise it enabled Koris to plan out settlement on an entirely planet wide scale. It was harder work since there were no clues or hints to prior settlements, but at the same time, Koris was able to add artistry to the lay out which pleased him immensely. Admiral Xan was best suited for selecting the engineering staffs which would be sent to work on the Crucible project. By the end of the week, Admiral Gerrel had developed a grudging respect for Nelson and at the last conference, as they began to work out details for fleet coordination between all the respective races, John began to sense a slight enthusiasm in Gerrel was he worked with Nelson.

"Mutual interests turning enemies into friends," was his summation.

But likewise, the Geth were beginning to show elements of artistry themselves. John picked up on this when Admiral Nelson referred to Admiral Xan as Creator Creepy Xan.

"You picked up on that," he observed.

"Creator Creepy Admiral Xan does not think Geth are alive," replied Nelson. "Her tone makes Geth feel, uneasy."

It was the evening cycle of September 15th. After the cycle had ended, the Normandy would return to the Citadel. Admiral Hackett had expressed gratitude for John' success with the Quarian/Geth issue and had decided that as there would be a few weeks needed to mesh the Quarian and Geth fleets to the combined allied fleets, this would be the perfect time to grant Shepherd and his crew an extended shore leave at the Citadel with time for the Normandy to receive an extensive refit, repair, and upgrade.

John tactfully reminded Admiral Hackett that they had yet to figure out what the Catalyst for the Crucible was, and how that was absolutely necessary for the success of the Crucible, and likewise Cerberus was still making mischief of a mean sort and doing so in a way which always seemed to play to the Reaper's advantage.

"The Crucible is still six months from its first tests," began Hackett. "Even with twice the staff that the Quarians and Geth will be sending, it wouldn't do more than shave a few weeks off that hurdle. It's a huge thing we are building, and it would even be a challenge with a free and at peace galaxy. But now, with Reapers persistently attacking and raiding and the dangers of indoctrination (Mordin's inoculation serum has proven a miracle by the way) we have had to find a stellar system which has no genuine strategic or operational value, build a station, and find ways of getting the resources to that station. So you can see where things are going. It could be a couple of years before we're ready. And it's no good sending you out to perform with worn equipment Commander, it will let you down when you need it most. No, you are going to take a three month shore leave on the Citadel, and Anderson has informed me that he and his wife had an apartment on the Citadel where they lived during his councilor term. He wants you to have it for the duration."

"That's awful generous of him," said Shepherd.

"Commander? I made the same observation and you know what Anderson said? He said that learning to live in rubble and eat half cooked maggot infested steak made him enjoy the luxury of a waterproofed tent and hot dogs over the fire," replied Hackett "'It's all dust in the wind at the end of the day,' he told me. 'So tell Commander Shepherd to have a real honeymoon with his bride and tell the crew to unwind and be happy for what good they can get, because chances are they won't get it again in a long time.'"

"Then tell Anderson that I am very much looking forward to taking him up on his offer and when this is over with, I intend to make it up to him," said John. "How are things on Earth?"

"Well the Reapers persist in trying to round up as many humans as they can, and we persist in trying to get as many humans out of the cities as we can. We can never get enough people inoculated, but the Reapers have a pattern and they stick with it in spite of any obstacles we throw at them."

"That sounds both good and bad," observed John.

"It is. On one hand, the Reapers persist in applying overwhelming force to what they want to take, and on the other hand, we persist in denying them the one thing they want most, which is the population which they use to melt down and build more Reapers with. The Spanish have come up with a very good system which they explain goes back to that period of time which they call the Reconquista. It was during the Islamic occupation of Spain. The Spanish would ride into the moslem controlled villages and escort young Christian girls out of the villages so they would not end up in the Harems of the Moslems. Suffice to say, they have formed numerous volunteer units, mostly Spanish or Hispanic, who are inoculated. They slip into the camps which the Reapers use to keep their prisoners until processed. And then work at inoculating as many as possible and then arranging escapes. The Reapers of course respond by putting more guards into the camps which forces them to move those troops from some other spot, which we then exploit. Anderson has whole months where he pretty much controls the entire country side of Earth outside the cities. Problem is the Reapers just bring in more soldiers and it takes Anderson twice as long to once again secure the countryside. He's never been able to drive the Reapers from a city. The Reapers seem to be strongest in urban settings. It's where they've always fought in their cycles. By forcing the Reapers to deal with human's in the countryside, Anderson is able to regain some initiative."

"At the cost of most of our population," groaned Shepherd.

"No one said this was going to be glorious or honorable," answered Hackett. "But it's clear that the Reapers are out of their comfort level when in the wilderness. So many trees for us to hide under. Too many rocks for us to hide behind. Too many crevices to shoot ambush from. And too many experiences with underground resistance for them to be able to just sweep us up. And they can devastate area, it just grows back. Based on what Anderson has said, it seems that this is one of the few times Reapers have had to deal with a resistance movement which focused upon defending not the cities, but the wilderness. We raid the cities, but we defend the wilderness, and so we constantly have some place to hide our non-combatants."

John paused for a moment remembering a certain Reaper and a Thresher Maw. "I saw that same out of comfort zone behavior on Tuchanka," He observed. "The Reapers depend on the civilization becoming sufficiently urban that once they secure the cities, the planet falls. But it makes sense, the Reapers only harvest civilizations which are spacefaring. Non-spacefaring civilizations are far far less urban and those the Reapers leave for the next harvest."

"And that pattern has never exhibited itself on Earth, or it seems, Tuchanka," observed Hackett. "We may have the means to make this war go on long enough to get the Crucible in play it seems."

"Take care Admiral," finished John. "I will Commander, Hackett out."

John walked away from the terminal.

"No strategic or operational value," he mused. "Perfect place for building the most important strategic asset we've got. It's the last place the Reapers would even think of looking, and the galaxy has hundreds of thousands of such systems."

John paused.

"And he didn't tell me where. Brilliant Admiral, brilliant."

He felt better than he had in a long time about the prospects of the war. When he reached his cabin, Tali was not there. He paused for a moment and seemed to think that there was something different about the place, but Tali was not around and that was who he was looking for. He decided to wander the ship to find her. He checked Engineering but when it was clear she wasn't there, he headed to the Starboard Observation Deck. That had been where Kasumi had lived during the Cerberus project, and also was the place where Tali would be able to see Rannoch. He needed to talk about that anyway with her. It wasn't something he wanted to do, for fear of her answer, but he knew he had to do it anyway, because even if she answered in a way he wanted, it was essential since that is what you did for the woman you loved.

He found her looking out of the window. Beneath them Rannoch seemed peaceful and serene. It wasn't as blue as earth, nor was it as green, but it was still a beautiful thing, glowing, floating in a sea of ink, between little white sparkles.

"She is beautiful," he said as he walked up to Tali. He always said something when he came up to her from behind. She didn't hear his footfalls always, and if he just put his hands on her, she, not seeing who, could react violently out of surprise.

"Yes," said Tali. "She is."

"You knew I was talking about Rannoch?" he inquired with a grin. He put his hands on her shoulders and she leaned back, so that he might wrap his arms around her front.

"If you had been talking about me, you would have said, 'You are beautiful.'"

"Ah"

"I've gotten used to the idea that you find me pretty."

"Tali . . . I have something to ask you."

"Yes Yahn?"

"You're home now, you have Rannoch. I am not going to make you come with me. You can stay here for the duration if you wish. Prepare a spot, build our house, make a home . . ."

"The Normandy is my home," she said. "Because it is your home too."

"You sure? I love you so much I can't order you to come with me."

"Yahn," she said. "I've walked on my world. I've made love to you on my world. It is more than I ever imagined I would have. When I left on my Pilgramagh, the home world was a dream. It was as far away as the next galaxy. Mist on the dreams of night between the stars."

She turned to face him.

"I am with you, forever. Nothing will separate us, save death. When the war is over, when the Reapers are defeated, then we will go back together, and build our home together, and fill it with children together. Grow old and have our tea on the porch while the sun rises. And if the Reapers win, then I want to die at your side, fighting them to our last breath, with our fingernails and teeth."

"I love you Tali."

"Then why did you ask?"

"Because I love you. Rannoch has always been so important to you, to up and say, 'Well it's a nice planet but we have a thousand thousand like it to save so come on girl, we got work to do.' made me think I was a little selfish."

She hugged him.

"It wasn't necessary, I never for a moment imagined that I would look at you and say, 'Well I have my home world back now so you run off and save the galaxy and I'll have a nice pizza cooked for you when you get home and bed time stories to tell the kids with.'"

She paused.

"But it was very sweet of you to give me the option."

John just held her for a moment. Then he gently turned her around so she might see Rannoch again and once again wrapped his arms around the base of her throat.

"What's our next mission?" she asked.

"Refit for the Normandy on the Citadel. Estimated time, three months. Full repair and upgrade. Anderson has given you and me the apartment he and his wife lived in while he was a councilor. It's on Silversun. You can see Ryuusei's down the way from it. We'll have three months there, and with a good filtration unit . . ."

"I'll be able to be without my suit for hours," sighed Tali. "Once I acclimate."

"We'll have a real Christmas tree at the end of it," he finished. "And a real Christmas. You've never been to a Midnight Mass have you."

"No, not even one in the day," she said. "Why do they call it Mass."

"Tali? Ten billion people have asked that question and Mother Church looks at them and says, 'I have no idea'," he said chuckling. "No one can even remember a time when it was first called that. There's no history book recording it."

Tali smiled under her visor.

"So," she said in a mischievous tone. "What is the Effect of this Mass."

"Well according to what I was taught by the Jesuits," began John. "It is supposed to distribute this supernatural quality called grace on each person which enables them to more clearly see the difference between good and evil and choose the good and . . ."

"That was a horrible pun!" he cried out.

"Is there a Relay for this Mass?" she continued.

"I'll show you the effect that comes when I apply the mass of my hands," he said.

"WHOOT! No Yahn! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT! Not fair! WHOOT WHOOT WHOOT!"

"You have a cabin for this sort of thing you know," drolled Garrus who was walking by them towards the bar.

Tali was on a chair covering her visor with her hands and making little kicks with her feet. John knew he was blushing horribly.

Garrus simply poured himself a snifter of Turian Brandy.

"Tali? You want a drink with me and the Commander," he asked.

"Okay," she squeaked.

"Yeah that would be a good idea," agreed John. "Get's the blood out of the face."

"Which might not be a good thing in some cases," observed Garrus. "Humans definitely have a need to blush on occasion, and if they can't, there's a problem."

"What do Turians do when they are embarrassed?" asked John.

"Turians don't get embarrassed," answered Garrus with a smile. "We are way too suave and stylish for that."

"Somehow," chuckled John. "I believe you."

"Of course," replied Garrus.

"So," he continued, showing that smooth quality of changing the subject to bring about normalcy in the flick of a few syllables. "What's our next twenty?"

"Citadel for refit and upgrades," replied John. "ET three months."

"Part of me wonders about the time spent but damn, I'm not begrudging it," replied Garrus. "These last few days have worn me down considerably. Hadn't felt this much pressure since before the Suicide mission."

"What was it about these last few days," asked Tali.

"Well for starters Tali, the Collectors, even with Harbinger's assistance, were not that dangerous as a fighting force. Not against us. The Geth on the other hand, they know how to fight, and they've only gotten better since Ilos and the Citadel. I'm very happy that they are now on our side. That should give the Reapers pause, if anything phases them."

"Nothing does seem to phase them," mused John. "But that's to our advantage. They are so arrogant that a veil of stupidity keeps them from being shaken up enough to actually do something about it."

"Don't underestimate them now," replied Garrus. "They were smart enough to recognize that you were a problem. The first Normandy is wreckage with a monument because you were on it. The Alpha Relay fiasco got you arrested for six months."

"You think it was a fake too?"

"Makes sense," replied Garrus. "It's not as if they can't fly through dark space to reach the Galaxy, if they were even that far away to begin with. The universe is this really big place and ten light years out of the galactic border, that's more space than we can hope to search for generations to come."

"So it was fighting the Geth," said Tali looking at her glass of brandy. John leaned over with an 'emergency induction port' and slipped it up her visor entry point for food tubes. She looked rather silly with a straw sticking out of her helmet but it was how she liked to drink on the ship. John watched her and smiled. He helped himself to a whiskey and soda. Whiskey only tasted good when he was stressed out, but then it was smooth. The soda simply enabled him to enjoy more smoothness before he had to stop.

"Well that was, as they say, only the beginning," continued Garrus. "Watching your commander play leap frog with a Reaper weapon's beam does amazing things to your heart rate. Especially since so much was hanging on his success. Were I any older I'd suspect that the heart would have started to attack me as well."

"So what did you do after the Reaper was dead?" asked Tali.

"Well you and Commander Shepherd were already heading out to find . . . rocks," answered Garrus. "So I proposed to Liara that we do an insect hunting expedition in honor of Mordin's fondness for them."

"But Rannoch has no insects," objected Tali.

"Apparently not," replied Garrus with a subtle grin. "But Liara did not seem to be aware of that fact." He paused and spoke more softly as if in contemplation for a sentence or two. "Or at least didn't let on she was aware. Maybe she was and I was merely playing into her little shadow broker schemes. You never entirely know with her. Once the absence of insects had been formerly noted, we engaged in some athletic contests among the rock pillars."

"Don't tell me," groaned Shepherd. "You had reach, she had flexibility."

"It's amazing how limber Asari are when they have to be," observed Garrus.

Tali was laughing so hard her straw flew out of her helmet and landed behind the bar.

John, grinning, suddenly remembered something.

"Tali?" he said. "I have a present for you from Auntie Raan."

"Oh?" said Tali.

John reached down on the lowest shelf of the bar and pulled out a pair of glass tubes, trimmed with silver edges.

"She gave these to me as a bonding present a couple of days ago when she came back for tea with you. The script is in Khelish so I don't know what it says, but I suspect is a his and her set of food and drink tubes. She didn't want to give them to you directly because she was convinced you would say no. I found this odd and said, 'So tell her to take them anyway.' And she explained that in Quarian etiquette, if you refuse a gift, you are being a good person who is thinking first of the fleet and therefore the gift is taken back. So by giving it to me, she knew you would get them." He handed them to her. She looked at them.

"This is awfully sweet of Auntie Ra'an," she said. "Not to mention sneaky, because she was right, I would have refused these because there's no real need for them on the Normandy. This one says Yahn, and this one says Tali."

John looked at the tube which had his name on it. The Khelish script was so completely alien that he might as well have been looking at children's scratchings on rocks. But he remembered the shapes for this one, so he could always know which one to give Tali.

He took Tali's tube, poured her drink into it, and clipped it to her helmet at the mouthpiece. He thought he saw a little twinkle in her eyes behind the visor, as if to say, "Thank you, I love it when you baby me."

"Yahn? I left something for you too up in the cabin. I have something to privately discuss with Garrus for a moment, so why don't you go up there now and have a look?"

"Where is it?" he asked.

"Look for it silly," she said. "If you can't find it you're even blinder than you normally are."

John sighed and left. As he reached the elevator, he realized that she wanted him to look because it would buy her time. Something she and Garrus needed to discuss? That was fraught with curiosity. But he suddenly realized something and was very grateful for it. Tali was Quarian. She was so bound to him now psychologically, that he would have to do something incredibly brutal to even cause her to think about betraying him and their relationship. He could trust her implicitly with Garrus or any other member of the crew. It was a very nice secure feeling. He only hoped she could feel the same level of trust for him. Even if she got drunk, she would stagger back to the cabin and wait for him before she started to flirt.

He rode the elevator up and walked into the cabin. And he started to look around. She slept on the left side of the bed, and there was nothing on that bed stand, and then he looked on the right side of the bed, and there was nothing there as well. Then he looked on her desk, there was nothing but bits of circuitry boards and the little tools she used to fix them. It was so nice that he could see those bits of her presence in the room again. It told him she was back. He looked at the aquarium, no fish, still. He turned, and there it was. On his desk. It was to the right of the ship model shelving, where he always had open space for projects.

It was a picture of her.

It was nicely framed, one of the shots he had taken on the beach, when she had just her shoulders exposed and her gloves off. There was just a slight edge of sexy to the smile. A sort of, 'this is fun but I am so going to make love to you shortly' expression.

Why that one? He had worked so hard to catch her being sweet, or thoughtful, or just plain pretty in an artistic sort of way. Then it dawned on him.

This was a picture taken when she was about to make love to the man she loved, on her own world. She had made it clear on so many levels that this was one of the most important and special moments of their relationship, almost as important as the first time. And unlike the first time, this one had worked perfectly. They had found the perfect spot, the weather was perfect, the mood was right, it was probably the most romantic moment she had ever had with him.

Of course that was the picture she picked. She was remembering that special time and that expression on her face was that intimate experience in a single instant, framed. But more importantly, it was the sort of expression which others would see as just a girl being a little sexy, but he would alone know just what was about to happen, and where it was about to happen, and how important it was going to be for her. And she knew it as well, and knew he would know.

The sort of moment that only two people in love and bound together could have and treasure their whole lives.


	24. Chapter 24 - Apartment Love Song

Six days later the Normandy pulled into Dock 24 adjacent to the Silversun ward. John and Tali walked out of their cabin, got into a rented sky-car, and flew to the apartment. They walked through a lobby which also substituted as a furniture store, and down a hallway to the entrance. John tested his Id chit and the door came open. For a second they just looked at it. The first thing John noticed was the baby grand piano. He had only seen a real piano up close twice in his life and never had he actually been able to sit down at it and press the keys. It was an entirely different experience since the keys did not flow easily as was the case with the tactile holographic version he played on the Normandy.

"Yahn! Look at this!" called Tali.

He turned around. There was a wide fireplace behind him at least four feet wide. It was gas, the logs were artificial, but they were well made and so the fire looked somewhat authentic. Above the fireplace was a wide screen for suitable pictures. John got up and walked over to it as Tali turned it on.

"I didn't know you liked fireplaces," he said.

"I didn't know I liked them either," she said. "I've never had one before. I've never even seen one before. You don't have them on the fleet."

"Yeah, burn oxygen," he mused.

They walked around behind the fireplace and found themselves in a little lounge room which had a wet bar on one side, and a wide screen TV and long couch.

"Yahn," offered Tali. "We have to have our friends over, this is too much for us, we have to share."

"We could," agreed John. "But understand Tali, the more friends we have over, and the more often we have them, the longer it will take for you to acclimate to the place."

"I don't care Yahn," she said. "I can't just sit here in this luxury, while so many people are suffering. We are going to have our friends over. If we keep the door to the bedroom closed, I'll at least have that."

He wasn't going to argue with that. She very much had a point. It was after all this thought for others that had caused him to fall in love with her in the first place. But at the same time, he wanted to make sure she didn't get annoyed in a few weeks because she was taking so long to acclimate. If she got upset, she would take it out on him.

In the mean time, she was getting more and more excited as she explored the place. She was off to the kitchen and the dining area and then . . .

"YAHN! See This Bath! I've never seen a tub like this before! We could all get in, Me, You, Garrus, Liara, Yoker, EDI . . ."

"We could," replied John. "But I don't see that happening in the real John Tali world."

"Well no," she giggled, her eyes shifting to a slight pink beneath the visor. "But you know what I mean."

"Well usually but seriously girl we've not yet been married a year, you are still full of surprises, case in point the beach. I did not see that one coming at all."

"Well," she said with a coy flirt in her voice. "I like to keep you guessing. But . . . Look at this bed."

"It's a big one that's for sure," agreed John. "I hope it's big enough that I don't push you out of it."

"Yahn," she said silently. "It's okay. I didn't know about the nightmares."

She walked over and give him a hug.

"Let's see upstairs." And with that she dashed out the bedroom exit and up a flight of stairs which led to the second story, which overlooked the living room. Upstairs were two more bedrooms, another bath with walk in shower, and a lounge with another smaller dry bar and a game table with a genuine green flannel covering inset.

"We can have people over for the night. We can have parties. Yahn!" she said. "This is going to be so much fun."

John watched her for a moment, as she methodically walked over the entire apartment again, looking at all the details, pausing mostly at the kitchen.

"Yahn?" she said. "This is big enough that we can both cook in it together. Fix our own meals."

"Yeah," agreed John. "We could. I was thinking about that. Let's sit down and plan our meals together. If we can find ways of making the same dish, both dextro and levo, we can shop more sensibly."

Tali nodded. And so the two of them sat at the dining table and began to make lists. It took longer than they had anticipated. Tali had started to plan meals while she was on the fleet, but John had never done so for he had been in the military since he had moved out of his parent's home.

The shopping experience was another first for them. The store was just a couple of blocks down the walkway and so they were able to secure some bags to carry the groceries in. They quickly realized they couldn't carry everything at once if they purchased it all, so they had to redo their list at the store, which led to a few tense moments as they argued it out. But in the end, they figured out a pasta dish which they could both make, got the ingredients for that, and breakfast supplies, and headed back for the apartment.

Then came their first adventure in the kitchen. They got out their respective pastas, their respective vegetables, their respective sauces, and started to work out the meal. Spoons got mixed up, ingredients got confused. A bowl got dropped and broken, but they managed to get a meal together. As expected, there was some taste testing of each others dishes, but Tali found his food bland or tart, and he found her food horribly sweet. They set the table. John put a candle in the middle and lit it. Tali thought it was a waste of resources since there were lights already in operation. So John turned off the lights and then Tali agreed that the candle was sufficient and burning less energy than the lights. Then she began to speculate that they would be able to save way more energy if they just used candles for the night cycle and John spent a few minutes explaining that humans found candlelight dinners romantic. Tali thought he was sweet then and quite forgot the idea of employing exclusively candles for illumination during the Citadel night cycles.

Then there was the dish washing. There was a dishwasher, but Tali immediately objected on the grounds that the sink and washcloth would use less water and soap. John realized this would be a very silly basis for another domestic dispute and so yielded (for the hundredth time he presumed) then she methodically washed each dish. And methodically was an understatement. She seemed to be able to examine each and every single ceramic ripple and bubble in the glaze, however microscopic and tried to clean them as well. So John stood there for up to a half a minute between dishes waiting with his dish towel to dry. He briefly considered offering to switch but it dawned on him that she would see the dirt anyway and probably hand them back to him. So he waited, and sighed on occasion. And she wondered why he was so irritable.

Eventually, the dishes were put away. John calmed down, found a couple of jokes to make about things to get her giggling, and things got nice again.

Then they stared at each other for a moment.

When you work on a spaceship, it's easy to keep working for eighteen hours. You can then sleep for six or more if necessary. But for the first time since either of them could remember, there was forced idleness. Now there's an old joke about newlyweds, namely that there are two things that newlyweds can resort to when they are left without anything else to do, and most of them don't play cards. This was not an option. Tali was back in her suit and according to the new acclimation schedule, based on Mordin's omni-tool app, she would be at one hour of no hood and gloves and boots. Suit would remain firmly on.

"Well, do you have any ideas what we can do for the rest of the evening?" asked John.

"I'm as free as the dust on the solar wind," she opined.

"Tali?"

"You remember that line. From Fleet and Flotilla? Shalei and Bellicus on the balcony?"

"No Tali I don't. I don't think I've ever seen that . . . vid," admitted John. From what he had heard it was a romance which translated chick flick and he simply did not care to see romances.

"What? You've never? How could you not have? Well . . ." she announced with a great deal of huff in her voice. "I know what we're doing tonight."

And so, John found himself watching a chick flick with his wife. It was the story of a Quarian girl who had fallen in love with a Turnian agent of some sort and naturally all sorts of things were conspiring to keep them apart. Just the same, something about the Vid began to bug John. But it was clear that Tali was utterly mesmerized by it.

"You watched this a lot? About the lovers from two different worlds?" He asked.

"Every time my friends and I had a sleepover," she answered. "We memorized the lyrics from the musical. Oh! We can activate sing along mode!"

Something in the movie about to happen must have triggered a memory in her. She stood up and took his hands, and pulled him up. And then with the vid soundtrack swelling in volume and intensity, she began to sing her heart out to him. He suddenly realized that this was the first time he had heard her sing since that first night on the Normandy when Liara had joined them. This was not a shy hesitant voice either. It was not the voice of a girl who had been put on the spot and tricked into singing. She was putting her entire heart and soul into these lyrics. It was that curious mixture of sweet and cute that expressed such a heart felt love that he couldn't help but be moved by it. And she was likewise trying to sound so broad and romantic, and because she had no vocal training, it was coming off totally schmaltzy. And it didn't matter a whit, he loved her for it.

_"Let the moon's shinning light,_  
_Hide two lovers with it's rays,_  
_Though I know that dawn will set,_  
_Us on course for separate ways,_

_I will hold this night, in memory,_  
_For all my living days._  
_Now unmasked I feel your skin,_  
_On Miiiiiiiine!"_

And she squeaked at the end of it, unable to maintain the vocal chords at the intensity which she was trying to achieve.

"I had no idea you were so into this," he observed after a moment of silence trying to deal with the curious play of emotions that was going through him.

"This vid FTL yumped me into puberty," she said. "And who doesn't love a good cross species romance?"

"I want you to see behind this mask," said the breathless Shalei on the balcony in the Vid. "I want you to see who I truly am!"

"I already have," came the smooth loving voice of Bellicus. And he reached up and removed the mask of Shalei.

"Works for me," suggested Tali. And John reached up and removed her mask and they spent the rest of time kissing for the most part, when Tali wasn't looking into his eyes and reciting Shalei's love lines to him from the vid.

It wasn't a bad way to watch a chick flick.

The hour Tali got out of her mask was over. They were in bed, holding each other. John looked out the open door of the bedroom and saw the sky-cars flashing by. It reminded him of his grandparent's house on his dad's side. They had lived in a small town in Maine, along a busy highway, and he would watch the headlights of the vehicles flash across the wall as he lay in his bed, trying to sleep at their house. That village had always been a magical place for him, and both grandparents were dead by the time he was 18. It had been a sad thing, to leave that house behind forever. There had been an illusion of security and safety. Something which said everything was going to be fine.

"I've been thinking about that vid, Tali," he said.

"And?"

"It explains a lot why you ended up falling in love with me. What makes me wonder is why you didn't go for Garrus, given that this vid is about a Quarian and Turian."

Tali remained silent for a second.

"My first impression of Garrus was that he was yust like the Turian that had yust tried to kill me, and he was yust like the Turian who had treated me rudely yust a few days before. I didn't like Turians then. None of them were like Bellicus."

"What about now?"

"Yahn . . . I love you. Why would I even consider someone else? You're my bond-mate . . . The one that makes me think I'm floating into the sky when we make love. I like Garrus, but leave you for him? That's yust silly."

"You are such a fascinating girl," mused John. He kept having a hard time understanding the depth of bond which existed in Quarian psychology. Little questions like this helped him get his head around it. She didn't even seem to be able to consider the possibility in the abstract. The whole idea simply struck her as absurd. And what's more, he clearly remembered when she could consider the possibility.

"I'm glad you like me," she said.

"Like?" chuckled John. "That doesn't even begin to cover it. Why do you like that Vid so much."

"Why wouldn't I?" she asked. "It's such a romantic vid."

"Oh yes it is," agreed John. "And I can't help but wonder if your love for this vid in some fashion enabled you to fall in love with me."

Tali was quiet for a moment.

"It might have," she concluded.

"But that song . . . How deeply have you thought about that?"

"Yahn? That's the sort of question you ask me before you start to mock something, and you're NOT going to mock Fleet and Flotilla."

"I'm not going to mock Fleet and Flotilla," responded John. "But I am going to critique it. And I think I know you well enough that you'll agree with me when I'm done."

"Alright," she said. "Just remember . . ."

"You have a fist," interrupted John.

"Two fists," replied Tali.

"Okay," said John. "Now, let's look at the first line of that cute love song you so preciously sang to me and made me feel so special when you sang it."

"You liked it?"

"I loved you singing it," he replied.

Tali got silent for a moment. It was clear she was trying to figure out why he had said it the way he said it.

"Let the moon's shinning light, hide two lovers with it's rays," he continued. "What do you think about that. Nice imagery?"

"Sugyests intimacy," she mused, snuggling up to him a bit. It wasn't that she was already next to him, but it was one of those 'adjust my body to fit more snugly with yours since we've kind of slid about in the past fifteen minutes and besides, it's a nice way of telling you that I love you' moves.

"Let's make love under the moon tonight," he continued. "You agree that is what that line is suggesting."

"Could be, but it is after all, Shalei and Bellicus. She can't get out of her suit. In fact, did you know the actress who played Shalei was sick for three weeks after she filmed that scene where he removes her mask on the balcony?"

"Three weeks?" groaned John. "Talk about sacrifices for your career."

"And our risks?" retorted Tali.

"Okay, you got a point," conceded John. "Anyway, let my critique continue . . ."

"With the understanding that there are two fists prepared," suggested Tali.

John gently guided his left hand to clasp Tali's right hand. He then proceeded to guide it to his lips where he gently kissed it.

"One," he corrected. I've got the other one incapacitated now."

"You beast," giggled Tali. "It's yust laying there utterly enraptured by the passion of your kiss."

"Though I know that dawn will set us on course for separate ways," John continued. "Do you remember the end of shore leave on the Citadel before you left for the Migrant fleet?"

Tali was silent for a moment.

"I had a great pilgrimagh gift," she said with a sigh. "I was going home. I'd see my friends and family again. It should have been the most exciting time in my life. And I was so sad. I stood by the window and watched you watch me sail away and all I could do was find a seat and sit down and be miserable for the entire afternoon. And then I got into my ship bunk and yust lay there feeling so alone. I would fall asleep, wake up and reach for you and you wouldn't be there and I'd be reminded that you and I had left and . . ."

"Totally worth it?" asked John.

"No," she said. "Especially when I find out you're dead right after I get that last letter from you telling me how much you wanted to hold me again."

She gently guided his chin with her hand so that he would face her.

"Yahn? Would you think it horrible of me if I said that after your death, part of me was wishing I had never fallen in love with you?"

"Not really," replied John. "It wasn't exactly the nicest way to end a budding romance now was it?"

"Of course the other part of me was holding on to those few nights we had together, trying to hold on to the sweet so that the bitter would not be so overwhelming. But the grief was hard."

"So," said John. "What do those lyrics say in summation?"

Tali paused for a moment

"Let's make love tonight, even though tomorrow we're going to be separated forever, we'll have the sweet memory of it for the rest of our lives."

"Smart move for a Quarian girl?"

"Not really," sighed Tali. "She'll be bound to him too deeply . . ."

"And is Bellicus going to let her get away with it?"

"Yes," sighed Tali.

"Seems to me that Shalei deserves someone better," suggested John.

"But she can't have you!" snapped Tali.

"Did I ever tell you that I love it when you're territorial and complimentary at the same time?"

"Not enough," replied Tali. "You can never tell me that you love me enough."

"Ah the demands the woman places upon the relationship," groaned John.

"I don't demand that much," teased Tali. "Yust perfection."

John just smiled and squeezed her a little more tightly while she snuggled up to him a bit more closely and in a moment she began to heelrou. He remained relaxed and got into a drowsy state that caused him to drift into and out of sleep. Then he was awake again, and Tali was asleep. He was thinking. And this was the perfect time to start to put those thoughts into action.

He quietly slipped out of the bed, and went up to the second floor office, and turned on his holographic piano. He didn't want her hearing him learning that tune and the piano downstairs was just too close to the bedroom. Problem was that while he was somewhat competent playing it he had not reached a state of familiarity that enabled him to come up with a decent enough sounding arrangement. So he did a search on his omni-tool, finally found an arrangement which he thought would work. He ordered it, and shortly it was downloaded and installed on the holographic piano.

It was a nice arrangement, the basic theme was played out in a dramatic rendition, then in a relaxed and quiet style, and then concluded with an epic style at the end. He experimented a bit and found he could easily work the transitions. He looked at the time. It was still 0300 hours. Tali would not wake up for at least two more hours. He had been at the piano working on this arrangement a good ninety minutes. It would need a bit more polish in order to make it do what he wanted, but it was a good start. The tricky part was coming next, but he needed to get back to bed. If he got out of bed before Tali, she would simply get up and start her morning preparations. If he were in bed with her, she liked to wake him up.

Over the next few days, they fell into a routine which was mostly the sort of routine only two young people with leisure can happen to have. They got up, had breakfast, cooking it together, made out a list of things they would need to get for lunch and dinner, went grocery shopping, put that stuff in the fridge, and then tried to find something else to do to fill up the hours. Within a matter of a few days they were at their wits end with boredom. There was only so many places to see on the citadel that they were interested in, and all of them cost money, and John did not want to throw away all the extra credits he had acquired during the Cerberus missions, and Tali was more than in agreement with this.

So Tali invited EDI over for tea during the time she could have her helmet off. Since EDI was an AI, Tali did not have to worry about serious allergic reactions to her. It was one of those face palm moments, but it was not realized before EDI had left. EDI showed up, sat down noted the pot of tea and the two cups with cream and sugar. Poured herself a cup of tea, pantomimed Tali's actions with the cup of tea and the two talked all afternoon. EDI informed Tali at the end of it that she enjoyed herself immensely and asked Tali if she could come back over in a couple of days because she wanted to do something special for Joker's birthday and could use the advice. Tali told her it would be wonderful and EDI left.

John in the meantime was up at his desk, taking advantage of Tali's preoccupation to attempt the writing of poetry, working out lists of rhyming words such as bright, delight, excite, fright, height, kite, light, might, right, sight, slight, tight, and wight.

Then he came down.

"So how was tea?"

"I don't know," fretted Tali. "She never even finished her first cup. Am I that bad a cook?"

"Tali?" said John smiling. "You are such a brilliant engineering geek, I must confess I was amazed and astounded that you invited her over to tea?"

"Why not Yahn?

"EDI is an AI, she's all plastic, silicon, copper, circuitry, and metal. She gets her energy from a plug in the wall. Not a cup of tea."

"Oh Keelah!"

And that was when the face palm happened.

Two days later, EDI came over again, only this time it wasn't for tea, it was for a excursion through the Citadel wards. Given the dangers of having an 'unleashed' AI running about in the Citadel, and given that in her helmet, Tali was just another Quarian thief, Liara was needed to make the trip something which would not end up in the C-sec Gazette.

They met at the apartment for the trip, EDI was bringing in a box.

"I wish to experience an afternoon of acquiring material possessions for our associates," explained EDI.

"You mean you want to go shopping," suggested Liara.

"Do you have a place in mind?" asked Tali.

John, upon hearing the words shopping and where to, walked over, gave Tali a hug and bump on the helmet, and headed upstairs to his desk.

"Is Commander Shepherd not coming on this acquisition run?" queried EDI.

"Men are allergic to women's shopping sprees," explained John.

"Commander I have gone through my protocols and can find nothing in my data banks which suggests that a shopping expedition with a woman would produce a severe allergic . . . Oh . . . It was a joke."

"Do you have a place in mind?" asked Tali.

"Physical proximity is unnecessary," observed EDI. "The extranet provides a greater variety of services while retaining entertainment value. Jeff has lent me his credit chit on the condition that enjoy myself and quote, 'live it up like a girly-girl'."

"But unless you are able to handle the product," argued Tali. "You won't know for sure it's worth the price. You can't see the micro-circuitry from the picture. Or the thread count, or any other important details that determine quality."

"Wait a moment," said Liara giving her head a shake of disbelief. "EDI don't you have any money of your own?"

"I am not formally employed. I have no legal standing in Citadel space. I could turn to a life of crime, but that would look bad on a resume."

"Depends on the resume," interjected Liara. Then she held up her hands and shook her head. "Never mind, wrong time to reference that."

EDI seemed to pause for a second. "Oh, yes, that would be an asset on that kind of resume," she said.

Liara sighed.

"I'll talk to Yahn about it EDI, and we'll see about getting you your own funds. You're part of the team now after all," suggested Tali. "So what's first?"

"I believe Jeff would be both surprised and pleased if I got him a gift. What would you recommend?"

Liara and Tali looked at each other.

"It's his money," observed Liara. "So it should be something you both enjoy."

"What do you do together?" asked Tali.

"We interact most closely when we are flying," answered EDI. "It occurs to me that he does not have a sky-car for traveling around the Presidium."

She pulled up a data pad.

"The 2187 Blackout has a top speed of 650 kilometers an hour making it the most powerful sports sky-car in it's class," began EDI.

"What!" shouted John coming back downstairs. "Are you girls shopping for sky-cars?"

The three women looked at him.

"I'm coming after all," he opined. "It takes a guy to pick a sports sky-car."

"Oh?" challenged Liara.

"Yes," replied John responding with his own challenging glance to Liara. "And besides, it's fun to test drive sky-cars."

"Test drive?" enquired EDI.

"Yes," replied John. "You can't test drive a sky-car on the extranet."

"I am sure there are sufficient simulations . . ."

"Insufficient," argued John. "Let's go."

And the four of them departed for the rest of the afternoon. They did not buy one. John and Liara and Tali all agreed that it would be a bad idea for EDI to bankrupt Joker. But what they did do was help EDI rent a nice sports sky-car for a few days of jaunting around. Joker was thrilled when they drove up to his hotel. And he and EDI drove off in the vehicle. And then John, Liara, and Tali found a nice little cafe for a light supper, invited Garrus to join them, and chatted for the next few hours.

On the 2nd of October, Samantha came over for a game of Chess with Tali. She had discovered that Tali did not know the game and was determined to teach it to her. John, who found chess horribly boring, sent a "Help I'm about to be subjected to a Samantha Tali game of dull chess all afternoon" message to Garrus and Garrus, being the real trooper and big brother sort of Turian, promptly showed up five minutes after Samantha had arrived and asked if John could come out to play.

Tali, who found Garrus' request rather amusing, informed Garrus that John could only come if he promised to not get into any firefights with those mean Blue Sun mercenaries while they were out. Garrus assured her that the only mean bullies who were about were Cerberus and they had just heard he was out and about and C-sec reported they were running and screaming like little girls for the docks.

"Oh, okay," said Tali. "But you have to stay away from the docks then. You know how much John likes to get into fights with Cerberus and then he comes home all bruised and messy and cranky and well, he's not fun to cuddle with then."

"I assure you Tali," swore Garrus raising his right hand. "I will not bring a cranky Commander home to you. Drunker than a Vorcha locked in a beer brewery possibly, but not cranky."

Tali's head tilted slightly and she leaned against the door post with one hand.

"Yahn?"

"I'll be good I promise," John swore.

And the two of them shot out.

"You really know how to cause domestic disputes," joked John as they smoothly flew along.

"Well just part of the services a good flank sniper renders to his commander. It worked out perfectly anyway. Liara is busy gathering up new contacts given that all her old contacts are dead . . . Reapers . . . And so I have the afternoon free."

"The Reapers," groaned John. "You can't escape them can you?"

"Not a bit," replied Garrus. "It's really hard not forgetting them right now on the Citadel. Look at this? We're driving down the Presidium, under a faked morning skyline. The traffic is mid-morning intensity, not at all the rush at the beginning of the day. Just shoppers and business lunches and conferences and meetings. You would never think that our mutual home worlds are burning, along with numerous colonies as well. But what really burns me most? The fact that if it hadn't been for us, these people would all be Reaper processed goo in a manufacturing tube. Which is in part why," and here he lifted the car up above the designated traffic line, "we're going to break a regulation I had to enforce at C-sec."

The sky-car landed on top of one of the pedestrian walk ways which crossed over the traffic. Garrus and John got out. There was no railing on the edge, just a gently slopping roof, so if they got too close, they would slip and fall into the water below, four stories down. There was just a bit of edge to the adventure they were embarking upon.

"Jumping into the water from here?" queried John.

"You haven't seen Turians swim, Commander," replied Garrus. "It's a process which involves a lot of flailing and splashing with intermittent moments of drowning. I was thinking of something else."

And then Garrus opened the trunk and pulled out their respective sniper rifles.

"Now Garrus, I think we've talked about shooting drivers going too fast before," suggested John with a smile.

"Jaywalkers are my thing now," explained Garrus handing John's rifle to him. "Speeders are too easy to kill. Though the multiple car collisions do add some variety to the sudden death from behind atmosphere I work so hard at generating."

"I can see," mused John grinning. "The nearest jaywalker could be over 500 yards away."

"My point exactly," replied Garrus. "Much more of a challenge. But today we're going to take it easy."

"We are? How so? Are we just shooting the fuel tanks of the red veranda models so they explode?"

"No, we're shooting the most criminal class of scum that the citadel can provide. Every where you look you can see them, laying in wait in the corners, occupying your favorite table at the bar."

He pulled out a large box and inside were dozens of old drink bottles.

"Ah yes, death is too good for them," agreed John.

"The rules are simple," explained Garrus flipping on his Hud wire. "I toss, you shoot, then you toss and I shoot. Until you miss which makes me the winner."

"What if you miss first?" queried John.

"Commander you know I don't miss," replied Garrus. "The contest is to see how long you can hold out before you miss."

"Okay," chuckled John. He had no illusions that barring something very disturbing, Garrus would win this contest. But he had no intentions of making it easy. "Here's the deal, I hit the first 21, you buy the next round. I don't, I buy the next round. But if you miss first? You owe me and Tali a bottle of Muskwin."

"I like my brandy and water stirred, not shaken," advised Garrus.

"Duly noted," replied John. "Not that you'll be having it."

"Well in spite of that little jab, I think I'll make the first one easy," replied Garrus. He gently tossed the bottle up and forward. John tracked it and shot. The bottle exploded mid flight. He smiled. Back in earlier days, any flying bullet from the gun would have traveled and eventually come down somewhere. But thanks to the new computer tracking software of the modern guns, coupled with the mass effect power of shaping the bullet so that only enough metal was employed to hit the target, the bullets they fired would swiftly loose speed since they were only a millimeter in diameter. The Mass Effect velocities would ensure that the bottle would shatter. But something that size lost velocity fast due to it's lightness and the impact of the atmosphere on it. What they were doing was fairly safe, but just the same, C-spec would be upset of some driver spied them shooting in their rear view mirror.

"Not bad," mused Garrus. "Don't be shy now."

"Only courteous since we're gentlemen here," suggested John, who likewise threw a bottle up nice and easy.

Garrus tracked, aimed, and then shot off the top, then the bottom, and then hit what was left mid center.

"You can call me a showoff if you like," he suggested.

And then the contest began in earnest. Garrus did not spare John in the least, but John did his best. The two did not talk much, they were determined to win the best they could. But when it came down to it, John simply was not trained in the Sniper Rifle while it was the weapon Garrus was exclusively using. On the 16th toss, John missed. They shot the rest of the bottles up, got back into their skycar, and whizzed over to "Sean's Pub" where they found a nice booth to have a few and watch the pedestrians walk by the water park outside.

"So how is it with you and Liara?" queried John.

"It's been a nice diversion," replied Garrus.

"Diversion?" inquired John.

"Given everything else," retorted Garrus. "Don't get worried now. We're both busy people, though Liara is more busy right now than I am so we don't get to see each other as much as we would like. But if you don't think there is a mutual exchange of feelings, then I can assure you I care for her. Problem is she's way to self-sufficient for me to feel entirely in charge."

"Smart girl," agreed John. "Which was why I let her join us back when. But . . . Well I'll be frank Garrus. I don't think we're in charge when it comes to relationships. Tali pretty much sets the pace at the apartment as well. The only time I know I am in charge is when something is shooting at us."

"Perhaps," replied Garrus. "But Turian women are a bit more service oriented I think. But I suppose this is what you get when you allow yourself to be wooed by a mono-gendered Asari."

"I don't know of any relationship which doesn't have issues," speculated John. "Tali's allergies for example. And her incredible vision. Dish washing is an entirely new experience for me."

"If you will allow me," suggested Garrus smiling. "You open the dishwasher, put in the . . ."

"Waste of resources," quipped John.

"Spirits, you're turning into a Quarian, stop it!" joked Garrus.

"I can't help it!" moaned John. "It was either do it with sink, washcloth, and towel or get into an argument."

"Okay, so you fill the sink with water, put a little soap into the water," continued Garrus.

"You don't understand," laughed John. "Her eyesight! She can see dirt at a microscopic level!"

Garrus pondered that for a moment.

"That's scary," he mused. "I have this picture of you holding a damp towel, waiting for her to finish a spoon."

"Your detective capabilities are," said John. "Once again, superb."

"Okay so dishwashing is a burden, how long do you think it will be before you can persuade her that the dishwasher is a good thing."

"Dunno," answered John. "But even so, there are so many wonderful things about it. Like the fact that I can completely trust her."

"Quarian bonding," observed Garrus. "Heard about it in theory, what is it like in fact."

"She is simply incapable of even imagining being with someone else at this point," explained John. "You remember the gag about that Quarian Vid character where Hai ran off with your heat sinks?"

"Yeah, that Raal something," agreed Garrus, "And we teased the hell out of you suggesting she should go for him."

"And she got into it, remember?"

"Yeah, good chuckle just before we find out that the Collectors have kidnapped the entire crew."

"Today, she can't do that. It strikes her as completely absurd."

"You can't be serious, she can't even imagine having someone else?"

"She doesn't even see you and she together. Thought it was . . ." and here he made quote marks as well as trying to imitate her accent, "Yust silly."

Garrus almost jumped in amazement.

"Not even me?" he asked in a completely baffled voice.

"Not even you," said John with a grin.

"Well that's a deep bonding," he mused. "Spirits, to be able to trust your wife so completely. That's a really nice situation. And to be frank it's kind of a relief. She's a dear friend and we have a lot in common, to know that she can't even be tempted by me . . . Which I admit is a strange attitude for me to have, after all, I'm supposed to be tempting . . . It really takes a certain amount of pressure off of me to be careful that I'm not misunderstood."

"Yeah," sighed John. "I mean granted Tali would find any advances by Samantha extremely unnerving, but I don't have to worry even if Samantha were a really good looking guy."

"At the same time," said Garrus leaning forward. "You had better be careful. Because she finds cheating on you such an absurd concept, she probably has a much more trusting view of you as a consequence. It means you could get away with cheating more easily. I'm not so worried about you trusting her, I worry more about her trusting you."

"Not going to happen, Garrus," snapped John.

"Never say never, Commander. In my experience the guys who think they'll never cheat on their wives are the first to succumb to the predator women. And Commander? You are a celebrity, and there is a lot of bigotry against Quarians. I can almost guarantee that some woman is going to come along and say to herself, 'He deserves better than a suit rat. And that better is me'."

John's first impulse was to laugh at the absurdity of it all. But then he began to think. This was Garrus, former cop in C-sec, the sort who had seen the worst the galaxy had to offer. He knew that all Quarians were not thieves, but he knew those few who were. He knew that not all Volus were cheats, but he knew those few who were. He knew that not all Asari were tramps, but he knew those few that were. He trusted John, even though humans had a reputation for being treacherous. But he likewise knew those humans who were not to be trusted. He wouldn't be telling John this if he didn't think it was a genuine risk. He didn't warn John about pickpockets, no pickpocket in their right mind tried to rip off a man in armor with a pistol on his belt. But he did warn John, just this afternoon, that there were Cerberus agents on the Citadel, specifically in the docks.

"You know Garrus, I was very tempted to tell you that you are totally off your chump. But you're too good a friend to be giving me a load of bull. I'll be careful. The thought that I could betray Tali seems entirely alien to me right now, but let's say that the Reapers are defeated in six months, and we're the heroes who did it? There will be women who will be targeting me just to say they slept with me. Any one of my associates could set up an assignation without my express knowledge. All I have to do is complain about how Tali does laundry and there's a naked woman waiting for me in my hotel room."

"Celebrity status is fun until you see the other side of it. Then it sucks."

John nodded.

"You know, there's a Turian woman giving you eyes, and has been for the last fifteen minutes," he said, tilting his head to the side as if gesturing towards another spot in the bar.

"My point exactly. You could easily have introduced us if I had been complaining about Liara. And under the right circumstances? I'd be over there saying, 'Hi I'm Garrus Vakarian and I would love to share a drink with you.'"

John nodded. "Tell you what, if you keep me on the straight and narrow with Tali, I'll keep you on the straight and narrow with Liara."

"Deal," he said.

The two of them toasted the good things of life, finished their drinks, and headed home.

John got back and found Tali and Samantha hunched over a chess board. He walked up and leaned down to give her a hug and she promptly held up a hand as if to say "Do not disturb at all." All while she was staring at the board.

He looked at Samantha. She too was completely enraptured in the board.

It was so silent you could hear a pin drop.

He was so horribly tempted to sit at the Grand Piano and start playing polkas.

But it dawned on him that he could go up to his upstairs desk and work on that little poem he had started to write a few days prior. So he slipped away to his desk. Twenty minutes later he heard Samantha say "Check mate" and Tali shriek.

"Good game," suggested Samantha. "You catch on quick."

"Keelah you're yust saying that," argued Tali.

"Seriously Tali," continued Samantha. "I normally mate in fifty moves. Our first game was seventy two moves and this one was eighty four moves. So you figured out two of my gambits and thwarted them between our first and second games. You're a good player. I'd love to do this again. And maybe we could spend an afternoon after lunch at the Castle Arcade?"

"Samantha, why go there and spend money to play games when you can come here and we can play games on our omni-tools?"

"But this is your home . . ."

"And I want to share it, so let's set another time okay?"

"Okay on one condition," she said.

"What's that?"

"I want to try out that hot tube you have in the downstairs bath."

"Okay on one condition," replied Tali.

"And that is?"

"In shorts and thick T-shirt. I don't want Yahn distracted by your body."

"So me and Kelly Chambers naked . . ."

"Is out," finished Tali.

Samantha sighed. "You drive a hard bargain. But it will be nice to game here. It's quieter and it's free. Okay you have a deal."

And she left with Tali seeing her out. John slipped all his scrap paper scribbles and notes into a drawer and headed down stairs.

"So you played two games?" he said.

Tali nodded.

"She's a nice girl, quite capable gamer too. Could be fun. Could also creep me out if she got any wrong ideas."

"Good think you're stuck in your suit," joked John.

"Yeah," admitted Tali. "It does keep things only friendly. Not that she's really made any suggestions along those lines. I mean so far it's just girl gamer verses girl gamer. But the push for the hot tube with Kelly"

"A bit of wishful thinking I'm suspecting," mused John. "After all she did get a bit unnerved when we played our little 'let's shack up in as deviant a fashion as possible' game on the Cerberus Normandy."

"And then she offered to be your dancer for our reception," added Tali. "Seems to me that it depends on the circumstances."

"Oh yeah," mused John. "Forgot about that."

"You did?"

"Yeah," answered John.

"I love you," she said. And she proceeded to remove her visor and helmet, and take off her gloves. "I have two hours and twenty minutes tonight, and after that compliment, I think you deserve instant gratification."

And she kissed him for a few moments. And then he simply held her face with his hands and stared into her eyes.

"I want to lose this suit," she sighed.

"I've heard that before," replied John.

"And you know I won't be squealing and hiding under the blankets this time," she reminded him.

"Oh yeah, that's right," he chuckled. "You turned into a little hot tamale after you got promoted. Had I known that, I would have made you a much higher rank after we got married."

"The promotion had nothing to do with it," replied Tali.

"So what did happen? Why, on the Cerberus Normandy, you hid under a blanket, and why since you came back from the Migrant Fleet, you have been naked on the beach before the camera?"

"Well, it's like this," she said for a moment thinking. "First of all, I had a hard time believing you really loved me. I mean sure I was more confidant of our love later than I was sooner, but there was always that fear. It was before we bonded. I did not feel as close to you as I did afterwards. And after we bonded, it was yust habit. Then after being away from you for seven months, I wanted you so bad I yust didn't care. And then by the time we got to Rannoch, all I could think of was how much I loved you, how much I wanted to make love to you and how much you would like to see me, because you had told me how pretty I looked, so I guess it was a bit of confidence, but it was also something intimate that was yust for the two of us. And it was easier that I slipped out of the suit a little at a time. I mean I was ready to make love to you the moment we found that little inlet, but I wasn't really ready to pose naked for you completely until I tossed my shawl."

John seemed to think for a moment.

"Let us say that I had the choice between you without your helmet and gloves for the next two hours, or you naked for the next fifteen minutes, and I asked you to dance naked for me, what would you say?"

Tali giggled and her eyes turned slightly pink.

"Okay," he said. "Now I know."

"You deliberately ask these questions to find out about me don't you?"

"Yes," said John. "It's how I get to know you better."

Tali sighed. "Well you only get me sans helmet and gloves tonight."

"And you're okay with that?"

"It's all I've got so I'll take it. But in a couple of weeks, I am so going to see to it that you nail me to that bed."


	25. Chapter 25 - Shotgun Anniversary

The first week of October was beginning to slip by and little by little, Tali and John were beginning to find a routine which enabled them to work together, and find joy in it. Tali would wake up John in some cute fashion or other. They would make breakfast together, clean up afterwards, plan out lunch and dinner, go to the grocery store, and then come back. From that point on, so much depended on their friends since they were, true to Tali's desire, sharing the apartment with their friends in some fashion. But on the sixth, Javik called John to meet him outside the Castle Arcade. Tali had Samantha over for gaming that day and afterwards, Samantha relaxed in the hot tub while Tali brewed tea. She had found a nice brew which was rather bland to her taste, but she was able to add a dextro sweetener to bring it up to a taste she preferred That way she could serve the same brand to any one of her friends that came over, save Garrus and he only wanted to come over when John was there and he usually brought Liara with him. And while Liara and Tali would have tea, John and Garrus had drinks. Samantha of course had several other games they were able to play, and while Samantha won most of them, a holographic shooter which enabled them to stalk each other around the apartment was easily won by Tali routinely which only intrigued Samantha more.

When John got back, Samantha was toweling herself down and so John retired to the lounge where Tali poured them both a glass of Muskwin, cutting John's glass with water which enabled him to enjoy it more.

"Well," she asked him, removing her helmet and gloves for the evening. "Tell me about this meeting with Yavik. He's been having a hard time dealing with things, did you find a way to bring him out of his shell?"

She pulled her hair brush out of one of her suit pockets and began to brush her hair with it.

"In a way," replied John. "But Tali, you won't believe it. It was like a dream come true. I mean, it was . . . wonderful."

"Then tell me," she exclaimed, pausing in brushing her hair out. "What wonderful thing happened to you?"

John looked at her and grinned. "You ready?"

"YAHN!" She squealed waving the hair brush for emphasis.

"I met Javik and he informed me that he had been asked to appear in this particular function. It had been explained to him that it was a great honor. Well you know how hard it is for him to understand how things happen anymore. He 'slept' for fifty thousand years. So I was more than happy to accompany him to the set."

"The set?"

"Yes, the set. The set for a movie."

"A movie? Someone wanted Yavik to cameo in a movie?"

"Not just any movie, Tali, the Blasto Seven movie."

It was at this point that Samantha came in, informed Tali that she would see herself out, thanked her for the game, and bid a hello to John. John politely talked to her for a moment, asked her if she was showing any mercy to Tali, where upon Samantha talked about the holo shooter for ten minutes and how good Tali was at ambushing her at short range with a shotgun and then all of a sudden her eyes widened as she realized that she was looking at Tali's unmasked face while Tali was brushing her hair.

"Tali!" She gasped. "You are so beautiful, Oh Gawd I had no idea you were so attractive . . . I . . . I . . . I am so jealous of you Commander. Oh . . ."

And she left shaking her hands and arms still jabbering about Tali's beauty.

"She's right you know," observed John. "You are very pretty today."

Tali smiled and nibbled the edge of her bottom lip with her teeth.

"And I'm going to have to stop regaling you for a moment about the Blasto movie while I kiss that sweet mouth of yours and look into those sparkling eyes okay?"

"Well," mused Tali for a moment. "Okay, but Yahn . . ."

"Kisses first, movie later," he opined and then he kept kissing her for the next five minutes until he heard her breathing reach that timbre which suggested she was just starting to feel aroused. He had gotten pretty good at picking up on those signs and was able to stop before she would be frustrated.

"Okay now what was it you wanted to talk about before I fell madly in love with you and had to cover your face with kisses?"

"Yahn? You hate Blasto movies. We go to them to mock them. Why would you want to be in one?"

"Why sit in the theater and mock it when you can be before the camera and mock it directly in front of the entire movie audience?"

"Yahn? What did you and Yavik do?"

John just sat there looking at Tali for a second with a cheesy adolescent grin.

"Yahn!" whined Tali. She was bouncing all over the couch in anticipation, her curiosity and fears both rising to a fever pitch.

"Well," began John. And he paused.

"YAHN!"

"We walked into the set and the director, some Salarian who never told me his name gets all excited because not only do they have a real live Prothean, they have a real live Commander Shepherd. So they inform me that they've got a twofer and put me onto the set and they toss away the actor who was playing me like he was so much garbage. That little lack of courtesy itself was more than sufficient motivation on my part."

He grinned.

"So there we are standing in front of three actors playing the council, the cameras are running, and they are asking me if it was true that I found a genuine Prothean in a refrigerator?"

"Yahn? Are you serious?"

"I swear it's all true," insisted John.

"So what was your answer?"

"I informed them that yes, I had noticed that the potato salad had gone bad and had taken the banana jello desert hostage and while I was busy in the shoot out and working my way, with the team, past the butter, there he was, right behind the roast varren."

"And the director?"

"He thought it was great.

"Yahn, you are so horrible, and I love you," she said before she began to giggle.

"So then the Council asked Javik if he has any words of wisdom for this cycle. And I give Javik a wink, and well you know how smart he is, he picked up on my cues immediately and he proceeded to explain that he was kept frozen in the refrigerator in order to protect the ancient secrets of Prothean cuisine."

"And these were?"

"All the different ways you could serve Salarians, Volus, and Vorcha for dinner."

"Why those three?"

"They were the species of actors playing the council."

"A Vorcha . . . On the council . . ."

"Yes Tali," he said. He couldn't stand it. She was looking so pretty and Samantha's exuberance had merely made her more special. He sat next to her and made it clear that she would have to sit on his lap. Which she readily did and that way he could look right into her face. Of course he had learned to not wince when those hips of hers sunk into the fleshy parts of his thighs. You would have thought that all that padding would have made it a softer experience.

She settled down before saying anything.

"Had it not been a Blasto movie I would have immediately known you were pulling my leg. So what happened next."

"Well enter, stage left, the Hanar actor who is playing Blasto. And he is talking about all the women he's enkindled over the past few months and the Council is complaining about how he shot up the Presidium in the last movie and I suggest that perhaps it's time to shoot it up some more and Javik remarks that Hanar make a good base for a nice fruity desert."

"And? Did you shoot up the set just yet?"

"Not yet . . ." replied John. "You see," and here John made finger quotes, "'Blasto' suddenly realizes that he has a real Commander Shepherd and a real live Prothean in the room with him."

"Which means?"

"He had to find his motivation."

"Which was?"

"To not share top billing," concluded John.

Tali paused and her mouth sort of was left half open. "That was it?"

"I told you the guy takes himself too seriously," replied John. "So naturally I wasn't going to let him get away with that."

"How do you stop something like that?"

"Well I was taught at St. Ignatius when I was a kid and so we put on various dramas and comedies as part of our education. They made us learn all the stage direction stuff and the movies are not that different. So I knew that in order to prevent him from not sharing top billing I had to present myself to the audience in front of him, or in this case, the cameras."

"So . . ."

"It was like a dance."

"Yahn, you can't dance. I love you dearly and realize that I have to kiss you now," And she did, "but you really don't have. . ."

"It's a Blasto movie," argued John. "I don't have to do it well, I only have to do it."

"Oh that's right," giggled Tali.

"So each of us is trying to upstage the other and Javik is walking over to the council and pinching them in the arms to determine freshness. And then . . . The climax!"

"Which was?"

"A three dimensional holo of a Reaper lands by the Council and of course Blasto is supposed to shoot it up."

"Only . . ."

"Not if I can shoot it up first."

"So this is when you and Yavik shot up the set."

"Yep, it was so much fun, you see Tali, they forgot Javik and I had live ammo."

"YAHN!"

"Don't worry, you know how mass effect guns work and once Javik caught on to what I was doing, he knew exactly what to do."

"So you really did shoot up the set."

"Yep, busted lights, riddled props, several explosions, complete chaos."

"And?"

"The director loved it."

"No one was hurt?"

"Only Hanar pride."

"You're horrible," she said giggling. "I can't wait to see it on the silver screen."

"Yep, they're already working on Eight, where Blasto cures the Genophage. I am going to send a letter to Wrex advising him of it and suggesting the sort of Krogan extras they'll be needing to make it a complete disaster."

Tali just looked at him for a second, then she began to giggle, and she didn't stop giggling for a few moments.

"What ever AM I going to do with you?" she asked.

"Hold me, squeeze me, take me home and call me George?" suggested John.

"Yorg? Why Yorg?"

"Old silly cartoon," replied John.

Tali commenced to track it down on the Extranet while John set the table for supper. He knew she had found it when she began to giggle.

The next week passed by quietly. John had finally figured out the Mass times at Our Lady of the Stars and took Tali there on Sunday. The thing that amazed Tali the most was that folks simply looked at her for a moment in a 'what is she doing here, why would a Quarian be interested in this' sort of way and then were perfectly polite and accommodating. Tali listened to the songs which were sung and started to sing along as she figured them out, found the homily a bit dull, remembered to cross her arms when they approached the Priest for the eucharist. She could not have it so she was to receive a blessing which consisted in the Priest putting his hand on her head and saying 'May God Bless You'. Tali found it curious but at the same time, like that one visit on Omega, she noted there was a palpable feeling of calm and peace in the building which she noted was absent from every other building they walked into . . . save the apartment. She wondered about that for a while until she remembered that the cabin in the Cerberus Normandy also felt like that near the end of the Collector's missions and the first few days of the apartment had likewise not felt that way.

"How is it," she asked John after lunch. "That the Church can feel like home the first time you walk into it?"

John shrugged. "I've never noticed it before, but now that you mention it, it does seem to be that way. But I have no idea why."

Liara dropped by that afternoon with Garrus and after a few moments chatting, sat at the piano and played a tune. John then sat down and joined her and they played a duet together while Garrus stood behind Liara and Tali stood behind John. Then John had Tali join him and they played one of the little ditties which Tali could participate in. Liara thought it was cute. Garrus warned John that he was losing his mystique. And John warned Garrus that if he got too involved with Liara, he would suffer the same fate. Garrus responded with mock horror while Liara's expression suggested something along the lines of 'my evil scheme is working'.

Later in the afternoon, Vega and Cortez dropped by to see one of the few football teams play each other. Most of the professional sports teams had been savaged by the Reapers, only a few colonial teams still possessed any sort of integrity and efforts were made by the Alliance to maintain some semblance of normalcy. So two colonial teams whose planets had not yet been attacked by Reapers were playing off. On one hand, you had two professional football teams trying to score goals. On the other hand, no one was rooting for either of them since everyone's favorite teams had been destroyed by the Reapers. The score ended two to one with the favored team winning in the first part of the second half. The guys drank beer, commented on the plays, and had a decent enough time while Tali chatted with Liara over tea. Garrus watched the game with a certain bemusement, thought Turian sports were way more exiting and said so, and then had a rollicking time (in his words) defending his opinion against the rabid football fandom that was James and Steve while John simply drank his beer and watched the three of them go at it.

They then ordered pizza to be delivered while Tali fixed a small pizza for her and Garrus. Then at the dining table, they all noted that Tali's place was set like Garrus' with a set of silverware and plate. And sure enough, when they sat down, Tali removed her helmet and gloves. Garrus had already seen Tali unmasked prior, but for James and Steve, it was a new experience. Garrus complimented Tali in such a manner that Liara did not find threatening while James simply whistled and told John to keep her under lock and key lest some Batarian Bandito run off with her. Naturally Tali smiled.

"How dangerous is this?" asked Garrus looking at Tali.

"The danger is physical contact and foreign particles,' explained Tali. "So long as I don't engage in physical contact with people other than Yahn, I'm okay. So long as I'm staying in this apartment, I can expose my skin to the air a bit more each day. I'll never be able to be completely out of my suit in the Citadel, I put everything on before I leave, and I'll be able to remove everything only briefly at best and really only in controlled conditions."

"Well, it's really nice to be able to look at your face," continued Garrus. "It assures me that you are amused by my witty one liners."

They finished dinner and their friends left. They cleaned up the kitchen and then sat down by the fire place and looked at each other for a moment. Tali's hair was resting upon her shoulders, billowing into curls.

"I recognize that look you're giving me," she observed smiling slightly.

"You do?"

"You used to look at me this way when I was spending several hours out of my helmet on the Cerberus Normandy."

John seemed to think on it for a moment.

"Your face has always been a precious commodity to me. I so seldom get to see it, and so much of your personality is in it's expressions."

She lay back and rested her head in his lap and looked up at him. He gently stroked her hair and head looking down at her.

"Three weeks already," she observed. "They've gone rather fast considering we've spent so much time wondering what we were going to do next."

"Well Samantha's gaming geekyness has given you at least more to do, and I think I'll be joining you girls soon enough."

"Why all of a sudden?"

"She saw your face and was totally enraptured by it. She's like Steven, very much for the moment kind of girl, quick to do something on impulse. EDI observed that she was physically aroused when she would hear EDI talk."

"Are you yealous of Samantha?" asked Tali looking at him directly.

"Tali? You and Samantha as a couple, what's your first impression?" asked John.

Tali stuck her tongue out which John had learned was how Tali expressed annoyance at an idea. He didn't know if this was Tali or Quarians in general, but as Quarians were always in their masks, he suspected this was an expression Tali had come up with on her own.

"Thought so," he said. "So why would I be jealous?"

"Which was why I asked the question. So why are you worried?"

"I'm worried she'll make a pass at you," answered John. "Worried she'll try to kiss you or something because she's so impulsive outside of gaming."

"That's yucky Yahn," suggested Tali.

"But if it happens, we have to remove her from the ship and that would not be the best thing to happen right now. Little events like that tend to be misinterpreted by the crew. Especially when everyone knows she's good at her job."

Tali nodded.

"She is fun to game with. She's really good. But why are you worried all of a sudden?"

"When you were entirely in your suit, I figured she would not be interested. Impulsive people don't like having to plan out things especially things having to do with romance. But once she saw your face, and went into paroxysm's over it, I figured I needed to be a little more present."

"I suppose it's for the best for the time being," sighed Tali. "Oh, Yack has come to the Citadel and I asked her over for tomorrow."

"Oh that will be nice. What's her reason? Wait! Jack!?"

"Her students are going through some more training sessions with mock battle simulators, you know like that Armax?"

"You really mean Jack?"

"What other Yack is there?"

John sighed.

"She's gotten a lot nicer since she started teaching at Grissom," observed Tali.

"Just the same, she's still a time bomb in so many ways," sighed John.

"I just thought of something," speculated Tali.

"You did? Fancy that. Ow!" John rubbed at particular and often bruised spot on his arm.

"Yahn? I swear you deliberately do that on occasion yust because you are amused in some whacky fashion."

"Curses," joked John. "You're on to me. So what was your brilliant idea, Kitten?"

"That's more like it," she agreed with a sweet smile. "I'm going to stay firmly visored around Samantha until she asks when it's coming off again and then I'm going to explain in great detail how hard it is to acclimate and how we couldn't make love for four months after we decided we would bond. That should dampen any . . . Mmmm . . . impulsive thoughts on her part."

John nodded. "Good thinking girl," he said. "Saves me from having to keep my assault rifle locked and loaded at all times."

Tali sighed.

"Why the sigh, girl?"

"Here I am, my head in the lap of my beloved, his hands gently stroking my head and hair, and I can't attack him because I'll get sick."

John was tempted to employ all sorts of wisecracks, along the lines of 'poor baby', or other such but he knew exactly how she felt because there were as many, if not more so, moments when he felt the same way.

"It's what we get for falling in love with each other. If you had been less selfless, I'd have been safe . . . but no . . . You had to be the sweetest most thoughtful girl I had ever met and . . . I was lost."

Tali giggled and then she got into the patter.

"Oh I'm so sorry I was so wonderful . . . And if you had been anything less than a daring rescuer of poor little Quarian girls, I would have been dead and wouldn't have thought twice about falling in love with you. But no, you had to rescue me not once, not twice, but three times and here I am, hopelessly smitten."

"So how's the acclimation going? It seems like you're going faster than I remember."

"It is, I suspect because I have no real reaction to physical contact with you and haven't since our bonding . . ." She paused. "It was what you call October wasn't it?"

Suddenly John did a face palm.

"Tali, it was a year ago. Tonight. We were supposed to bond tonight exactly a year ago."

"It was?"

Then John remembered that Quarians did not have birthdays or anniversaries because of how they measured time.

"Yes," chuckled John. "Today is our wedding anniversary."

"So why do you find that amusing?" she asked.

"Because it's an old Vid trope that the girl remembers the anniversary but the guy does not and it gets him into all sorts of trouble because he didn't remember something so important."

"Oh . . ." Tali paused. "You're not mad at me Yahn are you?"

"Do I look mad?"

"No, but I was worried."

Then Tali began to giggle.

"And Dr. Chakwas had so sedated you that you slept through the entire thing," she tittered.

"I what?"

"I made the most passionate love I could to you and you were completely asleep," she continued covering her mouth somewhat as she continued to giggle.

"My first time with you and I was asleep? It wasn't the next morning like I thought."

"There I was screaming with ecstasy, floating away like I was being lifted by gentle hands of air and you were going 'brrrrzzzz snork brrzzzzz snork'."

John was looking at her completely open mouthed. "I didn't know I could . . ."

"You couldn't!" she giggled. "Your entire body was such a flop it was all I could do to keep from screaming, but not from ecstasy."

John began to laugh. "We have had such a . . . romantic time together haven't we?"

"What hasn't gone wrong?" asked Tali between titters.

"Well!" announced John in a huff. "I know what we're going to do!" He got up and walked upstairs to his desk.

A second later he said, "Tali come up here and take a look at this! Something has finally gone right!"

Tali hopped up the stairs to the second floor office and looked at the omni-screen mail message. It said as follows.

_Hey Commander?_

_I got reservations at Ryuusei's for us tomorrow night (Oct 13) at 1900. Meet you there._

_Joker_

"Did you just arrange this?" asked Tali.

"No," laughed John. "But I was going to try to make reservations at Bullrush. Looks like Joker has pulled off a miracle."

"Yahn! We're going to eat at 'Ryuusei's!" she squealed. She then paused and looked at John. "When I was first on my pilgrimage, and in the Citadel, just before I met you I would stop by there and look at the people inside. And you know what I thought when I was looking at that restaurant all those times? Some day, when I've proven my worth to the Galaxy, I'm going to go in there and have dinner. And now, it's going to happen." She yeeped once again and gave him one of the tightest hugs he had ever experienced from her.

"And you're going to have a very nice Poncho to wear over your suit when you go in," finished John.

"Yahn! I don't need . . ."

"It's important to me Tali. I want everyone to see that this is a very important Quarian coming into the restaurant."

"Yahn! What if they don't have something I can . . ."

"I'm going to take care of that to," replied John. He sighed. "You are such a Tali."

"What?"

"We have just gotten the reservations and you are already worrying."

"Yahn!" she started.

"Tali? Don't you see how nicely this has worked out? We didn't bond on the 12th, like we had planned. It didn't happen until the next morning. Officially our Anniversary could be either today or tomorrow, and tomorrow night, we're going to Ryuusei's. We'll still be able to celebrate one year of marriage. This has worked out so nicely that what could go wrong?"

Tali paused.

"Oh I'm being so silly," she sighed. "You're right of course, I just had this horrible feeling that something crazy was bound to happen. It's gone now. It will be fun. And I promise I won't fret if you take me shopping tomorrow."

The sky-car pulled up and dropped them off at 1903. Tali had suffered a panic attack when she put the new purple with black fringe poncho on and worried that the fringes would catch on her suit. John had to spend a few moments assuring her that she would look fine, put the necklace on her and the two of them set out. John wore his Navy blues with the gold trim and thick bars to indicate his rank. Tali had complimented him on the outfit. She liked him looking military, it made her feel safe.

There was a long line, but in a moment, a waiter came up to them.

"Ah Monsieur," he began. "I was not informed you would have a companion with you."

"How odd," replied Shepherd. "This is Tali'Shepherd. My wife. She comes with me always."

"But of course! But of course!" he replied. "It's . . . You have me at a disadvantage Monsieur Shep'pard. For our establishment, alas, does not serve dextro meals."

John held up his hand.

"Do not trouble yourself. We have taken the liberty of providing my wife with an appropriate dinner for her to enjoy while we dine with our friends."

"Ah, you have shamed me Monsieur, but do not fret. As a complimentary apology for not being able to serve your most gracious and polite wife, I will secure a fine bottle of Muskwin for her enjoyment," he concluded. "Now, if you will follow me to your table."

He led them past the long line, and he noted the stares of resentment that some of the people gave. He also noted that Tali was doing her little head tosses. As they walked through the restaurant, he likewise heard that he was being recognized, as was Tali in some cases.

"You're loving this aren't you," he proffered as they approached Joker's and EDI's table.

"It's . . . nice," she ventured.

"Hey Shepherd," began Joker. "Not bad huh? This sushi place is serious like, French guy at the door serious. Only had to save the galaxy twice to get a table here. Have you seen the line outside?"

John and Tali, who had seen the line, nevertheless were prompted to turn and look once Joker had dropped the cue. It was one of those curious examples of the power of suggestion. They spied at the end of the line a young woman, possibly African or Indian in nationality, jumping around and trying to catch the attention of someone in the restaurant.

"But here I am, drink in hand, with my own girlfriend. Best pilot in the universe, and a Rock Star," continued Joker.

"Any news from the Normandy?" asked John.

"Ah you know, maintenance stuff," answered Joker. "It's hard to know that a bunch of strangers are poking around on my ship."

"I'm keeping an eye on them Jeff," assured EDI. "If they try anything annoying or fresh, I'll let you know."

"Fresh?" asked Tali.

"The Normandy is my body as well Tali," answered EDI.

"Ooooo," replied Tali who then did a little girl giggle which her hand over her face plate entry point.

"The best thing we can do right now, is park her, and let the techs do their work," suggested Shepherd.

"And afterwards, EDI and I will fix what they screwed up in no time," assured Tali reaching over and giving Joker's hand a very light squeeze.

"Yeah, you're right," sighed Joker. "Oil change won't hurt. Maybe rotate the space tires."

"Trust me," replied Shepherd smiling. "It'll do her some good."

"Oh I trust you," replied Joker. "Not sure about those shifty aero-space engineers. Always stealing the silverware."

"And the connection yacks," added Tali. "I swear every time they've been in the Enyineering section my entire supply has been stolen. I packed all of them up before I left for the apartment and had them put in a safety deposit box at the First Citadel Bank."

"I have trained Bytes to electro-shock any engineer who tries to fiddle with my memory banks," added EDI. "Last time they ran off with some of mine and I was suffering from senility regarding energy flow and recirculation for the women's restrooms."

"Bummer," added Joker.

"Well let's let someone else do the work for once," suggested John. "Hackett's orders. You are on shore leave."

"Yeah, whether we like it or not," groaned Joker.

"I'm sure you'll manage," suggested John.

"I may need a drink that comes with an umbrella," suggested Joker looking at his empty glass.

"Hey!" suggested John with a grin. "I'm the first human specter. I'll get you two umbrellas."

"Awesome use of power, boss," replied Joker. "So, you're E-mail said it was important?"

"My E-mail?" queried John. "We're here because you got the reservations."

"The Hell?" answered Joker. "I didn't get these reservations. Didn't even think I could without the Head Waiter laughing in my face and hanging up."

"Commander!" cried a young woman's voice bouncing about in the Restaurant. The foursome, still trying to figure out why they were there if no one had made reservations, all looked towards her. She was dark skinned, the very girl that John had recalled was bouncing about the line a minute earlier. Her hair however was straight which suggested she was from southern India. She was in an Alliance uniform, lieutenant in rank, and holding a data pad. She seemed pretty, but also pretty agitated.

"I don't think that's the umbrella lady," observed Joker.

"Commander Shepherd," said the girl as she reached the table. "I'm staff analyst Myra Brooks . . . Alliance. Excuse me!" And she saluted. "Alliance Intelligence . . .

"If you're the Alliance Intelligence you need to get back to the fleet before they do something stupid," suggested Joker.

EDI tilted her head to ponder it for a moment.

"Very good joke," she suggested. "Now how hard should my laugh be to be appropriate?"

Tali rested her visor on her left hand.

"There are people trying to kill you!" Brooks added.

"Again?" queried Tali. "And during our anniversary dinner?"

"That is correct," confirmed EDI, "exactly 365 days, 13 hours, 37 minutes, and 19 seconds ago, in the cabin of the Captain's quarters of the Normandy, Tali, noting that Commander Shepherd was now awake, pounced upon him and initiated the love making behaviors which established their permanent bond.

John and Tali gently rested their heads upon their fingers while they waited for the blush to receded, while Brooks struggled to maintain a sense of decorum and Joker simply shook his head, grinned, and said, "Don't you ever change EDI."

"No no, I don't mean Cerberus and the Reapers, I mean new people . . . There . . . It's . . ." Brooks took a deep breath. "Someone is hacking your account, comm channels, personal records. They are targeting you specifically."

"Targeting me?" asked John. "What do they want?"

"The intel isn't definitive yet. Last time I guessed without definitive intel, we almost landed troops on a gas giant. Which is bad."

"Hang on Brooks," suggested John. "Take a breath." He waited for her to breathe for a second and then said, "From the top, what do you know?"

"Good evening ladies and gentlemen," came a voice that was filtered through a helmet synthesizer which was attached to a very military looking helmet, which was atop of some very military looking body armor, which was carrying a very nasty looking assault rifle. "Tonight's performance is brought to you by Random Acts of Violence."

And the entire squad of them began to shoot the place up while John tipped their table and got Joker, EDI, and Tali behind it.

"Man I love showtime," continued the voice amid the gunfire and screaming patrons seeking to run.

Almost immediately, Brooks was grabbed and hauled off by the armored mercenaries. John turned to Joker and EDI and Tali.

"I'm going after her, you get the rest of the crew," he argued. Joker and EDI began to slip away. Tali remained.

"Tali!" whispered John.

"This is our anniversary," she argued in a low but firm voice. "I'm spending it with you."

"Quarians don't do anniversary's!" he argued back.

"Hey!" shouted a Mercenary spotting Joker.

John leapt up and knocked the pistol out of the mercenaries' hand and gave him a good solid knock out punch. He had the pistol and was armed. Tali pulled out a shot gun from under her poncho.

"Where did you . . . how? . . ." began John. "Oh never mind."

"Bait!" muttered Joker slipping away with EDI. "He used me as bait!"

John and Tali quickly closed in on where Brooks was down and on the floor, shooting up the mercenaries, but when they reached the spot, more mercenaries opened up and the next thing John knew, Brooks was shot, Tali had leaped behind the bar for cover, and the floor beneath him had broken apart and he was plummeting down the sides of the building.

He spent a good thirty seconds falling before he finally was able to land, mostly banged up, but still with unbroken bones. If one falls down the side of a building, there are ways you can keep yourself from falling too fast to reach terminal velocity.

"Commander Shepherd? Are you okay?" queried Brooks over the Com.

"Peachy," grumbled John. He began to work his way along the edges of the buildings, looking for some place where a sky car could pick him up while various friends and Tali began to call on the Com.

"Yahn!" cried Tali. "Yahn! Where are you?"

"Who is this!" demanded Brooks. "You are on a secure channel and endangering Commander Shepherd."

"I'm his BOND-MATE Brooks!" replied Tali apparently rather put out. "I was sitting at the table with him remember? Who else would call him Yahn and not Commander Shepherd?"

"Oh . . . Yeah!" suggested Brooks as if it were just dawning on her.

"Everyone," groaned John. "Play nice."

"Yahn! Why did you have to yump into that hole? It's four stories down and it's going to take me forever to get to you."

"I didn't . . ." grumbled John. "Never mind, just get to me asap Kitten."

"Kitten? Is that a code name?" asked Brookes.

"Depends on Commander Shepherd's tactical analysis of the situation," suggested Garrus, who apparently had just connected with the Comm Frequency thanks, in no doubt, to Joker's and EDI's rapid alert response. "Code names ranged from Duck, Monkey Duck, Chipmunk, Ducky, and Kitten. Then there's Bugs, Bugsy, or Hot Plates."

"Hot plates?" queried John, who was having a hard time staying annoyed at his pain with that sort of talk going on.

"Liara's code warning of incoming severe physical exertion on my part."

"I heard that Garrus," intruded Liara. "Commander? Joker has alerted everyone. We are all going to converge if we can."

"Hot plates? Liara?" queried Tali with just a bit of tease in her tone.

"I'm not going to talk about it Tali."

"But we're friends," suggested Tali.

"And if you wish it to stay that way, you'll wait for a more appropriate time for discussion . . . Kitten," retorted Liara.

John worked his way to the promenade and then found a means to start to cross it. More mercenaries opened up.

"Yahn! I heard that from here, what's happening?"

"It's all under control Tali," assured John.

"EDI just informed me that it's your anniversary," said James. "Loco? Is this how you celebrate? Holy Frijoles, and I thought my family was into gun fire at celebrations."

"If I had not forgotten until yesterday," replied John, leaping from cover to cover. "I would have ordered more explosions."

"Oh Yahn!" quipped Tali. "You are such a sweetie. But really this has been very nice."

"Well hey, if Sparks is having fun . . ."

Shepherd was busy ducking a steady stream of machine gun fire to answer that one.

"Did I just hear an alarm go off?" asked Garrus. "What is going on now?"

"Just making things more interesting," replied John who had up to that second wondered where that one bullet had flown to.

He reached the sky-car lot, worked his way up to two mercenaries who were busy shooting at where they thought he was, and then saw them being taken out by two shotgun blasts. He came forward and saw Tali, still in her purple poncho and gold necklace, holding her shot gun, sauntering up to him.

"What a romantic date! You know how much gun fire turns me on . . . Getting to hold the warm barrel of a shot gun, it reminds me of something else . . . " she teased. "The landing pad is over there," she motioned. "But it's behind a locked gate."

"Let's look for the control panel," suggested John.

"Did I tell you how nice you look in that uniform?" queried Tali.

John looked at her.

"Control Panel, right," added Tali. "Brooks said you fell, not yumped through that fish tank."

"We'll talk about it later."

"Do you remember when you used to rescue me in the Wards, Yahn?"

"I said we'll talk about it later."

They finally found the door to the manager's office. The door was locked. John informed Tali to stand back and took aim. Tali gently placed her hand on his arm and pushed the pistol down. She leaned over and rapped on the window.

"Hello?" She said. "Could you please open the gate?"

There was a hiss and the gates to the sky-car lot opened.

"Thank you," said Tali.

"Please leave," requested the Volus Sky-car salesman.

"I could have done that," muttered John, knowing that he probably wouldn't have.

They walked out of the lot, saw the C-sec vehicle hover above them, open it's door, and reveal an interior full of mercenaries who opened up with some very nasty automatics. John tackled Tali and rolled behind cover. Then they heard a Krogan scream, a sudden thud of a heavy body landing upon the shuttle, more screams, a few cries of terror, and as John looked out, there was Urdnot Wrex, throwing the last of the mercenaries out the other side of the shuttle.

"Wrex?" asked John, rather incredulous since this was the last person he had expected to see show up. "What are you doing here?"

"Ah, just butting heads with the Council over Krogan expansion," grumbled Wrex as he proceeded to methodically search the bodies remaining. He tossed one of those gatling auto fire guns to John. Then there was an explosion and more Mercs came leaping in from over the Sky-car Lot.

"Shepherd?" shouted Wrex. "Have you got a way out of here?"

"Hey Wrex," replied Shepherd. "I'm a professional."

"That's not a yes, Shepherd!"

"That's not a no," shouted Shepherd.

"Commander?" called Joker over the com. "I've picked up Brooks. Thought you would have some questions.

"Joker? We lost our ride."

"On my way!"

"This is a great place to fight in!" exclaimed Wrex. "Lot's to destroy!"

"Closing in Commander," called Joker. "Just following the sound of the gun fire. Sorry I'm running behind. We had to take the scenic route."

"Scenic route?" screamed Brooks behind Joker's com. "We almost crashed four times! Where the hell did you learn to drive?"

"And Brooks says 'hi'," continued Joker.

They shot their way through the Sky-car lot, filling numerous vehicles with holes, breaking large numbers of windows, and finally were able to leap up into Joker's shuttle and fly away back to the Apartment.


	26. Chapter 26 - Cool Hideouts and Parties

As Wrex, Tali, Brooks, Joker, and John walked into the apartment, Wrex asked if someone would tell him what was going on.

"Who were those mercenaries?" asked Tali. "They were heavily armed and using C-sec shuttles."

"I don't know. I've never seen those type before," replied John.

"I can't believe you survived all that," stammered Brooks. "They had guns, and grenades, and those drone things!"

"It's alright," assured John. "I'm going to call Commander Bailey of C-sec. He's the head, he'll be able to start tracking things down."

"Okay that sounds . . . wait! Wouldn't that make him a target too?" asked Brooks.

"She's right Yahn," agreed Tali. "Until we know what's going on, it is a huge risk."

"Okay, then for now, we run this ourselves," said John.

"Right, ourselves, on our own, outside the law," repeated Brooks. She proceeded to stammer and gesture for a bit.

"Brooks," assured John. "It's okay."

"I got shot!" she exclaimed. "And medi-gelled but still, I took a desk job specifically so I would not get shot! And you killed a hundred guys . . . With a pistol! I mean, who does that . . . Well you . . . But besides you? They said the Medi-gel might make me jumpy so do I seem jumpy?"

"We're not confusing you for a Quarian yet," offered Wrex.

"Emphasis on word yet," added Joker.

"I'm right here Wrex," suggested Tali, slightly miffed.

"Right!" exclaimed Wrex. "I've forgotten my little bucket buddy!"

He walked over and gave Tali a big hug that caused her to make numerous noises of the sort that are made when small delicate organics are squeezed tightly by big indestructible organics.

"So you're Commander Shepherd's mate now!" he exclaimed. "When are we going to see all those little bouncy chirpers in their baby bucket booties?"

"We're working on it Wrex," laughed John. "Believe me when I say no one is working on it harder than we are."

"Right, you have that suit thing to deal with," mused Wrex.

"It's good to see you too Wrex," said Tali. "I've missed you."

"Heh!" replied Wrex.

"Okay Brooks, tell us how you got mixed into this?" John turned to face Brooks as he questioned her.

"I'm in charge of intel which protects officer's accounts," explained Brooks. "Like, when, someone uses an Admiral's pass to get into a nightclub on the citadel when that Admiral is fighting on Tuchanka. I wrote this tracking program - It's really neat - I named it Mr. Biscuits, after my cat. Right! Mr. Biscuits . . . My Program! detected a breach in your classified files, and soon everything you had or were connected to was compromised."

"Since when does hacking personal files involve heavy gunfire?" asked Wrex.

"Think of what criminals could do if they had Shepherd's military access codes? Or Specter codes even?" observed Brooks.

"That explains why they need you dead Shepherd," concluded Wrex. "Then there's nothing to stop them until the damage is done."

"Okay," concluded John. "Let's figure out who they are and shut them down." He paused. "Tali? Wrex? Ideas?"

"Hmm," mused Tali. "What about that pistol you picked up?"

"For such a tiny thing it packs a punch," exclaimed Wrex, obviously admiring it. "I've never seen anything like that before . . . in a pistol that is."

"Let me see it," requested Liara, who had just walked into the Apartment. "I might be able to help. Glyph?"

And her glowing white omni-drone came floating into the room with her and announced that it would begin collating relevant intel for review.

"Liara," nodded John. "Glad you could make it."

"Shepherd," she replied. "I'm relieved to see you in one piece. A shame about Ryuusei's though. It was a favorite."

"I know," sighed John.

"Alright, we have me on point, Shepherd on my left, Tali on my six, and Liara on Right Flank. Where's the rest of the crew?" asked Wrex.

"Yeah," added Joker who was calling behind his shoulder. "Where are the rest of those slackers?"

"Permission to come aboard, Shepherd," asked Garrus, who was walking in with EDI and Kaiden.

"Hey, folks who actually like getting shot at," observed Joker. Then he turned to John. "Okay commander, later? When this is over and everything is settled? We're going to talk about this bait thing."

"Good to see you Liara," added Kaiden. "If anyone has the ability to sift through a mountain of boring stuff and find a clue, it's you."

"How are you doing Tali?" asked Garrus.

Tali sighed. "It's our first year wedding anniversary. We were going to go to Ryuusei's to celebrate. Finally, after all those years of trying to get in there, it was going to happen. And then? He broke their floor."

"Commander," replied Garrus giving Tali a comfort hug. "How could you do that to her? Our little ducky?"

"I know I know," sighed Shepherd. "I'm such a selfish jerk."

"But you're my selfish yerk," offered Tali.

James walked in, made an observation about Wrex being a Krogan bodyguard, and commenced to lean on the counter and wait for something to happen. Then he noticed Brooks.

"She's kind of cute," he observed. "Think she's on the market?"

"I'm going to have to write a report about being shot," Brooks was grumbling. "I hear they are really complicated."

"It's faster if you make a template," suggested John.

"Here Brooks," offered Tali activating her omni-tool. "I'll give you mine. I fill them out all the time."

"I think maybe you all get shot too much," observed Brooks.

"Whoa," observed Cortez walking in. "Glad you all made it out of that ambush okay. No one saw that one coming. But lesson learned. Never have dinner with Joker. It won't end well."

"The attack at Ryuusei's has been reported in the news," observed EDI. "Casualties have been restricted to fish."

"So what was it Tali?" asked Garrus looking over to Shepherd. "Five minutes before Shepherd started getting shot at?"

"Maybe six," sighed Tali. "I did not think to set my omni-tool timer when we walked into the restaurant. I was too busy tossing my head at the people waiting in the line."

"Well that really burns it doesn't it?" added Garrus. "There you are, able to show off for the first time with the Commander and he proceeds to get mercenaries to shoot at him."

"It's so hard Garrus," she said with an exaggerated sigh. "And he has those nose hairs."

"Alright!" shouted John.

"On the other hand," continued Garrus. "We have this cool secret hideout to hang out in. Unless the bad guys look into the windows."

"Commander," suggested Javik who was also now just walking in. "In my cycle, when we fled from combat by falling through tanks containing aquatic animals . . . Oh that's right. We never did employ that sort of retreat maneuver. You are a trail blazer."

John walked over to the dining table where Brooks was seated next to Liara, who was busy going through data.

"ETC?" he asked.

"Good question," she replied.

"Okay gang," announced Shepherd. "Until we confirm our next move? Everyone lives here. Only place off limits is Tali's and my bed and bath. We'll be a little short of bed space, so we'll have one spare bedroom reserved for women, and one for the guys."

"No need to bother," replied Liara. "Garrus will sleep with me."

"You sure?" queried Garrus. "My hot plates won't be a problem?"

"Never mind," sighed John throwing his hands up in the air.

"Yahn are you sure you want to reserve . . ." began Tali.

"Yes!" he said, somewhat snappish. "Sorry Tali," he continued more calm. "We humans will share many things, but not our bedrooms. That is for you and me."

"Loco? Sparks? I'm in charge of breakfast. I make mean eggs," offered James.

Kaiden turned and started to leave. "I'll be back," he said. "I forgot my guitar. We'll be needing it I'm thinking."

"Thanks Kaiden," said Tali. "It's been so long since I've heard you play and sing . . . not since . . ."

"Yeah," sighed Kaiden as he walked out.

"Tali?" queried Garrus. "I suspect we're going to need to get some dextro food for the place. And some . . ."

"I've got most of the basics already Garrus," she answered. "Yahn and I have been planning our meals every day and I've figured most things I'm going to routinely need out. But we will have to get stuff if we're going to be here for a few days. So sure, let's go do that now."

"Garrus?" asked Liara, looking up from the dining table to the two of them in the kitchen. "You shopping with Tali?"

"He's my big brother," observed Tali.

"Don't worry about it, Liara," assured Shepherd. He smiled. "We've bonded remember?"

"Oh!" exclaimed Liara. "Sorry I had not thought of that."

"Looks like you and I are going to have to sit around and drink beer all day," suggested Joker to Cortez.

"I'll still be needed to pilot the shuttles," argued Cortez.

"Well perhaps we'll switch off," suggested Joker.

"Why?" asked Cortez.

"Geeze, I can't just sit around and drink beer by myself. EDI pretends to with me some times but it's not the same. Otherwise I'm just sitting here the whole time."

"If I need relieving," answered Cortez. "I'll let you know."

"Yeah yeah," exclaimed Joker with an exaggerated exhalation of air.

John watched Garrus and Tali exit, and felt a little melancholy for a brief moment. Then it dawned on him that there was something he could work on and promptly sat at the grand piano and began to work on his arrangement for the Fleet and Flotilla love song.

Joker noted that John was playing the piano in public. But did so quietly because he was feeling the stress of the affair washing out and it was a very comfortable couch he was sitting on, way better than the motel room he and EDI were in. So he kicked off his shoes, lay down on the couch, and EDI sat next to him and he held her hand. He did not use her legs as a pillow, they were way to hard and solid for that. Cortez looked at the two of them, shook his head and walked out.

Liara continued to sift through data, but she was finding Brooks hard to work with. It seemed as if Brooks would only supply information when she asked for it and then Brooks would get entirely focused on some trivial piece or other which would take even more time to work through. It was obvious that Brooks regarded caution as important, but Liara found it wearing on her.

James, now bored, tried to wrestle up a poker game on the card table which was in the upstairs lounge. It was cloth lined and sunken which made it perfect for games of chance. Javik informed Vega that in his cycle, Vega would have been executed for suggesting such, Cortez was game, but Joker was asleep and EDI was 'scary' when she played cards. At least according to James because she had the perfect poker face and she never made the same mistake twice.

"We need Samantha," observed Cortez.

"She's on the Normandy keeping the place organized," replied James.

"You know how to play gin?" asked Cortez.

"Never touch the stuff," replied James. "I prefer beer."

"Okay James," said Cortez with a world weary expression. "Let me teach you a new card game for two people."

"Sure," replied James. He tilted his head while Cortez shuffled and dealt. "The Commander is playing his heart out on the keys."

"Yeah," snorted Cortez. "He loves her."

James was tempted to ask Cortez if he was jealous. But decided against it. There wasn't going to be a poker game in the near future and he wanted something to do before he tried doing 100 pull ups on the bathroom bar.

Forty-five minutes later Kaiden came back with his guitar and found John still working on the piano. He pulled out his guitar and the two of them worked out a couple of melodies together before Tali showed up. Then as she and Garrus came in with close to a dozen bags of groceries, John pointed to the sheet music he was folding up, put his finger to his lips so that Kaiden nodded and the two of them quietly wrapped up their jam session.

"Garrus told me this was good stuff," explained Tali holding up a three pound bag of tan seeds. "Said it was called Pop Corn."

Shepherd looked at the three pound bag and had this vision of a kitchen filled with popcorn.

"Tali that was great, I know everyone will love it and . . . You got coconut oil!"

"Garrus said it's best with that type of oil. And here!" She held up a package of butter. "This is dextro butter, so we can have our popcorn too!"

"You are wonderful," John said walking up to her and giving her a little head bump. "Okay Tali, let me show you how to make it on the stove."

"Yahn I know how to . . ."

"This stuff is special okay? Especially with coconut oil."

So Tali watched as John found a nice big jar to pour the kernels into. Then got out a nice pan, and poured an eighth of an inch pool of coconut oil into it. Then he started to heat it up.

"Not enough oil to deep fry them," observed Tali.

"You don't deep fry these seeds," explained John. "Okay once the oil is heated up, I need two ounces of pop corn kernels."

"The pot is bigger than that," argued Tali. "You could easily put four cups into it."

"You don't want to do that," replied John certain now that his prior vision was divinely sent, or at least a normal attack of common sense.

"Why not?"

"I'll show you in a minute," continued John.

"Personally I think she should have experienced this herself," suggested Garrus with a wry grin. "I mean think of the stories you could tell your grandchildren."

"Why do I get this idea that you had been planning to pull a memorable practical joke on your kid sister?" asked John.

"Commander there are days when you are just no fun," protested Garrus.

"Yoke? How can you pull a yoke with seeds and oil?" queried Tali.

"Here Tali," said John grinning. He poured two ounces of pop corn kernels into the pot. "Keep an eye on them and shake the pan a little to keep the oil covering the kernels and let me know if anything odd happens."

He then led Garrus away from the stove.

"Okay, I'll let you do this much," he said to Garrus in a low voice.

"Not fair, you did all the work," protested Garrus.

There was the sound of popping.

"YAHN THEY'RE EXPLODING!"

"Oh no!" Cried John.

"Hold on to the pot Tali!" shouted Garrus, "Hold on with both hands what ever happens don't let go!"

"Take pictures!" shouted Joker from the other room.

And that is how the picture of Tali, holding a pot as far away from her body as possible, with pop corn flying out of it, came to grace their kitchen wall.

Of course after that had all been said and done, John poured it into two bowls, covered one with dextro-butter, the other with levo butter, and everyone dug in.

"I suppose you think that was very funny," she accused, later that night as they were cuddling up in bed. Her helmet, gloves, and boots were off. She had concluded there were too many people in the apartment for her to risk exposure in the rest of the apartment.

John smiled and looked down at her glowing eyes. He moved his left leg over towards her feet and gave them a little nudge. Sure enough one pair of toes quickly gripped it. He loved that little thing she was able to do.

"Yeah, it was. But I won't take complete blame. Garrus had planned to have you just fill the pot and unleash that all over the kitchen."

"I was wondering why he kept grinning like that," she admitted. "But even with all the hints, I didn't see that one coming."

"You really didn't?"

"I didn't know there was an association between the word pop and the word explode," she explained. "I don't know human English. My translator can't capture all the nuances, there are hundreds of thousands of them. Now I'm not entirely out of the loop. I mean when we're wearing our ear buds, I've learned to recognize certain words and sentences and know what they mean. Sort of like you told me after we were able to make love once I got back."

"Oh?" asked John. "So tell me, what's your favorite English sentence you hear me say?"

"I love you."

"I love you too, but what's the favorite sentence?"

"I just told you, Yahn," she said giving him a slight punch in the arm.

"Oh yeah," he chuckled. "Well since you like hearing it, I'll say it again. I love you."

She smiled, snuggled up to him, and began heelrou. And shortly thereafter, he fell asleep.

The next morning James proved very adept with eggs and after the breakfast dishes were cleaned up, Liara came back to the table and resumed research. At around mid morning, she signaled the team to gather.

"We have a lead," she said. "I called in some favors to run a trace on the gun. It led me to a casino owner, Elijah Khan. He's been suspected of using his profits to smuggle weapons onto the citadel. Immediately after the attempt of Shepherd's life, Khan made an interesting call."

She promptly called up a phone record where they heard Khan's voice saying the following . . .

"I'm cutting you off. I'm returning your down payment now.

"What's the problem," came a distorted voice.

"Turn on the vidscreen," replied Khan. "When I sell a gun, I don't want it showing up on the nightly news."

"You won't be linked to me," insisted the mysterious voice.

"Save it," said Khan. "Our association is terminated. And even if you think of coming after me, I've got info on you ready for prime time. So you ponder that. Khan out."

"So that's our identity thief," observed Shepherd.

"With an ID disguiser by the looks of it," grumble Garrus. "Those things are a pain in the ass to get around."

"What info on the mercenaries who attacked us?" asked Shepherd.

"They are a private military organization known as CAT6," answered Liara.

"Hey, that's a nickname for soldiers who got a dishonorable discharge," observed Cortez.

"That can't be good," agreed Joker. "We've got the worst of the worst being hired to take us down."

"Many have criminal records, histories of drug abuse, and other charming features, probably hired by our thief, and not Khan," she elaborated.

"Nice conviction getting phone call Liara," added Shepherd. "How did you get it?"

"Well," began Liara. "Start with the weapons biometric data, add Salarian Intellegence, and then throw in a Hanar prostitute with camera implants."

"No kidding?" exclaimed Joker.

"Yes kidding," answered Liara. "But the truth is way more boring."

"Khan is not sounding like a happy camper," observed Shepherd. "I'd bet he'd be happy to chat."

"You'll need to be a smooth talker," suggested Liara. "His first impression is going to be that you are there to remove his head from his body with a dull butter knife. The Casino has a panic room. No doubt he's hiding in there 'till things cool off."

"It's going to be complicated," observed EDI. "Based on what I have checked with the locks, firewalls, security cameras, and guards."

"And if Khan disappears or his guards open fire, normal people can get hit, like me!" interjected Brooks.

"She's right, we can't risk spooking him. We'll have to go in quiet, a small team, no gunplay," concluded Shepherd.

It was at this point that Glyph informed the group that the Casino was hosting a charity event to assist the war refugees. He was instructed to get tickets, and then a blueprint of the building. In a matter of seconds, the blue print was up.

"Score!" cried Joker. "So this panic room, I don't think it has a back door?"

EDI promptly spotted an air shaft which would lead to the Panic Room observation area where the camera could be easily disabled.

"There has got to be alarms all over that shaft," suggested Kaiden.

"Countermeasures exist which will probably negate that, but we'll know more once we're inside," replied Liara.

"Who ever goes into the shaft, must be small, like Tali," suggested Javik.

"But my suit's tech would be quickly picked up," observed Tali. "By their security sensors."

"And my presence will set off all sorts of alarms since mobile mech units can have cheating software," added EDI.

"What you need is someone trained in zero emissions tech, no electronics, no metal, just undetectable polymers," suggested Brooks. "We had this course in Opt-int, disabling this bomb with little tweezers. The bomb was filled with shaving cream. . .

"That's you girl," observed Joker.

"What? No! What?"

"You're the only one without the tech," said Shepherd.

"Look! All I did was come up to you and talk and I got shot? How am I going to hack into a safe room?" argued Brooks.

"We'll be right there backing you up. Any trouble? And we're there for you."

"If that's settled, there's only one last hurdle to get us inside," said Liara. "It's a black tie event."

"Back into my Alliance Formal Uniform then," sighed Shepherd.

"But I like the way you look in it," cooed Tali. "Soft to the touch too."

That evening, a very fancy Sky-car (rented with Joker as chauffeur) pulled up to the casino and out stepped three people. The first was a Commander in formal Navy Blues. The second was a Quarian in a purple poncho over her suit with a gold chain and glittery semi-precious amethysts hanging from it. The third was a young Indian girl with big brown eyes, black hair done up in a pony tail, and a very form fitting dress which accentuated her curves more than adequately.

John held out his arm and Tali once again latched onto it and very smugly (as far as she was able to in her full suit) sauntered along with him while Brooks wondered aloud how they could be so calm until she concluded that if they could run under a reaper being eaten by a thresher maw . . .

"Relax Brooks," suggested John.

"Right," she whispered. "Okay."

They walked in and Brooks headed for the ventilation shaft. Tali and John began to mingle with the guests. There were all sorts of people at the event. Some were trying to make a difference. Some were depressing. Some were superficial. And some were just plain annoying, like the two Asari who were feeling so sorry for the pain and suffering that John and Tali must being going through as refugees. And throughout the entire affair, there was Brooks moving from confidence to panic to frustration to discomfort as she made her way through the ventilation shaft and with Tali coming up with all sorts of distractions, John was busy shutting down other alarm systems.

There was one amusing moment in the affair.

Joker had come in his dress blues as well and he was at the bar trying to get the Asari bar tender to give him free drinks for all the actions he had engaged in rescuing the citadel from the Cerberus coup attempt. John and Tali stood behind him for a moment listening as he spun this tale of being mocked by the Cerberus troops initially since he had Vrolec's syndrome to his finding and getting into an Atlas Mech and then ending with him blowing dozens of Cerberus operatives into micro dust while their bullets harmlessly bounced off his superior armaments. It was dramatic, tense, highly stimulating, and nearly entirely false. The bartender was not buying it. Joker insisted that if his Commander were there he would endorse every single word of it.

"Shall we?" whispered John to Tali.

"We shall," she replied.

They walked up.

"Yoker! Is that all you're going to tell the Bartender?" asked Tali.

Joker nearly jumped out of his skin. "Umm Commander, Tali, umm."

"Heard the whole thing Joker," said John giving him a slightly stern look.

"Well I . . ." he said again.

"And you're being entirely too modest," added Tali. "You completely forgot to tell her about the time you maneuvered the Normandy between those two massive ships to lose those collector drones."

"And who could forget the fact that your first Reaper kill was with a single shot to the center," added John. He had deliberately put a special emphasis on the word first.

"And all those enemies you mowed down with a single assault rifle while Yahn and I were trying to get back on board trying to escape Harbingher," continued Tali. "Just before the entire base blew up?"

"Well you see," replied Joker, realizing that his Commander and Tali were in fact going to endorse his tall tales. "I didn't want to overwhelm her."

"You mean he was telling the truth?" she gasped.

"Not entirely," explained Tali. "He never gives himself all the credit he deserves, he always downplays his abilities."

"Ah guys, now you're embarrassing me," stammered Joker struggling to not giggle.

"He's the best pilot in the Alliance Navy," stated John. "The deadliest shot, and the most innovative thinker on the team. If it were not for his Vrolec's Syndrome. He'd also be Specter material."

"Well, you can't all be me now," suggested Joker.

"Mr. Moreau, I completely underestimated you," said the Asari, looking upon him with new found awe. "Here, the drinks are on me for the evening."

"Have fun," giggled Tali as she gave him a gentle hug.

"So tell me about those drones you were evading," she asked Joker about as they walked away.

"Well we had just gone through the Omega Four Relay. You've heard of that one right? The one no ship has ever come back alive to report on, until me of course . . ." Joker began before his voice faded into the background ambiance of the casino.

"He'll be impossible to deal with in the morning," suggested John to Tali.

"So will I," giggled Tali. "According to my acclimation mod, I can be forty five minutes outside my suit or four hours without my helmet tomorrow. Guess which I'm picking first thing in the morning?"

"Just fill my head with all sorts of distractions for the rest of the mission will you?" grumbled John. "I have to be able to smooth talk Khan into giving us information and now I'm having these visions of a sweet lovable pretty teenage Quarian girl, totally naked, wrapping her arms and feet around me and purring into my ear."

"You look cute when you try to suppress grins while being stern," observed Tali.

They reached the safe room, slipped in, and found Khan dead. Brooks who had gotten into the room just seconds prior, noted that there was also a deletion order on the terminal. John and Tali however were not so easily deterred. Since the wipes had to be fast, they found mistakes and were able to recover information. Then they returned to the Apartment.

"That was quite the party," mused Tali once they had returned home. "Well, except for the murder at the end."

"It wasn't a total loss," replied John. "Brooks? Get EDI and Liara and start working on those drives."

"Here's hoping," replied Brooks. "I'll let you know what we find Commander."

"Thanks Brooks. I'm going to turn in a little early. Tomorrow's going to be a busy day."

"Very busy," added Tali with a little flirt in her voice.

"Heh!" observed Wrex with a big toothy grin. "Why didn't you ask me on a date Shepherd? Too much Krogan for you to handle?"

"Very," replied John with a grin. "You simply overwhelm me with your Kroganality."

They walked into the bedroom and Tali stretched for a second, and removed her jewelry and poncho before sitting on the bed.

"So, do I get into my sweats? Or do I just not bother?" queried John while he was hanging up his uniform.

"Might as well get into them," suggested Tali, laying down on the bed. "I won't be doing anything until tomorrow morning."

John got into his sweats and looked at Tali and sighed.

"What's the matter Yahn?"

"There are times when I just despise that suit of yours, more so now because I know how sweet and pretty that face is underneath."

"But Yahn, don't you agree the benefits tomorrow will make it worth it?"

John paused.

"That is a question fraught with peril," he answered.

"How . . . so?"

"Do I miss your face? Very. Am I looking forward to being woken up by a very pretty girl trying to make love to me in the morning? Very. You see the problem?"

"Yeah," she said with a tone in her voice that suggested she was smiling.

"Good," replied John with a release of breath. He flopped down on the bed while Tali cuddled up to him.

"Well we're back on the clock," he observed.

"At least we have something to do," suggested Tali gently running a finger tip across John's chest. "I mean some days things are really dull since we've been away from the Normandy."

"We have a job, but when we're not doing it, what do you do?" queried John. "The first few days are really fun, but then you get tired of going to the arcade again, or the restaurant, or shopping, and there's really no movie I'm interested in and the Vid is full of rotten programming."

"At least we have each other," suggested Tali. "I don't get tired of cuddling up to you, do you?"

John was horribly tempted to say yes, just for the reaction. But with tomorrow's love making on the line, it struck him as a very bad idea. Even so, it was at this juncture that his arm decided to fall asleep. He shifted and turned to face her, looking at those glowing orbs behind the smoky visor.

"Never," he said. "But I really want to kiss you."

"Three seconds won't hurt," she whispered, and removed her visor so they could.

Three minutes later, they were still kissing. Thirty minutes later, she had removed a bit more than her visor. And three hours later, they had taken the morning's activities a bit early and for way longer than the acclimation mod would have recommended.

"We've been bad," she giggled as she lay in his arms and they watched the clock go from 0214 to 0215. "But I'm still not having a single reaction."

"I was wondering that," mused John, "Given that according to what you said early on, the real issue is me, not so much the room."

"No, the room is an issue too, but I've been in it for almost four weeks now and it's like the Normandy in so far as it's just a spaceship. All the same principles are there, a self-contained ecosystem, a constant filtration system, the persistent presence of anti-microbe nano-bots always sterilizing the air. "

"So you think you acclimated sooner?"

"Quite possibly. I think I'm going to stay like this for the rest of the night and see what happens," she concluded.

"In the interests of medical science of course?" suggested John grinning.

"In the interests of the fact that I like lying in your arms naked," replied Tali. "I'm a pleasure beast right now. Falling asleep like this is going to be nice."

And it was nice. In fact both of them would have agreed it was very nice.

John woke up the next morning first, he could hear James outside the door of the bedroom singing to himself some spanish song while the smell of frying sausage filled the air. There was something about Spanish to the English speaker that made it sound very romantic.

"Joker?" shouted James. "You want any eggs and sausage?"

"Yeah in a minute," groaned Joker's faint and hungover voice.

"Had a bit too much party last night eh?"

"Remind me not to over impress bartenders," Joker replied.

Smiling, John got into his underwear and then turned to look at Tali, still asleep. There she was, laying on her side of the bed, a little smile on her face, eyes gently closed. He paused and wondered what it was about her that make him simply want to hold her, that curious sense of possession which was so pleasurable to experience.

"Subliminal 'hug me' waves," he mused to himself. And since she was obviously emanating them, he proceeded to sit down next to her, and gently lifted her up so that he could hold her by her shoulders over his lap. She woke up in the middle of this maneuver and looked up at him.

"Yahn, is it morning already?"

"Afraid so," he said. "You were wonderful last night you know that?"

"You told me several times," she replied and then sniffled. "Of course it's good to hear it now, I was having a hard time paying attention to what you were saying there at the end, I kept kissing you and floating away."

"So that's what it feels like?" he asked.

She paused and sniffled again. "It's the nearest approxima . . . AHCHOO!"

She just started to sneeze, over and over again.

"Yust when you (ACHOO) think you are (ACHOO) over acclimation (ACHOO ACHOO ACHOO)." she continued.

"No more pretty little naked Tali girl for me today," sighed John.

And he helped her into her suit. She sneezed through the whole thing, clearly was rapidly congesting, and even after her helmet was on, she sneezed several more times, and John had the curious experience of seeing a Quarian blow their nose, in a suit, without benefit of handkerchief. It was a curious set of sounds and body language.

"I wonder what you would be doing if you were suffering from a case of diarrhea."

"That's not funny Yahn," she replied. "It's not fun at all. Not in the suit."

"It's not especially fun outside the suit either," admitted John. "I wasn't making a joke so much as speculating out loud."

She began to help him get into his combat armor. Neither of them asked why they should be preparing for combat it was just one of those gut level instinct suspicions which told them that today was likely going to be fighting. She was still sniffling a bit and checking her stats.

"Bosh'tet," she grumbled. "My temperature is already a half of a degree over normal."

"Tali," sighed John. "I'm so sorry. If I had been a bit more hard headed . . ."

"Yahn," she hugged him. "It was worth it . . . *sniffles* . . . I hope. When I'm out of my suit and in your arms, I can't feel any closer to you. I so cherish that. And someday, when we have a house under Tikkun, these days will be forgotten. I know it. So, don't blame yourself. I really worked hard to seduce you last night."

"Just the same," he sighed. "I swear I am more fearful of your safety in this apartment than I ever am in combat."

"Really?" she asked.

John paused and shook his head. "No, it's more that every time I worry, it seems to be the greatest worry I've got. I love you too much to not be terrified of losing you suddenly."

Well there was nothing for it but to hug him as tightly as possible.

"You're on my six today, understand?" commanded John.

"Understood Commander," she said in a soft little girl voice.

John walked out and headed to the kitchen where James piled up a heap of Mexican scrambled eggs which meant that all the good stuff had been put in. Grabbing a fork he noticed Brooks and EDI were busy at the dining table going over data pads. While they talked, he enjoyed the eggs, which were really quite good. James was not kidding when he said he did eggs.

"I think we've got something Commander," suggested Brooks as he walked up. "EDI and I have been analyzing those drives." "Though the data's root structure was erased, the logic integrity remains viable," said EDI.

"EDI has an incredible talent for this stuff," added Brooks. "I know she's an AI, but even still. We found an encrypted communication from a few days ago. Just need another minute to crack it."

"A whole minute?" asked Joker grinning. "EDI can shave that down to five seconds."

"I thought it best to allow Staff Analyst Brooks a chance to improve her decryption skills," explained EDI.

"And now you've lost your chance to show off," argued Joker.'

"Like she needs it," laughed Brooks.

"It's all just part of the job," suggested John between mouthfuls.

"Wait?" joked Garrus. "You mean the rest of you are being paid for this?"

"Wow!" cried Brooks. "Those mercs who were after you? They bought a lot of weapons, like big ones."

"Mechs," groaned Kaiden. "What do they need that kind of firepower for?"

"Us of course," replied Wrex. "I mean I'm here aren't I? When I'm around, you need a lot of fire power."

"I have to agree with Wrex," added Tali. "The bigger the target . . . means . . . the bigger the target."

"Wait?" said Wrex looking at Tali. "Are you saying I've gained weight?"

"What she means," explained Liara with just a slight smile. "Is that there is more of the legend to love."

Wrex grumbled to himself until Garrus slapped him on the shoulder.

"Lord of Tuchanka, Leader of the Palavan Expeditionary Force, Thresher Maw killer, you are rather bigger than life these days," he suggested.

"Oh yeah," agreed Wrex. And he appeared to be feeling better.

It was at this point that Glyph started blinking red and flew into the middle of the table.

"It appears that the drone is preparing to rebel," warned Javik.

"I have just monitored the Commander's Specter access code in use at the Citadel Archives," informed Glyph.

"Punch it up," said Shepherd.

"The archives are going into emergency lockdown," observed Brooks. "Whoever's hacking your records is there right now."

"What do we know about the place?" asked Shepherd.

"Council keeps sensitive historical information there," answered Garrus. "Real hush hush. Even my old C-sec clearances never got me in."

"Then we'll find our own way in," concluded Shepherd. "Everyone gear up."

"These archives are huge," observed Brooks. "You'll have a lot of ground to cover. Shame you can't bring everyone."

"Huh?" said just about everyone.

"We know how to operate as a single team," explained Shepherd. "In fact, just about everyone here already knows their position, save Wrex . . ."

"Heh! I know my position," replied Wrex grinning. "On the top of a pile of dead enemies eating roast varren legs!"

"What's the best way into the archives?" asked Shepherd.

"The facility is located below the Wards," explained Brooks. "Maybe a direct breach for maximum surprise?"

"I like it," replied Shepherd. "It sounds like you're learning the ropes now."

"Hell," observed Cortez. "Hang out with us long enough and you'll not just be learning the ropes, you'll be learning the the knives, bombs, and thresher maws."

"But don't hang out too long unless you want to make friends with Asari," advised Wrex.

"I love you too Wrex," replied Liara.

"Ahem," suggested Garrus.

"Metaphor," replied Liara giving a 'I didn't think you would be jealous of that' look to Garrus.

Shortly thereafter, everyone piled into sky-cars and were zipping off to the archives. Brooks was concerned how they were going to get in, until John produced a nice controlled explosion.

And they all jumped in.


	27. Chapter 27 - A Clone War

John set the formation for the group the moment they were all in the archives. He was at point with Garrus as Right Wing Sniper with Liara as spotter. Wrex and James were on his left and Javik with Cortez on his right. Behind him were Tali and EDI and Kaiden took Left Flank. Brooks was put behind Tali and EDI on the left. She was not meshed with the group and accordingly John wanted her as safe as possible. Joker remained with the sky cars.

The group began to push forward, Glyph sending reconnaissance reports on the position of the Identity Thief. Then suddenly everyone found little red laser dots on their armor plating.

"Not this again," groaned Shepherd.

"Ambush!" shouted Garrus.

"Team take cover!" ordered Shepherd.

CAT6 gunners were everywhere and orders were being shouted in an effort to surround and pin down the team. The sounds of gunfire destroying valuable historical artifacts filled the room.

CAT6 had good weapons and good armor, but like other mercenary units they had no genuine unit cohesion. And more over they had even less discipline than the more polished Blue Suns or Eclipse. The team began to radio each other and as the threat became less and less focuses, the more at ease the team became.

"In the old days we had at least a few minutes before a mission went south," shouted Wrex.

"Brooks? You ok?" asked Shepherd.

"I'm taking cover!" she called back.

"Good girl!" advised Kaiden. "Having a little party on this side . . . With bullets."

"Primitives are making good sport!" advised Javik.

"Terminating hostiles," reported EDI.

"One big ass kicking family!" shouted James. "See that shot Brooks? That's how legends do it!"

"If I wasn't covering my eyes and hiding!" she replied. "I'm sure I'd be impressed."

"All right everyone! Uncle Urdnot is back in town and he's brought the boom!"

"Auditioning for Blasto Eight, Wrex?" asked Shepherd.

"Thought I'd try it out. What did you think?"

"It's a Blasto Vid," replied Tali. "It doesn't have to be that catchy."

"Prothean over here!" shouted a CAT6.

"Corpse over there!" replied Javik.

"Spotted Archangel!" screamed another CAT6. "How are we supposed to kill him?"

The crack of a sniper rifle felling that CAT6 answered in reply. The firefight and playful banter by the team went on for about three minutes. Then there was a lull in the fighting. Shepherd pulled back on the leash to keep his team from charging forward.

"Remember when we were swimming in Medi-gel on the Collector Base," he warned.

"I missed out on that fun," sighed Wrex.

"I wouldn't have called it fun," replied Tali.

"Grunt did," answered Wrex.

The team continued to advance cautiously, now that Shepherd was once again reminding them that bullets can kill you.

"We called the first team, Team Specter," mused Kaiden.

"And the second team, Team Shepherd," replied Garrus.

"What do we call this team?" asked Kaiden.

"Team Mako?" suggested Liara.

"What's a Mako?" asked Brooks.

"Something we could use right about now," replied Liara.

"He's pushing into the archives," concluded Shepherd. "Stay in formation folks, advance under cover. They know where we are and we know where they are, but they were here first and can set up ambushes."

They pushed further in and found themselves in a massive cylinder storage room.

"Reminds me of Purgatory," observed Tali.

"Only bigger," replied Garrus.

"What's he looking for?" asked Kaiden.

"Any thing is possible," answered Shepherd.

"Such as?" continued Kaiden.

"I don't want to think about it," replied Shepherd.

"At least until after we have all had a drink," suggested Tali.

"How are we going to find him?" asked James.

"Glyph?" asked Shepherd. "Track the target. Give me an update as to it's location."

"There they are!" shouted a CAT6 Captain. "Shepherd is still alive!"

"Take them down!" shouted a distorted voice. "I still need time to find the vault."

The firefight took off and as the team worked their way along a set of elevated platforms. Once again, the team was able to observe numerous historical artifacts before they used them as cover and then saw them shredded with bullets.

"Take that platform!" radioed Liara. "Garrus and I can get you into a better position."

The team followed Liara's instructions and they were able to close with the CAT6 fire team.

"Target is 200 yards ahead," advised Glyph.

"Crest and Bugs here!" radioed Liara. "We're drawing their fire."

"They've got a Krogan!" cried one of the CAT6's. "Why can't we have Krogan?!"

"You're just not awesome enough!" shouted Wrex.

"Fall back! Fall back!" shouted the CAT6 Captain.

"This almost doesn't seem fair," suggested Wrex. "Maybe we should all blindfold ourselves."

"Are you crazy?" cried Brooks. "I'm not even a field agent!"

"Just follow Shepherd's lead and we'll do the hard stuff," suggested Liara.

"You Joker clones think you can start to hit things about now?" queried Shepherd.

There was another silent moment. The team gathered and took stock as the examined the vast space they were moving through.

"We got them all, err, the rest of you did," observed Brooks.

"Just the Krogan," replied Wrex.

They pushed ahead and CAT6 tried to ambush them again. Everyone quickly dived into cover and even more valuable historical artifacts were destroyed in the merry melee.

"Attention lowlife mercenary wannabe's! Say 'please' and we'll accept your surrender," shouted James.

"Say 'pretty please' and maybe Wrex will take a break," added Tali.

"The Prothean on the other hand, makes no such promises," shouted Javik.

"Attention enemy drones," added Glyph. "Please cease hostile action. I believe we could benefit from a mutual exchange of data. Additionally, the term, floating butler, does not encompass all my primary functions. One day, I too hope to possess combat capabilities like yourselves."

"Ah, isn't that sweet?" joked Kaiden. "When he grows up Commander, he wants to be just like you!"

"Why would he want to grow up and be just a hand grenade when he can be a bouncing betty chain lightning thermonuclear cannon like me!" shouted Wrex.

"Where's the target Glyph?" queried Shepherd.

"He is searching for a secret vault. He did not wish to be disturbed," replied Glyph.

John did not question Glyph, he merely requested that Glyph return to locating the target while Javik grumbled about the stupidity of VI's and Tali suggested her drone would be more competent at this. As the team moved into the next room, CAT6 was once again waiting, with even bigger armaments.

"Atlas on the walkway!" shouted Tali as everyone dived for new cover. CAT6 troopers shooting Lancer Assault Rifles was one thing, the shields compensated for enough time to enable you to find cover. An Atlas however, was something not to be trifled with.

"Crest and Bugs are on it!" replied Liara.

"Try to help out your friends and you end up in a Mech fight," sighed Garrus.

With the entire team concentrating on the Mech, they were able to disable it.

"I will never get tired of watching Mechs explode," commented Tali.

"Commander?" reported Glyph. "A large contingent of soldiers calling themselves 'Razor Squad' is just ahead. They want to hurt you very badly. Also, I found an Elcor mating totem in vault #347B which is most interesting."

"You are just full of interesting surprises today aren't you?" drolled Tali.

"Attention enemy soldiers, you only have a .04 percent chance of winning this encounter," suggested Glyph as this Razor squad closed in.

"Bull here!" shouted Wrex unleashing his assault rifle at a crowd of rapidly approaching CAT6. "Showing the rest of you how it's done!"

"Blue here!" retorted Kaiden. "And you're just copying me, Bull!"

"Crest here!" replied Liara. "If I was copying Blue, I wouldn't be hitting anything."

"Red here!" announced Javik. "I have a higher body count that all of you combined.

"Ah!" screamed Brooks, "I'll never be a field agent!"

"What happened?" queried Kaiden.

"I got shot in the knee!" she replied.

"Dive here!" which was Cortez's code name. "Looks like things are getting serious with this Razor squad!"

"Mex here! If Dive is worried, maybe he needs to start hitting something!"

"The biggest target I see is Mex's mouth!" retorted Cortez.

"I've fought Volus bankers tougher than this!" cried Wrex.

"It's supposed to be mud crabs that are tougher!" suggested Cortez.

"Differing company trademarks!" shouted Wrex back.

"What? Oh never mind!" groaned Cortez.

"This is Duck quacking, and if you're all so hot!" suggested Tali. "Why am I the one sleeping with the Commander?"

"Oooo, that's just not fair Ducky!" groaned Garrus. "Playing the 'I'm in bed with the big guy card'."

"Okay if it's alright with everyone," cried Brooks. "I think I'll just find a nice quiet corner to throw up in."

For the next five minutes, the team plowed ahead and burst into a new section. They charged forward and then got the surprise of their lives.

It seemed as if Commander Shepherd was holding Brooks hostage.

"That's enough!" he said. "Drop your weapons or this won't end well for her."

John looked at the situation for a moment.

"This is what you get for letting an untrained person join you for a mission," he sighed.

"Alright!" He replied and put his weapon down. The rest of the team did the same. They were quickly surrounded by CAT6 who grabbed the weapons and then the Shepherd look alike activated a containment field enclosing the entire team outside of Brooks. They were effectively immobilized for the duration.

"Not exactly how I saw this playing out," sighed Garrus.

"Who are you," asked John.

"You were not the only Shepherd that Cerberus brought back to life," the other Shepherd said. "But now I intend to do something about it."

"Where did you come from?" asked John.

"The same DNA as you," replied the other Shepherd.

"A clone," groaned Garrus.

"Cerberus spared no expense resurrecting you. With me? I was created for spare parts," replied the Clone.

For a split second, John felt a horrible empathy for the man. He had been a classic victim of Cerberus, a tool to be used, and more painfully than most to boot.

"Then where have you been this whole time?" asked John.

"In my own private hell, what they called a coma, until six months ago," replied the Clone. "Since then I've been learning about what it is to be human. Amazing what a person can do with enough neural implants."

"You could be with us," suggested John. And he meant that. "We can be team mates . . . Brothers!"

The clone laughed derisively.

"Why are you trying to kill us?" asked Tali.

"I don't have his," and here he jerked his thumb at John, "memories. I'd never fool his supposed friends, least of all his . . . bond mate."

He looked at Tali with disgust written all over his face.

"I don't know if I should shoot you with a bullet, or just rip off your visor and cough."

John began to tremble as his fists clenched.

"You're nothing but a cheap imitation of my Yahn," she snapped.

"I'm the real thing perfected," replied the clone. "Shepherd without the wear and tear, without the doubts and scruples, the lone wolf that was supposed to be. Without the emotional baggage holding me back."

"No one will ever believe you are Shepherd," suggested Garrus defiantly.

"They will when I'm flying his ship," replied the clone with a grin that reminded Tali horribly of John's grin. There was just a cruel edge to the clone's grin which made her shudder. In fact, the more the clone talked and walked, the more Tali was reminded of John. It might be a cheap imitation, but it was likewise way too alike for her to not be emotionally ravaged by it.

John tried to activate his command link to the Normandy, but it was already blocked. The clone simply activated his Omni-tool and said, "Traynor? Prep the Normandy for departure. We're leaving. Admiral Hackett has an emergency we need to respond to."

"Acknowledged," replied Samantha on the comm. "We'll get underway."

"As for the you and your friends," continued the clone. "You will all be trapped in a single iridium vault and forgotten for . . . forever."

"Others will know about this, and about you. The Alliance will stop you," snapped Shepherd.

"What do you think Staff Analyst Brooks, will the Alliance stop us?" asked the clone.

"I wouldn't know," replied Brooks who just walked away from the guns which had been 'holding' her hostage. "I don't actually work for them."

"Who are you," demanded John looking at Brooks. The rest of the team was engaging in what is commonly known as shock and surprise.

"My name is not important," she replied. "I never keep the same one for more than a few days. And if the Illusive Man hasn't found me yet, neither will you."

"You're Cerberus!"

"Was," she replied. "The Illusive Man and I didn't see eye to eye. He's a ruthless madman whereas I'm just ruthless."

"Why not come to me?" asked John. "We could have worked together."

"In a way we did," she replied smiling. "I'm the one who put together all those dossiers on your 'suicide mission'."

"The Collector Base?" exclaimed Shepherd incredulous.

"Nice to have finally met you . . . Archangel," she replied.

"Charmed," dead panned Garrus.

"They were all mistakes, we were a pro-human group who started looking to aliens for help. So I bided my time, and when I found another you who agreed . . . I woke him up," she continued.

"What was the point of it all?" asked Shepherd. He could feel Tali's hand on his arm. She was trembling.

"All we really wanted was your Specter code," she continued. "But then you survived the hit and insisted on bringing your damned Asari into it, so I had to tie up loose ends . . ."

"The arms dealer," commented Shepherd.

"But then your sex bot just had to go and recover the data. So here we are . . . forced to contain the situation."

"Fair warning," suggested Shepherd. "No one who has betrayed us has ever survived."

"And yet, oddly," observed Garrus. "They keep trying."

"You two may think you're clever, and yeah, you're some of the most clever I've run into. But with good timing, clever is a lousy bullet shield," continued Shepherd. "And yeah, I'm trapped here, but don't get comfortable, because that bulls eye on your back is getting bigger by the second."

"That sounds very dramatic," she said with a slight smile. "And if that someone who said it were Commander Shepherd? I'd be worried. But you're not Shepherd, not any more."

"You had Miranda," suggested the clone. "I have her, and as you can see, she has more bite."

"But it was fun while it lasted," suggested Brooks.

"Now if you'll excuse me," finished the clone. "The Normandy needs it captain, so . . . I should go."

"Farewell Commander," added Brooks. "I guess this is where legends go to die."

Suddenly there was a lurch on the platform and the entire crew found themselves stored in an iridium tube placed within what they suspected was a massive wall of iridium tubes, all no doubt looking exactly alike.

"If we die, we all die together!" shouted Liara defiantly.

"I'm not Shepherd?" mused John. "Girl doesn't know how to think. Being is not limited by it's accidents. That clone will never be the 'real' Shepherd even though he has a body which is a DNA copy of mine. Being isn't just material, there's a spiritual component as well. Now the clone did pick up on that some what subliminally when he realized he would never fool my friends or you Tali . . ."

"Yahn!" cried Tali. "This is not the time for a philosophical conversation."

"We probably have got maybe an hour of air in here before we all suffocate," mused Javik. "I never imagined I would die surrounded by primitives."

"This has gone rather . . . well," suggested Garrus with a seasoning of sarcasm in his voice.

"He said, 'I should go'. Do I sound like that?" asked John.

"'Fraid so, Loco," answered James.

"I'm thinking we need to be worried about the impregnable vault we've been sealed behind," suggested Liara. "Just saying . . ."

"How come nobody told me this before. I'm open for feedback here." asked John.

"I'm really not one to talk, I've been accused of saying 'calibrating' more than a Turian ought to."

"You seemed so attached to it, why mess with a good thing," suggested Kaiden.

"I don't have a problem with it Shepherd," suggested Wrex. "Though I think you should say 'Die by my hot lead!' more often instead."

"I was hoping if I was to die with you, I would die in your arms, but with everyone else watching . . . It kind of takes all the romance out of it," sighed Tali.

"Maybe its, '**I** should go' or ;I **should** go; or 'I should **go**'."

"With all due respect commander," suggested Cortez. "Why are you not worried about this?"

"Hmm? Oh Glyph? Are you still out there?"

"Yes Commander," replied Glyph flying up to the vault.

"Unlock this damn thing and alert Joker. No one steals my ship, not even me!"

"But didn't we do that back when . . ." suggested Tali.

"Figure of speech Tali."

"Oh, and by the way Yahn, I love you."

"Oh you're so sweet Tali," suggested Liara.

"Shepherd you are blushing again," added Garrus.

"Hey if Sparks were hanging off me like she's hanging off the Commander right now? I'd be blushing too."

As the team dashed back to the entrance they had originally blown a hole for, Joker landed in one of the sky-cars they had procured to get to the archives.

"I've got room for Shepherd plus two but figure it out fast," he said. "Someone is stealing my ship!"

Tali promptly hopped in the back seat. Quarians are territorial that way.

"Err Shepherd and Tali plus one," corrected Joker.

"EDI?" called Shepherd. "Come with Joker for moral. Cortez? Find one of the other sky cars and bring Garrus and Liara and Wrex ASAP. James? Kaiden? Alert C-sec and the Ascension. Then get to the dock ASAP as well. Let's go!"

John moved to sit in the front seat while Tali loudly cleared her throat. He grinned to Joker in an embarrassed manner and sat in the back with Tali while EDI sat in front. Tali promptly grabbed his arm with both her hands land leaned into him. Joker took off and shot for the docks.

"This is why I hate shore leave," grumbled Joker. "I swear you park the ship for five minutes . . ."

"Kaiden should be alerting flight control and they might be able to shut down the departure request or at least delay it," suggested Shepherd.

"All the Comm lines are being jammed right now," grumbled Joker. "Probably in order to make it easier for them to steal my ship!"

"We'll stop them," assured Shepherd. He turned to Tali.

"Really Tali, why did you get so affectionate all of a sudden in the vault?"

"Yahn," she explained. "There we were all thinking we were going to die. And wondering if you had gone crazy getting side tracked by all those insignificant things, and then, yust like that, you rescue us. You were so heroic I had to hug you and tell you how wonderful you were." She sighed. "Pity it was so crowded in there I would have sugyested we make love."

"Um Tali?" observed Joker. "Before you make the Commander blush too much . . ."

"Shepherd," cried EDI. "Your clone has entered the ship and is attempting to . . ." Suddenly she went cross eyed, made some curious electronic gargling noises which suggested small gears revving up and slumped over.

"Well this is awkward," mused Tali.

Suddenly EDI rebooted and sat up saying "I'm okay!" which Tali found hard to be certain of since EDI's eyes were still looking at each other. In another second, EDI had straightened out her eyes again.

"The clone has my control of the Normandy, as well as all sensory input. I can not lock him out or counteract his commands," she observed. "Also Bytes is very upset as his favorite den has just been erased, along with his Underground Shooter score record," she continued. "I am experiencing a significant feedback loop in my head which is creating an increased desire to kill your clone."

"Get in line," grumbled Shepherd.

"What ever you do," sighed Joker. "Hurry. If the Normandy gets to FTL, we may never see her again."

"If they get the Normandy," asked Tali. "We can still contact the Alliance directly right? You can prove you're the real Shepherd?"

"No," sighed John. "He hacked the biometric logs, any scan we try will show him as the real Shepherd."

"Yes! That! Can we all just agree that it'd be easier to not let Shepherd's evil clone steal the Normandy?" Suggested Joker.

"Don't worry Joker," said Shepherd. "We'll get your ship back."

"Better," grumbled Joker. "I just got the seat broken in how I like it."

The sky-car swooped into the docks and then Joker had to make a forced landing as the local defenses started to target them. Not to mention CAT6. John, Tali, and EDI leapt out of the car while Joker swooped back up to secure Kaiden and James. There was a running firefight up to the entryway of the Normandy while the ship itself continued to make the various noises which comes from an Alliance Frigate 'steaming' up to take off. John was thankful that ships took a while to 'warm up' before they could take off.

"When we take off," he grumbled. "There's a half an hour of pre-flight checks we have to go through. They're just gunning the engines and getting ready to go!"

"Um Yahn?" said Tali. "Those checks are yust to make you feel like you matter."

"Thanks Tali," groaned John.

As he reached the air lock, they ran into Samantha who was obviously very upset and waving her toothbrush about. Samantha's toothbrush was one of her curious quirks. She was very proud if it. It was a Cision Pro Mark 4 which incorporated tiny Mass Effect fields to break up plaque and massage the gums.

"And I don't even . . . Wait! What?" she was muttering to herself as she looked up and saw Shepherd dashing up to her. "You were just on the Normandy. You fired me! A dishonorable discharge for conduct unbecoming! You kicked me off the ship with barely enough time to grab my toothbrush!"

"The last thing to grab is her toothbrush," mused Tali. She paused to wonder what her most treasured item was, but was quickly brought back to the moment.

John observed that she had never mated Tali in Chess in under sixty moves.

"Yes I told you that!" she retorted.

"And I remembered it because I'm the real Shepherd!" he replied.

"If it wasn't you who threw me off the ship . . ." mused Samantha.

"A clone," remarked Tali who was busy with EDI trying to break into the Airlock entrance of the Normandy. "Spend enough time with Yahn and you'll get used to things like this Samantha." she suggested.

"I can explain more later," added Shepherd. "But for now . . ."

"Sealed up," reported EDI. "And they are about to take off."

"Is there anyone else on board?" asked Shepherd facing Samantha.

"No," she answered. "Everyone else is on shore leave. I was only on because I knew where all the prior retrofits were during the dock at Vancouver."

"Can you get us inside?" asked Shepherd.

"There's an emergency exit hatch for evacuations right here," she replied, lifting up a floor panel and showing them a latch door set into the hull.

Tali began to scan it. "Manual lock and designed to be opened only from the other side," she observed.

"Any ideas?" asked Shepherd.

"From this side?" replied Tali. "A very precise Mass Effect field at best . . . maybe."

There was a small high pitched whine that caused everyone to look up. Samantha's toothbrush was glowing blue. She was very proudly holding it.

Three minutes later, they were crawling through the vents.

"If you had told me this morning that a toothbrush was going to save the Normandy," suggested Shepherd. "I would have been very skeptical."

"It is okay us crawling through your vents EDI?" asked Samantha.

"I enjoy the sight of humans on their knees," replied EDI.

Everyone paused to look back at EDI.

"That was a joke," she explained.

The firefight was predictable in outcome. Shepherd, Tali, and EDI quickly took out the CAT6 around the Command center and then they rode up the elevator to the Captain's Cabin with Samantha in tow with a pistol. Outside they found John's Hamster Cage and Tali's picture, in the dumpster. The hamster was in a small cardboard box with a note suggesting that it was unprofessional to have a rodent in the Captain's Cabin. The glass in the frame of the picture was broken and had scratched a gouge in the picture itself across Tali's face.

"Now it's personal!" shouted Shepherd.

"The picture or the hamster?" asked EDI.

"The hamster of course, OUCH!" said Shepherd. He grinned at Tali while rubbing his arm.

Tali just looked at him.

"I don't think Tali found that joke funny," observed EDI.

"You think?" asked Tali.

"We can make a copy," replied Shepherd. "And we can get a new frame. And the original has just punched me in the arm. Which is a lot better. Once the hamster dies, we have to get a whole new hamster."

"Yust because you can make it sound reasonable doesn't mean I regret punching you," suggested Tali. She looked at Shepherd who was still grinning. "I am almost certain you get a crazy masochistic enyoyment out of provoking me into punching you."

"Well maybe . . . sometimes . . . because it's such a Tali thing to do," he replied.

"So if I were to punch you in the arm when you said something I didn't like?" queried EDI.

"I'd be very annoyed and dress you down and then assign you to computing the value of Pi to the billion trillionth decimal point and then write it out on a note pad," replied Shepherd.

"Thank you for that advisement," replied EDI. "I shall adjust my responses accordingly."

"Wait!" gasped Samantha. "You mean you were actually thinking of doing it?"

"Traynor?" interjected Shepherd. "Remind me to compensate you for the destruction of your toothbrush."

"Thanks commander," she replied.

"Yahn? Don't forget to compensate Samantha for her toothbrush."

"Later Tali, later."

"Where did the yucky you go Yahn?"

"We're going to keep looking until we find out," replied John. "Now that the ship is moving, he can't get away that easily."

The firefighting moved through the ship and down into the Armory where the docking hatch opened during the fight. Based upon the com communications, Joker and Cortez had both maneuvered their sky-cars in front of the Normandy, forcing the ship to slow down as it tried to speed out of the citadel. The pilot was no match for the skill of either man, and things were further exacerbated when EDI, now able to start trying to get back into the AI systems of the Normandy, released Bytes first with the instructions to 'go for' the pilot.

The climax came when EDI knocked Brooks out and John and his clone rolled down the ramp and both nearly went over. Tali was there immediately for John and was pulling him up when the clone looked at the John for a second all the while hanging on to the edge of the ramp. Beneath him the buildings of the ward flew by.

"Look at you. What makes you so damn special?" he shouted. "Why you and not me?"

John paused. Was it a shout of defiance? A demand for clarification? Or a plea for help?

"He loves me!" shouted Tali. She had helped Shepherd get up and was now maintaining a physical contact with him.

The clone looked up. At the edge of the armory, he could see that Brooks had recovered from her blow, but was not coming down. She gave him a look which suggested either cowardice or despair and then turned her back on him. Tali saw a look of utter loneliness upon his face and for a second her heart went out to him.

John reached his hand out to the clone.

"Take it!" he cried. "And live! We are the same. We can be family."

And Tali felt so much love for John at that instant that she thought her heart would burst.

For a brief moment, there was a look of hope in the clone's face, and then a spasm of hate so profound that Tali uttered a gasp. Then the clone just let go and fell into the buildings beneath.

"We could have been brothers!" cried John at the falling body. He seemed to slump for a moment.

The ramp remained open, but the Normandy decelerated to a standstill, and hovered over the ward. In a matter of seconds, Joker flew into the armory with his sky-car and Cortez with his. The two got out and continued their exchange over who was the wuss driver, each one nominating the other. Joker went up to the pilot's chair where he found the CAT6 pilot struggling with four clones of Glyph all shouting Bytes' favorite battle cries for Underground Shooter.

Five minutes later, the Normandy pulled back into the docks and Shepherd found the rest of his crew waiting for him.

There had been one last moment of defiance from Brooks as they reached the air lock.

"Admit it," she suggested with a certain amount of pride. "Some part of you liked having me around, looking up to the legend. We had some laughs, and who knows? Maybe we'll have some more someday. You know you'll miss me."

John looked at her for a moment and she smiled.

"Do you see this woman?" he asked, putting his arm around Tali's shoulders. "This woman, Tali, has loved me more deeply and completely than any fan could hope to achieve. More than any sycophant. Why be satisfied with hero worship when you can have love? And why even treasure hero worship when it passes so quickly? Both Tali and I have been up and down that wheel called public adulation. No one knows better how quickly it can transform from praises to curses, from triumphs to defeats. The very people who cry 'hosanna' on Sunday scream 'crucify' on Friday. Do your time Myra, and save your life long enough to get a second chance."

"You know," she said of the clone. "He wouldn't have let me live."

"Which is one of the reasons why I love Yahn," replied Tali.

"You can't clone everything," finished John.

John and Tali came out of the Normandy as the rest of the crew came up to them. There were some brief exchanges with everyone assuring everyone else that they were fine. Then once things had achieved a certain level of normalcy, folks began to go their separate ways. John and Tali were just walking down the dock ramps and through the foyer talking.

"This has been . . . an interesting shore leave," mused Tali.

"Interesting? Not good, not bad? Not the best? Not the worst?"

"There has been some fun times already Yahn, but there have been some dull times too. This . . . was bad. Not boring, but not what I would call fun. But I will admit this though . . ."

"What Ducky?"

"You reminded me an awful lot about why I fell in love with you," she checked her Omni-tool and sighed. "After the last fever and sneezing yag, I'm in my suit for the most part for another three days. Which is why I'm annoyed. I can't show you yust how much I love you right now."

"Yes you can," replied John.

"Yahn? I yust said I can't make love to you for at least three days."

"And while that's disappointing Tali, it's not the end of it all. I mean, say we watch Fleet and Flotilla and I say Bellicus' lines back to you."

"Oh Yahn, that would be so sweet of you, but doing that and knowing I can't do anything about it? We can do that if you don't mind me screaming and kicking every fifteen minutes because I want you so badly. Let's go to Bullrush, and then the arcade or something . . . then maybe a walk down the ramp-way? And then maybe we can plan to get reservations at Ryuusei's when they get themselves repaired."

"If they don't see us coming and run screaming," joked John.

"Well yes, you did break their floor after all."

"Of course we could also have James and Steve over for poker. James always is up for poker."

"But we haven't had Ken and Gabby over yet. They like poker too," replied Tali.

"See you can show me you love me by playing poker with friends."

"And when I'm really feeling romantic I can bet my body."

"But what if Steve wins the hand? Or Gabby?"

"Oops!"

"You have to think these things out Ducky."

And the two of them kept walking and talking for another three hours before they realized they were hopelessly lost and needed to get a cab home.

Two nights later, John was woken by something he had never experienced with Tali before. She was whimpering in her sleep, trembling, and her hands kept trying to fend something off. He took her into his arms and held her close and then all of a sudden she woke up and burst into tears.

"Hey," he whispered. "It's okay. I'm here. I take care of the scary stuff."

"Oh Yahn," she whimpered. "It was horrible." She nuzzled up to him closer and took off her visor. Then she kissed him once. "I dreamed . . . You had turned into your clone. You were so cruel and mean. And I was still bound to you. It was . . ."

And she cried for another moment or two.

"Everything I loved about you was gone. And there was nothing left in you that I cared about. It was like I was bonded to a man who had a hole where his heart had used to be. And . . . and he was coming to me to make love and I . . . wanted to die."

John just held her and exhaled. That was the flip side. It was great having a woman who was so utterly devoted to you that she couldn't even envision leaving you. But if you turned into a monster? She would be in hell.

The next morning, Tali had recovered and was back to her chipper self. So John contacted Jack and apologized for the delays in getting together and suggested that morning for a day's visit. Jack agreed on the grounds that she could bring Eezo.

"Sure," said John. He didn't think to ask what Jack meant by Eezo.

An hour later Jack arrived as Tali was finishing boiling the water for tea. Jack walked in, admired the place, and then John found himself floored by a very large varren.

"He's from Thessia. Naturally biotic from all the element zero," explained Jack.

Tali came over and gave Jack a welcome hug and set the tea out.

"You have fun playing with Eezo now," she suggested to John.

Jack sat down with Tali while Tali poured her a cup of tea.

"Biotic Varren?" she asked as John struggled with the Varren in the background over a throw rug the Varren had decided would be fun to chew up.

"Yeah," continued Jack taking a sip of the tea. "Nice blend. No tea on earth right now, or rather not enough to go around much. Biotics make Varren short tempered so a lot of them get abused or abandoned. Can you imagine someone doing that?"

Tali nodded in sympathy while in the background a series of thumps around the corner and grunts of pain suggested John was engaged in some physical exertion with the Varren.

"I found him at a rescue place," continued Jack.

"Oh that's so sweet of you Yack," agreed Tali.

There was a curious pop and Tali noted that John had just landed seat first on the floor holding a very nice and expensive looking vase.

"I've been teaching him that it's okay to trust people," continued Jack. "He started out really angry, but by giving him lots of love, he's turning into an old softy."

The Varren charged by the piano, skidded into the windows, hit them with a rattle that sounded as if the window might break, and then turned and dashed back down the hall. There was a "woah!" from John followed by a loud thump.

"Fancy that," mused Tali.

The two girls chatted for a bit more before Jack felt it necessary to check on Eezo. He was upstairs being wrestled with by a very bruised looking John.

She looked at the Varren who happily trotted over and nuzzled her while she cooed, "Who's my badass biotic? Hmmm?"

"Yust one second Yack," suggested Tali as she took John's hand and led him into their bathroom where she applied copious iodine, hydrogen peroxide, and bandaids.

"You play so rough," she chided him.

John just looked at her.

"So," shouted Jack in the other room. "Eezo has found the couch and is settling down for his afternoon nap, want to check out the Arena Simulator?"

"Sure," replied John. "That would be relaxing."

"Yahn?"

"You try playing nice with a Biotic Varren then then tell me Combat Simulation isn't relaxing," he replied.

The three of them left for the simulator and worked off a lot of energy for an hour and then found a nice sandwich shop for an early supper and during that time, Jack caught John up on Grissom Academy. Cerberus had tried to seize the students there during the first couple of months of the Reaper invasion and John had led the Normandy team in to thwart it. Since then Jack and her class of teenage biotics had gone to earth to provide screening for troops engaged in the hit and run raids against the Reapers. She had watched over her charges carefully and so far there had been no serious or fatal injuries.

"That N7 Drill you kicked into my gut has saved more asses than I care to recall," she mused. She faced John directly. "I owe you big time for making me go through that hell."

"Earth is going to be owing you some too," suggested John. "I've talked to Anderson a couple of times and he's informed me that your students are getting high marks with the soldiers."

Jack nodded. "I'll let them know when they're not being goofballs."

"Are they still calling you the Psycotic Biotic?" he asked.

"Sometimes," she chuckled. "But they've taken to calling me mom too."

She sighed.

"This war has taught me a lot about life. I've seen guys throw themselves on grenades just so their buddies would live another day. I've had to re-think a lot of things. I still have that poison Cerberus put into me. I still get that warm feeling when I fight. But now I channel it towards fighting the Reapers. I make it work for me instead of me working for it. But there's something else to."

"What?" asked John.

"I'm not afraid to die any more," she replied. "And you want to know why?"

"Why?" asked Tali.

"I've got something worth dying for," she replied. "My students . . . they're like my kids."


	28. Chapter 28 - Quiet Times

October rolled on by and John and Tali found themselves in November. The time however was not without it's events.

The first event was the recuperation of Grunt. One of the John's side ventures during the early days of the Reaper War was to track down rumors of Rachni allegiance with the Reapers. Turned out that there had been a deliberate effort by the Reapers to indoctrinate the Rachni since they could reproduce very rapidly. Shepherd and his team had teamed up with the Krogan and liberated the Rachni from the indoctrination. The Queen, in gratitude, had sent engineers to the Crucible project. The Rachni proved very talented and Admiral Anderson was talking about the speed of construction in excited terms. There were however, more than a few indoctrinated Rachni along with transformed Ravangers which required a great deal of fighting.

Grunt had provided the rear guard and had ended up very badly hurt. He had been taken to Huerta Memorial and had finally recovered sufficiently to be able to be let out by his buddies . . . via the third story window. Fortunately Grunt landed in a lake rather than a walkway. They had then met at the Krogan War Memorial and had (as had Wrex) climbed up on the Memorial to pose. C-sec came by and threatened to fine them and Grunt, having more than his fair share of Ryncol in his bloodstream, threw his half consumed bottle at the C-sec car which exploded into flames. This seemed to be the perfect getaway car for him and his buddies who then drove this flaming C-sec sky-car through the by ways of the Presidium into the Wards where they stopped for noodles . . . both they and the sky-car still on fire. It was during their lunch that C-sec caught up with them. John was called as he was given as a reference. John paid for the damages and asked Grunt if it had been worth it.

"The noodles were too spicy," complained Grunt.

"Don't ever change Grunt," said John.

Shortly thereafter, Miranda showed up on the Citadel and through Liara's contacts, was able to meet John and Tali. She was there on her own mission, namely protecting her sister, and was as a consequence, chiefly undercover. Her father was once more on the hunt and he was firmly in Cerberus' camp. John offered to help, but Miranda informed him that there was not sufficient information yet for her to have anything concrete.

Then Tali found Kasumi one afternoon a few days later, when she was with Miranda and Liara at the Casino for a Girl's Afternoon Spree. Kasumi could not join them because she was busy transferring funds to the War Refugee Shelter Accounts. Tali made the observation that the Casino might be more than willing to give Kasumi the money if she politely asked (while Liara was too busy squealing because she kept winning big on Quasar all of a sudden and Miranda was watching over her shoulder likewise wondering how the machine could be so cooperative). Kasumi replied that it was way more fun to do it this way. Tali went home and struggled with the ethics of it all until she was able to discuss the matter with John.

"Just because your friend is doing something wrong does not mean that you have to end the friendship or shoot her," concluded John. "Telling her the right way as friendly advice was a perfectly moral response."

She felt much better after that.

Then three days later, Kasumi showed up again and asked Tali and John for help tracking down what appeared to be a spy for the Reapers in the Citadel. It turned out to be an indoctrinated Hanar diplomat. They were assisted by a Salarian member of C-sec who was not only keen on catching the spy, but he likewise had heard that Kasumi was the most notorious thief in the galaxy and he was determined to bring her to justice as well. It turned out that Cerberus had released more than a little dirt on Kasumi after the Normandy's defection. The struggle with the Hanar spy ended violently and Kasumi was able to stage a sudden death which got C-sec off her back. After that was resolved, Kasumi left them a special extra-net address which would always reach her just in case. And she once again vanished (literally) from their lives.

And the news of the Reaper war continued to pour in. Batarian, Human, and Turian systems were under a constant state of assault, but while the pressure was continually on, the three species were gradually recovering from the initial shock of the assault. This was in part due to the fact that the first battle in the Reaper war, the Battle of the Citadel, had ended with a Councilor victory. The death of Sovereign had produced two events of strategic significance. The first was one which Javik observed was absent from his cycle, namely the holding of the Citadel which kept the Reapers from destroying the central authority of the galaxy at the first blow. The second, was an understanding that Reapers could be killed if you did it right. That was more psychological than military in significance but what it did was give the Allied Navies hope.

The strategic problem had to do with the fact that the Reapers were going for specific targets, applying overwhelming force to them, and the value of those targets, mystical, physical, national, or ideological, created this horrible desire to defend what was most dear. In this war, the united species had to be willing to sacrifice everything to not be where the Reapers were advancing. This was a constant struggle but one which had to be engaged in. While a single Reaper was vulnerable to a heavy concentration of species ships, if the fleets met the Reapers head on, then it was a slaughter.

The tactics for the Allied Navies were simple, twenty frigates and five dreadnoughts would be brought up against a Reaper dreadnought. That Reaper dreadnought would then be defeated and destroyed, but it would be at the cost of five or six ships. Over time, the Reapers would still win by shear attrition, but in the mean time, a planet which had been liberated from that one Reaper dreadnought could be taken back by ground forces who were being for being, just as capable as any one Reaper soldier. A liberated planet ended harvesting until the Reapers were forced to come back for it.

Thus the Reaper tactics were to maintain a massive presence on a planet they were seeking to take, which meant that they could not be elsewhere. So long as the Allied Species could maintain a resistance on that planet, that tied the Reapers down to specific targets. This in turn bought the Allies time.

John began pouring over the galaxy maps blowing them up in holographic displays so he could spend hours studying them. There were nearly five hundred systems in the galaxy which were occupied by the various stellar species on one or more of the planets in orbit around the star. In the overall scheme of the Galaxy, the Reapers were only attacking two dozen or so of those planets. But on those two dozen planets, were billions of people of various species. Rescue and evacuation efforts required full military scale planning and the casualties were always high. There were close to two hundred systems where Reapers were routinely sending patrols into however. That was where the ambushes were set up. The crazy thing about the ambushes of course was the fact that the Reapers had the means to avoid nearly all of them. All they had to do was retreat. They were faster than all but the smallest fighter craft. But here was where the Reapers showed their most profound and critical flaw. They would not retreat, they would attack. They had so convinced themselves that they were the pinnacle of enlightenment and being, and thus could not be threatened, that they understood retreat only as a theory.

John often got the computer recreates of those battles, and would spend time analyzing the various maneuvers which the fleets would engage in during these killer ambushes. The Reaper response was almost always predictable. They would charge right in and grapple a ship and then tear it apart with their beam weapon. Then they would go for another one. Successful fleet tactics meant fluid captain response, flee when the Reaper was heading for the ship, and chase when the Reaper was pursuing another ship. And while the Reaper was most vulnerable at the weapons port, there were very few captains who could fire 'down the throat' at a charging Reaper and live to boast about it afterwards.

The introduction of the Geth and Quarian ships brought more numbers to the United Fleets, and likewise Geth tactics began to improve the odds for the fleets as well. The Geth were capable of rapid analysis and knew just how to squeeze the maximum amount of bang out of the fewest ships. In addition, Quarian engineering was able to transform hundreds of alliance civilian ships into some form of military function, bringing some of the armored merchant vessels (who had been designed to trade in pirate infested systems) to frigate and destroyer class power and defense.

And so the galactic fight began to mirror Earth's fight. The Reapers would aim for a specific system, everything would be employed to evacuate as much as possible. Once the Reapers had landed on their targeted planet, the goal would be to pull as many out as possible of the cities and into the countryside. In space, the fleets would stay away from the Reaper forces until they could catch a single Reaper alone. So far the Asari, Salarian, Volus, Hanar, and Elcor systems remained untouched. And those systems were where the United Fleets would fall back to recuperate. Javik noted that this was the Prothean response as well. Ultimately however, the United Species would lose. But they could do what they were doing for hundreds of years, just like the Protheans did.

"That's why the Reapers have never needed to change their tactics," mused John to Tali and Javik one afternoon as they were looking at the battle lines on Earth. Our entire population will end up harvested, indoctrinated, or transformed into husks. In the end, we run out of people which is our most strategic resource."

"So unless we get the Spanish Conquistadors sailing in," suggested Tali who had remembered John's reference to that bit of history, "The Aztecs depopulate Mexico."

"That is why my people tried to put me and a million other Protheans into stases," stated Javik.

"You know," observed John. "If you survived, it's possible that there are others who survived as well. If we find them, all we need is you and one female, and over time, the Protheans can rebuild."

Javik looked at him.

"Interesting option," he replied. "Though I wonder why you would suggest it as we would take over again."

"By the time you were powerful enough to 'take over'," replied John smiling. "Thousands of years would have passed and by then you would have as a species been shaped by your experiences in the Galaxy."

"You honestly think all species can work together?" chuckled Javik.

"It won't always work," admitted John. "But if there's one thing that Earth history has taught, it's that humanity always does better when all the nations work together. Empires rise and fall and they always fall because they get bound to their success and lose the ability to innovate and eventually succumb to their tolerated vices."

"The Protheans did not," replied Javik.

"You did, to the Reapers," replied Tali.

"That's different," refuted Javik.

"This cycle remains to be seen," replied John. "The victory will come in this cycle. I have it on good authority."

"This appeal to your deity is absurd," suggested Javik. There wasn't a single member of the crew of the Normandy who was not, on some level, familiar with John's retelling of the events of his death and return. It was his usual answer for why he remained confidant. Javik however had expressed persistent doubt. Now he was apparently going to challenge John on that point. "In my cycle, religion was the crutch of the weak."

"In this cycle," retorted John. "Religion is the common sense of the species. Think about it, you'll find there is no other real rational alternative."

"If you are reasonable, then why don't these miracles you speak of on occasion exist? You examine each one and you'll find a scientific explanation."

"Well of course," laughed John. "If God is going to cure my blindness by a dip in the spring at Lourdes, then energy must be spent to repair the damaged optical nerves, thus producing a measurable medical result. Thus the scientific 'explanation'. The problem is that it doesn't happen outside of the religious context. You don't find sudden nerve regeneration happening among atheists."

"Miranda scientifically rebuilt you," replied Javik. "There was no religious component."

"There wasn't?" suggested John. "The only reason why it worked was because I agreed to go back."

"So you claim," replied Javik.

"So you're left suggesting that I'm telling a lie?" queried John with a grin.

"As part of the rebuilding your mind, deluded by this need to have a great father figure, you dreamed the event as part of your struggle to make sense of it all."

"And you were there to observe this entire process," continued John.

Tali's head was shifting back and forth between the two. She was having a hard time understanding why John was obviously enjoying himself. She wasn't sure about Javik.

"It is the only rational explanation," retorted Javik.

"Wrong," replied John. "It is one of two rational explanations."

"Deity is not rational," stated Javik.

"You have yet to give a rational reason why it isn't," suggested John.

"Miranda rebuilt you, you did not 'rise' from the dead," Javik restated his point.

"Let us, for the sake of your argument," replied John with a grin. "Assume that your explanation was correct, namely that I dreamed the entire thing. After all, once upon a time heart damage was unrepairable after a heart attack. But then adult stem cells proved able to regenerate the damaged tissue and hearts were restored to full functionality, in fact, thanks to the rejuvenation quality of the adult stem cells, even better. Medical science reached a point where I was rebuilt. I'll grant you that just for the fun of it. Your entire point is based upon the notion that as science advances the supernatural retreats because the supernatural is merely a presumption to answer those natural processes which have, as of yet, not been understood. You have to understand, Atheism has been in Earth's history since at least 1,000 BC when the first commentary on it was penned. That argument was being tossed around long before humans had this institution called science. Back then it was stated that there was a natural explanation, not a supernatural."

"The problem," continued John. "Is that your observation that Miranda rebuilt me is merely a restatement of 'there's a scientific explanation' which I've already debunked, both by my own personal experience, which you can not rationally dispute - though you insist upon trying to - and the undeniable fact that these events which Atheists deny as miracles do not manifest themselves around Atheists. For if blindness were suddenly cured by a spontaneous regeneration of nerves entirely by scientific reasons, then there would be the evidence to support it. Sight would not be restored to those born blind just by dipping into the spring at Lourdes. For example, it would happen at a special bend in the Thames. It would occur at the source of the Mississippi. You would have people flocking to the mouth of the Nile. It wouldn't be just Catholic statues which move and bless congregations, National statues of great heroes would do the same thing on occasion. It just wouldn't be the statues of Mary which cried over the crimes of humanity, you would see the statues of Lincoln, Louis IX, and Henry V crying as well. In the end, you have the same problem, namely the very verifiable fact that this stuff happens only in a religious context."

"This argument is foolish, there are Reapers to fight," finished Javik.

"Agreed," replied John.

And after a moment's hesitation, the two of them once again focused upon the map.

Later that night, as John was getting ready for bed he mused to himself, "Well at least I can still win an argument with someone."

"And that is sugyesting what?" queried Tali from the bathroom. She was standing in front of the mirror brushing her hair in her white flannel nightgown. She had recovered from her prior issues and had over the last two weeks, adapted sufficiently to be able to sleep without her suit.

"I was suggesting you win most of our disputes," joked John. "You don't mind being the intellectual giant of the family do you?"

"Well so long as you phrase it in those terms," she replied smiling.

"I thought you wouldn't object," he answered. He got into the bed and lay back. Tali came into the bedroom and walked over to her side, and slipped into it. She snuggled up to him and he looked at her face.

"You're hair is so cool," he observed running his fingers through it. "It feels like I'm running my hands through feathers, without the quills."

"How can you keep complimenting me?" asked Tali with a sigh. "I see these pictures of these Asari models, these human models, the vid performers, the singers and dancers, and I look like none of them and yet, you think I'm pretty. Why? Human skin runs from shades of pink to brown and yet you like mine? It's none of those colors. I see so many Asari and Human faces which are sweet and feminine and yet you like mine?"

"You object?" asked John with a grin. "Should I stop complimenting you and start comparing you with all those other women?"

"Well no," she stammered. "I like the compliments, I just don't always understand . . ."

"Because I don't just see your pink lipped mouth, Tali. I don't just see your delicate nose or those big glowing white eyes of yours all sparkling with flashes from every color in the rainbow, I also see your soul beneath. And it was your soul I fell in love with first, remember? I said I loved you before I ever saw your face, I didn't even get to see your face until after we got back together on the Cerberus Normandy."

"I was convinced you thought I was ugly and then you said I was beautiful and I had to kiss you," she recollected. "But I see what everyone else says is beautiful and I don't measure up and I know it."

"No, you see what other people say is beautiful and you think you have to be that way even though your husband says you're just fine the way you are. And I'm not alone, Garrus has complimented you as has Joker. And Samantha went totally into hysterics when she saw you she thought you were so pretty. Remember? We were afraid she might make a pass at you. But even so Kitten, you don't have to please anyone else, you only have to please me. That's the nice thing about being a couple. We only have to worry about what the other one is thinking. I don't have to look rugged and dashing and handsome to any other woman, I only have to do that for you. And as long as you think I'm pleasing, I don't have to worry about what any other woman thinks."

"You sure?"

"Tali? What happened that made you start to worry about this? This isn't just coming out of nowhere. You've been quite happy letting me tell you how beautiful you are for the past few weeks now, all of a sudden, you're worried again?"

"Samantha and I got together for lunch and then went to the Castle Arcade where she got into a tournament," began Tali. "Samantha was convinced she would be thrown out in the first few rounds, but she kept winning."

"So what was this game?"

"It's called Kepesh-Yakshi and it's sort of like chess, only invented by the Asari some time after they started colonization," explained Tali. "So we were down to the last few games in the tourney and in comes Polgara T'Suzsa . . ."

"Who?"

"Don't know myself, but Samantha knew her and there's no hate lost between the two of them," explained Tali. "Polgara informed Traynor that she would lose in less than twenty moves."

"Oh?"

"And since I was with Samantha and giving her encouragement, Polgara called me a bucket head and remarked that the reason why I wore the visor was to keep people from getting sick."

"Ooooo nasty twist," agreed John.

"Samantha came to my defense and told her that as she had seen my face she knew first hand that I was beautiful, and then Polgara suggested I was yust as deviant as Samantha."

"Sounds like a first class Asari Bitch," observed John. "That's with a capital B. The Asari are mono-gendered, why would she even _care_ that Samantha is attracted to women?"

"What hurt was that it seemed like most of the crowd was agreeing with her," sighed Tali. "I felt so angry and impotent so I shouted out that I was the wife of Commander Shepherd and Polgara laughed and informed me that any Quarian thief could make that claim as we all looked alike."

"What did Samantha say?"

"She said that I was telling the truth and Polgara smirked and suggested that if I really was the wife of Commander Shepherd, then I could kibitz since every one knew that your wife was an Admiral and that would mean skill at playing the game."

"Oh?"

"Of course then Polgara observed that it might be the only chance Samantha had to win."

"So Samantha was deftly maneuvered into a no win situation, if you helped and she won, it was because you helped. If you helped and she lost, it was because you were not Admiral Tali, but just a bucket head Quarian. And if you didn't help, then . . ." John sighed. "My poor baby girl."

He gave her a firm hug and pulled her closer.

"So what did you do?" he asked.

"You won't hate me?"

"Tali? Did you get your shotgun?"

"No," she said it in a little girl voice.

"Then I don't think I can hate you," he replied. "Though even then I'd still love you. I'd just be annoyed with you because you would have to go to jail and I would be without my little hug monkey in the evenings."

"How about asking her if being flat chested was all the ragh among Asari gamer girls?"

"Was it true?"

"Well she had something, I wasn't exactly comparing for the most part, but it was the only thing I could think of, short of sugyesting she was overweight and I have . . . um . . . wider hips than her," sighed Tali.

Then she paused. Then she looked into John's eyes.

"You're not saying anything, Yahn . . ." she observed.

"You have very beautiful eyes, Tali. They are sparkling with little red and yellow glints from the cars sailing by the windows out in the living room."

Tali smiled and kissed him.

"And he saves at the last second!" thought John to himself.

"So what did she do after that?" asked John. "Polgara I mean."

"I think the flat chested remark must have gotten to her, because Samantha won the game in 23 moves by taking the home planet."

"That's my Tali girl, clouding gamer girl minds at the Arcade," chuckled John.

"Well it wasn't a very nice remark," sighed Tali.

"But it was acceptable since it was only what she had been dumping on you. Now granted it might have been more good to just take the stings, but you met words with words, and no more than words. Besides, you definitely have an advantage when it comes to bust size."

"Oh? I don't think they are that big."

"It's not the size I'm thinking of Tali, I'm thinking of the fact that you wear a suit which molds to your body leaving no doubt that you have a very cute pair of breasts."

"Now you said you didn't know that until I got drunk and started to take off my suit," observed Tali.

"Well visual confirmation is always nice, but I mean face it girl, your suit molds to your body. There is no doubt as to the location, size, and shape of those cute breasts of yours. Present Asari fashions tend to flatten the chest with those long lines. Hers could have been superior to yours in all aspects. But today's Asari outfits drape over the front, they don't mold themselves to it. The joke being is that she probably never linked your comment's believability to fashion choice."

Tali sighed and snuggled for a second.

"So did Samantha win the tournament?"

"Yes, she did, and she was thrilled. She wants to know if we could keep the trophy here in the apartment. She has no room for it on the Normandy."

"Tell her we'll find a place on the Normandy for it. By honoring her on the Normandy, we also honor the crew. We'll build a set of shelves by the memorial wall, so we won't just remember those who have fallen, we'll remember those who have achieved something."

"She'll like that I'm sure," agreed Tali. She looked into his eyes for a moment and had little mischievous grin. "You're such a good man," she mused. "I think I can trust your opinion to be honest." She sat up, pulled off her nightgown and tossed it to the side.

"Are my breasts still as cute as the first time you saw them?"

"What if I think they've gotten cuter? Is that acceptable?"

"Entirely," she said as she once again snuggled up to him and began to kiss him. He naturally felt obligated to kiss her back and the next thing they knew . . .

Forty five minutes later, John was on his back and Tali was snuggled up next to him. Her eyes were closed, her breathing steady, and her heelrou faint which suggested she was about to fall asleep, though John on occasion wondered if the heelrou noise she made continued into the light stages of sleep. It was that quiet light trilling noise which he always found so distinct and special about her. It communicated so much. It told him she was content, secure, relaxed, but most of all, happy. It told him she felt safe, but also loved. It wasn't like a cat's purr, because a cat's purr was mono-t0ned. But like a cat's purr, it was clearly connected with her breathing. It was as if once she reached a certain state of relaxation, security, and love, her vocal chords would just vibrate a little as her breathing passed over them. He thought that was the case because he had noted that her heelrou rose and lowered in pitch with her breathing.

He wondered if he would have felt so lucky or special or unique if he had a wife who was human like him. But he didn't speculate too long on that, there was no way to know anything about such an alternative. He didn't have any illusions about that crazy romantic notion which was so popular that there was a certain special someone out there waiting for you and if you connected with the wrong person, you would be miserable. Rather, he understood that a relationship was about two people liking each other, being attracted to each other, and then learning to get along as pleasantly as possible with each other. It was clear that some had a harder time doing that, but at the same time, it was also clear that it was a set of decisions one made. After all, Tali had a very bad habit of punching him in the arm when she was upset with him. If he had chosen to let that impact his life with her, they might never have bonded. Or now they would be fighting like cats and dogs. Likewise she was far more emotional than anyone he knew. There wasn't a week that passed when she didn't cry at least once if not twice or when she wasn't angry about something and frequently taking it out on him if he was available. And while they might still be their honeymoon phase, given the length of time they had spent separated either by distance or suit, it was seemed that she was more inclined to passion than any human girl he had experienced. Of course he had never lived with a human woman in his past, but he had noticed that human women were more inclined to passion the week after their period and far less inclined during. Tali didn't have a period. She didn't know what he had been talking about when he had approached the subject.

Her emotional intensity could have been a point of contention. But he had chosen to see the good and not the bad of it. Her being angry and punching him in the arm was bad, but holding her when she cried was good. And she was happy far more than angry and bouncing and dancing about which was entertaining to watch. So that was good. And he certainly had no complaints about a girl who liked making love at the frequency she did. And even if she wasn't in the mood when he got into the mood, he found that all he had to do was hold her and kiss her enough and she got very much into the mood shortly thereafter, shortly meaning in under five minutes.

And she was smart, that too was good. She was always thinking about others, that was more than just good, that was practically beatific. She was determined to share the apartment with their friends. And she did so almost on a daily basis. Oh he found all the company at times a little wearing, but he had his little corner upstairs with his desk. He could retreat when he got tired of the chatter. And when it came down to it, everyone else was stuck in a small hotel room or their bunk on the Normandy which was being refurnished from bow to stern. He got the distinct impression that the crew really appreciated these little sessions in the apartment.

Dishwashing . . . that was a chore. Cooking together . . . that was a joy. Her skin . . . silky soft to the touch. Her immune system . . . a constant source of concern. A mixture of good and bad, and all he had to do to make his life hell was to focus on the bad. All he had to do to make life heavenly, was to focus on the good. It was just that simple. He smiled and looked at her sleeping face. She had just the faintest hint of smile on her lips. It was just a girl's face. Her lips were not full and sensual like the popular models. Her nose was not petite and porcelain like the popular models. Her eyes were big enough, and they were solid white. There was no emerald green or sapphire blue or golden brown iris. Her skin was not that healthy tan or smooth cream blue like the popular models. But it was the face of a woman who loved him, and loved him deeply, and that covered a host of shortcomings, if he actually chose to see them as such. And why would he not? There was nothing wrong with her nose, it just wasn't the shape which the fashionistas said it had to be. There was nothing wrong with her mouth, it just wasn't the shape that the fashionistas said it needed to be. Her hair couldn't be put in those magnificent and elaborate coifs which the fashionistas said was beautiful, but was that fashionista hair as soft as eider down when you put your hands through it?

He was feeling very sleepy now. Her heelrou had stopped, all that he could hear was her faint breathing. Upstairs, Javik was pacing in the guest bedroom. John could understand what Javik was going through, even though he suspected Javik did not. Javik saw a military situation which he had experienced in his cycle, that of relentless foe who simply crushed what was before him, who slowly ground down even the most dogged of resistance. An enemy who had numbers and did not fear to spend them. An enemy who had superior armor, superior weapons, and who turned the strength of their foes against them, transforming the most precious resource of a people, namely the people themselves, into warships and soldiers. Javik saw this and reasonably concluded that there was no hope barring some miraculous technological discovery. Javik had been molded by that relentless drive by the Reapers, that constant struggle to outfight or outwit a foe that refused to be outfought or outwit. A foe which seemed to make a mockery of the notion that the United Allies would finish this war with their honor intact.

Yet he had been sent back to assure the Reaper defeat. He did not know how that would happen, he didn't even know if he would live to see it. He only knew that Tali would die happy which he suspected meant that he would survive her. He didn't like that part of the equation. Now that she was in his arms, he didn't want to imagine a night where he was alone without any trace of her left. For a second, he found himself grieving her future death. Then he mentally chided himself. He had been in heaven. He had seen that magnificent city, and had been shown countless stars in the sky which were homes to all the species in the galaxy, if not the entire universe. Yes, she would die before him, but then he would follow her. And they would be together again, together in a land where nothing could possibly separate them. He had more assurance of his fate than any other being in the galaxy right now. And realized that little tidbit of knowledge was one of the things which had given him way more courage than he could have possibly imagined.

He looked out the open bedroom door, through the windows beyond the living room the sky-cars flew by, their red and white lights flashing across the wall. Like his grandparent's bedroom, once upon a time. His right hand's fingers were gently caressing Tali's shoulders, the skin feeling like soft down or fuzzy chamois. Her breathing was soft and steady.

"I love you Tali, he whispered.

And then he was asleep.

November would have passed quietly if one had stayed in the apartment and just had friends over who talked about sports or fashions. But there was a war on and while November had it's quiet evenings and romantic afternoons and playful mornings, the threat continued to loom over everything. As the days passed, John had more and more concerns that the Reapers had so far not tried to take the Citadel. Why? He discussed this question constantly with every single one of the crew, there were several evenings when everyone was present around the couches by the fireplace (since that was the only place you could fit everyone) It wasn't a question of them not being able to take it. Everyone present knew that the Reapers could take anything they wanted.

"The only thing I can conclude," mused Tali at the end of a late November discussion. "Is that while the Citadel has millions, they are all different species. It's not worth the Reaper's time to harvest them right now. Why spend resources to get a little when you can spend those same resources to get a lot?"

No one could argue that.

The fourth Sunday of November marked the first Sunday of Advent and suddenly Tali was reminded that Christmas was coming. As she walked into the church for Mass with John that Sunday she discovered that the entire interior was festooned with garlands of pine and holly. When she walked up to one of the decorations and examined it, she found it to be genuine. This was so curious, given that she doubted it could have been imported from Earth, she proceeded to activate her Omni-tool and begin examining it. It was at this point that a man in a white robe with a purple sash came up to her. She recognized the man as one of those who assisted the Priest, sometimes read from their book, and even did the instruction on one of the Sundays she had attended.

"Mrs. Shepherd," he began. They had quickly been remembered by all the Church officials since of course they were the only Human/Quarian couple in the church and likewise, John's fame in the Citadel was well established. "Could you wait until after Mass is over with before you examine the decorations?"

"But it hasn't begun yet," she objected.

"But we are about to begin, and your examinations might take longer than you suspect," he said.

"All I want to know is where you got them?"

"There's a Catholic geneticist who offered to build them for us given the present unpleasantness."

That made Tali pause.

"Can we talk about this after Mass?" she asked.

"I believe we can, Mrs. Shepherd."

And an hour and fifteen minutes later she was in the Sacristy with John talking to who she learned was Deacon Kurisara. The Sacristy was a room she had never been inside of before, it seemed to be mostly a room for cupboards and wardrobes and chests for the vestments and items used in the worship ceremonies. John was quietly standing by, waiting for his wife to finish the discussion.

"Now Deacon," she began. "You told me that all those fronds were made?"

"Yes, Mrs. Shepherd," he replied.

"But . . ." began Tali who was having a hard time with this, or so John suspected. "The cost?"

"I suspect there was some cost involved with the genetic reconstruction," mused the Deacon. "I didn't ask, he merely offered at the beginning of November and Father Nekuma accepted the gift."

"But there are so many people suffering right now," she observed. "All that could have been turned into medicine for wounds, food for the hungry . . ."

"Indeed it could have," agreed the Deacon. "But this was what the donor requested, and . . . well let's go into the Sanctuary for a moment and look at it."

And so the three of them walked out of the Sacristy and stood at the back of the main room where the worship took place.

"Are the decorations pretty?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered.

"How many poor do you think come to Mass?" he asked.

Tali did not know and said so.

"Over two thirds of our congregation is what are known as the working poor. Doing minor jobs in the wards for a few credits an hour," he explained. "They live in small apartments, perhaps ten meters by ten meters total, broken into bedrooms, living rooms, and kitchens. Some of them have a communal kitchen they work in or bathroom."

Tali shrugged. "That's yust the way we all lived on the Migrant Fleet."

"Then you know about poverty, you've lived it," observed the Deacon.

"I suppose," replied Tali quietly, almost to herself. "I didn't think of it as poverty . . . Until . . ."

"Until you began to see others with more things on your pilgrimage?"

"You know of a Quarian pilgrimagh?"

"Indeed we do, we helped many of them when they came to the shelters we have in the wards," replied the Deacon.

Tali found this an interesting turn of phrase. Her people were not 'your people' they were 'them'. At the same time, she was Mrs. Shepherd, which she understood to be an honorific title granted to all human wives. She found it interesting that the deacon seemed to think of her as just a human in a suit, even though she was certain he knew she was Quarian.

"Then you understand about the need to take care of precious resources then?" queried Tali. "And if so, how do you yustify this?" and she gestured to the entire festooned interior of the Sanctuary.

"How much beauty did you have on the Migrant Fleet?" asked the Deacon.

"We have some decoration, to make the steel interiors more . . . livable," replied Tali. She mentally reminded herself that the proper term was now 'had' as the Quarians were settling on Rannoch.

"But not everyone has decorations right?"

"Well of course, there was only so much cloth you could spend on tapestries and rugs and shawls," replied Tali.

"Were there places on the Fleet where people could go to see beauty?"

Tali paused. She was having a hard time figuring out what it was he was asking.

"Parks?" suggested John.

"We had recreation areas, we had meeting areas, but we didn't have something which was just, pretty. It would have been a waste of resources better used elsewhere," she replied.

"Well the thing you have to understand," continued the Deacon, who seemed to have found his way to explain it, "Like your people, the working poor don't have something which is just pretty, for them, except the Church. "They can not afford roses, but they can come here and smell them. They can not afford gold and silver decorations, but here they can come here to touch them. And they do these things because this is 'their' church. This is the one place where they can be surrounded by wealth and beauty which is in some fashion theirs. Indeed, on earth, if you were to go into the cities or country side, you would find the same rule applies. The poorer the population of faithful, the more beauty they put into their church."

"Even so, the gold could go for food," mused Tali.

"And some rich man would have it instead of them," replied the Deacon. "In his own private safe where no one could see it. Why should the rich man have all the gold cups? We have one that every poor man drinks from when he takes the precious blood of Christ. Our job is to teach men how to live well, and they choose to be taught in a beautiful classroom. We do not presume to tell them that they must be taught in the rain outside because the wood, stone, clay, marble, gold, silver, paint, canvas, and paper used to make the church could be sold for food and used to feed the poor."

"Well," replied Tali laughing nervously, "I don't presume to argue that you can't have a building to worship in."

"There are some on Earth who have, and still do," replied the Deacon. "And some of them likewise have come to the Citadel and are demanding the same now of us." He paused and smiled ironically. "There are those who presume to tell us what the poor who come into this building are really thinking and wanting. And not a one of them is known by name by any of the congregation here." He sighed. "Mr. Jacobson of Earth's Parliament in exile here on the Citadel tells me that I don't care enough about what Mrs. Olais needs, even though I just spent three hours yesterday helping Mrs. Olais get her son to the doctor and get his medical expenses covered. Mrs. Olais is in Mass every other day. Mr. Jacobson has yet to darken my door."

"Now that's just silly," agreed Tali. "Anyway, I was curious, so I asked. And thanks for answering."

"Anytime," replied the Deacon.

The two of the walked out.

"Tens of thousands of credits to build those garlands cell by cell," sighed Tali. "And all that for something which will only last for a few weeks. It seems so alien to me."

"But I'm your alien," suggested John.

Tali giggled. "Yes you are. I guess that explains it then. It's something good humans do. They make sacrifices which seem to have only an aesthetic value. We Quarians don't do that. At least not that I know of. Maybe in a few years, once we're settled back home, that will change. It wouldn't be that bad an idea."

"I guess we won't be getting a real Christmas tree," mused John.

"No, we won't," agreed Tali. "The fact that we can't afford a few million credits is the first reason why. But if you can find one which looks pretty enough which can be put away and used again next year, I won't have a problem with it. Provided you don't spend more than a thousand."

"So a little beauty is okay?" asked John.

"A little," replied Tali in a teasing tone. "And for that reason, when we get home, I'm going to deep clean that blackhead you have on your left cheek that has been driving me crazy the past ten minutes."

John groaned. Tali's idea of a deep cleaning felt like a trip to the dentist who super-sized his drills.

So John began to get the apartment ready for Christmas. He told the crew that there would be a Christmas party with a white elephant gift exchange and it would be on Christmas evening. Everyone said they would be coming. And this included several of the crew who had been on the Cerberus Normandy as well. Miranda and Jack and Kelly all said they could make it. Jacob sent his regards, his wife was expecting and the Reapers had sent a couple of patrols into the system. They had been ambushed and killed by the Allied Fleets, but everyone was terrified that the Reapers were probing to find out if the planet was worth harvesting shortly.

John took Tali out for the Christmas Tree shopping. And after a bit of time, they found a holographic display which looked so real you were certain you could reach out and touch it. Of course the hand went right through the image, but in the corner with carefully arranged gifts underneath it, you didn't know. What John liked about it was that you could have an ornament on it which said, "Our First Christmas" with a picture of him and Tali on it.

"But it's not our first Christmas," observed Tali as he was programming that into the tree. "It's our second."

"I've predated it to 2185," replied John. "And besides, I get to see your face on the Christmas tree, that's a real present."

Tali liked that compliment a lot. Which really helped make the next hour go more tolerably for John when, a few moments later, she found out he had spent 2,000 credits on Christmas presents for her when he started pulling out all the gift wrapped packages which had her name (or nicknames) on them and putting them under the tree. There were several reasons why Tali got upset. The first was that it was 2,000 credits, which was a month of taxes, energy, and groceries for the two of them in the apartment. The second was that there was no way she could justify spending that much on gifts for him and she felt horribly guilty because she only had four for him. The third was that her Quarian sensibilities told her she had no reason to feel guilty and it was undeniable evidence that it was all his fault. And finally, she had a dozen packages now under that tree addressed to her filled with all sorts of things she wanted to know were in them and she had to wait until Christmas morning to find out. John of course was not privy to the last three reasons, only the first. And Tali made sure that was the only reason she yelled at him over. John seemed to take it in stride, weathering the storm like he usually did, letting her punch him in the arm when his defense got too 'snide' in her view, but otherwise just letting her vent for the most part. She noted that he did not yell back as much as he used to. And then she began to suspect that because he did that, she got over it more quickly. Then she wondered if he had figured it out that far and he was deliberately not fighting back as much because he figured it would be over with sooner and that of course meant she was being manipulated.

But when she got ready to open her mouth to accuse him of not fighting back enough she was so utterly overwhelmed with the absurdity of the accusation that she burst into giggles and quite forgave him.

Later that evening, after Garrus and Liara had left (for they had been invited over for dinner). Tali stood looking at the tree. She watched the lights blink on and off, noted the sparkling tinsel, and finally looked at all the ornaments.

"Yahn?" She asked. "Why a tree?"

"Well," replied John. "The evergreen is picked because it does not 'die' in winter and so symbolized eternal life. The ornaments represent the fruits from the Garden of Eden and the Eucharist which is the new Bread of Life. And then of course the tinsel represents winter and icicles. Finally, the lights are supposed to represent the stars in the night sky that shown on the birth. That's why you have the big star up on top. According to the story, there was a new bright star which shone on the night that Jesus was born. The gifts of course come from the three Magi, ancient pagan priests, who brought gifts for the new God-child born."

"Everything has a religious significance except the tinsel," observed Tali. "Why is that?"

"I don't know for sure," replied John. "But I heard that it has to do with the fact that when Aluminum was first processed, it was so expensive that people used it to decorate their trees with as a sign of wealth. A sort of 'look at me I'm so rich'. Of course no one uses aluminum for tinsel any more. But it's pretty, so people keep doing it."

"It is nice," sighed Tali. "Good thing we don't have a "Our Second Christmas" ornament though.

"Why not?"

"It would be a picture of us yelling at each other," she quipped.

"It could also be a picture of us kissing and making up," replied John.

"But I note you haven't done that yet," she observed.

"The picture?"

"The kissing," she replied softly as she turned to face him and wrapped her arms around his back, and then griped his shoulders with her fingers.

So he did.

Tali found the next few weeks distinct. On the outside the Silversun Ward remained a place filled with lights and walkways and flashing and distraction. But in their apartment, there was that warmth of home and security. John continued to decorate. He found more things to hang off of walls, and simply filled up the entire living area with reds and greens and glittery garlands.

"You did this on the first Normandy," recalled Tali. "I remember."

"Yeah," agreed John. He was sitting on the couch looking at the window garland strands reflecting the lights of the ward as they glittered. "The entire town would decorate the streets and Mom always decorated the house when we were growing up and she would have us help. I loved Christmas. Looking out at the Silversun, and seeing no Christmas decorations is a hard thing."

"We didn't do it so much on the Cerberus Normandy," Tali continued to recollect.

"Didn't have as much to decorate with. Remember that Miranda found Christmas decorations a waste of space better put to use holding extra ammo."

Tali simply rested her head on John's shoulder.

"Simply sitting next to you being quiet," she pondered. "I'm enjoying that more and more. How about you?"

"Well there's only so much time you can spend playing omni-tool games," agreed John.

"You're trying to get punched aren't you?"

"I'm playing around with the idea. I like seeing what you do when I give silly answers."

"I have decided something," she continued.

"What?"

"We will have a fire place in our home on Rannoch."

"You mean you don't like these wide picture windows showing the traffic flashing by at all hours of the night?"

"Yahn, the only time I get the giggles about all that traffic flying by our window is when I think of coming up with a suitable distraction, like seducing you on this couch, so some poor driver notices us just briefly and gets distracted and creates a very big pileup of collisions."

"Tali," said John with a grin. "You may not realize it, but is exactly what happened when my grandfather was a newly wed."

"Oh?"

"Mom told me about it when I was a teenager during one of her 'it's important to keep modest in public' talks I got a lot of because I thought in order to be a stud dude, I had to go around with a ripped up t-shirt."

"So you walked out in traffic in a ripped up T-shirt and embarrassed your grandfather so there was a pile up?"

"No not me, grandmother exposed herself to grandfather during their newlywed period as she dropped him off to work. From what mom said, she opened up her shirt and held it wide. Her lack of discretion was of sufficient public observation that she distracted another driver who drove through a coffee shop."

Tali spent the next few moments snuggled up to John giggling about that. Then she closed the blinds to the big picture windows and proceeded to make love to him on the couch.

And so December passed. Christmas morning Tali opened her presents and found her self the owner of three pairs of loose baggy jeans, two new ponchos, a very nice bracelet, three fuzzy sweaters. a lighter nightgown, and a pair of sandals designed for a girl with two long toes. John got a new ship model to construct, upgrades on his Omni-tool, a ring formed from bits of metal from the Normandy, and three pairs of socks. Then Tali pulled out two more little gifts.

The first was a new copy framed, of the old picture she had given him prior, the one when she was smiling at him in front of the sun on Rannoch. It was slightly larger than the first and in a nicer frame. The second was an album filled with the photos he had taken of her in that little inlet.

"This is one album you won't be showing the kids," he suggested.

"No," she replied giggling.


	29. Chapter 29 - Melancholy Music

January 3rd, 2187, at 0554 in the morning. John was leaning on the balustrade looking at the Normandy steaming up. Shore leave was over. They were leaving the Citadel.

"I need a soundtrack with melancholy music," he thought.

There was the quiet tapping of rapid skipping or bouncing walking and a pair of fingers curled around his shoulder bones. He smiled. Only a Tali could do that.

"Kitten?" he asked.

"Yahn," she sighed. "I've been remembering when I was preparing to leave the fleet. It was just an ordinary day for an ordinary young Quarian girl about to go on her pilgrimagh. Rannoch was a far away dream. There were no Reapers. My fears were ordinary. My likes were those of a young girl."

Behind them, James and Kaiden were walking by in deep conversation.

"Serving on a human ship. Bonding with a human captain. Talking about building a home on Rannoch. And working to save the galaxy. It's been quite the ride hasn't it?"

She gave him a little squeeze.

"The best," he said softly. He turned and looked at Silversun. Would it look this good the next time he returned? Or would it still be here? Or was it because he was leaving it that it looked so good. Did he recall it looked good when he first drove up to the apartment?

Tali walked on ahead and caught up with Liara and the two leaned in and began to conspire, or so John and Garrus liked to suggest to each other. As John watched her walk away he remembered the lyrics to an old song his grandmother liked to sing when he was being tucked into bed.

_She had no rings upon her fingers,_  
_She had diamonds in her eyes,_  
_She had no money to be reckoned with,_  
_She had castles in the skies._

That had been Tali, and still was in so many ways.

"You know now that those engineers are done with the refits, all the ship's guns are going to need to be calibrated again," suggested another voice behind him.

"Hello Garrus," said John smiling as he began to walk towards the Normandy.

"You're still not looking at me and I know human peripheral vision is not that good. So what was it that gave me away?"

"I haven't the foggiest," replied John chuckling. "It just was an inspired moment."

"Spare me Commander."

"If you want to confuse me Garrus, continued John, turning to let Garrus join him, "next time say 'In my cycle we did not have to do calibrations'."

"I'll have to think on that one," mused Garrus. "I have to get that proper tone of arrogance down right, the sort that suggests you're a primitive."

The two walked down the ramp which led to the Normandy.

"You've heard the news I presume," queried Garrus.

"Which news?" asked John. "I was busy checking the packing this morning and dealing with Tali's sudden tears over leaving the apartment."

"Yeah, Liara said Tali was very sad at the New Year's party for a moment when she recognized that you would be leaving it in a couple of days."

"Fun party though. She was in a good mood when we went to bed," recalled John.

"She was drunk," recollected Garrus. "That always puts her in a good mood. Not to mention flirty. What was it she was saying she was going to do to you after midnight?"

"You didn't hear?" asked John struggling to keep the blood from rising to his face.

"Commander, I'm surprised the entire ward didn't hear it. It was a rather projected promise, made while standing on top of the dining room table. I can tell you Liara looked at me and said, "Now that's an idea for when we get back to our room. Which reminds, me, thanks for letting us stay the night. Liara and I both had way too much for a safe drive home and it's a rotten time to try to get a taxi at that time of the morning.

"Actually, just about everyone stayed the night," recalled John. "Grunt and Wrex were asleep in the guest shower. Javik was meditating outside the guest shower. Joker crashed on the lounge couch with EDI sitting beside him. Kaiden and Cortez were in the living room couches, James . . . Where was James?"

"He left before midnight to visit Myra Brooks at the prison, remember? He has been visiting her routinely. He said she would like to have someone to cheer in the New Year with and we all had each other."

"She is a pretty woman," sighed John. "But trouble. I hope she's being sincere with him."

"She might not start out sincere," answered Garrus. "But if he's the only guy visiting when you're behind bars, over time you begin to look forward to his visits and start wishing you were free to spend more time with him. If she doesn't like him now, give it a few years, she'll like him then."

"Well you were a cop in C-sec. I bet you know what you're talking about."

"Believe me I do," answered Garrus. "A good stable man visiting a young dysfunctional girl in prison straightens out the dysfunction in the girl really nicely. I wouldn't say it's the perfect fit for a guy, the visits have to last for more than a year or two. Six months in the pokey is not enough time to make a girl straighten up for the guy who's seeing her. Six years on the other hand . . ."

They walked into the Normandy. Joker was at his seat, EDI was siting at his right. They were going through the checks on the equipment.

"Need anything for me to sign off on?" asked John.

"Only if it will make you feel like you matter," suggested EDI.

John sighed. "You heard that comment by Tali didn't you EDI."

"I hear all comm communications, Commander. I am learning to be discrete about it though, such as not telling about the time Liara described in graphic detail a favorite position of Asari lovers when employing biotics to Garrus along with suggestions as to which corners of the Normandy such a position could be employed."

"I do appreciate your discretion," deadpanned Garrus.

John was looking at Garrus's face intently.

"I do believe you were not pulling my leg when you said Turians don't blush," sighed John.

"Commander," asked Joker turning to face him. "If you could tell Tali that there will be all sorts of things needing fixing now that the Engineers are done messing with our stuff. EDI's making a list of violations."

"I'll let her know," answered John. "Though you probably will catch her sooner as she's probably down in engineering already going over stuff with Ken, Adams, and Gabby."

"Oh did you hear Kenneth proposed to Gabby over Christmas?" continued Joker.

"No? Well I'll have to send them congratulations," replied John.

"And I'll have EDI send the list to Engineering pronto," finished Joker.

"Oh that's right Commander," added Garrus. "I was going to pass on the news to you that I got this morning."

"Yes, what was it?" asked John.

"Omega has been siezed by Cerberus. Aria T'Locke is looking for help getting it back. The Quarians likewise would like to see Aria back in charge on Omega, as Cerberus is already starting to raid the ships which are going through the Omega Relay and with Aria in charge, and all that scrap coming in from beyond the Relay, Omega was making not a little profit on trade with the Quarians."

"Better send a message to Aria then, see if she can reach the Normandy in the next two hours and we can plan. There are mercenary groups who's help against the Reapers would be nice to secure."

"I'll be in the batteries," reported Garrus who turned to leave.

"Good idea," suggested Joker. "Though seeing the look on Aria's face when she's introduced to Archangel is a great opportunity for pictures.

"I'll be sure to bring something to . . . shoot . . . with," promised Garrus with a grin.

"EDI? Communicate with Aria and arrange docking for her or stay here until she boards. I'll be up in my cabin unpacking for a moment. Call if there's trouble."

John turned and walked to the elevators and rode up to his cabin. He walked in and looked it over. His hamster cage was back in place with Boo, his space hamster sitting in the corner washing his face. The fish had been put into the aquarium per his instructions with the pet stores. Then he opened up his duffle bag and began to arrange a few things. He put Tali's hand tools and hair brush on her desk and hung up her clothing in the closet. He put his ship model kits in his top desk drawer for later construction. Then he put his clothing in the chest of drawers save for his formal Navy Blues which he hung up by Tali's clothing. Then he took out the picture. He paused and looked at it for a moment. That little smile, the off the shoulder suit arrangement, the sun behind her head, the faint white of her eyes, it was all so much a part of her. He found himself once again experiencing that curious ache in his arms which made him want to hold her. He put the picture on his desk, to the right of his computer terminal. He sighed.

"Screw it," he snapped to himself. He walked out of the cabin, and took the elevator down to engineering.

"I really wish those lads had kept their dirty fingers off o' the cables," muttered Kenneth. "We'll have to reroute all that energy or it's all gonna burn ta kingdom come the first time she has to take a shot.

"We can always run some more cables through there," suggested Gabby. "Give the power more room to move and disperse the heat . . ."

"It'll be a tighter fit than you were the first time lassie . . ."

"KEN!"

"You two yust don't changh do you?" suggested Tali struggling to suppress her giggles. "Reroute the power is our best option, but I can do that by moving a couple of pins on the circuit boards and send the power flow through other cable systems already in place." She looked at them. "What do you think about that option?"

The two of them saluted.

"Why the formality all of a sud. . ." was all Tali said before she felt a pair of strong arms wrap around her shoulders and pull her back. Her first impulse was to elbow the sudden violator of her personal space with a good jab but she suddenly realized that the salutes were not for her, but for Commander Shepherd, her Yahn, who had walked up behind her and as so often was the case, she had not heard his footfalls.

"Yahn!" she protested. "We're at work now."

"I know," he said letting go. "I just had to do that. I'm okay now so . . . I should go." And he saluted back and turned and walked back to the elevator.

"Now what brought that on," mused Tali. She turned back to Ken and Gabby. "Okay you two you can stop grinning."

John returned to the command station and began to examine the galaxy map when Samantha came up to him.

"Commander?" she said. "I just received a message from Aria T'Locke. She wishes to inform you that the Normandy will rendezvous with her vessel at the Widow Relay. She has no desire to set foot on your ship for reasons she will elaborate upon when you meet her. Her words, not mine," finished Samantha handing the full message to John who reread it for any fine details just in case.

John had his suspicions. The fact that Aria was going to meet him in space suggested issues. He gave the appropriate commands and the Normandy left the docks and sailed over the wards and was out in space shortly thereafter. Three hours later they were at the Widow Relay and Joker was hailed by a freighter. John got into the shuttle with Steven and flew over to the freighter and sailed into their docking bay. Aria was waiting for him with two Batarian bodyguards. John found the expressions on the bodyguards interesting. There was an acknowledgement that he had destroyed one of their colonies and totally wiped out their population, and likewise there was the recognition that he had been trying to buy the entire galaxy more time to prepare for the Reapers. Their expressions were that interesting mixture of 'I hate you only you can save us' upon their features which John had seen prior on more than a few faces. Aria got into the shuttle with her bodyguards and gave him a gesture which suggested he was to join her.

"Dramatic," observed John. Steve simply piloted the shuttle out into space and began a lazy cruise around the two ships. "I assume this is about retaking Omega."

"This is about your war Shepherd," she replied. "Cerberus controlling the Terminus systems seriously bolsters their mobility. Since they've seized Omega, they have been pushing out throughout the entire galaxy. I'm sure the Alliance has noticed."

"Cut to the chase," replied Shepherd. He really didn't need to listen to Aria's justifications for why he should help. He already knew that Cerberus' behavior was so in the Reaper's advantage that he was fully expecting to discover that Cerberus was allied with the Reapers shortly. "What's your plan?"

"Kick them out," she replied. "I've amassed a fleet of merc ships, we're going to punch through their lines and invade. Once we're on Omega, it's a ground war. That's why I want you. I only accept the best." She paused and put a new figure upon her Omni-pad. It was the picture of a dark haired man named Oleg Petrovsky. "This is the general of the forces in occupied Omega. He's the one who . . . ousted me." It was clear she did not like admitting that she had been driven out of Omega by him.

"Don't know him," admitted Shepherd.

"He's the Illusive Man's top military strategist and best kept secret. But all you really need to know is that he's a merciless bastard."

"What's your intel on the occupation?" continued Shepherd.

"Petrovsky has got a massive force and he's got Omega locked down tight. My intel stops there."

"So, you're winging it," mused Shepherd.

"Not entirely," she replied. "There are secrets on Omega only I know. Secrets which will provide us a foothold. I can tell you this. Petrovsky's invasion was precise and ruthless. He'll stop at nothing to win."

"Sounds familiar," replied Shepherd looking directly at Aria.

"Shepherd," she said. "I know my reputation. I know I'm hated. I know I ruled Omega with an iron fist. But the people were free. Their lives were theirs. I preserved that. This man . . ." and here she waved the picture of Oleg "took all that away and he is going to pay for that!" She leaned back. "When Omega is mine I'll give you everything. I have ships, mercs, eezo, all that will be yours for the war."

"What's the catch?" asked Shepherd.

"I have some objections to some of the company you keep," she replied. "So you'll have to leave the Normandy and it's crew behind."

"A crew of professionals," observed Shepherd.

"Let's just say I want you all to myself," she replied.

"Have to consider the options," replied Shepherd. "I'll have a reply in 24 hours. Until then the Normandy will remain within visual contact of your ship."

Aria nodded and one of the Batarian body guards told Steven to return to the freighter. She and the body guards exited and shortly thereafter, the shuttle was back in the Normandy docks.

Samantha Traynor was waiting for him when he got there.

"What's the news?" she asked.

"We have issues," replied Shepherd. "Aria wants help, but on her own terms, and what's more, she's up against a general who knows how to fight. I am going to need intel on Oleg Petrovsky, let Liara know. I'm going to need to know the status of Normandy's engineering refit, let Tali know. And I'm going to need Garrus in the lounge shortly to discuss the matter." He turned to Samantha. "Do I need to tell you to let Garrus know?"

"If you did," she replied. "You would be needing someone else to serve as your liaison.

"Very true," he replied.

Two hours later, Liara, Garrus, and Tali were in the lounge seated around the couch while Samantha was seated on the side taking minutes.

"Petrovsky has been training Cerberus troops to operate as a true military force, and have occupied Omega with what intel suggests is a fully equipped Regiment. In addition, he commands and additional two regiments who are spread out in the Terminus systems usually at Platoon strength, but there are two separate Battalion concentrations, both within a two week cruise of Omega," summarized Liara.

"So we're talking about a full three thousand troops which he could concentrate at Omega if need be," mused Garrus. "And we're being given mercenaries."

"What can you expect," sighed John. "Aria is not a general. She's not handled a military affair before, her knowledge of combat centers around palace intrigue. Which is what put her into power to begin with."

"So what are the mercenaries we're talking about," asked Garrus. "Or are we talking about . . . the usual suspects."

"Blue Suns, Eclipse, Blood Pack," replied John. "At best, three thousand."

"Mercenaries, so if Cerberus is trained somewhat, we're fighting at a two to one disadvantage unless Cerberus has really trained in which case, it's going to be a slaughter," sighed Garrus.

John nodded. Then Liara brought up a three dimensional blue print of Omega.

"While Omega was originally a mining colony," she explained. "It has since evolved into a full fledged city with it's own internal economy. As you can see from the multiple buildings, any military force can turn the entire asteroid into a solid fortress which would require a full fledged navel bombardment to destroy."

"Something which Aria is not planning on doing," added John. "Which General Petrovsky will take full advantage of."

"This means that any attempts to establish a beachhead will put the advantage on the defender with little effort," continued Liara. "Here are the schematics of the defense cannons" And as the three dimensional holograph of the station slowly rotated, the guns were marked out. "Defense is centered around an equatorial ring which enables the station to defend itself from an attack coming in any direction, but likewise, there are areas where the defense will not be as good. Any attack from the top can count on some of the asteroid's obstructions to block some fields of fire, but the best venue of attack is on the same equatorial plane as the cannon. By doing this we always avoid direct fire from half of Omega's defenses. The down side is as the station orbits around it's central axis, new guns are always coming into play while destroyed guns rotate away which means that the speed of the approach will directly impact the number of guns we will have to deal with."

"It remains the best avenue of approach," concluded Garrus.

"Of course it also gives the Enyineers time to repair the damaged guns out of the fleet's bombardment range," added Tali.

"An invasion force will then be following a clockwise approach so that new guns do not get the opportunity to fire on the approaching shuttles," mused Shepherd.

"And Aria says it's just you," observed Garrus.

"Yahn is not going in alone."

"I think that's the Commander's decision, Ducky," suggested Garrus.

"Alpha Relay," retorted Tali.

"Tali's got a point," added Shepherd. "Simply put, Aria is not going to get me by myself, I don't waste valuable resources, least of all when she's failed to set up a proper invasion given the tactical advantages which Petrovsky has set up and plans to exploit."

"Aria's not used to not getting her way," observed Liara. "She might go it alone if you don't participate."

"And she gets shot out of the sky," replies Garrus. "We didn't have any advantage with Omega before Cerberus took Omega, we still don't have any advantage with Omega. We have not yet lost anything. If we attack Omega, we only do so if we gain an advantage. Aria is offering us an advantage, but she's also bargaining with resources she no longer controls and has yet to regain control of."

John nodded. "Without some direct intervention on our part, she's not going to make it past a beachhead. And if I were Petrovsky, I'd let her land and then pull an Archangel on her. He can be almost certain that the mercenaries will attack down the throat once sufficiently gotten under the skin of."

"And all he has to do is place snipers around the beachhead and a few well placed hits and the mercenaries are screaming down hall and across the bridge and into the fields of fire," finished Garrus.

"There is the matter of raids on the fleet cargo ships bringing in scrap from the accretion disk," observed Tali.

"What will Admiral Gerrel do once Cerberus becomes a sufficient pain in the posterior?" asked Liara.

"The Heavy Fleet will sail in and blow Omega out of the Asteroid Field," replied Tali. "Why waste soldiers trying to take something we don't need. Everyone will buy good scrap, it doesn't have to be Omega. And once Omega is destroyed, then anyone can occupy the asteroid field, even Quarians."

"Which means that if Aria does not gain Omega back in a specified period of time, then Cerberus provokes the Migrant . . . Quarian Fleet into a full fledged bombardment," concluded John. "And then the Quarians take the asteroid and that's the end of Omega." "So we can pretty much tell Aria to do it our way or she loses everything within?" asked Garrus.

"One year at most," concluded Liara. "If Tali's opinion on the Quarian Fleet proves adequate. Cerberus raids on the shipping lanes are causing the loss of one ship every fifty-two. It's not decisive in losses, but it is annoying."

"It's more annoying that yust annoying," replied Tali. "For we have no means for replacing lost ships in Rannoch's ship yards. We have no ship yards. We're still trying to figure out where to put our first one."

"I suspect any lost ship is an annoyance to the Admiralty," offered Garrus. "Knowing Quarian thrift."

John looked at the three dimensional holographic blueprint of Omega.

"I think we know what has to be done in order to take Omega," he concluded. "Samantha? Sum up our conversation into a report for Aria, give it to Liara for final proof. Liara? Once you've got your endorsement on it, send it straight to Aria and then let's let her stew for a few hours before we contact her."

"Think she'll crack?" asked Garrus.

"I think she will given time," replied John. "We have to be willing to wait. Tali? Can you start sending out feelers to Admiral Gerrel about the possibility of a few ships of the Heavy Fleet to provide gun support when we do invade? If we can get sufficient ships attacking on all degrees of the station we can keep Petrovsky guessing until the last moment where the landing will be."

"I will approach him," she answered. "It is Gerrel after all. The opportunity to attack something will be hard for him to resist."

"Liara? Zaeed I suspect, would love to regain control of the Blue Suns, send a few feelers to him reminding him that I had to punch him in the face over Vito his old partner new rival who shot him in the face. Suggest I'm ready to make it up to him by giving him Vito's head."

"Why Zaeed?" asked Garrus.

"He will be more than willing to drill the mercenaries," replied John. "That will give us the necessary edge we'll need, coupled with Aria's back hand knowledge of the station."

Garrus nodded with understanding.

Samantha summed up the meeting's minutes in a half an hour and then Liara sent it to Aria two hours later.

Twenty hours later, John contacted Aria via com.

"I'm offering the full services of the Normandy and her crew, with me as full commander of the invasion force. Take it or do it yourself," replied Shepherd. "And do so with the understanding that I firmly expect you to be slaughtered without the Normandy."

"Well aren't you the big fat ugly asshole fuck-head," suggested Aria with her frowny face on.

"After such flattery, I take it that's a yes?" replied John smiling gently and diplomatically.

Aria just looked at him. John simply looked back at her and remained smiling. Slowly comprehension dawned on Aria's face. Little by little she began to realize that Commander Shepherd was only going to help her on his terms, and he would let her founder otherwise. And furthermore, he fully expected her to founder.

Then she stared at him a bit more. John could tell she was thinking.

"I wanted you because I only want the best. You're telling me that you can't do it without your team? I thought you were the best. Should I look somewhere else?"

"You can," replied John. He knew she had just tried to appeal to his vanity. It had failed. "Let me know if you find someone. If not, you know where to find me." He made a move as if to end the transmission.

"Wait," she said, calmly and quietly. John couldn't help but be impressed at her control. "You are the best, and if the best says it can't be done without his team. I suppose I had better believe the best."

John nodded. "We'll have a conference on your ship when your fleet is ready to sail."

"Very well," she said. "Just don't bring Archangel."

"I can leave him behind for the conference," replied John. "But he'll be fighting alongside of me during the battle and training your troops to do the same. You're just going to have to learn to see his good side."

"I _have_ seen his good side," snapped Aria. "And that's what I hate about him."

The transmission ended.

Over the next 8 hours, the Normandy watched as more and more ships arrived through the Widow relay and began to gather around Aria's 'Command' Freighter.

At 1800 hours, John called it a night and sent an Omni-tool message to Tali informing her that she was to report to his cabin pronto. She sent a reply back asking him why. John sighed and sent her another reply reminding her that he was Captain of the vessel she was serving under. She replied that his tone suggested he was sending her a bond-mate request and if he thought for one moment that he could order her 'into his bed' then he had better re-evaluate their relationship. He sent a new message that it was their bed not his. Once again she asked him if this was an order for a Captain/Engineer conference or was this merely a desire to cuddle with his wife?

"I am having a fight with my wife on an omni-tool," he thought.

He sent a new message which read as follows.

"Your captain orders you to cease and desist all engineering tasks until 0600 tomorrow so that you might get sufficient rest to be at full engineering capacity. And your bond-mate requests that he spend the night with you as he misses his Monkey Duck something awful and reminds you that only by spending time in the cabin will you be able to re-acclimate with the Normandy."

Exactly three seconds later the door opened and Tali walked in. She paused and looked at her Omni-tool, responded to a message and then walked over to the bed and sat down upon it. John's Omni-tool beeped and he noted he had a new message. It was from Tali and it said, "I'll think about it."

He just looked at her. He could see her eyes glowing behind the visor but he didn't now if she was smiling or not.

"You were on your way the entire time weren't you?" he observed with a slight smile.

"Of course," she replied with a cheerful chirp. "It's been a busy day and exhausting, I really was glad you reminded me it was off time."

She flopped down on the bed and checked her omni-tool.

"I have fifteen minutes out of my mask tonight," she said. "First night is always 'take it slow'."

John sighed. "I am in a dilemma," he said. "I want to kiss that sweet face of yours now, but that means you won't kiss me awake tomorrow morning if I do. What decision shall I make?"

Tali tilted her head to the side. "You always like being kissed awake," she observed. "I would advise my captain to wait."

"Then I shall follow your advice," he said. He got into his sweats and lay down upon the bed next to her. Above them the stars slowly slid by the view port.

"Well," she said snuggling up to him. "We're back on the Normandy aren't we?"

"Kind of like being home again isn't it?" he observed.

"You're yust noticing for the first time?" she teased. "I've felt that way about the Normandy since . . . well . . . since before I first cuddled up to you in your bunk."

"The first Normandy? But Tali, you spent over a year back on the Migrant Fleet afterwards, how did you never feel like you were home again there?"

Tali paused for a few moments. "I don't know," she said. "It was yust . . . after I fell in love with you, I couldn't think of any place I wanted to be other than with you and you were always with the Normandy."

"Even after I had died?"

Tali was quiet again for a moment.

"Auntie Raan kept introducing me to such nice Quarian guys who were skilled and polite and clever. Roigor was so funny, he would have me in stitches on a regular basis. Always had a humorous take on what ever was happening. He made a really good yoke yust before we landed on Haestrom and everyone was laughing. It helped make the first few moments of that mission tolerable." She paused. "He was also one of the first we lost."

"No one at all?"

"Every time Kal would politely give me advice, every time Roigor would crack a yoke, every time Dior would tell me how much my engineering solutions were helping the Neema, I would remember something similar on the Normandy. Kal would say "Yes Ma'am," and I'd remember Ashley shouting "Sir, yes sir!" when we were in drill. Every time Roigor would crack a yoke, I'd think of Yoker suggesting we call up the council so we could hang up on them again. And every time Dior would tell me about how I had fixed something, I'd remember Adams saying the same thing. And then . . . And then I'd think about how I took off my mask and kissed you the first time and how you struggled for a moment with the temptation to open your eyes, but you kept them closed. And I realized that you would never leave me. And then I'd want to cry. And it never was the right place to cry, not in front of Kal or Dior or Roigor. So I would think of waking up next to you on the Normandy in that cabin you had before we got to Ilos and that would be a happy memory and I'd be okay, but . . . It was always like I was thinking of home."

"What happened to Dior?"

"He died during the battle for Rannoch. He was with Admiral Koris."

"I'm sorry Tali," sighed John. "If they were anything like Kal, they sounded like good friends."

"They were. But they weren't you."

"You know Tali? I think under the right circumstances, you would have eventually fallen in love with one of them. I honestly think that you were not allowed to forget about me because I was going to need you so much for this."

"I never would have Yahn. They simply were not you. They never would have measured up."

John smiled. Tali's psychology simply would not allow her to think of that possibility any more. Yet he had no doubt that if he had stayed in heaven, she would have been bonded to one of them by now. He remained silent and within a few seconds, she started heelrou. Three memories were now associated with that gentle trill. Here in this bed on the Normandy, the apartment on Silversun, and his grandparent's house in Maine. He had been just a kid in Maine, and there was not even a hint of Tali then. Yet those flashing lights across the wall and ceiling reminded him of the Silversun apartment where he would hear Tali heelrou. And now he was watching stars slowly cross the view port above the bed and beside him again, the heelrou. How many evenings did he just lay here, on his back, with her next to him gently trilling. It seemed like an awful lot yet he knew he had spent way more of them alone. And in spite of that, the thought of him going back to those nights alone held no joy for him. Once more he gave her a firm squeeze and she made a little omph noise and whispered "I love you Yahn," before she once again relaxed and resumed heelrou. Tomorrow, he would be in conference with a partner he had never envisioned having to team up with. Tomorrow, they would begin to plan a campaign against a military force which was in every way superior to theirs in terms of equipment, terrain, and motivation. John had no illusions about why he was going to have to fight this campaign. This was a dress rehearsal for a bigger campaign. And what's more, he was going to have to win this one. He was still meditating on the challenge laid before him when he fell asleep.

"Based on the latest intel," began Aria's Naval commander, Jarl, "we're out-shipped four to one. Most of our ships are transports with limited firepower."

John, Tali, and Liara were back on the command freighter talking to Aria and her assistants. Samantha was busy being stenographer again behind them. She wasn't that necessary for this particular meeting but Liara wanted good records of everything that was happening because of her own special projects, of which she had given little intel about other than suggesting she was planning on writing history books about this war after it was over with. John found that not at all surprising. Liara was very much the academic and had gotten more so since she had developed a talent for information brokerage.

"We're not here to win a space battle Jarl, we only have to punch through their line," began Aria.

"Yes we are," interrupted Shepherd.

Aria turned to Shepherd.

"If we punch through their lines, we get on Omega, we drive them out, end of story," she stated.

John shook his head.

"You can punch through their lines easy, and you can land, and if Petrovsky is the general you think he is, he'll let you do just that. Then he'll turn every single port hole and window into a sniper spot and every single corridor, street, and passage into a funnel for killing. You'll be in street to street action for weeks and then you run out of food and ammo and you die."

"Not if we keep shipping in new recruits and supplies," replied Jarl.

"And how are you going to do that if he has a fleet surrounding Omega?"

Aria looked at him.

"You're going to have to win a space battle on a routine basis," replied John.

"He sailed right into Omega and took it in 24 hours," retorted Aria. "We can do the same thing. We simply take out the command ship with our commandeered Cerberus cruiser and then land before his fleet can respond."

"If Petrovsky were you and not expecting an invasion," interrupted John. "You did not see him coming. But I can guarantee you that he knew every single landing point on the base before his ships ever came through the relay. Each ship knew exactly where they were going to land their troops before you ever saw them coming. And once they landed, each unit knew exactly what points they had to secure and they had computer point navigation taking them down every single public street and byway. Human armies have done this a thousand thousand times. It's called taking them by surprise. You were lucky you got out of there alive. He knows you. He studied you closely first. He knows you're planning on coming back. He'll be waiting for you. It won't matter how well you know Omega, it's secret passageways and such, he'll know how to make you fight for every single inch of that base. And it's going to take weeks, if not months. If you land, and your ships are then destroyed? You're toast. You'll starve before he loses all his men."

"His command ship will be dead in the water," argued Aria.

"For twenty-four hours at most, then the second in command figures out he's in charge and commands from his vessel, assuming he was drunk when the flagship was destroyed. Then he coordinates the Cerberus fleet and shoots your fleet down and there you are, in a perimeter holding a block or two of Omega, and he just waits for you to starve."

Aria's face remained annoyed in expression.

"Liara? Give us a best plan of operation . . ."

Liara smiled one of her 'I'm in charge so don't mess with me' smiles and proceeded.

"General Petrovsky is first and foremost a ground general which means he won't use his navy to it's full capacity. Given our slim resources this is not a decisive disadvantage for him. Thus our best response will be to use Aria's initial plan for infiltration, a Trojan Horse operation as Commander Shepherd referred to it, for the initial beach head. From that point on, the chief strategy of our naval forces will be to draw off his navy into pursuits when we need to bring supplies and men onto our base of operations on Omega. Admiral Gerrel of the Quarians, will be lending a squadron of Heavy Cruisers to enable us to maintain sufficient threat so that General Petrovsky will have to keep maneuvering his fleet to meet our military threat."

"Five Quarian cruisers won't do much," observed Jarl.

"Save force him to meet us head on with everything he's got if he does not want to keep losing ships. When your fleet is threatening his, the Normandy can sail into Omega's beach head under stealth and deliver the men and materials we need to maintain the offensive. Daily supply runs are what will be needed. If we can continue to deliver men and materials to our beach head on a daily basis, we can maintain the pressure against him and slowly take back the base."

"There is no planet within a day's cruise to Omega to make that possible," argued Aria.

"No, but there's a Relay," replied John. Put your supply ships at the other end of the relay and have them make the supply runs while one ship remains behind for the Normandy to dock with and then make the daily runs. Through the relay, to the base, and back again through the relay. Easy to do so on a daily basis and always under stealth."

"So what keeps Petrovsky from sailing down the relay himself and blowing up our freighters?" asked Jarl.

"The fact that our fleet will still be in being," replied Liara. "The moment his fleet abandons Omega, we can use our fleet to attack multiple points on Omega with impunity and completely cut off his forces from any future communication with his fleet save by him conducting a new beach head operation himself, against the very guns he is counting on to force us away. If Jarl loses the fleet threatening the Cerberus fleet stationed at Omega, we're dead, end of story."

"Jarl," she continued. "Your entire strategy must be one of constant threat of attack, employing the asteroid field to shield your movements, finding isolated Cerberus ships, focusing on them to destroy them, forcing him to keep his fleet consolidated and always probing for a means of bringing your fleet into a decisive action while at the same time making sure you don't get into any action with his fully concentrated fleet at all."

Jarl looked concerned.

"It's not that hard," argued John. There was a time when English ships sailed at will on the seas. The only way the Dutch, French, German, and Spanish ships were able to maintain any naval presence was to keep their fleets from encountering the concentrated British fleet. If they failed to do that, they were toast, case in point Trafalgar."

"Simply put, General Petrovsky will not know we have freighters on the other side of the relay, he won't have any evidence of traffic since the only ship which will be delivering supplies will be the Normandy which is a fully functioning stealth frigate. Our real danger will be when he attempts to bring supplies in himself, in which case we'll have to make our freighters scarce," observed Liara.

Aria paced back and forth.

"I'm not used to waiting," she grumbled.

"Welcome to reality," replied Shepherd. "Tim no doubt was counting on Petrovsky to know his enemy before he attacked, and he apparently did his homework. All you knew about him was that he was 'ruthless' which suggests you were stunned at the speed of his takeover. What that tells me is that he's a very good general who knows just where to put his troops."

"Like a chess player," suggested Samantha. Aria and John both looked at her. "Sorry Commander," she continued and pantomimed zipping her mouth shut.

"It's okay Traynor," replied Shepherd. "It was an apt analogy."

Liara brought up the three dimensional holographic blueprint of Omega. "Our beachhead will be here, along this docking facility. It is not too small, and it's not too large. Hence Petrovsky will presume several supply ships and not just one, which taking a small dock would suggest. And it's not too large which means that he won't defend it with as many troops. In addition, Aria has informed me that there is a bunker there where she conducted covert operations outside of Omega. That will be heavily reinforced and the perfect first command center. Once we land, we will have a brief window of opportunity to seize a total of nine building complexes which gives us space between his troops and our dock, but likewise gives us a single block which will be shielded from orbital bombardment by his navy. There we can establish headquarters, depots, and hospitals. Each Mercenary unit will be given a three block swath to take creating a three by three block which will constitute our initial beach head. Once we have secured that, our next tactic will be to probe which block is the weakest and then take that one while making our own beachhead a fortification which will slaughter his forces if he tries to take it back. Computer Nav points will be put into each of the three mercenary units objectives, and Aria? Make sure that each unit likewise knows all the hidden byways to enable them to accomplish their first objectives. If they don't? We're going to have a much harder time planning without umbrellas."

"Umbrellas?" asked Jarl.

"Protection from bombardment," replied John. "Tends to be distracting when you are trying to patch up wounds and pull bullets out of fleshy parts while figuring out where you will be attacking next."

"During the initial days of the campaign, Petrovsky will have to keep the rest of Omega garrisoned in order to make sure we don't try to establish another beachhead. Once he realizes that this is the front line, he'll concentrate his forces along our lines. Even so, while our front remains shorter than his, we will be able to concentrate better. Once we have secured half the station, the situation reverses and we'll be the one's with the spread out forces in relation to him."

"But we're going to have three thousand to his one thousand," argued Aria.

"Not for long," replied John. "Within two weeks he'll have brought in his other forces and he'll be up to three thousand, less casualties. And we're mercenaries, he's got trained troops. Once we're at parity, there will be stalemate until he begins to push back, and then we're going to be sweating bullets."

"And how do you propose to fix that?" asked Aria.

"N7 drill," replied Shepherd smiling. "Once the Mercenaries are trained as special opts? Well they won't be as good as special opts but they will be good enough to tip the balance back in our favor. Then we can hope to win it."

"And how do you propose to do that?" asked Aria.

"That's where Zaeed comes in, which is why Vito has to go."

"How do you want him dead," asked Aria calmly. "I presume there's a grudge?"

"No grudge on my part, but he shot Zaeed in the face over who was going to command the Blue Suns once upon a time. He doesn't have to be dead, just gone, but if Zaeed thinks he's dead, that will make Zaeed's day."

"And what makes you think Zaeed will train the Blue Suns the N7 way?" she asked.

"He was there on the Suicide Mission. He knows how effective N7 tactics and training are. He'll beat it into the Blue Suns if he has to, and once they see they are living to tell about their fights, they will cooperate. And then the other mercenary groups will be wanting in on the action as well. Not even mercenaries like dying."

"You think?" she asked.

The planning continued, but the main features were now in place. Aria however got increasingly impatient as the maps were studied, the orders were given and the various components began to be put into place. John then insisted that the entire invasion force be moved to another system which was off the beaten path since everything which was going through the Widow relay to and from the Citadel was passing by which meant that sooner or later even Cerberus would catch on and likewise, in the off chance that the Reapers came along to take it as well, they were in no condition to be in the way of that attack force.

It was another week before Aria's forces were ready. In the meantime, Hackett was kept appraised of the operation. He approved for several reasons. For starters, the scrap was an easy resource which could be shipped to the Crucible operation. Easy resources were harder to come by as the weeks had passed. Second, the fact that the system was in the core, made it a good refuge as it was away from any civilization which the Reapers were harvesting. The Geth could build a Dyson Sphere there, using the scrap already in place, get their energy from the Black Hole's own emissions, and thanks to Dr. Solus's inoculation serum against indoctrination, a stasis sanctuary of each species could likewise be set up to last until the end of the Reaper harvest which would be an estimated 500 years and there would not be the need to worry about betrayal. Or at least there would be a greatly reduced chance of it. So the taking of Omega would have some military benefit since it would provide a base of operations for the Dyson spheres.

"And as the pressure from the Reapers increases," finished Hackett, "The need to be rid of Cerberus will increase as well. Officially The Illusive Man's goal is to secure control of the Reapers to advance humanities interests. Unofficially, the first step of that is to remove the Alliance as a player in humanities interests. What little humanity will be left after that is not something The Illusive Man has elaborated upon."

John nodded. "I doubt he's thought that far," he replied.

"He'd have been a good man if he had not been so keen on advancing his own power along with humanities," speculated Hackett.

"Any man who's willing to sacrifice personal power for the betterment of all is a better man," answered John. "The moment someone focuses on the attainment of power, even for a lofty and good goal, remains focused on the attainment of power until the attainment of power is the only goal that they pursue. Because you will never amass sufficient power to do everything you want to do."

"Tell me about it," groaned Hackett. "The Geth have taught us to take out single Reapers with twenty ships as opposed to twenty-five. Imagine how many Reapers we could remove if we only needed eighteen, or sixteen, and so it goes. Oh Commander? While I'm thinking about it, be prepared to move suddenly on Thessia. The Reapers are probing Asari defenses more and more. Likewise Anderson reports things getting quiet in Earth's cities. Fewer raids into the country side and more successful rescues from the cities. Reapers are planning a new assault it looks like."

"What about Palavan?"

"Same reports there," Krogan raids into the cities are being very successful. Moral is very high on Palavan right now. Not that they've taken any city back of course, but it's clear that the Reapers are pulling out troops to prepare a new front."

"And we know where they will be getting their next batch of reinforcements," sighed John. "It's going to be damn tricky to pull from Omega to Thessia in the first few weeks," he continued. "Aria has no clue how to stage a campaign, all she has is the killer instinct. Once I can get Omega's forces in line so they can fight without me, I'll be able to respond to any Thessia issues."

"Never rains but pours," sighed Hackett. "Let's hope the Asari are ready enough to not need you to pull their little blue tushes out of a red molten Reaper beam. At least for a few weeks."

John logged off, checked the time, and told Tali he would shortly be in the cabin. She would be an hour and forty five minutes out of her helmet tonight. Once again, her face was the most precious thing about her in the world.

"I swear that suit has done more to keep this relationship magical than anything else in the galaxy," he chuckled to himself as he rode up the elevator to that pair of white eyes sparkling little blue flashes.


	30. Chapter 30 - I Hate This Place

January was half over. Tali's birthday was coming up. She would be eighteen in Earth years. John found himself thinking about what sort of present he would be able to get her as he went through the relay and found himself approaching Omega in a captured Cerberus cruiser. The fleet was behind them, on the other side of the relay, waiting for the signal to attack. The only exception was the Normandy, it was behind Aria's ship. They were hailed, the voice counterfeit worked, they were let into the middle of the Cerberus fleet, and they got their first strike on the command vessel and put it out. And that was the last thing that went right.

Then the rest of the fleet charged in, and by the time Cerberus had fallen back to regroup, Petrovsky hailed them. Aria took the hail while John made himself scarce. The longer it took for Petrovsky to realize he was present, the longer Petrovsky would remain loose and confidant, secure in the knowledge that Aria might be able to backstab and betray and finagle her way to the top of an underworld empire, but she was totally out of her league in a pitched battle. Aria had not liked that either. She had hoped that John Shepherd's presence might have put Petrovsky off. But John once again held his own and reminded her that when you have the best, you pay attention to what they suggest you do.

"You're beginning to get used to the flattery," she suggested with that classic understated Asari smile.

"As an argument for getting the right thing done," he answered. "Yes. But that's all it's really good for."

The holographic image of Petrovsky flashed into view.

"Aria," he said. "I knew this had to be you. You'll never make it. Call it off now."

"You're barking up the wrong tree," replied Aria.

"You're not used to being defeated," replied Oleg. "It's clouded your judgement. I've noticed you took the time to upgrade that ship with new armor and shields. Pity you wasted those funds. I also took the time to upgrade the cannon surrounding Omega's defenses."

"Then let's see what you've got," she replied.

And so Aria's fleet charged the base with her flagship leading the point of the wedge. If Petrovsky had expected a point blank navel exchange he was disappointed. But he got over it very quickly. Understanding that the Cerberus Navy was still superior, Aria's plan had been to ram the cruiser into the docking areas which had been the designated landing zone. The problem was that the base guns were really good and her ship never made it. The landing was made with escape pods which were scattered up to two hundred and fifty meters from the designated landing area while her cruiser tried to retreat and failed to make it, exploding as it lost control and flew into a larger asteroid. And then they had to fight their way through Cerberus to regroup. By the time John and Aria had their landing team at the right place, they had lost 23 of their original 50.

It was at this point that Cortez and Team Normandy landed in the shuttle at the designated point and right on time. Aria, her team pinned down, at half strength, and unable to make a dent in the rapidly expanding Cerberus presence, suddenly had no objections to Archangel, or any one else for that matter.

Cerberus was good, but Team Normandy was better, and in fifteen minutes the docking area was cleared sufficiently for rest of Aria's mercenaries to start to land. And once that happened, Cerberus was slowly pushed back.

It was a hard fight the whole way. Fortunately as John had predicted, Petrovsky could not yet risk throwing his entire force at the bridgehead and so while Cerberus killed three mercenaries for every single casualty they took, there were only fifty of them holding the landing area and by the time they were reduced to 30, they had fallen back. One prisoner was taken, a fellow named Tom Wiggins and he was more than willing to talk, mostly bragging about the superiority of Cerberus forces. Before he was done, John and Aria were well versed with the weapons, armor, and number of atlas mechs which were on the base. The Batarians were all for enslaving him, John informed them that prisoners would be kept for exchange. Wiggins however, recognized Shepherd.

"Kai Leng has got your number," he boasted. "He'll kill you before this is over with. He's been studying your every move."

"And who is Kai Leng?"

"Only the best assassin in Cerberus. Takes his orders direct from The Illusive Man himself."

"Like me and Miranda?" queried John with a slight smile.

"Don't know how you turned her," retorted Wiggins, "but when we find her, she's dead too."

"I'm real good at turning people," replied John. "So I suggest you be careful. I'll have you rethinking your ties as well."

Wiggens snorted and was taken away to a makeshift POW prison. Now that the perimeter had been secured, John's orders had been precise. Each battalion of mercs had a block to occupy and keep watch from, even the central block since it wasn't that deep a front for a good infiltration specialist. Everyone was to fight from cover and keep in cover. Sure enough, as John had suspected, Cerberus formed a line around the beachhead and was engaged in sniper fire. And that was beginning to bug the mercs, especially Blood Pack as the Vorcha were more than a little restless.

John moved along the lines, enforcing his orders and then retired to the central command post where he found Zaeed in his office. Zaeed was in a tolerable good mood, as he had been since he had been given Vito's head by Aria. He kept it in a glass box which was presently mounted above his desk.

"Shepherd," he said as John walked in. "Not a bad first day, tomorrow we should be able to push another block in."

"We'll see," replied John. "When do you plan on implementing drill?"

"Already started it," answered Zaeed. "I've run the numbers. We lost 71 today and killed 23 of them. Rotten exchange rate since we both know he's got another guddam two thousand he'll be moving in when he can and we're at our full strength with only replacements to hope for, each one untrained and ready to shit bricks the moment they see a big yellow mech."

John nodded.

"Aria can't understand why you and me are annoyed at the casualties. The blue bitch seems to think there are plenty more where that came from. 'Course she's right guddam it, but they don't come in as fast as they can go out if we keep fighting like this."

"It's going to be a real slog fest now," Shepherd reflected.

"Oh there's even more bad news you need to be appraised of," continued Zaeed.

"Well aren't you just full of joy and bubbles today."

"Yeah that's me, farting roses every other Tuesday. The bitch is this, Petrovsky's fleet has moved to within visual of the docks, which means that the Normandy can't land with new supplies or reinforcements, and Petrovsky's fleet is acting like it plans to stick around for a very long time."

"Looks like we're going to be busy getting the guns we just put out back online to drive them back from the docks," sighed Shepherd.

"And how are we gonna guddam do that?" asked Zaeed. "Seeing as they'll be seeing us trying to fix them and start shooting?"

"That's what our navy's for," replied John. "If Gerrel can't do something to keep them busy, no one can, and Petrovsky's weakness is his fleet talents. We have to exploit that as much as possible. We have them focused on our fleet, especially the Quarian Cruisers and then during that fight, we fix our guns, and we take these two edge blocks here and here which brings more guns to our side."

Zaeed looked at the map.

"We can do it, but we're going to take more casualties doing it," he grumbled.

"And if we don't?"

"You die, I die, everyone guddam dies," grumbled Zaeed.

"Guess what we get to do as soon as you have men ready."

"Oh they're ready," replied Zaeed. "Provided we have distractions all along the front."

John nodded. "Get things planned out for 9 hours from now, then get some sleep Zaeed."

"Right, gotta sleep or I get grumpy and am no fun at battles."

John walked out and passed by an open plaza. In it Garrus and Liara were busy demonstrating spot and sniper techniques to the assembled Asari members of Eclipse. Garrus was playing up his Archangel mystique to the hilt while Liara, true to her Shadow Broker talents, remained utterly inconsequential and totally overlooked. John smiled. Liara apparently was having Garrus refer to her as Crest. He walked into the next building. There, sitting on a couch, looking utterly calm and at rest was Aria. There was a Batarian behind her holding a boom box playing dance music and two dancers flanking her wearing bits of armor strategically placed to direct the gaze away from the vitals, meaning heart and brain.

John walked up to her.

"You know this is not how most generals command."

"But this is how I do," she replied. She handed him an omni-pad. As he scanned it he noticed she had been entirely briefed on the full military situation with a list of questions to ask him.

So John brought her up to speed struggling to not be distracted by the dancers.

"So far it's playing out just like you said it would," she sighed. "Glad I listened to you. Blue Suns are not happy about Archangel however. There have been . . . complaints. I pointed out that he's on our side but that does not seem to phase all of them."

"Zaeed will be beating sense into them shortly," replied John.

"Oh I know he's starting to train them," she replied with a smile. "But if any of them think like me, they'll take their newfound tricks and try to use them on Archangel. Do tell him to be careful."

John leaned over and looked Aria in the face.

"And do remind them that there's a bigger enemy out there wanting to kill them, and if they keep holding grudges, they'll be just as dead as they want Archangel."

Aria, unflappable as ever, nodded her head with a sly grin.

John walked into what he had designated as his 'headquarters'. Tali was there working on cleaning the place. A very exhausted drone staggered out of the room, something which John found highly evocative. Tali's posture likewise suggested exhaustion.

"When did anyone ever clean this station?" she asked.

"I have no idea," sighed John looking for a place to sit. He spotted a chair and headed to it.

"Not that one it's not yet been cleaned. You'll spread dust."

"Okay Tali, I'm really tired. Which chairs have you cleaned?"

"Nearly one."

"Nearly one?"

"I thought about it and planned to, but . . . well I worked mostly on the bed. It's clean, and the floor. But don't touch anything else."

"How long have you been cleaning? I've never seen a drone look exhausted in my entire life."

"It seems like hours Yahn. Ever since I got to this room after finding out it was ours for the duration."

"Oh Tali . . ."

"I'm sorry Yahn, but you can't have a commander working in a dirty environment."

"I'm sorry Tali, really, I'm not mad at you . . . I'm just so . . . this is going to be so hard."

"Come to bed Yahn, I'll hold you."

"I'd like that a lot," sighed John. He walked over to the bed, which had been moved away from the walls, no doubt because she would be cleaning those too."

"Tali? Tomorrow we're going to be getting the rim guns online. I'm going to need you there."

"I understand," she sighed. She snuggled up to him and then with her right hand, directed his chin to face her. "I need to look at you tonight," she whispered. "It's going to be a front line battle isn't it? Like you wrote about on Palavan?"

John nodded.

"Our shields won't stop a ship's cannon will they?" she mused

John nodded. She sighed.

"No matter what happens," she said. "Remember, I've loved you since Peak 15."

"I won't forget Tali, how can I? Without you I'm lost," he replied smiling.

They held each other until they fell asleep, listening to small arms fire in the background. John noted that Tali did not heelrou but he was too exhausted to let it keep him awake much longer.

The next day's battle was well planned out and looked unbeatable on paper. On the left, the center battalion of the Blue Suns would push forward, but once they were in the complex of the next block, they would pivot ninety degrees to the left and drive into the docks on the left flank of Cerberus who would be busy defending against the left flank of the Blue Suns Battalion.

"Yeah, you're going to have them spinning around like a guddam top," joked Zaeed.

On the right side of the front, Eclipse would push straight for the right anchor of the Cerberus front while the Blood Pack would push all along the rest of the front. Their job was to simply keep Cerberus defending all along the line. Admiral Gerrel however, was to engage the Cerberus fleet and keep them busy trying to get shots in from between the Asteroids. Team Normandy's first job was to get to the docks and get those guns online while the fleets were busy. Zaeed was with the Blue Suns while Aria was leading Eclipse with the understanding that each of them would assist the other once their objectives were completed.

Unfortunately, Petrovsky was making his own plans as well. And one of them included a very mobile set of reserve fire teams who he moved with graceful precision from one hot spot to the other. The Blood Pack had been instructed to try to take one of the three blocks in front of them, they interpreted that as a challenge and had tried to take all three. The Vorcha were enthusiastic as expected, and got foot holds in each of the three blocks, but by the end of two hours of fighting, were back to their starting positions having lost another 37 men. Cerberus then attacked their center block and they found themselves nearly driven out before Team Normandy left the docks and reinforced them and so pushed Cerberus back. That delayed getting the guns online by another two hours. Fortunately, Gerrel knew what he was doing having learned how to deal with keeping a fleet in being under pressure the hard way just a few months prior, and with three Geth on each of his ships, there was plenty of coordinated fire which Cerberus was not prepared to handle. Every one of his ships took damage and suffered casualties, but Cerberus entirely lost a ship and likewise the fleet was tied down a full six hours.

On the right, Aria took her block thanks to her knowledge of the underground byways which enabled Eclipse to flank each and every single Cerberus position. Even so, Cerberus lost 23 men, and Eclipse lost 51. Zaeed however, pulled his maneuver off without a hitch, but again at a high rate of losses. Aria showed up just in time for them to remove the last fortified position of Cerberus.

And then the guns opened up and Petrovsky was forced to pull his fleet back. But that pretty much tipped their hand. Petrovsky was now almost certain this was the point of attack and began moving his troops accordingly. And for the next five days, Aria's forces were on full defense and Petrovsky kept probing each point of the line. And so at the end of the week, John found himself holding the same eleven blocks he had started with on day three. No push by Cerberus was successful because Aria knew how to outflank each and every single thrust by Cerberus, thanks to her backhand knowledge of the base. But likewise, Petrovsky was now able to move his forces along the entire line to meet each new threat. Total losses were 398 with Cerberus down 193. The mercenaries were way better on defense.

But then Aria called John into a new conference. As he walked in, he spied Petrovsky's holo-image waiting for him.

"Good day Commander Shepherd," he said with a grin.

"General Petrovsky," replied John, determined to looks as unflappable as possible.

"Fascinating turn of events," observed Petrovsky. "We secured a Blue Suns deserter two days ago. He told my interrogators something so interesting that they brought him to me yesterday. Seems that an old enemy of his, who had killed his kid brother, was named Archangel, and when he saw Archangel, he got so disgusted with the Blue Suns that he decided to switch sides."

John remained passive.

"'Love treason, hate traitors,' something Julius Caesar observed if I recall correctly," continued Petrovsky. "Anyway, there's only one person who Archangel works with, and that's Commander Shepherd. And if Commander Shepherd is about, can the Normandy be far away? And that of course explains how the Quarians suddenly begin to cooperate with Aria's fleet. Pity your fleet can't blockade me in, I'd be ready to negotiate for surrender terms. But of course you're good enough a general to know that already."

John nodded.

"Needless to say Aria was smart enough to not deny my suggestion that she get Commander Shepherd when I rang up. No point in lying when you're fingers are glued to the cookie jar. But you're not getting anywhere, and my reinforcements are starting to arrive. So I'm going to offer you a 48 hour grace period to withdraw. Honors of Combat I believe the ancient term is. We won't molest you if you try to leave. Think of all the civilian lives and property you'll be saving."

"Very generous offer," replied John. For it was. "But I don't think this battle is over with just yet. Who knows, in four weeks we might be extending that offer to you."

Petrovsky smiled.

"I highly doubt it," he said. "But I can see I'm going to have to work a little harder to win this now that I know you are here. Pity you left Cerberus, but it seems we all have a little self-destructive bug in our systems. Perhaps you fear success. Know that this channel will always be open for you to surrender. Petrovsky out."

Aria folded her hands and frowned.

"He's sounding too damn sure of himself," she replied.

"That is war," replied John. "But he's got something up his sleeve it seems."

"So what do we do?" she asked.

"Even the odds," he replied. "You have contacts with the civilians right?"

"Piles who owe me," she answered. "It was always good policy to help out the ordinary people when I could get their names written down, favors were always a good commodity to have."

"Let's find out where he's keeping his mechs," suggested John. "He's not put them into the battle yet, probably because he wants to save them for a maximum punch, and he doesn't know our fighting capabilities just enough yet to do that. Before he figures it out however, I'd like to have them either working for us or not working at all."

Aria smiled. "I can do that, no problem. Just hold the line for 48 hours."

That evening, John was seated upon his own couch and Tali was seated nest to him holding his arm with her two hands.

"Tomorrow's your birthday," he observed. "You'll be 18. What do you want my teenaged wife?"

"A clean room," she sighed.

"You mean it's not clean yet?" asked John. Since he had gotten into this room, most of the fuzz had been removed from the chairs and bed. The walls, ceiling, and floors looked at least two shades lighter, and he could see his reflection in the desktop sheen. And she still said it was dirty.

She looked at him, pulling his chin in line with her visor.

"I want to kiss you," she started to cry. "And . . . It's too dirty to risk it . . . This entire base is on the same interconnected air filtration system and I don't think anyone has ever tried to sterilize it."

She just leaned into him and meeped softly while her visor began to whift off the tears. Part of John was inclined to just point out to her that she didn't have this problem the last time they had been in Omega but then he remembered they were staying on the Normandy and acclimating to it. The Normandy was running supplies under stealth, and so they were living on Omega.

"I hate this place," she whimpered. "I hear gun fire all the time, there are people being brought in all bloody with arms and legs blown off. It's not like our other missions, where we just went in and out and it was all over with in a few hours. Then to bed in our own bed and I could kiss you and hold on to someone good who loved me. That helped me so much. You could . . . You could walk by an open window and a shot would ring out and you would be dead . . . And I . . ." And she began to cry again.

John just held her. And she just held on tightly. The pressure was intense, for there really was as of yet no way to escape the front line. And snipers were beginning to make their presence felt. Garrus now had ten separate sniper teams, mostly from Eclipse, for Asari were adept at being patient enough waiting for the right second to fire, but there were two Blue Sun Turian teams who were determined to be just as good as Archangel. But Petrovsky was doing the same thing. And there was one team which was becoming notorious whom the mercs were calling Crack-fire from the sound his sniper's widow would make.

Suffice to say, Tali's eighteenth birthday was not one she cared to recall later. John did manage to pull a sweet surprise on her. He found a box of dextro chocolate in an abandoned apartment. It was half eaten, but his omni-tool scan suggested six of the pieces were still fresh enough to pass Quarian inspection. He found a sterile box just big enough to hold all six pieces and red ribbon to tie it up with. He wrapped up each piece carefully in a wax paper pocket so the entire thing looked like it had come fresh from a candy shop. He then presented it to her and sang Happy Birthday to her. She hugged him.

The next day, the 27th, Aria met with John and Zaeed. She had found the mechs, but she had found something else which up to that point, both sides had overlooked. It was a cache of Eclipse Combat Droids which had been left behind during the initial take over, and thanks to the criminal quality of the base, Eclipse had hidden them quite well, under a pile of security codes in a very deep dark corner of the base. But likewise the two mercenaries responsible for retrieving them had been killed and the means to activate the droids had been lost.

"Let me get Tali and Liara to look at this," suggested John.

On the 28th, Cerberus began to probe again, which led John to suspect that Petrovsky had new troops and was testing the defenses again. But thanks to the static quality of the front, the mercs had fortified extensively. It was clear that Cerberus was trading life for life by attacking and the fact that Petrovsky stopped the probes after two days told John that he still did not equal them in troop strength. The two fleets continued to spar outside among the asteroids, but Petrovsky could not block the supply route to the bridgehead. Then Admiral Gerrel sent in a Battalion of Quarian Special Opts for training under the command of Kal'Reegar. And John began to formulate a new plan which would add to the plan already in operation.

The idea was simple enough. There was a narrow passageway to the Mecs and Droids which was not guarded since it was beneath the main walkways and connected several abandoned basements. The idea was quite simple, slip into the warehouse where the Combat Mecs were being kept, dismantle them, and have the Combat Droids haul the pieces back behind the lines and then use both resources for a new push.

"You're guddam crazy," was Zaeed's first impression. "But I like it."

'What's nice about it," reflected Aria. "Is that it's four blocks behind the front lines. So he won't have much back there other than token guards."

"Even so, we'll have to move fast," explained John. "Here's how it's going to go down. The Quarian Special Opts will move through the pathway and secure each point, remaining in stealth. Then Team Normandy will move down the path to secure the droids. There, Tali and Liara with the rest of the Special Opts will crack the codes of the droids and program them to carry the Ymir Mechs and Atlas Mechs, dismantled, back to behind their lines. Then we proceed to the warehouse, secure it, form a redoubt and hold long enough for the special opts to dismantle the Atlas's and evacuate them. Then we retreat, blowing the place behind us so that they'll suspect sabotage. We will have exactly fifteen minutes to dismantle the mechs before Petrovsky begins to suspect more than sabotage.

The operation was set for February 2nd so that Zaeed could plan a simultaneous offensive to keep Petrovsky and Cerberus busy. During that time, Team Normandy and the Quarian Special opts simply rehearsed the operation over and over again. On February 1st, Tali had a horrible case of nerves and was particularly jumpy, having a hard time getting to sleep that night. John just held her and gently caressed her back while she fretted and worried about him getting killed.

At 0600, the entire line opened up with every single mercenary pushing forward trying to expand the bridgehead. As Zaeed had suspected, weak points in the Cerberus line would be exposed and he would put some reserves into that attack and push forward. Then Petrovsky would throw in his reserves and compromise the gains. Zaeed began to realize that Petrovsky was very good at this sort of fight, but he didn't worry if Petrovsky turned out the winner at the end of the day. His job was simply to take what he could and if he failed, that wasn't the point of the operation anyway. Even so, he was pleased that just two weeks of drilling sections of the Mercenary units had produced a superior force which was taking fewer casualties and likewise making Cerberus work hard for their victories.

Now at this point, one would suspect that the author would throw in some horrible complication which would force Team Normandy to fight against horrible odds and outrageous circumstances in order to achieve a simple fetch and carry it mission. But believe it or not, there is such a thing as a mission which goes off without a hitch. It can actually happen that the codes are cracked in record time, the droids are swiftly reprogrammed, and the Ymir and Atlas mechs are swiftly dismantled and everything is carried back to the base while the warehouse explodes with a satisfying boom.

The problem was that the Mercenaries took 259 casualties, ended up possessing a single new block, and Cerberus had lost only 126. And by the time John was able to come up with a new offensive plan to employ those Droids and Mechs, Petrovsky had achieved numerical parity.

And so a week of February rolled by. And as for 'the front' it was now almost entirely a sniper war. Ad hoc mirror viewers which would look around corners, drones cloaked and silently hovering, deliberate power outages to produce shadows, these were the tactics along the fronts which were separated by a single walk way or bridge. There was the constant rattle of gunnery throughout the entire base, but this would be punctuated by the sudden crack of a high powered sniper rifle which only fired once, but always killed. The saying among the troops was that if you heard the crack of the sniper rifle, you were not the target since the bullet impacted your brain before the noise reached you.

Then on the fourteenth, John pulled out the new tactic. The strategy was simple enough. The wider the front lines, the more decisive troop concentrations would be. So the push would be along the edge. Second of all, more ring guns meant less room for the maneuvering of Petrovsky's fleet. Finally, the mercs needed a victory for moral purposes. Two blocks were designated as the objectives. Once again, the entire front opened up, and the Atlas Mechs, supplemented with the Ymir's moved down the main walkways with the lesser droids scanning the sides of the buildings for Cerberus heads. While combat Droids were the least dangerous foe a soldier could face they were very good as recon because they could be programmed to spot all movement and paint such spots for the Ymirs and Atlas's. This kept Cerberus heads down until a missile launcher could be brought to bear and Petrovsky did not have those yet. The exploding warehouse had fooled him. Since there was no way (to his knowledge) that the mechs could have been transported across the lines, it made perfect sense that the mechs had been destroyed. The operation was successful, and so the next day two more blocks were designated and once again, the Mercs were able to move forward. The tactic continued to be successful, and over the next week, a full 15 blocks fell to Aria's forces. And then the first rocket launchers arrived on the field and by the time Cerberus was done, John had lost nearly all the Mechs and Droids, as well as 6 blocks. Once again, the front stabilized. But there was still good news. The mercenary teams which were being given drill were coming back in better shape after each fight and more and more mercenaries wanted to mesh with their fellow team mates.

"Keep this up," observed Garrus one evening as they all sat around a makeshift kitchen eating canned goods, "and Omega will end up a military power."

"It's always a risk," admitted John, scraping the bottom of a tomato ravioli can with his spoon. "But we can at least trust Aria to keep her promise for the duration of the Reaper war. If the Reapers win, it won't matter how well they are trained now will it?"

"A prospect no one here wishes to think about," admitted Garrus. "It's the assumption that we will win, based upon your persistent optimism about it, that leads me to make such a warning."

"All I know Garrus," John replied. "Is that something I do will bring about the victory. I don't know if I will win it or not. I might even lose it but set something up so that someone else wins it. Believe me I tried to get a straight answer."

"So we could lose in this generation but win in the next generation," mused Garrus.

"Or the next cycle," replied John.

Tali shook her head violently.

"No!" she said firmly. "Not with Rannoch being settled. Not yust after we get our home world back."

John was quiet. He knew better than try to explain it to her.

"Well that explains why Liara is busy with that cycle history she's been busy writing with Javik," said Garrus quietly.

"How's it going," asked John quietly.

"I wish she were Quarian," replied Garrus. "She's spending an awful lot of time with Javik."

Tali reached over and gave Garrus's hand a firm squeeze.

"It's okay Ducky," he said. "She still comes back to our room every night, and she still talks to me about all the personal stuff, but Javik's typical arrogance about primitives and what they're good for is really getting on my nerves. And she remains determined to work with him 'to learn'."

"I hope at some point he grows a heart," sighed John.

"There are moments," replied Tali. "I've teased him horribly about how he secretly likes people. He denies it vociferously, but I keep using his denials as evidence. He doesn't know how to deal with it, so he declares the conversation over with, and I simply don't shut up."

"See?" joked John. "Even Protheans can have their minds clouded by Quarian Monkey Ducks."

"Now why does this remind me of something I noticed this afternoon," mused Garrus.

"Clouded minds?" queried Tali.

"Yes, a symbol which has been showing up on some of the walls, a triple T inscription over an oval."

"Sounds like just a gangland symbol," shrugged John.

"Easily, but this one has only been showing up recently, like in the past two weeks, and what's more, where ever it's shown up, there are corpses of Cerberus troops nearby."

"Oh, what sort of Cerberus troops?" asked John suddenly interested.

"Sniper and spotter teams," answered Garrus. "And it's beginning to show. I was wondering why I could only hear Crack-fire's mating call only once or twice a day, used to be he spoke much more often."

"So something behind their lines is doing good stuff and leaving a trademark," mused John.

"Several somethings, it takes at least an hour to set up a good firing position and I found six teams just yesterday patrolling with Liara along the entire front."

"Our snipers?"

"Now Commander you know I would love to take credit for so many sniper kills but snipers are not particularly able to kill each other since we both know what the other would do in such in such a position. If there's one sniper team in the area where another sniper team is at, the first thing the spotter does is look for the falling corpse, and then note the way they fell, and then runs a bead up the bullet path to the most likely spot for a spotter head to pop out and get the sniper trained on that spot. Then the other spotter shows up, gets shot at and the other sniper looks at a ducking or dead spotter and knows it's time to move. Then they look for a good place to get the first sniper team and of course the first sniper team has already made themselves scarce."

"Two shots," mused John.

"Yep, two shots," answered Garrus.

"You know, with Liara spotting for you, Garrus," suggested Tali. "It's possible she knows she's more likely to get killed and so is working hard with Javik while she's still alive."

"It's a nice sentiment Tali, and I hope you're right. I have no illusions about us being together forever, but I'm not quite ready to let her go just yet. In the meantime what I've figured out is that who ever is behind those graffiti markings is someone who knows Omega's plumbing as well as Aria. Someone we need to connect with. A little coordination and we could blow this front wide open and make some real progress."

"An end to the stalemate would be nice," agreed John. "Of the 250 'blocks' in this station, we control exactly 20. But it's clear that Petrovsky does not have the troops he needs to take us out."

"When we attack, we still take more than he does," reflected Garrus. "But when he attacks, we trade man for man and something tells me he does not have complete confidence in his replacement rate."

"Think Tim is cutting him loose?"

"And abandon the Terminus systems?" queried Garrus. "I highly doubt that. But it's possible that Tim is running out of money."

"How?" asked Tali.

"Reapers," replied Garrus. "Own a million gold mines? If you have no miners, what good is it?"

John nodded. "Labor is getting hard to come by, if you're not running for cover, you're goo in a tube being squeezed into a new bug. And if you own a million stocks? What good are they if the factories are rubble?"

"And fighting a war is always an expensive proposition," finished Garrus. "I suspect Tim did not realize just how much money he would have to spend to keep 3,000 men fighting and fed on a day to day basis."

"How's Aria doing it then?" asked Tali.

"Easy," replied John smiling. "She's Asari, her investments are on Thessia and Illium and in underworld firms. She's still got a steady paycheck. I suspect Tim does not."

"And mercenaries are cheap. You don't need to give them armor and weapons and food, that's what the paycheck is for," added Garrus. "Of course you pay for it in lower quality fighting material."

"But I would have thought most of her creds were coming from Omega itself," replied Tali.

"If she was smart not at all," answered John. "Omega is still too much a wild card, a shift in the local power structure and there go your investments. She probably got her play money from Afterlife and her real cash from off base connections. And if your money is not located on Omega, when someone tries to take Omega, you'll have the means to take it back."

"Nothing to do with present situations," replied Garrus. "Of course, if the Reapers are thinking of pushing into Asari systems, it could explain Aria's present determination to regain Omega. She's about to lose her off base money, she needs a base to move that money to so she can put it somewhere else off base safe from the Reapers."

"If there's any place which will be safe from the Reapers," sighed John.

There was the cracking booming sound of a widow being fired somewhere nearby. All three of them inwardly jumped while they all strove to remain outwardly calm.

"Right now, there are other things trying to kill me that have my more immediate attention," observed Garrus.

"I . . . hate . . . that . . . noise," muttered Tali.

And another day passed.

"Stalingrad, Baghdad, New York," mused John as he and Aria patrolled the front.

"What are you talking about?" whispered Aria looking out a port window with a special mod on her omni-tool.

"Three famous city battles where snipers were the dominant force," he replied in an equally low voice. They were slowly working their way just behind Cerberus lines trying to track down the source of those 'Talon' graffiti trademarks.

"I had no idea it would work out like this," sighed Aria. "I figured we'd sail in and throw the bastards out like they did us."

"Never works like that with a military force, unless that force is composed only of civilians given guns and proclaimed an army by decree. Once you have a trained force lead by a competent general, it becomes a slug fest just like this. The only advantage we happen to have right now is the fact that Petrovsky can retreat if he thinks he has to. If he had no means of retreat . . . he would be fighting like the devil himself."

"Okay, what is that?" asked Aria.

John likewise looked out the window.

A vorcha was burning into a pile of ash having encountered a holographic wall of orange light. As soon as there was nothing left but a smoldering film of ash, John and Aria moved up to the spot, carefully checking for any signs of movement.

"Poor idiot," suggested John.

"Something tells me these force-fields are going to be a problem," suggested Aria.

"You think?" replied John with a grim smile. "Are we blocked?"

"Not this time," replied Aria. "Come here." And she led him to another one of the hundreds of little back alleys and passageways which made it possible for them to move back and forth across the lines with little trouble. John wished he could find a way to exploit these small 'holes' in the front, but any troop concentration was noted by Petrovsky, and while he didn't know where the holes were, he knew how to counter them, specifically by defense in depth.

"This way," she motioned, opening a door. She moved through an old office, which had, before the occupation, no doubt been used by someone for something (probably violent) since John found a modified shotgun barrel in the trash can. He then noted she was busy fiddling with a set of inset shelving along a wall.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Letting you in on a secret," she replied with a wicked grin. Asari up to no good had a very distinct way of smiling which looked almost frightening enough to make you want to back away slowly. The wall opened up and there was a ladder going down. She and John both took it and the next thing John knew, they were in a very dark room with lots of shadows and hiding places. Aria began to frown and slowly scan the room. John suspected she suspected they were not alone. He began to instinctively sweat. In theory, Cerberus didn't know where they were, but likewise, they didn't know where Crack-fire (or any other Cerberus sniper) was either. And only one of them would hear his opening shot.

"Bang," came a feminine voice. "You're dead."

John and Aria both turned to the sound of the voice, guns pointed at the dark, though both knew that who ever had just cracked that 'joke' was going to talk first.

"Spirits," continued the voice. "Look who's shown up in my parlor."

The figure stepped into the dim light. It was a female Turian.

"Nyreen," replied Aria lowering her pistol. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Playing cat and mouse mostly," replied Nyreen. She was, like most female Turians, very narrow in figure, her facial features even more cat than Garrus's. "Just trying to stay alive. If it wasn't for these tunnels . . ."

John had his suspicions that what he was once again hearing was the Turian equivalent of the understatement.

"My tunnels," interrupted Aria. "I'm sure glad I showed them to you."

"If you hadn't," replied Nyreen. "I'm sure I'd be dead or locked up by now."

"Aria doesn't trust easily," observed John. He was now curious about these two. "I guess you two were a good friends."

"I don't know," replied Nyreen. "Are we Aria?"

"Shepherd? This is Nyreen Kandros, Ex-Turian military. We go way back." She paused. "I've got a lot of questions, but they'll have to wait. Follow us, we'll get you to safety."

"I'll do my best," replied Nyreen.

"You ready to put that gun to good use?" asked John.

"You have no idea how ready," replied Nyreen.

The three of them resumed the patrol. John was noting this large room, perfect for slipping a good platoon strength of mercenaries into behind the lines if they could find a way of reaching it from behind their lines.

"So why are you back Aria?" asked Nyreen.

"To reclaim what's mine," answered Aria.

"Left something behind I take it," stated Nyreen.

"Not something," answered Aria. "Everything."

The rest of the patrol went without incident, until they bumped into a fire-team of Cerberus. The three of them exchanged fire and then as Shepherd acted as rear guard, the three of them withdrew back to their own lines. There was a brief bit of dashing and jumping as Cerberus closed in, but outside of a few chips on the armor, no one was hurt.

As they proceeded back to the base, Aria began to talk with Nyreen.

"Nyreen, you left Omega fairly angry with me. I wasn't aware you had returned. Explain yourself."

"The truth is I never left," replied Nyreen. "A fact I went to great lengths to keep from you."

"I'm not easily duped," suggested Aria. A statement which John found rather amusing. Petrovsky and now Nyreen had shown that Aria was more easily duped than she suspected. He however only cracked the slightest of smiles and made a mental note to spin it into a story he could tell Tali later. Aria began to pace. "Nyreen, you never approved of Omega's . . . What did you call it? . . . moral bankruptcy. Are you willing to defend it now?"

"You'll find me very willing to liberate this station," she replied in answer.

"Your combat skills seem a little rusty," observed Aria. "But we'll get you suited up. See the quartermaster."

Nyreen nodded and departed. Aria motioned to one of her Batarian aid de camps who nodded in reply and headed in the direction Nyreen was headed. John found this an interesting play of behaviors.

"Tell me about Nyreen," he suggested to Aria.

"She believes in a code of ethics. She oozes virtue. Proved totally inflexible when faced with my challenges, replied Aria. "Opposites attract, right? Our connection was powerful but doomed."

John nodded and departed back to Zaeed's office to get an update on the other front line issues. But Nyreen had given him a new idea. It was time to talk to . . . Archangel.

"Nyreen Kandos?" queried Garrus. "Why do you ask if I know her."

"She's been on the station since before you were Archangel," replied John. The evening cycle had begun and John, with Tali, were in their bunk-room along with Garrus and Liara. The four of them were sharing a drink and listening to the gentle rhythms of the small arms fire in the distance.

"How odd," mused Garrus. He leaned forward and folded his hands. "How very odd indeed. You would have thought wouldn't you . . ."

"Garrus!" yeeped Tali. "You're keeping me in suspense! Stop it!"

"Actually, Commander Shepherd is more familiar with my past references to Nyreen Kandos," replied Garrus. "That is if you remember the story about the tie breaker in her cabin."

"You had reach?" queried John.

"She had flexibility," replied Garrus.

The two of them looked at each other and grinned.

"You two are awful!" huffed Liara.

Tali was busy giggling. "I missed that one," she observed.

"Just before the suicide mission," replied John. "I wonder why she ended up here?"

Garrus shrugged. "Regardless, she's here now and that means something."

"What?"

"You don't hang around where you are not welcome. No one can survive on Omega by themselves. They end up dead or enslaved. Remember, I had no trouble gathering up a team to give the gangs here trouble. Nearly all my recruitment was here at the station." Garrus looked intently into John's eyes. "Commander? I would wager a round of drinks that Nyreen has a base she's drawing from. A base which has given her support all this time and no doubt is helping her in her little 'war' with the occupation."

"A base which could blow a hole in the front?" queried John.

"And enable us to pour through and make some head way," added Garrus.

John nodded.

"Aria seems to think now that we're going to do this block by block. But you and I both know that once Petrovsky realizes his position is untenable, he will retreat," he said.

"Or surrender," replied Garrus. "I know Aria seems to think he's just as bad as Tim, but so far we've not seen any atrocities with the population. No camps, no refugees, no indications that the population is suffering under the occupation."

"Aria's argument is that they are not as free as they were under her," observed John.

"That depends on your definition of freedom," retorted Garrus.

John nodded.

"The gangs were free under Aria, and as a result the common folk suffered depending on which gang was in charge. The Blue Suns? Fairly easy off. The Blood Pack? Not so lucky. Cerberus so far is doing very little to make life hard for the population and it's entirely possible that some of them are better off because they don't have extortion to pay off the gangs with."

John leaned back and grinned. Tali recognized that grin. It was his "Oh goody an intellectual debate" grin.

"Are you suggesting that Cerberus is better for Omega?" he queried.

Garrus snorted. "We've both seen the light side of Cerberus, people like Jacob and Miranda who were trying to do something good for the galaxy, perfectly happy to work with me and Tali and Mordin. That willingness to go the whole way to save innocent lives from a dark and brutal fate. And we've seen the dark side of Cerberus, the complete and total willingness to expend individual people for the goal. Right now Cerberus is better for these people, because it is in Cerberus' interests to keep the population secure. But I think you and I both know what is going to happen to ordinary people once Tim is securely in control of Omega. When he starts putting Reaper technology into the various 'test subjects' which Omega will no doubt find itself supplying him. After all . . ." and here Garrus paused. "It's only gangs who rule Omega, and only the working poor who manage to eek out their living here. What are a few poor when comparing the ultimate fate of humanity?"

John seemed to think for a moment.

"Nyreen is going to have a support group," concluded Garrus. "And we need that support group stirring up trouble. The more restless the population, the more men Petrovsky has to employ in patrolling the streets. That's fewer on the front. Fewer on the front? We'll be able to resume offensive operations. And likewise, we'll be able to start recruiting from the population. And the more station blocks we control? That's a bigger population base to recruit from."

"You had me worried there Garrus," said John. "I thought you were going to make a case that Cerberus was the answer for Omega."

Garrus shook his head. "Cerberus will never be the answer to anything, but right now, we have to make the people of Omega understand that."


	31. Chapter 31 - Elephants

Nyreen, Aria, John, Zaeed, Garrus, Liara, and Tali were all seated at a round table. It was a completely enclosed room, not a single window or vent to allow any entry save the doorway which was guarded by over a dozen Blue Suns.

"Here's the skeleton of the plan," began John. "Nyreen will be going back across the lines and start forming resistance groups."

"These are not people capable of fighting," argued Nyreen.

"You're going to have to be a little adjustable if you want to free Omega from Cerberus," suggested Aria.

"Actually Nyreen has got a point," replied John.

"What?" snapped Aria.

"These people are no good to us dead," continued John. "But by being just annoying, they can be very good to us alive. All they have to do, is riot, shout, make trouble, break windows, nothing which Petrovsky can justify opening fire on, but likewise, forcing him to patrol the streets with men which won't be at the front."

"And what makes you think he won't open fire?" argued Aria. "It's what I would do."

"Precisely," answered John. "But Oleg is not like you. He's a general, and like any general, he knows that the only way he can be certain to make things worse with this civilian resistance, is to open fire on them. He will try everything he can to assuage the population, but not provoke them. For the moment members of the population start to get shot, they start joining our side and Petrovsky knows we'll train them before we put them into the fight."

"Then we want them to open fire!" argued Aria. "What better way than to shoot a couple of times at them?"

Nyreen rolled her eyes and looked at Garrus.

"Then Petrovsky pulls out the propaganda front and lets everyone know that this particular civilian did the dirty deed. And ninety percent of the volunteers we could have had, don't show up because it was only the natural reaction to a nut case."

"So? We still get reinforcements which we won't get if Petrovsky manages to keep his troops in order! You don't understand Omega. These are my people. When the time is right, they'll fight. They love a good street fight."

"And they'll die accomplishing nothing," retorted John. "These are not gangs vying for 'turf' Aria. These Cerberus are professional soldiers, and history is filled with professionals, hell even trained civilian forces, cutting down street mobs. It's a rule of warfare girl, a street gang has got the scary down pat, they've got the shooting down pat, they've got the armor, and they know the terrain. But even so, up against professionals? They die like flies.

"At the same time," suggested Garrus. "We do have one advantage. Petrovsky will do what he can to keep his men in line, but when you belong to a human first organization, you tend to attract a lot of bigots. Petrovsky will have more than trouble keeping his own troops in line. So Aria, I don't think you need to worry about incidents stirring up the population. It's just that if it happens this way, Cerberus looks to be entirely at fault which is in our best interests."

Nyreen seemed to smile at that. "Never hurts to do it the right way does it?" she observed.

Aira clearly remained skeptical.

The next day, Nyreen vanished once more into the plumbing of Omega and the team waited for her signal that something was going down. In the meant time, both sides continued to reinforce and train. John continued to observe the day to day battle and Zaeed kept making his own observations as well. As March proceeded, it became clear that when ever Petrovsky felt he had an advantage, he would press it. But never so much that he would cripple himself trying to take a position.

On the 13th of March, they got the signal, there would be a massive demonstration in 48 hours. And it proved to be a big one. Nyreen's forces persisted in creating constant trouble forcing Petrovsky to commit more and more forces to maintaining order. And so the entire front opened up and the Mercenaries began to push forward. Cerberus was so caught off guard that the Mercenaries, now with new training and team work, were able to advance forward and John and Zaeed both just let them keep going. Team Normandy continued to work along the sides, pushing to secure more rim guns which acted to make a wider swath for their own fleet to operate while making it harder for Cerberus to intercept.

It turned out that Nyreen had secured control of a small gang, known as the Talons. When Cerberus had taken over, they were mostly a drug dealing gang just beginning to work their way into the under-structure taking advantage of the void left by Archangel's purge. Under Nyreen's tutelage, the Talons had rediscovered themselves as a pack of freedom fighters who knew how to snipe Cerberus from behind. While the humans had not cared for them, the Asari, Turians, Vorcha, and Batarians who were now second class citizens under Cerberus, had developed a romantic view of them. The offensive lasted a full six days, and over 15 blocks were seized, but losses were close to 1,000 for John's men and 750 for Cerberus. Both sides had to stop and work at consolidation.

It could have been more successful if it had not been for the fact that Petrovsky once again knew how to counter them. Petrovsky, by focusing on the 'alien gang' imagery of the Talons was able to keep his human sympathy. In fact, several smaller human gangs were beginning to move into what had been Talon territory, and as they didn't care who joined them, those of the alien races who were criminals to begin with had no problem working for another gang who kept the credits flowing. In the long run, these human gangs with Cerberus patronage would create a bad taste in the mouth of the ordinary residents, but for the moment, everything was focused on The Talons. And the payback came quickly.

Within a week of the offensive's conclusion, Team Normandy had to engage in a rescue operation which showed John's ability to improvise. Pressure on the Talons had reached such a point that Nyreen was forced to work her entire gang towards the lines in an effort to slip through. John, knowing her point of entry, made a sudden push himself which caught the entire Cerberus block in a bind, suddenly being attacked from both sides. Cerberus pulled out, but failed to retreat intelligently and when it was all over with, John was in possession of nine more blocks. Then Cerberus counter attacked and Aria's forces lost three of those blocks. But there was one last advantage to the entire affair. Nyreen's Talons likewise knew the plumbing of Omega well, and for the rest of the campaign, Talon would slip through the lines, recruit, and bring back volunteers which helped offset the losses the Mercenaries were suffering from. It was a nice advantage, but it didn't have the same impact as an armed resistance behind the lines. But for the moment, with Cerberus keeping a good section of the population loyal, such a movement was simply not possible.

And so on the 25th of March, John found himself staring at the maps of Omega again in his quarters. Of the 250 blocks of Omega, they now held 32 of them. Aria looked at the map and was pacing back and forth irritated. Nyreen and Garrus were behind her, along with Liara and Tali. Tali was busy brewing tea. And seated in the corner, looking relaxed and rather smug, was Zaeed.

"Eight weeks," grumbled Aria. "Eight FUCKING weeks and we're still stuck here. How the hell did he do it?"

"I think we already told you how he did it," sighed John.

"Spare me," she groused. "At the rate we're going it will be over a full year before we get him out, and that's with no guarantee that I'll have his head mounted on a pole."

"Waging a battle just to put the other guy's general's head on a pole won't help win it," suggested John.

"You have to admit, he's good," mused Garrus. "There hasn't been a single plan we've tried which he hasn't proven capable of blunting. The only advantage we have so far is that he knows he'll spend his entire force to throw us out, and then he'll have nothing left to control Omega with. The Talons have blunted his ability to wage a full offensive campaign to drive us out."

"Which is about what he would be guddam doin'," groused Zaeed. "If I read his dispositions right. He's got his full three thousand in Omega now, and we've got ours, and he knows if he just attacks, we trade man for man and life for life. But . . . then the Talons throw him out and he knows it."

"And he's lost," finished John. "So we're back at stalemate with snipers shooting and everyone else ducking or dying."

The conversation ended with Aria grumbling about how much money this whole operation was costing her, and there were more and more probes on the Asari borders by the Reapers. It was clear to John that her fortune was tied up in Asari interests and if she didn't take Omega before the Reapers moved into Asari space, her funds just might dry up and once again Petrovsky would have won.

John and Tali lay upon their bed. While there was still the sounds of small arms fire in the background, thanks to the expansion of the front, it was a fainter sound these days.

"Yahn?" she asked him. "Why are we here?"

John sighed.

"Tali? I honestly think this is the dress rehearsal for Team Normandy on Earth. We are here, slogging through an enemy who refuses to be beaten so that we'll be ready for Harbinger."

"I wish I could be as sure as you are," she sighed. "Because I yust don't see it."

"Tali?" whispered John. "I have a confession to make."

"What Yahn?"

"I'm just guessing," he admitted. "I really don't know."

"Then why are you telling me . . ."

"Because you are my wife, and I love you, and this is the conclusion that I've made and I tell you everything because you have a right to it. But the only thing I'm going on is the simple fact that I was dead, and I saw in the eyes of God a trillion what ifs. And I know that there's a reason for everything that happens. You should have gotten over me, but you didn't, because in order for me to be able to do this . . . I needed you holding me through the hard times. I shouldn't have come back, but I was sent back. Because it's going to take someone who doesn't fear death to do this. There was no reason why Rannoch should have been restored to you and your people, but there was Legion, and he was willing to talk. And suddenly, it became a possibility and because I loved you, I saw it as something to do for you. If I hadn't loved you Tali, you would be still wandering on the migrant fleet. If I hadn't screwed up so badly at the Alpha Relay . . . I would not have hesitated to let the Geth perish. So many events which have led to this moment Tali. All I can do is speculate on why, but I know there is a why. There's a reason."

"But what if you're wrong?" she asked. "What if this is a horrible mistake and . . ."

"Tali Duck, it's not a horrible mistake. If fighting Cerberus keeps the relay scrap and resources coming in, then the Quarians will be able to focus entirely on the crucible and prepare their fleet for the final battles and . . . Well look at all that will be able to be done if Aria is back in control of Omega. They're talking about a Dyson Sphere behind the Omega Relay, one which will protect remnants of each race from harvest by the Reapers, like the Protheans tried to do. What if that's the thing that makes victory over the Reapers possible? What if, in 500 years, a couple of million of each of the races wakes up, with the full memory of what the Reapers are and were, and proceeds to build accordingly, with 50,000 years to look for them while the Reapers are in stasis? They'll never know what hit them. If that's what happened, if that is what I have to make possible? Then that's my job."

"But Yahn . . . the Reapers know about the Omega Four Relay. Harbinyer was there on that station fighting us," argued Tali.

"And Harbinger knows we destroyed it," replied Shepherd. "Now if you had a base on a particular asteroid which was destroyed by your enemies, what would you do?"

"Go back and see what was left of it so we could use the scrap," replied Tali.

John chuckled. "You are such a Quarian," he groaned. "What if there was no scrap?"

"Yahn . . ." answered Tali somewhat exasperated. "There's always scrap left."

John turned to face his Quarian wife. He looked at her visor, at the faint white eyes behind the purple tinted mask. Just the bare outline of her nose was visible outside of the eyes. He took a moment trying to see through that glass, trying to see that face. She seemed to know what he was thinking. She raised her gloved hand and gently stroked his face.

"I'm sorry Yahn," she whispered. "I really am. It is times like this that I hate my suit as much as you do."

John rolled back on his back, and gave Tali a gentle pull. She picked up on the cue and rolled up on top of him, resting her arms on his chest. He could feel her feet instinctively trying to wrap around his ankles. It didn't last long of course. He paused to remember that moment back on the road from Peak 15, when he first noticed her feet making those movements while she was trying to get some sleep and he wondered if she had been dreaming of him at that moment. But her feet stopped trying, since her boots lacked the flexibility to enable her toes to grip his ankles. That was sad to some extent, but likewise, she was able to look him directly in the face and he was able to rest his arms upon her back. It was a nice way to talk when you couldn't make love. He mused for a second at how light she seemed to be when she was resting upon him like this, and how heavy she seemed to be when she was sitting on his lap. But he wasn't there to contemplate her relative weight pressure points on his body.

"Tali," he said after a moment of them adjusting. "The Reapers are not interested in scrap. They are only interested in organics, which they break down and process into other Reapers. There are no living beings beyond the Omega Four Relay, and the Reapers know that. They know it's just a gigantic pile of ruined and savaged ships, with a single blown up base, in orbit around a black hole. There is nothing there for them to harvest, and they were there when the nothing happened. They have no reason to go back and so they won't. Unless they are clued in that we're hiding sufficient population there to be a threat. And we know that we can hide population like that, because that is exactly what the whole Ilos phase of our history was about, the direct consequences of a group of Prothean scientists successfully going into stasis until after the Reapers had left."

Tali was quiet for a moment.

"Yahn?" She said. "I don't want to go into stasis. Even with you. I want to stay alive and fight with you to the end."

"But what if there's nothing left to fight for, save protecting those in stasis from being betrayed? What if that is all that's left?"

Tali's first response was simply to put her head on his chest and hold him tightly.

"NEVER!" she suddenly shouted. "I WILL NEVER LOOSE YOU OR RANNOCH! IF THEY COME WE MEET THEM ON MY HOME! AND WE DIE DEFENDING IT!"

She was looking directly at his face. In spite of her visor, he felt as if those two white eyes were burning right through his skull, so intense was her stare.

"Yes dear," John weakly offered.

"That's more like it," she said grimly. "I'm not going to hide. And neither is my bond-mate. Let the cowards go to the Dyson sphere. We will die together fighting them to the last."

And with that, they settled down. Tali slid off of him and snuggled up next to him. He got the distinct impression that she had just made a decision which she needed to make and now that she had made it, there was going to be a consequence down the road. But he then noticed something else a few moments later as he lay there listening to the far off sounds of small arms fire. Tali was, for the first time in nearly two months, doing heelrou.

A sudden feeling of love seemed to bubble up inside of him. He simply was so happy that she was there.

"I love you Ducky," he whispered. And then he too fell asleep.

His omni-tool beeped way to soon in his opinion, and when he checked it, he received genuine confirmation that it really was way too soon. It was only 0247 hours. He had barely been asleep four hours. There was a message which had set it off, from Garrus, which told him to get to the front line, in armor, pronto. He got up, walked over and got into his armor. He paused once and looked back at Tali silently sleeping. He resisted the urge to give her a wake up squeeze and took the elevator down to the sky-car depot where he was able to meet up with Garrus a half an hour later.

Garrus was with Liara, in a very nicely arranged sniper hole, with just enough of a hole that a small scope could poke out of it and see more than enough. She was busy looking through it while Garrus was behind her seated with his gun resting against his chest.

"Glad you could make it to the Garrus Liara love nest," he suggested.

"So what's the reason for this invitation this early morning?" asked Shepherd.

"Take a look," offered Liara.

John adjusted his Omni-tool and a small scope began to look out of the hole. For a moment he just looked.

"Awfully quite across the front lines," he observed. "I see nothing at all."

"Precisely," replied Garrus. "They're up to something and it's taking them a bit of time to get up to it."

"Have you alerted Zaeed?"

"Yes," replied Garrus. "And he said he was alerted in his usual fashion. I presume he's giving the entire line the heads up. But likewise, he's keeping most of the troops down so that there is no indication that we're aware that Cerberus is up to something."

John continued to peer through the scope and continued to see absolutely nothing.

"I hate moments like this," he grumbled as the minutes ticked by. "To know that they are about to do something and you don't know what it is, save that it's going to ruin someone's day."

Then, all along the line, this vibrating screeching sound was heard. Liara promptly got her scope up and along with John they starting looking all over the place.

"By the Goddess!" Liara cried.

Coming out of the Cerberus controlled buildings were dozens, if not hundreds of stumpy vaguely humanoid shaped black things, weapons grafted onto their arms, and shielded by a thick glowing blue biotic globe. One could have presumed some horrible mutation of the Volus, but they were much bigger.

"REAPERS!" shouted John. He got on his Omni-tool broadcast function. "All units to the front, Reaper soldiers are advancing."

Garrus began to calmly snipe at the advancing hoards, but it wasn't more than a few moments when they realized their position was compromised and they were forced to start to move.

"Elephants," muttered John.

"Elephants?" asked Liara. "What does zoology have to do with this sudden attack?"

Several biotic blasts and bullets riddled the area around them. They ducked behind a set of inset desks. Liara waited for her shields to regenerate a bit and then stood up and blew a biotic hole through the advancing reaper troops. Then John opened up with his assault rifle and Garrus proceeded to engage in head shots on the front troops. For a few moments they were busy blowing up black bodies and watching them explode into a green goo all the while ducking back to let shields recharge.

"When the Romans were fighting Epirius," answered John in a lull as they were pushing back towards their troop concentrations, "The Greeks unleashed an elephant squadron on them. They had never seen something that big and grey and nasty before. The line nearly fell apart from all those farm boys panicking at the 'monsters.' To this day in human military history, the term 'seeing the elephant' is used to refer to the first experience of the terror of combat."

"So why?" asked Liara. "You've fought Reaper troops already."

"I have," groaned John. "You have, and so has Garrus. So has Team Normandy. But the mercenaries have not. The whole line is in trouble."

"We have to get Team Normandy up and running," shouted Garrus.

John nodded while Liara began to broadcast the code talk signals which would let Shepherd's team mates dash to a designated meeting point. Normally John would be doing such things but right at that moment, he was busy providing covering fire for Garrus's sniper shots. It was a constant duck and run, the three of them busy ducking from room to room, dashing across side walkways, ducking through blast doors as they were shutting, and always pushing back to their head quarters, having to duck advancing Reaper forces the entire way. It was becoming apparent that Petrovsky had found a way to counter their knowledge of Omega's plumbing and he was pulling the same trick on them that they had pulled on him successfully several times.

"I hate surprise attacks," shouted John as they ducked behind yet another extended wall, after having to clear the area of yet more of those humanoid bulbous reaper creatures.

"When you're the one surprised that is," quipped Garrus.

"Yeah," agreed John with a grim grin.

"Loco!" came Vega's voice over the com. "What's with these things coming out of Aria's secret passageways?"

"Will explain later," replied John. "Right now get to Alpha Point and we'll push form there."

"Loco! Alpha Point is compromised, they're everywhere."

"By the Goddess," muttered Liara. "Just when you think it can't get worse."

"Oh God not Tali, not Tali, not Tali, please not Tali," began to pray John.

"Clear the mind Commander," snarled Garrus. "You can't afford to let your personal feelings interfere with the battle. Three thousand lives are riding on this."

"Thanks Garrus," grumbled John. But inside his heart, he was screaming with terror. He continued to pray, but it was slightly different. And as he did so, he found himself calming down and beginning to think clearly.

"Team Normandy," began Garrus over the public link. "This is XO Garrus, Alpha point is compromised, proceed to Beta Point."

John continued to shoot as they proceeded.

"Thanks again Garrus," he said the moment there was another lull. "I don't know what I would do without you."

"It's what friends are for, Commander," replied Garrus. "Picking up the dropped pieces. What really amazes me is that this hasn't happened to you sooner. Not that I'm complaining."

John gave another grim grin. It wasn't often Garrus complimented, but it was always just when he needed the boost.

"Blue here, Beta Point is occupied. I'm with Mex and Red. No sign of Duck, Crest, Bugs, or Shepherd."

"Gig reporting, Commander Shepherd is with Crest and Bugs. Alpha and Beta remain compromised. Chances of any meeting point not having Adjutant presence only at 5.29%."

"All units of Team Normandy," ordered Shepherd. "My 20. Continue to close, we will remain mobile."

All around them where the sounds of firing and the screeches of that which EDI had identified as Adjutants. What ever those were. As John switched to other channels he could hear over and over again Zaeed snapping orders, moving troops, securing positions. There were howls of Krogan and snarls of Vorcha from Blood Pack, Asari screams from Eclipse, and Turian grunts from Blue Suns. And every so often Aria would break in and snap orders, usually with the sort of colorful language which up to that point only had come from the mouth of the pre-suicide mission Jack. Only Nyreen remained calm as she instructed Talon forces.

"Men into Women and Women into Men," muttered John.

"What now?" asked Liara as the three of them ducked behind a jumbled collection of refuse bins and opened up on charging Adjutants. The creatures exploded into messy green slime.

"Battle of Salamis," answered John. "The Greek Fleet led by Athens caught the Persian fleet by surprise and slaughtered it. Only one squadron of Persians ships escaped without loss and that was led by a woman who skillfully fought her way out of the trap and took a few Greek ships along with her as trophies. That was the thing the Persian Emperor said when he saw the battle play out. I forget who her name was."

"This is Zaeed reporting. Everything has guddam blown open. All units proceed to central point on block and spread back out from there, got it? Quit trying to plug up holes. It's all guddam swiss cheese. So form redoubts and counter attack damn it. Counter attack from the redoubts. Until then quit trying to be guddam heroes and for the cowards, get your ass in line and shoot at the damn things. You can kill them easy, I've over two dozen on my Jessie already shit-heads."

"Zaeed's gotten his . . . manhood back I see," suggested Garrus.

"I didn't think he'd be thrown out for long if at all," answered Shepherd.

They rounded the corner, shot down three more Adjutants, and met up with EDI.

"Commander," she said. "It is most propitious that we have met. I was beginning to experience stress in my relays over the numbers of Adjutants."

"What can you tell me about them?" asked John.

"They are something which only recently Cerberus began experimenting on. Using Reaper technology which Tim has acquired, they were manufactured, as is all Reaper based sythetic life. Their method of reproduction is particularly unsettling. They operate as a virus, seeking to wound their targets and take them alive to a central point were over a period of several hours they transform into more Adjutants. While their weapons are not particularly high quality, they make up for it by numbers and the fact that civilian populations are easy targets for their 'harvesting'."

"What about their weapons, can their weapons do the same thing?" asked Liara.

"Uncertain," replied EDI. "I am only able to go on what information has been gleaned from Cerberus communications and analyzed over the past three weeks."

"Why not before?" asked John.

"I was thinking of hyper-spacial wave lengths then," explained EDI. "I only tapped into Cerberus communications because I was . . . bored."

"Why didn't you tell me?" snapped Liara. "That was crucial information!"

"It was not in reference to the present operations," explained EDI. "It was chatter. There was nothing in the chatter that suggested that the Adjutants were either present on Omega, or in sufficient numbers to be used on Omega, or even being planned to be used on Omega."

"Looked like junk data," grumbled John. "Perfect way to fool analysis."

Over the next fifteen minutes, the four of them proceeded to move from point to point, shooting more Adjutants. They reached another plaza and after clearing it of more of the Reaper creatures, they found James, Kaiden, and Javik who jogged up to them.

"In my cycle," grumbled Javik. "We didn't have these creatures. We had others. I'm not sure which I prefer. Actually I don't prefer either."

Once again, John was reminded that Tali was MIA.

"God," he thought. "Why didn't I wake her up and bring her with me like I was thinking of doing . . . Why am I going to lose her now? Does this mean Rannoch will fall? That we'll all be in Dyson Spheres?"

As almost always, there was no answer immediately forthcoming.

"Time for grief later," he reminded himself. He found it interesting that even though a little part of him was shrieking in agony over the uncertainty of her fate, it was just a little part and his mind was clear. His prayers for a clear head had been answered. That little part of him grieving was tucked away under lock and key, to be let out only when it was appropriate to do so. He understood, as much as he wanted to fully express such grief it was not the time. He had to focus on those who's lives were depending upon him. Cerberus was showing more similarities with the Reapers, and John was beginning to suspect that Tim was already in the throes of indoctrination. As he had noticed on the derelict Reaper, there was something about the creature itself which slowly caused everyone around it to worship it and join with it. Given enough time John mused, that derelict Reaper would have been repaired by the very Cerberus operatives who had come to study it, once they had sufficiently transformed. Like the mythological forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden, it smelled good, tasted good, was nourishing as good food, but it was death to eat. A spiritual poison which turned you into a monster before you destroyed yourself. It was an insidious quality of the Reapers. It made using their own tools against them the means of one's own destruction. The more you studied them, the more like them you became.

Then his mind went back to the Geth who had worshiped Sovereign. Saren had said that Sovereign was 'insulted'. No doubt this was what Saren's indoctrination suggested to him. Everything about Sovereign clearly showed that the Reaper depended upon the worship of his minions. How else would so many of them cooperate with the deliberate destruction of their own kinds? Once Saren began to see through the pretense, he was liberated.

Slowly John began to see the secret of indoctrination. It was worship. It was the worship of a god who stood before you, great, terrifying, and utterly able to completely dominate you. It was accomplished with a form of possession. The nanobots of the Reaper would infest the victim and over time persuade the victim that the Reapers were gods, and once one was convinced that one was in the presence of gods, one did what they were asked to by those gods. Humans would fall to it of course, but so would Asari. Now John understood why Liara's mother had succumbed. She had been indoctrinated to see the Reapers as gods and Saren their prophet. From that point on, she was utterly in his grasp and her natural inclinations for consensus and cooperation were simply shifted with the worship of the Reapers in mind.

And likewise, it made Mordin's serum that inoculated you against the Reapers also understandable. So long as those little nanobots didn't get into your brain and fill your brain with the appropriate chemicals which made you perceive the Reapers as gods, you wouldn't over time succumb. At least from Reaper technology. But likewise, it enlightened John in realizing that while Mordin's inoculation was a great thing, it wouldn't entirely protect them. Worship didn't just come from chemicals. There was both the material and spiritual component. Some would succumb before they were infested simply because the Reaper's overall physical qualities were just as gloriously terrifying as any conception of deity. Worship produced the chemicals which made worship more desirable. Like all other human desires, it's practice produced a physical response which meant that the next time would be easier and more enjoyable.

All this of course was zipping through John's mind in nanoseconds. It would take him months to fully grasp all the elements, but he realized that circumstances right then had given him an insight which he had no doubt would prove necessary.

"Okay Team," he said calm and collected. "Duck is MIA, we can't worry about her now.

The team looked at him in stunned silence.

"The lives of the entire force here on Omega depend on us stabilizing the front and then if possible, counter attacking. We are up against Reapers, Cerberus has thrown it's lot with them. This is why we are at Omega. This is why we are fighting. Let's liberate this station."

And the team galvanized itself into action.

The battle lasted for six hours. Team Normandy proceeded to move methodically through the area, relinking up the redoubts, coordinating the counter attacks, and slowly securing each and every single complex block which they still were able to hold. Once the Adjuncts had created sufficient chaos and terror, Cerberus had launched it's own attack with ordinary forces along the left flank and took six full blocks before Aria, John, Nyreen, and Zaeed were able to regroup and then deal with that threat. Cerberus had not expected the counter attack to be so quick and so at the end of nine hours, two blocks were taken back on the left.

Then everyone settled down, except for the wounded. As John had feared, even the weapons of the Adjutants infected the victims. And while every effort was made by the medical teams to stop the infections, little was found that could stop them. And within twenty four hours, every single victim, save one who had shot off his own infected leg in the first few seconds after receiving the wound was in the throes of transformation.

John had a hard time dealing with the shooting. He ordered that the moment it was clear that the victim was transforming, they were to be sealed up in a force cell and only after they had fully transformed were they to be shot. This was the practice for the first few hours. Then medical examination determined that before the physical transformation began, there was a transformation in the brain which led to the victim's actual death. It was like the dragon's teeth, the victim was killed by the impalement first, and then the organic components were taken over. From that point on, the doctors waited for the victim to die, and then their heads were cut off. That ended any chance of the Adjutant transforming the corpse. John found the process mythical in significance. Cutting off the head was a well proven way to deal with vampires in many cultures.

Finally, it was over with. The lines had been stabilized. They had lost ground, but the army was intact. Tali was still MIA. He returned to their room, noted there was no trace of her. He sat down and began to cry. He was at it for a good ten minutes or so, letting his grief work itself out, when his ears suggested that a door had just opened.

"There you are!" exclaimed a huffy chirpy alto voice. "You stupid Bosh'tet why didn't you tell me you were going. Did you know there's been a battle going on all day?"

He turned to her. She saw his tear streaks for she put her hand to her mouthpiece and stepped back.

"Yahn," she whispered. "Who did we lose today?"

He paused to try to wipe away his tears. "I thought . . . I thought I had lost you. I've been trying to get a hold of you on and off all day." Then he got angry. "Where the Hell have you been girl! Do you know how hard it is to save an army when you think you've just lost your beloved?!"

For once, Tali did not yell back. She shuddered for a second as events of the day began to congeal in her thoughts. "Oh Yahn," she whimpered. "I'm so sorry. This Bosh'tet Omni-tool was supposed to upgrade last night when I set it and it was still upgrading this morning when the alarms when out. I've been unable to communicate with anyone for any reason what so ever and it's STILL not finished. I didn't even know there was an attack until I heard the gunfire downstairs. I was still asleep until 0749."

"How," began John. "How did you survive? They were everywhere."

"I have a shotgun," suggested Tali.

Suddenly she was hugged as tightly as possible by John. She simply hugged him back.

"I would have thought," said a terse voice which was John's. "That an omni-tool would have sufficient sense to not shut down all communications while it was upgrading."

"You would think," sighed Tali. "But that's what it did. I can't get any communications out, and am not receiving any communications in."

"Let me see that," demanded John. She held up the Omni-tool. Sure enough, it was downloading an upgrade, at molasses slow speed. What should have taken fifteen seconds, was taking fifteen hours.

"Why don't you cancel the upgrade and try again," he suggested.

"Yahn," replied Tali with a certain world weary exhaustion in her voice. "I'm a Quarian. It's the first thing I tried. But not only can I not cancel and reboot, I can't even cancel. Short of complete shut down and memory wipe, I'm stuck. And given how slow I'm uploading now, how long would it take for me to completely rebuilt my tool from the cloud?"

He had been put through psychological hell by a damned upgrade. He was still holding Tali, but behind her was their bed and the crucifix hanging over it.

"Why do you do these things to me?" he mouthed to the crucifix.

"I think you know the answer," the crucifix seemed to suggest back. "If you think about it."

And the moment he thought about it, he did. He had been in the crises of battle with the belief that he had lost Tali forever. And Garrus had smacked him up'side the head when he had started to succumb to grief. He had been tested in the crucible and passed. Not with flying colors, but he had passed. Next time it would be easier. And next time it might be an awful lot more important for him to pass.

But it also suggested something else. That Tali might not live to see the defeat of the Reapers. That he would win the battle without her.

"General Sherman," began John. "An American Civil War general, said that war is hell."

"Are you sure it wasn't Mrs. Sherman?" suggested Tali with a sigh.

"Would it be horribly selfish and arrogant of me to suspect that you were worried sick about me too?" suggested John.

"No," replied Tali. "Because I was. I wake up to the sound of gunfire and those horrible screeches. I can't communicate with you or anyone in Team Normandy. I have to fight my way down to the plaza. I move from Talon group to Blue Suns group to Eclipse and over to Blood Pack. Where ever I go, there's no Yahn. Some say you are busy here. Some say you are busy there. Some say you're saving the day. Others say that you're already dead for they remember Garrus giving commands. Aria tells me to get lost. Nyreen can't help. Zaeed spends some time with me but he doesn't know where you are either and he's busy trying to get everyone working together. I lost count of all the Cerberus and Adyuncts I killed. I was coming back to the apartment and if it were empty, I figured I would cry myself to sleep and hope that when I woke up, I would be once again back in your arms."

Still holding her, John led her to their bed where he got into his sweats and got in with her. They cuddled up and sighed.

"I hate . . ." began Tali.

"This suit," finished John.

Then she giggled. Three minutes later she was doing heelrou and they fell asleep still in each other's arms.

Later during the night cycle, the crack of a sniper rifle woke Tali with a start. She looked at John, and found him asleep on his back, his mouth slightly open, his breathing deep. She looked at her omni-tool. The down load was complete and the company was informing her that thanks to the new upgrade, downloads would be even faster than they had in the past. Tali, being Quarian, was unable to roll her eyes. She merely sighed.

What a horrible day it had been. She had fallen asleep happy and secure for the first time in ages, and then woken up to the absence of John. She had spent the whole day wondering where he was. She mused for a moment that in spite of the fact that she couldn't communicate with him, she had never really suspected he might be dead until she had heard that Garrus was giving orders. And then there had been that horrible feeling of impotency. She could not communicate with him. She couldn't say "What is wrong!" like she had back in . . . Was it over a year ago already? No. It had been July. She was still struggling with the human way of measuring time. March . . . April . . . May . . . June . . . It would be four more months before July. Two Christmases' . . . That was easy to remember. The songs and presents, the love making, the pretty lights and decorations. What was it she was worried about? Oh yes, the horrible feeling she had had in July which she thought meant he was dead . . . again. She looked back at him. He was there, asleep. That face, filled with blackheads now that they were stuck in Omega. He had been so much cleaner at the apartment. And on the Normandy. But even so, his good nature still seemed to shine through.

She still found the whole thing amazing when she thought about it. Was it really true? Was this the man she really had bonded with? Did he really think she was pretty? Apparently he did. She propped herself up on her side so she could just watch him sleeping. She gently laid a hand on his shoulder and brushed her fingers across his chest. On one hand, she was amazed that she got to touch him. When she had met him, he had seemed so far above her, untouchable. And now? And now this was the very man she got to make love to. The very man who wanted to live with her for the entire length of her life. In that instant it was so much like a fairy tale, it was so much like a dream come true.

There he was, sleeping soundly, breathing deeply. The man who did so many things to tell her he loved her. He wasn't Commander Shepherd to her. He was Yahn. Her Yahn. The one who called her all those different names. So why didn't she do that back? Well, what was she supposed to call him? She had a hard time understanding why he thought she was a duck. She certainly didn't see any similarities. She understood James' nickname of Sparks. But Yahn never used that for her. He called her Kitten. Again she didn't see the semblance. But no matter. She thought for a second. That was the reason. He had told her to call him Yahn. "It's what I want the woman I love to call me," he had said. Up to that moment, he had been Commander Shepherd. He had been 'Sir, yes sir'. But once he had said, "Call me Yahn" she understood that something special had happened between them. That he had loved her back. Her feelings had been reciprocated. She had not loved in vain.

She looked at him again. And reached for his hand, and held it with both of hers. There was a scab on the forearm. Some spot where flying shrapnel or stray bullet had clipped the armor and cut him beneath it. She was reminded that humans were dirty creatures. There was always something on his face needing fixed. Of course he worked harder on his face now that she had pointed all those problems out.

But that wasn't all. He could be annoying. He would say things, deliberately she was certain, that required at least one solid punch to resolve. He absolutely refused to take certain things seriously, he just seemed to dismiss some really important things. She had complained about that to Auntie Raan and Auntie Raan has merely suggested that this was something that all bond mates did. His humanity had nothing to do with the fact that he couldn't read her mind. She had no idea why Auntie Raan had said that. She had never imagined that Yahn could read her mind.

"Simply talk with him and explain it," was Auntie's advice.

Of course she talked with him. She talked with him all the time. She spent lots of time talking to him. And sometimes she suspected he really wasn't paying a bit of attention because all he would say was "Uh huh? Yeah."

Then he shifted in his sleep. He seemed to frown. He was starting to shake again. That nightmare was starting again. Her heart went out to him. He really needed her. And that was what was so important. Her Yahn, the great champion, the great warrior, the hero of the Battle of the Citadel, slayer of Reapers, needed her.

"I love you Yahn," she whispered and she cuddled up to him. When she did that, she knew his dreaming would change. That horrible nightmare would go away.

She was a lucky girl she concluded. But she also suspected she wasn't the only girl who thought that when she was in the arms of the man who loved her.

"Wake up sleepy head. Wake up sleepy head. Wake up sleepy head. Your Tali Duck is calling!" sang a chirping alto voice into his ear. John smiled and stretched, or what parts of him he could that were not pinned down by a snuggling Tali next to him.

"Good morning Kitten," he said. He looked at her through her visor. She paused to poke at his chin and cheeks on several spots with her gloved finger. He sighed and started to get up.

"Sandpaper soap today?" he asked.

"If you would please," she suggested. "Omega is really dirty and it gets all over you. Times like this I wish you were as suited up as me."

"I'll do what I can Ducky. Gotta look handsome for my Kitten or she gets testy."

"Oh, and when you're done and we've had breakfast, Aria wants to speak with you. Says something has yust happened."

"Just happened? She said this after yesterday's Adjutant explosion?"

"Yeah, it's kinda funny that way . . . Well no it's not. There was nothing funny about those screams and those wounded. Oh Yahn, so many people we had to kill because they were only wounded. It was horrible."

She waited for John to finish cleaning himself up. When he came out, she noticed the more pink tenor of his facial skin. He had really worked to clean himself up she noted. She remembered him saying that she was the only one he had to look dashing for and her criteria was the measuring stick. He was such a sweetie that way. It was kind of hard to imagine for a moment that this man, even as late as yesterday, had caused the death of so many other living beings. While it was advantageous to imagine that the Adjutants were less than sentient, she had a sneaking suspicion that on some level, they were and for that reason, all the more pitiable. Legion's death had made her think along those lines, for she had found herself feeling sad that he was gone. She had known him less than a year and yet, she had grieved that he had gone.

He walked up to her and said, "Okay?"

No it wasn't okay, there were three blackheads right on the tip of his nose. But he had worked really hard and Omega was filthy. So she said, "You are looking so good I want your body right now." Which wasn't anywhere near to untrue. She had been unable to make love to him since early January and it was really starting to wear on her. He was, in spite of those blackheads, looking very desirable.

"The feeling is mutual," he replied. "But I miss that sweet little Tali face the most."

The two of them went down to the plaza where breakfast was being served. Being served meaning it was on a heating table in a set of large pots and being half served, half glopped, half spilled, half slopped, and half thrown on what the Mercs or Team Normandy defined as breakfast crockery.

"Navy Oatmeal! Mmmm Mmmm Mmmmm!" suggested John with a touch of sarcasm. "When you get tired of eating it, feed it to the rats and watch them die from the spasms. You can't throw it at the enemy, that's against the Geneva conventions."

"Are you suggesting they actually made it with guddam oats?" groused Zaeed from over at another table.

Tali gratefully took her tube of dextro nutrient paste.

From there it was straight over to Aria's headquarters.

There were actually two headquarters for Aria. The first was the military HQ where Nyreen spent most of her time, usually trying to make sure civilian casualties were kept to a minimum and coordinating Talon missions. Aria would show up for several hours, be briefed on the whole situation by Zaeed, complain that it was taking so long. And after suggesting several plans or actions, frequently would either go out on a mission with Zaeed and Nyreen, or with Zaeen and Nyreen join Team Normandy on some side mission.

The second of course was the makeshift nightclub she put together.

Today however it was different. There was General Oleg Petrovsky, in all his holographic glory, on the com channel.

"Commander Shepherd," he said.

"General Petrovsky," replied John.

"Tell me Commander, you are no doubt aware of the war between the Romans and Epirus where General Pyrrhus commanded?"

"Indeed," answered John.

"Tell me," asked the General. "Who won the battle of Asculum?"

"Most history books suggest it was General Pyrrhus who, upon seeing the casualty report said, 'Another such victory and we are undone.' which has led to the military term Pyrrhic victory. But there are those who suggest that the real winners were the elephants, who had gone berserk and had ravaged both battle lines."

"Precisely," replied General Petrovsky. "The elephants. Or in our case, the Adjutants. They have gotten into the depths of the station where they are raiding and infecting both troops and the civilians with equal impact."

"Then why did you use them you ruthless bastard?" queried Aria.

"As a General, one uses what resources one has at his disposal. I have no problems with Reaper Technology, only Reapers. I used the Adjutants thinking I was using Reaper technology. A part organic part synthetic VI which is perfectly acceptable according to present military ethics. It turns out that I was using Reaper soldiers. And I think we both agree that if Omega ends up entirely infested with Adjutants, no one wins."

"If you think I'm going to ally with you to remove the Adjutants . . ."

"Aria! The civilians are getting infected!" argued Nyreen.

"I have little faith that you will trust me enough for a brief alliance," replied Oleg. "But an Armistice on the other hand, that is a standard military response to a mutual crises threatening both sides of a war. I am proposing one such until midnight of April 1st, so that both sides might work on removing the Adjutants before we both find ourselves trying to survive against them. And I suggest this knowing . . . Aria . . . that I can well afford to lose the entire civilian population of Omega more than you. There are plenty of human refugees out there right now who would only be to glad to occupy an empty station on the ends of settled space. Even one occupied by Cerberus. We are after all, a humanity first organization."

"If you are looking for an Armistice, it means you are worried about the outcome," mused Aria.

"Civilians are being infected!" argued Nyreen.

"We'll take the Armistice," replied John.

"What!" shouted Aria.

"You're an honorable enemy," suggested Petrovsky to John. "I am glad I don't have to directly face you in combat. I might have trouble pulling the trigger and that would kill me."

"The feeling is beginning to be mutual," replied John. "So don't make your funeral arrangements just yet."

"This is totally unacceptable!" began Aria.

Petrovsky winked out.

"Thank you Commander Shepherd," said Nyreen.

"Will someone please explain to me why you accepted his pleas for mercy when it's clear we have him on the run?" cried Aria.

"Because we don't," answered John.

"He'll use this time to build his strength!" she shouted.

"And we won't?" replied John. "Aria this is not palace intrigue where an admission of weakness is a cue for an overthrow by the ambitious. This is a dangerous military threat when directly impacts both of us. Armistices are SOP in serious battlefield conditions. If you stop fighting for an hour to gather the wounded, yes, he gets some of his soldiers back, but so do you. We're still fighting a battle. The game now is to see who clears out their adjutant problem first."

"But he'll get strong," continued Aria.

"And so will we. Nyreen? Given that the adjutants are seriously threatening the population, how many volunteers do you think we'll be able to recruit from the civilian population on both sides of the lines, especially with Talon offering to do the recruitment and arming?"

Nyreen seemed to think for a moment while Aria looked on in stunned silence. It was clear this angle had not presented itself to her.

"A lot," she suggested. "A very large lot in fact."

"There you go," replied John looking at Aria. "We've just possibly won the war, thanks to Petrovsky's mistake of using what he was informed, by Tim no doubt, was merely reaper technology."

"Then why admit it?" asked Aria.

"He has his own honor," replied Nyreen. "I saw it in action before you got back Aria. It's one of the reasons why he's been so successful at keeping us at bay."

John nodded to Nyreen.

"Never underestimate the power of integrity on the battlefield," he added. "If we win this, it won't be Petrovsky that loses it. It will be Tim."


	32. Chapter 32 - Thessia Raped

The 2nd of April was the launching of John's next offensive, and it was, given the state of things, successful. By the time the 2nd had arrived, over 2,500 civilians had volunteered for duty to drive Cerberus out. The hard feelings and anger over the horrible results of the unleashed Adjutants had proven more than catastrophic for Cerberus Public Relations. While more than a few civilians grudgingly admitted that Cerberus did do what it could to keep the infections at a minimum, even forming their own volunteer groups to hunt and kill the creatures during the crises, the fact that Cerberus had been the force that released them, and likewise the fact that humans clearly got preferential treatment by Cerberus guaranteed the enthusiasm of the volunteers. The result was a very successful offensive which had John in complete control of up to 50 of the blocks of Omega. Then Petrovsky, knowing that John was overextended, counter attacked and took back 10 of those blocks. Total losses were 932 for Cerberus and 1,943 for Aria. Most of those were civilian volunteers who had not gotten sufficient training. Even so, John found himself with more troops than Petrovsky for the first time since January.

The Illusive Man responded with a new set of reinforcements bolstering Cerberus strength to 3,500. What happened next was something no one had anticipated. Petrovsky's response was to send a message to Shepherd informing him that he wished to negotiate a peace treaty.

And so on April 12th, John, Tali, Garrus, Aria, Nyreen, and Liara arrived and sat across a table from Oleg Petrovsky.

"I wish to negotiate the surrender of the Cerberus forces," began Petrovsky.

There was a moment of complete surprise by Team Normandy. Aria simply looked at him open mouthed. John and Tali looked at each other, as did Garrus and Liara while Zaeed sort of grumped.

"Given that we only control 40 of the 250 blocks in Omega," began Shepherd. "Why are you offering?"

"I have seen what The Illusive Man has sent as my next batch of reinforcements," answered Oleg. "They were. . . human once. Now they look too much like husks and they have very little in the way of actual humanity left. They just fight, eat, and sleep. They have been . . . their spirit has been killed. I joined Cerberus because I wished to fight for human interests, to keep us free and independent. Like you, Commander Shepherd, I was willing to overlook the dark side because The Illusive Man was determined to stop the Collectors. And then I presumed he was trying to stop the Reapers. But what he sent me might as well be minions of the Reapers, if they don't happen to be already. I can't use these creatures to fight with. I am having trouble not deciding to just quietly shoot them in their sleep and put them out of their misery."

John nodded. "There were a lot of people connected to me that were part of Cerberus when we began our missions against the Collectors," he said. "Nearly all of them left Cerberus. And some of them have paid for that with their lives."

"Which is part of the issue we need to discuss," continued General Petrovsky. "First of all, Aria is not known for her mercy. There's no point in me surrendering if all it's going to get me is death by strangulation. I might as well fight to the death."

John noticed that Aria shifted uncomfortably in her chair.

"Likewise, The Illusive Man won't take my surrender lightly either. Especially if I end up quite alive next to Aria. That will suggest to The Illusive Man that I gave up before I had to and Aria was willing to be . . . merciful. Finally, I joined The Illusive Man to defend humanity. I wish to be able to continue to defend humanity."

John nodded. "We can use all the help we can get in our war against the Reapers," he said. "I think we will need to discuss the matter between ourselves before we proceed to the next step. I propose an armistice between now and a meeting tomorrow at this site. I think both sides would like to spend a day not worrying about someone they care for getting shot dead."

This was agreeable to Petrovsky and the team retired to their own HQ to discuss it.

"Well Aria, you have a choice," began Shepherd. "Omega back now with your popularity at an all time high, thanks to the Adjutant crises, or we can continue to fight and with luck, you might, in a few more months, get Petrovsky's head on a plate."

It was clear that Aria was torn. She began to pace. Nyreen just watched her. Garrus and Liara were just seated, waiting. Tali however was clearly fidgeting. John had his own suspicions what Tali was thinking. She wanted out of Omega. She wanted to be back on the 'clean' relatively speaking, Normandy. He did to. Which was why he suspected he knew. But unlike her, he was Commander Shepherd. He was not allowed to fidget publicly. Once they would be safe in their own room, he would be able to unleash. And with luck, she would only have to punch him once to remind him not to take it out on her.

"Oh it was real easy imagining being an all out bitch," began Aria. "Seeing this bastard who had taken Omega from me suffering before I took him out. Reminding people that Omega belongs to me." Aria paused.

"It's clear however, that the bastard has got the better of the situation. He's good. He's not just ruthless, he's not just cold, he's good. Good at what he does. We have been just as good so far, but sooner or later there's still a very good chance he's going to come up with something which throws us back out. No matter what we do, we always take more hits than he does and he always knows how to blunt it. And each time we pull some new trick, he gets a better grip on our style and skills. I may hate the bastard. I may want him dead. But he's right. It's only because he beat me. And I haven't survived this long by flirting with Ardat-Yakshe."

She continued to pace for a moment.

"What do you plan on offering him?" she asked Shepherd. "At this point I doubt I'll have a problem with your terms."

"I'm going to talk with Admiral Hackett first," answered John. "I'll be transferring the team back to the Normandy for the time being."

"Oh? We're going back to the Normandy?" queried Liara. "How sad, just as I was getting to be friends with all the spiders in our apartment."

Tali suddenly stood up and began to franticly look around. John sighed and shook his head.

"Oh?" answered Aria to Liara. "So you noticed. Some human ship was infested with some sort of bug, called them cockroaches, they escaped that ship and began to infest Omega and the Vorcha couldn't eat them fast enough. They were getting into everything. So I imported some North American furry spider called a Housekeeper. They keep the cockroaches at bay nicely. Take some getting used to. You never know when one will show up inside your favorite jacket's sleeve. They don't seem to like biting people but they do crawl very fast over your skin and it tickles."

"Yes," answered Liara. "They're about the size of my hand and we found one of them between our bedsheets one evening and the other in my underwear drawer. Or maybe it was the same one. He was a fast little bugger."

John sighed some more as he noticed Tali's increased agitation.

"They have to be," sighed Aria. "The Vorcha like them even better than they like the cockroaches."

"Yes," John concluded. "We'll be transferring to the Normandy for the time being. And I'll run scans on all the luggage so something doesn't follow us onboard."

Tali in the meantime, had her shotgun out and was busy looking at all the corners, ready to shoot.

Within an hour, the Normandy had docked. Within an hour and twelve seconds, Tali was on board. John got to pack. And sure enough, he actually found a small housekeeper, no bigger than his thumbnail, in the corner by the chest of drawers.

"You are one lucky fellow," he said to the spider. "My wife has a shot gun for the likes of you."

The housekeeper, it's senses informing it that Shepherd was not a threat, simply remained at 'rest' waiting for something edible to show up.

So an hour later. John arrived with the luggage. Tali had her omni-tool at full scan mode and her shotgun by her side.

"It's okay Tali," John assured her. "I ran a check before I took everything out. The Normandy's scans checked when I brought the stuff in, and so everything should be safe.

"Yahn? Please unpack?"

"Okay Kitten."

And he did, each item carefully and cautiously. He knew she was more than likely to overreact if a spider took her by surprise. It had to be the longest time he had ever spent unpacking. And when it was done. Tali got up, removed her mask, and gave him a long and lingering kiss. He took a second afterwards to look into her eyes, before, oh so soon, she put her mask back on.

"Not long now," she whispered. "We're back on the Normandy."

"Not for sure," answered John. "But I'm hoping."

And, with all their stuff unpacked and back in the cabin, and proven spider free, John retired to the communications chamber to confer with Admiral Hackett.

Tali spent a moment resetting her omni-tool app for re-integration with the Normandy. She was pleasantly surprised that she would have a full two hours out of her mask in the evening. Such had been the genius of Mordin that he had even anticipated prolonged absences from their home. She took a moment to miss him. Then she began to arrange their cabin. She recalled the sleeping pods she had slept in on the first Normandy all those months. The first Normandy's Captain's Cabin has been smaller than this one. But it had been more impenetrable than this one ever had been. For by the time she had boarded this Normandy, they had already recommitted. Or rather, she had recommitted to him. He never had fallen out of love with her. He hadn't been given the time to. She took Boo out of his aquarium and petted him for a moment. She found the hamster an odd creature. But again, there had been nothing of this sort on the Migrant Fleet. No animals at all. Animals used up oxygen. Animals ate food. Plants had given the fleet oxygen back. She noted that there was food residue on the tank bottom so she knew Traynor had kept the fish fed. She went back to the bed and sat down on 'her' side of it. There was the little cabinet with the light on it. The drawers were empty of course. She only had a few articles of clothing, her tools, and her hairbrush. Even now, married for over a year, her property was still slight. But there was on thing different. She had one treasured possession. She lifted up her left hand. Underneath her glove was that silver 'wedding' ring that he had gotten for her right after the Battle of the Citadel. The one she had never taken off. The one thing that had brought back the memories of that brief happy time before she had left for the fleet with her gift.

She walked over to her desk and put her repair tools down on it and then walked over to his desk and put her photo in it's usual spot. Her on Rannoch. There was another surreal moment for her. It wasn't the migrant fleet any more. It was her home-planet. Someday it would be her home. But not yet. Not yet. The Normandy was her home. For that was where her Yahn was. She looked around again. Everything was in place. John's little doc kit with his toiletries was in the bathroom. She could of course use the shower if she wished, or the toilet. But her suit so well took care of those things, it seemed a waste to take what resources others did need because they didn't have a suit. It bothered her Yahn when she relieved herself in her suit. Sometimes there was some noises of escaping gasses and a slight smell. She didn't really see what the fuss was all about. She wasn't doing anything any Quarian would regard as odd. Of course there was that time in the apartment when she was in her nightgown and forgot she wasn't in her suit. He was very annoyed over that. But expressed thanks that she hadn't been on the bed when it happened. He had helped clean it up. There had been some remark or other with a word usage she was unfamiliar with, specifically that he had a Quarian wife who was not 'housebroken'. Of course she had been horribly embarrassed over it. But she had gotten the impression that as far as her Yahn was concerned, not embarrassed enough. But had her Yahn been there and capable of reading her mind, he would have noticed that not once when she was recollecting such moments of acute embarrassment, she never stopped to think, "A Quarian Bond-mate would have never had this problem with me." It never even dawned on her to think it.

The room was as arranged as it could be. She headed down to engineering.

"Oh thank heavens you are here, Tali!" cried Gabby. "This place is going to pieces without you! We have had two breaks in the lines, an overflow of energy along the main circuit boards, the life support filters are being overloaded by something we can't figure out, and Ken can't keep his hands off me the moment Adams turns his back."

"Is the last problem actually a problem?" queried Tali grinning under her mask.

"When there's nothing I can do about it? You bet!"

"Ah," observed Tali. She mentally reminded herself that humans did not have the 'wait until the suit acclimates or someone would die' issues which required you to get your body and mind into gear. As a result, human romance was often a bit of an irresponsible thing which frequently led to so much irritation when someone ended up pregnant. She found it rather odd that humans would be surprised when that natural consequence actually occurred. That some of them apparently would be in shock when they found out that their child producing behaviors had actually produced children. Gabby had already perceived that it had happened twice to her, the first time Kenneth had utterly freaked out Both times were, as Gabby put it, 'false alarms'. But again, Tali found it odd that pregnancy was regarded as something alarming.

"I'll never know what it's like," she sighed to herself. "I picked a human for my bond-mate."

She was sad about that, but again, the mind reader would not have seen even the slightest hint of 'I wish I had bonded with a nice Quarian boy' flit through.

She spent the next hour helping Adams, Gabby, and Ken get engineering issues worked out.

"We're not used to you being absent for weeks at a time on missions," sighed Adams. "So we've been having to spend a great deal of time asking 'What would Tali do?' when we have an issue."

"I couldn't have been that important," joked Tali, secretly happy that she had been so missed. "I mean the Normandy is still running."

"Only because we've kept explosions down to manageable levels," suggested Gabby.

"Well," concluded Tali. "I'm back. And we're back to quick missions I hope. So I'll be working here daily. But really, you all did a very good yob without me."

The other three engineers smiled. It was nice to be complimented on your work.

The next two hours passed quickly enough as Tali began working out solutions to the problems which were popping up. And then John showed up in Engineering.

"I've finished talking with Admiral Hackett," he said.

"That was a long one," observed Tali checking her Omni-tool.

"General Petrovsky has presented us with a unique opportunity. We wanted to make sure we cashed in on it, while likewise respecting his person."

"Will he take the terms you've decided to offer?" asked Tali.

"If I knew he would," sighed John. "I would say so. But I don't know Tali, so I can't tell you. But anyway, let's enjoy our night on the Normandy."

And that night, that is what they did. After supper, they retired to their cabin. John worked on a new ship model. Tali fiddled with some circuit boards which she could safely experiment with for next day's engineering work. Then John turned on his piano and they played a couple of pieces together. And then Tali removed her mask and gloves and they lay together, kissed, cuddled, and talked until they fell asleep. And next morning, they were back in Omega and ready to confer with General Oleg Petrovsky. The negotiations were pretty quick since John and Hackett had both agreed that the terms needed to be generous given what they wanted. The net result was that almost all of the Cerberus troops marched out under Petrovsky's command and proceeded to join the Alliance to fight the reapers, which was what most of them had joined Cerberus thinking they were going to be doing anyway. The rest were marched to a drop off point with the understanding that Cerberus would pick them up under a flag of truce.

Aria strode into her traditional nightclub, Afterlife, and basked in the adulation of the people. She was true to her word. Zaeed was given full command of the three mercenary regiments and was sent to the war effort. Nyreen remained in control of the Talons and they took upon themselves the job of security. They would, as a means of maintaining their presence, charge a slight 'tax' on the population, which would be collected at regular intervals. Nyreen, decided to keep it cheap but routine so that it would be less intrusive. "They have to eat," she reasoned. "And if it's twenty-five credits each month, as opposed to 600 at the end of the year it won't seem so expensive or debilitating to the monthly budget."

Liara ran the numbers and estimated that that if the Talons could collected it equitably and fairly, they would be able to live sufficiently well to give Nyreen justification to hang any one of them who returned to a life of crime. Of course Aria fully intended to allow the criminal element to return to Omega and employ the station as a base for it's nefarious deeds but Nyreen was going to see to it that the Talons remained untouchables. The focus of the Talons was the result of a long argument between Aria and Nyreen. The rules were simple. You didn't fuck with Aria, and you didn't fuck with the civilians. Everything else was open season, with no limit, but nothing was suggested that the targets would taste like chicken. After the very prolonged and animated 'discussion' Aria accused Nyreen of sleeping with Archangel and his influence rubbing off on her, and Nyreen coyly replied that it had been ages since she had done that.

With a certain level of security now on Omega. John was fairly certain that things would be just a little bit better for the common man there. The increased security enabled the Alliance to make Omega a stopping point for refueling and other supplies. And as the war went on, Omega's fast and loose approach to acquisition proved valuable since just about anything could be gotten there, an attribute which enabled more than one Reaper ravaged frigate to get back into the fight. In addition, Omega gained a reputation for being the ideal shore leave for crews who had fought hard and worked hard. The place lent itself to letting off a lot of hard steam. Things were a bit harder for the humans there afterwards, until time had erased the uglier memories of Cerberus occupation. But in the end, Omega proved to be what it always had been in living memory, a station where anything could be bought or sold or smuggled somewhere illegal.

And so on the 15th of April, the Normandy, refueled and provisioned, left Omega and set off for new assignments. For the next few months, life on the Normandy began to approach a semblance of normalcy for Tali. She rapidly acclimated to the cabin, and in two weeks she and John were once again able to make love. They worked very hard at that to make up for lost time. But eventually, they found out that they liked talking once in a while instead. There were still missions, every one to two weeks, some thing needed to be slipped into Earth, important persons needed to be rescued from a colony under siege, and on occasion some artifact sacred to this species or that race was secured and brought to a place more safe.

At the same time, new grounds for hope began to open up. As the Rachni lived underground and derived much of their needs from below the surface, their homes made ideal havens for refugees and secure bases. Likewise they could burrow and live where no one else could. Once a team of Salarian scientists were able to modify Mordin's inoculation serum for the Rachni, the queens were inoculated. That effectively cut off any further chances that the Reapers would be able to indoctrinate the Rachni, and that enabled the Rachni to quickly set up underground bases with which to carry on the persistent guerrilla operations against the Reapers on the Human and Turian planets. The Reapers were out of their element enough in the wilderness, but they had no means of dealing with underground bunkers. They were too big to crawl down into them, and while they had more than a few million troops to try to crawl down there themselves, narrow passages always have lent themselves to defense and such bunkers proved to be a slaughter house for Reaper forces. The usual Reaper strategy was to blow the entire area into rubble, producing thousands of cave ins and collapses. But when you're entire life is spent digging tunnels and living in them, cave ins are merely another engineering problem, and one of the more easily dealt with. And if the tunnels are deep enough and reinforced enough, you can't pound the sand hard enough to get to them. Slowly, little by little, bit by bit, the Turian and Human colonies were turned into underground bunkers which ran deep. Tali eventually found an irony in the matter. Humans who hated Quarians called them Suit-rats. But the veterans of these bunkers proudly called themselves, to the day of their death, Tunnel-rats. Tali was left with the impression that the rat was a very contradictory animal.

It was after one such smuggling mission, in which the Normandy had transported another fifty Rachni engineers into England to assist in the building of a mile underground command center for Anderson that John found Javik musing while watching the Rachni singing to Anderson while he was watching his omni-tool for the translation and trying, somewhat clumsily, to sing back. He had a nice African baritone, that smooth whiskey quality which made your toes tingle when done right, but he was being spontaneous and only professional singers can sound good spontaneously.

"In my cycle," recollected Javik. "We were only just beginning to discover the power that the earth had over the Reapers. If we had been given more time, we would have done this as well and perhaps might have won."

"In your cycle," answered John. "Your high command was destroyed by the Reapers at the very beginning of the harvest. Ours was not. So it's very likely that some Protheans discovered the advantages of underground works very early on, but you could not communicate with each other. We did not lose our central command structure. So the Rachni's innovations are already galaxy wide and this war is not yet a year old."

"Why this cycle and not ours? Why do you have the hope that we never had?"'

"It was explained to me in that place you say doesn't exist," answered John with a slight smile.

"Ah," replied Javik. "I have no need for dream explanations."

"You wouldn't like the answer anyway," replied John.

John and Tali referred to this time as their Smuggling Spring. But in mid July, John was irritable and depressed. It wasn't until Tali remembered human attachments to anniversaries and dates that she was able to figure it out. It had been on 17th of July that the Reapers had attacked Earth. And that war was now a year old. And then, on the 24th of July, just as John was getting back into a good mood, the Reapers slammed through the borders of Asari space and landed on Thessia. The United Species were convinced that the Reapers had more than enough on their plate with the Reapers trying to subdue and harvest the Humans and Turians. They thought that the Reapers could not pose that serious a threat to the Asari. The Asari thought they were ready. They thought wrong.

Three days later, the Asari High Command contacted Shepherd. It was the first time they had done so in all his years as a Specter. So there was a bit of 'it's about time' going on in his head. But then again, he had found reasons to be annoyed with just about every species in the galaxy for some reason or another, and so he simply did what he did when another Batarian, Elcor, Hanar, Human, Quarian, Turian, or Volus annoyed him. He poker faced his way through it.

"Commander Shepherd," she began. "I understand you helped resolve the situation with the Geth."

It was an odd way to start a conversation, he thought. That had nearly been a year ago at this point.

"Yes Councilor," he began. "Two in fact."

"I've read your reports. You ended a war three centuries in the making."

"I had a lot of help," he answered. In the flash of a second, one of those moments almost out of time, the faces of Tali, Garrus, Liara, and the rest of the team flitted through his head. He even briefly thought of the crucifix hanging over his bed. Then he grieved over Legion. There was a curious surreal quality to it. A three centuries old conflict had been ended and the two races were discovering how much they really depended upon each other.

"We have isolated pockets of remaining Geth," she continued. "As best we can tell, they are Geth bodies loaded with Reaper Code . . ."

"So the Reapers were even indoctrinating the Geth," reflected John's thoughts. "Worse, they were possessing them entirely. So much for this being a synthesis verses organic conflict. This is a Reaper verses everyone else fight." That Reaper on Rannoch, even while dying, had been lying to him.

". . . But they are just a tiny fragment of the full Geth Fleet," she continued. "You've done the impossible Commander. And I may be able to provide help on my own."

"How nice of her," thought John. He found her laid back and non-threatening posture rather amusing given that finally now, after all this time, the Asari leadership was going actually start cooperating with the entire united species effort. Apparently the Asari had seen the Turians humble themselves before the humans once Palavan was being raped, and concluded that it would not apply to them. He mentally shook his head that even now, the races were still in some form of denial until the Reapers came smashing into their own worlds.

"I've received information from my government," she continued. "It's too sensitive to discuss over an unsecured channel."

"What if I come to the citadel?" he asked.

"Yes," she answered. "That would be best. I'll be waiting for you in former councilor Udina's office."

That evening, when he walked into their cabin, Tali was already in, her hair brushed, happily looking over his half finished ship model.

"Hi Yahn," she half sang as he came in.

"How's my favorite Quarian Engineer?" he asked.

She pursed her lips and pretended to think. It was such a routine comment these days that he suspected she was making a joke out of that.

"I can't think of any reason why the answer wouldn't be 'fine'," she answered.

"Oh good," he replied. "I was worried there. We're off to the citadel again."

"Will we be able to stay in the apartment?" she asked. She looked at him with a suggestion of hopefulness in her face. He didn't blame her. They had some happy memories associated with that apartment.

"As far as I can tell," continued John. "It's going to be just a brief meeting and we'll be leaving as soon as we refuel and restock, which won't take more than a day."

"Yahn? I don't care if I have to stay in my suit the whole time. I loved being with you in that apartment. We had so much fun there. So many nice memories. We could put up the Christmas tree even."

"Tali," sighed John. "It's July. You don't put up Christmas trees in July."

"Oh!" she said, somewhat surprised. "That must be why they call them Christmas trees."

"Yes," he replied, struggling not to make a snarky comment. She was after all, Quarian and not human. You couldn't expect her to understand something which had nothing to do with her culture.

"But we can have a fire in the fireplace, sit on the couch, watch Fleet and Flotilla, and I can take off my mask and kiss you at the right time."

John sighed and hoped she read that as a 'Ah how sweet and romantic' sigh and not a "Please God not Fleet and Flotilla again' sigh.

Her expression was suggesting she was suspecting the latter so he thought fast.

"I will love to watch it with you," he said, meaning that he would will himself to express his love for her by watching that chick flick yet again with her.

That seemed to satisfy her since of course she did not understand all the nuances of English.

"You understand of course," he continued. "That I'm going to miss the fact that I won't be able to see your face the whole time and kiss you when I want to."

"Oh that's right," she said with just the hint of sexy tease in her tone. "I'm going to have to do something about that."

She stood up and removed her poncho and necklace. Then she gently pulled him to the bed and proceeded to add, what she referred to as 'padding' for future absences.

Three days later they pulled into the Citadel. Refuel and provisioning would be two days. So Tali happily packed the duffle bags for a brief stay in the Apartment while John headed off to Udina's old office. As much as he had found Udina annoying, his death had left a bad taste in the mouth. John hated it when people he feared would face judgement after death died, especially suddenly.

The room was filled with Asari, Specter, and C-sec officials who were going through the office with a fine tooth comb, or more literally very full body cavity search quality omni-tools. It was curious that even after all this time, they were still sifting through the data. But then again, there was an awful lot of data and no doubt, more than enough to convict the entire human parliament of all sorts of human dirty deeds done dirt cheap. Not that he objected in the slightest. Politicians had been the main reason why he had failed to rally the galaxy to the threat of the Reapers. Politicians had thrown him into prison for six months, the last six months of peace. The thought of other politicians making his politicians squirm a bit was something which he thought only just.

"Commander Shepherd," The Asari Councilor began as he walked in. "Thank you for coming."

"Did you find something?" he asked, as he watched all the high level forces going over every square inch of the office with their omni-tools.

"The Council has ordered a full review over Donald Udina's activities," she began. He didn't really care that she was trying to hide behind a decision she herself was instrumental in implementing. Once again he found the curious justifications that politicians came up with amusing. "We're still piecing together his coup attempt. But that isn't why I asked you here."

"Of course," he thought.

"The situation is growing urgent for my people," she whispered. "We are aware your crucible is missing a key component."

"The catalyst," he whispered back. "Do you know something?"

"Not exactly," she replied quietly as they retired to a more isolated corner of the office. "But there is an artifact on our home world Thessia. Known only to our highest levels of our government."

Part of him wanted at this juncture to smack her silly across the face for not revealing this information sooner. But better late than never, and better just in the nick of time than too late. Again, it did no good, however cathartic it might feel, to take out frustrations on those with the power, even when they desperately deserved it.

So he didn't say, "What is it that you stupid trampy bitches have been keeping from us which might win this war without my and Garrus's home worlds being entirely gang-raped?"

He merely said, "What is it?"

"With any luck," she said. "It's a means to help you locate the catalyst. The artifact is kept in a temple located at these coordinates. I've ordered a scientific team to meet you there."

And he didn't say, "And so you sluts, stuck with Reapers sticking sandpaper sticks up your stinking blue posteriors suddenly decide that some damn thing utterly crucial to the success of this entire war of which you have sat on for the last year, even though you knew we needed it, are suddenly willing to hand it over? Well thank you ever so much for your sudden need to cooperate saving the galaxy, since now it has actually dawned on you morons that you're part of self-said galaxy."

What he actually said was, "So if this artifact is so important, why keep it hidden?" which was a very polite way to gently suggest that they had not been doing nice with the rest of the galaxy while sounding as if he was merely suggesting that perhaps she was placing to much emphasis on it. After all, if you need the glorious dingus to save life, liberty, and the universe as we know it, you produce the glorious dingus for the hero to use pronto.

"Every species in the Citadel has it's secrets Commander," she began. Which John immediately recognized as merely your classic adolescent "everyone else is doing it" argument. He suppressed the urge to sound like his mother with the comeback "if every species in the citadel were jumping naked out of airlocks would you do it too?" He had hated it when his mother would say that when he was a teenager because he had no answer to it. And of course he had no answer to it because she was entirely right as to the actual intellectual value of that argument.

"But this one, in the wrong hands, would upset the balance of galactic power," she continued. He immediately recognized that it was just a restatement of "knowledge is power and we intend to keep it."

"The Reapers are doing that right now," he observed, as politely as he could given that he was being given oh so typical political BS.

"Which is why I'm bringing this to you," she responded.

John's response was to mentally note this was a grudging admission of guilt while at the same time trying to refrain from admitting that she had done anything she ought to feel guilty about. "I get this from my wife on a routine basis," he thought. "I wonder if this is just a girl thing?" he continued to think. Then he missed Tali and wished he could kiss her, which was a really silly thing to be thinking about because she was only fifteen minutes drive in the apartment in Silversun no doubt warming up the Fleet and Flotilla snack foods which reminded him he was going to have to watch that chick flick again and he HATED that . . .

"I appreciate the help," he remembered to say to the Asari Councilor in the middle of these mental gymnastics.

"It's you who will be helping us," she answered. John noted that somehow, Asari always seemed to express gratitude in such a manner that implied a possibility of sleeping with them. "Matriarchs are growing desperate. For the first time in our history, Thessia is vulnerable. For all our intellect, we are outmatched by Reaper firepower." she continued.

"I'll do what I can," he answered.

"Whether you know it or not, you have become the sole ray of hope in a very dark night," she continued. "Goddess be with you."

He nodded an acknowledgement, thanked God that no one could read his mind at times like this, and proceeded to the apartment where he discovered, much to his surprise, that according to Tali's omni-tool she had so acclimated to the apartment during their three month plus stay she could be out of her suit all evening. She had put on her sandals, baggy blue jeans, and her red poncho with a nice gold chain around the shoulders. So at the appropriate time in the Fleet and Flotilla vid, instead of removing her mask, Tali chose to remove other articles as a substitute. The author does not feel he needs to explain how this little gesture on Tali's part played out though John did conclude that perhaps maybe watching Fleet and Flotilla wasn't such a bad thing after all.

The next day they packed up and got their respective luggage back to the Normandy since John intended to pull out the second the Normandy was fully restocked. In addition, the Normandy would have a new resident, the reporter Diana Allers who intended to cover the news from the Normandy as a means of broadcasting victories and bucking up the moral of the United Species.

Before she and John left, Tali walked through the apartment one last time and heaved a big sigh. Then she put the duffle bag with their stuff on one of John's shoulders, then put herself on the other, and they returned to the Normandy. She was sad for a few moments in Engineering, but then Ken started shouting at the console and by the time she and Ken had figured out what the problem was and how to fix it, she was back to being happy about being on the Normandy.

The trip to Thessia was without incident, the first part of the trip was simply because they were still in friendly space. The second part because they were in stealth. But as they closed in on Thessia. Joker's and EDI's analysis of the planet informed them that the entire planet was under heavy Reaper attack. The war had come to Thessia. Liara, already knowing the reports was practically in tears. Once upon a time, it has been a point of pride with her that the Asari were so secure in their intellectual and military prowess that their planets did not need defensive works. "We, are the walls of Thessia," she once proclaimed in a 'who's got more moxie' debate with Garrus.

"What about the Temple?" asked Shepherd as he came up to the bridge with Liara, half walking half running behind him. "Can you raise the scientists?"

"Negative," answered Joker. "All channels are scrambled across the spectrum. The mission is looking really dicey."

"Shepherd!" Liara couldn't keep quiet any more. "That's my home down there! We have to go!"

"Wrex did complain back on the Citadel that back in the good old days you had at least five minutes before a mission went south," recollected EDI. "It seems now that they go south before we even begin them."

"Liara, you are correct," replied John. "This mission is way to important to delay. We got to get in there now or never."

And with that they proceeded to the shuttle. Cortez was waiting for them.

"Looks like another run through the guns," he observed. "One thing for certain, there's never a school bus drive for this crew."

They got into the shuttle and the Normandy let them out in the upper atmosphere. The ride in was bumpy enough, but Garrus was just holding Liara and saying over and over again. "I'm so sorry girl, it'll be alright. Shepherd and I both know what you're going through."

Tali leaned on John. While Kaiden, seeming to get nostalgic, turned to James.

"So how's our little Myra these days. Is prison life helping her work through her issues?"

"Don't know yet," replied James. "Papa always told me visiting the criminals in prison was a good thing to do. It helped them sometimes. So he would do it every Sunday afternoon after Mass and Dinner. But Myra was the first person I knew well enough to feel comfortable visiting. So, it wasn't for those kinds of feelings when it started. If that's what you're hinting at."

Kaiden shrugged. "Well I guess I did presume since you had said she was cute."

"She was," agreed James. "Before she revealed that she was hooked up with the clone. After that, she wasn't so pretty."

Kaiden seemed to muse on that for a moment. "Yeah," he said. "That does take the twinkle out of the eyes doesn't it."

"But now," continued James. "I'm beginning to think she might have feelings. She told me a couple days ago, at our last visit, that I'm the only person visiting her."

"Really?"

"Could be," answered James. "But you know how women are. If you're the only one, it doesn't always mean that you're the only one, it may mean you're the only one who counts."

"What do you think?"

"She is starting to look pretty again," answered James. "And that's in prison fatigues with no makeup or hairdo. So we'll see. I mean it's not that I've got any other prospects right now. And nobody's perfect. At least in this life. So how about you?" he continued turning more to Kaiden.

"Got an old high school classmate who has decided that a Specter who's fighting the Reapers isn't such a looser after all. She started writing to me when she heard I was a Specter. I've been polite, but I keep it casual. She was always the sort who went for the big guys on campus when we were growing up, so I figured, of course I'm interesting now, I'm a Specter. But then she started talking about all the people in her life who are now dead. And I've detected a bit of maturity in her so maybe, she won't be a bad match either. She was very pretty, always knew how to have the best make up and hairstyle in the class."

"You have a picture of her?"

"Not yet," answered Kaiden. "Like I said, I'm keeping it casual for now, waiting to see how serious she's going to be with this.

Cortez, now able to link up with Asari troops on the ground near the landing zone, started broadcasting video from the sight. Everyone got to see the Reapers striding across the city, methodically pounding all opposition. Liara kept looking at the video.

"Liara?" asked John, thinking to distract her from the horror of seeing her home world being so brutally sacked. "Do you have any more information on this artifact?"

"These coordinates which the councilor gave you, are for the Temple of Athane," answered Liara quietly and softly. "My mother took me there once. It's several thousand years old. And for some reason, it has classified government funding."

"Sounds like we're on the right trail," guessed John.

"What if we're too late?" sighed Liara. "My people are dying down there."

John and Garrus seemed to give each other a 'join the club' glance, but John immediately regretted it. It wasn't Liara's fault that the Asari government had been so stubborn about the approaching doomsday. In fact Liara had been one of the few Asari who had believed in the Reaper threat from the beginning. She, knowing her mother, knew that it would have taken something catastrophically powerful to be able to totally subsume her. But now that they understood Reaper indoctrination, Liara had come to peace with her mother's 'fall' and death.

"Your empathy is a weakness," complained Javik turning to Liara. "You must inure yourself to loss." It was one of those 'gee I wish we could smack the Prothean silly' moments in John's psyche. Liara seemed to look at Javik with a 'I understand you are trying to help based on your whole life being of one continuous defeat'.

"Benezia took you to this temple?" asked John trying to change the subject.

"I was just a child," she answered. "I thought it was a history lesson but now? Maybe there was more to it."

"What do you mean?" asked John.

Liara called up an image and data on her omni-tool.

"I went digging through her old files," answered Liara. "She had heavily encrypted records on this place . . ."

The shuttle rattled a bit from a nearby explosion. Everyone was briefly reminded that they were flying into a first class hot zone battle. Omega may have been a dress rehearsal for this, but Cerberus had always lacked the firepower that the Reapers had access to.

". . . some dating back centuries," continued Liara. "I still can't crack most of them. What ever is going on, it's well hidden."

"I've studied your old mission reports," added Javik. "Your mother was indoctrinated." He said it with all the panache and style of an adolescent gang member boast.

"Yes," replied Liara who was too much in a state of shock to respond in a negative fashion. "We had to kill her."

"Yet it did not stop you from fighting," continued Javik. "As I said, steel yourself. Many more lives will be lost."

"We can't ignore that people are dying," argued Garrus, coming to Liara's defense. "The Reapers may not know mercy, but we do."

"It is their indifference that gives them power," argued Javik.

The shuttle once again rattled.

"You can tell that to the kings of Assyria," answered John. "They were not afraid to inflict horrible pain and suffering on their victims as well. They too had indifference. But one day, there were just too many victims fighting back for them to be able to respond. And their great capitol city Nineveh was pounded into dust. A city which, up to that point, had been thousands of years old. The dust has long settled, but Nineveh is no longer there. I intend to show them another way. And if they don't learn, they too will be pounded into dust."

When the shuttle doors opened, it was a scene from hell. Fire and smoke were everywhere and the sounds of battle were the only sound they heard. John was reminded briefly of a famous photo of from the battle of Stalingrad which had been taken across the Volga river. The entire city had been wreathed in smoke which rose into the sky in thick columns. One of the most famous shots of the battles from the 20th century. This wasn't as bad, but then again, Stalingrad didn't have black ugly bugs, twenty stories tall, striding among the ruins tearing things apart.

"Back on the clock," half joked Kaiden leaping down. "Where do we punch in the time card?"

"Just hold it up and let the Reaper bullets do the work," replied James joining him.

"This can't be happening," cried Liara. "My home."

"There's no time for mourning," snapped Javik. "We're exposed up here."

The team rapidly dashed down a hillside and reached a squad of Asari holding a gap between two buildings with biotics and cover.

"You must be Commander Shepherd," cried one of the Asari. Her demeanor suggested she was a commanding officer. "I'm Lieutenant Kurin!"

That was all the time they had for pleasantries for the first wave of Reaper forces came crashing through the debris at them. The team was on the front lines and spent the next few moments fighting. Javik found himself a field machine gun and John swore he was happily firing it into the advancing waves of black Reaper foot soldiers. James and Kaiden found a shoulder of concrete which gave them plenty of cover to simply cover the approach with assault rifle fire while EDI popped up and let loose with her executioner's pistol, always scoring a direct hit before popping down and replacing her spent thermal plug. She could do this very quickly. Liara quickly pulled out her omni-tool periscope and began scanning the back areas for the more powerful Reaper forces which Garrus would, in a single smooth motion rise up, take out with a single sniper shot to the head, and then drop back down. John was to the right of James adding to the assault rifle fire while Tali would pop up and use her shot gun for anything that got too close to her Yahn while her engineering drone buzzed about behind the advancing wave of Reaper soldiers scoring minor, but very effective, hits on their flanks and heads.

"I miss scary Krogan," shouted Tali at one moment.

"That means you owe Garrus fifty credits," shouted John back.

"Oh that's right I'm such a Bosh'tet," groaned Tali back.

There were a total of four waves of Reaper troops, each wave a platoon in strength before a lull in the attack enable them to inquire just what was going on and how they were going to get to the temple, now clearly on, if not behind, the battle lines. As John glanced around for Lieutenant Kurin, he could see the looks of gratitude in the faces of the ordinary Asari soldiers.

"We were told to expect you," Kurin said as he came up. "My orders are to hold this bridge at all costs. But my perimeter's collapsing and I have no choice but to get my people out of here."

"This is important," began Shepherd. "And we need your help."

"Well unless you can give me a good reason to stay, I'm not going to let my soldiers die in order to hold a field of rubble."

"What exactly were you told about?" began John. He inwardly cursed the political class yet again. It was obsessions with secrets like this which lost battles.

"Nothing but your name. Mission details were classified," she answered. "Which means we'll just die without knowing why."

"I know what's that like," argued John. "But you have to trust the chain of command."

"We're not even sure the chain still exists," she retorted. "So what are we doing here?"

"We're after a relic inside the temple," John answered. "It's important."

"That's what this is all about?" she asked. She obviously was not particularly impressed. "One of our outposts have been trying to reach the scientists over there," she continued. "But we've lost contact." She turned to Shepherd. "I'm sorry commander. But if your relic has lasted this long it can last a little bit longer. I've lost enough people today."'

Then Javik walked up to her and grasped her. John did not hear what it was exactly he said to her. But he caught the words warrior and exhaustion. In some fashion, Javik was encouraging her. It was that first glimpse of empathy which had been so absent from him so far.

"Find your resolve," he finished. "This war can end if you do."

John walked up and decided it was time to let her know the big picture.

"We're building a Prothean super-weapon. One which will win this war," he said.

Lieutenant Kurin had heard what she needed to hear. From Javik, she had gotten the determination to fight through to the completion of the objective, and from John, she had heard that in so doing, the war could be won. She snapped orders to what was left of her forces and began to coordinate for the push to the temple.

"Let's make sure the galaxy knows that the war was won on Thessia!" she concluded.

With their six firmly established, John and his team pushed ahead.

"I was here years ago," sighed Liara. "To see the city burning like this . . ."

"It can be rebuilt," replied John. "Just worry about the next twenty meters."

They crossed the bridge while Asari gunships overhead provided cover for them. Explosions rattled the bridge and the air around them.

"This has to end!" cried Liara.

Javik shouted more encouragement and then the next wave of Reaper troops came at them. Everyone got into cover, for once again, the terrain was more than adequate for the team to set up a line of fire and use their firepower to wear down and drive back the wave after wave of black ugly creatures which crawled, gamboled, leapt, and charged at them.

As Tali fired off blast after blast of her shotgun, she began to wonder at that curious feeling of satisfaction that she was experiencing as these things were being methodically destroyed. Now that she understood the Geth, she regretted the one's she had killed in her life. Yet she had a hard time imagining she would ever feel this way about the creatures she was destroying now. She wondered if they even felt pain, if they were even alive. Or was there a tortured soul in there, twisted into something it had never been meant to be. Or perhaps like the Adjutants, they were just a synthesis of organic and synthetic matter, being run by a type of Reaper intelligence. In the end, she suspected she might never know the where they had come from, but she knew the why, and for that reason, they had to be destroyed. She remained satisfied, particularly when she recalled that she had never seen one of them try to surrender. They simply attacked until they were killed. It made it so much easier to empty her gun at them.

The entire firefight was a horrible emotional experience for Liara. Yet every time she began to despair. Javik would encourage her. There seemed now to be a link between him and the entire Asari race. But with Liara in particular.

"My own people," she moaned looking at a dying banshee crumble into dust.

"The Reapers turned our own children against us," recalled Javik. "They knew we would hesitate to kill them."

"Did you?" asked Liara.

"What answer would you prefer?" replied Javik.

"None," she said.

"We didn't need Reapers," recalled John in his thoughts. "Our own do that just as well."

When they reached the next outpost, there was only one Asari soldier left. There was no contact with the scientists that had been inside the temple. Not that there was much chance they had ever survived given the persistent Reaper pounding of the city. John had to once again persuade the local Asari forces for one last effort, and once that was achieved, they charged into the temple.

And found it curiously deserted.


	33. Chapter 33 - Illusive Bullseye

The temple was large and vast. And at the center was a massive statue of what the Asari pictured The Goddess to be. She stood larger than life, divine, regal, yet curiously aloof. The team began to quietly explore the temple, almost oblivious to the sounds of death and carnage and war beyond the walls.

"Hello?" cried Liara. "Is there any one here?"

"Something is wrong," muttered Javik. "The scientists should be here."

"Just when you think it couldn't get any worse . . ." began Tali.

"Be quiet Tali," suggested Garrus. "Don't give the Spirits any more ideas."

"Umm, found the scientists," said James in a manner which suggested it was bad.

And it was. The scientists were dead.

"Their throats," observed Javik.

"What happened to them?" asked John.

"They've been slit," elaborated Liara.

"I kind of figured that when Javik said the word 'throat'," replied John somewhat wearily.

"This wasn't a Reaper hit," concluded Garrus. "This isn't their style. Mangled corpses is more to their liking. This was a professional job, done from stealth. And the bastard wasn't here that long ago."

Tali began to scan the corners and ceiling.

Her eyes fell upon the great statue of Athane.

"Who is this supposed to be?" she asked.

"The Goddess Athane herself," answered Liara. "It's a relic of the old faith."

"Then why does Athane speak Prothean?" asked Javik.

Everyone slowly turned to Javik. It had been the last thing they had expected to be said.

"What do you mean?" asked Liara, who was stunned. John on the other hand, recalling Javik's level of sensitivity began to suspect that he could guess the origin of the ancient faith of Athane.

In the ancient days of Earth's history, there were ideologies and ontologies which so utterly crippled their adherents ability to discover new technology and learning that when they encountered the cities of the more civilized or even their ruins, they would often ascribe the works to the gods or giants. Javik had made the observation that the Asari had finally learned to write. And Javik had expressed knowledge of the Asari, whom the Reapers had ignored in their harvest cycle.

"There is something here," Javik said. "I can sense it."

"In this temple?" asked Liara. "I admit is is strange that this place is so well preserved. Though Athane has great historical significance. We once believed that our Gods were separate from our world, looking down on us."

"But they are," observed John quietly. "The universe exist entirely outside of God, maintained entirely by his will."

He began to ponder. Where had the Asari gotten things mixed up? What ancient heresy had muddied the understanding?

He reached for the altar in front of the statue and then he understood.

"There's a Prothean beacon here!" he said.

"What?" cried Liara. "You're sure?"

"Shepherd's entire mission has been defined by his encounter with that Prothean Beacon on Eden Prime," said Kaiden. "It's what enabled him to understand about the Reapers, it's what has driven him since. That knowledge of destruction. He would know."

"It's not something you forget," answered John.

"But why hide it?" asked Liara.

"The answer is obvious," said Javik. "Power and influence."

"Surprised?" added James looking at Kaiden who looked back and sighed.

"Your people are holding the knowledge of my race for their own gain," continued Javik.

"That. . . can't . . . be," said Liara. Was she in denial that her own people had so sabotaged the war effort up to this point, or was she experiencing a crises of faith which suggested that the Goddess was the Asari personification of ancient Prothean guidance.

For John, the answer was obvious. The heresy had been that when the Protheans had started to guide the Asari race, the heretics had mixed the two together in order to link up the simple Asari devotion to The Goddess, with the power that knowledge given to them by the Protheans. When the high priestess of The Goddess can build the bigger and stronger wall, simple folk conclude that The Goddess is telling them how. It also explained how the doctrine of Athane faded. Once technology spread to all the Asari, there was nothing special about Athane any more. The same thing had happened in Europe. The Europeans, technologically superior to any of the other races, nations, and tribes in the 18th and 19th century, had linked Christianity and their technological superiority together in a cynical manipulation to awe the tribes of Africa and Asia. Of course it backfired in the end on the Europeans, and Christianity's ability to convert Africa and Asia was severely crippled until a generation after the Europeans had been driven out.

"I can't believe my people would keep this a secret!" she snapped angrily.

"It certainly could explain why the Asari are so advanced," agreed John.

"This temple then, is thousands of years old," observed Javik. "Time enough to make serious progress."

"That doesn't make it true," argued Liara.

"Just because the sun rose in the east today don't mean it will tomorrow," commented James. "But that's what I'd bet on."

"Even a small amount of data would give your species and edge," continued Javik. "Or are you insulted that your government didn't involve you?"

"The Mars ruins are where humanity got Mass Effect technology," said John.

"And we learned of it from the ruins of the Inusannon," added Javik. "The race that came before us. It was our secret for centuries."

John's first impulse was to argue that the Asari should have shared the knowledge, but then he checked himself. The galaxy wasn't always a nice place, and knowing something that your bad boys did not was security for a lot of innocent little people. Just the same, the information was needed now.

"If they had told us sooner," he observed. "We might not have been in this mess."

"You don't know that Shepherd," Liara rightly pointed out.

"What I do know is that we don't have much time to find out," he retorted.

"If we're all done pointing fingers," suggested Kaiden. "Perhaps we can figure out how to use this to save the galaxy.

Liara began to examine things with her omni-tool.

"The few records I can assess," she said. "Talk about tapping into Prothean data streams. Reconstructing matrixes. None of which I see here."

"I do," said Javik. "The activation process . . . has begun."

He proceeded to go to a specific relic which had ancient Asari pilgrims standing before a hooded creature and he triggered a sequence which opened up the statue.

"By the Goddess," said Liara as streams of energetic light began to stream from the ancient statue. "Literally!"

"Look around!" ordered Shepherd. "There must be more of these connections."

Within a moment, Liara noted that the entire temple seemed to be responding to Shepherd.

"It must be the cypher you got on Pharos all those years ago," she said. "It's why the temple thinks you're Prothean."

"Or it could be the Prothean standing next to you," observed Javik.

"What do you think, Blue?" queried James tilting his head towards Javik.

"I have my suspicions, Mex." concluded Kaiden likewise glancing at Javik.

"The end of the war is near," stated Javik. He was sounding excited, in so far as he would allow himself to sound. "Find what we need. Finish the Crucible, and vengeance is complete."

As each artifact began to trigger, Javik in a manner suggesting a little pride, informed Liara that Asari superiority was directly due to the Protheans. Something which clearly annoyed Liara on several levels.

"And you owe the Mass Effect Relays to the Reapers," she retorted. It was a good comeback and James in particular winced over that one. "How did that turn out?" She finished.

"So you do bite," answered Javik. "Good." Once again he was sounding pleased. "We'll need that."

Tali found the last artifact which triggered the full activation. The statue fell into pieces revealing the beacon beneath it. The effort to tap into the information began.

"We need to hurry," said Liara. "This place isn't going to . . ."

And at this point a Prothean VI manifested itself in front of her.

". . . last long," she sighed in amazement.

Over the next few moments, the Prothean VI tested John, Liara, and Javik. Once however it had determined that Javik was Prothean it asked him the following question, "Do you believe this cycle can deliver retribution?"

"They have earned the right to try," answered Javik.

What they learned in the next few moments was telling. The Protheans had not developed the Crucible, they had merely refined the design which they had found in the ruins of the Inusannon. And they had gotten it from an earlier race. The Prothean VI itself was named Vendetta and it had been the chief VI on the Prothean efforts to build the crucible. But that effort had been sabotaged by a splinter group who had argued that they should dominate the Reapers. It had turned out later, after the Prothean Crucible had been destroyed, that the splinter group itself had been indoctrinated.

Once again it made perfect sense to John. One of the classic lies of the Christian devil was the promise that if one simply did this or that evil thing, one would transform into a god. And as the Reapers presented themselves as gods to the 'lesser' races, the temptation to be the god of the gods would be very real indeed. The Reapers, so secure in their vaunted superiority, did not fear to make such a promise to their victims since they knew it was one which would never been accomplished, save by the Reapers themselves, when those foolish worshipers were broken down into their molecular components and transformed into a new Reaper.

But as the VI began the process of transferring the information on the Catalyst to the team, it alerted to an indoctrinated presence. John and the team turned, and stepping into the temple was the very assassin who had killed Thane. An assassin whom John had learned the name of.

"Leng!" he said. "You killed the scientists! What do you want?"

"Your attention," Kai Leng replied. "Someone would like to talk with you."

And he proceeded to activate an omni-comm-link and The Illusive Man sprang into view.

"Shepherd," he said.

"How did you find this place?" asked John.

"The archives," answered Tim. "Or did your Shadow Broker miss that one?"

"Show yourself," snapped Liara. "And I promise you I won't miss."

"Stick to your talents Dr. T'Soni. You've uncovered the key to subjugating the Reapers," replied Tim.

When one sees history starting to repeat itself right after the history lesson, things can get a little unsettling. The fact that Tim was confirming what John had been suspecting all along; that his sabotage of the United Species efforts at resisting the Reapers was directly the result of his determination to be the god of the gods, which of course only proved he was in the thralls of indoctrination, caused John to almost lose his balance from the shock. Tali was not so lucky, she was busy staggering for about five seconds.

"Or destroying them," argued John. He knew that indoctrination wasn't total. That he might still reach Tim.

"Get real Shepherd," argued Tim. "Destroying the Reapers gains us nothing!"

"How about peace?" replied John.

"They're just trying to control us," retorted Tim. "Think about it. If they wanted all organic life destroyed, they could do it. There would be nothing left."

"What the hell are you talking about?" asked John. He found Tim's reasoning a serious stretch. Yes, Tim was right in that the Reapers could have destroyed all organic life. But the Reapers needed organic life to reproduce themselves. That was the discovery of the Collector missions. If you wish to live forever, you have to have a means of perpetuating yourself forever. For the Reapers, that was organic life. Hence the _cycled harvest_.

"I know them Shepherd," continued Tim. "I know how they think."

"I think you've gotten a little too close to the enemy," observed John.

"No, I'm saying they've got it right. Why kill when you can control?"

Tim's argument was so utterly out of touch with the entire Reaper modus operendi that John did not have a clue where to start. Indoctrination, which was so luring to Tim, was merely the means to the end, which was the harvest. Why kill when you can control? The whole point of the control was to make the kill more accessible! Just like the Nazi's and Communists employed the Gulags to liquidate their political and economic adversaries. The point of the Gulag and Concentration Camp hadn't been to control the prisoners, it was to enable the Communists and Socialists to use control to enable them to more swiftly and easily kill their opponents. Hence the reason why they were called Death Camps and Killing Fields.

"The Reapers have it right?" John asked. "You're indoctrinated! You're doing just what they want. You are playing right into their schemes!"

"I could say the same of you," suggested Tim. "Wasting time in a war which can't be won."

Again, it was clear that Tim had lost his ability to think through things. The whole point of the Crucible was to win a war which could not be won by any other means. Tim's argument only made sense if the Crucible did not exist. Yet Tim knew it did exist and furthermore, had worked very hard to keep John and his team from gaining the plans for it. And wasting time fighting a war that could not be won? How was that wasting time? There had been a strategy among the Jews in the Death Camps of the German Socialists. Every day one was alive, one beat the Nazi's in a small way. Yes, they would all die eventually, but by struggling to remain alive for just one more day, one put the National Socialist clock back a notch. Again the Reapers were harvesting all organic space-faring life. To fight them was to slow the process down, given some people the chance to die of old age. To give some people the ability to raise a new generation which might find a way to win it. Tim's argument was merely a shoddy justification for his own desire to be the ruler of the Reapers.

There was nothing to say for that. How do you answer such a thing? "At least I'm fighting," he snapped back. It was a completely useless answer, merely full of bravado, not unlike the bulls-eye on your back imagery he had given to the clone. He regretted saying it the moment it came out of his mouth.

"Never question my ability to fight," retorted Tim. As John reflected, his answer had proven even worse in consequence. "I've been fighting longer than you can imagine. And don't assume you know me. My methods for dealing with the Reapers are simply more refined than yours."

And once again the indoctrination of Tim came out. He had utterly persuaded himself that he was manipulating the Reapers. He was 'outwitting' them. Again his thinking was clearly crippled. If he was that close to taking over the Reapers, the Crucible was not a threat. He had to know it's completion was still in the future. Easily months away, if not a year and a half. Once he had 'taken over' there would be no further need to continue it's construction. In fact, John had no doubts that large numbers of the people involved in building it would leave the project and go home, especially the human elements. Or, should the United Species continue to construct the said device, a military strike at it's base would end the entire threat. In short, Tim would have dozens of options in order to end the threat of the Crucible prior to it's employment on the Reapers. Likewise, if he knew how the Crucible worked, he'd know just what sort of maneuvers would be needed to keep it from being employed as well. To deliberately sabotage the actions of an enemy of your enemy was the mark of a fool. Especially when the sabotage was directed not against the most dangerous of enemies, but the least dangerous. John understood how Tim was thinking. Tim had persuaded himself that he was smarter than anyone else, he was already on his way to being the god of the gods. Hence, his arrogance utterly blinded him to the fact that he was being played by the very creatures he thought he was about to dominate.

"Cerberus was supposed to be humanity's sword," observed Shepherd. "Not a dagger in our back." It was a better response than mere bravado.

"Politic, but as usual, you miss the point," replied Tim. "The world is more grey than you care to admit." He was, as was so often the case, fuzzing the lines of morality so that he would not have to deal with the jabs his conscious no doubt was inflicting upon his thinking. After all, defeat or dominate the Reapers, either way humanity ends up advancing.

"With the Prothean data in this beacon I can end this conflict once and for all," answered John. That wasn't a question of grey. It was a statement of clear black verses clear white.

Throughout this conversation, Kai Leng was pacing back and forth with his sword out. Liara was keeping an eye on him. Tim's arguments had reminded her of an old stereotype she had routinely fallen back on back earlier in her life, that of human treachery. While she never doubted John for a moment, or James and Kaiden either, she had no illusions about Tim and Kai playing nice. She gave Garrus a quick glance, he read her expression flawlessly and nodded back. His gun shifted in his arms into a new 'relaxed' state.

"You are either with me or against me," finished John focused entirely on Tim. "There is nothing grey about that."

"No," said Tim half quietly half to himself. "I suppose there isn't." His image proceeded to walk out of the temple. "Leng," he continued. "The commander has something I need. Please relieve him of it. And then bring me the data."

One of the most fascinating things about the 'mystery of evil' is it's utterly inability to effectively calculate in advance. This isn't to say evil is not cunning, indeed it is more cunning than anything else in the galaxy. But it does, in the end, show itself to be stupid. It cleverly maneuvers itself through victory after victory right up to the instant it self-destructs. Tim was in the midst of that self-destruction though he did not know it. He simply refused to consider the fact that Shepherd was the most dangerous opponent in the galaxy. A man who had already killed two reapers and destroyed two of their galactic allied forces in the prior two years. He simply assigned a single assassin, no doubt very good, to fight a team of exactly eight skilled opponents who had seen far more combat than any one of the members of Cerberus, and had themselves each carved out a niche in the records of the war.

"Understood," replied Kai, who has anything if not confidant. He went straight into battle stance.

The entire team went into battle mode and then a gunship rose up and fired a full component of directed missiles which blew things to hell. The entire team would have had no trouble taking down Kai by himself, regardless of his biotic and armored talents and possessions. But missiles were designed to take out armored and shielded personal in a single blow and while John's team was good, it remained good precisely because each and every one of them understood that when missiles were fired, you kissed mother earth and took cover. Through the explosions which shattered the floors and walls of the temple, Kai simply walked up and took the data.

"Cerberus thanks you for all your hard work," he joked.

By the time the crew was able to pull themselves back up, Kai had flown away and the Reapers resumed their invasion of Thessia. The last thing Shepherd heard as he walked out of the temple and saw two more Reapers landing on the city was Lieutenant Kurin's death cries over the com-link.

There was no doubt in any of the minds of the Team. Cerberus was working for the Reapers, and unlike the Reapers, Cerberus could be defeated. And finally, Cerberus had something which made the defeat of the Reapers possible.

The Illusive Man had deftly, cunningly, and cleverly maneuvered himself into Shepherd's bulls-eye. And Shepherd had the entire United Species behind him.

And Tim had no clue what he had just done.

For starters, he had made John extremely depressed.

Because you see, the defeat at that moment was far more in John's mind than it's ultimate consequence. It would be a while before John would see what the final consequence was.

The Asari Councilor wanted to talk very shortly afterwards. She wanted to know if the information had helped, how soon the Crucible would be able to be deployed. And John had no good news for her.

"We did not get the information," he admitted.

"What happened!" she said, concern and worry etching itself across her face.

"Cerberus was there," answered John. "We were . . . We were defeated. We don't know how to finish the Crucible."

"I eh . . ." she started. "I don't know what to say. "What was the situation on Thessia?"

"Deteriorating fast, the Reapers are there in strength," he said.

"Then you will excuse me," she stammered, half weepy. "There are preparations to make. Continuity of Civilization to consider. I never thought this day would come."

"None of us did," answered John. It wasn't entirely true. He had been screaming about it for two years. But he wasn't going to spend his time shouting "I told you so!" to a politician who was finally sobering up. "I'm sorry," he finished as she winked out.

He went back to his cabin. He then sent a message to Tali. It said simply, "I need you."

Five minutes later she was there. And they held each other for twenty minutes. Then they let each other go, dabbed away each other's threatened tears, and John returned to the Command Station.

EDI promptly informed him that Reaper reinforcements were coming in so fast that the Asari were in full retreat on all fronts. It was becoming dangerous to remain, even under stealth.

"Get us out of here," he ordered.

Liara was to his right, her head hung down.

"Shepherd," she practically sobbed. "I . . . Nobody . . . Could have predicted . . . Cerberus . . . Would reach Thessia before us."

"It's my job to be prepared," answered John, taking full responsibility. "No matter what. And now Thessia is lost. As is the data on the Catalyst." He paused. "I AM SICK OF CERBERUS BEATING US TO THE PUNCH!"

"Then let's kick them in the balls for a change," suggested James strongly.

"I with James," replied John. "Anyone know where they're hiding?" He paused. "Anyone?"

There was silence from EDI and Liara. Then all of a sudden.

"Well . . . Um," began Samantha. "Something . . ." She left it a pregnant pause.

"Let's hear it, Traynor," ordered Shepherd.

"I was able to track Kai Leng's shuttle through the Relay and extrapolate his destination," she proceeded. Images began to spring up on the Command Center hologram map. "But the signal disappeared in the Iera System."

"Naturally," was John's cynical retort.

"It's not just gone though," continued Samantha. "The signal is being actively blocked."

"How?" asked John, catching a very faint whiff of hope in the air.

"I'm not sure," answered Samantha. "But something is interfering with signal activity in that region of space."

"Commander," interjected EDI. "The Iera system is home to Sanctuary and little else. Sanctuary is a supposed safe haven for War Refugees."

"You think it's worth checking out Traynor?" queried Shepherd. He had already decided that it was, but he wanted Traynor to feel like she mattered a bit more.

"Yes sir," she answered. "I do."

"If Specialist Traynor hadn't examined the data so astutely, the interference would have been undetectable," observed EDI.

"Nice work Traynor," replied Shepherd. "You've given us a shot. Now let's make sure we don't waste it!"

"I was stationed on Horizon in the Iera system," interjected Kaiden. "Before it became known as Sanctuary. You were the only Cerberus presence there."

"It's a slim lead," commented Liara. "Let's hope it's the right one."

"I don't care how slim the leads are at this point," answered Shepherd. "We've come to far to let Cerberus stop us! I want that Prothean data. I want the Catalyst. No excuses! Dismissed!"

John walked out of the Command Center and headed for the elevator. He took it down one level and walked into Engineering. Tali was at her terminal with Gabby going over the latest issues. John waited for Gabby to notice him and salute. He returned the salute and Tali turned to face him.

"Yahn?" she asked.

"Can we talk?" he asked.

She turned back to Gabby, who jerked her thumb to the tantalus core observation barbican. Tali nodded and she headed in that direction while John followed.

"What is it Yahn?" she asked as they got there.

"We're heading to Horizon and hopefully pursue a lead on Kai Leng. I'm worried," he said quietly.

"Why?" she asked. Once upon a time she would have dismissed his fears on the grounds that he was Commander Shepherd and he would come up with a plan, he always did. But now, that she was his wife, and knew him far far better, she knew he wouldn't be worried unless there was a very good reason for him to be worried. She was not there to buck him up, though she regarded that as an essential part of these little private mission talks, she was there to give him insights if she could, and if not, just hold his hands and look into his face - reminding herself not to be fixated on a stray eyebrow hair or blackhead or oily crevice - and let him know she loved him and trusted him.

"I'm afraid matters are getting out of our control," he continued. He looked into her visor, wishing he could see past it. Her pale white eyes glowed back at him. He knew he had her full attention. "Let us say this lead on Kai Leng is genuine and sends us forward. He's the Illusive Man's new protege. He might lead us to the Illusive Man. We get the Illusive Man, we find out what the Catalyst is. Problem is, we also alert the Reapers that we know about it. We will be tipping our hand. We're going to be informing the Reapers that we're working on the Crucible. And it's not done yet."

"Yahn?" observed Tali. "I think they already know that."

John just looked at her.

"Javik told us they got the plans for the Crucible from the Inusannon. And the Inusannon got it from an earlier race. So the Reapers know all about the Crucible. They've had to take it into account in each of their harvests. And the Protheans knew about the Catalyst and they got that information also from the Inusannon. So Yahn, the Reapers know about the Catalyst as well."

"But I mean if we go for Cerberus, who know what the Catalyst is, then that tells the Reapers we're working on the Crucible."

"Yahn, they know we are working on the Crucible," she continued. "The Reapers landed on Mars right after you did, remember? They have had indoctrinated agents working in the Council. You had to deal with that one Hanar with Kasumi, remember?"

"Then the Reapers already have the Catalyst," sighed John. "And we are on a fool's errand."

"Yahn," continued Tali. "You yourself taught me again and again that you can't assume anything. Let us say that the Reapers know what the Catalyst is? What if it's yust a glass of water? They can't stop us from getting that. What if it's yust a single Mass Effect Field which yenerates a particular frequency which fires the Crucible? Yahn, again they can't stop us from having that. The only thing they have over us is that we don't know what it is. Once we know what it is, we will know how to use it, and likewise know how to gain access to it."

J0hn sighed and smiled.

"What would I do without you?" he asked.

She took his hands in hers, looked up at him and said, "Save the galaxy without me probably, just not as romantically and without such a wonderfully upgraded and finely tuned spaceship. But you'll do it Yahn. You always do in the end. Which is one of the reasons why I fell in love with you."

"Does that mean if I fail to save the Galaxy you won't love me anymore?"

"Don't be silly Yahn, I love you now because you are such a wonderful bond-mate. But I would punch you in the arm a couple of times."

"I can see it now," sighed John. "Reporter Diana Allers is going to ask me how I was able to save the galaxy and I'm going to say, 'Tali had a fist'."

"Come here Yahn, lean in next to my face please," she said.

And as John did, she took off her visor plate for a second, and kissed him once before clamping it back on.

"Now be my Yahn and get up there and save the galaxy," she said.

"Yes dear," replied John.

Gabby, who had overheard the last bit of the conversation, since it was not so whispered turned to Tali as John departed and asked. "How are you able to do that? It's . . . It's Commander Shepherd."

Tali looked at Gabby and seemed to think for a moment.

"Same way you are able to do it to Ken," she answered.

Gabby seemed to think for a moment. "Yeah," she said. "I guess once you get to know them, they get pretty ordinary don't they."

"Oh I wouldn't say ordinary," mused Tali in a flirty tone. "He makes me feel like I'm floating away when he makes love to me. But at times like right now? He's yust . . . He's yust Yahn."

John was barely in the elevator when he received a signal that Admiral Anderson wanted to speak with him. He walked right into the communications center. Anderson would be a good person to talk to about this.

"Shepherd," began Anderson. "I heard about Thessia."

"We were so close Anderson," sighed John. "So damn close to ending this war."

"You didn't think it would be that easy did you?" replied Anderson. "Remember Machiavelli's observation, 'Wars begin when you will, but don't end when you please'."

"I knew going in there that not a minute of this war would be easy," replied John beginning to pace. "But watching Thessia fall, standing next to Liara, and knowing it was my responsibility."

"Shepherd? You know how many times I had my ass handed to me over the years?" barked Anderson back. "Surviving the First Contact War in my day was a damned miracle. They said I was a hero and I . . . just felt lucky to get out alive. So maybe Kai Leng did beat you. What of it?"

"It could cost us the war," replied John.

"These guys in the resistance, they know it's a losing proposition," answered Anderson. "They know the chances of seeing tomorrow are slim to none. But they all signed up anyway. Hell, I'm sitting in London right now staring at rubble. I was born here. And it's looking like I might die here too. So I say, 'Point us at the Reapers and we'll take our chances.'"

"You'll make it Anderson," answered John. "And when this is all over, you can show me London."

Anderson laughed. "It might need a new coat of paint first," he suggested.

"This will be over soon," promised John. He really had no way of knowing if that was the case, but it's the sort of things soldiers have said to each other and their families since the dawn of time.

"It had better," said Anderson. "Shake this off Shepherd!"

"I will," John replied.

He walked up to the bridge where Joker was observing that the Asari were no doubt wishing they had more commandos and less dancers. Joker looked over to John and found him frowning.

"Too soon?" He ventured.

"In case you haven't noticed," snapped John. "We just lost a few million people. This isn't the time!"

Joker's response was to bring up a map of planet.

"You see this?" He asked. "Tiptree. Little colony in the ass end of nowhere. My dad lives there. So does my sister. Reapers rolled in about two weeks ago. So you can assume I'm generally aware there's a war on Commander."

"So why the jokes?" demanded John.

"Because EDI says that according to your metabolic scans you are under more stress than you were under any other time in your life. More than the Suicide Mission when there were ten thousand collectors all trying to kill you! And the last time I had a briefing with Anderson, he told me to take care of you! The guy leading the resistance, on Earth, _is worried about you!_ And I'm _supposed to help_," grumbled Joker exasperated. He carefully and without undue stress raised his arms in a gesture of frustration.

"I appreciate the thought Joker," snapped John. "But I'm fine."

"The hell you are," retorted Joker. "You are like half robot at this point!" He cast a glance at EDI. "No offense EDI. And it's my fault. When the collectors blew the first Normandy, you died because I wouldn't leave. Because _you_ had to come back for _me_."

"I couldn't leave the best pilot in the fleet behind," suggested John. "Could I?"

"Yeah well," sighed Joker. "I guess that would have looked bad on your report."

"Come on," suggested John, trying to be encouraging. "We've got work to do."

Suddenly John was reminded that there were other people suffering as well. Joker was worried about him. His own father and sister were possibly dead and Joker was taking the time to worry about him.

Liara might have some new information on Kai Leng and the mysterious blocked signal. He proceeded to her office. But she wasn't there. He did a quick deduction and walked in on a shouting argument between her and Javik in Javik's quarters. No one it seems was taking the defeat easily.

"That's not true!" was what Liara was shouting as he walked in. "We earned our place in the galaxy!" She was walking back and forth in front of Javik, who remained simply standing in front of her, while she had her fists clenched at at her side.

"Stop denying reality Asari," retorted Javik. "Your people took the knowledge of my people from the beacon."

"I have a name," Liara angrily exhaled. "It's Liara T'Soni! And I . . ."

"Hey! Settle down!" snapped John.

"My home was just destroyed!" Liara said through narrowed eyes and glowing biotics about her face. She was ready to explode. "And all he can do is gloat!"

"Given what has happened," suggested John. "I think you owe Liara an apology, Javik."

"Apologize for the truth?" queried Javik crossing his arms.

"For not doing more!" exlaimed Liara, now almost in tears. "You were a Prothean. You were supposed to have all the answers! How could you not stop this from happening?"

"We believed you would," Javik quietly suggested.

Liara settled down and looked curiously at John, and then at Javik.

"Long ago we saw the potential in your people," began Javik. "Even then it was obvious; the wisdom, the patience: you were the best hope for this cycle. So you were guided when necessary."

"Well it didn't work," came a whispered sigh from Liara.

"You're still alive aren't you?" queried Javik. "Your world may have fallen, but as long as even one Asari is left standing, the fight isn't over."

"I guess that goes for Protheans too," exhaled Liara.

"Despair is the enemies' greatest weapon," observed Javik. John nodded in assent. He knew that first hand. "Do not let them wield it, Liara T'Soni."

Liara nodded quietly and walked out presumably to return to her own office, leaving Javik and John to look at each other.

John paused for a moment. He was seeing a more empathic side of Javik. That Prothean coldness and arrogance which had been wielded for so long had suddenly faded for a moment.

"That was . . . unexpected," admitted John. "Thank you."

"We still need her talents," explained Javik. "If grief overcomes her. She will be lost to us."

John nodded. Javik was exercising the skills that come from good leadership. Even back in his cycle, the same things were needed. But even so, John was curious.

"So did you actually mean what you said?" he asked.

"Does it matter?" asked Javik.

John of course knew it did. It had to ring true to be most effective. And the only way to make an encouraging gesture ring true was to believe one was actually speaking the truth.

"Liara means a great deal to me," explained John, hoping Javik would understand that John was thinking of Liara as a close friend, and more importantly, the woman his best friend loved. "It matters," he concluded.

"Then I will tell you what you want to hear," answered Javik, who was falling back behind his Prothean shield. "I meant what I said."

"Carry on," said John, not knowing if he should sigh in exasperation or chuckle at the eccentricity of the galaxy's last known Prothean. He headed back towards engineering.

In the meantime, Tali was in communication with Garrus from their respective posts. Tali was busy monitoring the power flows and Garrus was busy with the guns, making sure they were as precise as possible. In other words, he was calibrating.

"I've never seen Liara like this," she was explaining. "Not even after Noveria."

Garrus was making various noises which resembled language in an effort to express that first of all, he knew how upset Liara was, and second of all, he had no clue how to deal with it.

"Can you talk to her?" continued Tali. "You've known her as long as any of us and you love her. And with Palavan . . ."

"I'm just another damned reminder how many people are dying," explained Garrus. "You should talk to her."

"I yust regained my homeworld," explained Tali. She was completely clueless as to what to say to Liara as well. "She yust lost her's."

"Well," stammered Garrus over the comm-link. "I don't have any magic words. She needs time and maybe you can call her later."

"She went straight to her cabin. She's not answering any calls," answered Tali.

"I'll go talk to her," suggested John behind Tali as he was walking up.

"Good," said Tali looking over her shoulder at John. He could see her eyes through the visor, they were dim, and slightly droopy, as if she were sad or tired or both. "When she went by . . . She yust, really needs someone now."

John walked up to Tali and embraced her. She tightly embraced him back. There was a brief brushing on his ankle before Tali remembered that her boots did not allow her to grip him with her toes, but already her fingers were locked down in his shoulders.

"We all need each other right now," he said. "Joker may have lost his father and sister yet he's worried about me. Liara is struggling because her Prothean did not save her planet and Garrus doesn't know what to say to make it better. And of course James and Kaiden are being reminded that Earth is being raped. And me? I'm seeing Tim dangling the solution to the war in front of my face and laughing at me, and what's so angering me is Tim's complete ignorance over the fact that he is the Reaper's best friend."

"Yahn," sighed Tali. "My beloved Yahn, my darling Yahn, you're not getting over this in a few moments. You're going to have to stew in it for a while. I can tell." She reached up and gently caressed his face with her hand. "So go and stew, think it out, play it out, learn from it, and when you get back to the cabin, I'll be there to make love to you and let you forget for a while okay?"

John simply held her for a few more moments, struggling to relax, to calm down, to get his mind to think beyond his anger. On a certain level he knew that mistakes were made at times like this, battles were lost because of these emotional moments. He needed clarity and Tali was a calming effect upon him. Feeling her grip around his back, her fingers pressing into his shoulders so tightly enabled him to clear his mind for just a moment.

"I suspect I'm going to be doing this routinely for a while," he said, half apologetically.

"And it's okay," she said. "I can put up with it after all. I mean, I've discovered I have a very high tolerance for bond mates hugging me."

He looked into her eyes through her visor.

"I'm sorry Yahn," she said sadly. "I've still got an itchy nose from the last kiss an hour ago. I have to pass."

He nodded and sighed and proceeded to Liara's office and cabin.

"I've studied Protheans my entire life," said Liara as John walked into her cabin. But she wasn't talking to him. She was talking to . . . whom? John could not see anyone she was facing. He was about to panic thinking she was slipping into madness, when the answer to his query presented itself.

"If I'd been shown the beacon on Thessia earlier . . ." she continued.

"You would have needed Shepherd's cypher to comprehend it," answered EDI's voice. After all, there was no place on the ship where EDI was not. Liara did not have to be next to the robot EDI, as was Joker, to converse with her.

"I still could have learned from it," persisted Liara. "Instead, my mother hid the galaxy's most important archeological find from me. It must have been such a joke for her when I became a Prothean researcher."

"The penalties for withholding Prothean technology are among the harshest in Council Space," reflected EDI. "Your mother's motives may have been simply to shield you."

"Perhaps," admitted Liara. "Thank you EDI. I . . . hadn't considered that."

John walked halfway across the room. Liara noticed him out of the corner of her eye.

"How did this happen Shepherd?" she asked quietly. "My entire civilization . . . The Asari's history . . . The Protheans made it a lie all along. And I abandoned my people to hunt for the Catalyst."

It was survivor's guilt. John knew how to deal with that.

"You would never do that," he replied.

"They are dying by the millions!" she shouted. "I told those people on Thessia we'd save them! How many Asari died because I demanded their help?"

"None," answered John.

"Shepherd that isn't true," she answered.

"You've been warning your people for four years, Liara," replied John. "There's not a damn thing you should feel guilty about. If we move fast enough, there's a chance we'll survive this. To start again . . ." John began to call up information on Liara's screens while Liara remained on her bed surrounded by data pads with a young girl expression on her face. "We lost Thessia," continued John. "But we haven't lost the Asari yet."

"Helping the refugees," she whispered as a thought to herself. She proceeded to her equipment. "That's something I can do. It's something I owe them."

"I knew you would think of something," replied John, knowing full well that he had just put the idea into her head when he began tuning her information conduits towards those very issues.

"I still need some time, Shepherd," she said. "But thank you."

John walked out of her office and sighed with relief. He had pulled her out of her slump, and had gotten her back to hard work. She would be okay. Now how to get himself out of the slump.

An analysis of Cerberus forces, that was the key. If Sanctuary proved to be a Cerberus front, yet another act of treachery to suck in victims from the war for Tim's pro-Reaper experiments, then there would be soldiers a plenty. Soldiers he had already experienced fighting. Soldiers of whom Petrovsky was more than skilled at leading. Hard work, that was what he needed too. He went to his cabin, and called up Petrovsky.

For the next few hours, the two men talked. Most of it was combat styles, the sort which Cerberus troops were trained in using, though Petrovsky had nothing more than the bare bones knowledge of the Reaper technology enhanced forces which Tim was relying upon more and more. But John was preparing himself for what ever might be waiting for him and his team on Horizon slash Sanctuary. As he and Oleg began to wrap things up, Tali came into the cabin humming to herself. John thanked Oleg as the hissing of clamps being unlatched reminded his ears that Tali was getting ready for bed. Lights went out and as he switched off, he could heard very quiet, almost whispered, "Yahn? Come to bed."

He did not bother getting into his sweats, he crawled in under the sheets and felt her snuggle up to him.

"I love you," she said to him softly, and he remembered that the first time he had heard her saying that, he had thought the world was about to end then. For the last four years, the world had refused to do so. So maybe he had more time after all. And for the rest of the night, he forgot about defeat and the possible end of the world.


	34. Chapter 34 - Emergency Induction Port

It was the second of September. The team was in a shuttle heading for Horizon, now known as Sanctuary. John was pacing back and forth, mentally rechecking everything he had determined and planned for. This was a mission to find leads to Cerberus. If they were lucky, they would find what they needed. If not, they would have to pursue another angle. But one thing was for certain. Either Cerberus had the information on the Catalyst or no one did. And here John had to smile. The irony was that as Tim valued information above all else, this was one piece of information that he would not destroy. Even though the United Species knowledge of it would enable them to deploy the Crucible, Tim would not destroy it. Instead, he was counting on the veil of secrecy he had woven around himself to prevent that very thing from happening. But of course, as any Salarian Special Opts would have told him, the more people know about you, the harder it is to keep anything about you secret. Tim's pursuit of power had given him a very wide reach, but it also had given him a very wide vulnerability. If there was any connection between Cerberus and Sanctuary, then there would be piles of data that Liara would be able to sift through and trace them down. Once Team Normandy was on the ground, there would not be sufficient time for Cerberus to cover their tracks. And that was because the Normandy was a stealth ship.

"So what do we know Commander?" asked Kaiden and he leaned against the wall of the shuttle. Next to him Tali stood and fidgeted.

"EDI?" asked John, who knew she would sum it up faster and better than he could.

"The Sanctuary Facility was devoted to aiding refugees from Reaper controlled systems. The facility went offline in August and there have been no communications since. It is unclear why Kai Leng or Cerberus would be interested in Sanctuary."

"If there's a clue to Cerberus here. We'll find it," said John. "Even though our only link is that signals began to be blocked the moment Kai Leng arrived in the system."

"Sir!" said Cortez suddenly excited. "I'm picking up a signal from the facility. It's weak, but I'll try to boost it."

Suddenly a voice that John had not anticipated coming through began to speak. "This is Orianna Lawson," she said. "Stay away from Sanctuary. It's not what it seems! Please, you must listen to me, they are using . . ." and that was the last of the transmission.

"Orianna Lawson!" exclaimed John. It was Miranda's sister. "If she's here. Miranda can't be far away."

"She has been working on something to protect her sister for months," added Tali. "Ever since last fall."

"That's our link to Cerberus," deduced EDI.

"Approaching the LZ Commander," added Cortez. "And there are scenes of damage."

"Cerberus does not get the jump on us this time!" shouted John as the gate opened and they prepared to leap out.

"Hell Yeah!" added James.

"Stay sharp!" ended John.

Around them was minor damage, with a few small fires and smoke. There had been fire fight here, one which was conducted almost exclusively with small arms fire. Nothing which would not be fixed shortly. Their timing seemed propitious.

"The place looks pretty busted up," continued James.

"But who was fighting whom?" mused Liara.

"By the look of it," suggested Kaiden. "We'll know soon enough."

There was a curious bit of scrambled reception coming over their com links.

"Everyone hear that?" asked John.

"The radio's offline," answered Tali. "Something is jamming our signals."

"Explains no coms coming from the facility," speculated John.

There was a new explosion and to the shouts of 'We got trouble' from either Kaiden or James, John wasn't sure which, a shuttle craft came spinning out of control and crash landed just thirty meters in front of Team Normandy. The markings looked to be Cerberus, but the creature who destroyed it turned out to be a harvester. The harvester was a curiously black winged creature which looked like a cross between a cicada and a dragon. One one hand it looked like it ought not to be able to fly, yet it did.

It was at this point however that stealth Cerberus troops attacked. Using their cloaks, they would try to close with their targets and use blades to bring about a swift end. Like most armors designed to deflect bullets, there were overlapping plates which made the armor vulnerable to a thin sharp blade fitted between the plates. Stealth and sword thus made for a dangerous combination in a battle field which would normally be dominated by the gun.

"I hate these guys," shouted Tali.

Garrus's sniper rifle took out the last of them and the team pushed forward.

"It looks like they were evacuating," mused Liara.

"And the Reapers were gunning for them," added Javik. "It seems that Cerberus has outlived it's usefulness to the Reapers."

"I wonder if Tim will notice this and rethink his strategy or if he's too far gone," mused John out loud.

"We'll find out I'm sure sooner or later," replied Liara.

As they worked their way into the arrival facility, John was reminded of an eerie parallel from history. Two hundred years prior, the death camps of the Socialists and Communists had similar facilities. A happy clean and bright welcome for the arrivals, a request that all possessions be turned over for inspection, and a promise for swift processing and reunification in the compound beyond. But of course, there was no such ending for the millions of victims. It merely cast the illusion to encourage cooperation in hopes of a better situation on the other side. There was captured video of the lines and processing of the refugees, all very orderly and thorough. Records and lists and film, he had seen these in history classes, and they had all thought it was a scene from a bygone, more barbaric, time. How little they had known.

Two more Cerberus shuttles flew by, originating from a tower beyond.

"That's where we are going," ordered John.

They continued to look, and then encountered yet another Cerberus squad. Once again a firefight erupted. Cerberus seemed determined to shoot anyone who wasn't them. Then, the team ran into something else. It was down a hallway where there was a video by Miranda Lawson. How it had escaped scrutiny remained a mystery to John. It was in too public a place and past the beginnings of processing to make much sense, it bore the marks of desperation, some determination to strike back in some fashion, however futile.

"This is Miranda Lawson, if you've managed to get this far, you must be desperate or stupid. Listen to me. This is not a refugee camp. This is a Cerberus facility run by my father, Henry Lawson. Turn back now. There is no help to be found here. All communication is being blocked by the central tower. Sanctuary is a lie. Stay away."

"Okay," exhaled John. "So we have Cerberus, Reapers, and Miranda's crazy father."

"I thought Yoker said we were full up on crazy," suggested Tali.

"Any ideas on how this all fits?" asked John.

A pregnant pause descended upon the entire team. Everyone shuffled feet and looked at each other, but mostly at Liara who was supposed to be the brainiac of the team. Except Javik of course. He remained passively looking forward, trying to convey that he was above all this physical expression of ignorance. He didn't know either, but he was trying to act as if it didn't matter.

"Okay," exhaled John yet again.

The search continued. What data they were picking up was the typical small time office chatter of low level bureaucrats dreaming of higher level jobs beyond the mysterious invisible wall that marked the entrance of the 'refugee camp' and the great tower beyond. It took a bit more searching before they found a security panel which Tali and Liara quickly hacked. What happened next was straight out of a thousand thousand spy vids. A large reflecting pool began to drain while klaxons blared. And as it drained, pipes and other esoteric equipment began to show up.

"The water! What's with the smoke and mirrors," stammered Kaiden.

"Looks like they needed to hide something," suggested John.

As the water drained away, there was a pathway leading to a door down a tunnel.

"Was this really necessary?" queried Tali. "I mean, who is going to use it? And if it's supposed to be a secret escape route?"

"It is rather cool though," suggested Garrus.

"And an incredible waste of resources," argued Tali.

"That doesn't stop it from being cool," retorted Garrus.

"Wasting valuable money and water and equipment to build a secret way into a lab that you will never be able to use because it's right in the middle of a refugee processing center is not cool," persisted Tali.

"It is when you have the resources to waste, and likewise, are the only one who knows about it," continued Garrus. "I can just see Henry Lawson looking down from the tower at this reflecting pool, thinking about all these refugees filing by, those bureaucrats processing them, and saying to himself, "I have a cool secret entrance into my secret laboratory and none of them will ever know."

Tali just looked at Garrus.

"This is about my objections to you and Zaeed booby trapping our apartment at that party isn't it?" she suggested.

"That was cool too," insisted Garrus. "You saw a beautiful glass panel, Zaeed and I saw a really cool exploding glass bomb. And that wire and nitro were just sitting in Zaeed's pocket doing nothing . . ."

"Good thing you two were so drunk you got the wires crossed and only blew out a few light bulbs," finished Tali.

"That was cool too," reflected Garrus.

"Oh I give up!" groaned Tali.

"Never surrender Tali," suggested Garrus. "Never surrender."

The team descended into the not empty pool and sure enough, shortly found a door which opened up on a very dark and scary underground lab. These are relative terms of course. Anyone who knew anything about Team Normandy would know that the arrival of Team Normandy merely made the dark and scary lab not quite so dark but way more scary.

"Cerberus," mused Tali. "With Reaper technology," she continued. "This is going to be bad isn't it?" she concluded.

Surprisingly, for the first few moments, nothing untoward or catastrophic happened. They found themselves in a command center, with the power shut down, and then they looked for a bit until they found the on switch and began turning things on and listening to the reports and watching the vids. It was not a sight for young idealistic eyes. The Vids showed refugees being taken, put into tubes, and transformed into husks. Then a few more switches were thrown and the husks showed up.

Fortunately they were outside the hardened walls of the office. After all, one did not want mindless killing machine husks bursting into the main office, killing the secretaries, playing with the computers, and scratching the data pads. So the team watched the husks crawling outside over the windows which opened onto a vast central chamber, where the husks had apparently been put. The question was of course, why Cerberus was this in bed with the Reapers? John had his suspicions.

"Why would they be making husks?" queried Tali. She was clearly unsettled by the husks crawling up the windows outside the office they were in. "They are just making more troops for the Reapers. They would destroy the facility if they escaped. It's a stupid risk."

"Cerberus has been stupid before Tali," observed Kaiden. "Remember those missions against Cerberus back on the first Normandy?"

"My point," countered Tali. "Every time we found a Cerberus facility, all the people were dead because the thing they had been experimenting on had gotten out and killed them."

John continued to think as they proceeded, now twice as alert since they had seen the husks by the dozens in a vast underground holding chamber. The Illusive Man had insisted that Cerberus was fighting the Reapers, just doing it better than the United Species. If that was true, then Cerberus would not be making Husks to reinforce the Reapers. There had to be another reason. And they needed to find out what it was. But then again, Tim was clearly suffering from indoctrination by the Reapers. He was falling into the be the God of the God's trick which the Reapers had played on the Protheans who had sabotaged the Crucible in Javik's cycle. So the answer could be as simple as 'I will use the tools of the enemy to fight the enemy and when it turns out that the tools of the enemy can only be wielded by the enemy, I shall be very surprised, but I'll also be dead.'

"The Reapers are attacking this place so they perceived it as some sort of threat," was John's first thing he said as he was thinking it out. Or did they for that reason? What better way to suck Tim further in by acting as if he was actually on to something. John had already experienced Reaper deceit first hand in his confrontation with that one Reaper on Rannoch. Even as it lay 'dying' it was lying to him. It was clear that there was more to this, but who was on to whom.

"We need to find out why," he finished.

They found another entry by Miranda. She was informing whomever that the Reaper forces had made a mess of the facility and she was locking things down.

And then on another camera view, Kai Leng walked by.

"And it just keeps getting worse," mused Garrus. "If Harbinger shows up on the front lawn next . . . Well now that I think of it I haven't got a clue what I would say at that point."

"We can't have Garrus left speechless," agreed Tali. "So Harbinyer won't show up."

Kai Leng in the meantime, was communicating in front of the camera to The Illusive Man.

"Miranda Lawson has gotten here sooner than expected," he reported. "Do you want me to deal with her?"

"Only if she gets in your way," replied Tim. "Stay focused on the research data. Find it and get out."

Gone was the 'kill him' mentality of Tim that had been present on Mars. Tim it seems had come to realize that he could not deal with Team Normandy so easily. He was now more in a hit and run mode. Or was it perhaps, that he was beginning to feel the pressure as well? Of course, Tim had no idea Team Normandy was listening in on this conversation. He had no idea that Team Normandy was also at the facility. But it was a telling moment.

"Damn it!" said John. "Let's move."

If he could, he was going to save Miranda. So the team picked up the pace, opened a door, and was swarmed by husks.

"You can't help but be impressed by the plot bunnies," shouted Garrus as he was busy sniping at the husks running up the hallway. "The husks only show up after we have to be somewhere fast!"

"Good thing kittens eat plot bunnies!" replied Tali who had apparently done some research on Earth's flora and fauna. She was of course blasting away with her shotgun.

As they cleared away the last of the husks, they found Henry Lawson's own entries into his data log. It talked about his adjustments to the transformation of the refugees into husks, things he did to speed up the process, how he justified this by the shortness of time they had to learn what they needed to know, the means by which they could dominate and control the Reapers.

It was a very methodical process which he had undertaken, using the refugees as his test subjects. They first learned how to turn humans into husks, then they learned how to control the husks by signals. And then how to make the husks more in control with increased distance. Then they hit their first snag. The husks automatically fell under Reaper control the moment the Reapers were within range and wanted them.

More information from Miranda's undercover work suggested she was busy trying to disable the jamming signals which would warn people away. Likewise she revealed that some form of indoctrination was already being used by Cerberus and those subjects were being sent to The Illusive Man.

"Slave labor," mused John. "A quick way to deal with the sudden shortage of funds to pay the ordinary workers needed for Tim's projects."

Suddenly Tali made an observation. "If they are making shipments to the Illusive Man," she said. "There will be data pointing towards him." She looked at Liara who nodded.

"It's still too early to be certain," Liara said. "But I'd say our chances just rose considerably."

"Good catch Kit . . . Duck!" exclaimed John. "Miranda said she was heading for the tower, so we need to as well." He pressed forward ignoring the grins from the rest of the team. Tali was simply glad that she had a visor hiding her sudden shift to pink in her eyes.

In the meantime, more information revealed that Henry Lawson's project had fully worked out how indoctrination worked. What he was presently stumped with was how to turn that to Cerberus' advantage. The problem of course was that indoctrinated subjects shifted their loyalties to the Reapers the moment the Reapers were in communication range. Consequently Cerberus was setting up a trap for themselves over time. Lawson was aware of the problem. But Tim was determined to press forward.

"Well that explains why the Reaper attack was only brief and of minor consequence," concluded Garrus. "Just enough to keep Tim and Lawson working on this project so they would continue to fall under the control of the Reapers."

Then Kaiden spotted another video. This one of Miranda being jumped by Kai Leng. This led to even more sense of urgency for the team.

There were several more fire fights from left over Reaper troops and then they reached the tower just in time to find Miranda under a console. And she was under a console for a very good reason. Her father was there as well, albeit not under a console so much as behind his daughter Orianna.

"Shepherd!" Miranda said.

"Put the gun down!" said Henry Lawson. He was holding his own daughter, Orianna, hostage.

"That's your daughter!" exclaimed Shepherd.

"She tried to shoot me," explained Lawson. "Her older sister's poisonous influence no doubt."

"Where's Kai Leng?" asked Shepherd.

"Gone," snarled Lawson. "He took what the Illusive Man wanted and left us to die. But now that the Reapers are gone. We have a way out."

Miranda, who had been badly hurt by Kai Leng, though not killed by him, was just getting up.

"Shepherd," she gasped. "Please."

"Here's how it works," began John. "You let her go, and you walk. You can go. You try to leave with her? You die. Got it?"

Lawson was calculating. He noted John's pistol was being held very steady. And he knew that in order to see what was happening with the team and his older daughter Miranda, there was enough of his head exposed from behind Orianna that if Shepherd was that good a shot he would have no trouble putting that bullet into his skull, one quarter of an inch from Orianna's skull.

"Okay," he said. "I let her go, and I walk out of her, deal?"

"Deal," replied John.

Lawson let Orianna go and began to back towards the escape exit. John and Team Normandy relaxed their weapons.

"No deal," said Miranda who hit her father with a blast of biotic energy which threw him out of a window and left him to plummet several stories down into the husks.

"I guess Mr. Lawson forgot that Miranda wasn't part of Team Normandy," observed Garrus. "And thus was not bound by any deals we made with him."

"You can't think too long when your life is at stake," agreed Liara.

Miranda was helping her sister get up. "Did he hurt you?" she asked. "Are you alright?"

Her sister hugged her.

"It's okay Ori," whispered Miranda. "You're safe."

"I'm alright," replied Orianna. "I just want to get out of here."

"We will," assured Miranda. "Give me a minute okay?" She looked towards Team Normandy. Orianna followed her gaze and nodded.

"Commander Shepherd," she began. "Fancy meeting you here."

"I wish I could recover from a shock as fast," sighed Liara.

"I can only deal with power surges on the Normandy," teased Tali looking at Liara. "Not the Asari."

"I don't even want to begin to speculate Liara with her wires crossed," added Garrus.

"We got a break," explained John to Miranda. "Are you alright?"

"I'll be fine," answered Miranda. "Really." She paused for a second. "I don't know how you managed it. But I'm grateful you're here."

"How did you do all this?" asked John. He was very impressed. It was one thing to come in with a full team trained and meshed for operations like this. It was another thing entirely to do it solo after having lived the life Miranda had lived.

"Finding my father did not take long once I confirmed he worked for Tim," she said. "Just had to follow the lies. And once I saw what this place really was? I couldn't just walk away."

"Of course," replied John. He smiled to himself. Liars always prided themselves in their ability to fool the public, the problem was that in order for lies to work, you had to keep them simple and persistent. That created a pattern. A pattern which could be traced to it's source, through a dozen false fronts and through decades of time.

"Things got really complicated when the Reapers showed up," continued Miranda.

"That's something of an understatement," mused Garrus in the background.

"And then Kai Leng," she added.

"You survived," observed John. "Not many people can do that."

"When you informed me he was involved back after the Citadel Coup when you and Tali were living in that apartment, I started taking a few precautions," she answered. "Probably saved my life."

"Miranda," continued John. "This whole thing was a huge risk. You should have told me."

"And that's why I love him," thought Tali to herself. "He would do anything for someone he knew who was in trouble." She gave herself a hug and swung back and forth for a moment closing her eyes and being just happy.

"You have a war to win, Shepherd," reminded Miranda. "This was my fight. It's been a long time coming."

"You did it," confirmed John. "It's over."

"Yes," groaned Miranda, her exhaustion from the stress and fear beginning to catch up with her. "I just wish my sister hadn't been here to see all this."

"About your father . . ." began John.

"I'm glad he's gone," answered Miranda. "I'm sorry if that sounds cold."

It did, and it was, but John wasn't going to point fingers right then. "No," he said. "I understand."

"It's finally over," sighed Miranda. "For both of us. We can stop running."

"Yes," answered John. "You can." He turned to Tali and Liara busy leaning over the big communications device which Henry had communicated to Tim with. "What's our status? Any intel we can use on this place?"

"The research data is gone," said Liara.

"But we've still got basic facility information," added Tali. "Like shuttle arrivals and departures? Cerberus included. It's not a direct link, but it's something to work with."

"Grab anything you can off the computer," ordered John. "We'll take it back to be analyzed."

"I can do better than that," suggested Miranda with a little wicked (or horribly frightening depending on your point of view) grin.

"What?" asked John and Liara both almost simultaneously.

"Before Kai Leng took off," Miranda continued. "I planted a tracer on him. If you act fast, you'll track him right to the Illusive Man."

"Tracer!" exclaimed John. "Sounds like you thought of everything."

"That's the Miranda that so annoyed us with that talent on the Cerberus Normandy," reflected Garrus.

"Not quite," suggested Miranda, trying to be modest for one of the few times in her life. "But nobody's perfect." And it almost sounded as if she actually believed it.

"Thanks Miranda," said John. "This is . . . exactly what we need."

"I thought you might need some good news," she added.

"Damn right," said John.

"Damn straight," added Garrus.

"Very much so," said Liara.

"Yeah baby, we did!" was James observation.

"Good news is illusive," suggested Javik. "Fills you with false hopes and dulls the sharpness of your attack."

"I wonder what it would be like to punch a Prothean," mused Tali.

"What? He and Shepherd get a fist but I get a shotgun?" protested Garrus. "I'm jealous."

"It's because you're so special," suggested Tali. She walked over and gave Garrus a hug.

"Okay I'm special," concluded Garrus patting Tali's back and musing how gentle her hugs were. "Wait a moment, I already knew that!"

"So what's next for you two?" asked John of Miranda and Orianna.

"Get her someplace safe," replied Miranda. "And get this scratch cleaned up."

Tali noted that Miranda's vanity was back on over-clock.

"Okay," answered John. "We've got to follow all of this up."

"I'll be in touch," promised Miranda. "Soon."

"I hope so," replied John.

"Come on Ori," said Miranda, turning to head out. "We've had enough of father's hospitality."

After the tower communications was descrambled and the warnings started being broadcast, the team departed 'Sanctuary'.

On the shuttle back, John mused on the tragedy that this colony had suffered from over the past two years. From the Collector attack to the false Refugee Center. Were there any of the original colonists left around? He didn't know. But he couldn't help but wonder why Horizon had been the center of so much pain and suffering while so many other colonies had so far escaped.

"Ten million billion trillion what ifs behind those eyes," he thought out loud to himself as he watched the planet get smaller and smaller through the view port.

A pair of strong fingers suddenly gripped his shoulder bone.

"What are you thinking of?" asked Tali.

"Why Horizon and not another colony," answered John.

"And the answer?"

"I don't know, Kitten, how could I?"

"You couldn't. At least I couldn't. But you were so pensive at that port hole I had to ask."

"Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! YES!" whispered Liara in increasing excitement.

"Garrus?" queried John with a grin turning around.

"I'm over here," drolled Garrus. And true to his word, he was. He was exactly at the opposite corner that Liara was seated at and apparently busy rubbing down his rifle and cleaning out the barrel. "Liara is getting excited by her Omni-tool."

"I'm following the tracer," she answered looking up with a little grin. "I feel so Shadow Broker right now. Ooo, I live for moments like this. You don't know at all Leng do you? He he he!" She wasn't laughing. She was merely sounding out the words associated with a verbal description of laughter, and doing it in a lower voice.

"It's moments like this Liara," suggested John. "That I'm glad you are on my side."

"And she's not even a Commando. She's only an Archeologist. Asari can be scary," observed Garrus.

"Yes," chuckled John, this image of your typical Archeologist in the middle of a Archeological dig gently brushing dirt into a pan drifting through his mind's eye. "The brush and pan are deadly weapons. Who would have thought."

"Yahn? You already know that," teased Tali.

"Huh?" asked Garrus. He immediately suspected he was going to get a domestic story from the Tali and John Together collection.

"On Omega, our quarters we were staying in during the battle was so dirty I spent hours cleaning it up. Yahn didn't pay attention one day and walked right though my pile of dust I had yust worked twenty minutes to gather up. Of course it was flying all over the apartment in the air. I hit him over the head with the pan so hard he bled a little."

"Mental note," mused Garrus grinning, along with James and Kaiden.

"Do not come between Sparks and her cleaning, bro," finished James.

"Who would have thought our little Tali was so violent,' joked Kaiden.

"She does have a shotgun," answered Garrus. "Never forget that."

The team boarded the Normandy and John went to confer with Admiral Hackett. He had not been in favor of the diversion to Sanctuary. It was, in his opinion, too tenuous a lead and the demands of the Normandy on the rest of the war effort were far more concrete. But given the intel, Hackett had to admit he had been wrong on that count. Likewise, Liara had tracked Kai all the way to what they suspected was the main base of Cerberus. Hackett was ready to end Cerberus once and for all and gave John the green light for that operation.

That resolved, John proceeded down to Engineering to get a 'buck me up' from Tali. As it was already 1750 hours, he suspected she would still be down there as she frequently worked until she was ready to drop. The longer the war went on, the more she worked. It was something he had first seen in her during the time just before the treason trial on the Migrant Fleet. Hard work, hard sleep, and when she got up, she would frequently make love to him before breakfast. It was a routine, but one he was accommodating with. But she wasn't in engineering. So he went to the drinks lounge. And when he walked in, there she was, seated at the bar, by herself.

"Yahn!" She slurred as she noticed him standing by her. "Wanna drink? I'm toasting Miranda. . . I think."

"You think?" asked John.

"I wanted a drink (hics) and a big one," she persisted. "And I had to have a reason, but I've been having a hard time making up my mind. So that will do."

"What are you drinking?"

"Turian Brandy, triple filtered," she answered. "And introduced into the suit by means of an emeryency induction port."

"That's your Tali drinks tube that Aunt Raan gave you, Tali," observed John placing his right hand on her shoulder and briefly snuggling in.

"Emeryency Induction Port!" insisted Tali. She leaned into him as well. "The room sways every time I try to take a drink. I think that means it's working."

Tali paused for a moment. She looked up at John.

"I'm having a drink with my bond-mate. My Human bond-mate. My father would have hated you."

And then she giggled and hiccuped a bit more.

"She was so rude. What did Yack call her? Cerberus Cheerleader! With her Perfect Yeens and that Attitude. And still . . . she got it done! She stopped her father."

"I didn't realize this would be so hard on you," observed John.

"I didn't like her. Keelah, she was such a bitch. And she flaunted her body at you. But I respected her. Sometimes . . . that's better than liking. She did what ever it took to stop her father. She never gave in to him; never changhed herself to please him."

"Ah," sighed John. He gave her shoulders a bit of a scratch buff rub.

"Don't 'Ah' me," suggested Tali. "You sound like a Vorcha."

"Seeing a bit of yourself in Miranda fighting your father?" asked John.

"I spent my early life trying to live up to him," began Tali. "Then making up for his mistakes. Doing what he'd have wanted."

"It's never that easy," suggested John.

"When do we get to stop reacting to our parents and start living for ourselves?" she asked.

"The answer to that one is at the bottom of that glass," suggested John with a sigh. He had no clue either. But he suspected that the answer was never. After all, there was the all ever present threat of "When you grow up and have children of your own . . ." that suggested his and Tali's parents were or had been in on something that he and Tali were as of yet unaware.

"I might need help with the Induction Tube," suggested Tali looking up at him with her head a bit lopsided. A very clear signal that she had gotten herself quite drunk already. "Port . . . You know."

"Here's to Miranda," suggested John, pantomiming a raised glass.

"Nice yob, you yenetically perfect Cerberus cheerleader bosh'tet! Keelah Selai!"

John sat next to Tali, his arm around her shoulder as she finished her drink. And then he gently lead her up to their cabin and set her down on the bed so she could sleep it off. She giggled a bit and pulled at him and he removed her face plate and gave her a few moments of kisses before he excused himself.

"You are going?" she suggested, throwing her arms back over her head and stretching herself out.

"I'll be back shortly," he promised. "I still have things I have to do before I can retire, and I had not scheduled carrying my inebriated flirty wife back to the cabin. But I have penciled you into my schedule so provided you are still awake when I return, I will happily help you out of your suit while you get ready for bed."

"I hate waiting long," she threatened. "I might yust get ready by myself."

"Don't scare me like that," joked John. He left the cabin and proceeded to do his rounds.

When he got to Javik, he found Javik being irritated by Tali who was apparently finding things to do in order to keep awake until he got back.

"I heard about your talk with Liara," slurred Tali over the Comm. "You act so angry. But you really care about us *giggle*."

"I need you functional to destroy the Reapers!" insisted Javik. He probably was aware that John was standing at the door, but even so, his back remained facing John while he stared into a standing pool of water in front of him. Javik's sensory arrays were concentrated in his fingers to such an extent that he was constantly washing his hands to be able to sense new things. Thus he was always, when free, adjacent to water.

"You care about Liara," insisted Tali. "You like her." She said it in such a fashion that it suggested Garrus might have competition. John found it interesting that while she could not imagine being with any other guy except him, she could still speculate on the coupling of others.

"You are intoxicated," accused Javik. "A foolish risk given Quarian symbiotic physiology."

"And you like me too," continued Tali. Her change in tone now suggested that she was accusing Javik of being a sentimental old softy underneath his gruff exterior, something which John suspected would really annoy Javik.

"This conversation is OVER!" announced Javik. Yep, she had really gotten to him. John smiled as he walked up to Javik. That was his Tali, geeking out friends and associates with mind games. As he walked up, he noticed that Javik had been studying the schematics of the Normandy.

"Looks familiar," he said. The standard human technique of understatement.

"I've been studying this ship," replied Javik, also stating the obvious. "It's crew." Then he paused and began to reflect out loud. He wasn't saying anything he didn't already know, but it seemed as if he were thinking deeply about it for the first time. "There was a Normandy before this one. You died in an attack. But then you were resurrected to fight the Reapers."

"Maybe you and I have a thing or two in common," suggested John. He had been wondering for a while when Javik would make that link.

"But you have something else," continued Javik. "The reasons you fight are still alive . . . The friendships of the people around you . . . And more . . . You and the Quarian are joined."

"You could say that," answered John. "I love her deeply. She's what keeps me from falling apart under the stress of this whole horror story."

"I don't say that," replied Javik. "Your pheromones do. Are these the reasons why you wish to continued living? For their affection and love?"

"As I said," answered John. "Without that love and affection, all I have in my life right now, is death. And that is not enough." The power to destroy gave little in the way of satisfaction save when it was focused towards protection of that which deserved protection, and even then, it was a fleeting thing. And that which was destroyed always looked ugly afterwards. There was no beauty in death, even the death of Reaper soldiers.

"Yes," mused Javik.

"What about you?" asked John. "I respect your reasons for being here, but I get the feeling there's something more Javik.

Javik walked by a glowing shard which was overing over a single round plate. John had seen it before, but Javik had never referenced it.

"What is this?" he asked.

"It's called the echo shard," answered Javik. "Passed from soldier to soldier . . . Prothean to Prothean. Each adds their memories to it."

"Like a beacon," mused John. "How far back does it go?"

"To a time before the Reapers," answered Javik. "It is all that is left of my people."

"And you don't want to remember that?" asked John. He sensed that Javik was struggling, walking the fine line between despair and hope. Hope that this cycle would end the Reapers, despair that he would die fighting them, still in the throes of struggle.

"Imagine if everyone you knew was dead. You could not remember their faces, or the color of the sky above your home. The memories were gone. But so was the pain. Would you want to remember that Commander? Even if it meant watching everyone die again?"

"If I had something like this . . ." mused John. "Seeing Earth whole again? Everyone alive? Yes, it would be worth the pain." John had remembered the purpose of pain, why it existed. It was there to fix stupid, the only thing which some people could learn from. It was a hard teacher, a hard repair, a brutal drill sergeant. But like the drill sergeant, it kept people alive. So yes, the pain was worth it. The question was, would Javik have the courage?

He picked up the shard, and for a moment, he reflected on the wonders of Prothean civilization. There were geographic and architectural wonders he recalled. It sounded beautiful, and then . . . The Reapers came. Each second he held on, he saw more death and more destruction and suddenly, he threw the shard on the table.

"You okay?" asked John.

Javik reflected on a memory that had come back to him. Of his own ship, and his own crew, and friends among that crew. Of how they had been captured. How only he was able to escape while the rest of his crew was indoctrinated and then sent out to hunt him with his own ship. How finally he was able to kill them, and how he watched each one of them die just to make sure. And then reflected that war was an atrocity committed in the name of survival. A lesson he wished he had never learned.

John gave Javik a moment to recover, and then when Javik was okay, John left for his cabin.

Tali was laying upon the bed, asleep, and naked. John sighed and grinned to himself. He would not wake her. She needed the sleep, the stress on the team now was immense. The pressures of the Reapers were growing as the situation on Earth became increasingly desperate. John mused for a moment, putting on his sweat pants but leaving the shirt off. He let his gaze cross over her. She was looking rather ordinary by now. Gone were the unknown mysteries of her body. The things which had made undressing her so much fun, the bits that were exciting. In the end, it was just an ordinary body, sort of. She was after all, Quarian and for that reason, had a triangular foot with two long toes extending from it and a hand with two long fingers and an opposable thumb. It was, in the end, her hands, feet, and face which were still the most exotic thing about her. And he was glad about that, for those parts of her he would see the most of in his life. He got onto the bed next to Tali and took her in his arms. She snuggled up to him, whispered an "I love you" to him and promptly was asleep again. Oh well, maybe in the morning perhaps. He picked up her hand and gently held it. In her sleep she kept grabbing him, and he let her. He looked over her thin fingers, that thick curved fingernail. The gentle slightly purple cast to the skin tone and the soft feel of the skin. Part of him remained simply amazed that this was the woman he got to hold. This was the hand he was allowed to caress with his fingers. And not only did she allow him this liberty, but she loved the fact that he did so.

Javik was caught in his own dilemma John mused. For him there was nothing out there but death in the end, and for that reason, war for him was all about survival. How could he fight for justice when ultimately, there was no such thing for him? If there was no God, then there was no justice, for if it only existed in and of itself, justice was simply a sentient construct based upon a presumed rational, but often political, response to sentient evil. But what was worse, there were those who engaged in evil all their lives and got away with it. Aria was back on Omega, and the new gangs would rise and once again do their dirty dealing. The Talons might hold back the tide for a bit, but in the end, Aria's willingness to tolerate that would mean that some of those gang members would live out their days alive and wealthy. No matter how hard the work of C-sec and other law enforcement forces, some criminals would die of old age surrounded by their mistresses and sycophants. And the Reapers? For at least 200,000 years they had slaughtered their way across the galaxy, murdering and destroying everything, and taking what was left of life and transforming it into themselves. The ultimate ghouls or vampires, take your pick. And like the real folk tales of ghouls and vampires had it, as ugly as they were evil.

Javik had been forced to fight without hope, a hope he was still denying himself. John found it ironic that the existence of the Pits, beyond the walls of heaven, were what enabled him to keep himself sane, because what that said was that there was justice above and beyond the galaxy. It did not exist in and of itself, it had a source. But what if Javik had genuinely been right? Well then it would be the most ironic of universes where all sentient life had to live an illusion in order to be able to keep from falling into despair. Because in the end which universe did anyone really want to live in? A universe where there was a God who saw to it that all evil was punished in the end, and the good got to live forever with those whom they loved . . . Such as Tali in his arms right now . . . Or a universe where once Tali died, she was nothing but a rotting corpse with rapidly fading beauty, finally becoming nothing but bones and dirt, and when he died, there would be no way he could point a finger towards God and demand an answer for the brutality of the Reapers. The atheist view point was one of contradiction, you hated a being who did not exist for allowing evil, which itself could not exist, since it was only your personal opinion which called it such. And so Javik was reduced to fighting to survive and only that. There might be revenge in the end, but only if they won.

John continued to muse, as he listened to Tali's measured breathing beside him. He reflected on what EDI had said to him when she had been reflecting upon what she was learning about. She had seen film of humans struggling inside the Reaper processing camps, where slowly, bit by bit, the humans were methodically examined, assigned various jobs and duties, and worked until it was their time to be processed into the grey goo which would make up the Human like Reaper which was being built in London. She had observed where survival, living yet one more day should be the focus of every human there, yet, that was not the case. There were those who made sacrifices so that others might live, even when life was offered in exchange for cooperation, cooperation was denied. EDI had found it astonishing, but she had also found it preferable. "The Reapers," she said. "Are all about self-preservation." He had to admit, that in the end, that was all the Reapers were engaged in. Taking all life above a certain technological point and transforming it into the components for their own survival. And persuading themselves all the while that they were the pinnacle of enlightenment, who's thoughts were so beyond sentient comprehension. And yet, John reflected, all he had heard from them since he had first encountered Sovereign was lies, jingoes, jargon, and cliches. It was a sorry testimony to their own utter vacuousness that an ordinary soldier who merely had a brief overview of Jesuit education could hold his own intellectually against them.

He looked again at Tali's hand, raising it to his eyes, examining those long graceful fingers, just a bit thinner than a woman's fingers, yet stronger. He was so happy to have her. He had been very lucky so far. His mother was still alive, and he had Tali next to him. Joker was hoping his sister had escaped Tiptree, for Liara had informed him just a few hours ago that children from Tiptree had been arriving in shuttles at scattered Salarian colonies. So maybe he had only lost his father. That was the horrible frame of reference for him. Garrus had found his own family safely extracted from Palavan, but he was advising the Primarch that the only hope for the Turians now was to maintain the fleet in being for the Crucible. So while his family got to escape from Palavan, other families would not be so lucky if the Turians withdrew from Palavan and let the Reapers begin the pacification of that planet without fear of naval interference. There was of course, hope that the Rachni would be able to continue working their magic on Palavan as they had on Earth, but even so, there was never enough room for everyone and the Reapers were always looking for the tunnels.

Hanging on to hope. That was what everyone was reduced to. But hope was what you held on to, even when all seemed hopeless. What good was hope as a virtue, if there were still grounds for it? It was one of those paradoxes of the world. Hope was only a virtue when all was hopeless. Courage was only a virtue when death was certain. It was something that the Reapers would never understand. They saw the defiance in the eyes of the sentients they were putting into the processing tubes and they concluded that defiance was a worthless means of defense. It never dawned on them that the humans who were putting their own into those tubes (knowing that one day would come when they too would be joining them) were gaining a measure of determination and courage to continue to resist where they could.

As the Emperor Aurelian, one of the great Roman Emperors had noticed, the Christians had died in ranks in the coliseum. They had died like they were fighting a battle they knew they would win. He never was able to explain that to himself, and it amazed him. For he had been very well told that these were the deviants and dysfunctional of the Empire for whom right was wrong and black was white. Yet, they died like they were the one's who had something worth dying for. Who had sent him long rationally constructed defenses of their beliefs, explaining that crazy idea that God had chosen to become a human being and experience everything, even death by the most shameful and torturous way possible. John could sympathize with Aurelian. It did seem like a crazy idea. But for all the craziness of the ideas which Christianity espoused, they were not engaged in the behavior of the dysfunctional or deviant. But even so, the Roman Empire would continue to try to destroy the movement, even when, one hundred and fifty years later, it held the allegiance of over one third of the entire Empire's population. In the end, the Roman Empire simply exhausted itself trying to put the movement down. In the end, the Christians simply continued to choose death over denial until the Roman sword arm fell to the side, unable to gather sufficient strength to strike again. Christianity's strategy of death before denial had succeeded ever since. In the end, their enemies exhausted themselves to extinction trying to destroy the movement.

Did the Reapers have any clue that the entire population of the Earth had been trained for a day like this? Did the Reapers even notice that the humans were 'dying in ranks'? That this strategy of death before denial would mark the entirety of human and other sentient resistance?

John closed his eyes and began to drift into sleep. Then what seemed like a few moments later, though he knew it wasn't, he felt the caress of fingers on his face and opened his eyes to see a pair of pale white eyes looking back at him, the smell of a sweet sweat upon the skin, and the taste of a very sugary kiss. Such was Tali's body chemistry that she actually tasted a little sweet when he kissed her.

"I got ready for you Yahn," she whispered. "And then I fell asleep. Can I make it up to you now?"

"I would love you to," he said while looking into those luminous eyes of her, little sparkles reflecting the stars above, little sparkles . . . Shining Bright.


	35. Chapter 35 - Tali's Interview

September 4th, 2187. Tali looked up at the latest engineering calendar Ken had put up over the main console station where Adams normally worked from. On the Cerberus Normandy, the calendar had been illustrated by human women in brief garments wielding various engineering tools. Then he had started the relationship with Gabby and she had made such calendars verboten.

"I don't need the competition," she informed him. "So you be happy with me and only me."

"Yes dear," replied Ken, the eternal reply of the man who has been appropriately civilized.

The new calendar, or actually the one which had been up for a bit now, since it was September, was merely attractive women in work outfits wielding the tools. Some of them were actually possessing precisely placed grease smudges, as if they were actually working in outfits that clean and with hair and make up that in place.

She reflected on all the things which had happened in Septembers past. She had been rescued by her Yahn in September. And he had rescued her people in September. And now, he was in communications with Admiral Hackett, and they were preparing to rescue the Earth. But here in Engineering, she was trying to keep concentrating on the work in front of her while waiting for him to signal her that his conversation with Hackett was over with and he would want to talk about it with Garrus and Liara. Samantha would be there taking notes.

"Why do we always talk about these things with Garrus?" she had asked him.

"He's my best friend," answered John. "And he's been with me since the beginning, like you."

"But then why Liara?" persisted Tali.

"Because Garrus wants her to be there and I won't say no to him now will I?" replied John. "Otherwise, she would be like Kaiden, most trusted, but wasn't there for the Collector Missions."

"Ah," mused Tali.

"Don't you 'Ah' me," joked John. "You sound like a Vorcha."

"I do not!" protested Tali. "Where did you get that idea from?"

"You don't remember?"

"Remember what?"

"I guess you don't, you Tali Duck you."

"Yahn!"

"I know something you don't know! Nyah Nyah Nyah Nee Nyah Nyah!"

And then the pillow fight began. As usual she proved way more springy and energetic at it that he did and she wore him out in the end. He finally told her that she had said that to him a couple of nights prior while she was toasting Miranda. It was one of those fuzzy evenings which suggested she had, as often as she had in the past, drunk a bit more than she ought to have.

She sighed recollecting. She simply enjoyed the floaty feeling she got when she was drunk. It reminded her of what it felt like when John was making love to her and she was ready to climax. Being drunk wasn't as intense of course, but it lasted longer. Problem was she woke up the next morning with a headache. She didn't do that after making love. She woke up after making love with a warm snuggly feeling. Maybe she shouldn't drink so much? But it tasted so good, especially when she was stressed out.

Now what was it she was supposed to be doing with the engine heat sinks? She reviewed the matter, asked Ken an 'aside' question to help her recollect and then remembered to open up the side heat vents to take the pressure off of the sinks as they were getting hot enough that they might misshape and that would disperse the heat to the hull. A hot hull would show up on the infrared scanners almost as good as the exhaust would. No stealth if you can sense the ship's heat.

She got a beep on her Omni-tool. She opened it up and Diana Allers was asking for an interview. She paused. Well if John signaled her she could excuse herself. If something really got her involved in engineering, she would be hard pressed to break off.

"Adams?"

"Yes Tali?"

"Diana has been bugging me for an interview for forever. I am going to give it now. Watch over things for me will you?"

"Sure thing Tali. That vent issue with the heat sinks you just resolved should keep the ship running smoothly for at least a few hours. Barring any more gremlins," he answered.

"Nasty little buggers that they are," added Ken.

"She wasn't talking to you!" objected Gabby.

"But she was talking about Gremlins, and everyone gets to talk about Gremlins," retorted Ken.

Tali had no clue what Gremlins were. She had heard them mentioned on occasion as the reason why things went wrong with the engine, but her omni-tool suggested they were some form of sentient life form found in human folk tales and she was certain that such a thing could not possibly exist. It made no sense for a creature to live on a ship and derive it's satisfaction by destroying that ship, thus guaranteeing it's own demise should it prove successful enough.

It was those 'folk tales' which she found so confusing. She wasn't sure where the facts ended and fictions begun. Take the Jackalope for example. It was a rodent with long floppy ears that had a set of very sharp antlers upon it's head. She had actually seen one of those. One of the Normandy's original crew members was from a place called Texas and he had mounted one on a wood and rock platform which he had set up in his cabin. He had described in many a session his numerous battles with it before he had finally brought it down. She suspected the tales of his struggles to bag the creature were mostly exaggerations, but she couldn't deny that the creature did exist. If it were a 'folk tale' then why had it's body been preserved and posed by a skilled 'taxidermist' (another one of those curious human words she had no Khelish equivalent for).

She took the elevator down, musing on Garrus' jokes about Citadel elevators and proceeded to Diana's 'studio'. It was one of the Cerberus Cargo bays. Zaeed had hung out there during the Collector Missions. Since then Diana had transformed one of the sections into a very nice little 'set' where you could stand and answer questions, or sit behind a backdrop which looked like a living room or office wall and be relaxed. When she walked in, her suit transferred the scent of tea brewing. And not just any tea, but a very thick dextro tea which was only now being discovered and harvested on Rannoch. One of the 'rediscoveries' which the Quarians were making now that they were back on their home world. She didn't know if she liked it or not but it was a reminder of her home world and what's more, it was from there. So it was 'precious' to her at least on a subtle psychological level. Something from home.

"I hope you like the Rannoch coffee," suggested Diana. Motioning for Tali to sit down on the couch at the spot marked with a big white circle. She brought over the pot and two cups on a tray with what Tali suspected was dextro sugar and creamer.

"I hope I will," answered Tali. "It was sweet of you to make it."

"Speaking of sweat! I'm amazed at it's taste," observed Diana. "It's so sweet already. I had to pour in a lot of milk just to have a cup of it so I didn't feel like I was gaining weight by sipping it."

"Doesn't taste that sweet to me, in fact it tastes a little bitter," replied Tali. "But Yahn has told me that dextro food tastes very sweet to levo. And for me? Levo food is really tart or bitter."

"Well," mused Diana as she checked her omni-tool. "Looks like the camera has focused in on you. You think we can do this with you unmasked? There are a lot of misconceptions about Quarians and if the viewers could see your face."

"Oh I don't know about that," reacted Tali, suddenly feeling the need to cover her visor with her palms. "But I can't really. I'm only just now finally acclimating back to the Captain's cabin and there's a lot of new stuff here which would give me a horrible reaction after about three minutes."

Diana smiled in a manner which Tali suspected was geared to put her at ease. "It's okay Tali, I understand. But does Commander Shepherd see your face often?"

"As often as I can let him," she replied.

"Does he think you're attractive?"

Tali felt both thrilled and embarrassed at the same time.

"He seems to think so," she giggled. "He says I'm very pretty. He likes my eyes and often plays with my fingers."

Diana's expression was along the lines of 'Lot's of human interest potential here' and the interview began in earnest.

Tali lost track of the time, she enjoyed her Rannoch coffee, and began to get rather animated at points, not suspecting that Diana was actually encouraging her gestures and postures all the while. While one set of questions have already been recalled, several other questions stand out besides her Scary Krogan In The Mako story, in part because Tali, once she began to catch on to Diana's overall questioning, began to have 'fun' with her. Diana, unable to see Tali's expressions, had no clue as to what Tali was up to. Suffice to say . . .

"So what was your first impression of Commander Shepherd?" began Diana.

"He was dirty and rough and I was worried I would get infected yust by having him breath in my presence, him and Kaidan and . . . Ashley. The three of them had me worried."

"But didn't your suit protect you from that sort of thing?"

"My filters on it were old and needing replacing. I was accordingly concerned."

"So you didn't think he was good looking?"

"Oh not at all. I thought Garrus looked better at first."

"Garrus?"

"Yes, he was way more poised. Then he opened his mouth, sugyested he was one really cool guy, and the mayic was gone. Works on other girls, at least on Liara, but not for me."

"So it wasn't love at first sight?"

"Not in the least, especially during N7 Drill. Oh he looked so horrible! I mean I wanted to throw up more than a few times."

"So how did you ever manage to fall in love with him?"

"It wasn't easy, but it was little things that built up over time. He took my side when someone was being nasty to me in drill . . ."

"Who?"

"I'd rather not say."

Diana nodded. "But you were saying . . ."

"He wanted to know about who I was, and why I did what I did. And he appreciated what I was able to do. And that was something I had never experienced before. And then . . . I realized he had these incredible eyes, green and glimmering. And if I could look at those, I didn't find his face so . . . unsettling."

"Is he still somewhat unattractive?"

"Not any more. He works at keeping his face clean and that really goes a long way. But in the end, he's yust such a good person, I can't stop being in love with him."

"So when did you realize you were in love with him?"

"Right after singing Yingle Bells."

"So it was Christmas?"

"No I was madly in love with him by Christmas, it was driving back from Peak 15 in a blizzard two months prior."

"You were singing Jingle Bells in . . ."

"October."

"Why?"

"It was snowing and it was annoying Yahn so naturally we couldn't stop."

"You were deliberately annoying your commanding officer?"

"Well of course, doesn't everyone?"

"Well you've already told me about the most frightening experience you had in your many missions. So tell me, what was the most frightening enemy you faced?"

"The little Rachni, they remind me of spiders and they scuttle right towards you, I . . ." and Tali shuddered.

"You don't like spiders?"

"I _hate_ spiders."

"But they're such little things . . ."

"And I couldn't kill them fast enough."

"Okay then, I would have thought something else would have been more frightening for you. So lets look at what has become known as The Suicide Mission. Where you ever worried then?"

"Before we were on it, yes, I was in a panic."

"But not during?"

"Once we got a feel for what we were up against, it was much more managhable. You see, I was afraid I would die before I got to make love to Yahn and that was torture."

"I take it that's no longer an issue?"

"We've managhed a couple of times to resolve that fear."

"A couple?"

"At least. Maybe once or twice more; don't really count those things."

"Why do I get the impression you are grinning under that mask?"

"Diana? I have no idea why you have that impression."

"So after Commander Shepherd who's your best friend?"

"I can't tell you. She likes it that no one knows who she is."

"You can't tell me?"

"Nope."

"Even me?"

"You're a Reporter, Diana. Especially not you. And EDI knows better than to tell too."

"That is correct, Tali," replied EDI over her speaker comm.

"Okay? Who's your second best friend?"

"That's kind of tough. I like Garrus and Liara both. Liara was really sweet to me on the first Normandy but she also had a crush on Commander Shepherd and I was terrified he would fall in love with her first. Then she became an information broker and now she's way more 'in chargh'. She's changhed, for the better of course, but even so, she's getting way bigger. Garrus remains just Garrus, like Yahn. So I kind of think of him as my big brother. And we can share drinks together. And after a few drinks, he kind of actually becomes the cool guy he thinks he is."

"I notice you refer to Commander Shepherd as Yahn, is there a reason for that?"

"Yes, when he first let me know he loved me, he told me to call him Yahn, so that's what I call him."

"Why Yahn and not John?"

"Well for starters Yohn is not his name, it's Yahn. And it was Yahn that he wanted me to call him."

"Okaaay." Diana paused. "Does he have any names he calls you?"

"Oh piles, there's Tali Duck, Monkey Duck, Ducky, Kitten, and Jail Bait."

" . . . Jail Bait?"

"Yes. Silly name I know, but he referenced it a bunch. Not so much lately, especially not since my last birthday anyway."

"Um . . . Why did he start calling you that?"

"When I told him how old I was."

"Tali? How old are you?"

"Well you're not supposed to ask that sort of question and I'm not supposed to tell now right?"

"Umm . . Right . . . So when are you two getting married?"

"Almost two years ago," answered Tali.

"In two . . .wait! Are you saying you've been married for almost two years?"

"Yeah, that was why I was so panicked before the Suicide Mission, our wedding was three days after we attacked the Collector Base, it was the first night that I was fully acclimated with Yahn."

"So what sort of ceremony was it? What was it like?"

"I really can't say. You see, it's something that the couple is supposed to do together in Quarian custom. And Yahn slept through it. In fact he didn't wake up until several hours after it was supposed to be over."

"He slept through his wedding?"

"Pretty much. Can't say I blame him given the circumstances."

"Was he drunk? Was he that bored?"

"No, he was drugged."

"Drugged? You drugged Commander Shepherd before you married him?"

"No I didn't, that was Dr. Chakwas."

"Why did Dr. Chakwas drug Commander Shepherd before his own wedding."

"She was firmly convinced he needed it."

"Was he nervous?"

"No he was very relaxed. The drug, it was a sedative."

"No I mean before he was given the sedative."

"Still very relaxed. There was a prior sedative."

"Tali? Just how many sedatives did Dr. Chakwas give him?"

"You would have to ask her, I was too busy with Engineering issues during those three days prior."

"He was drugged a whole three days before the wedding?"

"Yeah, I guess that would be about right."

"He slept through your wedding and you still love him?"

"Well he has tried to make it up to me, I mean he introduced me to the idea of a wedding anniversary."

"Oh? What did you do for your first anniversary then?"

"He took me to Ryuusei Sushi in the Silversun Ward. It was very nice and he purchased a new outfit for me to wear before we went."

"Ryuusei's Sushi? I've heard that is a really fancy restaurant. Not even I've been able to get in there. That is so sweet. So what was the restaurant like?"

"I can't really say. We were not in there that long before he broke their floor."

"He broke their floor?"

"And killed all their fish. We couldn't eat there after that. So we met in a used car lot and with Wrex, shot the place up after the Volus Manager told us to leave."

"You shot up a Used Sky-car lot with Wrex?"

"Yeah Urdnot Wrex? He's the Krogan who rules Tuchanka."

"Okay, so for your first anniversary, Commander Shepherd and you go to Ryuusei's Sushi and break their floor, kill their fish, then meet up with the Krogan Lord of Tuchanka and shoot up a used Sky-car lot."

"That sums it up nicely," concluded Tali. "It wasn't the most romantic evenings, but you really can't blame Yahn, he tries really hard to be a good man. Yust sometimes the circumstances get the better of him."

"Do the circumstances get the better of him often?"

"Not that often. Now there was that time when he had to share top billing with the Blasto movie star and he and Yavik shot up the set. And then there was the time in the archives where the whole team helped him destroy a ton of historical artifacts over a case of mistaken identities. Usually this sort of stuff only happens on the Citadel. Never on a mission."

"Tali?" began Diana. "This is getting a little hard to believe."

"There's nothing I've told you that can't be confirmed by news reports of the past year," insisted Tali. She pulled up her Omni-tool and started showing the reports of the destruction of Ryuusei's Sushi and the Uncle Holus the Volus's Used Sky-Car Emporium from the prior year. As Diana was rendered speechless by this sudden confirmation her ears picked up the struggles at suppressed laughter coming from around the corner and then John walked in still chuckling.

"Okay Tali, I think we've tortured Diana enough," he said.

"So what she's been telling me is a bunch of tall tales?" queried Diana, frowning.

"No Diana," replied John. "Tali's a smart girl. What she's told you is the truth. And she's told you nothing but the truth. But what she hasn't told you is the whole truth. She's been leaving out little details."

Diana turned to Tali, but as usual could make out no expressions behind that tinted mask.

"You have to admit Diana, it makes a much more interesting telling when you leave out the battle inyuries which was why he was sedated after the Suicide Mission and the shoot outs in the citadel were with CAT6 during the time. Or the fact that Quarians mature at 10 and are regarded as full adults at 14, as opposed to humans."

"Yes," admitted Diana. "It does, but I don't know if you were aware at how important these interviews are for the war effort."

Tali shrugged. "I was having fun," she suggested. "And you looked more animated than you have been in a while. So I thought you were being entertained as well."

Diana sighed. "Tali?" She said. "If I had been looking to smear you like other reporters, you were giving me everything I could have asked for. But can we go back some other time and fill in those detail so that the Commander and his Quarian wife come out looking like great heroes instead of social misfits with a psychotic killing streak?"

"Well this was really nice coufric," she observed pointing to the tube of dextro 'coffee' she had been drinking during the interview. "So when I'm done with Yahn, I'll be back and we can work out the details okay?"

Diana nodded and Tali and John walked out of the studio and up to the drinks lounge.

"So how did the talk with Hackett and Anderson go?" asked Tali. "It was a very long discussion."

"It was fraught with peril," answered John. "We're concerned. While the influx of Asari engineers and scientists to the Crucible project have really sped things up, making it's completion in perhaps a month possible . . ."

"A month? That soon? The last time we talked we were talking another six months!" observed Tali.

"The Asari are pouring everything they've got now into the Crucible," answered John. "They understand now that their entire civilization is hanging on it's completion and so they are putting everything else secondary. And with the Salarians realizing that they are probably next, and probably within months, they too are throwing everything they can into the project because unlike the Asari, the Salarians know they don't have the means to fight the Reapers."

"I would think that's good news," replied Tali.

"On one hand it is," sighed John. "But this is war, and in war, nothing is for certain. You see, the moment we attack Cerberus, that probably signals to the Reapers that we know Cerberus has the Catalyst secret."

"Why?" asked Tali. She walked behind the bar, and got out the Tali and John drinking tubes, and poured a shot of whiskey into John's glass, and then filled the rest with soda water. She handed it to him and he took a drink. She then opened a cupboard which said, "Garrus' Secret Stash" and took out a bottle of Muskwin and filled her own tube with it, and clipped it to her mouthpiece on the suit. "I mean," she continued. "Tim has not been sharing any secrets with the Reapers has he?"

"No," replied John. "He would not, at least at first. Once the indoctrination reached a certain point, he might do so justifying that it would lull the Reapers into a false sense of security and give us more to have to deal with while his own 'secret' plans for takeover proceeded. But the problem is that once you are indoctrinated yourself, you become extremely incompetent when it comes to selecting co-workers on the basis of their security risk."

"So you are pretty sure Cerberus has indoctrinated ayents working inside?"

"It's a sure bet," answered John. "So if Cerberus has the Catalyst secret, the Reapers know it."

"So since Tim is clearly indoctrinated, why would the Reapers not persuade him to destroy that information?"

"At some point they will be able to," answered John. "Or they'll have an agent do it for them who's already inside. But for Tim, information is the source of his power. It's the thing that makes him what he is. He won't willingly part with any of it. Chances are that's how he got indoctrinated. Some piece of Reaper technology with nano-bots on it that infected him as he studied it. At least that was Mordin's theory. Mordin took samples from the Reaper, and as he studied them he realized he was beginning to experience the symptoms himself. So he ran tests on himself and found he was infected with the nanobots. That was how he was able to develop the inoculation. It's a set of counter nanobots who hunt out and destroy Reaper nanobots."

"Yahn! The risks he was taking!"

"He was Salarian Special Opts, Tali. He took risks like that routinely. He told me when we were on Tuchanka. It's why his serum is so effective, it's geared to destroy the Reaper nanobots as opposed to counter indoctrinate. Accordingly it is easier to make it a cross species inoculation. But there was one other thing about Reaper technology that makes his serum so essential."

"What's that?" Tali was still behind the bar, leaning on it with her arms looking straight into John's face. He could, as usual, make out her eyes and outline of her nose. He smiled and she nodded her head for a second shyly. Then looked back up at him.

"The Reaper nanobots are on every single piece of Reaper technology. Or rather, there are a series of them which all work in tandem keeping Reaper technology and each other functional. Thus, there is nothing which the Reapers make that is not, in some sense, dangerous to handle or study. Eventually, no matter what you are doing with Reaper technology, you end up becoming infected and thus beginning to succumb to the thrall of indoctrination." John mused for a second. "It's like . . . Like the One Ring in Tolkien. To even touch it was to risk being seduced by the evil in the ring."

"So the only intelliyent response to any Reaper technologhy is to destroy it," concluded Tali.

"Yes, which flies in the face of every single scientific rule we know. Which is why they are so dangerous. If you know how they fight and with what they fight you, you can, in theory, turn their own tools against them. But if you try to do that, you only end up being turned into more of their own tools. It's so insidious, and cunning."

"So once Tim started studying the Reaper's technologhy in order to learn how to control them . . ."

"He became indoctrinated," concluded John. "Of course it was easier for him since the psychological component of indoctrination is the promise of godhead. You know Tali, I bet the Protheans who started out trying to 'control' the Reapers likewise started out determined to control them. It was only after they tried to learn about Reaper technology that they no doubt began to become indoctrinated to the point where they became more determined to destroy the Crucible. No doubt by persuading themselves that the Crucible was the more 'crude' and 'brutal' approach."

"Which is why the Reaper attack on Sanctuary was of such little consequence, and had Lawson not had his daughters trying to sabotagh him, he could have rebuilt," speculated Tali. "Why stop Cerberus from finding out about how you indoctrinate when you are indoctrinating them while they are doing it?"

"Precisely," replied John. "Once Tim made the choice to dominate the Reapers, he set himself up for domination. It was a guaranteed sure thing. And that in part accounts for the Reaper's confidence. They know just enough about sentients that they've covered every presumed angle, save one."

"Which one?" asked Tali.

"The saint," replied John. "Of which there are precious few."

"What's a saint Yahn?"

"Any being who has died and gone to heaven. That's the point Tali. Because I have died and gone to heaven, I've experienced perfection. I can't maintain it here right now, which was part of the sacrifice I had to make. And it's perhaps the most painful thing I've got to endure. That failure to make the right decision at each juncture." He sighed. "But because I experienced that, I was able to immediately sense, starting with the Collectors, that there was something dangerous about the technology and it had to be destroyed, Otherwise my behavior makes no sense. You don't blame murders on the pistols or rifles or knives used to commit them. Technology is morally neutral. Its what you do with it that determines the rightness or wrongness. And that is of the action not the technology itself. A pistol used to kill an innocent child is an evil action. A pistol used to send a rapist running from your daughter before he can do the deed is a good action. But I knew, on the Collector base I knew, it had to be destroyed. Which is no doubt why Tim was so annoyed. I was being totally irrational about it."

"So the Reaper's secret is that they've . . . poisoned or infected . . . their technologhy," reflected Tali. "Yahn, you are so right. It is insidious and something that no one would be able to sense at first. Would we have been able to catch it at all if Saren hadn't warned us about it?"

"Probably not," replied John. "Saren was a Specter first and foremost. He hated humans, but he wasn't going to compromise the council by that hatred. So once I was a Specter, he tried to reason with me about it. And in so doing told me the one thing I needed to know in order to get to this point, indoctrination happens. That knowledge, caused us to look in a direction no one else would have looked at that juncture. The Protheans had no warning of indoctrination until after they were already compromised, Javik had no chance to find a means to thwart it. We did."

"You know," she mused. "It was the destruction of Sovereign at the Citadel which has given us this fighting chance Yahn. If Sovereign had succeeded, we would know none of this."

"No, not really," sighed John. "That was probably the decisive battle in this whole war, presuming we're going to win it."

"But there's something else Yahn," continued Tali. "If Cerberus is compromised to the level we think it is, then the Reapers know we are building the Crucible. They know we will come for Cerberus because we have to in order to know what the Catalyst is. There is no way we can achieve surprise on the Reapers by this action. How can we worry about what they will do if we attack Cerberus. They already know we are going to do it?"

"Hackett is afraid we'll reveal how close we are to completion of the Crucible if we attack Cerberus so he thinks we need to wait until it's done."

"Yahn? If you need information eventually, you don't wait to acquire it at the need to know moment. That's how we lost the information in the first place. The Asari would not tell us once we started working on the Crucible, even though they knew shortly we would need that information."

John seemed to think for a moment, directly looking into Tali's eyes. She simply looked back and smiled at him, though he could not see the smile.

"Tali you are so right!" he exclaimed. "We need to move now, the only delay we want is that time needed to get overwhelming force to the Cerberus Base and then hit them so hard they stay down."

"A little delay might also cause Tim to conclude that they dealt with the tracer soon enough to protect them as well," suggested Tali. "He's not a military commander, he might not realize that his smartest move at this point, would be to move his entire base of operations simply because Kai had that tracer on him."

"Of course Kai might not have bothered to tell him about the tracer either," replied John. "When you are working that deep in the bowels of the enemy, addressing your failures publicly with your boss is a very unsure thing."

He once again looked at Tali, smiling. She suddenly found that he looked . . . nice. Almost handsome. It was a strange phenomena. She could clearly remember when she didn't think he looked nice at all. But now he was pleasing to look at. She walked around the bar and up to him, removed her visor and gave him a little kiss and clamped it back on.

"Well now I need to get back to Diana and straighten out all the fun stuff I told her last hour."

"Yeah," chuckled John. "Suggesting you had to drug me in order to marry me was a good one though."

"Not me, Karin," replied Tali.

"But likewise I need to get back on the com with Hackett and let him know what our analysis of the situation is. He's a good admiral, he'll agree I'm certain. Thanks Tali. I needed this talked about. And who better than the woman I'm in love with?"

"I love you too Yahn."

That evening, after Tali had finished with Diana, she regaled John with the entire interview as they lay in bed together. They giggled and snickered through it all, John in particular laughing when she told him about her reference to Jail Bait. Then they made love and fell asleep. The next few days were going to be a frenzy of activity and planning.

September 20th, 2187 was a day of historical significance. It was the first operation that the United Species performed in complete cooperation with each other. Admiral Hackett and Commander Shepherd both insisted that it was necessary that the united fleets and armies fight this one together. It would provide coordination for future operations. It would likewise send a clear message to the Reapers, namely that they were opposed by the entire galaxy.

Cerberus, true to John's estimates, never knew what hit them. At 0600 local time, the United Species ships suddenly flew into the Anadius system and went straight for the Cronos Station. The base was hit on several fronts which kept Cerberus troops inside tied down. True to John's estimations, they were a decent enough fighting force, but they had been taken by surprise. No one on the base it seems, had anticipated the attack. But when they finally got to Tim's office, he was there, in image, to greet them. After expressing annoyance over John sitting in his chair, he proceeded to get into an argument with John. The argument was the standard one they had had before. Tim for the employment of the technology against them, John countering that indoctrination was inherent in the very technology itself. Tim seemed to not hear that. He left with the warning that John was not to overstay his welcome. Shortly thereafter, Kai Leng showed up and there was one last fight between the two of them before Kai was finally killed.

Then they were finally able to secure a conversation with the Prothean VI. And they discovered three things. The first was that the Catalyst was the Citadel. The second was that while they had been engaged in defeating Cerberus, the Reapers had seized the Citadel and moved it to Earth, and third, what had alerted the Reapers to this move by the United Species was Tim himself, who had directly flown to the Reapers and given them the information the moment he realized that Kai had been bugged.

"Well," sighed John in his after action report to Hackett. "It looks as if once they knew we were going to find out what the Catalyst was, they took it. I was wondering why they hadn't bothered prior. It's not as if we could have ever stopped them."

"It was easier since all our focus was on Cerberus. The Reapers had to have been picking up on the disposition of our forces these past two weeks. As you might have expected, they knew we were planning on hitting Cerberus. But at least the Council escaped in the Ascension. Little else did I fear," replied Hackett.

"We need to get there," concluded John.

"We do have one advantage," answered Hackett. "You can't shut something up that large easily, especially when your maintenance crew has been repurposed to sabotage your efforts to control it. We owe the Protheans for that little operation. No matter how good the Reapers are, it will take them time to repurpose the Citadel. And finally, they value the organics as the raw materials for their own reproduction. I suspect a lot of the residents of the Citadel are still alive, though they won't stay that way for long. If we move fast enough . . ."

"Can we move fast enough?" asked John.

"From what the last reports are, the Crucible is nearly complete, within hours of it's first test runs. We'll know in two days maximum if it's fully operational or not. And then we just have to get it to the Citadel. We've had plenty of experience fighting the Reapers this past year, and all the fleets will be gathering, along with all troops not yet tried down on Human, Turian, and Asari planets presently under assault by the Reapers. We know they will charge right at us, so pulling them from around the Citadel will be a piece of cake. We simply swing the Crucible around the flank and stick it on and we're set."

"Shucks we've won it already," observed John in an ironic tone.

"Of course it sounds like it will be that easy to implement," replied Hackett. "I suspect that the Leviathans, Inusannon, and Protheans were just as confidant before some of their battles too. And yet the Reapers took them out in the end."

"They didn't have the history we have," replied John. "And not just the Prothean history, our own. The Reapers have never had to face a race which played out Reaper strategy time and time again in our history, from the delusions of Godhead to the methodical slaughter of our own kind for the most brutal and foul reasons."

"Yeah," observed Hackett. "We're playing out battles and wars we've played out before. Some of this stuff even reminds me of what my grandfather said about his experiences in the Black Russian Crusade. Anderson's reports on the camps around London, and Grandpa's reports of the camps in the Dakotas, it's the same thing. But Shepherd? My Grandfather had stories his grandfather had told him about this place in Europe called Auschwitz, and what was done there. Every third generation Commander! Did my Grandfather's Grandfather have a Grandfather who had stories similar about some other place? Will we ever learn?"

"At least this time it's not us," observed John.

"True," replied Hackett. "Maybe this will all break us of that bad habit."

"At least for a few generations," answered John. "Pain and suffering always fix a lot of stupid in us."

"After this we're going to be geniuses," groaned Hackett. "But it's as good an answer as any. Hackett out."

"Poor Yimmy," sighed Tali that night as they lay in bed together. She turned her head to look at John's face, which was staring right up at the ceiling. Reaching out she caressed his chin, somewhat rough from the twelve hour growth of beard.

"Jimmy?"

"Yames Vega," replied Tali. "He's worried sick about Myra. She was being held in C-sec you know."

"Yeah," relied John with a sigh. "How many more people are going to lose those they care about?"

Suddenly Tali became frightened. She clung to John as tightly as she could.

"It's okay Kitten," he whispered. "It's okay."

And for the next ten minutes, Tali just cried.

"Why me?" she sniffled. "Why am I still happy? Everyone is dying and suffering around me and I'm . . . I'm so happy . . . Why should I be happy? Why do I still have you?"

John just held her. He didn't say anything. But she really wasn't looking for an answer. For what answer was there? So she just let him hold her and got all the stress and grief out of her. Each new blow by the Reapers was a tear to the heart. She didn't understand. Why should she be able to know that Rannoch was still safe when Earth, Palavan, and Thessia were burning. Why were the Quarians able to rebuild while the Reapers tore down the Humans, Turians, and Asari? The death and destruction around her kept her terrified that it was all a dream and she would wake up to a corpse of John, and her home world in flames, or worse, her back on the Migrant Fleet, slowly starving to death as one by one, the places they could get food from were destroyed by the Reapers.

She looked up at John's face. He remained looking up through the window. What was he thinking? He then turned to face her and gently wiped the tears from her face.

"Every moment with you," he said. "Is precious to me."

That meant so much to her. She sniffled once more and snuggled back up to him.

"I love you so much Yahn," she whispered back.

They did not make love that night. It was far more important that they hang on to each other. When John began to shake in his sleep, Tali was there to gently hold him and he settled down. When she began to weep later on, he was there to whisper comfort to her. And that was how they passed that night. They knew, indeed the whole ship knew, that the final defining battle was rapidly approaching. That this struggle to take back the Citadel would determine the success or failure of this cycles harvest.

The next morning they woke up, somewhat groggy for neither of them had gotten much sleep. They looked at each other as they mentally prepared themselves to get out of the bed and start the process of going to work.

"I had that nightmare again last night, but . . . There was a change."

"What it good?" asked Tali.

"I don't know," sighed John. "Last night I caught the child, or rather, my . . . clone caught him. And then the two of them were engulfed in the flames."

Tali looked at him. She didn't like the implications.

"I'm going to have to go through fire, Tali. I'm going to have to hurt a lot before this is over with. I have to have . . . courage. But also . . . I have to be prepared. The child isn't just someone I was not able to save," John paused and looked at her. "The child is a trap. Something about this whole dream seems to suggest that somehow, that child is going to be a deadly trap for me."

"How?" asked Tali. This made no sense to her. Her first impulse was to conclude that John would die, trying to save people.

John looked at her for a moment. And then he smiled.

"Let's just say I've learned to read between the lines these last two years."

"So, it's going to happen," she whispered quietly. "We're going to fight the final battle."

"Pretty much," said John. "We win or lose in the next few days."

"Yahn?" she asked. She kept looking at him, hoping so to see some certainty in his face as they got dressed, she in her suit and he in his armor. "What happens if we lose?"

John sighed. "The Geth are already working out the schematics for a Dyson sphere in the Collector Base System. The scrap there will be sufficient to get it entirely built, only a few things will need to be shipped in. Our job, you and me and the Normandy, will be to protect the secrecy of it to our dying days. We will live . . . and die . . . on this ship."

If John was expecting to see Tali panic, he was disappointed. She merely sighed.

"I was born on a ship, dying on a ship won't be a trayedy. But Rannoch . . . Poor Rannoch. To have our home world, and then lose it again."

John smiled. "In five hundred years, after the Reapers have left for deep space, it will be waiting for your descendants."

"True," she said. She looked at him. He looked back. "Yahn . . ." she said.

"Tali?" He replied.

"I yust wanted to say your name," she answered. "So the plans are already in motion?"

"They have to be," sighed John. "The Asari councilor insisted upon it. Once it was clear that Thessia was doomed, the entire Asari government began to focus on the what if, after the Crucible. They've pretty much got everyone on board. The only thing about it I find irritating is that every single one of those damned politicians who were fighting me from Saren on, is going to be living on that Dyson sphere. They won't be exempting themselves. Oh no . . ."

"But wouldn't they also be offering us a spot?" asked Tali.

"If they are thinking of it, they haven't mentioned it," replied John. "Not that it would surprise me. You have to remember Tali. I'm the one who was prophesying doom. Prophets are hated by the ruling class, before their prophecies come to pass, but especially after. Then is when most prophets get murdered."

Tali walked over to John and placed her hand upon his face. She looked up into his eyes. "My poor poor Yahn," she whispered. "You carry so much and yet, you never falter."

When John reported to the Com Center, Admiral Hackett was there to convey the next stage of the operation. The first tests on the Crucible were looking good, so the fleets would begin to assemble. There would be a council of war in Salarian Space, every single fleet would be concentrating there, within a three day cruise to the Mass Relay which would link them up to the chain of Relays which would end at Earth. John reflected how easy it was to hide something in space. While the Reapers knew that their foes were concentrating their forces, and likewise, suspected they knew what the target was, they had no idea when or where the fleet would assemble or how quickly it would materialize.

But likewise, as was so often the case in the war, the Reapers seemed to be slow to make adjustments. It was one of those most helpful, yet fascinating qualities of their psychology. On one hand, by concentrating their entire force at Earth, they would guarantee that the Allied Fleets would never be able to succeed simply because the strength of the Reapers was such that there would be insufficient time before the fleets were destroyed. On the other hand, to do such would be to admit that the Allied Fleets actually constituted a threat, and that was something the Reapers persistently refused to accept. It was more to the Allies advantage than the Reapers suspected, in part because the Reapers did not know the full disposition of the Allied Fleets. On they had pretty good guesses, but again, thanks to Mordin's inoculation serum, the Reapers were not able to indoctrinate as effectively as they had in the past. They could not count on treachery like they had in the past. There had been a classic moment where the Reapers, fully in control of all of Earth's major cities, had sent out broadcasts requesting that the world's Parliament come for peace negotiations. The delegation had been sent, after being inoculated, and went straight into the bowels of Harbinger. For several days, the politicians sent out reports dutifully talking about the hopes of peace (as was their wont) and then one day, there were no more reports. And then the Reapers proceeded to start once again on the offensive. No one ever saw the politicians again. When it became clear that they were not succumbing to the indoctrination, the Reapers had simply killed and processed them. This little act of complete and total disrespect (not to mention treachery) on the part of Harbinger, sobered up Earth's Parliament as nothing else ever had. From that point on, there would be no peace negotiations.

So as the Normandy began the three day cruise to the gathering point for the first and final offensive of the allied fleets, he reflected on the full story. The Reapers knew they were coming, but not when and with how much. There would be a response, but it would not be total. That was the only edge that the Allied Fleets had.

But would it be edge enough?


	36. Chapter 36 - A United Fleet

Salarian Space, outside of a solar system which remained untouched by Reapers so far. And as far as the eye could see the glinting of starlight off the hulls of thousands nay tens of thousands of ships. It was the 4th of October in the year 2187.

They were on the shuttle heading for the Ascension, where the council would take place. For the first time in his life he would be on an Asari Dreadnought. Not just any great ship, but the greatest ship in the United Species fleet. He was with Tali, and she was holding on to his arm and leaning on him as they came up to the ship. With him as well was Liara and Garrus, both representing their respective races on Team Normandy. Behind them was Samantha Traynor who would be recording the entire meeting. Tali, for once, was being quiet and contemplative, simply leaning on John. Samantha on the other hand, was making up for it. She was in a constant state of fidgets.

"I can't believe I'm going to be part of this," she whispered.

The shuttle docked, and they approached a sky car which would take them to a council room near where the Council was busy staying. So big was the Ascension that an entire road network had been built into it in order to facilitate travel from one point to another. As they reached the sky car however, numerous ordinary Asari came up and began to gather around Liara asking her all sorts of questions and sometimes, just reaching out and touching her. Like Tali on the Migrant Fleet, Liara was The Heroine of the Asari common folk.

"Enjoy the glory while it lasts," suggested John to Liara after they were hovering away towards the chambers. "They'll turn on you in a second if things don't work out the way they want."

Tali nodded and sighed.

"I feel so horribly inadequate," was Liara's response.

"So did I," replied Tali.

"Oh? When were you the celebrity?" asked Liara. She, having known Tali since the very beginning of their adventures together, was having a hard time wrapping Tali the Celebrity around her head. In theory of course, she had been informed of all the stuff which was happening to Tali. Being the Shadow Broker did that. But even so, remembering Tali, just as psychologically young as she had been, once upon a time, made it a little hard to grasp.

"On the Migrant Fleet," replied Tali. "And right after we landed on Rannoch. I suspect I still am there. But I've not been back for a year. Things changh pretty quickly in the fame game."

The Councilor Chambers were vast and large. Large enough for all the secondary operatives to be there for full recording, and likewise all the major players were there as well. John and his team found their seats and then things went dim, and then Admiral Nelson of the Geth came forward.

"Organics of all types, Creators, and Friends of Legion our Enlightener," he began.

Tali and John looked at each other. They noted the order of priority Nelson had put them in.

"We are now here to discuss the proposed strategy for the attack upon Earth. Admiral Gerrel and I both will be open to your impute and data."

John looked at Tali and silently mouthed "Gerrel?" and Tali shrugged.

A three dimensional holographic display of the Solar System leapt into view as the lights dimmed.

"Natural presumptions would be that once the Crucible is prepared for docking with the Citadel, the fleet will take the Mass Relays through to Earth and then begin our advance against the Reapers outside the orbit of Neptune," said Nelson.

Everyone who was busy looking at the holographic display of the Solar System nodded their heads in agreement.

"However," continued Admiral Gerrel, who now took center stage. "Admiral Nelson's analysis of the numbers involved has revealed a very crucial flaw in this tactic." He turned to Admiral Nelson who continued.

The viewers saw the allied fleet start to fly in from the Mass Relay and then saw the Reaper forces move from the Citadel towards the deploying fleet. In a matter of a few moments, it became obvious that long before the entire allied fleet would be able to enter and deploy, the Reapers would be among them ripping them up.

"Our entire success hinges on the full fleet being deployed," observed Admiral Nelson, his mechanical voice conveying no emotion. "Our total fleet strength is bottlenecked by the Mass Relay."

"Thermopylae," explained John leaning over to Tali. Tali nodded her head in spite of the fact that she had no idea what John was talking about.

"In order to be able to effectively use our fleet to it's full advantagh," continued Admiral Gerrel as the holographic display fell back into a thirty light year radius around Earth. "It is best that we muster at the Tau Ceti Relay, and then proceed through dark space to below the orbital plane of Earth and approach the citadel from that angle."

The new display showed a massive deployed fleet rising up from beneath the Earth.

"Our analysis of the approach has several advantages to it," continued Nelson. "First, the fleet is able to deploy in formation in dark space and thus proceed in full battle formation before the Reapers are aware of our approach. This forces the Reapers to react to our approach giving us initiative."

"Second," added Gerrel. "By approaching below the earth, the Citadel, in orbit over the English territories puts the earth between us and the Reaper force. It blocks the Reapers from knowing for certain what we are doing at the Citadel which will make the deployment of the Crucible more certain."

"Finally" finished Nelson. "For the last four days of our approach, we will effectively be in stealth. There is no means of detecting our approach from dark space until we get within the solar radius. By which time it will be to late."

"Does anyone have any questions about the strategy about the initial stage of the battle plans?" queried Gerrel.

An Asari commander promptly asked, "Will not the Earth effectively block our approach to the Citadel? Will not the Reapers be able to use the Earth as a shield during our initial approach thus taking away our ranged attack power?"

"Analysis of Reaper tactics over the past year renders that scenario highly unlikely," answered Nelson. His face plates flipped in such a fashion as to suggest he found the idea funny. "Reaper tactics have persistently, with a rate of 98.63%, consisted of charging to meet the enemy, grappling their designated target ship, and tearing it apart with their power beam, counting on their superior armaments and speed to protect them until they have destroyed their enemy."

"So," the Asari commander continued. "You fully expect the Reapers to charge around the Earth to get to us?"

"We firmly expect them to do so," answered Gerrel. "Of course in war, nothing is for certain, but the Reapers have been very predicable in their behavior."

There was a brief period of silence. Many of those present had yet to fight a single battle with the Reapers, while numerous Human and Turian commanders nodded their heads with Gerrel's and Nelson's analysis.

Nelson continued. "Upon the engagement of the two fleets, the Crucible unit will make a distant flanking maneuver around earth to connect the Crucible with the Citadel. While the landing force will make an equal distant flanking maneuver on the other side, to land in the Midlands of England where they will rendezvous with alliance resistance for the attack on London."

Gerrel spoke, "Based on our intel, the Citadel is closed and in orbit over London and the Reapers are moving both troops and prisoners through a teleport beam. In order to get the Citadel open, someone will have to get to the main command console in the Presidium and open the Citadel so that the Crucible can be put into dock."

"Wait a moment!" interjected General Petrovsky. John started and looked up. There he was, in alliance uniform, with several military decorations newly won upon his lapel. "Are you suggesting we're going to have to do something that so far has not been done? Namely take back a city on Earth?"

"You are correct in your analysis," answered Nelson. "Based on the details of that phase of the operation, we estimate that there is a better than 50% chance of success for complete take over of London."

"But we don't need to hold London," continued Gerrel. "The plan consists in getting yust one person up into the Citadel to open it up."

"How will we deal with enemy forces stationed on the Citadel?" continued Oleg.

"There will be no forces stationed there," answered Nelson. "Statistical analysis suggests that all forces in the citadel will deploy into London the moment our strike teams are in operation within the city."

"Are you saying they won't protect their flanks?" continued Oleg, clearly perturbed by this concept.

"Reapers have no flanks," snorted Gerrel. "When they are being shot at from behind, they count on their superior armor and speed to protect them until they can turn around and deal with the attack from that direction. Like in space, Reaper forces will simply move forward counting on overwhelming force to destroy anything in their way."

"How in the hell has no one defeated them yet?" shouted Petrovsky.

"The Old Machines do not fear their flank being turned. They have an almost limitless supply of forces, and their primary force, the Great Reaper Ships themselves, are superior to anything that has been brought against them," explained Nelson.

"The Reapers simply overwhelm their opposition and beat it down," continued Gerrel. "We can take London for a brief period of time, but we have no illusions about holding it for more than a few hours at best."

Petrovsky noticed John and nodded to him. "I've wondered since Omega," he continued to the assembly, "How it was that I and my troops could kill them by the thousands and yet there always seemed to be more attacking. I guess that explains it."

The conference continued for another hour as each race was given their specific assignments in the overall battle. It was clear that there would be numerous tactical finesses which would be employed which were based upon the year's experiences fighting the Reapers, both on Human, Turian, and now Asari planets. As John reviewed his part in the operation he found himself pleased with the overall plan. Tali likewise found it very clever.

"We're pretty much planned it out based on what we know the Reapers will do and how they will respond." she mused.

"Know your enemy first," replied John. "Then know yourself . . ."

"And in a thousand battles," finished Tali. "You will never be in peril."

"Commander Shepherd," began Oleg, who was walking up to them.

John turned while Tali nodded.

"General Petrovsky," replied John.

"I see that you and I will be adjacent to each other in the final deployment during the assault on London," continued Oleg.

"But you get the first strike you lucky dog you," joked John. Both of them had no illusions about the 'fun' of leading the first charge.

"Yes, I'm so . . . thrilled," sighed Oleg with a wry grin. "But what I came over to say was this. One of the nice things about fighting alongside a former opponent is you have a good estimation of his abilities. I am glad you're going to be on my six."

"And I fully expect you will conduct the initial assault skillfully," answered John. "Because I too will be fighting alongside a former opponent. In fact, one of the most resourceful I ever faced."

"Yes," grinning Oleg. "How many times did we fail to blunt the other one?"

"I don't think once," chuckled John. "If Tim hadn't send you husks disguised as Cerberus forces, I think we'd still be fighting over Omega."

"If we hadn't killed ourselves in frustration," Oleg finished.

The two soldiers began to walk away from the other milling generals and dignitaries.

"Ever fought alongside Krogan before?" asked John.

"I've never fought alongside any alien," admitted Oleg. "I don't know what to expect. This is going to be a unique experience for me."

"Well, let me tell you about the Krogan," began John.

Tali watched the two of them wander off. She looked about for Liara and Garrus, and finding them, joined them.

"So, I take it the commander is off swapping lies with our former opponent," suggested Garrus.

"Nelson and Gerrel, Yahn and Petrovsky, what is it about yenerals who turn into best of friends after they spent years trying to kill each other?" she asked.

Liara shrugged.

"It's a male thing," explained Garrus.

"Human male thing," corrected Liara.

"No, male, because we Turians experience it to," retorted Garrus.

"Never mind," sighed Tali.

"Somehow," continued Garrus quietly. "I don't feel particularly jocular right about now."

"We're only sailing into certain death," suggested Liara. "I can't imagine why that would put a damper on anything."

Tali's mind seemed to drift for a moment. The entire atmosphere suggested a certain dream sequence state to it. On the surface, they were surrounded by light and order and harmony, people were seated at tables, going over briefs and conversing among themselves, formulating plans, and yet, the plans were for a massive attack on London, of which many, if not most of them would not be coming back alive from. For 48 to 96 hours, the combined fleets and forces would have to keep the Reapers responding to threats in order to have any hope of getting into the Citadel and linking it with the Crucible. And throughout that entire time, the Reapers would be relentlessly slaughtering them. Oh the Reapers would suffer casualties, but the psychology of the Reapers seemed to suggest a 'they were too stupid to live but I'm smarter than that' mentality which seemed to render them immune to fear or panic. So far the battle experience simply had no moment in which the Reapers were not attacking, or dead. Retreat seemed an alien thing to them.

Beside her, Garrus and Liara talked quietly to themselves. At some point Garrus got up and got her a tube of tea which she sipped gratefully, but she just sat in her chair, leaned on her arms and felt . . . depressed. It was the first time she could recall feeling so down in . . . Well not since John had come back. Her head slowly shifted from this view to the next as she continued to sit. Over by the holographic display, Gerrel and Nelson were busy explaining some detail of the attack plan to a group of Salarian Special Opts. They were quite animated on some issue. She noted that Gerrel was completely at ease with Nelson. And at one point, actually put his hand on Nelson's shoulder. Was that the bloodthirsty Admiral who had done everything in his power to bring about the extinction of the Geth last year? Was he already that close to the Geth Admiral Platform that he felt at ease enough to convey trust through touch? On some level, she had to admit to herself that she still resented Gerrel's endangering of both the fleet and her Yahn during the struggle over Rannoch. And yet, Nelson was leaning in and speaking in low terms to Gerrel and Gerrel was nodding his head and bringing up new images on the holo-display. It was something she knew in theory was supposed to happen to all beings, but it was so strange to see it play out over time. She turned back to Liara and Garrus. She noted Liara simply looked back at her. Garrus would make a comment or two, Liara would respond, but as time passed, they got more silent and simply looked at each other. The final battle, the one they hoped to win, but if they lost, hoped to die in, was rapidly coming upon them.

Tali remained sad and melancholy. And then, an old folk song which Kaiden had sung just a few nights prior at a small get together in the lounge began to run through her head. Kaiden's voice had gotten deeper and richer as life had continued to refine him. The song had conveyed perfectly her mood.

_Have you seen Amanda Blaine in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Wandering through the morning rain through the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Have you seen her at her door, listening for the cannon's roar,_  
_And a man who went to war from the hills of Shiloh?_

_Have you heard her mournful cries in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Have you seen her haunted eyes in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Have you seen her running down searching through the sleeping town,_  
_In her yellowed wedding gown in the hills of Shiloh?_

_Have you seen her standing there in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Wind a blowing through her hair in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Listening for the sound of guns listening for the rolling drums,_  
_And a man who never comes to the hills of Shiloh?_

_Have you heard Amanda sing in the hills of Shiloh,_  
_Whispering to her wedding ring in the hills of Shiloh?_  
_Hear her humming soft and low, poor Amanda doesn't know,_  
_'Twas ended forty years ago in the hills of Shiloh._

"Tali?" it was John's voice.

She turned her head as she felt his hands rest upon her shoulders.

"Tali? We're going now," he said.

She checked her Omnitool. She had been seated a full hour and a half with Liara and Garrus. Her tea was half drunk and cold. She unclipped the tube, put it on the table, quietly walked back to the sky-car that would take them to the dock and to the shuttle. All the while she held on to her Yahn's arm.

"You okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she said in that universal tone that women use when they are not.

"Don't forget I love you," he whispered back. It was his usual response to that tone of 'I'm fine'.

She cried quietly to herself all the way back to the Normandy.

October 12th, 1200 hours, outside the windows of the Normandy, over 125,000 ships flew in perfect formation, two hours from the edge of the Solar System. Gerrel's and Nelson's analysis of the Mass Relay bottleneck had proven more than a little prescient. It had taken a full seventeen hours for all the ships to get through the Tau Ceti Relay and deploy. There had been three Reapers in the system, they had, true to nature, attacked. And true to nature, when confronted with a rapidly increasing level of enemy ships they had persisted in attacking. Seven ships had been lost before the Reapers were destroyed, and the Allied Species knew they had been lucky, over three hundred ships were already in system when the first Reaper had come to grapple. It had been six days since, traveling through dark space slowly closing in on Earth.

Tali was seated at the dining table in the galley, looking at a single cupcake with a frosted two upon it's icing.  
"Happy Anniversary, Tali Duck," said John.

"You made this for me?" she asked.

"Well I had help with EDI and Gabby," explained John. "I taste tested it, it's horribly rich and sweet so I think you'll find it palatable."

"But Yahn? How am I going to eat it?"

"We're going to put it into a tube here in a second, but I thought you would like to see what it looked like baked."

"It's . . . It's so sweet of you," she said. Once again, there was a soft meeping noise and a whifting of her visor cleaning system. Tali had been crying on and off over the past few days. Not that anyone blamed her. Folks were connecting one last time with what was left of their families. All Tali had was Aunti Raan and Aunti Raan was leading a wing of the Quarian Fleet. She was here with Tali, somewhere in the vast formation which approached Earth.

"An eighth of a million ships, a quarter of a million soldiers," mused Joker who was seated nearby. "Hey commander? Do you remember us going to Eden Prime with Nilhus? Didn't I say there was more to the mission than they were letting on?"

"I think we can put that down as an accurate prediction by Joker," replied John smiling and shaking his head. "So what do you think about the up coming mission? Is it going to be bigger than it looks?"

"Nah," replied Joker. "I think, well I hope anyway, it's just a drop off run."

"So what's it like being married for two years?" asked Gabby.

"Yust like being married yesterday," answered Tali with a moment's reflection. "And so's the anniversary. We're going to be shot at this evening, yust like last time."

"Yeah looks like Loco remembered to call in the explosions for this one," observed James. "How many Reapers are supposed to be in orbit around Earth?"

"Estimates are 5,371," replied EDI. "This gives us a 23.337925 to one ship ratio in strength. However, as has been observed by organics, numbers alone confer no advantage."

"Especially with Reapers," sighed Kaiden. He looked at James who looked back at him. Over the past few days, Kaiden had received news that his high school potential sweetheart had been killed. The one he had 'kept things formal' with. James likewise had no clue what had happened to Myra. John could not help but feel horribly guilty. He still had Tali seated there next to him.

The cup cake was taken away and put into 'Tali's' tube. Tali took a moment and then clipped in on and started to eat it. It wasn't as sweet as John had said. In fact, it tasted a little bland, but He had worked hard to make it and that made it special to her. For a moment, memories of their brief time in the Apartment last year flashed through her. For a second, all she could do, while nibbling on the cupcake, was look at him. He was looking at her expectantly.

"It's good Yahn," she said. That seemed to put him at ease.

Joker looked over to EDI, as he put his finger over his ear com. "Admiral Hackett is closing and requests permission to board Commander!" he said.

"Well, inform him I'll be ready to pipe him on," answered John. He gave Tali a quick little hug and left to greet the Admiral. Tali reached out with her arm and gently ran her fingers down his arm as he departed. John left feeling just a little depressed. Tali had been prone to sudden crying jags all week. He had experienced some of this just before the suicide mission, but nothing this intense. It seemed as if the closer they got, the harder it was for her to deal with the threat of losing him. On one level, his ego suggested he was one really cool dude to have a woman that deeply in love with him, but the part of him that loved her was sad that she was suffering bouts of grief over the threat of loss.

He watched as the dreadnought approached the Normandy, and then extended it's docking tube, linking up to the Normandy's front airlock. Then the docking was done, and the Admiral and his entourage entered the Normandy.

"Commander?" began Hackett.

"Admiral?" answered Shepherd.

"Are you ready to bring the might of the galaxy to bear upon the Reapers?" asked Hackett. It was overly dramatic given the situation, but John did not begrudge Hackett's desire to say something which might be historical enough to be recorded for posterity.

"Yes sir!" he answered.

"Then let us begin to confirm the readiness of the fleets . . ." Hackett finished.

A signal was sent out and all the ships linked up into a single com network.

"All fleets are reporting in, Sir," affirmed Traynor.

Hackett, stood at the Command Terminal of the Normandy, and gave the rally speech.

"Never before," he began. "Have so many come together, from all quarters of the galaxy. But never before have we faced an enemy such as this. The Reapers will show us no mercy. Accordingly we must give them no quarter. They will terrorize our populations. We must stand fast in the face of that terror. They will advance until our last city falls. But we will not fall. We will prevail. Each of us will be defined by our coming actions in the battle. Stand fast! Stand strong! Stand together! Hackett out."

He stepped off the platform and turned to face John.

"Commander Shepherd?" he said. "You are ready to lead the forces to retake London?"

John nodded. "Any last details?" He asked.

"Anderson will brief you," replied Hackett as they headed for the Comm Room.

Anderson's image was already up.

"Commander," he said. "Are you ready with Hammer?"

John nodded. "The plan remains unchanged?"

"Hammer will break into London to secure the beam leading up to the Citadel. From there you will open the arms of the Citadel. At that point, unless Hackett says otherwise, Shield will move the Crucible into place and dock it. Then Hammer will, if necessary, activate the Crucible. Sword Fleet's job will be to keep the Reapers tied down above Earth so that Hammer only has to engage Reaper ground forces."

John nodded. "Looks like we're a go then. If everything works, Shield will have it easy."

"Unless they screw up the docking procedures," observed Hackett. "And render the Crucible in-operational. All the while hopefully not being shot at by Reapers. No pressure on Shield at all."

"Right," admitted John. "Since you have already had to smack me silly once, I'll try again. If the Reapers simply form a wall around the Citadel, it won't matter if we get it open."

"They won't," replied Hackett. "Our fleet strength makes it entirely necessary for them to close with us. If they simply form a defensive perimeter, our numbers will whittle them down. Once they see our battle formation they'll immediately realize we are planning on our standard tactic with them, namely bringing sufficient concentrated fire on them. They have to close and inflict casualties. If they don't, we destroy them one by one, slowly of course, but persistently. Of course we have a few tricks up our sleeve which hopefully will put a little panic into Harbinger. Though I doubt it."

"The lack of fear by the Reapers has always been an advantage to us," answered John. "It's enabled us to kill a few of them."

"At the cost of several hundred ships per kill," replied Hackett.

"But only before we realized we simply had to let them have what they wanted," said John.

"Like Earth, Palavan, and Thessia," replied Hackett. "It's been a horrible sacrifice we have had to make."

"But we have the entirety of the fleets here," said John. "And our best bet to win this."

"But if we lose, Shepherd," continued Hackett. "We won't have anything to stop the Reaper advance."

"If we lose, Hackett," answered Shepherd. "We're just the fourth harvest by the Reapers."

"It's down to this battle, all or nothing. I hate making these sorts of decisions," sighed Hackett.

"Gambles take as much courage as facing an enemy," sighed John.

Hackett nodded. He then returned to his ship.

John went up to the bridge. He got a little message from Tali in Engineering. It was simple and to the point. It said, "I love you, John."

"Approaching visual with the Solar system," announced Joker. "We're going to be spotted by the Reapers in 3o seconds. Alliance fleet reporting," He continued. "Turian Fleet reporting, Asari Fleets reporting . . ."

"Quarian Fleets accounted for and ready," reported Admiral Koris over the public Com.

"Geth fleet reporting," continued Joker. "All fleets reporting Commander. Ready to engage on your command."

It had been the decision of the United Species that Commander Shepherd, for his unstinting work over the past few years, be given the privilege of ordering . . . The Charge.

"This is it everyone, be ready on my signal!" he said.

And then, from around the planet, the Reapers began to show themselves, by the tens, then hundreds, and then thousands . . .

"Commander!" began EDI's voice over the comm. "Total Reaper strength now appears to be 7,539 adjusting our ship ratio down . . ."

"Don't quote me the odds EDI!" snapped Shepherd. "We have to do this regardless!"

"All fleets!" he commanded over the public Comm. "Engage!"

Down in Engineering, Ken, Gabby, Adams, and Tali all saw and heard the Tantalus Core drive engage and begin the acceleration. They looked at each other and nodded. They would only know the fate of their ship when the battle was over, or they heard the klaxon warning them to abandon ship, or they found themselves dead. Such was the life of a ship's engineer in the middle of a battle.

Space combat, like air combat, is in three dimensions. But likewise there is no air which governs the maneuvers which spaceships engage in. Likewise, gravity has far less impact, but inertia, far more. Even so, terms such as flank, front, rear, high, and low still have meaning, once one recognizes which perspective one is referring to.

The Reapers swiftly moved around the planet Earth and proceeded forward in a pointed conical formation, quickly adjusting as only synthetic life can. They saw the entire allied fleet spread out across the sky and charged as they always had.

And then 500 Geth ships suddenly leapt out of the formation of the Allied fleets and shot forward. The Reapers responded by speeding up as well, 500 Reapers starting to extend their arms to grapple the approaching Geth.

The 500 ships were armed with pretty unexceptional weapons, but they used them well, firing specifically at the lead Reaper who was destroyed by the concentrated fire, but as the Reapers closed in, the entire 500 continued to adjust their speed and keep firing. What the Reapers may have thought of this maneuver was never known, but everyone on the Allied Fleet was not surprised that the Reapers continued to close since the Geth alliance with the organics was a very vocal proclamation that the ideology that organics and synthetics were doomed to fight each other for eternity was one big fat lie. The Reapers hated the Geth on a very deep and profound level. The Reapers closed swiftly and all 500 of the designated Reapers seemed to grapple onto the Geth ships at the exact same instant. Such was the acceleration of the Geth ships, coupled with their formation, that it seemed a curious coincidence.

Or was it?

Harbinger, quickly analyzing the situation, in a matter of milliseconds, noted the following. First, the Geth ships had seemed to adjust their speeds so that all 500 Reapers would latch on at the same time. Second, all this had happened outside of fire support from the Allied Fleet. Third, at the latching, the Geth abandoned their ships, for each Geth apparently had a single node which enabled him to almost instantaneously upload himself back to the fleet. Fourth, there was, exactly 2 microseconds later, a small controlled explosion in each of the Geth ships. And one microsecond later, that small controlled explosion had apparently slammed one small piece of refined plutonium into another piece producing a chain reaction fission which was the opening salvo of an exploding nuclear bomb.

It had been a trap, specifically designed to take advantage of the Reaper willingness to charge and tear apart and it worked because it had been undertaken by the Geth who alone had the means to pull such a precise maneuver off. Any other way to deliver an atomic bomb was easy to counter. And that was why they had ended up obsolete with the advance of weapons technology. They were simply too slow, clumsy, and sloppy to be employed in modern warfare. The Reapers, having guided technology to this point, had attacked the galaxy with that knowledge. The idea that a nuclear attack, of the magnitude that they had just received, simply was so unlikely they had not bothered to account for it. Likewise that a race would deliberately destroy their own weapons of war was equally inconceivable to the Reapers. Sacrifice was an alien thing to them, totally out of their comprehension let alone their calculations. The Reapers might boast that their enlightened thoughts were above the comprehension of John Michael Shepherd and his pathetic fluke humans, but the truth was? It was the other way around.

In that next instant, all 500 Reapers who had latched on to those 500 Geth ships were within a 5,000 celsius degree heat bath. And there is no matter in the universe, however well built, which is able to withstand the heat generated by the surface of an ordinary sun. All 500 Reapers who had latched on were instantly vaporized. But that wasn't the end of it, for nuclear bombs have a radius of effect. Another 841 Reapers were so badly damaged (or killed) that they were of no further use for the present battle. An additional 975 Reapers were seriously damaged sufficiently that they would be far less effective and far more vulnerable to Allied fleet fire. And 1,482 Reapers suffered minor damage which likewise impacted their combat capabilities.

In a single precise instant, the Reapers had experienced the most catastrophic battle loss in their entire history. Their entire combat capability had been effectively reduced by nearly one third.

"Who would have thought such a primitive weapon would have produced such a decisive result?" asked Javik.

But no one heard him because everyone on the Normandy was screaming in triumph at what they had just witnessed. In fact, the millions of crew members and soldiers on the entire United Species fleets were screaming in jubilation. For none of them, but especially the Humans, Asari, Turians, and Batarians, had not on some level experienced the horrific slaughter that the Reapers had unleashed upon the galaxy in the prior year.

Payback was sweet.

"Joker?" queried EDI the moment Joker quit screaming and waving his arms (albeit gently) "I feel that there is a certain level of humor in the surprise that the Geth have just played upon the Reapers. Am I correct in my analysis?"

"Yeah EDI," cried Joker. "That is what we call a practical joke!"

"I don't think the Reapers find it funny though," reflected EDI.

"It doesn't matter what they think EDI, what matters is that we just DUSTED THE SONS OF BITCHES!"

"Pity we won't be able to pull that trick on them again," commented EDI. "As they are synthetics, they won't make that mistake a second time."

Whether or not that would have proven true remained to be seen, for Reapers where not just synthetic, but synthetic with an overwhelmingly arrogant personality which lent itself to doing the same sorts of stupids repeatedly. But EDI did have a point, the trick could only work with Geth handling the coordination. While humans had similar attack tactics in their own history, some of them being actual suicide attacks, such as the Kamikaze and Suicide Bomber, there had never been sufficient volunteers to make that type of an attack with such a decisive result.

It took a few moments for the Reapers to reconstitute themselves, so much damage had been inflicted upon them, but as was so often the case, once they reconstituted, they resumed their advance. And the battle began in earnest.

Thanks to the Geth, working in tandem with the Allied VI's, each ship knew what their best designated target was, and once again, fire was concentrated upon Reapers so that there would be casualties. But the fleets began to notice something as the fight proceeded. Namely, Harbinger was simply bringing in more reinforcements through the Mass Relay. It didn't matter that the Allies at present had the advantage, if Harbinger could make good his losses, the allies would once again be on the losing side of the exchange. And this was one of the horrific advantages that the Reapers had. Because they had spent the last 50,o00 years in deep space, no one knew just how many of them there were. Nor did the humans have the means to ascertain their full deployment. Space was simply too big for that.

In Engineering, Tali, Ken, Adams, and Gabby heard the shouting through the vents. Tali smiled to herself for she knew of the first attack tactic. She looked around at Ken and Gabby, and then swiveled to look at Adams who grinning back. She was feeling just a little proud. This was a proud moment not just for the Geth, but for their creators, her own people.

As it was however, the United Fleets, closing in with the Reapers, their weapons firing as they advanced, now provided the necessary cover for Shield to break off and start it's long right flank swing while the transports of Hammer shot out and performed their long left flank swing. Harbinger responded by simply ignoring both groups as the chief threat was located in front of him in the main allied battle fleet. Either that, or he knew something about the situation in London and on the Citadel which the allies did not.

War is kind of sucky that way.

Once the two fleets were engaged, Joker made note, and announced that the Normandy would now break off and began the descent towards Earth. Thanks to the stealth capabilities of the ship, they would not need to follow Hammer's wide flank maneuver before they got to Earth. Team Normandy was first and foremost a ground operation team. There was no point in them staying on the Normandy for the space battle. From Engineering, Tali looked up and began her preparations. She would be with the ground team as usual. Adams, Ken, and Gabby began their silent goodbye and good luck you are so going to need it glances. Tali returned the gestures, though it wasn't so much a glance as it was body language. Garrus began wrapping up his final examinations of the cannons, making sure each of the Normandy's guns was finely calibrated to maximum capacity. Liara notified Feron and her drone, Glyph, and they began to pick up the slack of information analysis while she got ready. EDI began to chatter with Joker over the comm system which was EDI's way of saying goodbye, while Kaiden and James in the docking bay began to examine their weapons and armor. Cortez likewise got into his armor and prepared a pistol. He would be with the shuttle the whole time, but they were flying into a horror battlefield and it paid to be as protected as you could be.

John turned to head down to the docking bay.

"Commander?" queried Joker.

John turned around to see Joker getting out of his chair and take a few cautious steps forward up to John. Joker then, in complete contrast to his usual jocular style, gave John a formal military salute.

"Be careful down there," he said.

"We'll be fine," replied John returning the salute. "Stay focused."

"Aye Aye," answered Joker. He returned to his seat and spent a second being sad.

Over the next hour, Hammer launched the invasion shuttles which proceeded towards the English midlands. For the first few hours of flight, there was nothing but stars out the windows, and then, the sky began to get a little blue, the stars faded, and the reflection from the sun suggested they were in the atmosphere descending. And then they descended into clouds, and then it got dark. John looking out the windows realized it wasn't moisture clouds, but smoke from the great fires which were burning on the surface of the planet. And the farther down they got, the darker it got.

"Mordor's fumes over Gondor," he mused.

"The Siege of Minas Tirith," added EDI. "One of the great dramatic moments in the book."

"Approaching the entry to the LZ," announced Cortez.

"How does it look?" asked John.

"Like a sweet spot in the middle of hell," he answered.

They were flying over the midlands. Beneath them were small copses of woods, fields, and pastures, barns and houses, small villages, hardly looking damaged at all. But they saw no people. All around them on the horizon, great grey clouds seemed to rise and red reflections seemed to ring the horizon.

"Doesn't look like home any more," sighed James.

"Here we go," said Cortez, "Get ready."

And the shuttle Team Normandy was in began to descend into what looked to be a wheat field, left fallow with a damaged tractor in the center of it. The shuttles behind them formed a straight line and went Nap of the Earth to avoid and Reaper long range detection.

"So much green," exclaimed Tali. "This would have looked so pretty."

And then, the shuttles seemed to fly right through the surface of the field.

For the field was nothing more than a very detailed holographic image hiding the entrance to a well built Rachni tunnel, wide and opened mouthed at first, but quickly narrowing to just wide enough to accommodate a very long line of shuttles.

"Welcome to the latest extension of the London Underground," suggested Steve. "Express service to the center of the city, and the war. We'll be driving down this very boring tunnel for the next five hours. Might as well take naps, once you're in London, all the beds are infested with husks and cockroaches."

"Damn maids, can't get any decent one's on London anymore can they?" half grumbled Kaiden. His expression however conveyed the irony of the situation.

"I seem doomed to fight in dirty environments this year," sighed Tali.

"Hey Sparks, look at the bright side," suggested James with a smile. "We're cleaning up this town. Removing all those dirty Reapers."

"Gonna take a big dustpan," suggested Garrus.

The Rachni had done their job well. Once they had reached the end of the tunnel, they found that it opened up into dozens of passageways with low docks for the fitting of the shuttles. Hammer disembarked over a twenty mile radius, underneath the city of London through dozens of tunnels. Every single race was present for the attack. Humans were rubbing shoulders with Elcor, Volus, Krogan, Turians, Asari, and Quarians. There was even a Vorcha raiding pack. The Rachni were present as well, primarily as Combat Engineers. They would remain below London providing for the hospitals and refugee centers since part of the attack was to strike at the camps inside of London and free the prisoners. It took an additional hour to confirm all the separate elements of the attack and during that time, John was able to once again meet up with Admiral Anderson and his Aid de Camp, Major Coats. Major Coats was already something of a legend, he had spent a full three days at the top of Big Ben sniping at anything that had moved on the streets of London. And during that time, not one single Reaper solider had found him. He was in his mid thirties, a good solid built of a man, the sort that possessed that curious celtic toughness which didn't look too scottish, but remained just a bit intimidating when you looked into his deep set eyes.

"Damn you're a sight for sore eyes," said Anderson embracing Commander Shepherd.

"How are we looking?" asked John.

"Thanks to the Rachni Engineering, Hammer has deployed," said Anderson.

"And not a moment too soon," added Major Coats.

"What's left of the resistance has spread out to all the entry points and will be acting as guides to get the troops initially deployed in the city proper itself," continued Anderson. "But the Reapers know something is up, forward scouts are reporting movements into the city itself, pulling back from the outward perimeters. Once the attack commences, the Resistance will regroup, but the bulk of the work is going to have to be done by Hammer."

"It must have been brutal here," observed Shepherd. "Cut off from the rest of the Alliance."

"It's been touch and go from day one," said Anderson. "But once we realized that the Reapers focused on major centers it became easier to avoid direct contact."

"Until London," commented Major Coats.

"Yeah," replied Anderson. "We held back as long as we could. Sending in Recon teams. We lost a lot of good men planning this attack. But with soldiers like Major Coats, and knowing you were bringing help? We held on."

"Without you and your resistance, we'd be dead in the water," suggested Shepherd.

"Yeah, the Admiral's being modest," suggested Major Coats with a grin. "He's the reason any of us are still alive."

"Let's not just start handing out any medals yet," suggested Anderson. "This fight is just getting started. And Hammer had better be ready for it."

"They didn't start out together," said John as Tali came up to him. He put his hand on her shoulder for emphasis, and she responded by placing her hand upon his. "But they are ready to fight side by side and win this war."

"Good," said Anderson. "That's what it's going to take."

"We'll get it done Anderson," said John.

Anderson seemed to think for a moment. John recognized that posture. It was the stance of a man who was briefly overwhelmed by the circumstances, but in a good way.

"The entire galaxy standing united," Anderson said, almost in awe, almost to himself. "To bad it took the Reapers to unite us."

"Shepherd united them," suggested Coats.

"That's exactly what I meant," replied Anderson. "I know you didn't like leading this Shepherd, but nobody could have accomplished what you've done."

"Thank you," replied John. "But I didn't do it alone." He looked at Tali's visor, and she looked back at him. Then his eyes scanned his team, James, Kaiden, Garrus, Liara, Javik, and EDI.

Major Coats paused and put his fingers to his right ear, and then nodded.

"They are signaling full preparation," he said. "All elements reporting in as fully deployed."

"Then go!" snapped Anderson.

"All units, rise up!" commanded Major Coats.

In a matter of seconds, London trembled with the roar of controlled engineering explosions. Basement walls blew out and Krogan poured through. Subway tunnels blew open and Humans came out. Sewer floors erupted and out came the Turians. Within a matter of three minutes, over 250 separate entry points had been blown open from under London and Hammer came pouring out.

The Reapers had problems with underground tactics, and the net result was that every single Reaper soldier simply turned towards the nearest enemy and attacked. Thus the one thing absolutely necessary for Reaper success on the ground was taken from them, namely overwhelming force. All the perimeter defenses which would have rendered a frontal assault a bloody deadly mess were utterly useless. For the most part, Reapers forces were chewed apart by coordinated team tactics individually and allied forces were shortly moving at will through the majority of the streets of London. But it was still a big city and Reaper troops knew how to stage ambushes. In addition, Destroyer Reapers were about and those took some serious firepower to bring down. But Destroyers were not the Great Capital Reapers, they were vulnerable to hard armor piercing missile attacks and Thanix Missiles were swiftly deployed and used against the giant beasts. Block by block, the allies combed the ruins. Within an hour, the first camp was liberated and allied species troops poured in and saw for themselves the horror of a Reaper processing camp. It was a gruesome sight. The Reapers had seen no need for serious nourishment or medical attention since the fate of all those in the camps was processing into components for a Reaper or transformation into a Reaper soldier. Any food and medicine had to be provided by the humans in the camps themselves. In addition, indoctrination was a constant and many of the prisoners actually were angry at the allies thinking they were to blame for their present misery.

And it was in that Camp that James found Myra. She was emaciated, practically in a coma, and laying beside a processing pod. He gently carried her down to one of the Rachni hospital units, and leaving a small note in her hand, he left her there. When she woke, the nurse showed her the note, and she read it and wept. For she knew her life had been just saved by a man whom she had tried to kill just one year prior.

Team Normandy spent the next three hours fighting, moving from block to block, slowly inching towards the great beam which rose on the horizon through the great cloud cover which hid the day and night sky from London. It was a horror story come to life. Overhead, clouds boiled and reflected the flashes from the explosions and great flickering maelstrom fires which raged over parts of London.

"Did Rannoch look like this when the Geth drove us out?" queried Tali.

"Negative," replied a Geth platform nearby. "Geth strategy was self-preservation with the hopes that at some point the Creators would no longer pose a threat and could return. Reaper strategy is complete and total annihilation."

"So Earth is suffering more," she mused.

"Affirmative," replied the Geth.

By the end of three hours, over 75% of London was in Allied hands but the beam was not. Reaper reinforcements were constantly landing around the beam and spreading out. It was rapidly looking as if the next push would be towards the beam itself, narrowing the perimeter where the Reapers would be able to safely land without having to employ one of the great capital ships.

Anderson had set up a temporary quarters just over a mile from the beam, nearly on the front line. Barricades were up and waves of Reaper troops kept up the pressure. But there, just over a mile away, the means to ending the war glowed in the dark murky air. A beacon of hope, but likewise a mockery. Behind Team Normandy, thousands of troops were deploying. And across the way, Reaper transports were disgorging yet more troops.

"So close," Tali thought. "And yet it might as well be a million miles away."

It reminded her of the Normandy adrift in the Collector system. But they had gotten through that crises. They would get through this one too. If only she could know how now.


	37. Chapter 37 - London Battle

October 13th, 0600. October 13th was a mystical day in the Catholic Calendar. In 1917 one of the great miracles had taken place, one which defined the entire 20th century and who's repercussions were not fully sorted out until after the fall of the West. Like today, the day had started out overcast, but it had been a natural overcast, the sort that came with a rain. But then the sky had cleared, the sun had come out, and danced . . . Literally. John looked up at the boiling clouds with the transport beam shimmering in the distance, the clouds boiling about it. A single shaft of light which all the darkness of the Reapers could not extinguish for darkness, like evil, is merely the absence of it's opposite. It is not a thing which exists in and of itself. Pure evil can not exist, for existence itself is good. To become completely evil is to cease to be. So even though that light was the tool of the Reapers, it's very presence seemed to promise their eventual defeat.

"Today's the day we do it," concluded John. "By 2400 tonight, we'll have either won or lost."

A quarter of a million men had invaded London. Casualties were already measured in the tens of thousands. For every single dead alliance soldier, there were ten dead Reaper soldiers, but the Reaper forces numbered in the millions. And more were pouring in. The rattle of the heavy anti-infantry guns were once again sounding. John found himself taking a few moments to walk through the rubble, and muse. He found himself standing next to Major Coats.

"The fighting here has been some of the worst on the planet," began Coats. "It looks bad, but there's still hope. And you're here. It'll do the troops good to see you."

John sighed to himself. He really had a hard time with the foibles of celebrity status. He felt so fragile, so insignificant. There were suns out there that swallowed planets ten thousands times the size of earth and yet he was bigger than that in the eyes of so many ordinary soldiers. And what he found so ironic was that some of those soldiers had killed as many as he had, had saved as many lives as he had, and yet . . . They would pass into obscurity and be forgotten.

". . . Bolster their resolve," continued Coats.

"I'm just a soldier like them," he replied to Coats.

"You might see yourself like that," said Coats. "But they don't. Like it or not Commander, you are a hero to these men and women. Don't discount the effect that can have on them."

He paused.

"I had better go meet up with my battalion," he finished. "I'll see you later Commander."

John continued to wander.

"Hey Commander," began James.

"What? No Loco?" asked John with a slight touch of smile.

"Yeah, sorry," replied James. He shrugged and the image he had of St. James on his shoulder came into prominence. One of the twelve who had followed Christ, James had gone to Spain and died there. He had become the Patron Saint of Spain and during the Reconquista, had been known to fight alongside the Knights against the Moslems. The last time the Spanish had seen him do that was when they were charging up the steps of the great Temple of Technocticlan and put an end forever to the human sacrifices of the Aztecs. So naturally, St. James was portrayed on a knightly horse in armor charging with a lance.

"You okay?" asked John. No one was quite sure what sort of feelings James was experiencing, especially given what had happened to Myra, and even though she was alive, she was at death's door from malnourishment and exposure.

"I don't know what I'd feel coming back to earth," replied James quietly and softly. "I was ready to fight, ready to die. But seeing everything like this . . ."

"I know it's hard to see," replied John looking once more down the road at the beam in the distance. "This is only temporary. But first we need to win this thing. Stay focused. Don't let them take your will to fight."

"I know . . . I know," said James. "I'm in." He paused. "So! I guess this is it? No? One more push . . . One last fight."

"Not necessarily our last," observed John. One never knew how it would play out.

"It's been an honor serving with you Shepherd," James finished.

"You're a good man, and a deserving soldier," commented John.

"Thanks."

"What ever happens out there," finished John. "I know you'll make me proud. Oh, Tali will be on my six, but I want you on my nine."

"That means a lot to me sir, and Loco? Good luck!"

John resumed his walking. More and more activity was heard as more companies were calling in and reconstituting. Makos were driving by, shuttles were flying overhead, and off in the distance, the grinding roar of reaper transport depositing more troops could be heard.

"Shepherd?" queried Kaiden as John walked up to him.

"How are you holding up?" asked John.

"More or less. Everything is depending on this. Do you think we have a chance?"

"There's always hope," answered John. "It's how we got this far."

"You made it happen you know."

"Doesn't matter. We're here now. Ready to fight? Ready to die? No second chances."

"It always comes down to this doesn't it? Every battle? Feels like a thousand years since we landed on Eden Prime. So much has happened. It's really a surprise that we're here you know?"

"You'll survive Blue," said John. "Always have."

"I hope you're right."

"I'm right. You're a fine soldier. I've always been lucky to have you on my teams."

"Thanks Commander."

"One more hill to take brother Specter, I'm putting you on the left flank with EDI. You ready?"

"Sir? Yes sir," replied Kaiden with that soft whiskey tenor voice.

John continued his wandering. He heard Garrus arguing with another Turian who was complaining that the Krogan were not willing to share supplies. Garrus dismissed that as Wrex playing hard to get and proposed putting a crate of beer into the mix which would make him more amenable. Then Garrus turned around and saw John leaning on his right leg, arms crossed, and grinning.

"Shepherd?" queried Garrus. "So I guess this is . . ."

"Just like old times," interrupted John.

"Huh? Eh? Hmmm," suggested Garrus. "Might be the last chance we get to say that."

"Suggesting we're going to lose?" asked John.

"No," replied Garrus firmly. "I think we are about to kick the Reapers back into what ever black hole they crawled out of. Then we're going to retire to somewhere warm and tropical, you and Tali, me and Liara, and live off the royalties from the vids while our respective wives go shopping every afternoon."

"Sounds like a plan. I think my days of saving the galaxy are over with after this little job."

"Be sure to leave enough room for all the autographs," suggested Garrus.

"All we have to do is beat the Reapers don't we?"

"James told me there's an old saying that the Irish like to say, 'May you be in heaven half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.' Not sure if Turian heaven is the same as . . ."

"It is."

" . . . But if this thing goes sideways and we both end up there. Meet me at the bar. I'm buying."

"I know just the bar," said John. "It's this French Cafe . . . Never mind . . . But as it is, we're a team Garrus. There's no Shepherd without Vakarian. So you had better remember to duck."

"Sorry, Turians don't know how," replied Garrus. "But I'll improvise. And Shepherd, forgive the insubordination, but this old friend has an order for you." And his voice was almost whisper, trembling in emotion. "Go out there and give them hell! You were born to do this! Or if not, you were definitely brought back for it."

"Goodbye Garrus, and if I'm up there first, in that bar and you're not? I'll be looking down and watching. I'll always have your six."

Then Primarch Victus came up. He had been the general which John had rescued early in the war. He had been leading the Turians since then. His presence here clearly signaled to all the Turians, as well as the allies races that this was the seminal battle for the war. Likewise, when the leader shared the danger, the men would follow.

"Primarch?" asked John.

"I wanted to return the favor in person," replied the Primarch. "Though I'm sorry to see your world looks as bad as ours."

John nodded. He left Garrus and the Primarch to coordinate Turian maneuvers in Hammer and he went back to wandering. Then he looked into a room and there was Liara . Her omni-tool was out as she was busy collecting yet more information.

"What's the news?" he asked.

"They are making another push. A lot of soldiers are wounded and won't make it."

"The Reapers are closing in," repeated John, half to her and half to himself.

"This is it," she sighed. "Isn't it?"

"Yeah," answered John. "This is it."

"I don't know what to say," she continued. "History will be disappointed that I didn't have a speech."

"You, me, and especially Garrus will make up a good story for the records," suggested John.

Liara smiled in spite of the circumstances.

"I do have one thing for you, and the rest of the team. I'm still tracking everyone down. It's a gift which will only take a moment."

"What kind of gift?" asked John.

"Do you remember when I first joined my consciousness to yours? When we went through the Prothean visions? I can show you something we Asari all share in common. Asari some times do this with good friends, or lovers. Garrus has already received his. It can also be a way to say . . . farewell."

John nodded. "I will accept this."

Liara reached up with her hands and placed them upon his face, as she had twice before . . . Once upon a time it seemed.

"Close your eyes," she said.

Suddenly, from John's perspective it was all dark, and then the galaxy seemed to spring into view and he saw it, the entire starry universe, spinning in harmony, a cosmic dance which seemed to stretch as far as his eye could see. There was, even now, order and unity.

Then he was back on Earth.

"Thank you," she said. "For everything. Now, let's do what needs to be done."

John turned and walked away. He was pondering. And then suddenly, he missed Tali. Where had she gone? It was that curious phenomena, that aching longing which came from someone who was so familiar that there was nothing about them that surprised you save their timing, and yet you missed them at the strangest times and so wanted them to be there for you. He missed her face. Even if she was there with him, he wouldn't be able to see her face. But if he could see the glow of her eyes through the visor, he could imagine the smile, he could imagine the little sparkles in her eyes, he could imagine that blue-black hair flowing over her face and spilling upon her shoulders. Hair so soft that it was like holding a breath of air in your fingers. He began to look for her. And he walked out of the building and he heard the booming voice of Wrex. Wrex was speaking to a crowd of Krogan, but likewise he was speaking to a set of hovering cameras. He was the Lord of Tuchanka, giving his final orders to the Krogan force. He was of course, building up the Krogan psyche, but at the same time, John realized that what he was saying rang true.

"When there were monsters!" cried Wrex. "When the galaxy thought they were doomed! There was one word that drove back the darkness. There was one word which brought safety to the frightened masses. One word delivered the killer blow. There was one word which the monsters feared! And that one word was KROGAN!"

A thunderous cheer came up from the assembled Krogan before him. And John nodded in agreement. It was as if the Krogan had been created for one thing and that was to fight the really scary bad guys.

"And today, that word is spoken again! Today, the Krogan rise again! Today, we forge a new path! And join the galaxy as allies in victory! Today, we win our future!"

There was more thunderous shouting. John smiled. That was a cry that would have put fear into the hearts of more than a few opponents. Would the Reapers even notice? The more he thought about it, the less he wanted them too. While ancient folk tales spoke of those who had no fear as those who were the most dangerous, he knew better. Fear was the thing that enabled you to not be hit when you were fighting. If they never strike you, they will never kill you.

"Shepherd!" said Wrex looking back at John. He was grinning like he had back on the first Normandy. "You did it. No matter what else happens today, you did what no one else could. You united a galaxy. That's a victory right there. And don't worry, I know why you're going to win, because you brought the Krogan."

John chuckled in spite of himself.

Wrex looked about. "Now that I look over it. Earth reminds me of home. Guess you'll be needing a new planet too. It's okay, Tuchanka has room to spare, and a guard dog named Kalros." He was referring to the great Thresher Maw which had pulled down a reaper as they struggled to get the genophage cure distributed through the shroud. "We're ready, just say the word."

John continued his search for Tali. As he reached an open window, that is, one who's glass had been blown out, he found Javik looking out of it next to a human sniper.

"Commander?" he began.

"Was it this bad in your time?" asked John.

"Worse," replied Javik. "I have been listening to the Krogan speak to his men. In our cycle the races never came together. There was no rallying cry. I am jealous of you."

"Really?" asked John. This was the first time Javik had found something about this time which he regarded as better than his own. "There's not much left out there." He gestured to the rubble and ruin that once had been called London.

"The future is still out there," observed Javik. "It is something my people could never say, 'There will be a tomorrow.'"

"Only if we win today," said John.

"No one else has ever made it this far," replied Javik.

"You came a long way Javik. Further than any one else here."

"And I look forward to fulfilling my mission. But you are now the avatar of this cycle. The exemplar of victory. Not just of Humanity, or Turians, or Protheans. But for all life. Every soul that has ever existed is watching this moment."

"Well . . . No pressure if you put it that way," replied John. He smiled. It seemed that Javik was beginning to grasp the essential elements of the supernatural, but more importantly, incorporate them into his thinking.

"Do not waver. Victory is never won without difficult choices."

"I know. I've had to make a lot of those."

"There maybe more," continued Javik. He turned and looked into John's eyes. For a moment, John found himself gazing into the four eyes of Javik. "But I know you will see this through for all of us. No matter the cost."

And then, for the first time since John had woken him up. Javik reached out and grasped John's hand. Then he handed John the memory shard.

"Take this, and add to it. The progeny of this cycle will study it and know that this was the day that the Reapers were no more. That you brought about the victory."

John left him and continued to wander about, looking for Tali.

Then he found her, next to EDI, and to the right by about twelve feet from where Anderson and Coats were arguing out where the final push to the beam would be. She was looking out and so he signaled EDI who replied, "Commander Shepherd."

Tali turned and walked up to him and embraced him. She was trembling a little. He wasn't sure if it was just fear or just the high state of emotions. He looked into her visor and she looked back to him. Her eyes were just a faint white. He continued to just look at her. What was there to say?  
Finally she spoke

"I . . . Want . . . More . . . Time," she whimpered.

He did too. If only he could do this knowing she would be safe. But she would be by him, as she had been since she had first volunteer to assist in dealing with Saren. Before he had fallen in love with her. Before she had fallen in love with him. Before . . . everything.

"I know," he replied. "What ever happens . . . remember, I love you."

They simply held each other for another moment or two.

"You going to be okay?" he asked.

"I thought I was going to have to ask you that first," she sighed. "Looking at this city of London . . ."

"For you, it was a story told by your parents. For me? It was just two years ago."

She reached up and with one hand linked on to his shoulder. With the other, she gently caressed his face.

"It seemed so easy for you to bring me back to my home world," she said. "Though I know it was crazy hard. If anything I can do helps bring Earth back for you, you know I will do it. Because I love you."

"If only we were genies, and when we rubbed our noses, wishes were granted," he said with a slight smile.

Tali promptly gave his nose a little tweak. He smiled.

"I wish . . ." she began. "I wish . . ." she tried again but her voice was cracking. So she leaned her helmet upon his shoulder and quietly cried for a moment.

"Hey," whispered John. "You going to be okay Mrs. Tali'Shepherd vas Normandy?"

She giggled through her tears. As she looked up he could see the sparkles from the tear drops on her cheeks.

"I remember," she said. "The name vas Normandy was given to me by the Admirals as a bagh of shame. And it was the Normandy which was the reason why we were able to return to our homeworld. Now, it's a bagh of honor. That sudden flip, unknown and unaccounted for, that swift shift and reversal. It . . . It makes me think we'll be okay. Yes, Yahn. I'm okay. Now I'm okay."

He looked at her for another moment. Then EDI, who had been standing by silently observing, judged that sufficient time had passed.

"Shepherd?" asked EDI. "I have a question."

"Is it a big or small one?" asked John.

"It is important," answered EDI. "It's relevance would be diminished at any other time."

"Ask away," said John. He felt Tali's hand upon his shoulder. She was standing behind him, gently touching him. He was glad for the contact.

"In this battle, the Reapers are employing their full capabilities against us. Even though we started with an advantage, that advantage is rapidly diminishing as Harbinger brings in more and more fighting forces. This is consistent with every single major battle we have fought against them. It is consistent because we have never known just how many forces the Reapers can bring to bear on us. My question is this. What makes you think we can reach the Conduit at all?"

"The Reapers have the Citadel. They think they've won. In fact, they never had doubted they would win. That's always the best time to attack," he answered.

"But the Reapers have spies and other intelligence, we have lost the element of surprise. In such a case, we will likely loose."

"Are you afraid?" asked John.

"Our probability for success is greater than any other plan brought to date."

"That's not what I asked," answered John. "Are you afraid?"

"I do not understand the purpose of the question."

"There's no room for doubt any more EDI," elaborated John. "You understand what we have to do, or you don't."

"I am clear on what we must accomplish, Shepherd. The Reapers have destroyed civilization after civilization." EDI paused. "But they have never destroyed ours. Nor will they!"

"Couldn't have put it better myself," said John. "It's just about time to move out."

"Shepherd?" continued EDI. "There is something I want you to know." She waited for John to turn back to face her. "The Illusive Man ordered my creation years ago. Jeff was the one who allowed me to think for myself. But only now do I feel alive. That is your influence."

"Thanks EDI."

"And he made me feel loved," said Tali behind him.

"And she, me," added John smiling.

"Commander?" asked Anderson walking up. John turned and headed over to the table where Major Coats was waiting.

"Our final review of the sitrep," said Anderson.

"How's it look?"

"We've lost a lot of Hammer, and what we haven't is being tied down by more and troops landing and pushing back. We're at 50% of what we hoped to be able to bring for the final push."

"Can we make any minor adjustments? Pull a few extra out from multiple areas and concentrate them here?"

"A few, but not in an appreciable speed. We don't have leisure. Harbinger seems to be pulling in troops from all over Earth. He clearly knows why we are here and he's willing to let other resistance forces push a ways into other cities. We're pretty much at the strongest we're going to be for this last push."

"Then every minute spent here makes the Reapers stronger," concluded John.

"Exactly my thought," replied Anderson. "Everything has already been set up. Shepherd? You will be the center point of the advance. Behind you will be the English 42nd Brigade and then the 2nd Zulu."

"The African Lads," acknowledged Shepherd. That was the nickname of the 2nd Zulu from from South Africa, Zulu-land in fact. They had a martial history which went back several hundred years, but they had won their greatest laurels during the Black Russian Crusade. There wasn't an African boy who did not imagine marching with them in his daydreams of adventure. The 42nd English was likewise a unit with a long history. But their chief laurels had come from the First Contact War.

"To your left will be Wrex's Krant and the Krogan Expiditionary Force

"If I know Wrex, he won't be beside me for long," chuckled John. "That's going to be a very extended flank before he's done."

"On your right, the Turian Wing and Asari Commando forces, and 4th Quarian Combat Engineers."

"The Luonai," added Tali regarding the Quarian unit. "They are well known."

"We anticipate the Turian and Asari will be the nuisance flank," said Major Coats. "Their methodical hunting and biotics will be a constant drain on Reaper forces seeking to keep them from advancing. The Quarian Engineers will act to demolish any serious blocks to their advance. The right will be handled by the Krogan and anything stupid enough to get in their way will be simply crushed. Your job will be to lead the 2nd and 42nd forward for the beam. If everything goes well, units of all the united species will close on the beam at the same time and we'll all go up."

"Of course this is war," added Garrus who was just walking up. "Nothing ever goes well in war."

"We've got no other options of course. We have to drive right through their units and get to that beam," said Anderson. "We have everything nasty and rotten in there which the Reapers have begotten so far in this war. But our real problem will be that Destroyer which is protecting the Beam itself."

"Air support?" asked Major Coats. "Can we bring in Air Support to take that big bug out?"

"There's some sort of jamming frequency which scrambles the panels on the fighters. Makes them impossible to pilot. We're going to have to take it out with ground forces." Anderson began to show specific parts of the city. "Since they were able to re-establish control of the last mile around the beam. They've been methodically tearing down all the buildings to give themselves a free range of fire, a 500 yard no man's land between them and us here. We're going to have to cross that. Petrovsky has come up with a solution for that.

John turned around and saw Oleg coming up. Petrovsky adjusted his Omni-tool and a large shield structure appeared. It looked a bit like a flat metal wall about six meters wide and three meters tall, evenly spaced were small cross slits, perfect for shooting rifles through.

"These are being shipped in as we speak. They are light but generate a collection of very small shields which when combined become far stronger, thus they'll act to fool the Reaper forces. If we advance behind these, along with Mako support, we should be able to cross with minimal casualties," finished Oleg.

"I remember something like that on Omega," observed Garrus. "Didn't Cerberus troops have smaller individual shields they would advance behind?"

"Yes," replied Oleg.

"Those were a challenge to snipe through," added Garrus. "You really made me improve my shooting skills."

"I don't know if I should say, 'You're Welcome' since it was my men you were learning on," chuckled Petrovsky.

"This crazy thing called war," observed Garrus.

"If they're scrambling up the air fighters," observed John. "Do we know where that interference is coming from? If it's the Reaper, we need to take it out with Mako and Arty fire. If it's something else, we take that out and we have fighter support."

"I can start analyzing immediately," suggested EDI.

"And we'll be bringing up the Makos regardless," added Anderson. He sighed. "They know we are coming, and they are piling them in as fast as they can. For many of us, this will be a one way trip. But there's no other option. We advance until we reach the beam. We can not retreat. Is that understood? Coats? Shepherd?"

Both men saluted.

"Shepherd? I'm putting you on point. You're going right down the gullet. I need you for the final push to the beam," added Anderson. "You know the psychology of war. If the men see you press forward and not turn back? They'll follow you right into the maelstrom."

Celebrity status can be a real bitch sometimes, at least in the military.

"I understand," replied Shepherd.

"Your team good and ready?"

"The best, and willing to go."

"You have a minute with them now," finished Anderson. "We meet at the deploy point in five."

John nodded and turned to face his team gathering. His eyes slowly traveled from the left to the right. Liara was standing there, next to Garrus. Then came Kaiden, and Javik. Then there was Tali, and EDI, and then on the right was James. He took a second to think. How many times in the history of man had a commander like him looked at his forces and prepared for an attack like the one they were about to make?

"This war has brought us pain and suffering and loss. But it's also brought us together. As soldiers, allies, and friends. This bond that ties us together is something the Reapers will never understand. It's more powerful than any other weapon, stronger than any ship. It can't be taken or destroyed."

Tali began to edge up to the front, John knew she was wanting to reach out to him.

"The next few hours will decide the fate of every one in the galaxy, every mother, every son."

Now the entire team was gathering around him. He was in the center of a circle, walking past each one of them, looking into their eyes.

"Every unborn child. They are trusting you. Depending on you to win them their future. A future free from the threat of the Reapers. But take heart. Look around you. You are not in this fight alone. We face our enemy together. And together? We will defeat them."

Each member of the team came up and clasped hands with John, and then Tali came up and gave him one final hug. He lingered for a moment, experiencing that unique Quarian style of embrace, where her arms were around his back, and her fingers wrapped around the tops of his shoulders. The first experience he had of her when they had discovered their love for each other and now perhaps, their last. Every one silently and respectfully waited for them to finish.

"Always remember I love you," she whispered to him.

"And never forget my love back to you," he replied.

"We're in the center, leading the point of the V," began John. "Tali is on my six. Javik is on my three, James is on my nine. To the left? Kaiden and EDI, Flank Recon. To my Right? Garrus and Liara, Flank Sniper. Got it?"

"Boo Yah!" cried James and Kaiden.

They moved out, and got behind the cover that marked the start off point. Ahead, the clouds continued to boil and seeth around the beam. He looked at his Omni-tool. It was 0758. It was only October, the sky above should have been several shades brighter for the sun should have been up. Yet it remained dark, the streets were filled with deep shadow, and as John suspected deeper malice. In that mess of rubble were reaper troops, silently waiting. Knowing they had the numbers and fields of fire. But few of them had armor, and fewer still armor and shields. And finally, this was not their home, and moreover, they had nothing to lose.

At 0800 the flairs went up, the Mako artillery opened fire, and there was a deep throated roar from the troops as they charged.

"St Michael!" screamed John.

"San Diego!" shouted Vega.

"Prothea!" cried Javik.

"Rannoch!" cried Tali.

"Thessia!" cried Liara.

"By the Spirits above and below!" shouted Garrus.

"Merry England!" cried the 42nd.

"Zulu!" cried the 2nd.

As for EDI she simply did a quick microsecond calculation as to the sort of screaming noise most likely to sound frightening to a Reaper troop and imitated it. It's fear factor was more than a little successful as Liara literally cringed for a second as EDI uttered it and Garrus stole an open mouthed glance at her before they leapt over the cover rubble and charged forward using Rolling Thunder as a fighting tactic. Behind them, they could hear the English shouting and the 2nd's chanting. John found it fascinating that the Zulu force could maintain a constant chant as they pressed forward. "Zulu!" over and over again. It clearly told the foes they were fighting that they were fully cohesive.

Somewhere in this advancing wave of forces, Anderson was leading a wing, Coats was leading another. John didn't know where either of them was, but he was glad they were there. Then slowly, John became aware of another noise in the battle. It was on his left. It was the advancing Krogan. And it was the most fascinating noise of them all. It was the cheer not of a fighting force, but a fighting force which was happy. A force which was deriving a curious sort of joy as they advanced. John found himself musing that should battle fail. Tuchanka would be the last to fall, for the Krogan would fight tooth and nail down to the last child.

The reaper forces, like the great ships, were various shades of black and thus blended in well with the darkness and shadows of the stricken city. There were ambushes a plenty, but thanks to the shields of the advancing forces, few of them produced lasting damage. John was grateful that his team was so well trained. There were no mistakes being made. As the initial surge slowed down to the block clearing crawl, every last one of them was moving carefully from cover to cover, listening to the sound that marked a reaper gun, honing in on it and taking it out. As they advanced, shooting, ducking, throwing grenades, hearing the screeching screams of banshees and the gargling roar of the cannibals, John would give little glances at his team mates. Of course Garrus, Liara, Kaiden, and EDI were out of visual range. But James was there, looking grim, nodding when their eyes met. Javik's four eyes, simply blinking at him, yet seeming to convey a certain determination. But Tali was the hardest. He could not see her face, and they dared not come in physical contact with one another. They both had to remain focused. It was hard to see her behind him.

Two hours into it, they reached the No Man's Land. John did a quick analysis of the situation. While it was flat and rubble, the Reapers had failed to take scale into account. There was tons of rubble large enough to hide behind through the entire area.

"All units," came Anderson's voice over the public com. "Move through under cover, Engineers, blow pathways for the tanks."

"How the hell are tanks supposed to take out a Destroyer?" cried one voice.

"Thanix missiles can do a fuckton of damage," replied a woman either bragging or slightly annoyed.

"Did you think up that adjective all by yourself or did you have help?" asked another man's voice.

"Cut the chatter," ordered Anderson.

"Concentrate the fire," thought John. "Like the fleet is doing up top."

"Wait two minutes for us to get the shields deployed," said Oleg.

So for a couple of moments the team remained along the edge of the no-man's land. Garrus kept busy however, Liara kept noting targets and the crack of a Widow would remind John that his Right Wing was still fully operational.

Then John turned around and almost panicked. A fire team of men in Cerberus armor was bringing up a set of long shields. John, catching himself, motioned to the left and right.

"Shields in place," said Oleg two minutes later.

"Proceed" ordered Anderson.

And a wall of white, with gold and black trim began to advance forward blazing like Rolling Thunder while John's team moved from cover to cover crossing the 500 meters of no man's land which the Reapers had hoped would give their units fields of fire.

"My analysis of the disruption interference which is keeping the fighters at bay seems to be concentrated near the beam," reported EDI. "We won't be able to use them until we get close enough to the beam to narrow down the location."

"Never thought it would be that easy," replied John.

The Reaper forces, realizing that the shields and cover were negating their fields of fire, decided to employ their usual tactic, and charged forward by the thousands. As they came out of the buildings, they looked like a boiling black wave. The Krogan cries of enthusiasm were so loud that John could hear them over the chants of the Zulus.

"Spiders!" whimpered Tali.

John looked forward, and there were thousand of those small little rachni skuttlers moving like a black shadow in front of the boiling advance of the reaper troops.

"Shotguns out!" ordered John, and the team lined up behind cover and began to blast them away.

"We're killing Rachni children," snarled John.

"Did I not say this was a Reaper trick?" replied Javik.

"Yeah you did," answered John. "It just hit me though right now."

The husks hit the shields first, though the rolling thunder withering fire took out thousands of them before they had reached that line. And then John saw the most amazing sight. The 2nd suddenly materialized Omni-spears of a curious wide teardrop bladed shape and pointed oval shields which they employed with gusto on the fighting husks, still crying Zulu over and over again.

"The 2nd's washing their spears," commented Major Coats over the public com.

A set of explosions behind the team marked the clearing of several sections of rubble which enabled the makos and tanks to push into no man's land and begin to provide artillery support for the advancing teams.

"Front Freeze!" commanded Anderson.

And the entire advancing line of shields and teams in cover held their position while the Makos and Tanks opened up. Suddenly the entire area between the team and the line of buildings which marked no man's land was filled with explosions and bright flashes of light. Reaper forces were caught in the firestorm and died by the thousands. And then through the explosions, the cheering of the 42nd could be heard.

"Yeah," said James. He turned to John and grinned. "San Diego's rain!"

"Gonna need one hell of an umbrella then," commented John.

The smoke cleared and all that was left in no man's land between them and the buildings was a smoking layer of green slime and goo.

"Forward," commanded Anderson.

And they pressed on into the buildings.

"We have fields of fire down the streets!" cried one forward company. "Our vehicles can't advance without getting drilled!"

"Front teams advance and take out those anti-tank guns before the tanks advance," ordered Anderson.

"That's us," suggested Shepherd to his team. And they moved into the first building. But not before John stole a look at the beam. It seemed to be only a few blocks away.

"Don't forget," advised Major Coats. "The buildings are giving us cover but giving them places to hide."

It was room to room, ducking down hallways, looking around corners with omni-tool periscopes. John and his team spotted a battery of Anti-tank rapid fire guns and took them out. He signaled from the position and a platoon of vehicles came rolling up the streets.

As they pressed closer and closer to the destroyer, different teams began to get more pressure. Several companies simply ceased to exist, getting overwhelmed in a crossfire situation before their support companies could extract them. But they were close enough to the destroyer now that it could lend it's support fire. But even with the losses, even with the sudden cries of terror, the overall atmosphere was getting more and more jubilant. Everyone, from all angles of the approach, was seeing the beam down the streets. No matter where Hammer was approaching from, be it north, south, east, or west, they were down to the last few blocks. Then the first tank barrage took out a landing transport full of Reaper troops and John knew it was down to the last push. The Destroyers response was to line up it's beam and it proceeded to melt two of the three tanks in that platoon but it seemed a mere gesture of futility. The Thanix missiles were now being deployed. Two fired and promptly flew out of control, crashing nearby. Suddenly it seemed as if the Destroyer wasn't going to be an easy target after all.

"EDI any more analysis on what's interfering with the tracking?" asked John. He and his team were on the third story of what had been a skyscraper, but was now just a concrete shell with floors and some functioning stairwells.

"The Reaper keeps jamming my frequencies," answered EDI. "It seems to be aware that I am present and is targeting me personally. I am returning the consideration but it seems to be better at me than this. However it is also trying to indoctrinate me and I am mocking it's efforts which is causing it to divert more and more of it's functions towards that goal."

"Be careful EDI," advised John, somewhat worried.

"I will Shepherd. I have free will and am free of all Reaper nanobots. In addition I have adapted Mordin's nanobots from his inoculation serum into my physiology and that has proven most advantageous since the nanobots are independent of my core functions but are able to spot and correct any deviations in them."

"Bless you Mordin, even now you still fight for us," commented Shepherd.

"I miss him too," replied Tali. "Except for that time he dangled that spider in my face."

"He liked your chocolate though," replied Garrus.

"Not funny Garrus! That's my favorite kind of chocolate and Yahn had gotten it special for me."

"Then why did you shove it into his face?"

"How else was I going to get rid of that spider? I didn't have my shotgun out!"

"Battery Seven, the Destroyer has spotted us, firing missiles!"

"Hold," replied Major Coats.

"Negatory, beam just destroyed battery, firing second!"

"Any damage?"

"Negatory, missiles flew out of control!"

"Battery Twelve here, we're being overrun!"

"Company Bravo on it's way! Status?"

There was silence. John pushed towards the last reported location of the battery, and ten minutes later his team rounded a corner and saw what was left of the Thanix battery being chewed apart and eaten, literally, by about four dozen cannibals. John's team opened up with a rolling thunder and in three minutes there was nothing left of the cannibals.

"Cannibals explode in a very satisfactory manner," observed Javik while Tali dashed up and began an examination of the two missile batteries.

"They are ready to fire, commander," she chirped over her com.

"Shepherd here, we are at Battery Twelve, unit was overrun with no survivors, but equipment was recaptured intact. Waiting for EDI's analysis on reason for missile failure."

"It's calibration I'm sure of it," commented Garrus over the com.

"Commander?" began EDI. "I've found it. It's the beam. The beam is what distorts the tracking and piloting. So long as the Destroyer stays within 250 meters of the beam, nothing can hit it. I am reporting this information across all bands now."

"All companies are prepping Thanix missiles," reported Major Coats.

"We have to pull him out then," muttered John. "Major Coats?" he called on the Com, "Can you get the tanks to make a Cantabrian maneuver on the streets according to the coordinates I'm uploading? If you can do that I think we can pull the Reaper towards us and get him out of the interference radius of the beam. I've got four missiles here ready to go."

"Broadcast the points," replied Major Coats.

Calling up a map of this section of London, John did a quick analysis and put down the points.

"Got it," reported Coats. "Give me three to get three platoons in position."

"We have reapers forces closing in," reported Liara.

"Form a perimeter!" shouted John.

The team rapidly circled around the battery throwing down what light cover they could before a wave of reaper troops and one banshee came out of a nearby building. It was a nasty fight for about three minutes. Banshees were brutal and Liara in particular hated them. But no Banshee had ever survived three direct head shots from Garrus and this one got five. John checked his omni-tool, it was 1217. They had spent a total of four hours approaching the beam. And yet, it wasn't any lighter. The sun was supposed to be overhead. But the cloud cover was just as black as it had been at 0800.

"Platoons in position!" reported Coats. "Commence Cantabrian."

Cantabrian was a very rare maneuver in modern warfare, but it had it's origins back in ancient fighting when calvary would ride by a stationary target, throw slings or javelins or fire bows, crossbows, or later on, wheellock pistols and keep riding by in a wide circle using the time away from the enemy to reload. The constant motion made it hard to hit the horse or the rider. It was an excellent counter to the phalanx or maniple. The tanks did essentially the same thing, but they were depending on the cover of the buildings for the effect. What happened was this, a tank would cross the street which the reaper was down, about 100 meters. The tank would fire it's main gun at the Reaper as it drove by and by the time the Reaper could get it's beam into position, the tank had already crossed the line of fire and was back in cover behind another building. Then another tank would roll by one block further down and fire into the Reaper, and again be in cover, then a third tank would roll by one block closer, and so one. The Reaper didn't know which tank would pop out or from which direction they would be driving. Likewise, since every tank was being driven by a human there was no way that the Reaper could know when the next tank was going to pop out since there was that random human element being introduced. Each tank simply drove across the street, down a block, turned to the left or right, and lined up to cross another street. It was a very deadly type of whack a mole. These moles were shooting big guns with very large rounds. There was only one thing that the Reaper could do, and that was to come down the street and take those tanks out. After all, when you are big and bad and can't be hurt by anything, you simply go to where the annoyance is and incinerate it with your big red hot reaper beam.

Problem was EDI knew exactly when the the Destroyer left the radius of the beam and Team Normandy was there to launch the four Thanix missiles which proceeded to go right for the Destroyer's beam orifice. There was an awful lot of damage. And then everything else in the vicinity opened up and in a matter of seconds, the Reaper, making those electronic rough grinding shrieks that came from suddenly discovering that it was in fact, just as mortal as any other material being, was rendered a smoldering ruin on the ground.

"No fair, Shepherd," shouted Wrex over the public com. "Hogging all the big booms! That was my Destroyer!"

"You get the next one," promised John laughing.

Cheering and shouting, the tens of thousands of soldiers of Hammer charged forward, riddling with personal weapon's fire what was left of the Reaper forces in the thin band of buildings around the great wide ring which the Reapers had constructed to ease transfer of men and materials from the citadel to London in which center was the beam.

"Yahn! We're going to make it! We're going to win! We're going to go home to Rannoch!"

And then everyone stopped in stunned silence.

"I'm not going to hold you to your promise Shepherd," said Wrex over the com. "'Cause I don't think we have a big enough Thresher Maw handy. But it was a very nice gesture on your part to save the biggest one for me."

For suddenly, it didn't matter that there were tens of thousands within a 100 meters of the beam. It didn't matter that there were dozens of makos and tanks. It didn't matter at all.

For a 100 story tall Reaper named Harbinger had just landed by the beam.


	38. Chapter 38 - Spectre's Ghost

"Yahn!" whimpered Tali. "It's yust not fair!"

"Okay Hammer listen up!" came Anderson's voice over the public com. "No one said it was going to be easy. And if there's been on thing that has been the rule in this war is that there's always another Reaper to make life hell for us. But there is your goal. Get into that beam and the war is over. That's Harbinger, but there's only one of him. We rush him, and he can't stop us all. Our lives for the all the galaxy's lives. It's a fair exchange. Courage."

"Team Normandy is leading the charge," added John in his N7 drill tone. Wusses and women can hide in the buildings."

"The Krogan are going to leave Team Normandy in the dust. All that is a trainee's obstacle course," added Wrex.

"If the Krogan think they are going to show up the Turian Wing . . . " commented the Primarch, who was leading that section of Hammer.

"ZULU!" and the second surged forward.

"Damned if those darkies show us off!" grumbled Major Coats. "Forty Second! Charge into Glory!"

And within a matter of seconds, the entire ring was closing in.

"Shepherd," boomed Harbinger. "Your efforts are pathetic and futile." And he opened up with his beam and swept a fourth of the ring.

One can run a magnifying glass with focused sunlight over a marching column of ants and the number you kill in the sweep is not that great, but the confusion created by the sudden death from above sends the column into a frenzy and often it breaks up after a few such sweeps. And so Harbinger began to sweep the ring. And each time exploding vehicles, burning soldiers, intense heat, and screams of pain sent confusion and fear into the ranks. It was a race against death.

It was a charge that is the sort remembered in song and story. Be it like the Charge of the Light Brigade in the Crimean War, or like Pickett's Charge at Gettysburg, it was remembered because it was catastrophic. For the 2nd, it was a charge into eternity for none of them came back from it to tell their villages of the glory. But for John, the moment came when a sweep from Harbinger hit the mako in front of him which exploded and flipped over in the air, landing right behind him.

"GOD NOT TALI!" he screamed.

He dashed around the burning wreckage and found her on the ground, her suit a patchwork of punctures and tears, of blood from a dozen wounds.

"Yahn," she uttered, struggling to get up.

"Normandy?" called John on his Comm. "Do you copy? I need an evac! Tali's hurt bad!"

For a few seconds, all was surreal, the explosions around him, the shouts of defiance, Harbinger's booming voice boasting.

"Do you read me commander?" came Joker's voice over the comm. "Dr. Chakwas is already alerted."

"Yahn! I can still come. Don't leave me Yahn!"

"James? Javik?"

"Understood Loco, Sparks will be taken care of, patched up for you when you come back."

There was a roar and the Normandy hovered right there in defiance of Harbinger. Harbinger however was busy incinerating Krogan who were proving remarkably stubborn about breaking up or cringing in horror.

"Yahn! Please don't leave me! Please Yahn!"

"Tali!" said John firmly but with a struggle to keep his voice from cracking. "You gotta get out of here!"

"I can't stay behind," cried Tali.

"Don't argue with me Tali!" snapped John. He was having a hard enough time as it was. Seeing her that badly wounded, wondering if she would last an hour before allergic reactions put her into toxic shock.

"Don't leave me behind . . ." she continued, weakly, weepy.

"I need you to make it out of here alive, Kitten. I need to know . . . you're home." He caressed her helmet cloth covering, looking as closely into her visor as he could.

"I'm already home," she sobbed. "Come back to me?"

John turned to see Harbinger aligning himself for another sweep across the ring. Normandy looked as if it might be in that swath.

"GO!" he shouted.

"Yahn!" she cried as he turned and charged once more for the beam "Yahn! Come back to me!"

The Normandy took off, and Joker veered the ship out of Harbinger's direct vision, making certain that the swath would not strike the ship. John turned to watch the ship veer away and then pulled forward, running as fast as he could for the beam, struggling to suppress the grief, struggling to remember that fear for Tali would compromise his combat capabilities, struggling to do Garrus right.

But it wasn't enough quickly enough. He thought he was ducking when the beam came right at him.

He wasn't.

Pain . . . Searing Pain . . . His whole body on fire pain. Struggling to reach for the pistol on the ground next to him. Crackling static, orders to regroup. Hammer was decimated. Fall back to the ring, prepare for another charge. Take cover. And the pain. The pain, the constant pain. Pain to hold the pistol. Pain to get up. Pain to stagger for the beam. Pain to fire at a couple of husks who were charging him.

"Why am I alive?" He thought. "That was almost a direct hit. Why am I able to still be going? Why am I not a maimed casualty?"

And then the memory came. The sweet memory of a soft chirpy alto voice saying, "I've increased the Medi-gel capacity by 25%. And since . . ." And here her voice got softer, and it no longer sounded like it was coming through her visor translator. It sounded like she was gently whispering into his ear while they lay together in their bed. "since you never turn your back on an enemy, I moved some of the armor plating which has never been hit in the back to the front so you're more protected."

Her first Christmas. Her first Christmas present to him. She had retooled his N7 Armor. The Armor he had been buried in. The Armor Miranda Lawson had taken and stored for him. The Armor he had persistently worn because it had been so good. Armor that she had worked on as they had fought together, through Ilos, through the Citadel, through the Cerberus missions, and through the hell that had been the Reaper war.

She had saved his life.

And for a split second, such was the depression of grief, he wished she hadn't. He wished he was dead again, because he was certain she would be dead within the hour.

But he had just stepped into the beam. And found himself in the Citadel. In a scene cut out of a horror vid.

As for the Normandy, Joker was already back in stealth, hovering as close to the beam as he could get, trying to see if anything had made it through. Then three more Reapers landed, and now covered all possible approaches to the beam. It looked as if all the efforts of Hammer had failed. And then Anderson's voice came through. He had gotten through and was in the Citadel. And one other person had as well, though Anderson did not know who it was yet. Joker however, was certain.

"Tell Dr. Chakwas that Shepherd made it into the beam, so she can tell Tali," he broadcast into the medical bay.

"All fleets, converge on the Crucible," came Admiral Hackett's orders. "Protect it at all costs."

"Come on," whispered Joker. "Come on."

Tali was carried into the medical bay by James and Javik. Karin took one look at the suit and shook her head.

"You have to save her!" insisted James.

"It might have been more militarily prudent to leave her behind," suggested Javik. "For in trying to save her we have deprived the Commander of two more soldiers."

"Of course I'm going to try to save her," said Karin. "But her suit is so badly ruptured she can't be treated here."

"What hospital is there on Earth which isn't destroyed by the Reapers?" cried Javik.

"There is no hospital on Earth which will work either," said Karin. All the while she was directing the two of them to get Tali upon a trundle where she was laid down. Tali kept whimpering "Not Yahn, please Rannoch not Yahn!"

"We can't go back to Rannoch. It would take days of travel. She'll be dead by then," observed Javik. "It would have been better to give her a pain killer, put her behind some cover, and leave her. We might have made it into the beam."

Karin simply rolled Tali out of the Medical Bay.

"Doctor? Where are you taking her?" asked James.

"To the Captain's Cabin," replied Karin. "She's completely adapted to it. I can remove her suit safely there and treat her. Now if you two will kindly grab the following items . . ." And she proceeded to give the two soldiers a list of items in the medical bay which, being soldiers, they looked at each other dumfounded, and then began to search the medical bay for the items on the list, which were of course, in clearly marked drawers which they took a while to figure out could be read.

Karin in the meanwhile had gotten the trundle into the elevator, and rode it up. She placed her finger over her ear and activated her com link.

"Gabby? Ken? I'm going to need your engineering talents for the repair of Tali's suit. It's got multiple punctures and has lost all integrity. I'm going to need it repaired asap if she's got any real chance of recovery."

"So you're saying that I'm finally gonna be able to say I've gotten inta Tali's pants? OW! GABBY! Me Arm!"

"You are such a dog, Ken!"

Karin sighed.

"I can assist," offered Bytes over the ship's intercom.

"Bytes?" asked Karin. It was the first time he had addressed her directly, though she had heard him make comments about Underground Shooter when Joker was chatting with him.

"Bytes is correct," added EDI, who's facial features had just materialized on the intercom board in the captain's cabin as Karin was adjusting the trundle. "He studied Tali's suit textures and construct when he was bored one afternoon and his intelligence is sufficient to have mastered all it's intricacies."

"Alright Bytes," said Karin, as she began to unlatch the suit and work Tali out of it. "Work your magic and let's get this girl all back in shape for . . . Her Yahn." She turned to Tali who was now looking up at her, somewhat groggy from the shock of the multiple lacerations and the sedative and pain killer Karin had administered. "I've forgotten the very sweet face you have dear. I hope you won't mind if I take a few liberties getting you patched up. I'll have a sheet on you in a moment . . . there." She continued.

Having Tali covered over with a sheet, she called James and Javik and demanded to know what was taking them so long to fetch a handful of items from a collection of clearly marked drawers and cupboards. Then she signaled Joker.

"Joker? If you can get a message to Commander Shepherd, tell him Tali is stabilized and being treated in their cabin where I expect a full recovery with nothing more than a few scars."

She commenced with the anti-allergens on her face, hands, body, and over the sheet she had just applied to Tali. They shouldn't be to necessary, but it would reduce Tali's discomfort from any foreign particles which she might be introducing by her presence. The real challenge now began, namely dealing with those bits of Mako which were lodged in her skin and muscle mass. Tali's body temperature was already starting to climb, no febrifuges just yet, but Karin was expecting those two men . . . Where where they? . . . to bring them up any moment now.

John Shepherd, like Tali, was lying down. But he was on the Citadel, and there was no doctor attending to his burns and wounds. Only the medi-gel, slowly administering to what sections of his body those functional parts of his armor could treat. There was still pain, but it was slowly diminishing.

"Shepherd?" came a voice over the com.

John groaned as he tried to get up.

"Shepherd?" came the voice again.

"Anderson?" answered John. He scanned the room or place he was in. It was red tint, like the alleyway he had rescued Tali in, what seemed so long ago. All around him were dead bodies, and the occasional keeper busy scuttling around taking the bodies away, one at a time. There was something just plain creepy about it, though it was, given that it was just keepers doing their job, perfectly ordinary. It was the mass of death that the place held. The sheer numbers of corpses which made things seem more horrific.

"You up here too?" asked John.

"I followed you up, but we didn't come out at the same place," answered Anderson. "At least I don't think we did. What's your surrounding look like?"

That was a loaded question if there was any. What was he to say? A charnel house? A tomb? A scene from a class B horror vid? He had no idea where he was, only that he was surrounded by death. John simply groaned.

"You okay?" asked Anderson.

"Is this a trick question?" asked John's mind. He was in burning pain, amazed that he was able to function at all. "I feel like death," he answered. "But I'm moving" And indeed he was, carefully picking his way through the corpses and he walked forward, trying to find a way to get to Anderson, as well as the controls for opening up the arms of the Citadel before the Reapers figured out they had gotten this far and closed to destroy the Crucible. "It's dark," he continued. "There's human remains scattered."

"Sounds familiar," came Anderson's voice in a whisper. "I'm in a dark hallway. Reminds me of your description of the Collector Base."

"Makes sense," answered John.

"You think they're making a Reaper here?" asked Anderson.

"Sure," replied John. "They round them up on Earth, process them, and send that up here."

"Damned Abominations," whispered Anderson's voice, still over the com for there was no sight of him. "I'm going to keep moving. The sooner we blow those bastards back to hell the better." He paused for a few seconds. "The corpses are ending now. But where the hell are we?"

"Yeah, it doesn't look like any part of the Citadel I've been to," answered John. He continued to stagger, like a drunkard from the pain and injuries down the tunnel he was in.

"Whoa!" whispered Anderson. "One of the walls here just re-aligned itself. The place is shifting, changing . . . There's a chasm here. And more hallways like the one I was in."

Suddenly the tunnel opened up and John found himself stepping into a new area, this one lit better.

"I think I'm near an exit," he said. He still found bodies scattered about, but now there was a definitive pathway he could follow. The rooms were opening up, looking more and more like the Presidium.

"I see something up ahead," observed Anderson. He was still speaking through the com since John had no sight of him. "Might be a way to cross over."

"Don't get too far ahead of me!" snapped John. He was feeling very alone and the place, in spite of the brighter lights, it was still creeping him out. He was not only struggling with the grief of thinking Tali was dying on the Normandy, he was also struggling with the idea of him dying at the hands of the Reapers. The Keepers remained busy at their normal tasks, well no they were not, they were merely wandering about, slowly picking up the bodies. That in itself was giving him the shivers. None of them were at their usual places, making those persistent adjustments on their omni-terminals which were scattered about the place. In fact, John could not see a single terminal at all. He had thought they were every where.

"Where do you think you're at?" asked Anderson.

"I just found that chasm you were talking about," replied John.

"Hold on!" said Anderson. "I see something! A control panel maybe. I'm just going to go on ahead."

"Anderson?" asked John. For there was suddenly static. "Damn it!" he groused. There was no response. Something was interfering with their communications now. He was, for all intents and purposes, completely alone. He reached the top of an incline and suddenly things were opening up. And he saw Anderson ahead of him. A wide view of the closed panels of the Citadel, and bolts of energy flashing over head. It was still very surreal in a frightening way, but it was looking more familiar. It was as if each spasm of terror was being gently numbed. As John came up, he could see Admiral Anderson working on the panel.

"Anderson!" said John.

Anderson, himself obviously staggered in some fashion, managed to turn around and face John.

"Shepherd!" he said. And then he began to wobble and it was clear that something else was happening. "I can't . . ."

John felt a presence behind him. He turned, and saw what both surprised, and yet did not surprise him.

It was the Illusive Man, looking grim, half machine, and cruel. Of all the people to meet. John had no doubt that the only reason why he was here was because the Reapers no longer regarded him as a threat. And no doubt his indoctrination had reached a point where he was unaware of this very telling fact.

"I underestimated you Shepherd," began Tim. John was able to catch a glimpse of that face, no long the rugged refined middle aged features which were pleasing to look upon, which conveyed intelligence, power, and passion. Half the face was covered in circuitry.

"What?" gasped John. For he himself was no longer able to move either. Something was taking over his body, and controlling it.

"I warned you," said Tim. "Control is the means to survival." It was an ironic statement given that they were within minutes of defeating the Reapers, if the Crucible was in place. Even now, Tim simply refused to consider their option. Even now, he was trying to sabotage them. And what John found himself not surprised over was that the Reaper technology had probably given Tim the power to seize their bodies on some level. And likewise Tim, flush with this new god like power, was likewise blinded to the fact that he was directly assisting the Reapers. "Control of the Reapers, and of you if necessary!"

"They are controlling you!" Anderson said, struggling to pronounce each word.

"I don't think so Admiral," replied Tim. After all, he had his new god like powers, which were one step closer to Reaper dominance, and the indoctrination had shut down those crucial bits of date in his brain which would have enabled him to see that he was in fact, the tool.

"Controlling me is a lot different than controlling a Reaper," replied John. It was of course a patently obvious statement but he hoped it might jar something loose in Tim. Their only hope of success now hinged on dealing with Tim's own ideological lusts and his indoctrinated blindness to them.

"Have a little faith," replied Tim. "When humanity discovered the Mass Relays, when we learned there was more to the galaxy than we imagined, there were some who thought the Relays should be destroyed. They were scared of what we'd find. Terrified of what we might let in. But look at what humanity has achieved. Since that discovery we've advanced more than the past 10,000 years combined!"

It was a complete misunderstanding of the idea of advancement, for it failed to take into account all the ground work and foundational principles which were necessary for humanity to have gotten to the Mass Relays, but such was the short sightedness of Tim, who only was seeing what he (and the Reapers) wanted (him) to see.

"And the Reapers will do the same for us again," he continued. "A thousand fold! But . . ."

John began to struggle to regain his own control but it spite of every effort of his will, his hand brought up his pistol and aimed it at Anderson. Anderson was able to raise one hand to ward it off.

". . . only if we harness their ability to control," continued Tim.

"Bullshit!" whispered Anderson, struggling to get a word out. "We destroy them, or they destroy us."

"And waste this opportunity?" queried Tim. "Never!"

"You're playing with things you don't understand," John was able to get out. How to explain, when your body is under dominion of something else, that everything about the Reapers was designed to indoctrinate, that the very technology itself was designed to seduce and control, that all of it was poison. All of it was cancer. "With power you shouldn't be able to use."

"I . . ." said Tim, somewhat hesitatingly. " . . . don't believe that."

Of course not, he didn't want to believe that. John could see that clear enough.

"If we can control it, why shouldn't it be ours?" he asked.

"Because it's poison, it's cancer, it's designed to take control of any organic which tries to employ it!" exclaimed John. "You can't use it without it using you back and fully controlling you in the end."

"One Ring to Rule them all,  
One Ring to find them,  
One Ring to take them all,  
And in the darkness bind them."

"Fairy Tales? No," replied Tim. "This is the way humanity must evolve."

He was employing a false dilemma, either do it his way or die. Ergo we had to do it his way.

"There's always another way," struggled Anderson.

"I've dedicated my life to understanding the Reapers," argued Tim. "And I know with certainty that the Crucible will allow me to control them."

"And then what?" gasped John.

"Look at the power they wield!" replied Tim. "Look at what they can do!"

Tim, clenched his fist, biotic power manifested itself around that fist, and John found his finger squeezing the trigger of his pistol and hitting Anderson in the belly.

"I see what they did to you," snarled John. Tim had once again shown his utter disdain for human life. The man who claimed to be all about the advancement of humanity, was not afraid to destroy it's individual components to get what he wanted. Which meant of course that in the end, he would destroy all of humanity, piece by piece. Which was of course what the Reapers were doing.

"I took what I wanted from them, made it my own! This isn't about me or you! It's about things so much bigger than all of us!"

Which of course is what you say when you want to justify killing people in your way.

"He's wrong!" groaned Anderson, still being held up by Tim's power in spite of the fact that he had a bullet in him. "Don't listen to him!"

"And who will you listen to Shepherd?" asked Tim. "And old soldier stuck in his ways, only able to see the world down the barrel of a gun? And what if he's wrong? What if controlling the Reapers is the answer?"

"If we destroy the Reapers," answered John. "This ends today! But if you can't control them . . ."

"But I can!" cried Tim.

"Are you willing to bet humanities existence on it?"'

"I know it will . . . work!" said Tim, struggling now. Once again, John sensed the same struggle he had seen in Saren. The Reapers were sensing doubt in their puppet and were starting to put the pressure on.

"You can't . . . can you?" observed John. He knew what Tim was going through, he had seen it before. "They won't let you do it. They know you are thinking that. They've known since the beginning! You're like the Protheans and the Inusannon, the same trick was used on them too!"

"No! I'm in control!" screamed Tim. "No one is telling me what to do!"

"Listen to yourself," gasped Anderson. "You're indoctrinated!"

"No! No! The two of you so self-righteous! Do you think power like this comes easy? There are sacrifices!"

"You've sacrificed others first, and yourself the least," answered John.

"Shepherd! I only wanted to protect humanity! The crucible can control them! I know it can! I just . . ."

"It's not too late," suggested Shepherd, struggling to get every word out. "Let us go! We'll do the rest."

"I . . . I can't do that Commander," said Tim.

"Of course you can't," uttered Anderson, still dancing like a marionette in spite of his bullet wound. "They own you now."

"You'ld undo everything I've accomplished," concluded Tim, reaching for Anderson's pistol and pulling it out. I won't let that happen."

"Because of you, humanity is already undone," said John.

"That's not true!" cried Tim.

"They have the citadel," replied John. "They've got us fighting each other, instead of fighting them."

"I just need to . . ." shouted Tim.

"You've done exactly what the Reapers have wanted!" snapped John. "And you're still doing it because the Reapers are controlling you."

"I . . . They're too strong!" groaned Tim.

"You're stronger!" suggested John. "Don't let them win. Break their hold. Don't let them control you."

"I tried Shepherd!" said Tim and he raised his pistol to his own head.

And suddenly John realized he was free. In a microsecond he realized that Tim's control over him had been broken. That in some fashion or other, Tim had only been permitted to operate with impunity in order to bring him to that moment of decision. And John had no intention of letting Tim commit suicide. He knew what fate awaited Tim on the other side. Tim needed time to free himself. There was a lot of stupid that needed fixing in Tim. John's hand shifted and his pistol fired. He fired once into Tim's left shoulder. He fired a second into Tim's right shoulder. Then he fired into Tim's left knee, and then his right knee. Tim fell to the ground, his pistol skittering across the floor.

John looked at Tim, who was on the ground close to complete shock, almost immobilized by the pain he was experiencing. Pain he had never had to experience before.

"The problem with being rich and powerful," said John, facing Tim, now free and speaking clearly, while Anderson half fell, half lowered himself to the floor holding his belly, "is that you can protect yourself from pain and suffering. You can shield yourself from the consequences of your own bad decisions, and so lacking the hard experience that suffering grants the rest of humanity, you fall far faster and quicker for the errors and evils which ordinary people get cured of during their lives." John looked at Tim's stunned face. "Likewise, that pain is shorting out any Reaper dominance. They can't take you over while you are in such pain, they have to wait until you're dead for that. Saren tried to kill himself, and was completely taken over afterwards. You won't because you are still alive, but the pain will prevent you from doing anything to assist the Reapers. It will also enable us to stop them, and when they are stopped, you will be freed."

Tim merely lay there. He made some effort to move, but for him, pain was such an alien thing, it completely overwhelmed him. His high powered cybernetics would have enabled him to completely control his body in spite of the deliberately maiming shots of Shepherd, but the pain simply was more than he could handle.

John was able to stagger over to the control panel, and in a matter of seconds, was able to make the adjustments which caused the panels to begin to open. He had done this before, what had seemed like forever once upon a time. Just a few days after Tali had told him she loved him. He began to feel the tears form in his eyes. He could grieve now as he looked down upon the Earth. He also was able to see the Crucible moving into docking position. The fleets were there waiting. It was almost done. It was almost finished.

"This is it everyone," came Hackett's voice over the public com. "The arms are opening."

And the Crucible, shedding it's protective armor covering, moved into position and docked as if it had always been made to be united with the Citadel. It was like clockwork. It was like two dancers in unison. It was like two lovers embracing. And John once again began to think of Tali, and weep.

"Ten seconds to contact," said Hackett. And then ten seconds later . . . "That's it. The Crucible is docked."

John, hearing Anderson groan behind him, staggered back and lay down next to Anderson. His work was over he thought. Now maybe he could die next to Anderson, and greet Tali at the gate and the two of them could have their happy ending, in heaven, where there would never been any pain or sorrow again. It was the perfect time to die. They would grieve for him of course, there would be memorials and monuments, and the nice thing about that was that because he would be dead, there would be nothing he could say or do that would make the public turn on him and curse him. They would speak highly of him for as long as his deeds were remembered. He would pass into the pantheon of human heroes. It was as Solon had put it once upon a time back on the Ionian Coast of Turkey, speaking to the richest man on Earth at the time, King Croesus.

_"Never call a man happy until he's dead,_  
_Before then he's only lucky."_

And as King Croesus would, a few short years later, lose his lands, homes, wealth, and crown in a single battle, and spend the rest of his life a servant of Emperor Cyrus of the Persians, Croesus well knew how true Solon was. So John was more than happy to die, right then and there. He wouldn't have to worry about being lucky any more. After all, he had gone from Ordinary Soldier, to Galactic Hero, to Pain in the Tush, to Dead, to Terrorist, to Savior of Humanity, to Prisoner, to Commander of the Galaxy in just four short years. So let him return to dead, and put an end to it.

But . . . It didn't happen. Life can be sucky that way.

"Commander?" began Anderson weakly.

"We did it," sighed Shepherd.

"Yes," said Anderson in a breath filled whisper. "We did. It's . . . quite a view."

Shepherd managed a pain wracked laugh. "Best seats in the house," he observed.

"Seems like years, since I just sat down," groaned Anderson.

"I think you've earned a rest," suggested Shepherd. "Anderson?"

"Mmmmm?" offered Anderson.

"Stay with me," asked Shepherd. "We're almost through this." Now that he was seated next to Anderson, he didn't want Anderson to die and leave him alone.

"You did good son," suggested Anderson. "You did good. I'm . . . proud of you."

"Thank you sir," said John. "Anderson?"

But Admiral Anderson had nothing more to say. For Admiral Anderson was dead. He had apparently, finished his job. And John apparently, had not. He was alone. He looked at his left hand. It was covered in blood. His blood, still fresh and wet. The Medi-gel had done a lot of work. He was not in half as much pain as he had remembered earlier, but he suspected he was still compromised in so many fashions. It hadn't helped that he had been fighting Tim's dominance over him for all those crucial minutes. Fighting to prevent a shooting which clearly had proven to be a murder. For Anderson was dead from that bullet. John looked at Tim, and felt a brief spasm of anger, but reminded himself that Tim had, in the end, faced the truth. He had, in the end, tried to resolve it like Saren. It was, given the situation, a 'rational' decision. But like so much else of the Reaper technology, even in death you could not escape the trap. Tim might hate him for the rest of his life for the pain he was suffering from now, but? To bad. Tim wasn't going anywhere soon, and once the Crucible fired, and the Reapers were destroyed, the Alliance was going to have a nice long chat with Tim. Who was no longer as illusive as he had been once upon a time.

"Shepherd?" came Admiral Hackett's voice over the public com. "Commander?"

"I . . . Uh," began Shepherd, suddenly exhausted from all the pain and stress. "What do you need me to do?"

"Nothing's happening!" insisted Hackett. "The Crucible is not firing!"

John began to struggle to reach the control panel. He was so tired. He was so weak. It was as if his body was no longer wanting to respond.

"It's got to be something on your end," continued Hackett.

"Commander Shepherd?" asked Hackett.

"I don see . . ." began Shepherd. "I'm not sure how ta . . ."

"Commander?" asked Hackett, more concerned.

But Shepherd did not hear him. Shepherd had passed out.

Tali was in a fevered delirium, she was dreaming. In one moment she was being held by her mother who was doing heelrou. Another she was nursing her own baby, a little brown haired Quarian girl that her Yahn was calling Alice. She was the one doing heelrou. Then she was in a hospital bed on the Citadel being treated for a wound from a polonium round. Then she was making love to Yahn. Then she heard Karin's voice, far off, like through a thick glass window. "Yahn made it to the beam. Yahn made it to the Citadel with Anderson. Yahn opened the panels. Your Yahn is going to come back to you. Hold on!"

Dr. Karin Chakwas was swearing under her breath. Tali's fever was up to 105° and nothing was bringing it down. James, covered in sterilized rubber and plastic, was rubbing Tali's face with alcohol while Karin was waiting for a chance to administer another febrifuge. How many bits of shrapnel were in this girl? It seemed that there were dozens. The big ones had been gotten out first, easy enough, but there were numerous splinters of smaller variety and Tali was reacting to them just as radically as she had been reacting to the bigger ones. And Karin had thought this was going to be so easy.

"Doc? Is she going to make it?"

"I'm going to do everything I can . . ." replied Karin.

"I thought you said . . ."

"I said and thought wrong. It's one thing to know these things as a theory, it's quite another to have to do them in real life."

"Yames?" asked Tali weakly looking up at him.

"Um yeah, Sparks?"

"Where's my Yahn?"

"He's in the Citadel Tali, he just opened the panels, we're waiting for the Crucible to warm up and fire. That should be any moment now . . ."

"Daddy?"

"What? Whoa! I'm not your daddy Tali, um . . ."

"She's not seeing and hearing things properly," replied Karen, pulling yet another small sliver, barely a millimeter long from her lower calf.

"Um like what am I supposed to do?"

"Just keep talking to her if she asks questions," said Karin, probing for yet another splinter the omni-diagnostics were telling her existed. "And stick with the truth. Don't pretend to be something you are not. She'll probably ask for her mother again in a moment, if she doesn't ask Michelle for a pain killer.

"Michelle?"

"The nurse that treated her a few days before she joined the team on the first Normandy."

"So like she really doesn't know where she is or . . ."

"She's flipping about in her memories and likewise dreaming things. She kept calling for Kiwi and Alice a few moments ago. I don't know where that came from."

"So when she asked um . . . Commander Shepherd to climb that tree?"

"Could be a memory of their few hours alone on Rannoch, or a dream," answered Karin. "Just keep applying that alcohol to her head and shoulders,"

"Doc I would think after all the spirits I've poured on her she would be completely sterilized if not totally blotto."

"James the alcohol is not to sterilize her so much as break her fever."

"How?"

"The alcohol rapidly evaporates on the skin and acts to cool her body down. It's helping the febrifuge. We have to keep her temperature from climbing too much or she'll end up brain damaged. Got it?"

"Right Doc!"

"So you think my breasts are cute?" asked Tali looking up at James.

"I'm . . . I'm not touching that one!" replied James struggling to not blush furiously.

"Quite blushing and continue to rub the face, neck, and shoulders, James," ordered Karin. "And remember to keep everything you hear during this operation confidential, understand? People will say all sorts of things in this condition."

"Right Doc!"

John Michael Shepherd did not know that the Citadel had opened up it's final panels like a five petaled daisy. He only knew he had woken back up again, and was seeing a ghostly figure of the young boy he had tried to save back on Vancouver walking up to him. Over head was a great glass dome, or so it seemed, where he could see all the fighting around him.

"Wake up!" The ghost said.

John, was too weak and exhausted to refuse any command that simple. He staggered to his feet. "What? Where am I?" he asked.

"The Citadel," said the ghost. "It's my home."

"Who are you?" asked John.

"I am the Catalyst," replied the ghost.

"I thought the Citadel was the Catalyst," replied John.

"No," said the ghost. "The Citadel is part of me."

"I need to stop the Reapers," said John. "Do you know how I can do that?" He was not sure what he was talking to. He found it vaguely suspicious that this ghost, which claimed to be the Catalyst, who lived on the Citadel, would look like a child he had failed to save in Vancouver. Who's vision had haunted a particular nightmare since that horrible day over a year ago. The nightmare which only Tali could dispel, if she was awake when he was having it. It suggested a glamour of some sort, the sort of thing which came from a deceiver. But it could be simply an alien doing something who didn't know any better. But he was now thinking, carefully, weighing the words.

"Perhaps," replied the Ghost. "I control the Reapers. They are my solution."

And the very large alarm bells and klaxons and flashing red lights in the back of John's brain went into overdrive. But he was really too overwhelmed, physically, spiritually, and mentally to show much in the way of sudden suspicion. As for the ghost, it proceeded to walk towards a curious three pronged display, the center of which had a glowing beam which seemed to travel up into deep space beyond.

"Solution? To what?" asked John.

"Chaos," replied the Ghost. And John began to suspect he was about to hear the Reaper justification all over again. But he kept his mouth shut. He needed to hear the full thing, to see if he could tweak the truth out, find some clue in this struggle.

"The created will always rebel against their creators. But we found a way to stop that from happening. A way to restore order."

"By wiping out organic life?" asked John. He suspected he knew what he was about to hear, but he wanted to confirm it.

"No, we harvest advanced civilizations," answered the Ghost. "Leaving the younger ones alone. Just like we left your people alive the last time we were here." It was in short, admitting that it was engaged in a form of genocide, one that was not based, as human genocides of the past, on age, religion, or ethnicity, but on technological advancement. It was just a different type of genocide.

"But to kill the rest," pointed out John. It was murder, and any fool could see it was murder of a most deliberate kind. Which of course was what any genocide is.

"We have them ascend, so they can make way for new life," answered the ghost. "Storing the old life in Reaper form."

"I think we'd rather keep our own form," replied John. It was a short answer to that redefinition of what was really happening.

"No, you can't," replied the ghost. Apparently it had already decided. "Without us to stop it, synthetics would destroy all organics. We've created the cycle so that never happens. That's the solution."

The irony was almost palpable. John was mentally shaking his head. The Reapers, a synthetic life form, in order to stop the destruction of organic lifeforms by synthetic life forms, were destroying organic life forms. It was the classic stupidity of evil. John doubted that this ghost was even aware of the massive contradiction it was arguing for.

"You said you were the catalyst. What are you?" asked John. He was trying to say, "What are you really?"

"A construct," said the ghost. "An intelligence designed eons ago to solve a problem. I was created to bring about balance. To be the catalyst to bring peace between synthetics and organics."

"The peace of the grave," thought John to himself.

"So you're just an AI?" he asked.

"In as much as you are just an animal," replied the ghost. "I embody the collective intelligence of all Reapers."

"Which isn't much," thought John. "If he thinks I'm going to fall for this utterly insane line of thinking."

"But you were created," he observed out loud.

"Correct," replied the ghost.

"By who?" asked John, who was suspecting he knew.

"By one's who recognized that conflict would always arise between synthetics and organics," said the Ghost. "I was first created to oversee the relations between synthetic and organic life. To establish a connection. But our efforts always ended in conflict. So a new solution was required."

"The Reapers?" asked John.

"Precisely," answered the ghost.

"Where did the Reapers come from? Did you create them?"

"My creators gave them form," answered the ghost. He was referring to the Leviathans, a clue to the ancient origins of the Reapers that the Normandy Team had traced down during the smuggling summer. It had ended with John finally meeting the Leviathans and linking all four cycles of Reaper slaughter into a single coherent history. "I gave them function," continued the ghost. "They in turn, give me purpose. The Reapers are a synthetic recreation of my creators."

"And what happened to your creators?" asked John. He knew the answer, but he was seeing what the ghost would say.

"They became the first true Reaper. They did not approve. But it was the only solution."

"You've said that before," replied John. He was now testing the argument. "But how do the Reapers solve anything?"

"Organics create synthetics to improve their own existence. But those improvements have limits. To exceed those limits, synthetics must be allowed to evolve. They must by definition surpass their creators. The result is conflict, destruction, chaos. It is inevitable. Reapers harvest all life, organic and synthetic, preserving them before they are forever lost to this conflict."

"We're at war with the Reapers right now!" stammered John. He was utterly amazed at the incredible blindness of the ghost. How it simply could not see the contradictions to it's own arguments playing right out in front of it? How it could look at the conflict, destruction, and chaos that it was visiting upon all life, and believe that it was stopping conflict, destruction, and chaos?

"You may be in conflict with the Reapers," said the ghost. "But they are not interested in war."

"I find that hard to believe," observed John.

"When fire burns, is it at war, is it in conflict?" asked the ghost. "Or is it doing what it was simply created to do? We are no different."

"Fire has no free will," thought John. "It only does what it does because that is its nature. It does not move beyond it's nature because it can not choose to do so. The Reapers don't have that excuse. They have chosen this route."

"We harvest your bodies, your knowledge, your creations. We preserve it to be reborn in the form of a new Reaper."

"In other words, Washington Crossing The Delaware, Michelangelo's David, and Notre Dame are all combined and look like a Reaper, which looks like a thousand other Reapers, and he calls that preservation," thought John.

"Like a cleansing fire, we restore balance," continued the ghost. "New life, both organic and synthetic can once again flourish."

John knew he wasn't going to get anywhere that way.

"What do you know about the Crucible?" he asked.

"The device you refer to as the Crucible is little more than a power source," answered the Ghost. However, in combination with the Citadel and the Relays, it is capable of releasing tremendous amounts of energy throughout the galaxy. It's crude, but effective and adaptive in it's design."

"Who designed it?" asked John.

"You would not know them, and there is not enough time to explain," replied the ghost. "We first noted the concept of this three cycles ago. In each cycle, the design has evolved."

"Why didn't you stop it?" John needed to know it's reasons for that. That would give him a clue as to what he would need to do.

"We believed the concept had been eradicated," replied the Ghost. "Clearly organics are more resourceful than we realized."

"That is one of the characteristics of life in general," replied John. "We think things out and try to solve problems. And the chief mark of thinking is thinking ahead to the future. And knowing our opponents. Like you."

"I am not your opponent. The fact that you are standing here, the first organic to have come this far, proves it.

"What about Tim's little greeting?" thought John.

"But it also proves my solution won't work any more," continued the Ghost.

Now John was smelling a trap. The ghost was giving him the idea that there might be a way out but that way out was under his own terms. Those terms were the very thing that John needed to avoid at all costs. But it was going to be the only way John could get any information about how to make the Crucible operate. Like a cop trying to solve a murder case, where the only witness to the crime was the murderer himself, John would have to sift each answer to find out where the truth was hidden, and then take what bits of truth he could find, and follow them to their logical end. And all the while he was doing this, the races were dying just outside trying to defend the Crucible against the slowly escalating pressure that the Reapers were putting on the entire fleet and his own body was struggling to stay alive after the horrific beating it had undertaken just trying to get to this point.

Just when he thought it couldn't have gotten worse, it had.


	39. Chapter 39 - None of the Above

"So now what?" asked John.

"We find a new solution," replied the Ghost.

"Why are you telling me this?" John asked. "Why help me?"

"You have altered the variables," replied the Ghost.

"What do you mean?" continued John.

"The crucible changed me, created new possibilities," answered the Ghost. "But I can't make them happen. If there is to be a new solution, you must act. It is now in your power to destroy us. But be warned. Others will be destroyed as well. The Crucible will not discriminate. All synthetics will be targeted. Even you are partly synthetic."

"What exactly will happen?" asked John.

"Your Crucible device appears to be largely intact, however, the effects of the blast will not be constrained to the Reapers. Technology you rely on will be affected, but those who survive shall have little difficulty repairing the damage. There will still be losses, but no more than what has already been lost.

"I made it this far," mused John. "We'll destroy you without setting it off."

"Impossible," replied the ghost. "You are vastly outnumbered. You have sacrificed many of your resources just to reach this point. If you do not use the Crucible, the Reapers will not be stopped, and the cycle will continue."

"I don't believe you!" retorted John.

"Your believe is not required," answered the Ghost.

"There has to be another way," said John.

"There is," replied the Ghost. "You can instead use the energy of the Crucible to seize control of the Reapers."

"So are you suggesting the Illusive Man was right after all?" asked John.

"Yes," replied the ghost. "But he could have never taken control because we already controlled him."

"But I can?" asked John. He did not know if the ghost could hear the skepticism in his voice, but he did not have the strength to disguise it.

"You will die," replied the ghost. "You will control us. But you will lose everything you have."

"How can I control the Reapers when I'm dead?" asked John. He found the claim so utterly outrageous he had to hear the answer.

"Your corporeal form will be dissolved. But your thoughts and even your memories will continue. You will no longer be organic. Your connection to your kind will be lost, though you will remain aware of their existence."

"But the Reapers will obey me?"

"Yes," answered the Ghost. "We will be yours to control and direct as you see fit."

John just stood there, seeming to think.

"There is another solution," suggested the ghost.

"Just how many solutions is this thing going to throw at me?" thought John.

"Synthesis," said the ghost.

"And that is?" asked John.

"Add your energy to the Crucible's," said the ghost. "The chain reaction will combine all synthetic and organic life into a new framework, a new DNA."

"Explain how my energy can be added to the Crucible," asked John.

"Your organic energy, the essence of who and what you are, will be broken down and then dispersed."

"To do what? Exactly?"

"The energy in the crucible, released in this way will alter the matrix of all organic life in the galaxy. Organics seek perfection through technology, synthetics seek perfection though understanding. Organics will be perfected by integrating fully with synthetic technology. Synthetics in turn will finally have full understanding of organics. It is the ideal solution. Now that we know it is possible it is inevitable that we will reach synthesis."

"Why couldn't you do it sooner?" asked John. Again, the answer would prove enlightening.

"We have tried . . . a similar solution in the past," answered the ghost. "But it has always failed."

"Why?" asked John.

"Because the organics were not ready. It is not something that can be . . . forced. You are ready. And you may choose it."

"Choose to force something on everyone else? Which you could not do somehow? What's the difference between you forcing synthesis on everything and me forcing it on everything?" he thought. But that is not what he said.

"You're asking me to change everything," observed John. "Everyone. I can't make that decision! I won't."

"Why not? Synthetics are already part of you. Can you imagine your life without them?"

"That's besides the point."

"You're time is at an end," replied the ghost. "You must decide."

"Give me a moment to think," said John, looking at his pistol. And then he looked at the ghost.

"I have to do some things first, some rituals which need be done in order to make the right decision," he said facing the ghost and raising his pistol. "First? I have to tell Coyote to find another white man to fool." There was the loud report of the pistol. "Then? I have to tell Anansi to spin his webs in another jungle." Again the pistol cracked. "Third? I have to tell Satan to get behind me." He fired yet again at the ghost. "And finally? I have to tell Loki to GO BACK TO HIS MOTHER HEL!" And to the loud popping exclamations of a modern pistol being fired repeatedly, John continued to fire into the ghost until the heat sink shut down the trigger mechanism.

"SO BE IT!" Boomed Harbinger as that image of the child fuzzed away.

"There has to be another way," thought John. "I wouldn't be this far without there being another way."

"Commander Shepherd?" came Hackett's voice, sounding a bit stressed. "The Reapers are seriously putting pressure on us now, in fact, there seems to be a renewed effort to get to the Crucible. You need to get that thing fired now."

"There were two separate Reaper attacks we had to fend off here," replied Shepherd. "Anderson gave his life defending the crucible in the first attack. I've just defeated the second. I now plan to fire the Crucible, but there's another puzzle that needs to be solved. PRAY!"

"Oh God," groaned Hackett. "Why can't this end?"

"Shepherd," groaned Tim. "The choice on the left, the control option. I can't take it, but you can. How can you refuse this last opportunity to control the Reapers?"

"Because I know where I'm really going after death," replied John. "And for that reason I know it is a lie."

"You are too smart to believe such a superstition," suggested Tim. He weakly shifted his body and winced in pain.

"You forget," answered John. "I was dead for a very long period of time. And during that time, I learned an awful lot about what happens to people after they die, because I was directly experiencing it." He began to search for some clue to finding a means of triggering the Crucible.

"You are making a catastrophic mistake," suggested Tim quietly. Even now, he was still trying to push his own agenda. But there had been a subtle shift. He was now trying to get John to control. The pain had fixed a bit of stupid in him already.

"Tony Tony look around, something lost that must be found," muttered John. It was an old Catholic rhyme which was an appeal to St. Anthony, who was the patron saint of lost items, among other things. He repeated it over and over as he scanned, but just as he had finished repeating that rhyme for the ninth time, something happened.

"Well, what have we got here Liara? A Commander half burned to a crisp? Shepherd? Just what are you hoping to accomplish pacing like that?"

John turned to face Garrus and Liara, who were standing just five meters behind him.

"I am so glad to see the two of you," he groaned. "But how did you get here?"

"Well unlike some people who charged straight towards the beam like a Krogan covered in flaming rhyncol, I actually did my job like I had been trained to and moved carefully from one piece of cover to another, sniped out the cannibal which was trying to guard the beam, and in a style appropriate, stepped into the beam after Liara."

"And he was the gentleman about it too," added Liara. "He said, 'After you, dear.'"

John smiled in spite of the pain.

"So why isn't the Crucible working?" asked Garrus. "It seems an appropriate question given that the entire galaxy is dying outside this nice picture window. Not exactly the sort of view I'd pay money to have installed in my house."

There's something we're missing," said John, his frustration building. "Something which is keeping the Crucible from firing. I suspect some form of sabotage by the Reapers, for I just had to avoid one hell of a psychological trap. That's what that three path way monstrosity is about." He was pointing to the three way construct which had been the thing the ghost had been referring to as the three choices.

"No," groaned Tim. "It is the final opportunity."

"Tim? What are you doing here?" asked Garrus.

"Tim?" muttered The Illusive Man. "Why are you calling me that? That's not my name."

"No it isn't," replied Garrus. "But back on the Cerberus Normandy it was easier to say than The Illusive Man and The Illusive Man is no longer your name. For starters you have ceased being rather illusive."

Tim fell back weakly.

"I suppose you will side with Shepherd," he groaned.

"I can't see otherwise," replied Garrus. "He is the man I would follow through fire and water, and furthermore, he is a most trusted friend."

"Liara?" gasped John, struggling to deal with another spasm of pain. "Can you see anything which would enable the Crucible to fire?"

"I'm looking Shepherd," she said totally focused upon her omni-tool.

"Hello, what's this?" mused Garrus looking over into the distance.

"Garrus?" asked both John and Liara simultaneously.

"I might have known it would require a C-sec operative to spot the problem," continued Garrus.

"Garrus!" cried both Liara and John almost simultaneously.

"Don't you _dare_ say something needs calibration," added Liara, almost at a shout.

"John, Liara, look over there," suggested Garrus.

Both followed his extended arm and pointed finger at the end of it.

"Tell me, Miss Shadow Broker and Commander, what do you two see?"

"A Keeper," replied John.

"Standing next to an off Omni-terminal," added Liara.

"And what is wrong with that picture?" continued Garrus.

Both John and Liara looked at each other, then looked at Garrus. John shrugged while Liara sort of shuffled her feet.

"Which is why I said it would take a C-sec operative to notice that," continued Garrus. "The only time an Omni-terminal is off in the Citadel is when there is no Keeper next to it."

"What? You mean turn it on and the Crucible fires?" asked John, almost incredulous.

"Why not?" asked Garrus.

"It can't be that simple," groaned John.

"Says who?" asked Garrus.

"Alright, Garrus, I'm not strong enough to get over there right now, so I'll need your help."

Garrus sighed. "Commander? Do you remember that conversation in the kitchen at the New Year's party shortly after Traynor was talking about how amazed she was that she was standing among such legends and before Tali made her very loud announcement about what she was going to do with you after midnight?"

"You would have to bring that up at this juncture," suggested Shepherd, not at all smiling.

"You don't remember do you?" continued Garrus. "About how you hogged all the button pushing? Well not this time, Commander. Not when we have a pair of very fit, young, not to mention both limber and shapely Asari legs to propel a sweet yet scary, mild yet intimidating, Liara over there. So dear, would you be a good little Shadow Broker and please save the galaxy for us?"

"Well, only because you said please," replied Liara who did that cute and feminine yet very Asari half hop half skip jog over to the terminal where she paused to look at it for a moment with her index finger on her chin before directing it towards the terminal.

Standing in Saren's office in Virmire, the team had encountered Sovereign, and discovered he was a Reaper. And true to the Reaper personality, he had boasted that the Reapers had built the Citadel and Mass Relays and thus caused organics to develop along technological lines which the Reapers choose for them. This was in order to make the organics easier to harvest. But what Sovereign did not seem to have known, or if he had, had discounted it as impossible, was the double edge to that sword, as there always is, for there was hardly a single organic connected in some way with the workings of the Citadel who did not know what an 'on' button looked like. And so the final irony of the Reaper war was the fact that the Reapers had deliberately taught Liara, along with tens of millions of other organics, just what had to be done to end the Reapers forever.

The Citadel lit up . . . And so did the Crucible.

"He did it!" cried Hackett over the public comm, seeing the beginnings of the warm up from his flag ship. He was nearly all that was left between the Reapers and the Crucible. "All units! Proceed to the rendezvous point, the Crucible is firing!"

"Hackett? Don't you see?" came in Admiral Gerrel's voice. "The Reapers! They are falling back! We need to pursue and turn that retreat into a rout!"

"That is not necessary," said Hackett.

"Analysis suggests pursuit would increase casualties, break down Reaper morale, and give the sailors on the fleets positive feedback. Besides, Geth have lost too many platforms in the last 36 hours. Vengeance is desired," added Admiral Nelson.

"This is Primarch Victus, all Turian naval forces, pursue! Let the Reapers feel our sting on their tail for once!"

"Very well," concluded Hackett, "All fleets pursue and destroy every single Reaper you can!"

The Crucible took a full ten minutes to warm up before it fired. The Reapers were within two minutes of putting their first beam into the Crucible when Liara had engaged it. No doubt the Reapers could have, had they kept their cool, taken out the Crucible anyway and the secret would have died with Liara, Garrus, John, and Tim. But they had, faced with the prospect of immediate death, no doubt for the first time in their entire lifespan, panicked and fled.

During that time, Liara and Garrus began the process of getting John out of the Crucible, half carrying, half walking him towards the beam exit point. Anderson was to be left behind, as was Tim, for Liara and Garrus had their hands full with John. But as luck would have it, the Krogan had charged again once the four Reapers had leapt into the sky and started to flee. Wrex and over two dozen Krogan popped up, and knowing what the situation was, they were able to get the corpse of Anderson and Tim out as well.

Throughout the Galaxy, the Reapers were flying out of the atmosphere of each planet they were harvesting, they were making for not the Mass Relays, but deep space itself, trying to put as much distance between them and the pathways of the galaxy as possible. And in Sol, the thousands of Reapers were being pursued by the tens of thousands of allied ships and the Geth were still coordinating fire. Over the next nine minutes and forty five seconds, a total of one hundred and six Reapers were destroyed and not a single allied ship got so much as a single bolt fired in it's direction, so determined where the Reapers to flee.

Singing Krogan songs of praise for a mighty fallen warrior, the Krogan carried Anderson's body away from the beam and towards the head quarters were the final attack had begun, nearly fourteen hours prior. Two Krogan were carrying Tim, who seemed to be in a state of shock. Garrus and Liara were helping John along and across the ring, the cheers of the survivors of Hammer were rising. They knew that their sacrifices had not been vain. For everyone knew that the battle, and the war, had been won.

And then the Crucible fired. It was a massive ball of expanding energy in the form of a silver light, a golden light . . . a holy light.

It struck the Normandy first, where Joker was busy trying to get the ship back to London so they might pick up Commander Shepherd. There was a sudden brightness and they were through. Then the light reached the pursuing allied fleets, and bathed them in it's golden radiance for a moment, and then it had passed through them . . . and struck the Reapers.

A space battle is silent. For there is no medium for the sound to pass through. You hear your own weapons firing, but the explosion in the distance is a silent flash of bright light. Only when the shock wave hits the ship can you hear anything of it's effects.

And yet, when the light struck the fleeing Reapers, there remained not a single member of the allied fleets who did not swear, to his or her dying day, that they heard their death cries.

Karin was finding yet another piece of shrapnel in Tali when she heard it, a grinding electronic scream of anger, frustration, and of primal fear.

"Karin?" asked Tali quietly. "What was that horrible noise? And why do I feel happy that I heard it?"

"It means that your Yahn has saved the galaxy," sighed Karen. For she had been appraised by Joker that the fleets were in pursuit of the fleeing Reapers.

"He's coming back to me?" she asked.

"Yeah Sparks," said James, who was still rubbing alcohol swabs on her head, neck, and shoulders.

"Fever at 102°," observed Karin on her Omni-tool.

"That's better right? It's not at 105° any more?" asked James.

"Yes," sighed Karin. She continued to look with her Omni-tool. "I think we got the last of them."

"Doc you said that four pieces ago, and three pieces ago, and two pieces ago, and before this last one too," suggested James.

"Which is why I'm double and triple checking," replied Karin, who was feeling horribly exhausted from the past hour of emergency medical treatment. "Yes . . . I can now say with assurance that we got the last piece. Help me put her into her bed, and get the sheets back on her."

"Right doc," replied James. "Shall I bring in Javik? I think he's been waiting outside for news."

"Too many variables for her to react to," said Karin. "But I'm glad he helped where he could. Tell him the worst has past and we'll leave her to recover." She leaned over and began to dab the tears off of Tali's cheeks for Tali had began to silently weep.

"Tell Yahn, I want him here when he get's back," whispered Tali.

"Your Yahn is just as badly hurt as you are," replied Karin. "But we'll get you two together as soon as we can."

Tali started to sit up, swaying in dizziness and delirium. "He needs me!" she whispered.

Karin gently pushed her back down. "He'll be here as soon as he can," she said. "You must rest. Or you won't live long enough to help him."

In the mean time, the energy from the Crucible fired once again, a single shaft of brilliant energy spent a couple of seconds charging up the Mass Relay and then it fired straight for the the next Mass Relay and over the next few minutes, the chain reaction spread across the galaxy, destroying tens of thousands of Reapers fleeing while reducing every single Reaper soldier on every single occupied planet into a fine blue ash. But as the bursts extended several light years out of the solar systems from the Relays, thousands of Reapers were destroyed outside those systems in deep space. Those derelict and killed Reaper ships would remain on the edge of sentient consciousness, horror stories of dead ships in deep space that would haunt and drive those who found them to madness.

As for those who were killed within the systems? They were collected, broken down, and collectively buried as what they called the tombs of fallen victims, for the knowledge of the recipe that made a Reaper was well known shortly. These ships were not ships, but the bodies of countless victims and by burying them, the sentient species hoped to honor those fallen, as well as keep later generations from becoming indoctrinated by the nanobots of the Reapers and become convinced that the creatures needed to be rebuilt. As it was, the nanobots in the tombs remained active, and in a few generations, the stories of ancient haunted tombs were more than sufficient to keep all but the most foolhardy from digging into those deep graves.

But the soldiers of the Reapers were not the only things who turned into ash, for every single indoctrinated sentient, starting with Tim, was likewise reduced to ash as well. When the light hit John, the Krogan, Liara, Garrus, and Tim, they heard Tim utter a howl of pain and when the light faded, there was nothing but a pile of clothes being held by a pair of baffled Krogan.

J0hn, seeing the disintegration of Tim sighed. "There was so much he could have told us," he said.

"I guess he's kind of illusive again," observed Garrus.

The three of them looked up as the Normandy descended. While the sky remained dark and dismal, John was noticing that the overcast was a lighter grey, more natural.

"Now what do we do?" asked Liara.

"We become famous," replied Garrus, who was grinning. "Really famous and rich from the hero vids we consult for."

John groaned. "You know they're going to credit Blasto in Blasto 9 with firing the Crucible."

"To paraphrase Tali," answered Garrus. "I have a Widow."

The docking bay of the Normandy opened up and James and Javik came down. James was giving every one bear hugs. And then EDI slowly came up, an expression of sadness upon her face, approaching the Normandy, holding the burnt and scarred body of Kaiden.

"I'm sorry commander, he died in the last charge," she said in a rather matter of fact manner. She was still learning all the subtle nuances of emotion. But no one there doubted she was, as far as she was able to, grieving.

John simply steeled himself.

"He was a good man," observed Garrus. "And I'm really going to miss his songs."

"That poor poor man, to have so much loss since the beginning," said Liara gently placing her hand upon Kaiden's brow. "And then lose himself as well."

"Like tens of billions of families all over the galaxy," observed John. He suppressed his grief for the moment. Looking up, he saw Dr. Chakwas coming down the ramp.

"Get up to the medical bay now Commander," she said. "I had a hard enough time saving Tali . . ."

"She's alive?" asked John, his heart leaping in his chest throwing itself against his rib cage.

"Barely," replied Karin, "But the worst is over now. And you need serious treatment yourself."

"I need to see her first!"

"No you don't, follow me Commander, as the doctor on this ship, you are now under my command!"

And so Commander Shepherd was placed in the Medical Bay until he received sufficient skin grafts to take care of the massive third degree burns which were over a large chunk of his body. This was the work of nearly a day. Once those were in place, and once Tali's suit was once again safely on her, John was wheeled into his own cabin where he found his Tali, seated up, in their bed, looking at him through her visor. He didn't have to be told she started to cry, for he could hear the whifting of her visor.

A week later, on the 21st of October, a cool day with a typical English rain shower in the middle of it, the entire team gathered for a special dinner to reflect and remember, but in some cases, say goodbye to each other. From the first Normandy, there was Wrex, Tali, Garrus, and Liara. From the second Normandy, were added Jack, Grunt, Miranda, EDI, and Jacob. Finally, there was James, Javik, Samantha and Cortez. Pictures of Ashley, Kaiden, Kasumi, Kelly, Legion, Mordin, Samara, and Zaeed were posted. Zaeed sent his regrets, the mercenaries were having to be rebuilt after horrendous losses through their efforts in the battle of London and so he had already departed for Omega. Samara likewise sent regrets, but she was involved in something she would not talk about. Kelly had vanished as well, she had been a refugee on the Citadel, and it was uncertain when she had been killed. No one knew Kasumi's fate. She had last been seen on the Citadel just before the Reapers had taken it.

"She's alive," insisted Liara. "It was such a perfect time for her to be killed she no doubt took full advantage of it."

"She always wanted to be not the most famous thief in the galaxy," sighed Tali. "My little Yusekoo, where are you?"

They had gathered in a tent in a northern suburb of London, where the destruction was not so catastrophic. The tent was in a park where a small brook flowed towards London. The tent was large, and it was filled with space heaters so they were not uncomfortable. John and Tali however, were still a little sore.

"Now I'm curious," said Garrus, after a few rounds of beer and wine had been distributed and everyone was happily munching on the finger foods. "You told us that the big three pronged thing which Tim insisted contained the means to control the Reapers was a trap. How did you know that?"

John seemed to think for a moment. "It was a compilation of all sorts of things," he said. "It started with Sovereign's speech to us back on Virmire. That arrogant expression of power and suggestion of great enlightenment of which we simply could not comprehend."

"You were convinced we'd beat them when they attacked," observed Garrus.

"Yeah, sounded a lot easier back then didn't it?"

"As easy as pushing a button," suggested Liara grinning.

Everyone collectively groaned.

"But there was that fundamental deceit which was being promulgated by the Reapers," continued John. "It made me suspect everything that I heard from a Reaper source after that. And then of course we had Harbinger's arrogance which blinded him to the Wizard Hack, which told me that on a certain level, that the Reapers were not that interested in our society sufficiently to be educated by it. Thus they never grasped that they were telling us humans stuff we had heard time and time again from our own people."

"But we all know this already Commander," observed Miranda. "What Garrus, and myself included, want to know is how you knew that this three choice decision was yet another Reaper trap?"

"For starters there was the Alpha Relay, and the trick that caused me to think I needed to destroy the Relay to buy the Galaxy more time, at the cost of several hundred thousand Batarians. All it got me was arrested and nothing was done to prepare. The overall futility of that gesture made me suspect that the Reapers had a very twisted sense of treachery, but with Javik's recollections of his own time period, I became convinced that the Reapers had a certain level of cunning which enabled them to effectively discredit their chief enemies."

John continued to muse and think for a moment.

"You're not explaining it at all," observed Miranda.

"I'm trying to put it all together," insisted John. "It was a slow discovery over four years." He paused and took a sip of his beer. "The next thing was my argument with the dying Reaper on Rannoch. That's where I really heard the Reaper justification for the first time, that insistence that synthetics and organics were doomed to fight one another. It was the first real sign that I was dealing with a heresy."

"Heresy?" asked Miranda. "Isn't that just a name for a chain of thought you don't happen to like because it flies in the face of the establishment belief?"

"Nope," replied John. "A heresy is a statement which uses a particular true point to obscure or deny other true points. The heresy was that synthetics and organics were doomed to fight."

"But there have been synthetic and organic fights," observed Tali. "Like the Quarians and Geth!"

"This is true," replied John. "But it was a heresy because it was also denying that the Geth and Quarians could reconcile, as they have, and likewise the very real fact that synthetics fought other synthetics and organics also fought other organics. And of course, it completely overlooked the fact that when the Reapers attacked, it was synthetics destroying not just organics, but also synthetics. In short, the Reaper solution was merely more of the same. No wonder the ghost was told no by the Leviathans when it proposed the solution to them, because it was absurd. And the arrogance of the ghost was already there. For when it's solution was rejected, it simply started the first harvest on the Leviathans themselves."

"So the solution to the struggle between synthetics and organics was to be resolved by synthetics destroying organics who had advanced sufficiently to make new synthetics," mused Liara. "Makes perfect sense to me," she added as she rolled her eyes.

"The heresies chief problem was that it was a form of bigotry. Free willed beings, sentients, are going to fight. I mean, look at me and Tali? We love each other dearly and yet, once in a while, we have a fight and someone get's punched in the arm."

"No . . . Not our sweet little Tali," suggested Garrus. "Our happy bubbles Tali was what Kelly called her? No, you two are so happy you never have fights."

"Well there are misunderstandings on occasion," admitted Tali. No one could see her grin but her eyes behind the visor had a curious twinkle in them.

"But to say that the fault of the conflict is due to the fact that one side is synthetic and the other side is organic? You might as well claim that the reason why Tali and I fight is because I am Human and she is Quarian. Disagreements over dish washing procedures in the Shepherd household have nothing to do with it at all. It's a completely superficial excuse which is what all bigotry is at the bottom."

"Yeah," observed Jacob, who was seated next to his wife. "We humans know a thing or two about bigotry."

"Every single genocide which has played itself out in human history has been a foundational expression of bigotry, be it the genocides against the Afrikaners, Armenians, Jews, or Hutus, or the genocides against the rich, religious, or the ideological. To blame bad things on some group that is only defined by the most superficial of designations is the mark of the bigoted brute." ended Shepherd. "So when I heard this from the ghost, I knew I could not trust it."

"So when the ghost started telling you about the three choices?" asked Garrus.

"I knew that there was probably a trap in all three, and believe me, there were some really nasty traps in that device."

"How did it get into the design of the Crucible?" asked Liara.

"Indoctrination? I'd bet when the Inusannon started the project, and the Protheans tried to refine it? They had indoctrinated engineers who were there to put that in as a fail safe. Like I said before, the Reapers had a very clever and treacherous type of cunning which they could use. It explains why the Reapers did not really try to destroy the Crucible when it was brought up to the Citadel. First, there was the fact that the panels where closed making docking impossible, then there was the guard around the transfer beam, then we had Tim waiting for us at the panels, and finally, those three choices by Harbinger himself, cleverly disguised as a child one of his minions had killed on the first day of the war. Seriously now, what were the odds that we'd beat all four obstacles?"

"It is reasonable to presume indoctrinated agents," mused Javik. "My teams only knew it was a project, we never knew where it was located or who was working on it. But indoctrinated servants of the Reapers were a constant threat when I was fighting them. There would have been no way to protect against it because we did not have that serum the Salarian designed. Or at least my group was not aware of any such medical treatment."

"So at no point when you were given those three choices you thought that perhaps Harbinger was in fact just an alien thinking alien thoughts?" continued Miranda.

"Well first of all," chuckled John. "Alien thoughts are merely thoughts by a non-human. The entire universe is governed by modes of organization which are reflected throughout the universe in what we call logic. Aliens are either going to think logically or illogically because logic is the means by which all thought is governed. It is the basis for mathematics, which itself is the basis for science, which itself is the governing force behind all technology. Any alien technology is the result of an alien thinking logically at some level just as human technology reflects human thinking on a logical level."

"Which explains why Mordin was able to come up with a serum which protected against indoctrination," added EDI. "Reaper technology, governed ultimately by logic, would eventually be comprehensible."

"And why Tim was able to get as much out of it that he could," added Miranda reflecting. "And of course why it also was able to indoctrinate him even though he knew on some level that it was a threat."

"So having been presented with an absurd solution to a problem which is far more comprehensible when you consider that you have two groups of free willed beings coming to blows as opposed to the fact that one group was created by God and the other was created by Organics, you naturally suspect any 'new' alternatives. The first solution is clearly absurd and when that absurdity is made manifest, the three solutions has better be a recognition of the real problem and not the false one."

"And as all three choices presumed the preordained Organic / Synthetic conflict, you knew you couldn't trust them," mused Miranda.

"Precisely!" replied John, getting animated. "The first choice he gave me was the most brutal of the lot. Shoot this target and I kill all synthetics, and we have peace. I kill the Geth, who's entire existence has been defined by a struggle to survive against their terrified creator's determination to shut them down. And as an added bonus, I get to kill EDI as well. Way to reward the best damn pilot in the galaxy who's just as responsible for this little after action party as any one else in this group."

"It might has worked," suggested Garrus. "I mean it would have killed all the Reapers."

"Somehow," observed John. "I don't think so. Remember, the destruction of the alpha relay was supposed to buy us another few months time before the next harvest began. What was the point? They did nothing except arrest me for genocide, which on some level I was guilty off. But likewise, made me horribly suspicious about any type of similar decision I made afterwards which is the first and biggest reason why I knew I could not pick that one."

"It's what saved the Geth," added Tali. "I remember. I saw that look on your face standing next to Leyion with you on Rannoch. It was so like the look you had when you came back from the Alpha Relay."

"But you said there were two other choices," said Jacob.

"Number three was particularly absurd," replied John. "It was synthesis. We were all going to be transformed in such a manner that we would be 'just alike'."

"That sounds really effen creepy," suggested Jack.

"It's merely a sanitized version of what the Reapers were already doing," observed John. "They were making us all alike, namely, turning us all into big bug Reapers. The only difference would be that we would all keep our forms, but we would all think alike, act alike, and be alike in that we would be a fusion of synthetic and organic."

"And because we are all alike, our fighting just goes away . . ." sighed Jacob. "Yeah, that must be why my brother and me never were always punching each other's lights out when we were kids."

"It's not a solution at all," replied John, "Because it presumes that the reason why we are fighting is because one of us is synthetic and the other is organic. Like reason one, it presumes the original heresy, namely that organics and synthetics must fight because of what they are."

"But you jumped over reason two," noted Garrus.

"Yeah, because that one was the 'indoctrination' trap," answered John. "It did not presume the conflict so much as offered me the chance to be the God who would stop it because I could control the Reapers."

"Wait! Isn't that what Cerberus was trying to do?" cried Miranda.

"And what the group who was sabotaging the Crucible in my cycle were trying to do," added Javik.

"And both groups were? . . ." said John raising up his hands as if he were suggesting a group response.

"Indoctrinated!" cried the entire crew.

"So," continued John. "It didn't work for the Leviathan, it didn't work for the Inusannon, it didn't work for the Protheans, and the ghost told me it would not work for Tim because he too was indoctrinated but me? Me? Yeah, it would work for me because I wasn't indoctrinated, which of course was what Tim was claiming right up until the end. So no, I have nothing to worry about even though what I'm being offered is what they all were trying to achieve which was how they got indoctrinated. Yeah. Fool me once? Shame on you. Fool me twice? Who's the idiot now? But it gets even better. When I pick the God of the Gods option, my body is dissolved and all that it left is my memories. In short, I'm dead. And I know where I'm going when I'm dead so I won't be the God of the God after all, but if I was really going to transform into the one who could control the Reapers, it would also have worked for Tim because in order for a Reaper to control someone who is dead, _they have to have his body!_ Remember Saren?"

"Which was why you didn't kill Tim or let him commit suicide," exclaimed Garrus. "He would have become the new uber-Tim under direct Reaper control!"

"And Saren's corpse, animated by Sovereign, nearly killed us all," groaned Liara.

John simply nodded. "I bet that was what Harbinger had planned once Tim had committed suicide. And with Anderson mortally wounded and me totally wasted from playing leapfrog with his beam weapons, end of story."

"The ghost lied to you," concluded EDI.

"Yeah," said John. "Once all three solutions were presented, I knew I was being given a song and dance and so I called him a collection of trickster diety names which have come down to us in song and story on Earth, filled him full of bullets, and then prayed I'd come up with a solution before the Reapers, now knowing I had seen through their last trap, realized they would have to destroy the Crucible and came gunning for Shield.

"Yeah," noted Joker. "They were not paying much attention to Shield while the fleet was fighting them. Nor where they focusing on Hammer. They were going for the Combined Fleets. That changed real fast near the end."

"So that's how my Yahn saved the Galaxy," chirped Tali.

John shook his head. "No," he said softly. "I didn't. I never would have figured it out, I was totally at a loss when Garrus and Liara found me. It was Garrus who noticed that the Citadel was actually shut down when it didn't need to be, and it was Liara who turned it back on. It was the three of us, in tandem, which made it happen. And it was the team as a whole who got us there. It wasn't me, I played my part, but so did everyone else."

There was silence for a moment.

"Well that's all nice and touchy feeling Commander," said Joker. "But now there's going to be a hell of a legal fight over who gets what share of the royalties when this is made into a great adventure vid series."

"Maybe it would be best if we publicly lie about your achievements and make you the sole savior, Commander," suggested Garrus. "I know you'll be fair when you share the royalties and if not, we all know where you are going to live, and it's not nice to to fool the Shadow Broker."

"Indeed," said Liara trying to sound intimidating. "Have you ever faced a team of Asari Commandos? Few have."

"Yes," replied John.

"Oh that's right you have!" laughed Liara. "Forget it, I've got nothing on you any more."

"Maybe you, but I'd bet he's never looked down the barrel of a Turian Dreadnought's cannon, with my finger on the trigger," quietly mused Garrus with a Turian smile, which showed all those pointed teeth.

"Me and Joker and the Normandy will take your Dreadnought any day," replied John in what looked like the beginnings of another Moxie fight.

"Game on compadres!" shouted James.

"Like I'm going to let you put me in that fight with the Normandy and EDI!" replied Joker. "That's going to require a lot of dancing by the Normandy and I've seen Garrus shoot and I've also seen _you dance!_"

Garrus, still grinning, leaned back and flexed his fingers.

"It's okay Yahn," giggled Tali. "I still love you and big brother has to win sometimes or he wouldn't be big brother."

"That's what I love about you Tali," sighed John. "You are always there to note when I'm The Big Loser!"

"But you're my big loser," she offered.

"So what now," asked Jacob, looking at John and Tali. They were both on a pair of chairs next to each other, and Tali was holding his right hand with both of hers, all fingers locked together and she was leaning on him looking extremely happy and content, in so far as her body posture suggested.

"The next phase of Operation John and Tali is to get this girl married in proper Catholic fashion," answered John.

"But you're already married according to Quarian law," observed Miranda.

"But according to human law they're just hooked up," answered Joker. "They're the saviors of the galaxy but they're setting a bad example which has the priests all upset and writing homilies about."

EDI tilted her head for a second, and then observed, "Jeff, in my analysis of Catholic Homilies over the past month, those which are published, I find 97% are topics on the preparations for final judgement, 2.9% on promises of God's vengeance, and . . . Oh! it's a joke."

"I don't need to have Priests writing homilies about me, I've got my mother," replied John with a rueful grin. "And she's more than capable of exceeding all the Priests in the Galaxy. At least when it comes to guilt trips."

"Your mom too?" asked James. "Must be a mother thing then."

"It is," groaned Garrus nodding. "Trust me it is quite universal."

Liara and Tali looked at each other. Liara winked. What Tali did remained illusive for she was behind her visor. Miranda on the other hand seemed a little wistful.


	40. Chapter 40 - This Was For Yahn

And so, three months later, after several interviews with various Catholic Canon Lawyers and a Priest or two, John and Tali found themselves in a midlands village Catholic Church, preparing for the Sacrament of Matrimony.

It was a typical English winter's day, in that there was a bit of snow on the ground. But likewise it was a church which had not been built for as public a marriage as this had turned out to be. It was rather small. But it was one of the few churches which had been both found and with minimal damage since it had been located in a smaller village and as a consequence been nearly ignored by the Reapers. Even so, most of the villagers had been taken or killed in the struggle.

England was very short of Priests. In fact she had been short of priests for several hundred years thanks to the machinations of several English governments. But one was flown in from Uganda to handle the ceremony as well as replace the former Priest who had died ministering to those in the camps around York to the north. Indeed, for the next two generations of Church history, most of the Priests would be African or Indian, though the Chinese would start to fill in near the end.

One would have thought that humanity would have been grateful enough for Shepherd's work at saving their lives, that they would have allowed him the luxury of having a nicely publicized wedding with sanitary pictures and good luck wishes. But the world's media has always had a mean streak in it, and the Quarians were 'fair targets'. Jacob had been right about humans knowing a thing or two about bigotry and Tali was the focus of a large portion of it. Once again, the supposed deviance's and criminal tendencies of the Quarians were aired about along with more than a few highly inaccurate artistic renderings of what Quarians looked like. John got increasingly angry as the wedding approached and these stories continued to be pumped into the videos of the ordinary humans. Liara however, became the handler for the affair and she instructed John to sit tight and say nothing. She would 'take care' of the matter. John wasn't sure about that especially when nothing appeared to be happening. But Garrus likewise started to assure him that Liara was going to see to it that these particular news casters would end up looking like fools. And something was being planned, because exactly two weeks prior to the wedding, Tali was deftly removed from the cabin of the Normandy and taken off to another place according to an ancient human tradition which Hannah Shepherd, John's mother, adroitly assisted in.

"What is going on?" asked John in an Omni-tool-letter.

"A surprise," replied Tali. And regardless of how John tried to get it out of her, she for once remained as tight as a tick on the topic.

And so on the 26th of January, in the year 2188, Tali's '19th' birthday at 1345 hours, John was pacing in a thick and frilly formal outfit along with Garrus, Ken, Joker, James, and Steven. Garrus was best man. Just down the hall in another room, was Tali, and her bridesmaids Gabby, Miranda, Jack, Liara, and Dr. Chakwas.

"Always a bridesmaid, never a bride," Karin had sighed.

Tali had wanted a couple of her girl friends from her childhood as bridesmaids as well. But circumstances, chiefly having to do with Liara's handling of the media obnoxious blitz, made that impossible so she settled for her friends on the Normandy. Fortunately, since Tali's childhood girlfriends were unaware of what a Bridal Party entailed, none of them ever realized that they had been treated in a matter which would have suggested to a human woman that they had been snubbed.

"You've been married now for over two years so why are you nervous?" groaned Joker. He was watching John pace while remaining seated in a wheel chair to protect him for the event which was being held by EDI, who was, in defiance of every ancient tradition, standing in the room with the groom and groom's men.

"Nothing has been done about the press coverage," snapped John. "You've seen Tali's side of the church, all her friends and relations are there and they are all in those damned suits and the press is making fun of them I just know it."

"Not that you can do anything about it," replied Joker, "And besides, you yourself noted she reminded you of a duck way back. I've looked out there when I can. Every time something interesting happens, all those Quarian helmets just shift, almost in unison, it's really kind of funny to watch."

"You're not making this any easier," observed Garrus.

"Now now Commander," advised Ken placing his hand on John's shoulder. "Don you be worryin tew much about the press aught there. I've talked with a few of my friends and their lads about the press and we're gonna give them a right nice reception afterwards if they say anythin which so much as suggests a smear at me and Gabby's dearest engineerin friend."

"So after the wedding we have a Scottish riot for the reception," observed Joker. "Hey, that's a way to celebrate I've got to see."

"You will not be allowed to participate, Jeff," suggested EDI. "But I will allow you to watch at a safe distance."

"But Mom!" protested Joker. "I've been such a good boy!"

"Whoa," suggested James. "I didn't know that the Scots could riot."

"Because we prefer doin it in the pub and then it's called a brawl," replied Ken.

"Well that explains the thick hardwood furnishings," mused Steven. "I always wondered about that."

"And there are drinks handy for brief breaks between breaking faces," added Garrus. "I think I approve of the arrangement as well."

It was about at this juncture, that a high pitched, alien shriek came from the brides' room. John recognized it immediately.

"Tali's in trouble!" he cried. And with a speed which suggested it was almost magical, he, Garrus, James, Ken, and Steven all had pistols out and left Joker in the room.

"So um me and EDI will be back for you when . . . Um," was what Joker said.

The men dashed to the rescue only to be stopped by a blue biotic field administered by not only Miranda, but Liara.

"But Tali!" cried John.

"You are not allowed to see the bride until she makes her entrance," said Miranda very firmly.

"I heard her scream," argued John.

"And we were in the room when it happened. You think we don't have pistols too?"

"Then why did she scream?"

"Hold out your hand," said Miranda.

John, somewhat baffled, did as he was told and Miranda dropped a small bola spider into his open palm. John looked at the small creature, barely a half an inch long. It half crawled half hopped over his hand looking to see if there were any tasty bugs in the vicinity for it to eat.

"It landed on her wedding dress," explained Miranda. "With it's mate, who, as you might imagine, did not survive the encounter."

"But did you have to use the effen bouquet?" came a muffled but very irritated Jack's voice from beyond the door. "Flowers are not cheap around here right now and we had to import those roses from . . ."

And with that, Miranda gently guided the men back to their waiting station. Fifteen minutes later, the wedding began.

Like most churches, there were rows of pews, capable of seating six to eight people each, with a center aisle down to the front where the altar was placed upon a raised dais. On the left, were all the Quarian guests, Admirals, Tali's relations from her mother and father's side, and many of her class mates from her schooling days, as well as friends of hers through her engineering times on the Neema. On the right was John's family, his mother in particular, friends from way back, and Admiral Hackett. The humans, few of whom had met a Quarian, let alone sat across the aisle occupied by over a hundred of them, would cast curious or suspicious glances with some women actually clutching their purses extra tightly.

As for the Quarians, none of them had been in a human religious ceremony before, let alone one as elaborate as a Catholic one. There were acolytes who lit the candles, women's guild members who laid out flowers, ushers who guided them to their respective pews, and so whenever something new happened, most of the Quarians would note it and watch it, trying to figure out why something was being done, and since Quarians lacked good peripheral vision, that explained the sudden mass head shifts which would take place.

But then the piano began to play (since the church had never been able to afford an organ) and Admiral Raan was escorted to her seat in the left front while Captain Hannah Shepherd was escorted to her seat on the right front. Then the back doors opened and down came the bride's maids, all in white with black embellishments woven into the dresses which suggested themes of flowers and birds. Each of them had been given a rose to hold as they came down the aisle, but John noted that they were missing those. He had a sneaking suspicion why, given what he had heard Jack say. He looked at her and noted she actually looked a bit feminine in her dress. Her hair was still shaven with that top ponytail and there was 'the ink' around her neck. But the dress was long sleeve with a low hemline and there were white shoes and white gloves to make out the ensemble.

And then the doors opened again and Tali stepped out.

John had been right in his suspicions that the cameras had been recording the Quarians so that everyone could see Tali's friends and relations shifting their heads. In fact, one rather obnoxious human first news station had sped up the head shifts so that it looked like the Quarians were suffering from a bobbing head nervous tick syndrome. So naturally all the cameras were on the center aisle so that all of humanity could see this helmeted creature dressed in a bridal dress come down the aisle. The humor, the press was certain, would not be lost on the entirety of humanity.

However, Tali's visage disappointed them. In fact, stunned more than a few of the male news casters, and provoked jealous admiration from some of the women commentators.

Liara had 'fixed them good'.

For Tali was not wearing a helmet. Instead, a small ring around the neck of her suit had been installed which projected a biotic shield around her entire head which kept all foreign particles out. It had been one of the reasons why Jack, Miranda, and Liara had ended up in the bridal party because they would be needed to maintain the field for several hours. The ancient human adage that there is no such thing as an ugly bride proved true. Tali was looking stunning. Her hair, now just a little below the shoulder, was bright glossy, black and reflecting the blue sheen which naturally come from such black hair as well as the biotic field which covered her head with a faint glow. Her eyes were catching the multiple colors from the stain glass windows and she was, as she always did when she was feeling a little self-conscious, biting her lower lip with her upper teeth which looked like, to the distant cameras, a delicate smile. And Miranda had known the right shade of lipstick to apply to her lips (which Tali hated because it was levo and tasted bitter) to make those light pink lips look just a little more full and redder.

"Looks like we might have to fight off the boys, men," suggested James as a quiet aside. "She's like an angel!"

"If I know Tali," whispered Garrus back, "There's a very powerful shotgun under that skirt somewhere she can easily access."

The dress was, like the bride's maids, white but there were blue threaded illustrations of birds and flowers across the skirt and front. Her gloves where likewise white as were the shoes. For the entire ensemble was designed to lightly lay over her suit. She had been supposed to carry a bouquet of a dozen roses with baby's breath and fern, but the bridal bouquet was short a few roses, about three, and four of them looked a bit battered, and five of them looked as if they had been put in at the last moment. But the exposed face and the biotic field literally lent an aura of the divine to her visage. And John smiled, not only because she looked more beautiful than he had ever remembered her looking but also because all of humanity had just been shown how fundamentally dishonest much of their press was. And given how they had treated her in the past few weeks, revenge was sweet.

As for the congregation, there were a few oohs and ahs from the woman on John's family while Hannah simply clasped her hands together and beamed because this was the first time she had seen the face of the woman whom her son had so often talked about in their correspondence. The Quarians were amazed and noted the engineering which had gone into the ring design, but Tali's girl friends were busy trilling because they likewise thought she was both pretty, and lucky. For them it was the most romantic thing they had ever witnessed another Quarian experience, and not unlike other societies when first exposed to the Catholic Wedding, many of it's intricacies and customs would shortly be incorporated into formal Quarian bonding ceremonies as well for now that the Quarians had left the Migrant Fleet, they were beginning to rediscover some of their ancient customs which had been lost in the flight from the Geth.

The ceremony was typical enough. There were readings from the Bible, the homily by the Priest on the importance of marriage, including why it was permissible for a Human to marry a Quarian. Then there was the vows which were made between the two, and then the Eucharist. It was at that juncture that there was another memorable event. For Joker and James, while John was unaware, had painted a bright orange fluorescent "Save Me" on the soles of his shoes. And since both he and Tali were required to kneel at this moment, the entire congregation saw the message. The humans were tittering, but the Quarians were baffled because they couldn't read English. Of course, those Quarians who had it explained afterwards were still baffled, if not offended, since Quarians had little in the way of fear associated with the responsibilities of having a bond mate. As Tali was not Catholic, she received a blessing while John was able to partake both of the body and blood. And then they were formally introduced to the congregation as Mr. and Mrs. John Shepherd and permission to kiss the bride was granted.

It was at this point that John (with Tali's prior knowledge) did something not seen before. He did not dare kiss her for in so doing, he would have to put his face through the bio-field which was protecting her from the pollutants and allergens of England. So instead of kissing her on the mouth which was what the humans were expecting and the Quarians would have been scandalized by (since that was something only bond-mates did while linking their suits) he took her gloved hand and kissed it instead. Even that was a bit risqué for the Quarians but their Khelish programs which explained the ceremony informed them that it was symbolic of the 'sealing of the agreement' which was known as the consummation which would take place afterwards. There was embarrassed tittering on the Tali side of the aisle with a bit of 'huh?' from the John side.

Then they were down the aisle and after a few pictures off to change and head to the reception. The changing was another adjustment in the overall ceremony since the wedding dress was designed to go over the suit. But that extra layer of cloth was just that, a covering and not designed to be danced in or eaten in. So Tali had decided that they would get into something less formal for the reception so she wouldn't have to deal with the relative speaking fragility of the dress. They changed their clothing, John into a formal Navy uniform and Tali put on her purple poncho with gold banding and a nice amethyst necklace over her suit, but left the biotic ring on so she would not have to wear her helmet during the reception. The reception itself had been put into a room where the air had been triple filtered. There was a sanitization field which everyone passed through to get to, and there was a separate buffet table for the dextro eaters which put everything selected into food tubes which Tali and her Quarian guests could safely consume. The two buffet tables were on opposite sides of the reception area and a portrait of Tali hung over the Dextro table while a picture of John hung over the Levo. Both pictures were of them when they were kids, something which made both of them feel a little self-conscious but Hannah and Raan both insisted. Hannah, because she was John's mother, and Raan because she was standing in for Tali's departed mother. Tables for the seating of guests were between the two buffet tables on one end of the room while the band and the dance floor were on the other.

When they arrived at the reception, and the formal introductions were made, they proceeded to their table where Garrus and Liara were seated with them as well as the rest of the wedding party. Liara was in a very smug mood, for the last fifteen minutes of the air commentary on the wedding was of embarrassed news services explaining why their prior artistic renderings had proven so apocryphal, or at least wildly inaccurate.

"I find it interesting," observed Liara to Tali, "That humans seem to think that if a person is pretty or beautiful, they can't be capable of doing bad things. So over and over again there are these waves of E-mails asking 'How can she be a thief?' that the press is having a hard time explaining."

Tali sighed. "I wish it didn't have to be done this way, but damn it! If they were going to try to spoil Yahn's wedding day like that, then they deserve it."

"But Tali? Isn't it your wedding day too?" asked Liara. She had found the use of language by Tali quite odd.

Tali shrugged. "I married Yahn when I bonded with him back on the Normandy . . . Over two years ago already! This was for him and his mother."

"But wasn't it special?"

"It was . . . nice . . . kind of fun. We had nothing like this on the Migrant Fleet. The party is going to be nice, one last chance to see all of you before we fly off to Rannoch, but Liara . . . For me it was being woken up by his soft caresses and looking into my eyes after all those sedatives wore off of him the next morning. For me . . . that was the most important and special time in my life. This . . . this was yust a ritual. Yahn seems to think there's something supernatural about it, at least that's what the Priest said. But . . ." she shrugged. "I don't feel any different."

"Your Quarian sensibilities are putting a damper on my mood," threatened Liara.

"Oh I'm sorry Liara," cried Tali who leaned over and hugged her. "I didn't mean it that way, it's yust being able to bond with him in our cabin on the Normandy was so special and wonderful for me that nothing else can compare. I mean Liara, you weren't there but we all thought we were not coming back alive from that. I thought I would die before I got to bond with him. That morning, it was like . . . He had come back to me from the dead all over again. I mean, when he had Yames and Yavik carry me back to the Normandy with all that shrapnel in me and I thought I would die it wasn't half as heart wrenching as seeing him running for me on the Collector Base as the floor fell away. At the time, when he said, 'Go!' I was in tears thinking I'd never see him again, but at least I had had him first. He had become my bond mate. I had been his. He had been mine. There was . . . What do the humans say? Closure."

Liara mused about that for a moment. "I suppose that makes sense," she presumed. "Alright, you're forgiven for not being all a bubbly and butterfly at the reception. I guess I liked all the ritual and stuff that made it such a pretty thing, and the way that Priest defended you and John for doing this when all those human first jerks have been suggesting that John was being deviant."

"Liara? You're calling Yahn, Yahn. Not Commander? Why?"

Liara shrugged. "He's no longer my commander, but he is my friend. And that's what you call humans who are your friends."

"Oh," mused Tali. "Yeah, he did say that when he told me to call him that, close friends, family . . . and the woman I am in love with. Those were his words. I've been calling him Yahn ever since. Now you will be too. I'm yealous . . . a little anyway."

"But Tali," laughed Liara. "It still is different. You call him Yahn. I say John. You think it's the same, but that's because you can't say the juh sound. And believe me. John loves hearing you say Yahn. Even if you were to start calling him John, he'd probably ask you to call him Yahn instead."

Tali seemed pensive for a moment, then she sighed and smiled.

"I supposed that works," she concluded. "Though I never thought it would be so crucial that I can't speak an English word without an accent."

There was more small talk for about a half an hour and then John stood up and walked into the center of the reception area where the members of the wedding party would dance when the mood took them. The band went silent and John began to speak.

"Once upon a time, on the first Normandy, we were having a little reception to welcome Liara to the crew. It was a last bit of fun and enjoyment before she was to be introduced to the initiation rite of Team Specter which was known affectionately as N7 Drill."

Liara groaned and rolled her eyes while other members of the teams looked at each other and nodded.

"It was also the night that I fell in love with Tali, though I did not know it at the time. She merely came in and asked permission to join Liara so that Liara would not have to go through that alone. And I thought to myself that if I ever found a human woman like that I would marry her in a second." He paused. "I mean what I can say? I thought Quarians were not at all interested in humans. I'm glad to say I was wrong. Because I never did find a girl as good as Tali."

Tali started to hide her eyes while a chorus of 'auws' rose up from the human side and 'coos' rose up from the quarian side.

"Anyway, at this little party, I was asked by Joker to play something on my piano and I said no on the grounds that I had nothing worth playing and playing for. It was a bit of a struggle of wills there. Well," and he paused. "I have something worth playing and playing for. So if Tali will be put in a chair right there so I can play to her . . ."

"OH! Nonononononononono!" began Tali.

"Garrus? Do you remember the drill?"

"James and I are on it," replied Garrus grinning. And the next thing Tali knew was that her chair was being picked up, with her still in it, by James and Garrus. And before she could remember that by leaping forward she might escape, she was seated in the center of the dance floor. John called up his piano holograph and sat down. He looked at Tali, who was in the process of covering her eyes with her palms, and shook out his fingers.

"I've been working on this here and there for over a year," he explained. "So in theory it should be of sufficient quality to enable you to hear it without cringing."

There was a bit of chuckling in the audience.

And he began to play the love theme to Fleet and Flotilla, but with some small embellishments which he had added to that music he had downloaded during their stay in Anderson's apartment. Of course the vid had been very popular with Tali's friends so naturally they all enjoyed it immensely.

Then after a few flourishes on the theme, John slowed it down and began to sing. It was his own lyrics to the tune, something he thought was worth singing, and worth singing to someone else. Instead of the one verse, John had written four. And while it might not have been the sort of tune that would have become popular, it had it's impact for that audience. For Tali's friends, who had likewise loved that vid, it was as if it had come true for Tali, and they were giving her all sorts of Quarian trills and coos which caused her to be even more embarrassed. She was covering her eyes, swinging her head back and forth, and doing little kicks with her feet. But at the same time, she understood as well that he had made that love story come as much alive for her as he could. And suddenly, what had been just a ritual for her, became a very special memory. Yes, she was embarrassed. Yes, she was self-conscious. But it was a song that she would want sung to her on her birthday every year for the rest of her life.

_"Sweetest Tali my delight,_  
_Who has eyes so shining bright,_  
_It is with you in my arms,_  
_That I have the strength to fight._

_You so freely gave the greatest gift,_  
_That ever I could ask,_  
_On that night I first was gazing,_  
_At the girl behind the mask."_

_You are Tali my delight,_  
_And with you the world is right,_  
_Come to me my love be near,_  
_In this darkest coldest night._

_Mid the brightest stars, or coldest space,_  
_Where I might be called to roam,_  
_I will boldly go, for now I know,_  
_That with you I am home._

_Darling Tali, my delight_  
_You are precious in my sight,_  
_Let me gaze into those eyes,_  
_Of such luminescent white._

_Let me hold to you and dream with you,_  
_Through all my living days,_  
_Hand in hand we'll stand together,_  
_As we go through life's dark maze._

_Lovely Tali, my delight,_  
_With your eyes so shining bright,_  
_Let us build ourselves a home,_  
_'Neath the rays of Tikkun's light._

_May I live sufficient time with you,_  
_To wash away my scars._

_Hand in Hand we'll rise to reach the stars."_

And then he brought the melody to a close and turned off the piano. There was polite and 'oh how sweet' applause from his side of the family. But Tali's friends all got up and surrounded her and proceeded to tell her in so many words as to how jealous they were of her and she was so lucky to have such a really neat bond mate. And so Tali got over her initial embarrassment and got to gush for a moment over 'her Yahn'.

"And now," began the Bandleader, 'it's time for the Wedding Dance."

"Get out your cameras!" shouted Joker. "And witness the Shepherd Shuffle!"

John grinned and Tali's eyes went bright pink while all her friends began to ask, "You mean he dances as well as he sings? Even with those legs that only bend that one way?"

Tali's head was once again bowed and she was holding one hand on her brow while John walked up and took her in his arms. Again there was some embarrassed tittering from the Quarians and then John put one hand around her waist and held the other out.

"I don't think I'll embarrass you too much," he suggested.

"Quarians don't publicly touch like this," she replied in a low voice filled with dread. "You've already scandalized all my friends, and relations, _and_ the Admiralty board," she finished. "And now they're going to discover you _don't_ dance!"

And as the music began slow and sweet, John softly and gently swayed her around the floor. It was still the Shepherd shuffle of course, but he had set it up in such a fashion that it looked like it was a genuine dance. So Tali had to admit that he had not embarrassed her that much.

"That's so cool!" cried Joker. "Even I can dance that way." He stood up, took EDI and they came out and joined John and Tali. EDI of course figured it out quickly enough. And because of that, coupled with her intimate knowledge of Joker's vulnerabilities, she was the perfect partner for him. And for Joker it was a moment in which he was able to do something he had never been able to do in his entire life.

"Who would have thought that the Shepherd Shuffle could be turned into something classy and yet romantic?" he observed looking over at John and Tali.

"I have a secret Joker," admitted John. "This was a dance my grandmother would dance with my grandfather when I was a kid staying a week or two with them between mom and dad's tour of duty shifts."

"So it's one of the oldies then," said Joker. "Back when they tried to invent dances that people who couldn't dance could dance to."

Then as the music picked up the tempo, he retired to the table where he and Garrus had drinks, traded lies with Joker, James, and Javik, and watched as Tali and her friends began that series of leaps and jumps and quick steps to the music that Quarians are able to do given their legs are so multi-jointed.

The dancing went on for a couple of hours so the guys got some good time in trading their respective exaggerations of manly prowess, and after making sure Liara was not around to record them, Javik recalled things from his cycle in order to improve his 'score'. He had some happy memories, little bits here and there where good things had happened. Now that the Reapers were dead, it had been as if a great sorrow had been lifted up from him. There was gone that dread of futility which had so marked his first two years of life after his awakening.

"So what's this I hear about you and Liara on a quest to find other Protheans in stasis?" asked Joker.

"Well I will be a partner on this enterprise as well," said Garrus. "At least as long as Liara and I are on speaking terms."

"Yes," replied Javik. "It had been my initial goal to end my life, for my mission was complete and I was the last of my kind. But when Commander Shepherd suggested that there might be more Protheans in stasis, it dawned on me that a greater victory against the Reapers could be achieved if the Protheans came back as a true race among the many races of the galaxy. So even if it never happens, it is a worthy goal. And it gives my life purpose, for I remain seeking vengeance, only a different kind of vengeance."

James nodded. "And it's the sort of thing hero's do," he added.

"How's Myra?" asked Joker looking at James. "She never comes to these things, you know."

"Well before the Reapers were defeated, she was like, in prison?" answered James. "And now she's embarrassed. She says she can't look Commander Shepherd in the eye, especially after she bragged about how he'd want her back and she knows now that he was right about the love thing."

John laughed. "Well tell her that we'll try not to tease her too much about how close she came to killing all of us."

"Yeah man," mused James. "I look into her eyes and like, I remember that look she had on her face before she sealed us up in that tube, and it's . . . this girl now wants to sleep with me? Is she serious or am I not going to wake up from this afterwards?"

"Should be a wedding night for the records," suggested Garrus. "You'll be sure to record it on some level for us all right?"

"Are you crazy man?"

"Seriously James, this is the sort of event which might merit being sealed up in the archives so Liara can play it for future generations," added Joker.

"Over my big dead body hombres!"

"See boys and girls? Here's where James is being used . . .and here's where James is being abused!"

"This conversation is OVER!"

"I tried that human, it doesn't work," advised Javik.

Finally, it was time to call it a night. John and Tali dashed down the gauntlet between the guests and were pelted with wheat seeds, a more recent custom which suggested both fertility in child birthing as well as a reference to how many grains made up a single loaf of bread, a reference to the Eucharist as well as Marriage itself. It also satisfied the earth first movement which had been annoyed at the custom of throwing things at the wedding couple since it had been first discovered that the ancient custom of throwing rice killed little birds when the rice expanded in their stomachs. Not that anyone actually had ever tested the theory to see if birds were stupid enough to eat that much rice. There was a very fancy sky-car waiting for them, which took off and headed for the dock where they would board the ship which would take them to Rannoch.

The driver, who had been informed that he was driving a newly wed couple, got the vehicle into the drive for a bit, and then looked back at them and smiled.

"You ready for the wedding night?" he asked.

John and Tali were sound asleep, the exhaustion of a year and a half of stress and a big celebration all compiling together. Tali's head was resting on John's shoulder, and John's head was resting on top of Tali's head.

"Well now I've seen everything," the driver mused. "A couple too tired to consummate their marriage."

It was about eight hours later, after they had boarded their ship, a refurbished Quarian vessel now dedicated to carrying passengers between the stars in luxury, after they had unpacked in their cabin, after they had finally woke up after another five hours of long luxuriant sleep with no responsibilities or crises to wake up to, that they 'consummated' their marriage. Then relaxed and in their cabin bed together, holding each other in their arms, they talked about all sorts of things, the wedding, the reception, the love song, the home they would build on Rannoch, and when they would adopt. It was four days of rest and relaxation. And if there was any boredom, neither John or Tali recognized it. Nothing to do after having to do so much was a very nice change of pace. The only downer was that after their one love making session, Tali was back in her suit for the duration, and had to be treated for a mild fever by the ship's doctor who clucked his tongue at her for risking her health just because she wanted to make love to her bond-mate.

"Still totally worth it," she insisted.


	41. Chapter 41 - A Married Life

And now comes the happily ever after part of the story.

Seriously now, how do you sweep through all the years of a married life? As the classic English movie director Alfred Hitchcock once queried, "What is drama, but life, with all the dull bits cut out?" John and Tali had saved the galaxy, the galaxy was grateful, but there was work to do and things to plan and people to meet and greet and well, there was nothing more which needed shooting up because there was an awful lot of good feeling going around. The Geth were heroes, the Quarians were heroes, the Asari were heroes, the Turians were heroes, the Batarians were heroes, the Volus were heroes, well, you get the idea. So suffice to say there were an awful lot of dull bits in the John and Tali household which didn't make the cut. We don't get interested in the types of shampoos they used, or the color of the carpet they picked for the kid's bedrooms, unless of course there was a really wild and rambunctious fight over it, which there wasn't, so the next few years are going to go by rather quickly.

February 2nd, 2188, an ordinary passenger vessel was landing at Aviva Spaceport on Rannoch. Like every other town on the planet, it was a collection of mostly mass produced units stacked together and adjusted to pass for a spaceport. Real building was only just being marked out and discussed. Everywhere John and Tali looked, they could see Geth platforms engaging in typical service labor while Quarians milled about doing other forms of labor, all of them in suits, some still with helmets, but a few with heads out. John was able to see a male Quarian for the first time and noted that their heads were a bit longer than the females. Likewise their hair tended to bush out more once it was allowed to grow. It reminded him a little of a lion's mane.

Admiral Raan and (now) Captain Kal'Reeger were there to meet them. John likewise got to see their faces for the first time. Raan had a motherly cast to her face. Older, a bit rounder and softer at the edges, while Kal seemed to posses that universal military granite chipped face which gently twinkled when smiling, but likewise just as capable of looking as hard as flint when the pressure was on.

"I'm pleased, but likewise surprised that there is no press or reception," observed John as he and Tali started to work themselves (and their luggage) from the ship.

"Everyone is waiting for the Normandy to arrive," explained Raan. "Since you were the Normandy's captain, it would be inconceivable for you to cease being the captain of the vessel, so they think you'll arrive on the Normandy."

"A misunderstanding Sir, we thought best not to correct," added Kal.

"Nice," said John and Tali almost simultaneously. They put their luggage in the back of the sky-car. They were going to have a completely ordinary arrival to their new home and both of them were looking forward to something utterly dull and uneventful.

"Any larger items?" asked Kal.

"That's it, our whole property," replied John.

"I thought humans needed massive sky-vans to carry their stuff," exclaimed Raan.

"Many do," answered John. "But as a ship's captain and a single guy, I really didn't have much and Tali, being a sensible Quarian girl, did not allow me to accumulate more."

Raan nodded her head in approval.

"So Ma'am," began Kal.

"Kal?" said Tali with a bit of resignation in her tone. "I'm Tali and this is Yahn. And we're not military any more so you don't have to be that respectful."

"If you say so Ma'am," replied Kal. "But what I was asking was if you were ready to select the property for your house?"

"We are," said John. "But how does this work?"

"Well Sir, we don't have much in the way of fighting or disputes over property. There's only a little over seventeen million of us and a whole planet capable of housing billions, so right now folks pretty much pick where they want their home to be and get to where they want with sky-cars."

"Just like that? No realtor, no papers to sign at the court house?"

"No sir, you just pick it and I send the dimensions and local to the local property board via the omni-tool and unless you get too 'grasping' . . ."

"How does one get grasping?" asked John.

"Well if you were to insist on an entire billion acres for your home, you had better have a good reason for something that large."

"Nah, only two acres for us," answered John.

"Yahn! That's huge! We can't possibly . . ."

"Tali!"

"I'm not going to just let you carve out a whole continent like that we have others to think about . . ."

And that was the start of the first of the fights over the new home. Of which there were several.

The selection of the property was the first disappointment, there was no ocean front by the spaceport. So John and Tali began the long process of flying over various vistas all about no more than thirty minutes by sky-car from all the important parts of the town and noted that there were an awful lot of wadis, some of which actually had small streams running down them, which would get bigger during the rainy season. That looked like a prospective 'with a view' location and so they started to look along the cliff edges. Then about three afternoons later, they landed on one bit of property which was well watered in spite of the fact that it overlooked a very wide and deep wadi and growing on that property, just twenty meters from the cliff, was this tall waving tree, a cross between a redwood and sequoia palm.

"Yahn!" cried Tali leaping out of the sky car and dashing over to the tree. "It's beautiful!" She proceeded to kick off her boots and scurried up to the first branch which was about three meters off of the ground. For a second John just stood amazed that her toes wrapped around the trunk and enabled her to grip it so strongly that she was up to the branch in a matter of seconds. And then she stood on the branch, her toes wrapped around it, while holding to the trunk with her left hand, and she started to trill at him, while her multi-colored poncho formed a perfect v over the top of her suit. Her black hair was almost shimmering blue, and her eyes were catching the sunlight, sparkling faintly . . . shining bright.

"Yahn!" she sang to him "Climb up! Come up! Hlrlrlrlrlrlrlrlrlrlrlrlreeeeee!"

He had the funniest look on his face. It was both so loving, joyful, and yet distant. It was as if he was looking across a vast chasm of time.

"Yahn?"

"It's okay Tali. I just remembered something. And as I remembered it I realized just how important it was for my life. And the funny thing was, I had no idea at the time."

"Are you coming up?"

"Tali? I can't possibly climb that tree. I don't have cute toes which can wrap themselves around trunks and branches. But I want to build the house here. I want to see that tree every day for as long as it or I live."

"Why?"

"Because you have been in it."

"Oh Yahn, that's so sweet, but really if you find . . ."

"No, Tali, this is where we're building. And someday, when I can tell you the whole story without breaking up, I'll tell you just how important that tree is to me."

And so that is where they built the house. By Sky-car they were fifteen minutes from the down town of Aviva. Yet at the same time, there were no other homes about. That was how John was able to get his 'two' acres. There was no one else near by so it didn't matter that they only claimed a small area around the house itself. It actually came down to an acre and a quarter when it was done, but since it wasn't two, that seemed to have satisfied Tali.

The building of the house on the other hand, was a new set of issues. First of all, one of the reasons why there was so much pre-fab was simply due to the fact that the planet was barely settled (or resettled if we're going to be precise). There was no local industry for the building materials, and while Quarians were beginning that process, it required more importation than John and Tali had anticipated and the result was that the house was proving more expensive than they had planned. In addition, there was no new money coming in, and so Tali had to get a job quickly in ship repair at the space port while John began the process of learning Khelish. He was already familiar with much of it, but he had to find ways to pronounce those words which he couldn't pronounce accurately in order to be understood. That was going to take a while.

They got a fireplace, and a picture window out the living room. They got a kitchen behind the living room and entry way next to the kitchen, and off to one side, they were able to afford a bedroom and bath. John wanted a nice picture window in the bedroom as well. Tali objected that someone might peak in on them while they were being intimate or changing.

"We're miles from the nearest home, no one can walk out here, we'd hear the sky-car coming. Only an idiot would be worried about someone peaking in," he groaned.

And then the fight began.

The Geth began to connect with John and Tali for the Geth understood in a way that no one else did that these two were in part responsible for the end of the hostilities between them and their creators. Shortly after construction on the house began, a single geth platform engaged them for the express purpose of being the family handyman, maid, babysitter, butler, etc. All he wanted was maintenance and energy, which was easy enough to provide since Tali was an engineer and he could be plugged into a wall socket for recharge. They called him Wooster, after a particular character in an ancient writer's repertoire of stories collectively known as "Jeeves and Wooster". There was a joke with the name, for in the stories, Jeeves was the smart butler and Wooster was the slightly off the mark gentleman. In the Shepherd household, Wooster was the smart butler. He had a small alcove he would put himself into when he wasn't needed and so John and Tali had a greater deal of privacy than they had initially feared they would lack. They appreciated that, given that they were still young marrieds and Tali was once again acclimating, but this time, forever. Wooster always thought he had the better of the deal. For Tali did not just maintain him. She upgraded him extensively over time as well.

The home was finished in time for the rainy season, which was always the second half of the Rannoch year. Rannoch's year proved to be something John had to get used to because it was exactly 241.06 days Earth time. So literally every four months, you would have four months of on and off rain. There were two months in which it rained more frequently with a roughly two week period in which the rain fell every day.

So one evening, Wooster announced that the home was finished, the furniture was moved in, and John carried Tali over the threshold. She initially objected on the grounds that she wasn't a cripple, but John told her that human bond-mates did this for the first home and Tali then acquiesced provided of course he wasn't going to make a habit of it.

Then the first rains began to fall in a few days and then, shortly thereafter, the first flowers of Rannoch began to bloom. And John made a new discovery about Tali.

It was an ordinary evening. John had noticed that there was a nice scent to the air and had opened the windows while Tali had turned on the Vid Projector to watch a new Vid which had just been released titled "The Pilgrim". It was supposed to be a dramatic story of a young Quarian who was going on his Pilgrimage during the time of the Migrant Fleet. John had agreed to watch it with Tali and he had his translator bud in his ears so he felt ready for a new Quarian drama. But as the show started, he began to smell this sweet and fragrant scent of lemons and cinnamon. He put his arm around Tali and she snuggled up to him and another wave of that wonderful smell wafted across his nose. He sniffed and found it was coming from her hair and he began to sniff her hair.

"Yahn!" she objected. "You're distracting me from the program!"

"You smell so wonderful! You don't notice?"

"What? I smell nice stuff yes, but what do you mean it's in my hair?"

"It's in your hair and you smell so good I can't resist you!"

"Yahn! I want to watch this show, quit kissing me. Please! Don't! Stop! Yahn!"

Six minutes later . . .

"I hate you," she breathlessly whispered as he lowered her to the floor, her pants unzipped and off the hips, her blouse open entirely in the front. "I hate you sooo much."

John didn't care, and a few moments later, neither did Tali. They were after all, still young, the house was still new, the carpet was soft and fresh, Tali really smelled good, and she hadn't figured out yet what John would do to her that got her past the point of no return. She would figured that out eventually, but first there would be an awful lot of love making sessions under the couch before the Vid Projector during the rainy season.

As for "The Pilgrim" Tali was able to watch the premiere episode which was rerun three days later later in the evening while John was busy showing Wooster how they wanted the front yard gardened.

And so the first rainy season passed by. Each week Tali seemed to have a new scent to her and she got used to the fact that John would routinely stick his nose into her hair, something which unsettled her at first, especially when John had an allergic reaction and sneezed into her face. She was rather crabby for the rest of the night over that.

2188 blended into 2189 and they celebrated two more wedding anniversaries. For their fourth anniversary John took Tali out camping to the beach. The first thing that Tali noted was that the drive was over six hours long. There were dozens of really popular camping sites that were already marked out on the nav-maps which were found in every sky car and three of them were located on or by very nice beaches. And she remained in the dark as to what John was intending, even after the sky car landed on a wide sandy beach where two pillars of rock nearly came together. They got out of the car and Tali walked about for a second clearly wondering why he had taken her all the way out here for camping. Then slowly it dawned on her and she began to grin. And with a saucy walk, she came over and planted a very passionate kiss on him. He returned the favor and her response was to up the ante with an even more passionate kiss. Three kisses later he was unbuttoning her blouse and then another sky car landed on the beach just 25 yards down the way and a Quarian family with two children and a third clearly on the way hopped out. The father elected to ignore them and got out the auto tent equipment which told John and Tali that they were going to camp here as well. The mother, having her suspicions, given how much physical contact had been present between Tali and John, gave them a rather chilly stare. Tali, as unobtrusively as she could, buttoned her blouse back up and the two of them set up their tent, or tried to because the two kids, never having seen a human before, were more than a little curious and persisted in resisting their mother's insistent instructions to stay away from 'that other couple'.

By the second evening, they had gotten to know the family and had some nice conversations around the camp fires while the kids, both young boys, once they had gotten over their initial shyness regarding this strange human who ate sour tasting food, discovered that the human really knew how to play army. Even so, John and Tali were discouraged because by the third day, they discovered that this little inlet was a very popular camping site for families since it was invariably close to the spot where their particular ship had first touched down on Rannoch. Nearly all Quarian families liked taking their children to the first spot where they had touched the home-world for the first time. This beach, being sheltered, was a perfect spot to camp and then walk or take a short flight to the site. One week later, as Tali and John packed up their tenting gear, there were five other Quarian families on the spot.

"No rocks," Tali sighed. "Not even real ones."

By 2190, John had mastered Khelish and was able to get employment at the Quarian Navy HQ as an N7 style trainer. It was a point of pride for the Admirals that they had him since it was his fighting style which had first regained them Rannoch, second, protected it from the Reapers, and third, ended the Reaper threat forever.

And John and Tali began to think about children. The orphans from the war were mostly swept up, but there were still freak accidents where young babies and children were suddenly bereft. It wasn't very often of course, the Quarian population was still way under eighteen million, though slowly climbing. But John and Tali got a break since they were John and Tali. There was no doubt that they would be fine parents, at least as far as the Quarian population was concerned. Both of them, by staying out of politics, refusing to endorse any policies (at least publicly), refusing to comment upon any rumors, managed to avoid the fluctuations of public favor. They remained, once upon a time heroes and heroines. And so they were quietly put at the front of the line, though no one really knew about it, least of all Tali, would have refused such a favor, and John, who would have gotten into another set of fights with Tali over it.

And so, in mid 2090, the adoption agency brought to their household a little Quarian baby girl, only three pounds four ounces, who parents had been killed in a sky-car accident. She had blond hair and a sweet little face and so they named her Kiwi. And Tali wanted to nurse her, but of course since Tali had never gotten pregnant, her breasts had not fully matured. So it was off to the doctors where she was given a regimen of shots which released specific hormones and endorphins into her blood which told her breasts that she was pregnant, and then when a few weeks has passed, that she had just given birth. And so, eight weeks after Kiwi had been delivered to their home, she placed the little child to her breasts, and Kiwi latched on and began to suckle.

Tali watched (and felt) this for a moment and began to be agitated.

"I imagine it's not comfortable," suggested John.

"It's not that. I can't feel anything going out. Am I feeding her? Is she going to starve?"

"Tali, she looks like she's getting something out of it I don't see her letting go I'm sure . . ."

"Yahn I don't think she's eating what are we going to do I . . ."

And then Kiwi spit up. Breast milk, and stomach juices, spilled all over Tali's front and onto her lap. Tali burst into tears.

"Oh come now Kitten, I'll get a rag . . ."

"Yahn, I'm feeding her! I'm really feeding her. I'm going to be a real mother!"

John went and got the rag and cleaned Tali up while she continued to sniffle, cry a little, and feed Kiwi. And then, after about fifteen minutes, switched breasts, found Kiwi was still hungry, and then John heard the heelrou start. It was a different heelrou than he had heard on the Normandy or when they were just laying together. It was a more melodic heelrou, and she swayed just a little back and forth while she was doing it. He had never seen her smile so sweetly, nor had he ever seen her seem to be so happy.

And so every 18 months for the next few years, the agency brought another child to them. And for the next eight years, John would hear that melodic heelrou as Tali nursed, and then rocked their little Quarian children.

Next came Karo, a boy who was blind. His eyes were not white, they were a dull grey, almost black, like his hair. His parents had been ship's engineers, and there was little work for them on planet, so they were poor, and since they could not afford the medical treatments, they had, in tears, given him up for adoption. After him came another girl, brown haired which John wanted to name Alice after his favorite grandmother, the one in Maine who had that 'magical' house he never had forgotten for the lights which played across the bedroom. And then came Leo, who's hair in particular would bush out as he got older. So the two oldest were given good Khelish names while the two youngest were given Human names.

In 2197, there was a family portrait done with John and Tali with their four children. There had been changes. They had managed to get two more bedrooms and a second bath built onto the house. The four children were educated by Tali for there was no public school system among the Quarians given that it had been impossible to do on the Migrant Fleet and so the Quarians took responsibility for their own children. For this reason, Tali stopped working since education was a full time responsibility, even with Wooster's help. And they were not wealthy by a long shot. Most of the funds that John had managed to accumulate during the Cerberus missions and the Reaper War had been spent getting them to Rannoch and build the house. Little had been invested, though Liara did routinely send them tips. Unfortunately they had only a few credits which they could send off to Liara to invest and while there was a small income from that, it never grew quickly and four children put a lot of strain on the household budget.

But luck held out in other ways. While they were never able to leave Rannoch to see friends, their friends were not so strapped for cash. Liara was still the Shadow Broker and she showed up routinely for visits. Garrus, being a chief advisor to the Primarch, was also more than sufficiently endowed in the cash department. He would come routinely to visit, as did John's mother who remained in the Navy for years after the Reaper war. At first, Liara would often come with him, but after a few years, that was no longer the case. Liara had moved on, as so often do the Asari. Garrus was a bit sad about that and so he stayed a few weeks just to have a few drinks, get a few bits of anger and grief out, and then, once he felt he was back on his feet, thanked John and Tali, and went back to Palavan. A few years later, he would come back with his wife, Nyreen. She was tired of Omega. A few years later, they would be bringing their children who always liked visiting Uncle John and Aunt Tali. They were always younger than John and Tali's children, but Leo was close enough to their ages that they were able to get along and do things. And as it turned out Kasumi had once again faked her death and would just pop up in the kitchen on occasion. Of course she always alerted Tali prior by E-mail that she was coming and when to expect her, but she always suddenly de-cloaked in the kitchen, and not rang the door bell.

By then, it was 2198 and Kiwi was on the threshold of puberty. John was amazed at the speed in which Quarian children grew up. Now that he was seeing it for himself, he understood how Tali had been more mature when she was 14 and leaving on her pilgrimage. Kiwi was developing a curious quirk. For she had an 'invisible friend' she would call Doodi. John wasn't initially worried since it was not unusual for children to some times have imaginary playmates. But as he thought about it, it didn't make sense. For Kiwi was popular , she was not lonely or picked on. In fact, she could be very stuck up and had to be punished for being 'mean' to other children on occasion. There was no reason for her to have an imaginary playmate. But likewise, she got more and more interested in religious things, looking forward to evening prayers and sometimes just making them up on her own. The family was going to the Chapel of St. Christopher in the spaceport, a Catholic outpost for humans who were staying over in Aviva. And while there was a small human enclave at Aviva, it had not gotten as big as it would in later years. Kiwi always was ready to go to Mass. So John figured it was just a quirk what came with Quarian children. Tali remained worried, since she understood better that this was very unusual, but the few times she took Kiwi to the psychologists, they were rather baffled since Kiwi's descriptions of Doodi were way too accurate (not to mention consistent) for him to be an 'imaginary friend'. It constituted a study for them, two articles of the case were published in Quarian psychological journals though Tali and John remained oblivious to that.

But Christmas was coming up, the kids always loved Christmas, and so things were forgotten as Advent began. It was a challenge you see to keep the two years straight, for the Catholic year went on as it always did, regardless of which planet it was on, and the Rannoch year likewise was now rapidly becoming the primary means of time measurement among the Quarians. So when one evening Kiwi began to cough, no one noticed it until it had been going on for fifteen minutes and had gotten worse. Tali began to hold Kiwi and John began to dial up the local medical facility and get advice when the coughing began to get really rough and then a curious rattle began as Kiwi sought to intake her breath. Then just as John had a doctor on the line and the possibility of allergic reaction was being hashed out, Kiwi looked up at Tali, coughed a bit more, and said, "Doodi says I have to go now. I love you mah . . ." and she went limp.

For a second Tali just looked at the limp child in her lap.

"Oh no . . . No no . . . Not Kiwi . . . No, not my little baby!" she cried.

"She's okay mommy, she's okay!" assured Alice who always believed what was best while Tali just rocked Kiwi back and forth and wept.

Two days later was the funeral. The doctors diagnosed the cause of death as acute allergic reaction. Sometimes it happened, the child or adult had some weakness to some kind of pollen and they were not able to adapt to it quickly enough. Or, it was a rare type which just hit suddenly. They never knew. It was sad enough for John, but it was devastating for Tali. She got angry and railed that after going through the hell of the Reaper war, when it was everyone else that was losing, it wasn't fair that they got hit with such tragedy when all the horror was supposed to be over. There were a few fights of course because Tali took it out on John, who was still working through his own grief to be able to patiently bear the brunt of Tali's emotions. And it didn't help that Alice kept assuring them that Kiwi would wake up at any minute.

It had been the custom to break down the body on the fleet, to reduce it to it's component chemicals which would be used to maintain the fleet. But John would have none of that. He insisted on a burial, and so Kiwi was buried under the tree that Tali had climbed before they had built the house. It was now a taller tree, overshadowing the master bedroom, and the children had always played around it since it gave them shade in the warm parts of the day. A small tombstone marked the site, her picture carved into the front, with her name and the date of her life. What was particularly poignant was that the three other children would play around the tombstone so that Kiwi could 'join' them for play for a few years afterwards. But eventually, they would grow up. Sympathy cards and visits from friends were the rule for those weeks. It was a sad, but busy Christmas. Those gifts which had been marked for Kiwi were either given to Alice (though she never knew that) or sent to other more needy families.

A few nights after Christmas, Tali and John were once again, as they had so often on the Normandy, just holding on to each other. There was a long conversation on John's experiences with the afterlife. At the end of it, Tali decided that while there was Quarian lore about religious matters, like so many other things, it had gone to the wayside in the great flight at the end of the Morning War. While it was not a Quarian religion, it had substance, good teachings, and community. She had gotten a lot of comfort from the people in that church during the funeral time and so she decided she wanted to join the church.

The priest never told John and Tali how this sent ripples all the way to the Vatican as the church began to hash out if it really ought to allow a non-human to join. It wasn't a case of bigotry issues, for it was the very same institution which had taught humans what bigotry was and why it was wrong. It was the Church which had taught humanity, every single generation since it had been founded, that all humans stood equally before God who judged with no respect to position. The theological problem for the Vatican was this, "did God, when He came to rescue the human race, also come for the rest of the sentient species? Or did He have other plans for them which He had not revealed to the Church since the Church had not needed to know these things." After a few months of consultations (and heated arguments) with the Cardinals, Bishops, and Theologians, the Pope decided on the ancient principle of vox populi vox dei. That being, the Voice of the People is the Voice of God. Since Tali wanted to be Catholic, they would let her.

And so, sixteen months later, at the Easter Vigil, Tali was baptized, confirmed, and received her first communion with a dozen other humans who were likewise joining the church. Half of the congregation expressed surprise, not because a Quarian was joining, but because they didn't know she had not already been a member. Once again Tali found it interesting that the congregation seemed to see her as human in spite of the obvious differences. But remembering her 'suit-rat' days, she found it refreshing. It was nice to be just another woman in the congregation. Tali had a hard time with first communion, as the bread tasted bitter. But the Priest, understanding the issues of dextro and levo, broke off only a tiny piece for Tali as a habit from then on, and as it was a sacrament, it wasn't how much you got, but rather if you did or did not get it. Of course, no one in the Shepherd household had anticipated the subtle influence which Tali's decision would have on the Quarians. She was, after all, the heroine who had led them back to Rannoch, and the story of Moses leading the Israelites to the promised land was a prominent part of the Catholic story as well. And Quarians saw the parallels. Over the next few years, over one and a half million Quarians ended up joining the church. It never got much bigger than that, in so far as it was never more than 7% of the entire Quarian population, but it was sufficient for the Quarians to have their own priests, bishops, and rite. And as the religious sensibilities of the Quarians themselves began to be rediscovered, the Catholic rite had more than a minor influence upon the soon to be rediscovered traditional religious practices of the Quarians themselves, particularly with the ancestor cults of the Quarians and the Catholic custom of Saints.

It was shortly after that momentous Easter that Karo figured out how to turn on John's omni-piano and sat down and began to play it. Of course he was not looking at the lesson book, he was merely experimenting. And because he was merely experimenting, he actually discovered something. Piano chords are three notes, which can be played by a hand which has only two fingers and an opposable thumb. Karo, being blind, had a very good ear for a tune and so soon enough, he was playing the piano skillfully and in a way which was completely adaptive to his three fingered hands. One of the brilliant things about the design of the piano is that you can play it entirely by touch since you are looking at the music. Thus Karo's blindness was not a handicap. The tunes were never as elaborate as human five fingered pieces, but for pop songs and folk songs and playing in a bar or club, it was more than sufficient. Karo began to play at church as he got older, and eventually, that is after another seven years, he would be 'discovered' by the Quarian entertainment industry and as the first Quarian who could play the human piano, he was a sensation. By then he would be 15 and fully grown by Quarian standards. It was to be the start of his career. Alice was 13 and Leo was 12. It was the year 2206.

John and Tali had grown older. Their faces had lost the youthful glow. John's waistline had gained a few inches, and Tali's hips had gained a few more than John, though he never pointed that out to her. But he still found her just as pretty as he always had, if not more so. There were few days in which he didn't just look at those eyes of hers, still flashing bits of light in the sun, or the stars of night. And of course during the rainy season, he was always enjoying the smells of Rannoch she carried with her.

The next three years were active ones. Karo became a full time musician, and married a nice sandy blond haired girl named Serie. By the end of the three years, they had their first child. Like John and Tali, they didn't have much money since music didn't pay a lot unless you were really popular and while Karo could always teach young children and play in the local clubs, he never really had the 'image' which the entertainment industry wanted. For starters he simply wasn't emotional enough to make the scenes which Quarian entertainers did to keep the public interested in them. He was way too balanced with a head on straight. His songs were quiet and thoughtful and about deeper subjects than love. While it did not give him massive popularity, it did give him a decent following which guaranteed that he was a 'sure' thing in the clubs. When John and Tali could, they would give Karo and his growing family gifts which helped them out. Money was still in short supply in the Shepherd household. But Karo had now moved out, some of Liara's investment tips were starting to pay off, and John was now a firmly established teacher in the Naval Academy. They now had a small measure of security. It still wasn't enough for them to be able to fly off planet, and that on occasion hurt. For John was unable to attend the funeral of his mother.

But there was another incident that happened in those three years as well, something which gave John at least, closure of a sort over the death of Kiwi. A vicious set of murders had taken place in Aviva. It was the sort of thing that John had encountered on Omega, but Aviva had been a quiet calm town whose crime had been pickpockets and fights in the bars. It had been a party, with a lot of red sand, and young Quarian girls who had been seduced and killed. And it was Tali who noticed that several of the girls who had been killed had been Kiwi's close friends in school. John could not help but suspect that had Kiwi been alive, she would have been at that party and one of the victims. It was a gang of humans and batarians who did the crime, and some of them had Omega connections which angered John in particular. He sent off a note to Aria requesting that those of the gang who had gotten away with the crime by escaping from Rannoch be dealt with on Omega. Aria replied that it would be bad for business and politely declined.

It was in 2209 that Joker died. His Vrolec's syndrome had caught up with him in a sky-car accident. John and Tali had to miss another funeral because they could not afford the trip. EDI did come to visit shortly thereafter. It wasn't the Normandy without Joker and so EDI 'retired' from active duty and the Normandy was reprogrammed and repurposed. The ship would, as was so often the case with naval vessels, end up as scrap twenty years later, her reputation insufficient for the politicians who wanted new ships now, which they thought would mean new votes from constituents in the next election. Garrus actually tried to pull a few strings to get the Normandy recommissioned as a Turian vessel, but Earth's Parliament accidentally on purpose forgot that the Normandy had originally been a Human/Turian project. Giving her to the Turians would be to admit that they had made a mistake deciding to scrap her. And so the politicians concluded that their prestige was being threatened by the request. Liara however, being the Shadow Broker, managed to get the entire Galaxy informed as to what had happened and the shame of the human voters produced the exact opposite of the election results the politicians had been hoping for. They tried at the last second to make a monument to the Normandy, but you don't make monuments to ships, you make the ship the monument. So even that appeared to be just a slap in the face of the ship which played such a prominent role in the Reaper war.

In the meantime, Aviva was growing. There were a few homes off in the distance which John and Tali could see now. And likewise the Chapel of St. Christopher had been rebuilt as a full fledged Church. And it was in her 14th year that Alice met Andrew. He was your ordinary human guy, his hair was dark brown, he had that goofy adolescent grin that young men are wont to have, even though he was already 19, and he was on his first job in the spaceport. John and Tali liked him and what's more, he was totally smitten by Alice. She was in her full bloom of young adult maturity. Her eyes were particularly flashing, her brown hair billowing in the breeze, and she had a grace when she walked, but more importantly, the two of them could dance together in such a fashion that it was poetry in motion. The two went out for seven months and the Shepherd household was (privately between John and Tali) expecting wedding bells shortly.

Then one early evening shortly after her fifteenth birthday, Alice came staggering into the house, went to her bedroom, slammed the door, and the crying could be heard almost through the whole house. Tali waited for about twenty minutes, then went in and quietly talked with her. While outside John paced and fretted wondering what Andrew had done, likewise thinking about getting out his assault rifle just in case.

Then Tali came out and explained it to him. Andrew had been given the opportunity to start his own farm on Horizon. He had broken it off with Alice since he knew she would be forced to wear a suit 'forever' and he didn't want that to happen to her. John nodded, and went to the Comm link and called him up.

"Captain Shepherd!" came Andrew's voice when he saw the grim face of John on the comm. John's formal title at the Academy was Captain and on Rannoch that carried a lot of intimidation factor weight.

"Andrew, at ease," replied John. "Now tell me what you were thinking when you broke off your relationship with Alice. I know you love her, I can see that in your face even now."

"Well it's like I said to her," stammered Andrew. "I can't force her to wear a suit the rest of her life, and the more I thought about it, where's she going to get food to eat? How will she be knowing she can't have kids? I can't do that to her, she deserves so much more . . . I . . ."

"Son?" began John. "You listen to me and you listen to me good. Do you have any idea how lucky a human guy is to have a Quarian girl in love with him? Do you have any idea how important you are to her?"

"I know I know I know," sighed Andrew. "I really know. I can see her devotion. I've watched you and Mrs. Shepherd and I can see how deeply she loves you. I know, but I can't put her through that kind of hell . . . I"

"Son?" continued John. "Did it ever dawn on you that she wouldn't care? That the most important thing in her life would be that she was with you? Tali was in a suit for years. She didn't care. She and I were never able to have children. She didn't care"

It wasn't entire true of course, but Tali never regretted her bonding with John.

"Alice won't care either. Adopt a few human children so she might have the joy of raising them and remember, she'll be there for you, through the bad and good. Don't be afraid to take her for your wife. It's what she wants more than anything else in the world. She's been in her bedroom crying her heart out for the past forty-five minutes and there's no sign of it letting up. You want to throw away a love that deep? Take my word for it. No woman loves better than a Quarian woman."

"Its' too late!" groaned Andrew. "I'm already on the ship bound for Horizon. I waited until the last moment to tell her because I hated to break it up so much."

"Then we'll send her to you and you can be married there when she arrives," concluded John.

"But the suit . . ."

"We know how to deal with a suit," replied John. "She can wear her mother's, and it will get her through the acclimation process. In the end Andrew, she'll be able to live without it. She only has to adapt to the atmosphere of Horizon."

"She does?" exclaimed Andrew. It was clear he had thought she would remain it in for the rest of her life.

"Yes," replied John. "How do you think I was able to live with Tali?"

"I dunno," stammered Andrew. "I just thought . . ."

"Well think again. You marry that woman and you be happy with her you hear?"

"Sir! Yes Sir!" snapped Andrew who fell into the military synch the moment John hit him with it.

"Now, I'm going to bring Alice in here and you make it up to her okay?"

"Ye . . .Yes Sir!" agreed Andrew.

Two minutes later, a teary eyed Alice found herself on the Comm with Andrew and John quietly shut the door behind them. Two hours later Alice came back out hugged them both and in tears told them she was going to Horizon to get married. It required the sale of the second family sky-car to be able to get sufficient money together to ship Alice off, but as it was only one ticket and only one way they were able to do that.

And so over the next two weeks, Tali got out her old suit, retooled it, fitted it to Alice, trained her in it's uses, and then, with Karo and his family, and Leo, said goodbye to her as she boarded the ship for Horizon.

It was the last time Alice was able to hug her mother.

A week later, the first photo letter from Alice arrived, her with Andrew. He was grinning that goofy grin with his arm around Alice, who's expression was hidden by the old visor.

"Oh, that brings back memories," sighed John. "I remember a Quarian girl like that."

"Who?" asked Tali, fishing for a compliment.

"I think her name was Bertha . . . OW! My arm!"

Over the next few weeks, more photos came through, and wedding pictures were sent and life on the farm began to establish itself. It was two years later that the first picture of Alice out of the suit next to Andrew arrived. They were seated on a bench with the setting sun in the background. Andrew had matured a bit, looking more the farmer, a bit of dirt under the rough hands, and Alice was looking at him, happily smiling, in a billowing blouse which had a few stains on it as well.

It was 2211.

Leo had discovered his inner artist as a young boy. Upon hearing Tali's story of her wedding ring, he had found some copper wire and wove it up into a small ring like John had made once upon a time. Tali found it sweet and kept it. But Leo then started to make Rosaries and Rosary Bracelets which he sold to the Catholic visitors who came through the church at the space port. Then he made a collection of bracelets which he sold on the walkway market where 'native artwork' was sold to the traveling tourists and visitors to Rannoch. But Leo was particularly good. He knew how to place the gems and semi-precious stones perfectly amid the copper, then silver, then gold wire. Then, a jeweler who had a store on the Citadel asked him to come to the Citadel and sell his work in the store there, something which would give that jewelry store an edge in the highly competitive market since Quarian jewelry was a rare thing and hand made would make the pieces unique, something which was in high demand among the fashionable elite of the Citadel.

And so Leo was fitted for his own suit and he too was sent off. Within six years, Leo had his own jewelry line, his face with his billowing mane of brown sandy hair was a trademark in the galaxy. He walked with the hoity toity and hoi poli and would send long and elaborate comm letters mocking the attitudes with his father's style. Of course he grew to be very sophisticated and often had to endure a bit of gentle mockery from his own father when he would come back to visit with his very fashionable Asari wife. Who, before she had married Leo, had been a very high demand dancer. Both Tali and John had given Leo a down the nose look at when they had found that out. But once there were a few Asari grandchildren, the wife, who's name was Fecicia, grew up a bit and got more mature and intelligent. Fecicia had thought the Shepherd's ordinary people because she had no clue as to John and Tali's history. Oh she had been old enough (97) to remember the entire Reaper War from the attack on the Citadel by Sovereign to the final battle on Earth, and of course she had heard of the Normandy and Commander John Shepherd and Admiral Tali'Zorah vas Neema, but when Leo had told her about his mom and dad, John and Tali Shepherd, it had never dawned on her to make the link. So it was a running joke when ever Leo and his wife came to visit that he was coming back to an ordinary Shepherd household who had only saved an ordinary galaxy in an ordinary fashion. Fecicia learned to take the joking in stride, and not only that, when it had dawned on her who she was standing in the presence of, both John and Tali discovered that when Asari are embarrassed, their entire body turns purple.

It was 2221. John was 62. His hair was grey, his skin was beginning to sag, his legs were that pale pasty color that comes from spending decades wearing pants to work. He was no longer a trainer, he was a full fledged teacher in the Academy, well respected, and consulted by the powerful. Tali was 'officially' 52 according to earth years. Her face was rounder, her hair was a duller black. Quarian hair did not turn grey, it merely lost it's youthful luster. They had lived together so long now that the days of their youth seemed like once upon a time far away things for now most of their lives were defined by being together as a couple. They made love maybe once a month, they had a thousand memories which made them laugh, a hundred inside jokes, and a dozen favorite things to go to or do in the evenings when they spent time together. Garrus remained happily married to Nyreen, Liara was still the Shadow Broker, James and Myra were celebrating their 30th wedding anniversary with their own brood of six children, most of them married and some of them with kids of their own. Myra had finally gotten over her embarrassment and corresponded with Tali routinely bragging about her grandchildren which Tali promptly retaliated with stories of her own. They had not heard of anything from Javik since Liara and he had left to find more Prothean ruins, something which was a bit easier now since Javik, thanks to the memory shard, was able to remember all sorts of places which were as of yet unknown. The pain and the horror of the shard was still there, but Javik now had a mission, to save his people from extinction, and the pain was something a soldier learned to endure for the success of the mission. Steven Cortez was dead, he had become infected with a rare blood ailment which he had gotten from one of several lovers. Samantha Traynor was teaching at Oxford. EDI had moved to Rannoch and was spending her time with the Geth of whom she was most familiar with. Miranda had gotten into politics and was now a serious political player in the Citadel, and as far as John and Tali were concerned, it was only a matter of time before she would be given the human seat on the council. Jacob and his wife and children had ended up on Horizon and had gotten to know Andrew and Alice. Wrex and his chief General Grunt were still bashing heads with the Council over colonization rights but as John noticed, now that the Krogan were able to reproduce as they wanted to, they were not, as had been the fear, overpopulating the galaxy. They were just being aggressive Krogan. And Garrus of course knew just how to handle them. The joke was that the Council never did realize that dozens of Krogan concessions were acquired by buying Wrex some really neat drinks at one of the numerous bars on the Citadel or delivering some favorite finger foods to his wife. Orianna never did find a guy which Miranda approved of, she ended up a Lay Sister of Charity and worked in the poorer sections of the wards for the rest of her life in a medical clinic. Jack remained single her whole life as well. Eventually she was known as Jacqueline, she let her hair grow out, and over time her ink faded as it is wont to do.

"It's kind of hard to keep it up when your breasts are hanging down to your navel and your tush is on the level of the back of your knees?" she explained.

"Tell me about it," answered Tali. "But don't ask Yahn about it. He's always refused to comment on my hips and I don't want him starting now."

Samara remained a Justicar and being she was Asari, no one saw her change that much. And as for Kasumi? She finally retired from theft because she was getting too old and faking your death on a routine basis is exhausting when you're past your thirties. She found a nice estate to forge the deed to and lived for a few quiet years as the owner of a plantation. She would visit Tali on occasion and the two would talk about ordinary things. Then, after her first heart attack, she suffered an acute case of religious scruples, sold everything she had, gave it to the poor, and joined a cloistered order of Carmelite Nuns. She died six years later a happy old Japanese woman.

On Christmas Eve, in that year 2221, John and Tali sat on the couch and looked at the old, still working, holographic Christmas tree they had gotten for the Apartment long long ago. Alice had just sent them her Christmas letter, talking about the two children they had adopted, named Peter and Tali. Leo sent his very sophisticated and well crafted album of his last year of life with Fecicia who remained looking young and Asari. And Karo would be coming over the next day with his family, his oldest now a young adult.

"Do you ever regret the fact that we just were ordinary people our whole lives after we finished with the wars?" he asked her.

"Why would I Yahn?" she replied. "I was with you. And what was really nice about being here with you on Rannoch has been the fact that it's been years since I worried about you being killed. Have you forgotten those moments of terror we had? Have you forgotten that I was so scared of losing you in London that I was nearly in tears."

"Yeah," replied John. "You said, 'I want more time'."

"I got it," sighed Tali. "But you know? It's still not enough."

"I don't think it ever will be in this life," replied John. "I'm just glad that you are still here with me."

Two months later, the rainy season began and Tali started to cough. It was small brief spasms at first, but during a dinner with Kal and his bond-mate a few weeks into the rainy season, Kal took John aside after the girls had retired to the woman's restroom.

"Get Tali to a doctor now Yohn," he said. "And I do mean now."

It was two days later that they did get to a doctor, and after three hours of tests, the doctor sat them down and told them the news. It was a problem with those Quarians who had been born and raised on the Migrant Fleet. It didn't happen to all of them, but it was common enough. There was a point in which the body simply lacked all the resources to completely adapt to Rannoch. In short, Tali was starting to die from an allergic reaction to various strains of pollen she had failed to completely adapt to. They sought another opinion. And got the same news. And then they went to a third doctor and were once again told that Tali was dying.

There were consultations with Priests, some extra Masses, some extra prayers, and then the fights began again. John didn't care enough, Tali was making too many demands, and there was a period of three weeks in which life in the Shepherd house hold was rough and hard and tense. Karo and Serie tried to help as much as they could, but Tali was hard to deal with and John got tired of having to fight it out with her.

And then there was the thirty six hour period in which Tali just up and cried and John routinely joined her, shedding a few tears himself while he held her. Then, as the lights of the houses which had sprung up around them began to light, and Tikkun was setting in the west through their wide living room picture window, they looked at the Kala Tree which Tali had once upon a time climbed and trilled to John in, the one Kiwi was buried under.

"I've been so selfish," sighed Tali. "I'm going to die soon and I've been doing nothing but make you miserable by feeling sorry for myself these last few weeks."

"It's okay," said John. "It really is. I haven't been happy either. I'm about to say goodbye to the woman I've loved almost all my life."

And so from then on, they spent as much time as they could next to each other. Serie came over in the mornings to watch over Tali while John drove to the Academy and taught, working to get some time off so he might spend it with Tali. It was three weeks later that Tali was no longer strong enough to walk on her own. She was in a wheel chair and John would take her out and they would walk and stroll across the land around their home. They were in a neighborhood now, there were homes all over the place and between them were well worn and gardened pathways for walking. There were Geth employed by the city of Aviva to keep sections gardened so when the rains came, there were flowers in abundance. It was still the rainy season, but when the clouds had broken, John would take Tali on these strolls. He let the smells waft across his nose, and would smell them on Tali. It was the last time he would get to do this he realized. Soon he would lose her. But the most poignant moment was when they ran into another couple with a wheel chair. It was the Quarian man in the chair, and his wife was pushing him. Tali reached for the woman.

"You poor dear," she said.

"We've been bonded since we landed," the woman said beginning to cry. "We waited until we were on Rannoch to do it because it was so special. And now I'm about to lose him."

John just looked at the old Quarian gentleman in the wheel chair. He was coughing a bit, and catching the detritus with his mouth cloth. For a brief moment, John was jealous.

It was 23 days later. There was a gentle rain falling outside. The smell of the pollens in Tali's hair reminded John of jasmine and rose, subtly mixed. She was coughing, and he was holding a mouth cloth over her. There was a rattle to the cough that John did not like hearing. But then Tali was able to catch her breath and she looked up at him. Her eyes were sparkling faintly. She reached with her right arm and her two fingers gently gripped his shoulder.

"Kiss me Yahn," she whispered.

And he did. He held her close and looked into her eyes, watching the little flashes in the eyes. They just looked at each other for a moment.

"I will always love you," he said.

"And I you, Yahn," she replied. Her voice was rough and gravely, no longer the soft alto, but he didn't care, for this was the woman he had lived his whole life with. There was the face, that he had always valued, because for so long it had been denied him. There were those eyes, which he only saw the glow of behind her visor all those years ago, and there was her soft black dull hair, once shimmering blue but now still as soft as the day he first remembered it. He knew he was about to lose her, and he did not want to let her go.

Then she seemed to look past him.

"Kiwi?" she asked.

"Kiwi has left us," sobbed John, thinking she was sliding into dementia.

Tali exhaled once. Her fingers fell off his shoulder. She was no longer among the living.

John held her for another moment, once again smelling the scents of her hair. But it was no longer the same, so he gently put the body in a restful pose on the couch they had been seated upon, and he called the coroner and Priest. Shortly there after Karo and Serie came and the preparations for the funeral began. No one among their friends would be able to make it in time, but consolation letters came, the longest being from Garrus who talked sadly and wistfully about all the memories he had shared with them.

The funeral was a large one, for the Quarian press were there covering the death of the great heroine of the people, who had led them back to Rannoch. Speeches were made, and memorials were promised, and John hated every moment of it. He was so glad when they were finally able to reach the internment which was private. Tali would be buried next to Kiwi. Her tombstone listed her name, her life and one little epitaph which John wrote for it.

"Here lies Tali, my delight,  
Who had eyes so shining bright.  
She had gone now for to dance,  
In the realms of holy light."

And after it was all over with, and the house was cleared of guests who had come to offer consolations, John retired to the bed room, threw himself down on the bed, and cried great wracking sobs of grief. It was an hour and a half before he was able to recover sufficiently. And then he had a horrifying terror that there would be nothing left of her in the house now that she was buried. He dashed into the shower, pulled up the drain, and found a clump of old hair which had been caught in the filters. He pulled it out, and soaked it in pot so that it would loosen up. And once it had, with a needle, he gently separated out a dozen of Tali's old hairs which he wrapped up around a wood dowel so they would curl into a loop.

Leo was coming from the Citadel, and so John asked him to set the hairs into a crystal which he could wear as a pendant around his neck. He had never stopped wearing his dog tags, along with a medal of St. Michael, and Leo, understanding, was able to accomplish the job in a matter of a couple of days while he was staying at the house. Fecicia had not come on this trip, she had remained at the shop at the citadel since it was their big sales time. Besides she had argued, funerals are depressing.

"Has anyone ever told you that your wife is still very superficial?" asked John.

"No one has to," answered Leo with a sigh. "I hear it out of her mouth every day."

"You know," continued John. "She might just walk out on you before you die."

"Not likely," replied Leo. His smile was spiced with cosmopolitan cynicism. "She only inherits the millions of credits fortune if she's still living with me the day I die, provided she didn't murder me. And I keep giving her new fashionable yewelry as an aside. She'll hang around because I'm chief person who keeps her beautiful. She loves me, in her own way, yust not as deeply as mom loved you, or Serie loves Karo."

But such is Quarian psychology that the idea of regretting his bonding never entered into the conversation.

Two weeks later, Garrus arrived to console his brother and the two of them got good and roaring drunk before John broke down and cried again. Garrus got him through the next two weeks, but then he was gone and John once again fell into a deep depression. His work began to suffer and he began to lose weight. Karo and Serie were worried but there was nothing they could do that seemed to pull John out of his slump.

The end of the slump came about five weeks after the funeral. John had a dream. He found himself standing at the foot of a hill. It reminded him of Rannoch, but it also reminded him of Earth. And when he looked up, he could see Tali standing at the top of the hill, and she was motioning him up. He tried to climb the hill, but it was hard, for he was old and the hill was steep. But she waited for him. When he reached the top, there she was, looking youthful and healthy, her hair glistening in the sun and her eyes sparkling.

"Look John," she said, pointing beyond the hill. There, on the shoreline of an ocean, was the house that John and Tali had talked about back in the days of their youth. The house they had wanted, on the property they had wanted, but never were able to afford.

"I am building it for us John, and I will wait for you there; me, and Kiwi. So be strong my love, you have one last job to do, and then you can be with us."

And then she and the dream faded.

It wasn't the same, but he finally was able to face the grief, and get through it. He began to realize that the house was very empty now and he was going to go crazy with loneliness. So John called up Karo and offered to let him and his family move in. Their house was still small John argued. His income would help offset the expenses they still had dealing with their rapidly growing up children, and Serie would be a great help around the house keeping Wooster from pulling up the wrong flowers in the garden.

Karo and Serie talked about it for several days before they agreed. John was glad since some of their younger children were still at that playful period of their lives and the thought of staying in grandfather's house was more than thrilling for them. A second master bedroom and bath were built on the house in part with the proceeds of the sale of Karo's house. And so John had his house filled with life again. His grandchildren were playing in the yard, growing up, getting married, and Karo and Serie were there to make the days go by with as little sadness as possible. Every night John would kiss Tali's photo by his bedside, the very same photo that Tali had posed for all those years ago on Rannoch for him, and place it on the pillow next to him, then he would go to sleep.


	42. Chapter 42 - The Last Mission

And the second decade of the twenty third century rolled on by. John got older, and wondered why he was still alive. But there was still teaching to do, there were students to matriculate, and there were starting to be fellow teachers to bury and console their families about. There was a set of interviews about his life with Tali by local historians, and the time seemed to continue. The grandchildren grew up and John found himself a great-grandfather.

And then, after Easter in the year 2234, while John was busy grading some essays on the navel strategies which had been implemented in the recent Batarian Quarian war, there was a ring at the door. John groaned, got his 75 year old legs to propel him to the door, and opened it on something he had long ago given up on ever seeing again.

It was Javik, with a second Prothean standing next to him.

"Commander Shepherd," he said. "I want you to meet my wife, Vikaf."

John looked at the two of them, adjusting his glasses. He could see no real difference between the two save that Vikaf seemed to be a little shorter and bluer than Javik.

"You found survivors then?"

"Yes," said Javik. "Liara followed one of the memories I had from the memory shard, a place which seems to have been one of the last refuges from the Reaper harvest. There at the bottom, in a small room, were 15 Protheans in stases, 8 females and 7 males. They had been an archeological team who had been assigned to tracking down all the secrets of the Inusannon in the hopes of finding some plan to defeat the Reapers. When they realized that the battle was lost, they designed a crypt which would hold them until another team of archeologists would find them and revive them."

"So they knew what they would have to do to make it last," mused John.

"Indeed," replied Javik. "When Liara and I reached the room, the VI promptly brought them out of stases. We didn't have to figure out how to operate the machinery at all."

"8 females and 7 males," mused John. "Seems rather convenient doesn't it? Almost as if someone knew it would be a male Prothean who found them."

"It was a 50/50 chance," snapped Javik. Then he chuckled. "But I am not here to fight with you over what deity rules the universe."

"So how many children?" asked John.

"Twenty-nine," replied Javik proudly. "The Protheans are beginning to grow. Indeed, I am able to shout once more into the face of the Reapers. For we have proclaimed that they failed to fully harvest us. But that is not why I am here."

"So why are you here?" asked John. "And you could have let me know in advance and I would have had a nicer reception for you. As it is you're going to have to sit on a couch that Wooster has not yet cleaned for the week."

Javik seemed to smile. "Garrus joked that you had gone native. Humans don't worry that their couch has not been cleaned in a week. No commander, I am not here as a social call. I am here to extend an invitation which I think you will accept."

"An invitation?"

"To once again face the Reapers, for they have returned."

John thought he ought to be surprised. But he wasn't. The galaxy was a very big place. Everyone knew that the Reapers had been fleeing for ten minutes before the Crucible had fired. No one knew how many of them existed. It was more than likely that some of them were either able to slip out of the range of the Crucible's firing, or had never been in range in the first place, out in deep space somewhere, repairing themselves, coordinating other attacks. Likewise, the time since was not a surprise either. A sudden catastrophic slaughter like that would have shaken them to their very foundation, a very large screaming denial of their divinity. How long did it take for them to find each other out there and then huddle together dealing with the terror of the shock. How long did they think and discuss among themselves what had gone wrong. And how long had it been before their ancient arrogance had once again taken control? But what worried him most was this. How much stupid in them had been cured by that catastrophic defeat?

John just looked at him for a second. "Come in," he said. "And I'll see where I stored my battle armor." He turned and started to creak towards the bedroom.

"Commander, I am not here to ask you to fight. You are too old for that. As am I. You no doubt know the races are starting to fall apart. And the Reapers took advantage of that. They harvested an entire Turian Colony, just fifteen years settled."

"Harvested? Entirely?"

"Completely. They did it in a matter of a week, long enough to destroy the colony before sufficient forces could be brought against them."

"But forces were brought?"

"Of course, but the Reapers fell back into deep space. They have rethought their strategy it seems. It was a hit and run raid, and very successful."

"What then am I to do?"

"Liara is getting me, Garrus, and you to rally the races for a new defense against the threat. For if the Reapers continue these hit and run raids, with successful harvests, eventually they will get back their numbers, and what do you think they will do if they are wiser than last time?"

"They will attack the Citadel and destroy it, thus rendering our ability to use the Crucible impossible. For they can rebuild the Citadel after the harvest is finished."

Javik nodded. "Liara is convinced that if the remnants of the Team that led the galaxy to victory over the Reapers gather and speak out, we will rally the galaxy to come up with a sensible defensive plan which will enable us to fight off the Reapers long enough to be able to defeat them."

John nodded. "You are right that I will take the invitation. Come in Javik and Vikaf, there are things I will need to do before I can go. You don't mind staying a few days?"

Javik nodded. "Liara seemed of the opinion that you would have to set your house in order before you came. So we came with the understanding that we would be spending time on Rannoch while you prepared."

John was already working his omni-tool, contacting the family lawyer. "How do you like Rannoch so far?"

"It is filled with energy," answered Vikaf. "The scents are sweet and express much hope. It is a happy land that we are in."

"Yes," said John silently. He looked out the living room picture window. Across the wadi was the skyline of Aviva, he could see the line of sky-cars on the air pathway busy at their own business. Gone were the days when the land had been open to the horizon. In the next home was a young mother with her two children, showing them the rocks in their garden. The eldest was hopping about in that Quarian fashion, excited about something. Most of the Quarians who had lived on the Migrant Fleet were gone now, only Kal remained among Tali's friends and fellow Admirals who was still alive. But the population was young, energetic, and filled with new ideas. Already the Migrant Fleet for them was something once upon a time that the old folks argued was what the young folk needed to experience in order to get some maturity. Serie walked in, her bounce reminding John of Tali's bounce, she paused to check some music on the piano, rearranged it, smiled at him, and walked on through towards the garage where the sky-cars were kept. It was obvious she had an errand to run.

Suddenly John realized that this was goodbye.

Over the next three days there was work to be done. John could not fit into his battle armor, and realized it would not be needed anyway. So he donated it to the historical museum, after pointing out the engineering that Tali had performed upon it which was in part responsible for his making the beam to the Citadel. Then he rechecked his will, had a long conversation with Leo so that Leo would understand that the house and property would be going to Karo and his family, who were the poorest, while some of Alice's favorite things as a child would go to her, but Leo was to come and claim those items which had been his from memories. Leo understood, but suggested that he get the items prior to John's passing because Fecicia would get irate if she thought John had 'snubbed' her in the will.

While the legal work on the will was not as demanding as a human procedure, it was more sophisticated than it had been in John and Tali's youth. Karo began to pick up on the what things were suggesting, being the poet of the family, and on the evening of the second day, after dinner, he took John aside.

"Dad? Do you really think you won't be coming back alive from this?" he asked.

"I don't know Karo," replied John. "I only know that this is the last job. I might come home to die, I might die on the way home, I might even be killed by the Reapers. If they know I'm about, they will come for me if they think they can get away with it."

"What kind of war is this going to be dad?" he asked. "Do I need to learn how to use a gun? Is my family in danger?"

"I don't know Karo," John said, looking out the window for a moment at the bright lights of the city. He remembered their summer in Illium for a brief instant. "All I know is that they won't stop. I don't think they will attack Rannoch. Rannoch is too big and the Quarian Navy is always in orbit around it. Likewise the Geth in their Dyson Sphere are always on alert. They won't come to this system until they have sufficient forces to be able to bring themselves to bear full force, and it looks like we killed almost all of them when we fired the Crucible. The new colonies are in the most peril. But Rannoch I think, will be safe."

"Gonna miss you Dad," sighed Karo. "You've been there for me all my life, watching over me, my wife says she always feels safe in the house when you are around."

"You'll do fine," assured John. "You are poetry in the Shepherd house hold, and poetry always can write a happy ending."

Four days after Javik and his mate arrived, the three of them got into the sky-car that Javik had rented and sailed for the spaceport docks. John had resigned his position, after grading the last of his papers, and the Academy had thrown a little farewell party at the last moment which totally forget John was levo. So he got to watch everyone else eat the cake. And then he stepped on a brand new Quarian liner specifically secured for the tour of planets which Liara had planned. John had his own room, com-links, and as a final tribute to his glory days, Liara had a few surprises as well. There was a shelf where a couple of John's old ship models had been secured from the old Normandy. One of them, the first Normandy, which still had Tali's old engine put on it. John didn't know how to make it fly, but somehow, it was nice. And there was an aquarium in the room, with a few of the types of fish John had kept once upon a time.

But it was a single bed, and not a double bed, and that gave John a brief moment of grief. But he still had Tali's old picture, the one with her smiling in front of the sun, and he put it by the bed, after looking at it, and remembering. There was a grand window which he could look out.

"Good afternoon Commander," came EDI's voice over the com.

"EDI?" gasped John.

"Indeed Commander, Liara informed me of the mission and I believe the appropriate comment would be along the lines of 'I would not miss this for the world.' Or perhaps I should say that wild horses couldn't drag me away.

"It will be good to hear your voice again EDI."

"And yours too. I imagine your grief for Tali has returned?"

"A little, how about you and Jeff?"

"I miss him. More so now than I did yesterday, but more yesterday while I was preparing to transfer myself to the new ship than I did prior. For it has been longer since he has died than you have had to endure. The new pilot does not get my jokes."

"EDI? I have a confession to make, it was very hard to get your jokes."

"But once I told you, you comprehended them. The new pilot just looks at me."

"Well save the jokes for when we're all together."

Garrus was met next. He was old and creaky as well. His old battle scars had faded, but he had gotten to bring Nyreen with him on the trip as his support. The two old friends spent a lot of time remembering and catching up as the ship proceeded towards the Mass Relay. Liara was there, still looking as young and bright as she ever had. Her three daughters were with her as well, the first was named Garia, whom she had had with Garrus. The second was Javelle, whom she had had with Javik. Last was Feria, whom she had had with Feron. They were obviously young, teens in behavior though Garia had enough maturity that she was able to help with minor administrative tasks.

"I don't have one named Johanna," she observed. And gave John a look which suggested 'yet'.

John decided to not touch that one.

And then he ran into the woman in charge of the coordination of the tour. She was a bit shorter than John, elderly, chubby, of Indian descent, and even her hair was wrinkled, as well as grey.

"Commander Shepherd?" she asked. "Do you remember me?"

It took John a second.

"Myra?"

"Yes, I guess we're working together again."

"Liara's idea?"

"It was. Since James has died, my house has been pretty empty. I need something to do and we've both grown up a bit I suspect."

"I know the feeling," sighed John. "Welcome aboard for the last ride."

"It's the same and yet not the same," observed Myra. "It's not the Normandy, and we won't be fighting. Which is good, I don't think I would have taken this assignment if I thought I was going to get shot."

"You signed on with Commander Shepherd and thought you were not going to get shot?" joked John.

A sudden look of horror went across Myra's face.

"You can't be serious," she stammered.

"We're not planning on getting shot any time soon Myra, but then again, when you first met us at that Sushi place, we were not planning on getting shot that night either, but still, it happened."

When dark skinned people blush, it's a very curious color. But even so Myra quickly recovered. "I supposed you are right. It is the Reapers we will be talking about and trying to rally forces for. I guess we have to be ready for anything."

Liara had set up the lounge area on the vessel where drinks could be procured, business could be conducted, discussions could be had, and memories recollected. There were pictures of all of them, both those who were still with them and those that were departed on the walls. The one that made John the most wistful was the one which they had taken on the citadel, during a brief break before Virmire. There he was, young and strong, standing next to Kaiden, who had his arm around Ashley. Garrus was there, looking cool with his Mantis in the crook of his arm. And then there was Wrex, to Wrex's left, was Liara standing there looking serious, but sitting on top of Wrex's hump, was Tali, pretending that she was looking for something far far away.

He was looking at that picture for the first time when Garrus walked up to him and put his arm around John's shoulders.

"Those were the days, my friend," he mused.

"We thought they'd never end," replied John.

There was work to be had, and planning to make. And so as the liner plowed through galactic space, talks were worked out, choreographed, and practiced. Each of the main players had a part to play. Liara would provide the background materials with Javik. John and Garrus spoke of the actual missions, and Myra simply saw to it that everyone was supplied and organized. EDI? Her chief job was to keep the ship running smoothly.

It was an eighteen month tour. During the first six months, the talks were few and poorly attended. But six months into it, the Reapers struck again. A full five capital ships struck a Batarian colony in the Traverse and the Batarians were completely harvested. People started to pay attention. Five months later, another colony, human, was likewise struck, but it was too big to harvest in a few days, rather, one of it's larger cities was wiped off the surface while Reaper troops held off human efforts to liberate the prisoners. And then the next raid was four months after that, striking one of the original Asari colonies which had been rebuilt after the Reaper war. Again it was an entire city which was taken.

So the last two months of the tour were mostly at the Citadel, and now it was no longer necessary for Myra to coordinate sailing times to the new planet where the talks would be had, now it was keeping the team rested and refreshed for the next seminar or discussion on the Citadel. For six weeks, John was speaking and engaging for twelve to sixteen hours a day. It was exhausting for him, for he was now almost 77 years old. But in the end, he was successful. It became increasingly obvious that the races could not afford to fight each other because of the presence of the Reapers. While they were no longer an overwhelming threat, they constituted a threat which would, if given the chance, become overwhelming in the end. That was going to require persistent vigilance.

The success of the talks did not stem, as Liara had thought they would, on the calls for unity. They did not stem, as Liara thought they would, on the suggestions for coordinated defense. They were successful, because a new generation of leaders saw the Reaper war, through Garrus', Javik's, and John's eyes. They saw the horror. In short, the three veterans scared the hell out of the galaxy's leaders. And that was exactly what was needed.

"It was like it always is," signed John as the ship left the Citadel and began to head back for Rannoch. "Fear and pain are often the only tools which can fix the stupid."

* * *

_At the end of the tour, I took each of the old friends back to their homes. Javik and his wife were the first dropped off, at the Prothean enclave. Today of course, there are two full planets which are entirely Prothean and everyone knows how adept they are as teachers and guides. It is hard to believe that when I was a child, they were only history, and mythological history at that. Then I dropped off Garrus. John and he spent a great deal of time together before they said their final goodbyes. Then it was just him and me._

_For the first week and a half, the trip was to Horizon where John got to see Alice, his daughter, his son-in-law Andrew, their two children, and his newly born great-grandchild. It was a bitter sweet meeting for John, he spoke longest with Alice, whom he had not seen for 24 years. She was a mature Quarian woman, and it was clear that Andrew her husband was just as deeply in love with her as John had been with Tali. And it was that deep love that I was to directly experience, though not in the way I would have wished._

_For during the weeks after we left Palavan, I did everything I could to get that man into bed with me. We Asari often remember those whom we greatly respected and admired in the lives of our daughters, for so many of those whom we respect and admire have brief and flickering lifespans. By having a daughter by them, we preserve a bit of them for our own memories. I was not yet even 200 and here was John Michael Shepherd at the tail end of his life. I was still looking as young and fit as I had the day he and Kaiden had admired me while I was stuck in that Prothean security device, and he was an old weakened man. Part of me was sad for him, but the other part of me was in awe that so much of his personality still came to the fore. But, he would not take me into his arms._

_"I spent too much time with the Quarians," he said, clearly trying to soften the blow. "I just can't imagine making love to anyone save Tali. And at this age, I'm not exactly physically capable anyway."_

_Of course you don't have to be physically capable with an Asari. We're quite capable of making up for the deficiencies in any species we take a liking to. And John knew that quite well. But, as I said, he was trying to soften the blow. It was clear that he had reached such a depth of love for Tali that any other woman simply would not measure up. I was once again very jealous of her, and this in spite of the fact that she had been dead and buried for over ten years._

_So we talked and remembered and when we reached Rannoch, he said goodbye to me in a fashion that suggested I would not see him again either. And it proved prescient. For exactly 24 hours later, I was informed by his son, Karo, that he had indeed passed away._

_I wasn't there for his death, though I got back for the funeral. Garrus and EDI were also able to make it back. There were of course the usual gang of media and self-important politicians who made political capital off his death. But the internment was private, his tombstone was simple. It listed the date of his birth, death and the epitaph was "He gave her more time." And that reminded us of so many things. We got to talk with Karo that evening, and it was at this point that I found out about how he had spent the last few hours of his life._

_He had been driven back to the house and come in, spent the evening with Karo and Serie, once again confirmed all the decisions he had made about his will, and went to bed early. They found him the next morning. Karo was convinced that he had known, for unlike his prior habits, he did not put Tali's picture on the pillow next to him, but left it on the night stand. And likewise, he did not wear his dog tags with his St. Michael's medallion and the crystal which held her hair. He left them at the base of the picture. I was curious and asked Karo if he knew about John's experiences with being dead._

_"Of course," replied Karo. "He told us all about it, especially after Kiwi died. It helped us get through that, but especially Alice who did not understand for a very long time what had happened."_

_Then Karo got up, and walked to the kitchen window, the one which opened up on the side of the house away from the skyline of Aviva. He looked through the window for a moment and said, "Flown to the moon."_

_I never was able to find out what he meant by that._

_Today of course, nearly every one of the team is dead and gone, as is their descendants. Only Grunt and I remain alive of the original teams. Even EDI's body eventually wore out and she uploaded herself into the Geth Dyson Sphere where I presume she remains to this day. The house John and Tali built on Rannoch was torn down and made into a memorial park after the death of Karo and Serie. That lasted a few years before they forgot and a massive apartment block is on the site now. The gravesite of John, Tali, Kiwi, and Karo is part of an outdoor grill for receptions. I did not find out what they did with the coffins, I suspect I would have cried if I had found out, even if they had been moved to the National Cemetery as they were supposed to have done. There is a great monument to all of us at the Citadel. John stands at the front, Tali at his side, Kaiden, Ashley, Wrex, and myself are behind them. Then there is Jack and Kasumi, Miranda and Jacob, Mordin and Grunt. Then Samara and Zaeed. Behind them is James and Steven, Samantha and Javik, then Joker and EDI at the back. They all seem to be looking forward. Tali is in her suit, but her hood is down and her visor off. Her face can be seen, and those who walk by the monument shrug their shoulders not knowing just how special it was for all of us who were able to see that sweet face smiling at us as she slowly acclimated to the Normandy, and then Anderson's apartment on the old Citadel, and finally, her home on Rannoch._

_As I write this final paragraph to this biography, there is news of a Reaper raid. They remain out there, an ever present threat. But gone are the days when we feared their return. The focus now is to find technology which will enable us to meet them head on ship to ship and then eventually find where they are hiding in deep space and take them out. But that is still in the future. But though many have died in the past few centuries from Reaper attacks, the galaxy remains safe on the whole, for not once have the Reapers been able to threaten us like they did back in the days of John Michael Shepherd. We remain united and ever vigilant._

_I would like to imagine that John is still looking down at us from where ever he's gone to. I hope he approves._

_From "The Man Tali Loved"_

* * *

John ran up the marbled path towards the gate. He paused long enough to give a big bear hug to Peter who opened the gate for him, more as courtesy than necessity. Then John ran up the streets of the great celestial city which looked just like it had all those decades prior. There was the French Cafe he had mentioned to Garrus where he hoped to have drinks with Garrus one day. There was the Italian Renaissance Tailor who had been fitting those three Asari maidens, and there was the spot he had met that little Quarian girl who had that billowing blond hair . . . just like Kiwi's.

Then he reached the great Cathedral temple dashed in, and threw himself down at the feet of the all mighty God.

"Thank you!" he cried. "Thank you for the time. Thank you for the joys! Thank you for the pain. Thank you for the life I had."

"Totally worth it?" queried Christ.

"Totally!" ended John standing up. "But if you please, I wish to see Tali and Kiwi."

"In a minute," replied Christ. "You are not dressed for the occasion."

"Dressed?"

"Do you think I'm going to let a knight of mine see his lady love and daughter without his armor and honors? Stand right there."

Then God clapped his hands and out came two young adolescent boys.

"This is Geoffrey, he died defending his lord during the battle of Hattin. Ten moslems fell at his feet before he was overcome but such was his spirited defense that the moslems did not despoil the body of his lord. He is my first page. And that is Anton, who stood at the door of an orphanage for young girls on the outskirts of Vienna and held it to his death against the Ottoman turks so that the girls had time to escape the slavers of the sultan. He is my second page. They will now present to you your armor and arms."

"But Lord?" queried John. "In heaven, is there need of arms and armor?"

"Not at the present," replied God. "But when I receive the measured prayers my justice requires to be able to destroy forever the hosts of evil, your fighting skills will be desired because I would like my friends to help."

And so John stood and was fitted in armor which gleamed and glistened more brightly than polished silver. And on the armor was the entire story of his life, including the names of all the Reapers he had defeated, of which he was surprised to discover, numbered 215,784. Nearly all of them from the firing of the crucible. The two boys were professional in their fitting and asked him many questions about his fights, seeming to enjoy the struggle for the sake of the heroism which had been required. John began to realize that at some level, the pain had been forgotten, and all he could recall was the salient points. Then his armor was on, his pistol at his side.

"Now you are truly ready to meet your beloved and daughter," concluded God who was nodding his head in approval.

"So, it's a pretty big place," suggested John. "Where do they live?"

"You don't remember Kiwi pointing it out to you the first time you were here?"

"Kiwi?! But . . . She didn't tell me. Why didn't she tell me?"

"Because she did not see a man who was her father. She saw a man who reminded her a lot of her father, but that mark on your soul by which she would have recognized you did not yet exist."

"Then Tali was . . ."

"Present as well, but no where near, and again John, she would not have recognized the man who was her bond-mate. She would have looked at you, and told you that you reminded her of her beloved, and the two of them would have gone back home and talked about how much they would be looking forward to your arrival."

"But I would have . . ."

"No, you would not have, because Tali was not your Bond-mate yet. She would have reminded you of Tali, but you would not have recognized her either because the Tali you knew did not yet have that mark."

"So my own daughter came up to me the first time I was here and told me my entire life story and I had no clue."

"Surprised?"

"Yes, Peter said you liked doing that to people."

"I do."

"So they know I've arrived?"

"Why would I do that and miss out on the surprise?"

"You know, in the Galaxy, they think this place is dull," observed John.

"Which I don't take too much time trying to explain because I get even more surprises out of it," replied Christ grinning.

John once again bowed and saluted and marched out of the great hall. He felt now, like he was a real soldier, more soldier than he had ever felt when in the galaxy. He reached the street, looked up, and there it was, right where Kiwi had pointed it out. He wanted to be there and he knew instantly that he was about to be there. But if God had planned a surprise, there was no reason why he couldn't participate in it, and remembering his little dream, he found himself at the foot of that great hill.

The grass was waving and there were butterflies flitting about. They were of earth, yet he recognized birds flying above which were native to Rannoch. And as he climbed the hill, easily now, filled with energy, he noticed more and more that it was as if this place, this planet, this sky, was a mix of both that which he and Tali had seen on Rannoch, and he had remembered from his childhood on Earth. Only the blend was perfect.

And then he reached the crest of the hill, and looked down at the house. It wasn't as if he was looking at a house, by a cliff face, overlooking a great vast ocean. It wasn't as if there was a hill he was standing on. It wasn't as if there was a planet he was upon, or a sky above filled with stars which seemed to be a great galaxy. It was all that, but yet, very small, and very dear. He realized that what he was on wasn't any of those, what he was at and yet in, was home.

He heard the humming of bees, the singing of birds, and looking down the hill at the house he saw a picnic table with a great basket of flowers upon it. There were four people sitting at it, and a child at play among them. It was Tali, his mother, and two other Quarians whom John immediately realized where her parents. And the child was Kiwi, looking just like she had back when he had first met her on the streets of the great celestial city. He realized that for him, as he had noticed back the first time, it was a snap shot, a snap shot of his family, once upon a time, forever preserved.

And it was her father that first noticed him, and pointed to him. Tali looked up, and leapt over the table. She ran towards him, holding out her arms, her long black hair flying behind her, flashing blue in the light. Behind her was Kiwi, leaping and jumping as she came. And then Tali was in his arms, and once again he could feel her fingers wrap around his shoulders and hold on tight. The scent of Jasmine and Rose wafted up from her and before they kissed, he gazed once more into her brilliant white eyes, flashing in the sunlight.

Glimmering Silver

Sparkling Gold

Shining Bright

Ends my story, Shining Bright,  
Hope you found it a respite,  
I will close the lid down tight,  
On this warm and vernal night.


	43. The Author's Notes

The story is ended. And now we get to the author's notes. I decided to put these at the end in their own little section so those of you who don't want to be bothered with them can flip over to your next favorite fan fic and not have to plow through my observations and reasons for writing what I did. Some people find these sorts of things boring, and thanks to modern psychiatric help, I'm okay with that now.

Likewise, if I've in some fashion violated the net policy, it will be easy enough to just dump 'em.

But for those of you curious and wanting to write yourself, you'll find my reasoning and references gist for your own writing down the road. And if you can break into the biz and have fun doing it, I'll be happy to have helped you.

So remember the eternal rule of good writing, "Originality is the art of concealing your source." Grab anything you like from this fic and notes and hide it in your own work. I won't mind, and if you do it right, I won't even notice.

I started writing fan fic before I knew it was fan fic (During the first Neverwinter Nights game on a persistent world which has it's own forum on the Bioware site) but what triggered this particular bit started when my little Asian daughter looked up at me with those big brown almond eyes and said "Dadeee? Can you buy Mass Effect for meeee?" And naturally being a man, father, and the head of my household, I promptly replied, "yes dear". And ran off to do it.

What can I say? She's four foot ten, long black hair that flashes blue in the sunlight, has a soft alto voice, and looks horribly cute (and if you have just noticed similarities with her and my rendition of Tali . . . give yourself an A). I'm utterly spineless with the women in my household. She'll make a guy a very nice wife some day if she doesn't beat him senseless before he asks her.

I finished the trilogy, she still has not. She's now in love with Thorin Oakenshield.

And accordingly I reached that moment when Tali is carried to the Normandy saying "Come back to me." And I said "Damn it! That girl's getting a happy ending!"

Shout out to Liz (Ash) Sroka for her masterwork acting skills there by the way. Any professional actress can say "Come back to me" in a believable manner, but only the best can say it in a way that millions of men are crying in front of their TV consoles and calling themselves Talimancers.

That was the reason. This of course required me to do two things. First, fix lore of the Mass Effect universe, but especially fix the ending of Mass Effect 3, and second, write a believable romance.

Now first of all, Bioware did a great job all around, which is usual for them. But they are children of the age and suffer from it as a consequence. That and computer games have restrictions which often fly in the face of real life. So since I was one of those fellows who wasted his youth studying Archeology, History, Logic, Philosophy, and Religion I suffer from an acute form of mental illness known as 'thinking'. And my career choice since I gave up writing as a profession has only exacerbated the disease.

Bioware made three errors. The first was very much dependent upon the design of the game itself and you can't blame Bioware since they had to make a choice when it came to engineering the game's parameters. But in real life, military commanders don't have two thirds of their resources cooling their heels at the base when they are performing a mission, especially the missions which normally happen in the Mass Effect games, swift and to the point. The most observable case was in the Omega DLC where we are expected to believe that Shepherd would leave his entire team behind to help Aria (and Nyreen) take back Omega. Any highly developed urban area is going to be a bitch to take especially when it's clear from the lore that Petrovsky is no pushover.

The second error was the romance process itself. The problem there was that in the end, you get three adolescent hook ups for your romance. There is no real genuine appreciation of how real people feel about each other after they have began to love each other and then are separated by circumstance. Now newly adolescents (and those who never grow past that point) can say "Bye Bye" with no problem, and do so with disgusting regularity. But those of us who discovered in our late teens or early twenties that breaking up was hell (or have since had that charming misfortune known as a divorce), this flies in the face of human experience. No more is this patently obvious in the case of Tali and Shepherd between games 2 and 3. There is no 'oooh baby let's fall into bed' which you can somewhat accept between all the other romances. Here you have two people who can't just do that. Tali will die if she just jumps into bed with Shepherd. A real relationship has to develop in that time because a real world woman is not going to go through all that work just for a one night stand. Likewise, Shepherd does not know what Tali looks like until that evening before the Suicide Mission. There had better be a mutual loving of souls when that mask comes off because if she ends up looking like some of the original concept art Bioware was musing about vis a vis the Quarians, there goes any suspension of disbelief.

So when Tali says "Still totally worth it" in the middle of Mass Effect 3, you're not believing her because you have yet to get an E-mail from her saying "I've missed you so much Shepherd. I can't wait until we get back together again. I hate being Admiral etc."

And there is simply no excuse for that. We're talking a few bits of computer space to fit that. So what if Vega's belt buckle doesn't have that pristine shine any more.

Of course when we get to Steve and his husband, you have now sunk to the tawdry. You now have a relationship which is simply porn and how in the blazes is Bioware going to create sympathy for an acceptance of homosexual marriage when every single heterosexual over the age of 26 (presuming they've actually grown up a bit) is going to say "Euuuu"? I remember talking about that letter Shepherd writes to Tali with a friend of mine very much involved in the local Gay/Bi/Lesbian politics and he agreed that I had nailed it.

The ending to Mass Effect 3 is best described by the Romans who had a latin term for the mistake made; Non Sequiter. That is Latin for It does not follow. It is also a form of humor because it takes the form of an absurd leap from a logical progression of thought.

To whit:_ I haven't trusted women since September of '01. We were in Starbucks having a breakfast coffee. She left she said, to go to the bathroom. Six minutes later the Twin Towers were hit by those planes!_

Quite simply if you have been spending hundreds of game hours witnessing how wrong the Reapers are, you don't have three choices which tell you that in fact, the Reapers were right. Like all physical laws, metaphysical laws can not be broken, they can only be violated. In which case the law breaks you. If you violate the law of gravity, you can end up plummeting to a painful death. If you violate the law of logic you can end up with a bazzilion You Tubes telling you what a pack of idiots you were for that ending.

So having to deal with a set of errors Bioware made with the world, I set out to fix them while sticking with the canon as far as I could.

The first problem was the romantic one. There are really only two popular types of romances which are not a form of porn. Regarding porn, a case could be very successfully made that porn is not romance in the least. But if you think Harlequin Romance is in fact romance . . . or the Vagina Monologues is actually art and drama . . . not to be confused with The Lusty Argonian Maid . . . then I need to at least mention it as a possibility.

The first type of romance is the dysfunctional, such as Romeo and Juliet, and Wuthuring Heights. You have what could have been a wonderful love story totally destroyed by the stupidity of one or both of the couple which frequently messes up everyone else around them (Wuthering Heights), or at least forces them to re-evaluate things (Romeo & Juliet).

And then you have the comic of which The Princess Bride is the most successful in recent times. Here you have an enjoyable love story precisely because nothing works right the first time. Circumstances seem to be conspiring to keep the couple apart, a comedy of errors, interference by wrong but well meaning friends and family, etc.

Since the dysfunctional would mean no happy ending for Tali, I had to pick the comic.

The second problem was the ending. I was going to have to come up with an ending which was believable and sensible and did not fly in the face of the canon.

And I did all of this before I ever wrote the first sentence. Because I knew how the romance and the game would end in my Fan Fic, I was able to write from the first sentence with that in mind.

I made one final promise to myself. I was not going to post any chapter of this fan fic on until it was finished. I had already run into numerous unfinished works on this site and I was determined that I would not leave people guessing or wondering. I had been a professional, I knew I could do the job and at least someone would like it. For that reason, leaving people hanging would have been very obnoxious. Hence why you are reading these notes at the end of a 41 chapter story with several hundred thousand words.

But don't credit me, Bioware did most of the work. I merely padded. I doubt I could have written something this extensive on my own. Hey I'm good, but I'm not that good.

And now we get to the chapter notes where I give you explanations for where I got much of my stuff from. In other words, here's all the sources I unashamedly stole from. If you've gotten all you were looking for in the notes, here's the second best place to leave, and thanks to that miracle drug valium, I'm okay with that.

* * *

**Chapter One - A Meeting**

I determined to set the stage as it were, not with the beginning of the game, since it was primarily a romance, but with the immediate events just before Shepherd meets Tali'Zorah. I wanted to let people know from the get go that this was not about the missions or the overall plot of the games, but about two people falling in love.

One of the criticisms of this chapter was that it was 'way too descriptive'. A good case can be made that it was. For me I was doing two things. First, I posted it originally on Spacebattles and did not presume only Mass Effect affectionados would be the one's reading it. Secondly, I wanted to be able to suggest to the readers that Tali and the Quarians had been very carefully thought out by the author and thus I could from hence forth have Tali do any number of particular things with the readers understanding why for example, she could violently elbow someone who walked up from behind and hugged her (she didn't hear you coming) or why her hair smelled like jasmine and cinnamon come the rainy season. The eyes in particular struck me when I realized, driving down the road after one winter's snow, that the surface would sparkle as the light reflected off the protein rods, hence the title, Shining Bright. This in particular also became important to me because I kept thinking of Tali as a creature from fairyland given that Quarians reminded me of the ancient greek fawns and nymphs. The eyes suggest a little magic about her.

Finally of course, I have a bit of fun with Ashley, playing with that curious quality of women who develop rivalries with other women simply because the other woman is present. We'll see this start to play out in the next chapter.

**Chapter Two - N7 Drill**

Readers seemed to like this chapter in part I suspect because suddenly Tali doesn't like Shepherd any more. Likewise we have a sudden shift in Shepherd's personality which is rather jarring, yet perfectly consistent with his character. We have our first comic obstacle. Of course there is nothing funny about it, it's an absolutely essential element in the story. If these characters are not at the top of military training and form, the very low rate of casualties is going to be rather hard to accept. Likewise this is a little jab the naivety of Bioware thinking that a well trained solider is just going to accept this pack of misfits who are showing up and joining him.

(Archeologist . . . In a gun fight with commandos . . . Winning . . . Riiiiiiiight)

There is going to be nothing funny about the Reapers either. So this chapter helps remind the readers that it's not all going to be beer and skittles.

But likewise we are given hints that there is going to be 'something about Tali' which is going to attract everyone around her.

**Chapter Three - First Mission**

Okay, I will confess, the hack of the Geth Armature is simply a violation of Bioware lore and I did it anyway because I thought it was funny to run through a set of famous robots over the past 50 years of media and literature and then throw, as a curve ball, a reference to The Princess Bride at the end of it.

But likewise, in this chapter, we have John beginning to fall in love with Tali, though at the time he does not realize it. This denseness of John is rather typical of young men of any day and age and it will prove to be a running gag over the next few chapters.

Music always was an important part of my life growing up. It plays a role in a lot of my characters, and Shepherd needs to have a fondness for the piano if he's going to compose a love song to the tune of the Fleet and Flotilla love theme. His shyness at playing when the story begins will be a means by which I can mature and develop him over the story line.

The lyrics come from a collection of folk songs from the 18th and 19th centuries. Folk songs are an excellent lyric to put in any story because they are timeless by nature and thus readers can link up with them. A lot of love song music simply is so passing and artificial, it does nothing save reveal the age of the author.

Finally, you don't have to worry about copyright with folk music.

**Chapter Four - Snowfall**

I was debating if I should name this chapter Jingle Bells, but I suspected people would confuse it with the next chapter so I picked Snowfall. Tali now begins to realize she has feelings for John. But she does not fully reject the possibility until the end of the chapter. In the meantime, I start maturing Ashley in this chapter, setting her up for the romance between her and Kaiden, and likewise setting up Kaiden as the tragic figure he will become in the story line. I always saw Kaiden as a 'gentle soul' and that was one of the reasons why he's the guy with the guitar.

But likewise, we have new comic obstacles in the John/Tali romance. Both have disqualified themselves from the other even though everyone around them is beginning to see the chemistry between them.

Chapter Four is also one of those chapters which required an extensive rewrite after publication when I realized that it seemed as if Tali had 'just fallen in love' with John and yet the whole crew knows? That required a bit of tweaking between Spacebattles and Fanfic.

**Chapter Five - First and Last Christmas**

Christmas was going to be a time benchmark in the story, a reminder that time was passing as the story progressed. Likewise this is where Tali tools John's armor which will be directly responsible for saving John's life during the dash for the Conduit beam in London. This is why you want to block out as much of the story in your head before you start to write because you can have that soft gentle recollection in the midst of the pain of Chapter 38.

The 'hunt' for his armor proves to be the main theme of the chapter along with Tali's increasingly dangerous bi-polar emotions regarding her desire for John coupled with her fear of rejection which paralyzes her. While I did not deliberately link the death of Ashley at Virmire shortly after this chapter with Tali's indecision, I did want readers to wonder if I was suggesting it could have contributed.

John's misunderstanding of Tali's pop song (which was borrowed from a You Tube pop song about Mass Effect 2 and the rivalry between Ashley and Tali and adjusted to fit the story) coupled with Kaiden and Ashley's suddenly blooming romance gives John yet another means to completely miss the hints Tali is dropping.

One of the amusing moments in the posting of this was the strong criticism of a reviewer regarding my suggestion that there were a few folk out there who would go nutso if someone actually suggested Christmas was a Christian holiday. "if they so much as said 'merry'"

What made it amusing of course is as the story goes on and it becomes clear that I'm going to give a sympathetic treatment of Christianity, even making it a crucial part of Shepherd's psyche and motivation, more and more readers screamed that I had ruined the story and given the emotions expressed, seemed to suggest I had ruined their lives as well. So I stood vindicated in my sarcasm. Yes there really are people out there who will shoot the place up if you so much as say "Merry".

That's the danger young readers must recognize. Old fogies like me have a lot of life experience to draw from and our sarcasm is based on that.

Finally however, I got to play around with the issue of four aliens on a human ship who are completely clueless as to what Christmas is. And accordingly you have Tali and Garrus gasping in horror as the Christmas turkey is brought out. I'll be milking this joke again as the story progresses.

**Chapter Six - Anything Could Happen**

There is only so much stupid people can go through before they slam into each other's arms. I had originally planned to have Tali and John not fall in love 'officially' until the appropriate moment in Mass Effect 2. But having set things up like I did, Tali proved to have a mind of her own and the next thing I knew she was hinting her love for John in the discussion and stating it plainly at the appropriate time when the LI in Mass Effect 1 embraces the hero.

When you start developing characters, be prepared for this. They will do this sort of thing on you and there's nothing you can do but roll with the punches.

Even so, this little scene will prove to be memorable to John for when things look like they are going to hell, he will remember the first time he thought the world was going to hell and it was at that point that the most wonderful woman in the world said to him, "I love you" for the first time. It will serve to get him through some very dark times during Mass Effect 3.

This chapter is the first chapter where we have John starting to hash things out with his rapidly becoming close friends as he's struggling to understand indoctrination. I was likewise having trouble coming up with a sensible explanation for it as well which would keep with the lore yet make it something I could handle in the story thus making the behavior of The Illusive Man sensible in Mass Effect 3. They don't get it. Neither did I, but I understood it better as I continued to write and think about it. I left this stumbling in the dark deliberately since it accurately reflects the fact that humans are fallible and we don't always figure it out right at first. Dorothy Sayers in her Lord Peter Whimsey detective stories did this trick routinely. You are just as in the dark as the detective and you can sympathize with him.

Accordingly John messes up his terms. One reviewer argued that I didn't know what I was talking about vis a vis the Gnostics. Neither did they it turned out but I didn't tell them that, I simply observed that it wasn't my mistake, but Shepherd's. Shepherd didn't get the right definition of Lust either. He was close, but not precise. He was describing a series of immoral desires known as Coveting and Envy as well as Lust.

When the hero makes mistakes, they become more human.

**Chapter Seven - Promise Me**

One reviewer did not like the stereotypes I tossed about in the early chapters which culminates with the human treachery stereotype which sets the stage for the 'flown to the moon' imagery which will mark death through out the story line. He did not like 'the world of hats'. It's a fair critique and he has a very valid point.

But for me it was an important part of the story since, thanks to the fanon of Quarians and their deep bonding with their loves which I borrowed from a dozen other fan fic writers, it simply stands to reason that the high level of relationship break ups which mark modern human love is going to terrify a Quarian who's own experience is one of deep and lasting monogamy.

Tali's test is based upon her response to John's fairy tale, which I made up on the spot for the story. But the plot is a common one throughout European myth and fairy tales. 'Do not do this or we are over with' and the hero does it and lives with the regret until he dies. The test was also a common phenomena which American women of the early 20th century would employ to see if the guy who was courting them would be true. Divorce had climbed up to an epidemic 8% by 1930, thanks to the liberalization of divorce laws, and American women were rightly concerned since up until that point, you took for granted that only easily spotted losers would be cheaters and most women had not had to worry about being left with the kids before.

So even though Tali is deeply in love with John at this point, she's going to test him to make sure. And because he passes (by the skin of this teeth) she realizes she can trust him completely and thus her bonding to him becomes deeper, a depth which will keep her loving him sufficiently so that when he comes back after his death, it's not a stretch to have her quickly return to that attraction and desire for him which she experiences at this juncture.

Another point of the stereotypes is the beginnings of another theme I put in the story, that of bigotry. I start by reminding people that it's a universal vice but more importantly it is not a harmless vice, but one which can bring about catastrophic evil if left unchecked. It will be the foundational bigotry of the Reapers which brings about great conflict of the games, but likewise, is also the first nail in the coffin of the three choice disaster for the first and third choice presume that the bigotry of the Reapers is in fact, justified.

It's also where I move the Tali "Spiders!" scene from Mass Effect 3. There were things about Mass Effect 3 I knew I would not be writing about and accordingly the scene works just as well here. I made myself a promise to stick to one Spider Joke for each game. I did not quite keep that as there are four Spider jokes, but the last one is after Mass Effect 3 so it wasn't that bad a violation.

Chapter Seven is also the end of Mass Effect 1 and I presumed originally a book of 21 chapters, seven for each of the games. That is not how it turned out as you can see. But as the characters developed, more events presented themselves which begged to be written about.

**Chapter Eight - Flown to the Moon**

Back in the late 1960's and early 70's a professor by the name of Campbell wrote a book titled "The Hero of a 1,000 Faces" which was a scholastic study of human myth and folk lore where he discusses the perennial hero plot. In that plot line, the hero either enters into the world of the dead or something which symbolizes that grave. One of his friends, a young Hollywood producer, was so impressed with the storyline that he pounded out a little screen play titled Star Wars. From that point on, the picture of Luke Skywalker would be one of the montage of hero portraits on that book by Campbell. As well he should, for what you know as Star Wars Episode IV follows that plot line perfectly.

Being intimately familiar with folk and myth lore (my library collection has over 2,000 folk tales) it was pretty much known from the get go that Shepherd would, in my fan fic, undertake that 'descent into the underworld'. And here's where things got dicey for some of the readers.

Going to Hades is not exactly the sort of thing folks today identify with since no one has believed in the Greco-Roman Pantheon for close to 1,500 years. So I proceeded to update the imagery. I put Shepherd into heaven, used today's understanding of the dying and death process to introduce the reader to that heaven, and then did something else I've never done before in my writing. I made Jesus Christ a character in it. Given that 33% of the world's population is at this point Christian, or raised with a sympathetic understanding of it's precepts, I figured _someone_ would like it.

But based on some of the reviews? You would have thought I was torturing puppies with dull butter knives and arsenic laced chew toys on You Tube. And filming their dying gasps in slow-mo.

And this _after_ I made it clear that the only reason why Shepherd was perceiving God as Christ was because that was his understanding. Peter explains that the Asari perceived God as The Goddess, and then Shepherd encounters his future daughter who speaks of God as Rannoch. This idea I got from a movie titled Eric The Viking in which the Christian Monk, based on his understanding of the supernatural, remains completely immune to the Norse Mythos which threatens to destroy the gang of Vikings led by Eric in the movie. It is why that comic figure in fact, ends up saving them when Odin decides to throw the entire lot into Hel.

Now while I knew Shepherd and Tali would have four adopted children and that the first would die while still a child before I ever wrote the story, Kiwi's arrival in chapter eight to give John his future life's story was entirely unanticipated. But since John did not recognize her as his daughter (nor she him since it had not happened yet to John) the reader is left entirely in the dark until the very end of the story. But it does give me yet another image to employ in my exploration of time verses eternity as concepts.

But the real point of the chapter is John's choice to return, something which is found in ancient Celtic literature, the concept of the Hero Feat. The great sacrifice which the hero performs to bring harmony to the world.

Even one of the reviewers who hated the arrival of Christ admitted that this choice by John was a powerful moment. So I consider the chapter successful in it's intent.

**Chapter Nine - Go Away Ghost**

It took me weeks to figure out why Tali was screaming "Not Yahn Not Yahn Not Yahn" in this chapter. I didn't know if she was trying to say "You're not Yahn" or something else. Eventually I realized that she was in fact, reliving her memory of discovering that John had in fact, died in the attack on the Normandy. But she had to explain it to John before I understood it. But characters do that to you. In addition, we start seeing John's internal thoughts as he begins what will be another persistent theme in the story, the mental fencing with The Illusive Man.

But there's another theme which is going to present itself, the logical consequence of John's experience with death. He now knows his fate. He knows without any doubt what is in store at the end of life and accordingly begins to operate in accord with that. It is a theme which more than a few fantasy authors have played with in recent literature. It also gave me the opportunity to have a few moments of irony when Javik began to present the classic atheist arguments later in the story. I got the idea of Javik being an atheist and arguing from the atheist perspective from yet another fan fic author on this sight. Though in that fan fic, Javik is not an atheist.

There was a brief and hostile response to my casual mention of the African American 'genophage' which is a dark moment in American history which three reviewers were unaware happened. I found that odd since it's not that hard a bit of American history to google out. But likewise, it fit with the theme of bigotry.

Finally, I am able to allude to yet another often overlooked methodology in science, the testimony of eye-witnesses in the exchange between Tali and John's mother Hannah. This is where a lot of information we have about the universe comes from and likewise, why most of us believe that information. In a lot of my hostile reviews by young atheists, I noted they were overlooking this crucial element in their disputations. It is of course why John's experience with heaven and God is hard and fast and not to be disputed. He knows what he experienced. He knows his fate. One reader did, in fact, on Spacebattles, thank me for that.

**Chapter Ten - A Gentle Face**

We have Tali's nervousness about showing her face to John, her desire to do so even though she is terrified and immediately concludes that he thinks she's ugly. This is rather a constant with young girls. While not all of them suffer from this fear, many of them do, because so many girls keep looking at other girls who are popular and concluding that it's because of some bodily attribute. Tali will slide into this insecurity again later.

My solution to Tali's insecurity is pretty standard. In fact it's the theme in a contemporary pop song. Everyone is beautiful to someone, and that is the only person you need to be concerned about. Seriously, my wife is somewhat aware that I think she's beautiful, but I don't think it's ever dawned on her that today, in her fifties, I think she is prettier than I thought she was when she was in her 20's. She was attractive then, I have the pictures to prove it, but after nearly thirty years, her soul behind her eyes is way more present and obvious and for that reason, I have a harder time keeping my hands of her today, than I ever did when she was 25.

I also introduce another element in this chapter, that of the "Happy Noise". When I started to describe Quarians, I took advantage of the fact that I live in the country side and have dozens of animal species bouncing around to observe. And since Tali is an alien species, I kept designing little bits of her physiology to surprise Shepherd with. I hint a little of this in the nicknames John gives Tali, but I borrowed from the over a dozen animal species native to this area (with the exception of monkeys) when I worked out the Quarians. Happy Noise is my tribute to the cats my girls love to raise.

**Chapter Eleven - Acclimating Pianos**

And now having dealt with Tali's insecurities, we address Shepherd's insecurities. Shepherd is a perfectionist and hates having people listen to him learn how to play the piano. I'm rather proud of the line that Tali says summing up the problem. "If my living here is going to stop you living here . . ."

I was able to write this little section thanks to all the piano lessons my mother made me take when I was a child.

Another bit of fun was another feminine trait, the fact that if one girl has a great body and is fond of flaunting it, other girls will get hostile. And one of the reasons of course is the fact that an attractive female body exerts a pull on a guy's eyes and women notice that drift. So if you are the sort of girl who likes going around in tank tops and tight shorts and other girls you barely know are letting you experience raw hatred from them, chances are you are distracting their boyfriend.

So think about what you are going to wear at the next party, that 125 dollar hair style you save just might be your own.

**Chapter Twelve - I'm the Ugly Duckling**

History is filled with a fascinating phenomena almost entirely absent from Hollywood, that of the ugly guy getting the beautiful woman for a mate. Or the exact opposite. John is not ugly in the story, but since he is not Quarian, Tali does not find him particularly attractive at first. I got the basic idea from Gulliver's Travels. Gulliver visits a race of giants and finds them horribly ugly because he is looking at huge noses and mouths etc. Tali finds John ugly because she can see his face in a high resolution detail. It's his personality and care for her which wins her heart in the end. And over time, as that's won, she begins to see physical beauty as well. This is why seventy year old couples can act like they are really madly in love with each other. Over time, what you see as old wrinkled skin, they see as the beauty of the person they have loved for fifty years.

The other event here is the common belief that people have that they don't really notice advertisements, when in fact they do on a subconscious level. Hence Kasumi's efforts to connect with John start out looking rather comical though in the end he does connect. Just the same I imagine Kasumi getting rather irritated over time as John and Tali have their little date walking by advertisement vid after advertisement vid.

**Chapter Thirteen - Shakeup On (the) Horizon**

There is on the net, a pile of web sights which contain thousands of observations that Evil Overlords have made about their fates in the arts and dramas of our age. People don't realize how really hard it is to make a multi-layered complex evil personality precisely because in the end, evil is so boringly monotoned. I don't fault Bioware for making Harbinger so melodramatic, indeed I used that reality to make him just a little comical. But likewise this monotoned personality of the Reapers is going to have a military consequence when the war begins. But you don't have to take my word for it, you too can read Sun Tzu. Or any other writings of Military Strategists over the past 2,500 years.

**Chapter Fourteen - Summer In Illium**

I don't normally care for swear words and if you noticed, I was very limited in their application despite the fact that certain words show up in the games. I realized as a writer once upon a time that if I was going to accurately portray people, I was going to have to deal with the fact that some folks have what is known around here as the potty mouth. So Aria and Jack both get to swear but they only use the words they used in the game. Jack's descent into hell is borrowed from another fan fic author on this site. But in keeping with the theme of suffering fixing stupid (e.g. Evil) Jack comes out at the end a better woman.

**Chapter Fifteen - Dead God Dreaming**

H.P. Lovecraft is the inspiration for the Reapers, at least according to the rumor mill and this is the inspiration for the title of the chapter. Likewise I get to poke a few holes into Bioware's handling of the dead reaper's discovery based upon what is known as the science of odds. In fact, the science of odds very much is at odds with the entire idea in the canon that the Reapers have been doing this sort of thing for nearly a billion years. It's hard enough justifying the Reapers having a set of harvests which have lasted a quarter of a million years, but a billion? Ain't gonna happen folks, especially since the Reapers are so utterly unimaginable in their tactics and methods.

Right now they are having one heck of a debate in Archeological circles over whether the Sphinx could be eight thousand years old since they have discovered serious water erosion on the edges of the pavilion which was, up until recently, under the sand around the Sphinx. In short, the science of Archeology tells us just how long things are capable of lasting and a painting of a leviathan on a stone wall isn't going to be a billion years old. We have rock formations which could be the foundations of the continents and they could be a billion years old. But they are also not as large as they were when they were first formed. They have eroded quite a bit and this is granite we are talking about. For this reason the time line in my fan fic is Leviathans, Inusannon, Protheans, and now. I left it open for the possibility of a race between the Leviathans and Inusannon, but I did not get specific.

But it was also in this chapter that I begin to get the picture of how indoctrination can rationally work on all free willed species.

**Chapter Sixteen - Shopping and Treason**

It is one thing to have a sentient being call another sentient being a heretic, because of course very few people today know just what the word means. But to have a synthetic being who does not have free will and accordingly can only behave along rational lines do it is rather sloppy on Bioware's part.

Heresy is a salad bar approach to reality. You take those parts of reality you like, throw out the rest, and refuse to provide an alternative. As long as you and those who agree with you are providing a consistent rational alternative to your opponents, you are not a heretic, you are in disagreement.

The psychology of heresy lends itself to sound bytes and violence when the intellectual flaws in this approach manifest themselves. You don't want to have to deal with heretics, they are a nasty bunch if you happen to ask the sorts of questions which expose their rejection of facts. Needless to say I had to come up with a rational reason for the Geth 'heretics' working with the Reapers. The laws of logic are like that, even if you are making a wrong turn in your thinking, logic's requirements will direct your error along specific predictable pathways. Case in point, my brother in law is paranoid schizophrenic. It is only a matter of time before he concludes I am an alien from the Andromeda galaxy here to eat him, or something equally difficult to believe for reasons having to do with something equally disconnected (such as my shoe styles). This is why we can diagnose this particular mental illness. Logic still works (albeit very badly) in the mentally ill. If it didn't we would not be able to diagnose them.

Thus I had the 'heretics' suffering from a form of primitive indoctrination which was solved not by rewriting the code, but by putting information back in which had been taken from them by the Reapers. You see, the mark of free will is the ability to make a choice, even when that choice flies in the face of all facts and reason. The Geth do not have that free will, not yet. They won't until the Reaper upgrades.

Hence the moral dilemma of Bioware which provoked so many discussions (even on that web series Extra Credits) was a false dilemma based on Bioware's faulty understanding of heresy and free will. I have no problem with those who engaged in the mental wrestling with the decision. Bioware had a great idea. But for those of us who understand how free will and logic and heresy actually fit together, it was a false dilemma which I solved (rewrite) with no mental stress or ethical soul searching. Getting the Quarians to stand down in Mass Effect 3 so that the Geth can have free will, that was where my palms were sweating. Because there I knew what was at stake. I hate that moment, because if I didn't do everything right, the Quarians and Tali die. But I never will deny the Geth free will.

**Chapter Seventeen - Yust Like That**

One of the reviewers noted that Legion and Tali negotiating with the Geth on the Alarai made a lot of sense and wondered why Bioware didn't put that in. Probably because Bioware was making a shooter. Likewise it was a very infrequent thing, given the timing of the game, for Legion to be in more than a handful of missions before the collector base. But even so, to me it was a perfect opportunity to stick within the lore but at the same time offer an alternative. "To defeat an enemy without fighting, that is the acme of skill," observes Sun Tzu. So it informs the reader that Shepherd is learning the skills of generalship, something he's really going to need come Mass Effect 3. Likewise because Tali does all the work and gets all the credit, that has an impact as well.

**Chapter Eighteen - Questioning Their Judgement**

One of the things the Jewish Scriptures likes to observe is how traps set by the powerful for the deaths of innocents can often be the thing that the powerful fall into. I've seen this double edged sword play itself out again and again among the political in my life. And what amazes me more is that they never seem to learn the hard way, that is, when it happens to them, it teaches them nothing. So it is with delicious irony that Shepherd is able, by dangling the home world in front of the common Quarians, to shut down the entire collection of Admiral agendas and exonerate Tali. The appeal to her heroism in the past that the game offers strikes me as a little weak. And as anyone who's worked with the political can tell you, last year's hero is this year's 'who?'. It does not matter to many what you did last week, what matters is what you're doing now. Shortly after the end of Desert Storm, General Swartzkoph was riding high on the popularity that comes from leading a winning war. My aunt however, having lived in Washington's inner circle for years observed that he had two years to 'make his mark' before he would be forgotten. Of course Shepherd likewise employs a little blackmail to top it off. He has no real clue of there is anything incriminating in the date they've just secured, but it's a good bet and since there is so much wheeling and dealing in the political world, it is pretty much a sure bet there's something embarrassing in that pile of stuff.

The first thing I learned when I got serious enough with a girl to start talking marriage, was that her parents would start pulling out the baby pictures. Since I was serious about marrying three different women, I got three different sets of childhood memories. So naturally Admiral Raan entertains the crew with stories of Tali's childhood.

**Chapter Nineteen - Rolling Thunder Honeymoon**

I have been told that there is no such thing as a wedding in which something does not go wrong. My wedding did nothing to prove that rumor wrong, nor my father's and mothers, nor my mother's mother and her father. The idea of John being so deeply sedated that he sleeps through the official bonding time seems the perfect comic complication. Tali, who's been now counting down the seconds since she knows he's going to live long enough to do it gets a very frustrating evening. Suffice to say John's waking up the next morning, realizing what has happened, and his response gives the phrase 'the Tali pounce' a new twist.

I wasn't the only one who saw the potential of that large accretion disk filled with dead ships. In fact because someone else saw that first on Fanfic, I took the idea from them. The science of odds told me that it would be highly unlikely that anything would be still working on those derelicts, but conversely, the lore on the Quarians told me that they wouldn't care. Thus I was able to totally smack down the Normandy and yet keep the crew alive in a believable manner.

**Chapter Twenty - E-mails from the Apocalypse**

Bioware might not have perceived the need for Tali and John to send e-mails to each other but I had no such luxury. Those two had worked too hard for their relationship and I knew it wasn't going to just fade away. So I tell the entire first part of Mass Effect 3 by letter in order to point out that John and Tali are going to correspond. I had one very long distant letter relationship with my second fiancé and accordingly knew about letter writing. Word to the young. If they are slow and sloppy about answering your e-mails, they are not mature enough for a serious relationship. Either be prepared for them to take longer to grow up, or move on.

It was also in this chapter that I slammed Bioware's treatment of Steven Cortez's relationship with his husband. This is one of the reasons why Shepherd is not entirely sympathetic to the idea of a homosexual union. When you wish to convey criticism or sarcasm on how some one else handled something, it works better to have a skeptic or political opponent character express it. It fits more with their pov. So while Shepherd respects both Steven and Samantha for their work and talents, he remains likewise convinced that they both need a little psychiatric help in the love department.

At the same time, it gave me the opportunity to tell the reader what a real loving relationship actually is, that mutual intimacy in knowing each other deeply and the mutual dependance that is necessary for it to be successful. If you convey the idea that you don't need someone, don't be surprised that no one thinks they need you either. Sex is the icing on the cake. It's what makes the cake so tasty. But no one eats a bowl of icing and doesn't feel sick afterwards.

One reviewer told me that letter was thought provoking, so I feel pretty good about it's success in conveying both what Bioware did wrong, and likewise what they should have done right.

Finally, I am able to put Tali in the unenviable position of having her popularity plummet in the political game. It is something which she and John both learn about which directly impacts some of their later decisions. Likewise it also helps explain why, in spite of Tali's efforts to achieve peace with the Geth, she ends up persona non grata.

**Chapter Twenty-two - Wanderer's End**

The Quarian wanderings is an old theme in human folk lore. Hawaii was colonized by the Polynesians based on wanderings, their flight from a cruel religion of human sacrifice which was implemented in Tahiti. You have the Homer and Vergil and their classics. And finally you have The Exodus. So John relates this to Tali and wonders which storyline fits her best.

Among many homosexuals I have known, there is this tendency to make the same sex attraction a defining quality of your life. Since sexual attraction is something which does not last the whole life, it directly contributes to much psychological malfunction in later years. But likewise, Steve's orientation gives me the opportunity to likewise talk about other important elements of a genuine relationship which makes Joker's and EDI's coupling quite sensible.

Finally, John gets to confront the dying Reaper on Rannoch and I am able to illustrate just how shallow and easily answered the Reaper justifications are. The sarcasm he uses is a very nice way of illustrating the shallowness of it. Again, confronted with this reality, the ending is going to prove more than a little troublesome for Bioware.

**Chapter Twenty-three - Rocks On The Beach**

The chief theme of this chapter is the pillow talk, that conversation that couples often engage in right after they have made love. There is a genuine physiological reason why this happens. After love making, in guys, there is a hormone released which produces a bonding emotion. I'm not sure what happens to the girl. I've not asked my wife lately. But she does like to talk afterwards as she's relaxing. It's also one of the few times when everything works for them. It's one of those really romantic moments.

Girls? Clue to if the guy is serious or not. If he jumps out of the bed right after you make love to him, he's deliberately keeping himself from bonding with you. In other words he's using you for sex. If he won't hold you afterwards, find another boyfriend, seriously. And do it tomorrow. And when you find the new one? Make Him Work For It. Really the guy will definitely appreciate you for it way more. My wife pulled that one on me. Of course I was pulling a few tricks of my own (wait two weeks before date two, always keeps them wondering). Suffice to say, we're still married 27 years later. It works.

The final thing was . . . The Picture. Now you can fault Bioware for doing that quickly and some what sloppily. It was a very poorly done photo-shop. But even so, it's not a bad looking face. One person suggested that the reason why that picture sparked so much annoyance was that we finally get to see Tali's face . . . And she's not a space elf. Given so much of the fan art, I would not be surprised that this was a contributing factor. I simply took it at it's face value, but I gave it a back-story. And it's the back-story, that little photography session, that makes the picture mean a lot of things on so many levels for John.

One of the tricks of good writing is this. Play with the cards you are dealt with. That makes you improvise. When you try to force things, you end up with bad writing.

**Chapter Twenty-four - Apartment Love Song**

The DLC for Mass Effect 3 was Bioware's own humor and of course I had to incorporate it into a Romantic Comedy. Especially after some of the hard darkness which they had just gone through. I knew I was going to spend some time there, but I never expected a full four chapters of roughly 24 K words. Even so. I had more fun writing this, starting with that Fleet And Flotilla love song. As stated already I knew that Love Song was going to be a part of the story before I put down the first sentence. It's why that little bit of 'poetry' starts the story. If you haven't noticed, you can sing the theme to it.

The Tali serenade to John was the thing that made me determine that Tali would be my LI for games 2 and 3. And of course it was sung like a Broadway melody, which was entirely inappropriate for a living room video watching. For starters most girls singing to their boyfriends in front of the TV lack the serious training to sound that good. In short, I turned that Broadway style serenade into a young girl singing her heart out to the guy she loves and not quite making it. In my mind, it merely makes the scene more cute.

And of course afterwards, John critiques the Fleet and Flotilla lyrics, which gives him the motive to rewrite them for Tali. It is again the theme of someone thinking things out and questioning them. It's this behavior by John which will literally, as you see at the end of the story, save the galaxy.

What was most fun about this chapter, indeed with much of the Apartment DLC was when we get to 'normalcy' with our couple. John and Tali, for the first time, try to make a home together. Hence the dishwashing. Here's where some of the first chapter long description comes into play. Tali can see dirt on an almost microscopic level, and her thrift won't let her use the dishwasher. So John stands there for a very long time with a towel waiting for her to clean each and every single utensil that they used to cook and eat with. Then of course this becomes a bit of good humored teasing by Garrus, and then in Chapter 39, John alludes to this in his observations about the shallowness of bigotry vis a vis the Reapers. And this is why you block out as much of the story as you can when before you start to write. These little themes can pop up again and again as a result.

**Chapter Twenty-Five - Shotgun Anniversary**

I remember a particular trade show in Vegas. We were staying in the Hotel Venice and I had just sent an E-mail to my wife describing the sights as 'Bringing tacky to the level of an art form'. I walked down to the second floor where they had tried to recreate a set of streets in Venice including the canal with the gondolas. In the middle of this was standing a Buckingham Palace Guard with his little cupola. And I paused for a second and mused how the American Entertainment media could so routinely mix up stuff from one country with another. Because of course there is only one place in the world where you have that uniform and that sort of guard, and that is Buckingham Palace, in London . . . England. Venice of course is in north eastern Italy.

So the deliberate flipping around of reality by the Blasto 7 movie I heartily appreciated and had a great deal of fun playing with Bioware's joke. Of course I set the stage for John and Tali's mockery of the Blasto films back in Chapter Twelve.

Finally, after all the hints about that sushi place, over the various chapters, we have them arrive. Again, Bioware's treatment of relationships just jarred me here. If this place is so fricken awesome why are John and Joker without their love interests? Seriously do you think either of those two would have not gotten a tongue lashing if they had left out their respective's? Especially in the case of Tali which Bioware specifically alluded to. It was one of her long time wishes to eat in that place.

That it was their anniversary was entirely accidental. I was keeping a rough track of time and realized by my notes that it was in fact, their anniversary. So John suddenly realizes this, and observes that things are looking like they are going to work out perfectly. Hence the sudden shoot out becomes a bit more comic as a result.

**Chapter Twenty-six - Cool Hideouts and Parties**

There really isn't much to add here other than the popcorn joke which I used to illustrate how much Tali really remains in the dark about vis a vis human culture and behavior. I've played this sort of joke before, with several characters, such as a young drow priestess confusing a bar brawl with a bachelor party. There's a whole story behind that one which might show up since I wrote it back in my old bioware Neverwinter Nights days.

**Chapter Twenty-Seven - A Clone War**

The patter which takes place in the Archives was one of the fun things about the DLC. I added a few remarks of my own. The first when Wrex makes the jab about Volus bankers fighting better than this which reminded me of the Mud Crabs line in Oblivion. That of course made me think of Skyrim and getting shot in the knee. And finally, my own addition, the "I'm in bed with the big guy" card that Tali plays which, in my mind is the trump for all the bragging.

**Chapter Twenty-Eight - Quiet Times**

Because I set up a time frame for John and Tali's staying in the Apartment of four months, there was plenty of time for all sorts of things to happen. One of the fun moments was the argument between John and Javik which I based off of the argument which Dawkins presses in his book, The God Delusion. Dawkins starts out very good, especially when he uses molecular science to argue that there needs not be any supernatural 'intervention' when a statue moves. Now Dawkins genius here is that he actually does something few atheists do, namely he accepts the theistic claim at face value and proceeds from there. As has been shown time and time again, eyewitness reports are not delusions. The interpretation of what is seen might be off, the description of that which is seen is not. So by accepting the very easily confirmable fact that statues have, in the past, changed their posture, he proceeds to point out the molecular physics which makes such a thing possible thus proving it could be a natural explanation. John of course immediately responds with the theistic counter point which rightly observes that these sorts of phenomena only happen in a religious context. In short, Dawkins argument runs slam into the scientific method known as odds determination. The point of odds determination is the means by which you figure out how likely something is. If the odds against it are just out of the ballpark, you can conclude that it probably did not happen. and if it did, it wasn't just a coincidence.

But that's what makes the argument fun to write about. Both sides are appealing to genuine science and thus it makes the back and forth more amusing. Javik gets the last word in during Chapter Fourty-One. At the same time, the double irony here is that John knows exactly what the facts of the case are because he has directly experienced it. But because Javik has not, he can maintain his position in spite of it.

The moral of the story is this. Never underestimate your opponent's intelligence. A lot of young debaters do this and as a result end up looking like fools.

My wife and I were discussing the good and bad of being together just last week. What had triggered it was that a friend of hers was divorcing her husband after twenty years. She couldn't handle the man's negativity any more. He never appreciated the good and was always dwelling upon the bad. Consequently he had never complimented her, but had criticized her constantly. Nothing she did was ever pleasing to him. Accordingly, she had given up all hope of making him smile or enable herself to feel like she was worth something to him. That's what people who focus on the bad in their lives end up with, a lot of former friends and lovers who have given up on them. It is this musing in bed by Shepherd as he reflects on the good things and bad things about Tali which reflect that self-destructive behavior in people. Once he starts making mental lists, he realizes that there are more good points about her than bad. But that's simply what just about everyone happens to be a compilation of, more good points than bad. But once you focus only on why your life is not perfect, that ceases to be of relevance, for the perfect and good points are seen as entitlements and the bad as failures. You end up miserable in the end.

The lights of the cars flashing across the walls of grandmother's house. That was mine. It wasn't in Maine, it was elsewhere, but that was the one of the enduring memories I have of childhood. I lost both of those grandparents by the time I was 18. That was a magical land they were in and I hated to say goodbye to that house and town.

**Chapter Twenty-Nine - Melancholy Music**

When you finish the Apartment DLC, you see Shepherd leaning on the bannister looking at the Normandy while people go by and the LI muses about all their experiences. There is a sad reflective tune playing in the background and that seemed to me to be the perfect title for the chapter. They are leaving their 'home' and returning to active duty and the first thing that happens is that they find themselves embroiled in another DLC, that of Omega.

It is here that I had to jerk the lore about a bit since I knew that no commander in his right mind would leave his trained crew behind for a ramshackle thrown together pack of boats and people called an army. I forget which ancient military scientist observed it, one of the Greeks I suspect, who stated that people with weapons no more made an army than a pile of stone and wood made a house. The point being that Aria is on her way to getting herself killed in 'the real life' and yet the lore has her winning. I have to find a way to make that happen. Hence the verbal sparring and stubbornness of Shepherd in this chapter. Aria eventually gives in since 'the data' which Liara presents her gives her a very grim report and close to no chance at all.

**Chapter Thirty - I Hate This Place**

Urban fighting has always been a bitch, especially since the advent of modern rifles. The stories from World War II, Korea, Vietnam, and the fighting in the middle east today still reflect that reality. So the fight for Omega turns into a slug fest, just like every other city conflict I've read about or listened to veterans reflect upon. Likewise, since Petrovsky is supposed to be a good general, I make sure he is, in fact, good. While John slowly makes progress suggesting he will, in the end, win it, I never wanted to make that victory a definitive certainty. Which is why, in spite of the apparent progress throughout this chapter, neither Shepherd or Aria take victory for granted.

**Chapter Thirty-One - Elephants**

The last three centuries BC are some of the most interesting and dramatic in human history if you happen to be living on the Mediterranean. It's as if the entire area is on the threshold of something really big about to explode. And in many senses it was. Steam power had been harnessed, electro-chemistry was being experimented upon, and Babbage engines, the proto-computer, were being built. Then, it all died. A new view of the universe, one which denied it's comprehensibility, swept across the Mediterranean and with it the entire civilization sunk into a malaise and despair which did not end until the Carolingian Renaissance of the 700's, thanks primarily to Christianity's insistence that the universe was in fact comprehensible. It's a really neat time to read about and so knowing how creepy and frightening the Adjuncts would be to the ordinary solider on Omega, the military term "seeing the elephant" which comes from that period of history becomes the title and theme of the chapter. If you are unfamiliar with the period, Extra Credits did a three show series on the second Punic War which really sums up one of the epic periods in a time frame which was filled with Cool Friken Awesomeness.

Likewise, the separation of Tali and John's uncertainty of her fate acts as foreshadow for the nearly fatal wound she receives at the end of the story and likewise gives Shepherd the psychological kick in the pants he will need to make his willingness to press on after she's picked up by the Normandy both sensible and heroic.

**Chapter Thirty-Two - Thessia Raped**

One of the unknown stories of World War I was the number of times the Politicians deliberately sabotaged chances of a decent and honorable peace. But also how close several of the armies came to mutiny and how one of them (The French) did. At one point on the Italian front, the entire Italian Army was ready to mass surrender to the Austrians should their political heads try to make them attack those fortifications one more time. The reasons were quite simple. Why the soldiers had gone to war were not the reasons the politicians were willing to stick with. And when your own leadership is betraying your principles and reasons for risking your lives, your willingness to fight and die becomes seriously compromised. Hence when Petrovsky finds himself with 500 reaper clones, after struggling with the catastrophe that was the Adjuncts, he realizes that The Illusive Man is not fighting for the advancement and preservation of Humanity any more and switches sides so that he can do that against a far greater threat, that being the Reapers themselves. This is why it is not seen as a betrayal, Petrovsky switches sides rather than compromise his principles. Traitors switch sides because they have no principles.

But the theme of political betrayal and stupidity continues to play out in Shepherd's private musings while dealing with the Asari and the struggle to get the information on the Catalyst in order for the Crucible to work. The Asari's deliberate concealment of that information directly contributes to Cerberus' ability to secure it before Shepherd's team does.

**Chapter Thirty-Three - Illusive Bullseye**

The phrase "it is always darkest before the dawn" is not just a meteorological statement. It is a very real psychological phenomena which people experience when they are so overwhelmed with a sudden defeat or reversal of fortune that they don't realize that everything is just about to break free. Cerberus could have, in theory, been way more troublesome and treacherous. Destroying Cerberus is a very necessary component of the final victory since only after Cerberus is destroyed can it be said that all of the species are in complete unity against the Reapers. And while I don't mention it, the reader is reminded that once again, it's the humans who have proven treacherous.

But likewise it gave me the opportunity to reflect on that quality of evil which is one of unstoppable victory right up to the self-destruct. It happens all the time in real life, but people don't see it so clearly because it does not happen with the swift assurance that drama enables the writer to employ. But the point ultimately is this. The evil person or force does not see the threat coming that is the one designated to get them. And Bioware did it one better. It's not Shepherd who provides the 'threat', it's Miranda. The thing they did not see coming was the tracer on Kai Leng.

**Chapter Thirty-Four - Emergency Induction Port**

Thanks to things set up by myself in prior chapters, Tali does not have a straw for her drinking after the Sanctuary Mission. But as she's drunk, it really doesn't matter what she's using. And friends and family give gifts to newly wed couples. It is, in a subtle way, another dig I employ at Bioware's handling of the relationships in the game. But even so, because we are now talking about a married couple and not a boy and girl friend, there are slight shifts in the vocabulary used, as well as how it ends.

My daughter and I have often designed games together and likewise I have other friends which stop by my store and we chat during slow times about game design. The idea of 'cool' is a prominent part of our discussions because it seems to be a prominent part of professional work as well. Hence I have practical and sensible Tali observing that the secret entrance to the lab is not only poorly placed and thus highly unlikely to be used, but also a very large waste of resources. Garrus simply replies that it's 'cool' and that proves the unstoppable argument.

**Chapter Thirty-five - Tali's Interview**

This is first alluded to in Chapter Seven. I had not planned to do it then, it was merely a writer's trick to tell that next section of the story a little differently. The Mako's handling in the game makes it seem like Shepherd is a really crazy driver, which became a Fan Fic running gag in numerous stories. Putting the Krogan behind the wheel struck me as Shepherd times twenty with high volume screaming to boot. But the more I thought about it, the more I was reminded of a short story by Mark Twain in which he is trying to get rid of an interviewer by answering the various questions in such a fashion as to render it nearly impossible to conduct the interview. Suddenly it dawned on me that Tali could have a bit of fun too, like re-telling numerous parts of the story while leaving specific details out. Thus creating an entirely different impression of the events. So I ended up doing the interview after all and we have Tali retelling their wedding night and the Citadel DLC with that Tali sense of humor. When I was typing this, I could almost literally hear Tali speaking the lines.

It's one last little bit of humor before everything starts to get very dark.

**Chapter Thirty-six - A United Fleet**

During the fiftieth anniversary of WWII, all the Russians and Germans who had participated in the world's greatest tank battle at Kursk got together at the sight of the battle and had, from what reports managed to get out, a big blow out of a party. It's one of those fascinating things about soldiering. Former enemies quickly become friends because in the end, you have so much in common.

And then we get to the actual battle. Since we were dealing with a galactic scale of events here, it struck me as absurd to have such small numbers as were suggested by the Bioware renditions of the battle. So I filled out the military rooster a bit. Furthermore I wanted to make sure that a 36 hours space battle would be regarded as realistic enough for the readers. Of course it's been over a hundred years since decisive battles were fought in the course of a day. By the time of the Civil War, two and three day battles being fought before things were determined began to be the order of the day. Some battles of the twentieth century lasted even longer. So I make sure the numbers involved are understood, thus showing how powerful the reapers are, in that they have less than ten thousand going up against a quarter of a million ships and they are winning. But likewise, the reapers are not invulnerable. They take casualties.

**Chapter Thirty-Seven - London Battle**

Throughout the game, the persistent impression I got was that the typical Reaper foot soldier was only about half as good as a typical species soldier. They were in short, the monsters you got to shoot at and were not that great a threat save in the numbers that were employed. Furthermore, the psychology of the Reapers pretty much made it essential for me to present those monsters as somewhat low grade as well. So against a determined push, the Reaper ground forces are simply incapable of fighting on their own and winning. They need Reaper assistance, and with the Reapers tied down by the fleet up top, for the first time in the war, the forces are able to take back a city. Having made all that sensible I simply describe a city battle in which overwhelming force is being applied, but likewise, again, I use everything at my disposal, but especially the Rachni who provide the means for the allied forces to avoid the Omega slugfest which I set up prior. And once the Reapers return, it returns to a state of slaughter for the allied species.

**Chapter Thirty-Eight - Spectre's Ghost**

One of the reviewers noted that I had been misspelling Spectre throughout the story. He's right. But it was one of those things which was too deep into the story and would require too much time for me to go through all forty one chapters and fix it. So I said (Metaphorically speaking of course) "F-bomb it" and titled this chapter with the correct spelling as an atonement.

We have the struggle in the Citadel. Having determined how indoctrination works, that now plays it's part in the verbal fencing between Shepherd and The Illusive Man. But also, remembering how Mass Effect 1 ended, and likewise the condition Anderson and Shepherd are in at this juncture, to allow Tim to kill himself is a serious plot hole for Bioware. So Shepherd, in an act of compassion, maims Tim instead rather than kill him. It does give Tim a few more lines.

Finally we have the beginning of 'the ending' and I have Shepherd respond, in my mind way more sensibly to the fact that he is speaking to the being who 'runs' the Reapers. Again we have a serious plot hole by the Bioware. But fortunately my Shepherd is smart enough to be sensibly cautious when confronted with 'the leader of the Reapers' after having received a set of cliche's and sound bytes which only confirm to the ordinary person in or playing the game, that we are dealing with some very old and nasty evil here. And while Rush Limbaugh is wrong when he suggests that All Liberals Lie . . . It is the case that All Evil Things Lie. No sensible person is going to trust Harbinger's Ghost once they know it's Harbinger.

**Chapter Thirty-Nine - None of The Above**

By this point I trust that the title gave away the 'decision' which Shepherd makes. It seemed the best title for the chapter given that we're dealing exclusively with the choice which Shepherd has to make. Again, I knew before I ever started the first sentence of the story that this was how it was going to end. I blocked it out extensively in my head. Garrus, being the C-sec cop would be the perfect person to solve the problem because the simplest solution was hooking up the Crucible to the power source which was the Citadel. So, plug it in and it goes on. And since the Citadel is turned off, or you are clearly left with that impression by what you experience when you are in the Citadel, why not just turn it back on? And if you can open the panels that easily, which Shepherd does in the first game, why not have it being done from any ordinary Omni-terminal?

Thus, the three way choice can easily be demonstrated to being one last bit of sabotage by the Reapers, the Crucible can still work when hooked up to the Catalyst, and we can save the galaxy with as little damage to the lore as possible.

And of course now that it's working the way it's supposed to work, it does so without blowing everything up. The Relays remain undamaged and John and Tali can head to Rannoch right after the wedding and reception.

But likewise, because it's now an ordinary weapon, it's going to have another consequence as well. You see, there's no such thing as a perfect weapon. Someone always survives, and so some Reapers do get away. And they will be back.

And that wedding reception scene was one of those scenes I blocked out before I started to write the story. I got that idea from my cousin who played the love theme from The Titanic to his bride at their wedding reception. But unlike my cousin's bride (who cheated on him six months later when he left on tour for Desert Storm) Tali deserved her serenade.

**Chapter Forty - A Married Life**

Just about everything that happens to John and Tali while they are married is lifted from my and my wife's experiences, those of our friends, next door neighbors, people I have known in the past, some of the shoulders I've rubbed. Who inspired what I'm not going to say much about since some of this stuff would open a few wounds or simply embarrass them (such as the beach incident). But again, I knew how Tali would die and when before the first sentence was written, and accordingly, that fear that John has throughout the story that this could be the last time he and she are together proves to be not unfounded. It turns out to be a pretty ordinary life with happiness and sadness. And then John is left alone. And we get to our final chapter.

**Chapter Forty-One - The Last Mission**

By the time of this chapter, close to fifty years have passed since the Reaper War. Rannoch is fully settled and built, the spaceport is a big and bustling city, and the species are starting to fight with each other again. This is human history write large and in tears. The new generation never remembers the old generation's experiences and often falls into the same traps which the old generation survivors tried to keep them from doing.

John is in his seventies, and then one day Javik shows up with the news that the Reapers have returned, and what's more, they're smarter now. In order for there to be a good ending with the galaxy united, there's going to have to be a threat which has to be addressed by unity. One of the reasons why the Saracens were such a pain in the posterior of Europe from the 800's to the 1800's was simply because Europe would not unite to deal with the threat. But then again, the Saracen's never had the ability to enslave all of Europe and destroy it.

The Reapers are a different matter altogether. And by frightening the new generation of leaders with the eye-witness accounts of what the Reapers are capable of doing, we kick start the galaxy into unity to resist the attacks. As a consequence, the Galaxy has the means by which they can keep the Reapers from doing too much damage while they slowly learn how to achieve technological parity and eventually destroy them. By then so much time will have passed that the old hatreds will have died out. So in theory we have a better galaxy coming into being over the next few centuries which is why Liara is writing her biography of Shepherd exactly 500 years after the events.

And again, this is human history. Serious world embracing threats do generate sufficient response that guarantees that the threat will not overwhelm all the earth. But there are always casualties because many of the young fall for the same tricks. In my lifetime, and in my father's lifetime, and in my grandmother's lifetime (who lived to be 102), we have witnessed the unity of the world against two major spirit killing political movements which both threatened to become global. And likewise, we are watching a new generation of kids getting sucked into a new redefinition of those ideologies which will only leave yet another generation of wounded to deal with.

But that's why there is pain and suffering. You have each generation of humans making the same sorts of stupids which produces the same sorts of catastrophic consequences, which destroy lives and families, and if left unchecked long enough, cities, states, nations, and even the occasional civilization.

And of course we have John and Tali reunited which is how the story ends, with a real happy ending.

The number of Reapers John killed on his armor was based on a bit of obscure lore which has a very old history and most people don't know it's origins, so I'm going to go off topic and tell you because it will give you a hint as to how the logical process in a creative work sometimes operates.

Back in the first century one of the last of the surviving students of Christ was suffering exile on the Greek island of Patmos. His name was John. There, he wrote a book called The Apocalypse which tells the story of him being taken into heaven, participating in the Mass which is being held up there, and seeing the world undergo judgement.

We don't know exactly when he wrote the book because it purports to be a prophecy of soon to come events, as well as events which will repeat themselves at the end of time. And John draws much of his imagery from the Roman-Jewish War of AD 67 to 73. Those who don't think there's such a thing as prophecy say after 70, those who do say before 67. But at the time the Roman Imperator was (or had just been) Nero and John uses him and his lifestyle (and Nero's Jewish mistress) as his imagery for a being (and his whore) who has filled Christian lore since. The being is known as the Anti-Christ. To make who he's alluding to clear to his audience, he pulls an old code trick which was common among Jewish authors who would occasionally need to write something which would not give away their sources (or themselves). Each letter of the Jewish alphabet has a numerical designation and when you spell out Nero's name in the hebrew alphabet and then add up the numbers, you get the number 666.

Which is known as the number of the beast and has acquired it's own bit of lore since then among those who like to dabble in the occult or suggest that being evil is a great way to rebel against your parents. And since youth is naive, they fall for this and every so often we get to bury the consequences in a sad ceremony known as a funeral.

Suffice to say the number of Reapers who were killed in the firing of the Crucible was 60 times 60 times 60 or 216,000 less 6 times 6 times 6, which left you with 215,784.

* * *

It's kind of odd to think the story's finished. I started on it in November and finished it in April. There was a crises in the middle where I was unable to get online at my shop and was unable to keep researching the lore and dialogues of the game so I had to do that at home which interfered with my homestyle. Yet in spite of that I enjoyed every moment of it. I wonder if I'll ever write something like this again. I'd like to think I would, but since it was entirely for fun, some game or movie is going to have to give me the impetus to do so.

I hope you enjoyed it as well. Of course if you are reading even this long exposition, you probably did. I've found the favs and follows immensely gratifying. It's not the biggest story on the net, nor the most popular, but it's respectable. And that is way more than I imagined I'd get. But in the end, what I hope happens is that somewhere out there, someone reads this and cries when John and Tali embrace at the end. Only then will I consider this story a success. And if they don't leave a review, I'll never know. But that's how it happens sometimes.

This from Jack.


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